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Are My Kids on Track?: The 12 Emotional, Social, and Spiritual Milestones Your Child Needs to Reach
Tools for Identifying and Developing Spiritual, Social, and Emotional Growth
From birth to adulthood, our children's physical and intellectual development is carefully tracked and charted. But what about their hearts? After all, how our children develop emotionally, socially, and spiritually will determine who they become as husbands and wives, fathers and mothers, friends and co-workers.
Are My Kids on Track? helps you identify and measure 12 key emotional, social, and spiritual milestones in your children's lives. Moreover, you will discover practical ways to guide your kids through any stumbling blocks they might encounter and help them reach the appropriate landmarks. Along the way the authors pinpoint the different ways boys and girls develop, so you can help your child flourish in his or her own way.
Filled with decades of experience from three practicing counselors, speakers, and writers, this book provides you with valuable, current research and user-friendly, hands-on practices to make supporting your kids' soul
development a seamless part of family life. Don't just raise smart kids--raise courageous, compassionate, resilient, empathetic, and smart kids.
From birth to adulthood, our children's physical and intellectual development is carefully tracked and charted. But what about their hearts? After all, how our children develop emotionally, socially, and spiritually will determine who they become as husbands and wives, fathers and mothers, friends and co-workers.
Are My Kids on Track? helps you identify and measure 12 key emotional, social, and spiritual milestones in your children's lives. Moreover, you will discover practical ways to guide your kids through any stumbling blocks they might encounter and help them reach the appropriate landmarks. Along the way the authors pinpoint the different ways boys and girls develop, so you can help your child flourish in his or her own way.
Filled with decades of experience from three practicing counselors, speakers, and writers, this book provides you with valuable, current research and user-friendly, hands-on practices to make supporting your kids' soul
development a seamless part of family life. Don't just raise smart kids--raise courageous, compassionate, resilient, empathetic, and smart kids.
304 pages, Kindle Edition
First published February 1, 2017
630 people are currently reading
3484 people want to read
About the author
Sissy Goff
23 books212 followersSISSY GOFF, M.Ed., LPC-MHSP spends most of her days talking with girls and their families, with the help of her counseling assistant/pet therapist, Lucy the Havanese. She has worked as the Director of Child and Adolescent Counseling at Daystar Counseling Ministries in Nashville, Tennessee since 1993, with a Master’s degree from Vanderbilt University. Sissy speaks to parents across the country and is the author of eleven books including Raising Girls. and her newest books, Raising Worry-Free Girls and Braver, Stronger Smarter (for elementary school girls) which will be released in September of 2019.
Sissy is a regular contributor to various podcasts and publications, including their own soon-to-be released podcast called Raising Boys and Girls. You can find more information and resources at www.raisingboysandgirls.com.
Sissy is a regular contributor to various podcasts and publications, including their own soon-to-be released podcast called Raising Boys and Girls. You can find more information and resources at www.raisingboysandgirls.com.
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 157 reviews
January 18, 2023
3.5. I loved the beginning sections on emotional maturity for my kids, but also myself. Their methods fit really well with the philosophy of Love and Logic and it gives practical tips I plan to implement. The authors are extremely knowledgeable on the psychology of children, but I felt they had poor attempts at weaving spirituality throughout. The chapters on spiritual milestones (especially Meaning , Foundation and Mercy) were not good representations of the gospel and filled with christianese . They watered down the explanation of salvation and what it means to live as a Christian. Lots of focus on self and how “you are enough” because God made you special… not exactly the full picture. Very little mention of Christ and it sounded as though they assume your child will be a believer. There were quotes from questionable sources and almost all scripture references were from The Message. I am still willing to read the books on my list by Goff and Thomas, but with more discernment of their spiritual advice as I’m not fully sure where they stand theologically.
February 28, 2021
The title of this book is a little misleading, and I almost didn’t pick it up because of it. But it was recommended and I’m glad I read it. The author even points out that all kids are on track and all kids aren’t in one way or another. Part of parenting is to pay attention, cheer them and help them along, to teach and ask good questions, and provide support with grace. This book is filled with many practical ideas to help build up the next generation in developing empathy, courage, perspective, boundaries, ownership, mercy, etc.
March 12, 2019
Excellent parenting book and good strategies. It’s one that I’ll pick up over and over through the years. Great podcast too with Sarah Bragg....very helpful for parents in all stages.
