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How To Stop Worrying & Start Living
The book 'How to stop worrying & start living' suggest many ways to conquer worry and lead a wonderful life.
The book mentions fundamental facts to know about worry and magic formula for solving worry-some situations.
Psychologists & Doctors' view:
Worry can make even the most stolid person ill.
Worry may cause nervous breakdown.
Worry can even cause tooth decay
Worry is one of the factors for High Blood Pressure.
Worry makes you tense and nervous and affect the nerves of your stomach.
The book suggests basic techniques in analysing worry, step by step, in order to cope up with them.
A very interesting feature of the book is 'How to eliminate 50% of your business worries'.
The book offers 7 ways to cultivate a mental attitude that will bring you peace and happiness. Also, the golden rule for conquering worry, keeping your energy & spirits high.
The book consists of some True Stories which will help the readers in conquering worry to lead you to success in life.
The book is full of similar incidences and narrations which will make our readers to understand the situation in an easy way and lead a happy life. A must read book for everyone.
321 pages, Kindle Edition
First published January 1, 1944
17748 people are currently reading
223172 people want to read
About the author
Dale Carnegie
1,483 books8,998 followersDale Carnegie was an American writer and teacher of courses in self-improvement, salesmanship, corporate training, public speaking, and interpersonal skills. Born into poverty on a farm in Missouri, he was the author of How to Win Friends and Influence People (1936), a bestseller that remains popular today. He also wrote How to Stop Worrying and Start Living (1948), Lincoln the Unknown (1932), and several other books.
One of the core ideas in his books is that it is possible to change other people's behavior by changing one's behavior towards them.
One of the core ideas in his books is that it is possible to change other people's behavior by changing one's behavior towards them.
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November 11, 2015
"Acceptance of what has happened is the first step to overcoming the consequences of any misfortune."
This book (along with other books by Dale Carnegie) can be life-changing. The book takes the incessant problem of worry, head on. It says that of all the liars in the world most of the time it's our own fears and worries. Worry doesn't take away your troubles but it do take away your peace, that's the main message of the book. He starts very scientifically by searching the causes behind the worry, by taking many case studies. The advice given in the book are really helpful. Its a classic book that must be read if you are in depression and want to come out of it.
Carnegie wrote this book into eight parts.
PART I: Fundamental facts you should know about worry.
Often we worry because we take the burden of both the past and the future with us today. That makes the situation look much more difficult. What we should do is to focus just on today.To solve worry situations, there are three steps you should do. First, ask yourself “what is the worst that could happen?”. Second, be willing to accept the worst if necessary. Third, calmly try to fix the situation you have accepted.
PART II: Basic Techniques in Analyzing Worry.
To overcome worrying, you should know how to analyze and solve worry problems. You can do that by finding and collecting all the facts, analyzing those facts, making a decision, and act on it. We usually worry about something we are uncertain about. Once we get everything clear, we can see what we should do about it.
PART III: How to Break the Worry Habit Before it Breaks You.
There is one simple way to crowd worry out of your mind: make yourself busy. When our mind is occupied with work, we won’t have time to worry. I think it applies not only to worry, but to all kinds of negative thoughts as well. We will greatly decrease their influence if we are busy doing something constructive. Often we aren’t happy because we try to change things we can’t change. One should learn to identify those things and accept them.
PART IV: Ways to Cultivate a Mental Attitude That Will Bring You Peace and Happiness.
There is a “magic” way to cure depression: make other people happy. If you focus on how to make others happy, you will inevitable make yourself happy. The less you think about yourself, the more you will be happy.
One more important Rule: Instead of worrying about ingratitude, let expect it.
PART V: The Perfect Way to Conquer Worry.
Carnegie wrote in his book that one day when his father returned from Maryville, where the banker had threatened to foreclose the mortgage, he stopped his horses on a bridge crossing a river, got off the wagon, and stood for a long time looking down at the water, debating with himself whether he should jump in and end it all.
Years later, Carnegie Sr. told him that the only reason he didn’t jump was because of his mother’s deep, abiding, and joyous belief that if we loved God and kept His commandments everything would come out all right. His Mother was right. Everything did come out all right in the end. His Father lived forty-two happy years longer, and died in 1941, at the age of eighty-nine.
PART VI: How to Keep From Worrying About Criticism.
Do your work as good as possible and then open your umbrella so that the rain of criticisms won’t touch you. Once I’ve done my best, I can be happy no matter what people say.
One of the best teachers is your own experience. You can learn from it by taking notes of the fool things you have done and criticize yourself. If you constantly do this, you will constantly improve yourself.
PART VII: 6 Ways to Prevent Fatigue and Worry and Keep Your Energy and Spirits High.
Dale Carnegie listed down the following six ways in his book: Rest before you get tired; Learn to relax at your work; Learn to relax at home; Apply good working habits (clear your desk of all papers except those relating to the immediate problem at hand; do things in the order of their importance; when you face a problem, solve it then and there if you have the facts necessary to make a decision; and learn to organize, deputize, and supervise); To prevent worry and fatigue, put enthusiasm into your work; and Remember that no one was ever killed by lack of sleep. It is worrying about insomnia that does the damage – not the insomnia itself. If you can’t sleep, get up and work or read until you do feel sleepy.
While it may seem counter intuitive, one of the best ways to increase your productivity is to take rest regularly. Take rest before you feel tired. Doing this simple thing will energize yourself throughout the day and enable you to accomplish more.
Learning to banish boredom is essential for happiness. An effective way to do that is by making what you do interesting. Even things that look boring can be made interesting if you are creative.
PART VIII: “How I Conquered Worry”.
This part contains many stories of individuals who applied the principles outlined in previous parts. There are also some new tips that haven’t been covered before.
.....................................................................
Reading How to Stop Worrying and Start Living is like reading centuries’ worth of wisdom in one book.
Highly Recommended!
This book (along with other books by Dale Carnegie) can be life-changing. The book takes the incessant problem of worry, head on. It says that of all the liars in the world most of the time it's our own fears and worries. Worry doesn't take away your troubles but it do take away your peace, that's the main message of the book. He starts very scientifically by searching the causes behind the worry, by taking many case studies. The advice given in the book are really helpful. Its a classic book that must be read if you are in depression and want to come out of it.
Carnegie wrote this book into eight parts.
PART I: Fundamental facts you should know about worry.
Often we worry because we take the burden of both the past and the future with us today. That makes the situation look much more difficult. What we should do is to focus just on today.To solve worry situations, there are three steps you should do. First, ask yourself “what is the worst that could happen?”. Second, be willing to accept the worst if necessary. Third, calmly try to fix the situation you have accepted.
PART II: Basic Techniques in Analyzing Worry.
To overcome worrying, you should know how to analyze and solve worry problems. You can do that by finding and collecting all the facts, analyzing those facts, making a decision, and act on it. We usually worry about something we are uncertain about. Once we get everything clear, we can see what we should do about it.
PART III: How to Break the Worry Habit Before it Breaks You.
There is one simple way to crowd worry out of your mind: make yourself busy. When our mind is occupied with work, we won’t have time to worry. I think it applies not only to worry, but to all kinds of negative thoughts as well. We will greatly decrease their influence if we are busy doing something constructive. Often we aren’t happy because we try to change things we can’t change. One should learn to identify those things and accept them.
PART IV: Ways to Cultivate a Mental Attitude That Will Bring You Peace and Happiness.
There is a “magic” way to cure depression: make other people happy. If you focus on how to make others happy, you will inevitable make yourself happy. The less you think about yourself, the more you will be happy.
One more important Rule: Instead of worrying about ingratitude, let expect it.
PART V: The Perfect Way to Conquer Worry.
Carnegie wrote in his book that one day when his father returned from Maryville, where the banker had threatened to foreclose the mortgage, he stopped his horses on a bridge crossing a river, got off the wagon, and stood for a long time looking down at the water, debating with himself whether he should jump in and end it all.
Years later, Carnegie Sr. told him that the only reason he didn’t jump was because of his mother’s deep, abiding, and joyous belief that if we loved God and kept His commandments everything would come out all right. His Mother was right. Everything did come out all right in the end. His Father lived forty-two happy years longer, and died in 1941, at the age of eighty-nine.
PART VI: How to Keep From Worrying About Criticism.
Do your work as good as possible and then open your umbrella so that the rain of criticisms won’t touch you. Once I’ve done my best, I can be happy no matter what people say.
One of the best teachers is your own experience. You can learn from it by taking notes of the fool things you have done and criticize yourself. If you constantly do this, you will constantly improve yourself.
PART VII: 6 Ways to Prevent Fatigue and Worry and Keep Your Energy and Spirits High.
Dale Carnegie listed down the following six ways in his book: Rest before you get tired; Learn to relax at your work; Learn to relax at home; Apply good working habits (clear your desk of all papers except those relating to the immediate problem at hand; do things in the order of their importance; when you face a problem, solve it then and there if you have the facts necessary to make a decision; and learn to organize, deputize, and supervise); To prevent worry and fatigue, put enthusiasm into your work; and Remember that no one was ever killed by lack of sleep. It is worrying about insomnia that does the damage – not the insomnia itself. If you can’t sleep, get up and work or read until you do feel sleepy.
While it may seem counter intuitive, one of the best ways to increase your productivity is to take rest regularly. Take rest before you feel tired. Doing this simple thing will energize yourself throughout the day and enable you to accomplish more.
Learning to banish boredom is essential for happiness. An effective way to do that is by making what you do interesting. Even things that look boring can be made interesting if you are creative.
PART VIII: “How I Conquered Worry”.
This part contains many stories of individuals who applied the principles outlined in previous parts. There are also some new tips that haven’t been covered before.
.....................................................................
Reading How to Stop Worrying and Start Living is like reading centuries’ worth of wisdom in one book.
Highly Recommended!
September 20, 2025
"ويحسن أن أخبرك أنك لن تجد في هذا الكتاب شيئاً جديداً ولكنك ستجد الشيء الكثير مما يتجاهله الناس. وهذا هو المهم.. فلا أنت ولا أنا, نحتاج إلى شيء جديد يقال... فإننا نعلم ما يكفي لأن يجعل حياتنا كاملة من جميع نواحيها. فعِلّتنا ليست الجهل, وإنما هي التجاهل . ومهمة هذا الكتاب هي تكرار حقائق قديمة معروفة مع تجسيمها , وإبرازها, لتحفزك على تطبيقها"
هكذا بدأ الكاتب بعرض كتابه, ويجب علي الاعتراف بأنني أحب الحقائق المنمقة جداً,
ثم شرع يتحدث عن السبب الرئيسي للقلق, ويقتبس من توماس كارليل بأنه:
"ليس علينا أن نتطلع إلى هدف يلوح لنا باهتاً على البعد, وإنما علينا أن ننجز ما بين أيدينا من عمل واضح بيّن"
فـ"ليس اليوم إلا حياة جديدة لقوم يعقلون", وعليك بمبدأ "خطوة واحدة تكفيني", فالتفكير في هموم الغد دائما هي السبب الأول لأزمة القلق,
ثم يشرع يسرد ويفصل وجهة نظره:
"إني أريدك أن تنظر إلى حياتك كأنها ساعة زجاجية كتلك التي استخدمت قديماً لتحديد الوقت. أنت تعلم أن هناك آلافاً من حبات الرمل توضع في نصف هذه الساعة الأعلى فتمر ببطء, وفي نظام دقيق من خلال الرقبة الضيقة إلى نصفها الأسفل, فلا أنت ولا أنا نستطيع أن ندفع بأكثر من حبة واحدة إلى عنق الساعة دون أن نصيبها بخلل. وأنت وأنا والناس جميعاً كهذه الساعة الزجاجية. فعندما نصحو في الصباح نجد مئات الأعمال في انتظارنا, فإذا لم نصف الأعمال كلاً بدوره, وعلى حده, في بطء وانتظام, كما تنزلق حبات الرمل من عنق الساعة الزجاجية, فإننا نعرض كياننا الجسماني والعقلي لخطر التحطيم"
وهذا لا يعني إهمال المستقبل تماماً ولكن:
التفكير المتزن يعالج الأسباب والنتائج, ويفضي إلى خطة منطقية إنشائية, وأما التفكير الأحمق فيفضي إلى التوتر والانهيار العصبي.
