Coming Clean: Diary of a Painkiller Addict

by Cathryn Kemp

'A brave, heartfelt and extraordinary book' Corinne Sweet, author of Overcoming Addiction, psychologist and broadcaster What if the drugs that were meant to cure you slowly started to kill you?After falling dangerously ill with acute-on-chronic pancreatitis, Cathryn Kemp left hospital with a repeat prescription for fentanyl, a painkiller 100 times stronger than heroin.Within two years she was taking almost ten times the NHS maximum daily dose - all on prescription - and her life began to spiral out of control. Cathryn discovered she had just three months to live, unless she gave up the drug she clung to so desperately.After selling everything she owned and checking into rehab, Cathryn was told by the doctors that recovery was highly unlikely. Yet to everyone's amazement, she proved them wrong.Coming Clean is a poignant, vivid and honest memoir of a woman's struggle with, and subsequent victory over, her demons. It is a love story, a horror story, a survival story, and one that shows the very real dangers of the over-prescription of painkillers.

Genres: Nonfiction

322 pages, Kindle Edition

Published February 2, 2017

About the author

Cathryn is a Sunday Times bestselling ghostwriter and journalist, with a prolific career writing celebrity, inspirational, true crime, addiction and nostalgia titles.
A Poisoner's Tale, published by Transworld/Penguin Random House on July 11th, 2024, is her first foray into historical fiction.
When not writing, Cathryn can be found braving the waves off the south coast or restoring her glorious Victorian wreck with her son Leonardo and cat Gingey.

Reviews

[Wilde Sky · Rating 5 out of 5]

A woman recounts, in graphic detail, her descent into a hellish world of prescription painkiller addition and subsequent recovery.

I found this book incredibly moving and brutally honest – some of the descriptions of her hospital treatment (lack of care) were heart breaking. The writing and pace were good and the unshrinking way that she described her decline (and her honesty that her parent’s money helped to save her) was refreshing.

Anyone who looks down on those less fortunate (than themselves) should read this book as it shows how a few bad decisions / luck / health / financial issues can lead virtually anyone into serious trouble (for example addiction).

[Louisa]

as with born round, second half fell flat.

[Elisabeth Brookshire · Rating 5 out of 5]

Eye opening

I live in the US and have private insurance so the experiences the author recounts here with the NHS are pretty startling. The hospitals sound dystopian and horrifying. I do not blame the author whatsoever for her opioid addiction. I blame her GP mostly and his willful ignorance at her condition and what was really going on. He's the one who kept upping her dose to insane levels and then just abruptly cut her off? He very well could have killed her or at the least driven her to the streets and needles. I am very glad for the author recounting this experience and amazed at her resiliency. This is a must read for those interested in pain management, prescription drug misuse, and rehabilitation centers although the one she was at is nothing like those here. You definitely wouldn't be able to have a candle, lighter, locking bathroom doors, unlimited smoking, amongst other perks that her private rehab allowed!

[Milly · Rating 5 out of 5]

“It is a mystery how the human spirit is spun of such fragile material and yet can withstand such enormous destructive forces. It's like that saying that a room in darkness only needs one small candle flame to have light. In my own small way, I feel I am becoming that flame. Bobbing and weaving into life, laughing with the joy of existing.”

Wonderful book that deconstructs notions surrounding addicts as living on the outskirts of society hooked on ‘street drugs’. We all have our vices. Cathryn is an extremely brave woman and her experiences are truly horrific but she writes with such conviction and charisma. I am so glad there was a happy ending to this story.

This book taught me that a core part of addiction is not being able to bear being present in your life.

[Nadirah · Rating 3 out of 5]

This was a raw and honest look into how the author suffered from debilitating pain for seemingly no reason one day, only to end up at the mercy of the NHS system and become addicted to the painkillers that kept her barely alive. It was a harrowing but ultimately uplifting true story of how Kemp overcame her addiction.

[Charlene Brewer · Rating 5 out of 5]

A true and honest look at addiction. So well written with pure raw emotion

A true and honest look at addiction. So well written with pure raw emotion . People like the author make the world a better place.

[Mohamed Junkeer · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is a very sad story and an eye opener to look at the other side of the drug addicts. Very depressing story from the beginning. However, it's a fairytale ending.

[Filzah Aliah · Rating 4 out of 5]

At first I didn't have any expectation on this memoir, but along the way I begin to understand her struggles and related to when I faced patients with the same condition as her in my daily practice. There is always two sides of coins and I'm glad to be able to understand her life POV, and helped me develop more empathy towards my patients and their daily struggles.