September 12, 2023
Overall, this was a very helpful and practical book, especially the emotional milestone section, which is the age range we’re at. I really appreciate David and Sissy’s insight, and there are several things in here I want to immediately implement. I’ll likely come back to this book as my girls grow. I’ll be reading more books by Sissy especially-but would definitely recommend David’s stuff to moms of boys! Their writing and tone are very engaging and genuine, and they truly know kids!
I wish there had been time in each chapter really defining the terms. Some of the milestones overlap and I found myself sometimes confused about what exactly they were talking about.
This certainly isn’t a theological book, but the authors use scripture throughout. At times I totally agreed with their points, but other times I felt their connections were pretty weak-they’d make a point then reference a verse in the Message that was taken out of context to include a scriptural tie in. Their content was still really good, I just wish their use of Scripture had been more carefully included to be true to the meaning of the text.
I wish there had been time in each chapter really defining the terms. Some of the milestones overlap and I found myself sometimes confused about what exactly they were talking about.
This certainly isn’t a theological book, but the authors use scripture throughout. At times I totally agreed with their points, but other times I felt their connections were pretty weak-they’d make a point then reference a verse in the Message that was taken out of context to include a scriptural tie in. Their content was still really good, I just wish their use of Scripture had been more carefully included to be true to the meaning of the text.
September 8, 2019
This book is freaking fantastic. I highlighted EVERY. Single. Page. I feel like I've seen where my own emotional, social, and spiritual milestones have lagged, and where I am succeeding, and then been given the tools to identify and meet those milestones for my kids. This will absolutely be a book I read again and again and give to the parents around me that are struggling with their kids (or not) in any number of ways. It's all in here, and it all feels doable with the steps at the end of each chapter. I really loved it.
March 5, 2024
I’m a big fan of Sissy Goff and David Thomas. The format of this book feels a little clunky but it’s still a great resource to see stumbling blocks in development or just encourage the kids you love.
January 31, 2023
Excellent and from a Christian perspective.
June 6, 2017
Rating 3.5 Stars
How then do we give hope to children? We give hope to children when we tell them what matters most. They don't need to be told to try harder, believe more, or do better. That just leaves them in despair. One word trust.
This subject matter is worthy to be purused. Our emotions can take us to both good and dark places. I appreciated this as a mother of two girls and now two grandchildren and with my own experience know the value of emotional maturity. Whether you deny your emotions or if you are consumed by your emotions, we as parents need to help our children with them. To strengthen their trust in us as parents so that our children can have the confidence to express themselves in healthy ways.
The books shares on how we as parents can give our children vocabulary, perspective, teaching empathy and finally resourcefulness. Having our children becoming aware, reciprocity and ownership leads to healthy relationships.
The book is done in 3 parts.
Emotional Milestones
-Emotional Vocabulary
-Perspective
-Empathy
-Resourcefulness
Social Milestones
-Awareness
-Reciprocity
-Ownership
-Boundaries
Spiritual Milestones
-Foundation
-Identity
-Mercy
-Meaning
My only concern was the recommended reading of Jesus Calling. I cannot endorse that as it does not give a solid foundation of faith but someone's own personal experience. Our children's emotional well being should be a concern and I think this book puts a parent in the direction of achieving that for their children. I would definitely look to others books that have more of a solid theology in the emotional well being of our children.
A Special Thank You to Bethany House Publishing and Netgalley for the ARC and the opportunity to post an honest review.
How then do we give hope to children? We give hope to children when we tell them what matters most. They don't need to be told to try harder, believe more, or do better. That just leaves them in despair. One word trust.
This subject matter is worthy to be purused. Our emotions can take us to both good and dark places. I appreciated this as a mother of two girls and now two grandchildren and with my own experience know the value of emotional maturity. Whether you deny your emotions or if you are consumed by your emotions, we as parents need to help our children with them. To strengthen their trust in us as parents so that our children can have the confidence to express themselves in healthy ways.
The books shares on how we as parents can give our children vocabulary, perspective, teaching empathy and finally resourcefulness. Having our children becoming aware, reciprocity and ownership leads to healthy relationships.
The book is done in 3 parts.
Emotional Milestones
-Emotional Vocabulary
-Perspective
-Empathy
-Resourcefulness
Social Milestones
-Awareness
-Reciprocity
-Ownership
-Boundaries
Spiritual Milestones
-Foundation
-Identity
-Mercy
-Meaning
My only concern was the recommended reading of Jesus Calling. I cannot endorse that as it does not give a solid foundation of faith but someone's own personal experience. Our children's emotional well being should be a concern and I think this book puts a parent in the direction of achieving that for their children. I would definitely look to others books that have more of a solid theology in the emotional well being of our children.