ثم يحذرنا بما كتب"ستيفن ليكوك" يقول:
"ما أعجب الحياة! يقول الطفل: متى أشب فأصبح غلاماً؟.. ويقول الغلام, متى أترعرع فأصبح شاباً؟.. ويقول الشاب: متى أتزوج؟ .. فإذا تزوج قال: متى أصبح شيخاً متفرغاً؟ .. فإذا واتته الشيخوخة , تطلع إلى المرحلة التي قطعها من عمره, فإذا هي تلوح كأن ريحاً اكتسحتها اكتساحا . إننا لا نتعلم إلا بعد فوات الأوان, أن قيمة الحياة في أن نحياها, في أن نحيا كل يوم منها وكل ساعة"
ويجدر بي أن أذكر لكم, أنني قمت بتبديل لفظ "عندما" بـ"متى" كي يستقيم معنى النص السابق, فكلا الكلمتان ذو أصل إنجليزي واحد وهي كلمة "when", ولا أدرى سبب لمثل هذا الخطأ في فهم سياق الجملة الواضح كالشمس, سوى أن المترجم استهتر كثيراً, فرغم أن الترابط اللغوي للكتاب جيد, إلا أنه توجد بعض الأخطاء في الترجمة, والتي لا يجب أن تثير قلقكم فهي قليلة التكرار وبسيطة بحيث أنكم قد لا تعوا بوجودها أصلا.
وكان الفصل الأول بداية موفقة مفعمة بالقصص التي يدّعي الكاتب أنها كلها حقيقية, وأنا أميل لتصديقه بعد التدقيق في القصص,
ولكني افتقدت وجود إدراج بعض الشروحات العلمية والعصبية للمشكلة,
- فمثلاً يمكنني أن أزيد على ما قاله الكاتب, بأن العقل يميل دائماً لأن يتخلص من الألم الذي يحل به, والذي قد ينتج عن التفكير المتزايد جراء القلق. فيقوم العقل في سبيل التخلص من هذا الألم بدفع الجسد لحالة النوم, فتشعر بالنعاس والحاجة للنوم, وبالتأكيد فأنت لن تستطيع حل مشاكلك وأنت نائم.
- كما أنني يمكنني الإشارة إلى البحث الذي تحدث عن أن الحضارة قد بدأت بعد طفرة جينية حدثت للبشر جعلتهم أقل عنفاً وأكثر برودا وتحكماً في انفعالاتهم, ولن نكون مخطئين عندما نقول بأن القلق والاضطرابات الناتجة عنه تقع ضمن هذا الانفعالات.
- وأيضاً كنت لأذيّل الفصل الذي يتحدث عن الأمراض التي تسببها القلق, بأن القلق والاكتئاب الناتج عنه يُضعف الجهاز المناعي, ويقلل من كرات الدم البيضاء المسئولة عن الدفاع عن الجسم ضد مختلف الأمراض.
ولعدم وجود مثل تلك الشروحات العلمية آثرت أن أمنع عنه النجمة الخامسة, وهذا بالطبع لا ينقص من محتوى الكتاب كتوثيق للوقائع والتي جرى استنباط "قوانين" تحكم عملية القلق منها, حتى وإن كان غائباً وجود "نظرية" تشرح لماذا يحدث كل هذا. فنحن الآن نعتمد على "قوانين" نيوتن التي تحكم الجاذبية من خلال الوقائع التي شاهدها, ويزوّدنا أينشتين بـ"النظرية" المناسبة التي تفسر لنا لماذا تحدث الجاذبية !!
إذاً فلدى الكاتب نقص في المراجع العلمية, ويبدو أن لنشأته العلمية المتواضعة السبب الأكبر. ولم يؤثر هذا في نقص المراجع العلمية فقط, بل جعلني أتحسس مسدسي -مَلَكَتِي النقدية- عندما يُورِد الكاتب أَيّة شواهد يصفها بالعلمية, لأن تطبيق القوانين العلمية على موضوعاته جاء بالغ الركاكة.
كما أنني لاحظت أنه يتعمد عندما يسرد الشواهد العلمية أو الحلول الدينية أن ينشأ عبارات تحتمل التأويل بشكل كبير في صالح الحلول الوهمية السهلة للقارئ, رغم أنها مبنية على أسس صحيحة, لكنه كان يريد أن يَمُط مداها كحلول لأبعد مما تستطيع الاحتمال!!
الكتاب عموما يستحق القراءة للذين عانوا القلق مثلي, فحتى وإن كنت تعلم محتوى نصائحه مسبقاً, فلسوف تُسَرِّي عنك وتشد من أزْرك قصص المرضى السابقين الذي نجحوا في تخطي عقبة القلق. أما من لم يعانوا من جحيم القلق قبلاً ويقرءون الكتاب للتسلية, فقد يصيبهم الملل من جراء تلك القصص, بل وقد يعتبرونها أسوأ جزء في الكتاب.
**
تحديث:
هذا الكتاب هو الأصل الأجنبي لكتاب "لا تحزن", حيث قام عائض القرني بسرقة المحتوى الأساسي للكتاب, وحوّله إلى خطبة جمعة, بإعادة سرده بطريقته الخاصة بعد إضفاء ما يعرفه من أحاديث وآيات القرآن وأبيات لشعراء عرب, دون ذكر المصدر الأجنبي حتى. وهذه سرقة أدبية لا يجب السكوت عنها, بل ومقاطعة كتاب القرني حتى يعتذر عما فعله, فالكتاب له حقوق أدبية وفكرية ومادية, وليس غنيمة له.
المصدر مدونة مثال:
http://zmital.blogspot.com.eg/2012/06...
August 5, 2024
I almost forgot I had read this book before.
Day-tight compartments strategy is very effective for me.
When I was studying in college, I was so worried about everything. Sometimes I could not concentrate on everything because I worried too much.
Most of the time, you don't know what you are worrying about.
Luckily, I discovered this book in a bookstore. I read one of the chapters regarding "Day tight compartment". I did not buy the book that day. I came back to the bookstore and read again the same chapter.
It helped me a lot and I became more peaceful and positive thinking. Finally, I bought this book to keep and reread many years ago.
Thanks to the author Dale Carnegie.
Day-tight compartments strategy is very effective for me.
When I was studying in college, I was so worried about everything. Sometimes I could not concentrate on everything because I worried too much.
Most of the time, you don't know what you are worrying about.
Luckily, I discovered this book in a bookstore. I read one of the chapters regarding "Day tight compartment". I did not buy the book that day. I came back to the bookstore and read again the same chapter.
It helped me a lot and I became more peaceful and positive thinking. Finally, I bought this book to keep and reread many years ago.
Thanks to the author Dale Carnegie.
January 11, 2012
I think the problem with this book is that it's mostly based on persuasive voice. Once the effects of that wear off, it's hard to be convinced to change an ingrained habit. Although, what helps is a desperation to do so.
There are many examples in this book, but very little "this is why it works". Even more so, the further you go into it, the more the author sounds like "What's the matter with you? Don't you see? Why don't you do this?"; and I think, if this were a person-to-person argument, that's the least effective attitude to take on convincing someone to change something. If one can't get over that tone and recognize their own need, they won't get very much out of this.
Dale Carnegie says he was a salesman at some point, and this shows in the way he speaks in his writing. As we get exposed to more and more commercial approaches in daily life, it makes this approach aged - we know better than to listen to every salesman, no matter how convincing he can be. There needs to be more `meat`on what he says in this book, regardless of that it is true wisdom. He is too proud of his abilities to persuade, and relies mainly on this, over good information. He sounds more like a nagging mother.
Really, what determines the quality of such a book is: did this actually help, and how effectively? Not the language, voice, or nice examples. For me, it has not swayed me in a profound way that would cause me to change, and I feel like there is still a lot of labour left on my part.
There are many examples in this book, but very little "this is why it works". Even more so, the further you go into it, the more the author sounds like "What's the matter with you? Don't you see? Why don't you do this?"; and I think, if this were a person-to-person argument, that's the least effective attitude to take on convincing someone to change something. If one can't get over that tone and recognize their own need, they won't get very much out of this.
Dale Carnegie says he was a salesman at some point, and this shows in the way he speaks in his writing. As we get exposed to more and more commercial approaches in daily life, it makes this approach aged - we know better than to listen to every salesman, no matter how convincing he can be. There needs to be more `meat`on what he says in this book, regardless of that it is true wisdom. He is too proud of his abilities to persuade, and relies mainly on this, over good information. He sounds more like a nagging mother.
Really, what determines the quality of such a book is: did this actually help, and how effectively? Not the language, voice, or nice examples. For me, it has not swayed me in a profound way that would cause me to change, and I feel like there is still a lot of labour left on my part.
June 18, 2012
Fundamental Facts You Should Know About Worry
Rule 1 - If you want to avoid worry, do what Sir William Osler did" Live in "day-tight compartments." Don't stew about the future. Just live each day until bedtime.
Rule 2 - The next time Trouble - with a Capital T - backs you up in a corner, try the magic formula of Willis H. Carrier:
a. Ask yourself, "What is the worst that can possibly happen if I can't solve my problem?"
b. Prepare yourself mentally to accept the worst - if necessary.
c. Then calmly try to improve upon the worst - which you have already mentally agreed to accept.
Rule 3 - Remind yourself of the exorbitant price you can pay for worry in terms of your health. "Those who do not know how to fight worry die young."
Basic Techniques in Analyzing Worry
Rule 1 - Get the facts. Remember that Dean Hakes of Columbia University said that "half the worry in the world is caused by people trying to make decisions before they have sufficient knowledge on which to base a decision.
Rule 2 - After carefully weighing all the facts, come to a decision.
Rule 3 - Once a decision is carefully reached, act! Get busy carrying out your decision - and dismiss all anxiety about the outcome.
Rule 4 - When you or any of your associates, are tempted to worry about a problem, write out and and answer the following questions:
a. What is the problem?
b. What is the cause of the problem?
c. What are all the possible solutions?
d. What is the best solution?
How to Break the Worry Habit Before It Breaks You
Rule 1 - Crowd worry out of your mind by keeping busy. Plenty of action is one of the best therapies ever devised for curing the "wibber gibbers."
Rule 2 - Don't fuss about trifles. Don't permit little things - the mere termites of life - to ruin your happiness.
Rule 3 - Use the law of averages to outlaw your worries. Ask yourself: "What are the odds against this thing's happening at all?"
Rule 4 - Cooperate with the inevitable. If you know a circumstance is beyond your power to change or revise, say to yourself: "It is so; it cannot be otherwise."
Rule 5 - Put a "stop-loss" order on your worries. Decide just how much anxiety a thing may be worth - and refuse to give it any more.
Rule 6 - Let the past bury its dead. Don't saw sawdust.
Seven Ways to Cultivate a Mental Attitude That Will Bring You Peace and Happiness
Rule 1 - Let's fill our minds with thoughts of peace, courage, health, and hope, for "our life is what our thoughts make of it."
Rule 2 - Let's never try to get even with our enemies, because if we do we will hurt ourselves far more than we hurt them. Let's do as General Eisenhower does: let's never waste a minute thinking about people we don't like.
Rule 3 - A. Instead of worrying about ingratitude, let's expect it. Let's remember that Jesus healed ten lepers in one day - and only one thanked Him. Why should we expect more gratitude than Jesus got?
B. Let's remember that the only way to find happiness is not to expect gratitude - but to give for the joy of giving.
C. Let's remember that gratitude is a "cultivated" trait; so if we want our children to be grateful, we must train them to be grateful.
Rule 4 - Count your blessings - not your troubles!
Rule 5 - Let's not imitate others. Let's find ourselves to be ourselves, for "envy is ignorance" and "imitation is suicide."
Rule 6 - When fate hands us a lemon, let's try to make lemonade.
Rule 7 - Let's forget our own unhappiness - by trying to create a little happiness for others. "When you are good to others, you are the best to yourself."
How to Keep from Worrying about Criticism
Rule 1 - Unjust criticism is often a disguised compliment. It often means that you have aroused jealousy and envy. Remember that no one ever kicks a dead dog.
Rule 2 - Do the very best you can; and then put up your umbrella and keep the rain of criticism from running down the back of your neck.
Rule 3 - Let's keep a record of the fool things we have done and criticize ourselves. Since we can't hope to be perfect, let's do what E. H. Little did: let's ask for unbiased, helpful, constructive criticism.
Six Ways to Prevent Fatigue and Worry and Keep Your Energy and Spirits High
Rule 1 - Rest before you get tired.
Rule 2 - Learn to relax at your work.
Rule 3 - Learn to relax at home.
Rule 4 - Apply these four good working habits:
a. Clear your desk of all papers except those relating to the immediate problem at hand.
b. Do things in the order of their importance.
c. When you face a problem, solve it then and there if you have facts necessary to make a decision.
d. Learn to organize, deputize, and supervise.
Rule 5 - To prevent worry and fatigue, put enthusiasm into your work.
