F*cked: Being Sexually Explorative and Self-Confident in a World That's Screwed

by Corinne Fisher, Krystyna Hutchinson

Comedians Corinne Fisher and Krystyna Hutchinson started Guys We F*cked: The Anti Slut-Shaming Podcast in 2013, intending to interview guys they'd slept with to learn more about themselves and squash the stigma so often associated with sexual women. As the podcast grew, and Corinne and Krystyna got to know their fans, stories of sexual assault, verbal and emotional abuse, and crippling shame became common topics of discussion along with those humorous conversations highlighting overall sexual confusion among many adults. The podcast is now an community of over a million listeners worldwide, and a place where any and all taboo sex topics are discussed freely, both with celebrity guests and the real people in their lives.

Their new book, F*cked, follows that model, as Corinne and Krystyna bring a mix of raw, ridiculous, and serious sexual conversation to the page that will include topics like:


Why shame is completely made up and how we can stop giving into it
Sexual exploration and how it sometimes ends in a trip to the ER
Stuff we should stop doing: Snooping, nitpicking our bodies, and faking orgasms
Asking your sexual partner uncomfortable questions
How to get yourself out of an unsafe situation
Masturbation, threesomes, porn, sex toys, butt stuff
And much, much more
Corinne and Krystyna are tired of books that pander to women like they’re hot messes, unable to handle their emotions without the assistance of a man, a glass of rosé, and a Xanax. This book will teach the reader, be they male, female, transgender or undecided, that you deal with sh*t, you brush your shoulder off, and you move the f*ck on. In a society where it has, for some reason, become chic to be the victim, they say this pity party ends now.

This is a guide to love and sex for women who drink whiskey because they like it, not because it’s a cute thing to say on your Tinder profile. It has no trigger warnings because life doesn’t come with those. It won’t talk down to you or coddle you because you’re better than that. Corinne and Krystyna aren’t going to explain why he’s just not that into you, because it doesn’t f*cking matter. Despite what television, Rom-Coms, and glossy magazines tell you, you’re fine all by yourself. This is the book Bridget Jones should’ve read instead of writing that sh*tty diary in the first place.

 

Genres: Nonfiction, Feminism, Sexuality, Audiobook, Memoir, Relationships, Self Help

248 pages, Hardcover

First published October 24, 2017

About the author

CORINNE FISHER is a stand-up comedian, writer & actor originally from Union, NJ. She first made a splash with her debut one-woman show Corinne Fisher: I STALK YOU (Dir. David Crabb) which had a run at The Peoples Improv Theater (The PIT) in the Summer of 2010 and was featured in Time Out New York. Since then, she has been a regular on the stand-up scene playing anything from dive bars to world-famous comedy clubs like New York Comedy Club, The Stand, The Standing Room, Caroline’s, Upright Citizens Brigade Theatre, Broadway Comedy Club, Comix, Laugh Boston, The Stress Factory & Gotham. Her second stage show, Almost Former Reality TV Stars, had a run at The PIT in June 2011 and told the true (albeit slightly exaggerated) story of how CORINNE and her real-life best friend, actor/model THOMAS WHITFIELD, were hired, then fired from their very own reality TV show.

Perhaps most notably, however, CORINNE is 1/2 of SORRY ABOUT LAST NIGHT…, her comedy writing and performance duo with KRYSTYNA HUTCHINSON. In December 2013, the duo launched Guys We F*cked: The Anti Slut-Shaming Podcast that now boasts a million+ listeners worldwide. Having featured celebs such as AMBER ROSE, STOYA, DAN SAVAGE, JIM NORTON, ARTIE LANGE, HORATIO SANZ, ANDY DICK, LIZZ WINSTEAD (Co-Creator of “The Daily Show”) and JENNI ‘JWOWW’ FARLEY (“Jersey Shore”) in addition to real gents they’ve had their way with, the podcast is consistently ranked among the Top 10 comedy podcasts on iTunes (but has reached as high as #1) and has been featured on The Huffington Post, The Daily Beast, Splitsider, Mother Jones, Perez Hilton, Elle, A.V. Club, E! Online, People, US Magazine, and Bust as well as OPIE & JIM on Sirius Radio and NBC’s LAST CALL WITH CARSON DALY.