A Special Thank You to Bethany House Publishing and Netgalley for the ARC and the opportunity to post an honest review.
December 2, 2020
Some great common-grace reminders about brain development and what different stages will struggle with, some useful practical ideas to help kids grow in various emotional and social skills (like empathy), and some authors who have an obvious heart and love for children in all stages.
I did find the book to be lacking in the acknowledgement that Christianity is counter-cultural (some of the advice seems to assume the cultural current is what we're swimming with). It was also unclear, sometimes, exactly how they defined the quality they were describing in each chapter: they'd jump right to "Stumbling Blocks" and "Building Blocks" for each quality before I was fully on board with what our working idea of Awareness or Reciprocity was.
They quoted some authors whose orthodoxy I trust and some authors who are dangerously unorthodox. I also prefer for Bible quotations not to be almost solely from The Message--which is a useful paraphrase, but in my opinion a poor proof text.
I did find the book to be lacking in the acknowledgement that Christianity is counter-cultural (some of the advice seems to assume the cultural current is what we're swimming with). It was also unclear, sometimes, exactly how they defined the quality they were describing in each chapter: they'd jump right to "Stumbling Blocks" and "Building Blocks" for each quality before I was fully on board with what our working idea of Awareness or Reciprocity was.
They quoted some authors whose orthodoxy I trust and some authors who are dangerously unorthodox. I also prefer for Bible quotations not to be almost solely from The Message--which is a useful paraphrase, but in my opinion a poor proof text.
May 21, 2018
I think that this has been the best parenting book I have ever read. I appreciated the practical suggestions at the end of each chapter. They were actually useful! This book is biblically based and follows a format of information regarding boys and then follows with information for girls. My kiddos personalities don't always follow generalizations based on gender but I was able to apply the information to whichever child I thought it would fit best. I will be reading this book again and referring back to it often as we navigate these teen years.
April 24, 2022
I absolutely love and respect everything these three write, and this is no exception! Wonderful book and helpful tool.
January 20, 2023
More of a 4.5. Listened on audio. This book was crazy helpful and I will be buying a paper copy. The authors are Christian counselors and go through emotional, social, and spiritual milestones that kids of different age groups need to work on. There are building blocks and stumbling blocks that they address for each one. The info is also separated out by gender which helps as well. I can’t outline the book bc there were too many details. And that’s not my forte. I felt like I was already well acquainted with the emotional and spiritual skills for younger kids, especially boys. But social skills, older kids, and girl stuff are new to me!
There were a couple things that bugged me, some personal and some legit issues with the book. It was personally hard for me to learn about support I haven’t received and skills I don’t have. This isn’t the authors’ fault, of course, but it was a challenge for me. But it was also helpful because I was able to see and work through things in my own heart there.
The other issue is one I have with many books, including Christian nonfiction: the authors come from a specific mindset and act as though it’s normative, when really it’s just one way of living. Theirs is a white western upper middle class evangelical neurotypical perspective. They briefly touch on adhd and autism as potential roadblocks to learning these things, but dealing with other perspectives seemed out of the scope of this book.
I’d love an updated version with things like neurodiversity, racism, disability, poverty, and cultural differences addressed as potential roadblocks. People in different circumstances may value different spiritual, emotional, and social skills and may approach this book differently. Im not saying this because I’m trying to be an intersectional snowflake, but because I found their advice hard to follow in my very ADHD home, and extra tips would help me. Specifically in things relating to executive function like emotional control and social skills. I can also imagine someone with an eastern perspective thinking certain milestones are more or less important based on cultural values.
But I am an American, as are my kids, so it will help us trust God and worship him with all our heart, soul, mind, and strength and love our neighbor as ourselves in our current circumstances. I learned a lot and look forward to applying it!
There were a couple things that bugged me, some personal and some legit issues with the book. It was personally hard for me to learn about support I haven’t received and skills I don’t have. This isn’t the authors’ fault, of course, but it was a challenge for me. But it was also helpful because I was able to see and work through things in my own heart there.
The other issue is one I have with many books, including Christian nonfiction: the authors come from a specific mindset and act as though it’s normative, when really it’s just one way of living. Theirs is a white western upper middle class evangelical neurotypical perspective. They briefly touch on adhd and autism as potential roadblocks to learning these things, but dealing with other perspectives seemed out of the scope of this book.