Rule 6 - Remember, no one was ever killed by lack of sleep. It is worrying about insomnia that does the damage - not the insomnia.
Rule 1 - If you want to avoid worry, do what Sir William Osler did" Live in "day-tight compartments." Don't stew about the future. Just live each day until bedtime.
Rule 2 - The next time Trouble - with a Capital T - backs you up in a corner, try the magic formula of Willis H. Carrier:
a. Ask yourself, "What is the worst that can possibly happen if I can't solve my problem?"
b. Prepare yourself mentally to accept the worst - if necessary.
c. Then calmly try to improve upon the worst - which you have already mentally agreed to accept.
Rule 3 - Remind yourself of the exorbitant price you can pay for worry in terms of your health. "Those who do not know how to fight worry die young."
Basic Techniques in Analyzing Worry
Rule 1 - Get the facts. Remember that Dean Hakes of Columbia University said that "half the worry in the world is caused by people trying to make decisions before they have sufficient knowledge on which to base a decision.
Rule 2 - After carefully weighing all the facts, come to a decision.
Rule 3 - Once a decision is carefully reached, act! Get busy carrying out your decision - and dismiss all anxiety about the outcome.
Rule 4 - When you or any of your associates, are tempted to worry about a problem, write out and and answer the following questions:
a. What is the problem?
b. What is the cause of the problem?
c. What are all the possible solutions?
d. What is the best solution?
How to Break the Worry Habit Before It Breaks You
Rule 1 - Crowd worry out of your mind by keeping busy. Plenty of action is one of the best therapies ever devised for curing the "wibber gibbers."
Rule 2 - Don't fuss about trifles. Don't permit little things - the mere termites of life - to ruin your happiness.
Rule 3 - Use the law of averages to outlaw your worries. Ask yourself: "What are the odds against this thing's happening at all?"
Rule 4 - Cooperate with the inevitable. If you know a circumstance is beyond your power to change or revise, say to yourself: "It is so; it cannot be otherwise."
Rule 5 - Put a "stop-loss" order on your worries. Decide just how much anxiety a thing may be worth - and refuse to give it any more.
Rule 6 - Let the past bury its dead. Don't saw sawdust.
Seven Ways to Cultivate a Mental Attitude That Will Bring You Peace and Happiness
Rule 1 - Let's fill our minds with thoughts of peace, courage, health, and hope, for "our life is what our thoughts make of it."
Rule 2 - Let's never try to get even with our enemies, because if we do we will hurt ourselves far more than we hurt them. Let's do as General Eisenhower does: let's never waste a minute thinking about people we don't like.
Rule 3 - A. Instead of worrying about ingratitude, let's expect it. Let's remember that Jesus healed ten lepers in one day - and only one thanked Him. Why should we expect more gratitude than Jesus got?
B. Let's remember that the only way to find happiness is not to expect gratitude - but to give for the joy of giving.
C. Let's remember that gratitude is a "cultivated" trait; so if we want our children to be grateful, we must train them to be grateful.
Rule 4 - Count your blessings - not your troubles!
Rule 5 - Let's not imitate others. Let's find ourselves to be ourselves, for "envy is ignorance" and "imitation is suicide."
Rule 6 - When fate hands us a lemon, let's try to make lemonade.
Rule 7 - Let's forget our own unhappiness - by trying to create a little happiness for others. "When you are good to others, you are the best to yourself."
How to Keep from Worrying about Criticism
Rule 1 - Unjust criticism is often a disguised compliment. It often means that you have aroused jealousy and envy. Remember that no one ever kicks a dead dog.
Rule 2 - Do the very best you can; and then put up your umbrella and keep the rain of criticism from running down the back of your neck.
Rule 3 - Let's keep a record of the fool things we have done and criticize ourselves. Since we can't hope to be perfect, let's do what E. H. Little did: let's ask for unbiased, helpful, constructive criticism.
Six Ways to Prevent Fatigue and Worry and Keep Your Energy and Spirits High
Rule 1 - Rest before you get tired.
Rule 2 - Learn to relax at your work.
Rule 3 - Learn to relax at home.
Rule 4 - Apply these four good working habits:
a. Clear your desk of all papers except those relating to the immediate problem at hand.
b. Do things in the order of their importance.
c. When you face a problem, solve it then and there if you have facts necessary to make a decision.
d. Learn to organize, deputize, and supervise.
Rule 5 - To prevent worry and fatigue, put enthusiasm into your work.
Rule 6 - Remember, no one was ever killed by lack of sleep. It is worrying about insomnia that does the damage - not the insomnia.
February 24, 2007
The advice Carnegie gives is all stuff you've heard before, but he pairs it with compelling stories about people who've taken the worrying to an extreme and who've totally turned their lives around by ditching their angst. Some of my favorite points:
Fatigue comes from stress, not from work.
Becoming wise is a path. As you go, remember that compassionate, considered responses make life more manageable.
Contented life is a choice.
Fatigue comes from stress, not from work.
Becoming wise is a path. As you go, remember that compassionate, considered responses make life more manageable.
Contented life is a choice.
September 27, 2012
I was so blue that I didn't have nice shoes to wear, and it was until I met a man on the wheelchair at the corner of the street. He didn't even have both legs. I helped him buy drink from the vending machine. I asked him if he was upset of sitting on the wheelchair every day. He smiled to me, "I used to be, but not now". "Do you think I can speak?", he asked me. That was a strange question. "We are talking right now", I replied unconsciously. "Do you think I can see you?", he continued. He made me wild with his nonsense question. I was about to shout at him to stop playing these crazy questions with me, but I didn't. "I don't think you are also blind, aren't you?", I talked to him loudly. He suddenly smiled to me. "You see, now I can talk to a handsome boy like you, I can see my beautiful world of love and joy, I can listen to my favorite music, so how lucky you think I am". Chill ran through my spine as soon as I heard these words. "How lucky you are", I repeated.
"What about me? Am I lucky?", I said to myself in my head. I even have my both legs walking on this soft earth. "And then what the hell I'm worried about?"......."Without nice shoes?" I laughed at myself.
He totally changed my life, changed the way I'm thinking and used to think. No matter what happens, I'm still a lucky man on the planet.
Thank you, Dale Carnegie!
"What about me? Am I lucky?", I said to myself in my head. I even have my both legs walking on this soft earth. "And then what the hell I'm worried about?"......."Without nice shoes?" I laughed at myself.
He totally changed my life, changed the way I'm thinking and used to think. No matter what happens, I'm still a lucky man on the planet.
Thank you, Dale Carnegie!
February 6, 2019
This simply wasn't my cup of tea. After the first 2-3 more or less helpful tips, it feels like all we get is a many (many!) stories from individuals, who - through a sudden epiphany - learned how to overcome worry and were cured of various deceases (stomach ulcers were a big favourite) and suddenly led a happy, fulfilled life. At the end of the book, my main impression was not that of a guide through worrying times and of sound advice but of the author hammering home his message of "do not worry! do not worry!" without anything more than anecdotal evidence.
Three other points that did not sit well with me but were surely due to my (and the author's) personal backgrounds:
1) This book was written in the 1930s and it showed. It felt a rather sexist to me at times.
2) The author kept referring to many people that may or may not have been famous at the time. Personally, as a non-American, I only knew about two or three of the "celebrities" he mentioned by name and by whose stories or opinions we should have been inspired. It just did not feel legitimate. Much like I were writing a book and quoting my friends and their anecdotes as "evidence". It's not only dubious but boring.
3) The author's faith. Regardless of whether I believe in God or not, there simply was too much emphasis on how everything will sort itself out if we just believe in and rely on God. "If you're so worried that you've made yourself sick with stomach ulcers and insomnia or even cancer, just stop. Stop worrying and trust in God and everything will sort itself out!" Uh, no. I don't buy it.
It's hard to explain myself here but this may have worked for me if it weren't about a third of the whole book, and been phrased in a more neutral manner.
All that being said, I am aware that this is a self-help book not a physics textbook. Obviously, the evidence is going to be anecdotal but I still wasn't a fan of this.
Three other points that did not sit well with me but were surely due to my (and the author's) personal backgrounds:
1) This book was written in the 1930s and it showed. It felt a rather sexist to me at times.
2) The author kept referring to many people that may or may not have been famous at the time. Personally, as a non-American, I only knew about two or three of the "celebrities" he mentioned by name and by whose stories or opinions we should have been inspired. It just did not feel legitimate. Much like I were writing a book and quoting my friends and their anecdotes as "evidence". It's not only dubious but boring.
3) The author's faith. Regardless of whether I believe in God or not, there simply was too much emphasis on how everything will sort itself out if we just believe in and rely on God. "If you're so worried that you've made yourself sick with stomach ulcers and insomnia or even cancer, just stop. Stop worrying and trust in God and everything will sort itself out!" Uh, no. I don't buy it.
It's hard to explain myself here but this may have worked for me if it weren't about a third of the whole book, and been phrased in a more neutral manner.
All that being said, I am aware that this is a self-help book not a physics textbook. Obviously, the evidence is going to be anecdotal but I still wasn't a fan of this.
April 28, 2011
كتاب رائع بكل ما تحمل الكلمة من معاني
على الرغم من عدم ارتياحي الشخصي لأي محاضرات أو كتب عن التنمية البشرية
إلا أن الكتاب ده حالة خااااااااصة جدا
أولا
الكلام نفسه غاية في الاحترام والاقناع والوسطية
يعني لا بيهون من المشاكل الكبيرة.. ولا بيكبر من الحاجات البسيطة فوق ما تستحق
مش بيتكلم على إنك هتتحول لملاك ما بيهموش المشاكل
لكن بيتكلم بطريقة محترمة ومعتدلة.. بحيث يعرفك إزاي تواجهها بالقدر المناسب بدون ما تقضي على نفسك ولا تدمر حياتك
ثانيا
أغلب المواقف اللي بيعرضها حصلت لمشاهير، يعني أحداث ممكن الوصول لأصلها
مش مجرد واحد عمل.. وواحد أعرفه قال.. وسمعت عن حد راح
ثالثا
الحلول اللي عرضها الكاتب منطقية لحد كبير، بحيث إنها ممكن تنفع مع أغلب الأحوال والمشاكل
غير إنها "عقلانية".. يعني مش على طريقة البس في إيدك أستك تعاقب نفسك بيه.. واشرب بق مية مش عارف إيه والحاجات دي
بالعكس.. بيعرفك إزاي تنظم تفكيرك بشكل كويس بحيث توصل لأقصى حاجة في إيدك إنك تعملها
وبعد كده تسلم أمرك لله، وما تشغلش نفسك باللي مش في إيدك
الطبعة اللي قريتها هي طبعة مكتبة الخانجي، ترجمة عبد المنعم الزيادي
ودي الطبعة اللي رشحهالي بقوة الشخص اللي نصحنا بقراءة الكتاب
ولما قرأتها عرفت السبب
وهي إن فعلا المترجم ما اكتفاش بالترجمة الحرفية للكلام وخلاص.. لكن عمل حاجة ممكن نسميها "ترجمة فنية" بحيث تستمتع بالكلام المكتوب رغم إنه مش باللغة الأصلية للكتابة
حتى في الأشعار والزجل، حاول على قد ما يقدر يخلي ترجمتها فيها شئ من الموسيقى
ف��لا أنصح أي حد يقرأ الكتاب ده بتمعن، ويا ريت لو تكون الترجمة دي نفسها
على الرغم من عدم ارتياحي الشخصي لأي محاضرات أو كتب عن التنمية البشرية
إلا أن الكتاب ده حالة خااااااااصة جدا
أولا
الكلام نفسه غاية في الاحترام والاقناع والوسطية
يعني لا بيهون من المشاكل الكبيرة.. ولا بيكبر من الحاجات البسيطة فوق ما تستحق
مش بيتكلم على إنك هتتحول لملاك ما بيهموش المشاكل
لكن بيتكلم بطريقة محترمة ومعتدلة.. بحيث يعرفك إزاي تواجهها بالقدر المناسب بدون ما تقضي على نفسك ولا تدمر حياتك
ثانيا
أغلب المواقف اللي بيعرضها حصلت لمشاهير، يعني أحداث ممكن الوصول لأصلها
مش مجرد واحد عمل.. وواحد أعرفه قال.. وسمعت عن حد راح
ثالثا
الحلول اللي عرضها الكاتب منطقية لحد كبير، بحيث إنها ممكن تنفع مع أغلب الأحوال والمشاكل
غير إنها "عقلانية".. يعني مش على طريقة البس في إيدك أستك تعاقب نفسك بيه.. واشرب بق مية مش عارف إيه والحاجات دي
بالعكس.. بيعرفك إزاي تنظم تفكيرك بشكل كويس بحيث توصل لأقصى حاجة في إيدك إنك تعملها
وبعد كده تسلم أمرك لله، وما تشغلش نفسك باللي مش في إيدك
الطبعة اللي قريتها هي طبعة مكتبة الخانجي، ترجمة عبد المنعم الزيادي
ودي الطبعة اللي رشحهالي بقوة الشخص اللي نصحنا بقراءة الكتاب
ولما قرأتها عرفت السبب
وهي إن فعلا المترجم ما اكتفاش بالترجمة الحرفية للكلام وخلاص.. لكن عمل حاجة ممكن نسميها "ترجمة فنية" بحيث تستمتع بالكلام المكتوب رغم إنه مش باللغة الأصلية للكتابة
حتى في الأشعار والزجل، حاول على قد ما يقدر يخلي ترجمتها فيها شئ من الموسيقى
ف��لا أنصح أي حد يقرأ الكتاب ده بتمعن، ويا ريت لو تكون الترجمة دي نفسها
September 1, 2014
إن لم تكن قد قرأت هذا الكتاب فضع ما بيديك جانبا و ابدأ قراءته الآن !