Reviews

[Heather · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book was informative and entertaining to read. If you're not a fan of frank sexual talk, or profanity (I dig both of those things), this is not the book for you. It made me want to find their podcast. :)

[Alexis U · Rating 1 out of 5]

DNF @ 40% (may be more but I don't have my copy in front of me.)

My gift to myself for Christmas is relinquishing the expectation that I will finish or enjoy this book. I don't see the issues I have with this book being resolved by finishing it so I'm just not going to put myself through that. I love myself.

In short: just listen to the podcast. They cover everything from the book in way more depth, and I feel the conversations that evolve over the course of each episode are far more valuable and nuanced discussions of the topics at hand. The podcast will challenge you at times (I've literally had to put down certain episodes because I was so angry at the things being said) but I have gotten a lot out of it, even when I disagree with the hosts or guests.

All that said, here are some thoughts I jotted down while reading:

I disagree regarding the approach to Trigger Warnings, especially because it seems like an “edgy” but not well thought-out opinion in context. You can’t just pretend you don’t endorse trigger warnings when you’ve written a whole paragraph about how you’re going to be talking about sex, relationships, abortion, sexual assault, etc… which effectively serve as trigger warnings. I think raging against trigger warnings because “real life doesn’t have trigger warnings” while effectively ignoring the instances in which real life does actually have trigger warnings is just silly for the sake of being contradictory.

The three page chapter on how men repressing emotion is natural and good for society was, in my opinion, woefully ineffective at presenting a well-rounded argument. Its citations included Corrinne’s conservative boyfriend, and one scientific study which agreed with him. But in a cursory google search I can find umpteen articles and scientific studies to the contrary. I understand that Corrinne and Krystyna are comedians, not scientists/researchers/mental health professionals, but for months leading up to the book’s release they stressed how much research they poured into this book. Maybe I’m nitpicking because I’m an English major, but solely citing the one source that backs up your opinion without reference to the myriad of others that directly contradict it is, at best, poor writing. The lack of sources and surface-level research was a theme throughout each chapter, but this instance was the worst offender.

This book is very centered on cisgender, heterosexual relationships, with references to LGBTQ+ individuals inserted as afterthoughts (literally, up to the 40% mark they’re usually only referenced in parenthetical statements.) There isn’t any nuance to the inclusion, or discussion of how relationship dynamics between those in the LGBTQ+ community might differ from cis/het relationships. This may seem like a LOT of work, and it certainly is! But it’s necessary if you want to call your work queer-friendly. Inserting a “girlfriend (or boyfriend!)” is certainly a nice inclusion, but it’s not much more than decorative if you don’t put in any other work. It also makes the chapter on gender roles and the emotional repression of men in our society look even more out of place-- where do trans individuals fit into this? Or non-binary individuals?

[Ashley Holstrom · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is the handbook I want given to college freshmen.

Corinne Fisher and Krystyna Hutchinson are here with a stellar collection of essays on sexuality in today's world. The book is broken up into sections: Shame, anatomy, sexy acts, relationships, sex ed, and the serious stuff: Sexual assault and abortion. It's a great guide for a sexual debut.

From 13 Fabulous Feminist Audiobooks at Book Riot.

[Kassie · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book is so important. I highly recommend EVERYONE read it, although there are trigger warnings for discussion of sexual abuse, rape, etc. so please be forewarned.

The two women who wrote this are a comedian duo who started a podcast a few years ago called "Guys We Fucked." It began as a an interview podcast, having one person per episode on who one of the girls had had sex with at least once. It's now grown into talking about all things sexual, from talking to a pimp, a person who has been raped, and answering emails about all sorts of crazy things in the sex realm.

This book is essentially that but in written form. It talks about self esteem and self worth, how to talk to your partner(s) about how to do it right for YOU, how to masturbate, as well as some of the darker shit like rape.

I cried. I laughed out loud. I had to hide this book while I worked but couldn't put it down long enough to leave it at home. It was amazing. Just read it.

[Melody · Rating 2 out of 5]

I was good with this for most of it. I liked how the authors were so non-shamey. Until they came to polyamory, which they don't think can ever work for anyone, ever. *yawn* Darlings, I've been poly since before you were born, and it can work. Without my sacrificing my self-respect, whilst feeling that my back is well and truly covered. That being said, kudos for the chapters on abortion and consent.