I’d love an updated version with things like neurodiversity, racism, disability, poverty, and cultural differences addressed as potential roadblocks. People in different circumstances may value different spiritual, emotional, and social skills and may approach this book differently. Im not saying this because I’m trying to be an intersectional snowflake, but because I found their advice hard to follow in my very ADHD home, and extra tips would help me. Specifically in things relating to executive function like emotional control and social skills. I can also imagine someone with an eastern perspective thinking certain milestones are more or less important based on cultural values.
But I am an American, as are my kids, so it will help us trust God and worship him with all our heart, soul, mind, and strength and love our neighbor as ourselves in our current circumstances. I learned a lot and look forward to applying it!
June 10, 2024
I thought this was a really helpful book with a lot of great Bible-based resources to help keep your child and teen on track in development. There was a part where one of the counselors kept saying how important it is to tell your girl that "she is enough", which I would edit to add "IN CHRIST she is enough". Out of the whole book that's the one thing that stuck out to me that I would change. But overall, I thought this was great and helpful for me. This book would be one I would purchase and reference often.
January 27, 2023
I just love these authors and their hearts for helping children and parents navigate today’s childhood challenges. In response to the title question, “All kids are—and all kids aren’t in one way or another… Part of your job is to pay attention to the track. To cheer them and help them along.” Really enjoyed this practical book.
August 28, 2025
I love the Daystar squad. Podcasts, books, I want whatever they got. I love how they break each section down with practical ways to implement the principles. Sissy and David and Melissa always perfectly point to the way Jesus wants us to raise children in a way that doesn’t make me feel like I’ve already failed. Lots of parenting myself in learning to be the best parent I can be.
January 23, 2021
Practical counseling book for parents. Comprehensive and thorough, maybe even a bit overwhelming when taken all together. Really appreciate the differences laid out between raising boys and girls, as well as the typical stumbling blocks that impede development.
December 30, 2021
This book is excellent. I need to reread it because I wish I could have highlighted the majority of the book. "Prepping the child for the path rather than preparing the path for the child” is a great reminder for all of us parents.
December 27, 2022
Several good things in this book. Was a little hard to digest all of the information and I would think following this book up by going to one of their conferences would help make sense of all they spoke of. Good materials though. Definitely one to reference and reread and children get older.
March 25, 2021
This is a really great book with tons of insight into your child’s mind. I didn’t feel beat up or shamed, nor did I feel I was walking away overwhelmed or burdened. It was uplifting and encouraging.. There are lots of practical tips to help you as you navigate the tween and teen years. I recommend this as a parenting book!
January 3, 2022
As parenting books go, this is a really good one. Applicable for parents with littles as well as teenagers.
February 7, 2022
Amazing resource. Thoughtful and practical and relevant material. Written by experts who you can tell are quite good at what they do!
April 15, 2022
Excellent!! So good. So helpful. Ordered the physical copy. Can’t wait to implement these ideas.
December 3, 2023
Loved this book. So much guidance for parenting girls and boys.
March 31, 2025
I love anything by David Thomas and Sissy Goff! Another home run!
September 11, 2025
I think all parents should read this book. Excellent.
May 5, 2020
Wavering between a 3 and 4 on this one. I'm "rounding up" because I book-darted so many things to remember. This is a counseling book that covers emotional, social, and spiritual development of children. The authors suggest many of the standard counseling techniques, but from a Christian perspective. The recommendations are very much aligned with the "Love & Logic" way of thinking. Each chapter is broken down into "stumbling blocks" and "building blocks" by gender (boys/girls) for each competency.
* Too many mentions of DayStar (the authors' counseling center).
* Too many mentions of DayStar (the authors' counseling center).
July 10, 2023
Such a practical and helpful book for parents!! This will definitely be one I reread and reference year after year.
October 26, 2023
Highly, highly recommend to all parents (at all ages and stages). One of the most helpful, practical parenting books I’ve read. So much evidence-based research and actual real-life application.
January 9, 2024
I’m glad I kicked off the year with this book as it is one of the better parenting books I’ve read. I got about halfway through and decided to buy a paper copy for my spouse since there are so many good strategies and action items laid out. This was a 10/10 for me.
February 29, 2024
I loved this book written by the team of Christian therapists which hosts the “Raising Boys and Girls” podcast. There are a lot of books out there that are focused on helping parents with their kids/teens with their emotions. While this book did a great job with that, it also included so much more! Some of my favorite chapters included helping kids take ownership of their actions, developing resourcefulness, and reciprocity within relationships. Right now, the book is free on audible if you are a member.
Displaying 1 - 30 of 157 reviews