كتاب سيغير طريقة تفكيرك للأبد ويجعل الحياة أسهل وأكثر مرونة، ليس عن طريق الكلام الحماسي الذي ينتهي بمجرد الانتهاء من قراءة الكتاب... بل عن طريق التطبيق العملي والممارسة اليومية لمبادئ وأفكار ديل كارنيجي الفعالة.
كتاب سيغير طريقة تفكيرك للأبد ويجعل الحياة أسهل وأكثر مرونة، ليس عن طريق الكلام الحماسي الذي ينتهي بمجرد الانتهاء من قراءة الكتاب... بل عن طريق التطبيق العملي والممارسة اليومية لمبادئ وأفكار ديل كارنيجي الفعالة.
May 12, 2019
Some books are evergreen whenever you turn their pages you will find something new. This book is time tested and paved the way for millions of people to live their life happily.
I love reading Dale Carnegie due to his writing styles. He makes everything quiet and clear. His language is pretty easy and elaboration is lucid and detailed.
The book 'How to stop worrying and start living' is a masterpiece by him. He has shown some practical steps in the way of becoming a person free from fear and non-sense worries. It totally depends on us whether we want to live happily or we want to become sad. Of course, there is a certain step in the process of achieving a worry-free life. But the basics reamins the same all the time. And the author has only reflected those basics in a clear manner.
I love reading Dale Carnegie due to his writing styles. He makes everything quiet and clear. His language is pretty easy and elaboration is lucid and detailed.
The book 'How to stop worrying and start living' is a masterpiece by him. He has shown some practical steps in the way of becoming a person free from fear and non-sense worries. It totally depends on us whether we want to live happily or we want to become sad. Of course, there is a certain step in the process of achieving a worry-free life. But the basics reamins the same all the time. And the author has only reflected those basics in a clear manner.
March 31, 2019
"Remember : today is the tomorrow you worried about yesterday."
Just re-read this fantastic classic over the past few days, and thank goodness I did.
And thank you for your pioneering work, Mr. Carnegie <3
Other quotes :
-----------
“Work creates mental relaxation.”
“It is difficult to worry if you’re doing something that requires planning and thinking.”
“I went from room to room in the house, compiling a lot of jobs to be done. Scores of items needed to be repaired… I am so busy now that I have no time for worry.”
“I am too busy. I have no time for worry.” - Winston Churchill
“Ninety-nine percent of the things I’ve worried about actually never happened.”
“…Lloyds of London has made countless millions of dollars on the tendency of everybody to worry about things that rarely happen… They don’t call it betting, they call it insurance. But it really is betting, based on the law of averages.”
“Before I learned to conquer worry, I lived through 11 years of self-made hell.”
“Those who do not know how to fight worry, die young.”
“I began to place a stop-loss order on every type of annoyance that came to me… on my temper… my regrets… on all my emotional strains.”
“A man is what he thinks about all day long. How could he be anything else?” - Emerson
“I now know with a conviction beyond all doubt that the biggest problem you and I have to deal with - in fact almost the only problem we have to deal with - is choosing the right thoughts.”
“An angry man is full of poison.” - Confucius
“It is natural for people to forget to be grateful… Instead of worrying about ingratitude, let’s expect it. Let’s remember that Jesus healed 10 lepers in one day, and only 1 thanked him. Why should we expect more gratitude then Jesus got ?”
“I saw a man who had no legs… He greeted me with a fine smile… If he can be cheerful, happy, and confident without legs, I certainly can with legs… Why don’t you stop right now and ask yourself ‘What in the hell am I worrying about?’ You will probably find that it is comparatively unimportant and insignificant.”
“Always be yourself… Nobody is so miserable as he who longs to be somebody other than the person he is in body and mind.”
“You and I have such abilities, so let’s stop worrying that we are not like others. You are something new in this world. Never before since the beginning of time has there ever been anybody exactly like you, and never again for all the ages to come will there be anybody exactly like you ever again.”
“Men do not die from overwork. They die from dissipation and worry. … from dissipation of their energies and worry because they never seem to get their work done.”
“The first requisite for a good night’s sleep is a feeling of security. We need to feel that some power, greater than ourselves, will take care of us until morning… One of the best sleep producing agents which my years of practice have revealed to me is prayer. I say this purely as a medical man.”
“Talk to your body.”
“Rest before you get tired.”
“To prevent worry and fatigue, put enthusiasm into your work.”
"I only know that today, 17 years after leaving the Sahara, I still maintain that happy resignation to the inevitable... When the fierce burning winds take control of our lives and we cannot prevent them, let us accept the inevitable, and then get busy and pick up the pieces."
"...I live every day now as if it's the first day I would have ever seen, and the last I were going to see. I am excited about the daily adventure of living, and nobody in a state of excitement will be unduly troubled by worries... One of the chief reasons for success in life is enthusiasm."
"...When I was terribly depressed, I forced myself to become physically active almost every hour of the day... I'm a great believer in working up a tremendous sweat. I found that depression and worry oozed out of my system this way."
"Two months from now, I shall not be worrying about this, so why worry about it now? Why not assume now the same attitude I will have 2 months from now?"
"...I have lived; they only existed.... I know things they will never know. It is only the women whose eyes have been washed clear with tears who get the broad vision that makes them little sisters to all the world.... I have acquired a sense of humor... when a woman can joke over troubles instead of be in hysterics, nothing much can ever hurt her again." - Dorothy Dix
.
Just re-read this fantastic classic over the past few days, and thank goodness I did.
And thank you for your pioneering work, Mr. Carnegie <3
Other quotes :
-----------
“Work creates mental relaxation.”
“It is difficult to worry if you’re doing something that requires planning and thinking.”
“I went from room to room in the house, compiling a lot of jobs to be done. Scores of items needed to be repaired… I am so busy now that I have no time for worry.”
“I am too busy. I have no time for worry.” - Winston Churchill
“Ninety-nine percent of the things I’ve worried about actually never happened.”
“…Lloyds of London has made countless millions of dollars on the tendency of everybody to worry about things that rarely happen… They don’t call it betting, they call it insurance. But it really is betting, based on the law of averages.”
“Before I learned to conquer worry, I lived through 11 years of self-made hell.”
“Those who do not know how to fight worry, die young.”
“I began to place a stop-loss order on every type of annoyance that came to me… on my temper… my regrets… on all my emotional strains.”
“A man is what he thinks about all day long. How could he be anything else?” - Emerson
“I now know with a conviction beyond all doubt that the biggest problem you and I have to deal with - in fact almost the only problem we have to deal with - is choosing the right thoughts.”
“An angry man is full of poison.” - Confucius
“It is natural for people to forget to be grateful… Instead of worrying about ingratitude, let’s expect it. Let’s remember that Jesus healed 10 lepers in one day, and only 1 thanked him. Why should we expect more gratitude then Jesus got ?”
“I saw a man who had no legs… He greeted me with a fine smile… If he can be cheerful, happy, and confident without legs, I certainly can with legs… Why don’t you stop right now and ask yourself ‘What in the hell am I worrying about?’ You will probably find that it is comparatively unimportant and insignificant.”
“Always be yourself… Nobody is so miserable as he who longs to be somebody other than the person he is in body and mind.”
“You and I have such abilities, so let’s stop worrying that we are not like others. You are something new in this world. Never before since the beginning of time has there ever been anybody exactly like you, and never again for all the ages to come will there be anybody exactly like you ever again.”
“Men do not die from overwork. They die from dissipation and worry. … from dissipation of their energies and worry because they never seem to get their work done.”
“The first requisite for a good night’s sleep is a feeling of security. We need to feel that some power, greater than ourselves, will take care of us until morning… One of the best sleep producing agents which my years of practice have revealed to me is prayer. I say this purely as a medical man.”
“Talk to your body.”
“Rest before you get tired.”
“To prevent worry and fatigue, put enthusiasm into your work.”
"I only know that today, 17 years after leaving the Sahara, I still maintain that happy resignation to the inevitable... When the fierce burning winds take control of our lives and we cannot prevent them, let us accept the inevitable, and then get busy and pick up the pieces."
"...I live every day now as if it's the first day I would have ever seen, and the last I were going to see. I am excited about the daily adventure of living, and nobody in a state of excitement will be unduly troubled by worries... One of the chief reasons for success in life is enthusiasm."
"...When I was terribly depressed, I forced myself to become physically active almost every hour of the day... I'm a great believer in working up a tremendous sweat. I found that depression and worry oozed out of my system this way."
"Two months from now, I shall not be worrying about this, so why worry about it now? Why not assume now the same attitude I will have 2 months from now?"
"...I have lived; they only existed.... I know things they will never know. It is only the women whose eyes have been washed clear with tears who get the broad vision that makes them little sisters to all the world.... I have acquired a sense of humor... when a woman can joke over troubles instead of be in hysterics, nothing much can ever hurt her again." - Dorothy Dix
.
January 26, 2021
1.5 stars
Religious bigotry and preaching disguised as psychology, with some useful information mixed in. Full review to come.
Religious bigotry and preaching disguised as psychology, with some useful information mixed in. Full review to come.
August 13, 2011
Wow this book is really good and deserves to be read a few times over your lifetime. The best thing about it is that it can be downloaded free legally since it is so old now that the copyright laws do not apply to it (or something) all you have to do is search for it on Google with something like "How to stop worrying and start living filetype pdf" and its yours to bind or read on a computer. Even if you feel that you do not need to worry you should pick up this book and keep it on the top of your list of things to read because the insights that Dale gives on life are just priceless take for example you are really tired after work even though your work is not demanding - the reason you are probably tired is that you feel your job is boring or you don't like what you do having a job like this will get you more wasted then doing a job that is physically and mentally demanding. The book is full of great insights like this and ways to combat stress I am going to read it again now. If you have not read it then please go get it i can not recommend it enough
May 29, 2018
أحد أشهر كتب التنمية الذاتية، وربما الكتاب الأصل الذي أخذت منه كتب التنمية الذاتية الكثير فيما بعد
أعجبني أسلوب الكاتب المنظم والقصص التي عرضها بالاضافة إلى العديد من النصائح العملية التي يقدمها للقراء
أعجبني أسلوب الكاتب المنظم والقصص التي عرضها بالاضافة إلى العديد من النصائح العملية التي يقدمها للقراء
May 17, 2020
Yesterday is dead and tommorow is unborn - so do not worry about them. Instead, focus only on what you can do today!
Cam asta e ideea. :)
Un clasic, nu? Și o carte pe cât de simplă, pe atât de importantă, mai ales pentru vremurile pe care le trăim. Practic, grijile pe care ni le facem în fiecare zi ne omoară, fraților. Iar nenea Carnegie explică în stilul său ușor de înțeles cum putem scăpa în mare măsură de stres, pentru a ne putea bucura de viață. Citind cartea, mi-am dat seama de ce unii oameni pur și simplu fug de joburi care presupun răspundere. Îi invidiez, pentru că sunt conștienți că responsabilitatea înseamnă stres, iar stresul dăunează. Vorbesc din proprie experiență. La ultimul control medical, mi s-a găsit un lob al ficatului de trei ori mai are decât celălalt. Lucrurile erau mult mai nasoale acum trei ani. Nu am fumat niciodată, nu mai beau de trei ani, am o alimentație bazată pe plante, fac sport aproape zilnic, am slăbit 35 de kilograme în ultimii 5 ani. Cu toate astea, nu e de ajuns. Pentru că stresul - presupus de livrarea zilnică a unei emisiuni tv, plus asigurarea resurselor financiare pentru atâtea familii care depind de făbricuța asta, Starea nației - este enorm. Iar eu sunt tipul care se consumă din orice, care pune la suflet, care reacționează imediat, de multe ori impulsiv. Eram, mai bine zis, pentru că de când citesc și învăț atât de mult am reușit să schimb radical abordarea. La cartea lui Carnegie am revenit săptămâna trecută, căutând bibliografie pentru cartea despre un stil de viață sănătos, la care lucrez împreună cu a mea colegă, Alexandra Corbu. Și sunt acolo câteva sfaturi excelente. Vă dau doar câteva.