[Ashley Jacobs · Rating 4 out of 5]

Overall I really enjoyed this book and appreciated the wide array of subjects it covered. Not only did it touch on basically every popular issue/subject surrounding sex, it was also filled with fun facts encompassing other subjects. For example, did you know that boy scouts was founded to distract boys from tugging at their own dicks?! I had no idea. It was also news to me that in my state, Indiana, it’s illegal for a man to be sexually aroused in public? Crazy facts.

I wasn’t familiar with either author before listening to this book, but I greatly respect the work that they do and look forwarding to checking out their podcast. These ladies are so smart, resilient, driven, and also very funny. I laughed out loud several times throughout this book. I would definitely go and watch them perform at a comedy gig. I love the messages they promote in this book, the central being empowerment and self-love. I think we could all use more of that these days. “This is more than a book about how to step away from the Ben & Jerry’s of “Jeff won’t text you back”. This is a book that will help you to be a person who would never let Jeff have enough power over you to open that pint to begin with. Unless you just want a snack, then that’s fine.”

This book can serve as a great conversation starter in regards to topics that many people are uncomfortable with. If we were all encouraged to be more open about our sexual experiences, especially issues, then we would feel a lot less shame towards those topics. Having the ability to talk about these things and just let them out helps immensely. To sum that up well, “Secrecy feeds shame. When released into the open air, shame loses its power. Own your feelings, thoughts, opinions, viewpoints and self-worth. To feel shame, you must relinquish ownership of those things, which is easy if you have never felt true ownership over them in the first place. But how do we lose ownership of the very things that make us who we are?”

Highly recommend this book!

[Lexi Goyette · Rating 4 out of 5]

As someone who has listened to every episode of Guys We F*cked religiously, I preordered this book immediately. Corinne Fisher and Krystyna Hutchinson have kept me sane on my daily commutes to work, which ranged from last year's 2.5 hours each way to my current 45 minutes each way.

This book is definitely targeted toward fans of the GWF podcast. Non-listeners will still be able to follow along with the anecdotes and connections, but would simply not enjoy it as much as listeners.

I preferred Krystyna's sections because they felt less self-indulgent than Corinne's. The writing is decent, about as good as any other comedian memoir/book, just as I expected. "[Name] and I" vs. "[Name] and me" was misused quite a bit, which irks me to no end, but it seems that everyone is screwing that up these days -- plus, that's the job of the editor/publisher to catch those mistakes.

The chapters cover topics that have been talked about on the podcast, but with greater detail. If you pick up this book, expect to read about farting in front of your significant other, threesomes, rape, abortion, and everything in between. Corinne and Krystyna won't spare you any details, but what else would you expect from them?

[Tena · Rating 4 out of 5]

I won this ARC in a GOODREADS giveaway. Dang, Corinne Fisher has got a way of putting it all out there! I never heard her podcasts, but now... Anyways, after I finished reading this, I showed it to my (adult) daughter who rolled her eyes at me until I read two lines from a middle chapter. She grabbed it and I haven't seen either since! Guess which chapter!

[K.D. McQuain · Rating 3 out of 5]

It wasn't exactly what i was expecting, but I suppose I could have listened to their podcast first. That being said, I enjoyed the book and laughed out loud a few times from the anecdotes,. We all have funny, embarrassing, disturbing stories about our sexual experiences, its nice to see a group of women opening up about them the way my asshole friends always seem to whether you want them to or not.

[Veraveida · Rating 1 out of 5]

I bought this book after listening to their podcast (and got to listening to their podcast after listening to JRE #1042).

This book is a mile-wide, inch-deep version of what I have heard of their podcast. It touches on a variety of subjects, and goes into very little detail of each. I'm not 100% sure, but I think the entire intro to their TED talk (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M2-K7...) can also be found within the pages of this book.

It was a bit painful to push through to the end. Here and there I found myself wondering: "Did they have a minimum word count requirement? Why is this even in here?"

Admittedly, a large part of the reason I bought this book at all was to support Krystyna Hutchinson & Corinne Fisher, as I appreciate a lot of what they're doing, especially providing positive female role models in a society severely lacking.

[Casey · Rating 2 out of 5]

This book irritated me, and I can't quite put my finger on why. There is good--albeit basic--information here, but the presentation is off. This almost seemed like it was written by the girl on the subway who talks loudly on the phone about her sex life, just so you know how cool she is. That said, the authors are not experts and don't pretend to be. If you're looking for an introductory primer, this is probably a good start (although I found the authors a little blasé and neglectful in their discussions of non-heteronormative relationships); it would, as another reviewer suggests, be a great read for college freshmen or young feminists. If, however, you're looking to go deeper (pun 100% intended), look elsewhere. Anyone with any familiarity with feminist thought or relationship studies will know all of this already.