Confuzia dă naștere grijilor. Așa că e bine să afli ce anume nu ți-e clar și să rezolvi problema. Știți, da? Situațiile pe care le tot amânați și la a căror rezolvare vă gândiți zilnic, dar nu faceți nimic? Astea ne distrug încet, dar sigur. Înfruntați-le pur și simplu, spune autorul. Sigur, ușor de zis, ceva mai greu de făcut, nu?
Trăiește azi, ține departe de mintea ta grijile de ieri și pe cele de mâine. Sigur, pare o prostie, dar nu e. Ideea e că amânăm tot timpul viața, fraților, nu credeți? Muncim ca sclavii, ne facem o familie, credit, casă, copii, nu neapărat în ordinea asta, și tragem tare pentru ce? Pentru ce-o să fie la pensia pe care n-o apucăm oricum? Gândiți-vă la asta, pe mine m-a făcut să vreau să trăiesc și să mă bucur de fiecare azi.
Încă una și gata: fii mai fericit concentrându-te pe părțile pozitive ale vieții și fiind bucuros. Sigur că asta nu înseamnă să râzi ca boul indiferent ce se întâmplă, dar nu vă puteți închipui cât de mult ajută o setare pozitivă a minții.
Cam asta e ideea. :)
Un clasic, nu? Și o carte pe cât de simplă, pe atât de importantă, mai ales pentru vremurile pe care le trăim. Practic, grijile pe care ni le facem în fiecare zi ne omoară, fraților. Iar nenea Carnegie explică în stilul său ușor de înțeles cum putem scăpa în mare măsură de stres, pentru a ne putea bucura de viață. Citind cartea, mi-am dat seama de ce unii oameni pur și simplu fug de joburi care presupun răspundere. Îi invidiez, pentru că sunt conștienți că responsabilitatea înseamnă stres, iar stresul dăunează. Vorbesc din proprie experiență. La ultimul control medical, mi s-a găsit un lob al ficatului de trei ori mai are decât celălalt. Lucrurile erau mult mai nasoale acum trei ani. Nu am fumat niciodată, nu mai beau de trei ani, am o alimentație bazată pe plante, fac sport aproape zilnic, am slăbit 35 de kilograme în ultimii 5 ani. Cu toate astea, nu e de ajuns. Pentru că stresul - presupus de livrarea zilnică a unei emisiuni tv, plus asigurarea resurselor financiare pentru atâtea familii care depind de făbricuța asta, Starea nației - este enorm. Iar eu sunt tipul care se consumă din orice, care pune la suflet, care reacționează imediat, de multe ori impulsiv. Eram, mai bine zis, pentru că de când citesc și învăț atât de mult am reușit să schimb radical abordarea. La cartea lui Carnegie am revenit săptămâna trecută, căutând bibliografie pentru cartea despre un stil de viață sănătos, la care lucrez împreună cu a mea colegă, Alexandra Corbu. Și sunt acolo câteva sfaturi excelente. Vă dau doar câteva.
Confuzia dă naștere grijilor. Așa că e bine să afli ce anume nu ți-e clar și să rezolvi problema. Știți, da? Situațiile pe care le tot amânați și la a căror rezolvare vă gândiți zilnic, dar nu faceți nimic? Astea ne distrug încet, dar sigur. Înfruntați-le pur și simplu, spune autorul. Sigur, ușor de zis, ceva mai greu de făcut, nu?
Trăiește azi, ține departe de mintea ta grijile de ieri și pe cele de mâine. Sigur, pare o prostie, dar nu e. Ideea e că amânăm tot timpul viața, fraților, nu credeți? Muncim ca sclavii, ne facem o familie, credit, casă, copii, nu neapărat în ordinea asta, și tragem tare pentru ce? Pentru ce-o să fie la pensia pe care n-o apucăm oricum? Gândiți-vă la asta, pe mine m-a făcut să vreau să trăiesc și să mă bucur de fiecare azi.
Încă una și gata: fii mai fericit concentrându-te pe părțile pozitive ale vieții și fiind bucuros. Sigur că asta nu înseamnă să râzi ca boul indiferent ce se întâmplă, dar nu vă puteți închipui cât de mult ajută o setare pozitivă a minții.
June 14, 2021
Many people sneer at self help books, but I credit Dale Carnegie's How to Stop Worrying and Start Living with being one of several books that helped me to understand and control the anxiety and panic disorder that also plagued most of the members of my family. Fear is often born from "not understanding," so I made sure to examine my fears before I gave into them.
I agree that mental health issues need to be addressed with proper medical assessment and intervention, where required, but Carnegie's books were the stepping stones that helped me take charge of my life, get a good education and then decide what I wanted to do with that education. I started to take the conventional path, but at one point, I realized that keeping up with the Joneses was not making me happy, so I made some radical lifestyle changes. We don't need as much as we want, and our possessions start to own us after a while. Always good to keep that in mind!
August 31, 2025
From today's perspective, Carnegie's advice might seem too simple compared to the "sophisticated" fixes people chase: unsustainable habit tracking, alien-looking daily planners, eating exactly 423 calories and 17 grams of protein, goat yoga for brain chemistry, or posting your penis stats on X (ahem, Bryan Johnson).
Jokes aside, while contemporary research and practices have their merit, what's refreshing about Carnegie's book is how he reminds us of simple, timeless habits we often know but forget. Don't be fooled by its age--while some parts are outdated (including sexist remarks), most of it remains relevant.
Many of his points are now widely recycled on social media, so here you get them in one place. Choose one source, like this book, and just do it. Really, it's that simple, and this is only one of many insights he offers. He urges us to be proactive instead of reactive in decision-making, rather than acting like beasts led only by sensory stimuli.
Carnegie also touches on the mind/body complex, sleep hygiene, good regular sex for a successful relationship, physical activity, to clean your room (relax, he's not talking about Peterson), what we'd now call writing therapy, filling your heart with functional emotions, gratitude, and plenty of quotable nuggets for dealing with worry. If nothing else, for anyone grappling with the everyday anxieties of modern life, it's a solid starting point to tackle the "shit-life syndrome."
He also references philosophical musings from Epictetus, Aristotle, and Plato, as well as teachings from Alfred Adler. What's equally interesting is that, being an older book, it includes anecdotes of key figures such as presidents and senators during the World Wars, delegates at the Paris Conference, and even the famous Lawrence of Arabia.
That said, it's worth noting the book is largely aimed at people with first-world problems. Much of his advice is less applicable in situations where living conditions are unfavorable or dire, communities unsafe, or families dysfunctional.
Jokes aside, while contemporary research and practices have their merit, what's refreshing about Carnegie's book is how he reminds us of simple, timeless habits we often know but forget. Don't be fooled by its age--while some parts are outdated (including sexist remarks), most of it remains relevant.
Many of his points are now widely recycled on social media, so here you get them in one place. Choose one source, like this book, and just do it. Really, it's that simple, and this is only one of many insights he offers. He urges us to be proactive instead of reactive in decision-making, rather than acting like beasts led only by sensory stimuli.
Carnegie also touches on the mind/body complex, sleep hygiene, good regular sex for a successful relationship, physical activity, to clean your room (relax, he's not talking about Peterson), what we'd now call writing therapy, filling your heart with functional emotions, gratitude, and plenty of quotable nuggets for dealing with worry. If nothing else, for anyone grappling with the everyday anxieties of modern life, it's a solid starting point to tackle the "shit-life syndrome."
He also references philosophical musings from Epictetus, Aristotle, and Plato, as well as teachings from Alfred Adler. What's equally interesting is that, being an older book, it includes anecdotes of key figures such as presidents and senators during the World Wars, delegates at the Paris Conference, and even the famous Lawrence of Arabia.
That said, it's worth noting the book is largely aimed at people with first-world problems. Much of his advice is less applicable in situations where living conditions are unfavorable or dire, communities unsafe, or families dysfunctional.
June 25, 2012
- Advice - live in day-tight compartments.
- Imagine the worst, accept it, and try to improve upon it. Then you have nothing to lose and everything to gain.
- Get the facts, analyze them, arrive at a decision, and act on the decision. You worry more when you don't know
- what is the problem? What is the cause? What are all possible solutions? What solution do you suggest?
- being busy leaves no time for worry
- don't be bothered by the little things
- cooperate with the inevitable. Bend like the willow; don't resist like the oak
- when we change our actions, we change the feeling. Act happy even if you're not.
- You don't attract what you want, but you attract what you are
- Don't expect others to be grateful. Give for the inner joy of giving. To raise grateful children, we have to be grateful.
- quote by John Baillie - "What makes a man a Christian is neither his intellectual acceptance of certain ideas, nor his conformity to a certain rule, but his possession of a certain Spirit, and hsi participation in a certain Life."
- no one ever kicks a dead dog - if you're kicked and criticized, it means you are accomplishing something and are worthy of attention.
- people aren't thinking about you. They're thinking about themselves
- take naps.
- relax your eyes
- do things in the order of importance.
- clear desk of everything not related to the immediate problem at hand.
- don't put off decisions
- Imagine the worst, accept it, and try to improve upon it. Then you have nothing to lose and everything to gain.
- Get the facts, analyze them, arrive at a decision, and act on the decision. You worry more when you don't know
- what is the problem? What is the cause? What are all possible solutions? What solution do you suggest?
- being busy leaves no time for worry
- don't be bothered by the little things
- cooperate with the inevitable. Bend like the willow; don't resist like the oak
- when we change our actions, we change the feeling. Act happy even if you're not.
- You don't attract what you want, but you attract what you are
- Don't expect others to be grateful. Give for the inner joy of giving. To raise grateful children, we have to be grateful.
- quote by John Baillie - "What makes a man a Christian is neither his intellectual acceptance of certain ideas, nor his conformity to a certain rule, but his possession of a certain Spirit, and hsi participation in a certain Life."
- no one ever kicks a dead dog - if you're kicked and criticized, it means you are accomplishing something and are worthy of attention.
- people aren't thinking about you. They're thinking about themselves
- take naps.
- relax your eyes
- do things in the order of importance.
- clear desk of everything not related to the immediate problem at hand.
- don't put off decisions
August 5, 2022
খুব পুরোনোপন্থী ভঙ্গিতে লেখা একটা বই। আজকালকার "মনোবিজ্ঞানসম্মত" স্মার্ট সেল্ফ-হেল্প বইয়ের সমুদ্রে এই বইটার তলিয়ে যাবার কথা। কিন্তু আমার কাছে তলিয়ে যায়নি। এই তো কয়েকদিন আগে আমার কোভিড হয়েছিলো। সন্ধ্যেবেলা মাথাব্যথা করছিলো বেশ। একটা মাথাব্যথার ট্যাবলেট খেলে কমে যেতো হয়তো। ট্যাবলেটের বদলে, মা যখন কপালে হাত বুলিয়ে দিচ্ছিলো, মাথাব্যথা কি উধাও হয়ে গেছিলো? না, যায় নি। কিন্তু একটা মানসিক উপশম হয়েছিলো। মনে হয়েছিলো, ব্যথাটা সহ্য করে নিতে পারি। এই বইটা বহুবার আমাকে সেই মানসিক উপশম দিয়েছে।
জীবনে অবশ্যম্ভাবীভাবে মাঝেমাঝে বেকায়দায় পড়ে যাই আমরা। নিজেকে অসহায় মনে হয়। কিংবা হয়তো, উটকো অতিথির মতো, দুঃখ এসে জাপটে ধরে। বলে, "কী বে? সব খবর ভালো তো? অনেকদিন তোর সঙ্গে দেখাসাক্ষাৎ নেই।" আরো কতরকম কতকিছু। আমি তো বইকেই সবসময় বন্ধু হিসেবে মেনে এসেছি। নতুন চাকরি পেয়ে বই কিনেছি। প্রেম ভেঙে যাবার পরে বই কিনেছি। বেড়াতে যাবার ট্রেনের টিকিট কেটে ফেলার আনন্দে বই কিনেছি। ফুটবল খেলতে গিয়ে ঠ্যাং ভেঙে যাবার কারণে, বেড়াতে যাওয়া ক্যানসেল করতে হয়েছে, তখন পায়ে প্ল্যাস্টার বাঁধা অবস্থায়, আর কী করবো? বাড়ি থেকে অর্ডার দিয়ে সেই বইই কিনেছি!
অনেকবছর আগে, আমার কলেজজীবনে, চেন্নাইয়ের একটা ফুটপাথ থেকে এই বইটা কিনেছিলাম। সন্ধ্যা নামছিলো। জোয়ারের মতো মানুষের ঢল নেমেছিল চারিদিকে। কিন্তু নিজেকে একদম একা মনে হচ্ছিলো। একটা বিশেষ কারণে দুশ্চিন্তা কুরে কুরে খাচ্ছিলো আমাকে। দুশ্চিন্তা আর ভয়। রাস্তার অল্প আলোয় এই বইটার দিকে হঠাৎ নজর যায়। হোস্টেলে ফিরে এসে অনেকক্ষণ বইটা পড়লাম। ব্যাস, পরদিন সকালেই আমার বিপদ কেটে গ্যালো? দুশ্চিন্তা গায়েব হয়ে গ্যালো? আমি মিলখা সিংয়ের মতো দৌড়তে আরম্ভ করলাম? নাহ, এসব কিছুই হয়নি। নিজের সঙ্গে মানসিক যুদ্ধ করে, পরিস্থিতির সঙ্গে লড়াই করে, অনেক ঝামেলার পরে, সেই বিপদ থেকে মুক্তি পেয়েছিলাম।
এই বইটা, তার অনেক হাস্যকর পরামর্শ দিয়ে, পুরোনো দিনের মানুষদের মতো "সবজান্তা" পরামর্শ দিয়ে, বস্তাপচা পরামর্শ দিয়ে, এবং প্রচুর দরকারি পরামর্শ দিয়ে, তারপর থেকে আমার পাশেপাশে থেকেছে। অনেক মনখারাপের রাতে, দুশ্চিন্তার দুপুরে, একাকী সন্ধ্যেবেলা, নিদ্রাহীন ভোরবেলা, আমাকে মনে করিয়ে দিয়েছে, যা ঘটছে তার থেকে বেরিয়ে আসবার উপায় আমার হাতেই রয়েছে। আর কেউ নয়, আমাকেই দাঁড়াতে হবে নিজের পাশে। যদি হাল ভেঙে যায়, আমাকেই মেরামত করতে হবে। ডুবে গেলে ভেসে উঠতে হবে। আমাকেই। কিংবা, কোনো পরিস্থিতিকে মেনে নিয়ে বলতে হবে, আর নয়। অনেক হয়েছে, এবার থেমে যেতে হবে। এবার রাস্তা বদল করতে হবে!
এই বইটার কাছে আমার অনেক ঋণ জমে আছে। অনেকের কাছে বইটা হাসির খোরাক হলেও, যখনই ডেকেছি, আমার পাশে দাঁড়িয়েছে। আমাদের অনেক বিচ্যুতি সত্ত্বেও কিছু মানুষ যেমন আমাদের ছেড়ে যায়না, এই বইটাও আমাকে ছেড়ে যায়নি।
জীবনে অবশ্যম্ভাবীভাবে মাঝেমাঝে বেকায়দায় পড়ে যাই আমরা। নিজেকে অসহায় মনে হয়। কিংবা হয়তো, উটকো অতিথির মতো, দুঃখ এসে জাপটে ধরে। বলে, "কী বে? সব খবর ভালো তো? অনেকদিন তোর সঙ্গে দেখাসাক্ষাৎ নেই।" আরো কতরকম কতকিছু। আমি তো বইকেই সবসময় বন্ধু হিসেবে মেনে এসেছি। নতুন চাকরি পেয়ে বই কিনেছি। প্রেম ভেঙে যাবার পরে বই কিনেছি। বেড়াতে যাবার ট্রেনের টিকিট কেটে ফেলার আনন্দে বই কিনেছি। ফুটবল খেলতে গিয়ে ঠ্যাং ভেঙে যাবার কারণে, বেড়াতে যাওয়া ক্যানসেল করতে হয়েছে, তখন পায়ে প্ল্যাস্টার বাঁধা অবস্থায়, আর কী করবো? বাড়ি থেকে অর্ডার দিয়ে সেই বইই কিনেছি!
অনেকবছর আগে, আমার কলেজজীবনে, চেন্নাইয়ের একটা ফুটপাথ থেকে এই বইটা কিনেছিলাম। সন্ধ্যা নামছিলো। জোয়ারের মতো মানুষের ঢল নেমেছিল চারিদিকে। কিন্তু নিজেকে একদম একা মনে হচ্ছিলো। একটা বিশেষ কারণে দুশ্চিন্তা কুরে কুরে খাচ্ছিলো আমাকে। দুশ্চিন্তা আর ভয়। রাস্তার অল্প আলোয় এই বইটার দিকে হঠাৎ নজর যায়। হোস্টেলে ফিরে এসে অনেকক্ষণ বইটা পড়লাম। ব্যাস, পরদিন সকালেই আমার বিপদ কেটে গ্যালো? দুশ্চিন্তা গায়েব হয়ে গ্যালো? আমি মিলখা সিংয়ের মতো দৌড়তে আরম্ভ করলাম? নাহ, এসব কিছুই হয়নি। নিজের সঙ্গে মানসিক যুদ্ধ করে, পরিস্থিতির সঙ্গে লড়াই করে, অনেক ঝামেলার পরে, সেই বিপদ থেকে মুক্তি পেয়েছিলাম।
এই বইটা, তার অনেক হাস্যকর পরামর্শ দিয়ে, পুরোনো দিনের মানুষদের মতো "সবজান্তা" পরামর্শ দিয়ে, বস্তাপচা পরামর্শ দিয়ে, এবং প্রচুর দরকারি পরামর্শ দিয়ে, তারপর থেকে আমার পাশেপাশে থেকেছে। অনেক মনখারাপের রাতে, দুশ্চিন্তার দুপুরে, একাকী সন্ধ্যেবেলা, নিদ্রাহীন ভোরবেলা, আমাকে মনে করিয়ে দিয়েছে, যা ঘটছে তার থেকে বেরিয়ে আসবার উপায় আমার হাতেই রয়েছে। আর কেউ নয়, আমাকেই দাঁড়াতে হবে নিজের পাশে। যদি হাল ভেঙে যায়, আমাকেই মেরামত করতে হবে। ডুবে গেলে ভেসে উঠতে হবে। আমাকেই। কিংবা, কোনো পরিস্থিতিকে মেনে নিয়ে বলতে হবে, আর নয়। অনেক হয়েছে, এবার থেমে যেতে হবে। এবার রাস্তা বদল করতে হবে!
এই বইটার কাছে আমার অনেক ঋণ জমে আছে। অনেকের কাছে বইটা হাসির খোরাক হলেও, যখনই ডেকেছি, আমার পাশে দাঁড়িয়েছে। আমাদের অনেক বিচ্যুতি সত্ত্বেও কিছু মানুষ যেমন আমাদের ছেড়ে যায়না, এই বইটাও আমাকে ছেড়ে যায়নি।
For every ailment under the sun
There is a remedy, or there is none.
If there be one, try to find it,
If there is none, never mind it!
July 8, 2020
What a terrible book. 5% of it is good advice, 45% is destructive (get rid of your worries by drowning yourself in work) and has aged badly over the seven decades since it was written. The worst part is yet to come though. The leftover parts of this book promote a universal solution to getting over worrying - Jesus.
This book deserves to be taken off the shelves of bookstores and not by customers.
This book deserves to be taken off the shelves of bookstores and not by customers.
July 24, 2011
كتاب ( دع القلق وابدأ الحياة ) لـ(ديل كارنيجي )
قيمت هذا الكتاب بأربعة نجوم من أصل خمسة ... لأنه رائع ... يستحق القراءة بلا شك ... وأنصح كل إنسان بقرائته مرة ومرتين وأكثر ... والاحتفاظ بنسخة ورقية منه يضعها بمتناول يده على الدوام
أجمل ما في الكتاب أنه يبتعد عن الخيالية والمثالية المطلقة ... فهو يعتمد دائما على القصص الواقعية الموثقة بالأسماء والأمكنة ... القصص التي سردها الكاتب مذهلة في كثير من الأحيان ... تستغرب من وجود أشخاص استطاعوا مواجهة مشكلاتهم بهذه القوة وبذلك الثبات ... وبكل تلك الشجاعة
تستغرب من أشخاص نهضوا من القاع ورفضوا الاستسلام للكوارث التي داهمت حياتهم
يؤلمني أنني كلما قرأت أكثر واطلعت أكثر أجد دائماً أن جميع الذين بلغوا المجد والعظمة واجهوا مصاعب لا يطيقها الكثيرون ... وكأن مفتاح الدخول إلى عالم العظماء هو امتحان يشيب له شعر الرأس ويفتك بالضعفاء ... وكأنك عند موقف معين ستضطر الاختيار بين مواجهة العاصفة او الاستسلام للغرق
خسر الكتاب نجمة واحدة لسببين اثنين :
1- لأن الكتاب بمثابة السلاح الذي يفيدنا بلا شك في مواجهة الحياة والقلق ... ولكن دائماً وكما في جميع كتب التنمية البشرية نحتاج قبل الاستفادة منها إلى اتخاذ قرار حاسم بتغيير حياتنا والبدء من جديد ... هذا القرار الذي لا يملك جميعنا الجرأة على اتخاذه ... الكتاب يعطيك دليلاً رائعاً لتحيا بسعادة ولا شك بأن إذا طبقت 50% من المبادئ التي سردها ( ديل كارنيجي ) فإنك ستحيا بسعادة وسلام ... ولكن !!
ألا يعرف الكثيرون منا الصواب والخطأ ... ومع ذلك نسير في كثير من الأحياة بطريق الخطأ ونترك الصواب
لماذا ؟!؟ ربما هي فطرة البشر ... ربما هو ضعفنا ... ربما نحتاج لتلك الكارثة والمحنة التي مر بها أغلب أبطال الكتاب لنتخذ قراراً بتغيير حياتنا بعد أن نكون قد فقدنا كل شيء
2- الانتقاد الثاني للكتاب ربما لا يراه الجميع منطقيا وخصوصاً ان الكاتب أمريكي مسيحي ... ولكنني أجد أن الكتاب خسر كثيراً لأنه لم يستفد من مبادئ الإسلام ... ولعل القصة التي سردها في نهاية الكتاب عن ذلك الرجل الذي عاش مع عرب الصحراء المؤمنين بالقضاء والقدر دليل على كلامي .... نحن نؤمن بالقضاء والقدر ... بل نؤمن بأكثر من ذلك ... نؤمن بأن ما نراه شراً قد يكون خيراً من حيث لا ندري ... ولو أننا جميعاً فهمنا هذا المعنى وانطلقنا به في حياتنا لما استطاعت نوائب الدنيا مجتمعة أن تقف في طريقنا ... ولكن أعود فأقول ... كثيراً ما نعرف سبيل الحق والحقيقية ولكننا نرفض السير فيه ... عناد الإنسان ورعونته وجهله ... ولا شيء غير ذلك ... هو سبب قلقنا وحزننا وكآبتنا
في النهاية أعود فأقول ... الكتاب رائع ... قرأته الكترونيا وسأبحث عنه في المكتبات لأقتنيه ... لأنه كنز معرفي بلا شك
قيمت هذا الكتاب بأربعة نجوم من أصل خمسة ... لأنه رائع ... يستحق القراءة بلا شك ... وأنصح كل إنسان بقرائته مرة ومرتين وأكثر ... والاحتفاظ بنسخة ورقية منه يضعها بمتناول يده على الدوام
أجمل ما في الكتاب أنه يبتعد عن الخيالية والمثالية المطلقة ... فهو يعتمد دائما على القصص الواقعية الموثقة بالأسماء والأمكنة ... القصص التي سردها الكاتب مذهلة في كثير من الأحيان ... تستغرب من وجود أشخاص استطاعوا مواجهة مشكلاتهم بهذه القوة وبذلك الثبات ... وبكل تلك الشجاعة
تستغرب من أشخاص نهضوا من القاع ورفضوا الاستسلام للكوارث التي داهمت حياتهم
يؤلمني أنني كلما قرأت أكثر واطلعت أكثر أجد دائماً أن جميع الذين بلغوا المجد والعظمة واجهوا مصاعب لا يطيقها الكثيرون ... وكأن مفتاح الدخول إلى عالم العظماء هو امتحان يشيب له شعر الرأس ويفتك بالضعفاء ... وكأنك عند موقف معين ستضطر الاختيار بين مواجهة العاصفة او الاستسلام للغرق
خسر الكتاب نجمة واحدة لسببين اثنين :
1- لأن الكتاب بمثابة السلاح الذي يفيدنا بلا شك في مواجهة الحياة والقلق ... ولكن دائماً وكما في جميع كتب التنمية البشرية نحتاج قبل الاستفادة منها إلى اتخاذ قرار حاسم بتغيير حياتنا والبدء من جديد ... هذا القرار الذي لا يملك جميعنا الجرأة على اتخاذه ... الكتاب يعطيك دليلاً رائعاً لتحيا بسعادة ولا شك بأن إذا طبقت 50% من المبادئ التي سردها ( ديل كارنيجي ) فإنك ستحيا بسعادة وسلام ... ولكن !!