[arireadsthings · Rating 2 out of 5]

This is a great book if you’re new to sex/feminism and you’re a heterosexual female. If you’re anything like me (i.e. queer and well versed in my sexual knowledge), this book will be myopic and a waste of time. I gave this book 2 stars for the educational aspects that might help someone who hasn’t had the privilege to learn the things I have, but for the most part, this book could have been so much more. They made an effort to be inclusive, occasionally throwing in things like “if you’re a heterosexual woman”, but they really never made any effort to talk about anything other than straight women. Not to mention, they spent all this time saying, essentially, “don’t yuck other peoples’ yums” and then spent an entire section bashing people in open relationships. Overall, some good info for beginners, but this one missed the mark for me.

[Kirsten · Rating 2 out of 5]

Some very good points, but there are books that go into more depth on the same topics. The podcast is good.

[Amber Rivera · Rating 5 out of 5]

I won this book through a HarperOne giveaway for an unbiased opinion. I've never listened to the Guys We F*ucked podcast (or any podcast for that matter), but I did enjoy this book. I liked that the authors alternated the chapters and included their avatar picture in the beginning of each--it made it easier to follow. I actually learned a few things (I had no clue there were different shaped lady parts!). I'm not big on using curse words to just be provocative, but I understood the purpose of utilizing harsh words (definitely emphasized the straight talk aspect). I liked the artistry of the chapters with email headlines, it was a different way to present information. They not only talked about the amusing aspects of sex, but also the more serious topics (it was great that they added a resources section) which I appreciated it. After reading this book I think I would definitely enjoy listening to their podcast. The book was an easy, fast read that was honest from the beginning to the end. I would definitely recommend it to others--in fact I'll be mailing it to my best friend.

[Sarneet · Rating 3 out of 5]

Random book I found in a book exchange in Recklinghausen.

Was a cute, fun and easy read. I appreciated both writers’ insights even though I didn’t know of them previously. Loved how honest and frank it was. No huge insights but I liked reading about their experiences navigating their sex lives and how they developed their self confidence + their experiences hearing stories from their audience through their podcast.

Was a bit surprised at the close mindedness on their chapter about non monogamy though, considering how open minded they seemed in other chapters about people’s choices. A bit unfortunate. A bit preachy there in a negative way, as they try to generalize their experience to the whole world of non monogamy.

[Helen · Rating 5 out of 5]

Funny. Sharp. Honest. Mature. This is a much more succinct voice of the women behind Guys We F*cked: The Anti Slut-Shaming Podcast. This is the kind of book that should be mandatory for all teens. And adults. It's smart and sassy without ever feeling patronising. If I could give this book a standing ovation, I would.

[Emily Ashlin · Rating 5 out of 5]

This was an easy and quick read. This book is something I think all middle school, high school, and college aged individuals should experience. Shame has always played a big part in the way I view my own sexuality and this book and the podcast really opened my eyes. This is just a small glimpse into the incredibly informative and liberating world of the Guys We Fucked podcast.

[Jenny Claffey · Rating 1 out of 5]

Truly generic neo-lib feminist drivel. Zero new ideas, some semi humorous stories from Hutchinson but Fisher's endless uneducated applause for Hilary Clinton and railing on the "straight white man" is boring and extremely luke warm takes. I wish the book was more centred around their earlier podcasts based on modern sex - that's where both flourish in my opinion.

[Lubinka Dimitrova · Rating 5 out of 5]

At last a refreshingly honest, no bullshit approach to the reality of being a woman, with all our insecurities, problems, desires, questions and daring explorations. I'm really glad that I concluded a great year of books in the best possible way.

[India · Rating 4 out of 5]

I don’t think Corinne and Krystyna are particularly spectacular book-writers, but that didn’t stop me from absolutely enjoying this book and thinking a lot of the content was important. I love their voices, views, and comedy so much and their podcast has been a part of my life for a long time now.

[Sarah Danielle Cooper · Rating 4 out of 5]

Read for book club and look forward to discussion. I found this very empowering. Both women are very confident and speak frankly and we need more of that. Having not listened to their podcast, the stories were fresh for me. Wish schools would implement their sex education!