ألا يعرف الكثيرون منا الصواب والخطأ ... ومع ذلك نسير في كثير من الأحياة بطريق الخطأ ونترك الصواب
لماذا ؟!؟ ربما هي فطرة البشر ... ربما هو ضعفنا ... ربما نحتاج لتلك الكارثة والمحنة التي مر بها أغلب أبطال الكتاب لنتخذ قراراً بتغيير حياتنا بعد أن نكون قد فقدنا كل شيء
2- الانتقاد الثاني للكتاب ربما لا يراه الجميع منطقيا وخصوصاً ان الكاتب أمريكي مسيحي ... ولكنني أجد أن الكتاب خسر كثيراً لأنه لم يستفد من مبادئ الإسلام ... ولعل القصة التي سردها في نهاية الكتاب عن ذلك الرجل الذي عاش مع عرب الصحراء المؤمنين بالقضاء والقدر دليل على كلامي .... نحن نؤمن بالقضاء والقدر ... بل نؤمن بأكثر من ذلك ... نؤمن بأن ما نراه شراً قد يكون خيراً من حيث لا ندري ... ولو أننا جميعاً فهمنا هذا المعنى وانطلقنا به في حياتنا لما استطاعت نوائب الدنيا مجتمعة أن تقف في طريقنا ... ولكن أعود فأقول ... كثيراً ما نعرف سبيل الحق والحقيقية ولكننا نرفض السير فيه ... عناد الإنسان ورعونته وجهله ... ولا شيء غير ذلك ... هو سبب قلقنا وحزننا وكآبتنا
في النهاية أعود فأقول ... الكتاب رائع ... قرأته الكترونيا وسأبحث عنه في المكتبات لأقتنيه ... لأنه كنز معرفي بلا شك
November 26, 2015
This "holy" book contains tremendously effective, practical and scientific-based solutions to overcome stress and a state of being worry for different scenarios that might happen for a person. A marvelous, must-read book for everyone.
This book is among the very most valuable gifts you could give to a friend or family member.
This book is among the very most valuable gifts you could give to a friend or family member.
May 17, 2017
This was such a frustrating book to read.
1. Carnegie relies very heavily on anecdotal evidence. I usually like that in self-improvement books, provided that the author also includes scientific evidence to back it all up. Carnegie does not. Furthermore, a number of the examples he uses are unconvincing at best. I mean, being diagnosed with incurable illness/paralysis but being instantaneously healed through the power of Jesus and some cheerfulness? Sure, sure, I believe you.
2. This book did not age well. At all.
When it was first published, this sort of 'toughen up, people have it worse than you' talk probably would've been more than acceptable to say to people struggling with anxiety. Nowadays, it just highlights how little the author and the society at the time understood mental health.
A bit shocking, considering that Carnegie spends an entire chapter in the beginning talking about the importance of taking care of your psychological well-being.
3. It contradicts itself. I've already mentioned that Carnegie simultaneously recommends 'taking care of your mental health' and 'to stop being selfish and gain some perspective'. In addition to that he also heavily promotes christianity, and even flat-out says that without religion it's impossible to truly enjoy life/be a good person. Hell, for a whole chapter he would not shut up about religion. That is, after saying 'it's fine to be atheist, and I'll use an example of an atheist writer here just for you'. What?
4. Another quote that pissed me off essentially said: 'be nice and friendly. It's impossible to be sad and depressed when you're being friendly and smiling at strangers.' What kind of logic is that? I spend a day saying hello, how are you? to people on the street and my sadness and worries magically go away? There are so many accounts of the most gregarious personalities secretly being depressed and anxious. Take for instance the numerous comedians and actors who have struggled with depression.
These are the main criticisms I have, but there are many more. Carnegie should've stuck to the 'become a better businessman' type of writing/lecturing. He does NOT understand psychology. This book is literally his retelling of random stories he heard and read, coupled with old aphorisms.. It's essentially: "Mrs. A got better through the power of Jesus, Mr. B stopped being anxious because he remembered about the starving children in Africa and got ashamed" x100. There are a few good bits, don't get me wrong, but the majority of the book is just garbage.
1. Carnegie relies very heavily on anecdotal evidence. I usually like that in self-improvement books, provided that the author also includes scientific evidence to back it all up. Carnegie does not. Furthermore, a number of the examples he uses are unconvincing at best. I mean, being diagnosed with incurable illness/paralysis but being instantaneously healed through the power of Jesus and some cheerfulness? Sure, sure, I believe you.
2. This book did not age well. At all.
When it was first published, this sort of 'toughen up, people have it worse than you' talk probably would've been more than acceptable to say to people struggling with anxiety. Nowadays, it just highlights how little the author and the society at the time understood mental health.
A bit shocking, considering that Carnegie spends an entire chapter in the beginning talking about the importance of taking care of your psychological well-being.
3. It contradicts itself. I've already mentioned that Carnegie simultaneously recommends 'taking care of your mental health' and 'to stop being selfish and gain some perspective'. In addition to that he also heavily promotes christianity, and even flat-out says that without religion it's impossible to truly enjoy life/be a good person. Hell, for a whole chapter he would not shut up about religion. That is, after saying 'it's fine to be atheist, and I'll use an example of an atheist writer here just for you'. What?
4. Another quote that pissed me off essentially said: 'be nice and friendly. It's impossible to be sad and depressed when you're being friendly and smiling at strangers.' What kind of logic is that? I spend a day saying hello, how are you? to people on the street and my sadness and worries magically go away? There are so many accounts of the most gregarious personalities secretly being depressed and anxious. Take for instance the numerous comedians and actors who have struggled with depression.
These are the main criticisms I have, but there are many more. Carnegie should've stuck to the 'become a better businessman' type of writing/lecturing. He does NOT understand psychology. This book is literally his retelling of random stories he heard and read, coupled with old aphorisms.. It's essentially: "Mrs. A got better through the power of Jesus, Mr. B stopped being anxious because he remembered about the starving children in Africa and got ashamed" x100. There are a few good bits, don't get me wrong, but the majority of the book is just garbage.
January 26, 2015
در زندگي چگونه ديدن و شنيدن ، خیلی مهم است. گاهي مورد تعریف و گاه تمسخر و انتقادهاي شديد قرار مي گيریم اما اينكه چه برداشتي از آنها بكنيم و اينكه چقدر واقعي و يا از روي حسادت و كينه و یا حیله مي باشند،مهارت خاصي مي خواهد که به قول پزرگان،پیراهن پاره کردن میخواهد.اما بجای پاره کردن لباس می شود کتابی بدست گرفت و در خیال پیراهن پاره این بزرگان رو پوشید و زندگی های متفاوتی رو تجربه کرد
چند قسمت کتاب رو خیلی دوس داشتم
یکیش ((كسي به سگ مرده لگد نمي زند)) كه يك ضرب المثل آمريكايي است و به گونه اي مترادف اين سخن مشهور (( باد با فانوس هاي خاموش كاري ندارد))هستش
وقتی بزرگ باشی مورد حملات منتقدان قرار میگیری تا تورا بشکنند و خود دیده شوند
یکیش هم ماجرای واقعی مردی بود که از زندگی مدرن و وحشیت جنگ جهانی خسته شده بود و به صحرایی در آفریقا میره و گوسفند میخره و خلاصه دامپروری پیشه میکنه
و ....
چند قسمت کتاب رو خیلی دوس داشتم
یکیش ((كسي به سگ مرده لگد نمي زند)) كه يك ضرب المثل آمريكايي است و به گونه اي مترادف اين سخن مشهور (( باد با فانوس هاي خاموش كاري ندارد))هستش
وقتی بزرگ باشی مورد حملات منتقدان قرار میگیری تا تورا بشکنند و خود دیده شوند
یکیش هم ماجرای واقعی مردی بود که از زندگی مدرن و وحشیت جنگ جهانی خسته شده بود و به صحرایی در آفریقا میره و گوسفند میخره و خلاصه دامپروری پیشه میکنه
و ....
August 24, 2014
أعتبر هذا الكتاب من أروع الكتب العملية التي تجعلك تترك عادة "القلق" الكريهة بخطوات عملية وواقعية
هذا الكتاب لا غبار عليه ويستحق شهرته ولكني في الاونة الأخيرة بدأت أؤمن أن ما أقرؤه في الكتب التي إن صح تسميتها دينية أو التي تتكلم عن تطوير الذات وعلم النفس بشكل عام ولكن عن طريق الكتاب والسنة أجدها أكمل وأشمل من الكتب الأجنبية المترجمة وصدقا في جميع مجالات الحياة ومجال الذات وعلم الاجتماع بالذات أجد أن كتب علماؤنا الذين شربوا من وعائي الكتاب والسنة أكثر اقناعا وأشد تأثيرا وأصح قولا
من غيرهم
بل أجد أن حديثا واحدا من أحاديث الرسول عليه الصلاة والسلام يختصر كتاب كامل ويصلح لأن يكون قاعدة يرجع إليها .
هذا الكتاب لا غبار عليه ويستحق شهرته ولكني في الاونة الأخيرة بدأت أؤمن أن ما أقرؤه في الكتب التي إن صح تسميتها دينية أو التي تتكلم عن تطوير الذات وعلم النفس بشكل عام ولكن عن طريق الكتاب والسنة أجدها أكمل وأشمل من الكتب الأجنبية المترجمة وصدقا في جميع مجالات الحياة ومجال الذات وعلم الاجتماع بالذات أجد أن كتب علماؤنا الذين شربوا من وعائي الكتاب والسنة أكثر اقناعا وأشد تأثيرا وأصح قولا
من غيرهم
بل أجد أن حديثا واحدا من أحاديث الرسول عليه الصلاة والسلام يختصر كتاب كامل ويصلح لأن يكون قاعدة يرجع إليها .
March 12, 2020
The book provides one with practical solutions to overcome one's worries, yet I found it quite long! I mean 300 pages of numerous examples of worrywarts in hope of the readers' identification with one of them are not necessary since their approach to prevail their fears and worries were almost the same in many cases. Carnegie's strive for assuring the reader that these examples are real by mentioning their full name and addresses was really on my nerves. The way he tried to tell the reader that just because s/he was not born so-and-so, s/he has to stop complaining about their worries was quite a self-esteem ruiner. And his strive to come up with religious names even made it worse.
کتاب نکته های کاربردی خوبی داره ولی واقعا 300 صفحه زیادیه و آوردن این همه مثال به امید اینکه بالاخره خواننده بتونه با یکیشون همذات پنداری کنه و به اضطرابش غلبه کنه ضرورتی نداره به خصوص که رویکرد افراد در غلبه به اضطرابشون تو خیلی از موارد از یک جنس هست ولی فقط ظاهر مشکلاتشون باهم فرق می کنه. تلاش نویسنده برای اینکه آدرس و اسم کامل افراد رو بیاره برخلاف تصور مرحوم که فکر می کرد اینطور بهتر میتونه اطمینان خواننده رو جلب کنه هم بیشتر رو اعصاب بود.
چیزی که واقعا غیرقابل تحمل بود این بود که چندجا سعی داشت بگه چون واسه فلانی و فلانی چنین اتفاقی افتاده اگر برای من و تو اتفاق بیافته که مشکلی نداره ما در برابر فلانی کی هستیم که شاکی بشیم یعنی رسما عزت نفس آدمی رو به فاک میده که حالا چون من فلانی نیستم آدم نیستم و در انتخاب فلانی هم دقت به خرج داده که مثلا اگر خواننده آدم مذهبی ای باشه لاقل از این منظر تحت تاثیر قرار بگیره .
نکته ی قابل توجه برای مخاطب های ایرانی اینه که اگر از دکتر هلاکویی خوشتون میاد با خوندن کتاب میفهمید دکتر این کتاب رو چندبار خونده و حتی تکیه کلام هاش رو هم اینجا پیدا می کنید مثلا "در تحلیل نهایی" یا "کوتاه سخن" که برای من جالب بود
May 2, 2011
ديل كارنيجي هو كاتبي المفضل في هذا المجال _ أي النتمية البشرية وتطوير الذات_،إنني لا أستطيع أن أنسى الكم الهائل من الفائدة التي حصلت عليها من كتابه " كيف تكسب الأصدقاء وتؤثر في الناس" ، قرأته في مرحلة مبكرة من العمر لم أكن حينها أعي شيئاً من التعامل مع الناس واكتساب ودهم، وقد فادني كتابه وقدم لي الكثير مما أذكره حتى هذه اللحظة.
إنني أعلم أن الكثير منا لايحب هذا النوع من الكتب باعتقاده أنها لاتقدم فائدة محسوسة وإنما هي مجرد عبارات وطرق نعيها جيداً ولسنا بحاجه إلى من يعيد علينا نفس المعلومات التي نحفظها عن ظهر غيب!. في اعتقادي إن هذه الكتب مصدر محفز للأغلبيه منا ويمكننا أن نقرأ منها في أوقات الفراغ أو كـ كتب فرعية تزيد من حماسنا وتقدمنا. في هذا الكتاب يعلم "ديل" بهذا التوجه للناس وإعراضهم عنها فكان منه أن استفتح كتابه بهذا المقطع الذي زاد من إصراري على قراءة كتابه وإنهائه :
"يحسن أن أخبرك أنك لن تجد في هذا الكتاب شيئاً جديداً ولكنك ستجد الشيء الكثير ممايتجاهله الناس، وهذا هو المهم .. فلا أنت، ولا أنا نحتاج إلى شيء جديد يقال .. فإننا نعلم مايكفي لأن يجعل حياتنا كاملة من جميع نواحيها. فعلتنا ليست الجهل، وإنما هي التجاهل. ومهمة الكتاب عي تكرار حقائق قديمة معروفة مع تجسميها وإبرازها، لتحفز على تطبيقها."
صحيح أنني أعلم مسبقاً بكل ماجاء في كتابه، وقد قمت بتطبيق بعض قواعده دونما شعور مني . لكنني دهشت حين وجدتني غفلت عن الكثير، بعض فصول هذا الكتاب جاءت وكأنها لي، وكأنها تعلم جيداً ما أمر به ومالذي احتاجه، كيف غاب عني أن أفعل ذات الشي الذي أحفظه، حينها شعرت بالفائدة التي قدمها لي هذا الكتاب الرائع، فائدة ماكنت لأتنبأ بها.
كاتب كـ" ديل كارنيجي" يعجبني فيه تسلسل أفكاره وترتيبها، وكأنه لايريد منك أن تنهي كتابه بلا فائدة، إنه يصر أن يجعلها أمامك مدة أطول بكثير من تلك التي تقضيها في قراءة كتابه، يتبع كل فصل من الكتاب إيجاز للقاعدة التي يحسن أن تعمل بها ، ثم يتبع نهاية كل جزء مختصر لايزيد عن صفحة واحدة، يخبرك بالفائدة التي من المفترض أن تكون حصلت عليها وستظل تذكرها وتحفظها في دفترك. ومع كل القواعد يأتي بقصص واقعيه توضحها وتعملك كيف أنه من السهل تطبيقها والعمل بها.
ثم يختم كتابه بالكلمات التالية :" اعلم أخيراً أن هذا ليس كتاباً للتسلية وقتل الوقت وإنما هو مرشد عمل مهمته تسديد خطاك في طريق الصحة والسعادة والنجاح"
وكأنه يخبرنا عن الفاصل بين استفادتنا من الكتب أو عدمه، إنه توجهك وانطباعك التي تبني عليه أحكامك حتى قبل قراءة الكتاب، بعضهم مقتنع تماماً أن مثل هذه الكتب لا يمكن أن تعود علينا بأي فائدة تذكر، وهؤلاء هم من أنصحهم بعدم تضيع وقتهم مع كتاب لايريدون فائدته! .. إننا نحتاج أن نريد الفائدة حتى نحصل عليها وبفاعلية أكبر
إنني أعلم أن الكثير منا لايحب هذا النوع من الكتب باعتقاده أنها لاتقدم فائدة محسوسة وإنما هي مجرد عبارات وطرق نعيها جيداً ولسنا بحاجه إلى من يعيد علينا نفس المعلومات التي نحفظها عن ظهر غيب!. في اعتقادي إن هذه الكتب مصدر محفز للأغلبيه منا ويمكننا أن نقرأ منها في أوقات الفراغ أو كـ كتب فرعية تزيد من حماسنا وتقدمنا. في هذا الكتاب يعلم "ديل" بهذا التوجه للناس وإعراضهم عنها فكان منه أن استفتح كتابه بهذا المقطع الذي زاد من إصراري على قراءة كتابه وإنهائه :
"يحسن أن أخبرك أنك لن تجد في هذا الكتاب شيئاً جديداً ولكنك ستجد الشيء الكثير ممايتجاهله الناس، وهذا هو المهم .. فلا أنت، ولا أنا نحتاج إلى شيء جديد يقال .. فإننا نعلم مايكفي لأن يجعل حياتنا كاملة من جميع نواحيها. فعلتنا ليست الجهل، وإنما هي التجاهل. ومهمة الكتاب عي تكرار حقائق قديمة معروفة مع تجسميها وإبرازها، لتحفز على تطبيقها."
صحيح أنني أعلم مسبقاً بكل ماجاء في كتابه، وقد قمت بتطبيق بعض قواعده دونما شعور مني . لكنني دهشت حين وجدتني غفلت عن الكثير، بعض فصول هذا الكتاب جاءت وكأنها لي، وكأنها تعلم جيداً ما أمر به ومالذي احتاجه، كيف غاب عني أن أفعل ذات الشي الذي أحفظه، حينها شعرت بالفائدة التي قدمها لي هذا الكتاب الرائع، فائدة ماكنت لأتنبأ بها.
كاتب كـ" ديل كارنيجي" يعجبني فيه تسلسل أفكاره وترتيبها، وكأنه لايريد منك أن تنهي كتابه بلا فائدة، إنه يصر أن يجعلها أمامك مدة أطول بكثير من تلك التي تقضيها في قراءة كتابه، يتبع كل فصل من الكتاب إيجاز للقاعدة التي يحسن أن تعمل بها ، ثم يتبع نهاية كل جزء مختصر لايزيد عن صفحة واحدة، يخبرك بالفائدة التي من المفترض أن تكون حصلت عليها وستظل تذكرها وتحفظها في دفترك. ومع كل القواعد يأتي بقصص واقعيه توضحها وتعملك كيف أنه من السهل تطبيقها والعمل بها.
ثم يختم كتابه بالكلمات التالية :" اعلم أخيراً أن هذا ليس كتاباً للتسلية وقتل الوقت وإنما هو مرشد عمل مهمته تسديد خطاك في طريق الصحة والسعادة والنجاح"
وكأنه يخبرنا عن الفاصل بين استفادتنا من الكتب أو عدمه، إنه توجهك وانطباعك التي تبني عليه أحكامك حتى قبل قراءة الكتاب، بعضهم مقتنع تماماً أن مثل هذه الكتب لا يمكن أن تعود علينا بأي فائدة تذكر، وهؤلاء هم من أنصحهم بعدم تضيع وقتهم مع كتاب لايريدون فائدته! .. إننا نحتاج أن نريد الفائدة حتى نحصل عليها وبفاعلية أكبر
November 5, 2023
If you’ve ever worried more than you'd like to, read this book.
“No one living has enough emotion and vigor to fight the inevitable and, at the same time, enough left over to create a new life. Choose one or the other. You can either bend with the inevitable sleetstorms of life—or you can resist them and break!”
~ Dale Carnegie from How to Stop Worrying and Start Living
Dale Carnegie rocks.
If you’ve read How to Win Friends and Influence People, you’ve been exposed to his laid back, tell-it-like-it-is style.
If you’ve got a little more worry in your life than you’d like (who doesn’t, eh?!) then I think you’ll love this book.
Some of my favorite big ideas from this book include:
1. What Worry Does - It’s not good.
2. Live In: - Day-tight compartments.
3. Be Willing to Have It So - Don’t argue with reality.
4. Decide - And rock it!
5. Don’t Cry - Over spilt milk.
6. Rest - *BEFORE* you get tired.
7. The Answer to Fatigue? - 4 of ‘em.
8. Other People - (Aren’t) thinking about you.
9. Get Busy!!! - No leisure to be miserable.
I’ve summarized those Big Ideas in a video review that you can watch here: https://youtu.be/sY7FZ4loE0o?feature=...
I’ve also added How to Stop Worrying and Start Living by Dale Carnegie to my collection of Philosopher’s Notes--distilling the Big Ideas into 6-page PDF and 20-minute MP3s on 600+ of the BEST self-development books ever. You can get access to all of those plus a TON more over at https://heroic.us.
“No one living has enough emotion and vigor to fight the inevitable and, at the same time, enough left over to create a new life. Choose one or the other. You can either bend with the inevitable sleetstorms of life—or you can resist them and break!”
~ Dale Carnegie from How to Stop Worrying and Start Living
Dale Carnegie rocks.
If you’ve read How to Win Friends and Influence People, you’ve been exposed to his laid back, tell-it-like-it-is style.
If you’ve got a little more worry in your life than you’d like (who doesn’t, eh?!) then I think you’ll love this book.
Some of my favorite big ideas from this book include:
1. What Worry Does - It’s not good.
2. Live In: - Day-tight compartments.
3. Be Willing to Have It So - Don’t argue with reality.
4. Decide - And rock it!
5. Don’t Cry - Over spilt milk.
6. Rest - *BEFORE* you get tired.
7. The Answer to Fatigue? - 4 of ‘em.
8. Other People - (Aren’t) thinking about you.
9. Get Busy!!! - No leisure to be miserable.
I’ve summarized those Big Ideas in a video review that you can watch here: https://youtu.be/sY7FZ4loE0o?feature=...
I’ve also added How to Stop Worrying and Start Living by Dale Carnegie to my collection of Philosopher’s Notes--distilling the Big Ideas into 6-page PDF and 20-minute MP3s on 600+ of the BEST self-development books ever. You can get access to all of those plus a TON more over at https://heroic.us.
February 15, 2009
FINALLY. I have finished this book. WHEW.
The version I read of this book was published in 1944. I don't know if newer versions have been modified at all, or not.
I would've given the book a five star rating if it hadn't been so completely TORTUROUS to get through the chauvinistic view points. Granted, most all of Carnegie's strategies for overcoming stress and worry were excellent and I plan to put many ideas to use, HOWEVER, the ideas presented in chapters like #25 titled: "How the Housewife Can Avoid Fatigue and Keep Looking Young!" are ridiculous. This chapter took me days to get through - and it was only five pages long!
For example, to quote from this, my least favorite part of the book, "Yes, you, as a housewife, have got to relax! You have one great advantage - you can lie down whenever you want to, and you can lie on the floor!...Lie flat on the floor whenever you feel tired. Stretch as tall as you can. Roll around if you want to. Do it twice a day."
HAH. If I had read this exerpt first, I would have thrown the book in the trash.
However, I was determined to acknowledge that this book was written in 1944 and attitudes towards women were much different then. So, I tried to ignore the comments about females and instead focused on the valid strategies to overcome worry.
The worthwhile strategies presented outweigh the chauvinistic attitudes.
I do recommend this book - but only if you are open-minded.
The version I read of this book was published in 1944. I don't know if newer versions have been modified at all, or not.
I would've given the book a five star rating if it hadn't been so completely TORTUROUS to get through the chauvinistic view points. Granted, most all of Carnegie's strategies for overcoming stress and worry were excellent and I plan to put many ideas to use, HOWEVER, the ideas presented in chapters like #25 titled: "How the Housewife Can Avoid Fatigue and Keep Looking Young!" are ridiculous. This chapter took me days to get through - and it was only five pages long!
For example, to quote from this, my least favorite part of the book, "Yes, you, as a housewife, have got to relax! You have one great advantage - you can lie down whenever you want to, and you can lie on the floor!...Lie flat on the floor whenever you feel tired. Stretch as tall as you can. Roll around if you want to. Do it twice a day."
HAH. If I had read this exerpt first, I would have thrown the book in the trash.
However, I was determined to acknowledge that this book was written in 1944 and attitudes towards women were much different then. So, I tried to ignore the comments about females and instead focused on the valid strategies to overcome worry.
The worthwhile strategies presented outweigh the chauvinistic attitudes.
I do recommend this book - but only if you are open-minded.
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