[rachel jayn · Rating 4 out of 5]

I’m a massive fan of Corinne and Krystyna’s work, and a long time listener! I’m so thrilled that I finally got to reading this book. This is definitely a handbook that I wish everyone could read, and I’m dying to see Corinne and Krystyna in a show soon!

[Melissa · Rating 5 out of 5]

Excellent book. Funny and informative.

[Timea · Rating 5 out of 5]

@ines go read this!! 💋

[Grace · Rating 5 out of 5]

Huge fan of the podcast and the book did not disappoint. Since starting to listen to the podcast I've really changed my outlook on many things - how I interact with others, how I treat other women, how much I know about myself, how to own everything I think and feeling. They really are awesome. So happy this book is finally out and really very pleased with their success. Empowering and brilliant women who deserve their place teaching the world to be a better, more positive place.

[Julie · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book is hilarious and informative. There were some boring parts, but overall it was a quick and interesting read. I recommend listening to their podcast cause it's hilarious as well. They go through their personal experiences with sex and also add in just a bunch of facts with sources. I really enjoyed this and I felt like I learned some things. Their sex lives were actually really interesting and hearing their POVs made me feel a little better about myself lol. Definitely recommend.

[Eliott · Rating 2 out of 5]

Alright so this book really pissed me off. It started off great; it was really funny and informative, their stories are relatable and they seemed like very down to earth people (I’ve never listened to the podcast, for context). I really liked it! But about 40% of the way through, not sure what changed but the jokes started getting less and less appropriate. I’m all for dark humour and making light of situations, but joking about child sexual assault is not even a little bit funny and should not be done unless you are a CSA survivor and use humour to cope. This happened multiple times throughout the book. Not ok. There was also a section that really got under my skin, when one of them was talking about polyarmory. She said something along the lines of being able to understand pedophiles because they can’t control what’s in their brain, but she can’t wrap her head around someone’s ability to love more than one person at a time. What the actual fuck? I understand she’s entitled to her own opinion; if she doesn’t understand polyamory then that’s fine, she doesn’t have to. But to say that being a pedofile is more normal than being poly is an absolutely disgusting statement to make. I almost DNF’d right then but I was so close to the end that I made myself finish.

So that’s my rant. This book is genuinely funny, so I wouldn’t not recommend it. But be aware that you’re in for some really inappropriate jokes if you do read it

[Phoebe Davies-Lloyd · Rating 2 out of 5]

Underwhelming, but expectedly so. Corinne and Krystyna have a lot to say, but much of it has already been said in the podcast, so the book reads as a disjointed scrapbook of recycled material.

That said, if I were 10 years younger I may be more inclined to see C & K as bastion's of sexual agency and positivity, but instead I found myself glazing over the unstructured prose.

The strength of the podcast is in the variety of guests who would otherwise be overlooked by most mainstream podcasts and allow the listeners an insight into a spectrum of different lifestyles, challenges, relationships - they surely have goldmine of these contacts at their fingertips - however this element is sidestepped in favour of personal tidbits.

I like the podcast and will keep listening, it's easy to see how excited C & K are about the book, I can't help but think that their editors let them down on this one.

[Erin · Rating 2 out of 5]

I'm not sure what my expectations were for this book. I had never listened to their podcast. Overall, it's based on pure opinion with facts thrown in here and there. It covers a lot of subjects although not super in depth (hey, did you know you should use lube with buttsex?! I must have read this 49 times. Also, apparently buttsex is the epitome of boring straight people sex). Maybe I had issue with it because it was hard for me to relate to their out-going, bar hook-up, super white/hetero/mono relationships. I hated the two pages on open-relationships in the book. I almost didn't finish reading it because of this. I appreciated the frankness and some of it was great in small pieces. I can see why it's gotten 4+ stars from certain folks, but overall I do not recommend it.

[Chrissy · Rating 3 out of 5]

Really had me at the start and really lost me at the end. I wish I could give half stars 3 1/2 would be perfect. I'm a fan of these two beautiful ladies' podcast which is why I picked up this book. I found the beginning to be witty and informative and I did a lot of head nodding and agreeing and highlighting. And then the back half felt like they were speaking to a 15 year old. And maybe that is who they wanted to target but it lost my engagement and there was a lot of skimming to the end.

In conclusion I love the Guys we F*cked podcast and I recommend every one go listen to it. And I don't regret purchasing this book in support of them, but it was kind of meh.