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تنها نژادی که میتواند بدون چاپلوسی غذا سرو کند، نژاد ایتالیایی است. فرانسویها با خوشحالی سرتاسر کراواتتان را سس میپاشند، بدون نوک سوزنی عذرخواهی و در همان لحظه با زبان مادریشان شما را نفرین میکنند. چینیها به هیچوجه با شما حرف نمیزنند و یونانیها اصلا به ذهنشان خطور نمیکند که از یک ساعت قبل از تحویل منوی غذا، بیخیال حرف زدن بشوند. آمریکاییها به شدت در عذابند که به شما بفهمانند آنها در واقع اصلا پیشخدمت نیستند، بلکه هنرپیشههایی از کار بیکارند. بعد مشغول از بر خواندن غذاهای مخصوص میشوند، انگار که برای آزمون هنرپیشگی نمایش اجرا میکنند. انگلیسیها بسیار تمایل دارند با شما وارد گفتگویی طولانی شوند و این گمان را در شما ایجاد میکنند که باید به جای همراهتان، با آنها شام بخورید و اما آلمانیها... آخرین بار کی در یک رستوران آلمانی غذا خوردید؟
318 pages, Paperback
First published January 1, 2006
269 people are currently reading
2604 people want to read
About the author
Jeffrey Archer
659 books12.4k followersJeffrey is published in 114 countries and more than 47 languages, with more than 750,000 5* reviews with international sales passing 275 million copies.
He is the only author ever to have been a number one bestseller in fiction (nineteen times), short stories (four times) and non-fiction (The Prison Diaries).
Jeffrey has been married for 53 years to Dame Mary Archer DBE. They have two sons, William and James, three grandsons and two granddaughters, and divide their time between homes in London, Cambridge and Mallorca.
He is the only author ever to have been a number one bestseller in fiction (nineteen times), short stories (four times) and non-fiction (The Prison Diaries).
Jeffrey has been married for 53 years to Dame Mary Archer DBE. They have two sons, William and James, three grandsons and two granddaughters, and divide their time between homes in London, Cambridge and Mallorca.
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 465 reviews
October 13, 2025
Prison gruel compared to his past fare!
I'm not suggesting for a second that Sir Jeffrey Archer shouldn't have been in prison or that he didn't deserve his all expenses paid vacation courtesy of the UK taxpayer. But, on the other hand, if he felt he was served some lemons then you have to give him credit for preparing some lemonade that he could sell to his remaining fans after he was released.
CAT O'NINE TALES includes twelve short stories, nine of which were borrowed (stolen?) and then embellished from his fellow inmate cronies and three of which were original (and, if I do say so, the least interesting of the twelve). While they do have a certain ring of truth and are interesting, in the sense that they have ironic and sometimes mildly humorous endings, the story-telling is, to say the least, pedestrian. Especially when it's compared to the work that Archer produced when in such stellar novels as Kane and Abel.
Had this collection been "pure" fiction, tales such as "Maestro" which regaled us with the escapades of an Italian restaurateur, busted for evading a spectacular chunk of tax, might have struck the reader as picaresque, perhaps humorous portrayals of almost impish rogues. But, since we now know the story is based on a true-life criminal who sought to extensively line his own pockets at the expense of his fellow citizens and more honest taxpayers, it's tough to generate any sympathy for the character. As a result, it's also difficult to feel any real enjoyment in reading the story. The same comment about his characters generating any real interest or sympathy might be levelled at virtually every story in the collection.
Only moderately enjoyable and mercifully short and easy to read, CAT O'NINE TALES is probably the output of an author past his prime who should retire gracefully. I wonder if he's getting a pension from the British government in spite of his stint behind bars?
Paul Weiss
I'm not suggesting for a second that Sir Jeffrey Archer shouldn't have been in prison or that he didn't deserve his all expenses paid vacation courtesy of the UK taxpayer. But, on the other hand, if he felt he was served some lemons then you have to give him credit for preparing some lemonade that he could sell to his remaining fans after he was released.
CAT O'NINE TALES includes twelve short stories, nine of which were borrowed (stolen?) and then embellished from his fellow inmate cronies and three of which were original (and, if I do say so, the least interesting of the twelve). While they do have a certain ring of truth and are interesting, in the sense that they have ironic and sometimes mildly humorous endings, the story-telling is, to say the least, pedestrian. Especially when it's compared to the work that Archer produced when in such stellar novels as Kane and Abel.
Had this collection been "pure" fiction, tales such as "Maestro" which regaled us with the escapades of an Italian restaurateur, busted for evading a spectacular chunk of tax, might have struck the reader as picaresque, perhaps humorous portrayals of almost impish rogues. But, since we now know the story is based on a true-life criminal who sought to extensively line his own pockets at the expense of his fellow citizens and more honest taxpayers, it's tough to generate any sympathy for the character. As a result, it's also difficult to feel any real enjoyment in reading the story. The same comment about his characters generating any real interest or sympathy might be levelled at virtually every story in the collection.
Only moderately enjoyable and mercifully short and easy to read, CAT O'NINE TALES is probably the output of an author past his prime who should retire gracefully. I wonder if he's getting a pension from the British government in spite of his stint behind bars?
Paul Weiss
March 20, 2018
This book in itself is pretty decent. What is sad though is the fact that out of 12 stories, only the 9 which were inspired by real life incidents were worth reading. “Don’t Drink the Water” and “The Alibi” were my personal favorite. The complexity of the plot, the minute details and the pacing was brilliant. It is the kind of story that leaves you with a huge smile on your smile because you feel that your time has been well spent. The other 7 stories varied from very interesting, to fairly decent to mind numbingly boring. The worst part was the 3 stories of Archer’s own creation. “In The Eye of the Beholder” especially catches your attention.
Overall, this being my first Jeffrey Archer book, I am fairly impressed and perhaps I will read more of his works. Maybe his full length novels are better?
Overall, this being my first Jeffrey Archer book, I am fairly impressed and perhaps I will read more of his works. Maybe his full length novels are better?
July 7, 2015
"The Man Who Robbed His Own Post Office" 5 stars
This is one of those tales that could have ended in about 5 spots. The difference with this one is that Archer acknowledges it! I think that’s infinitely clever. He tells a tricky little tale in which our anti-heroes have seemingly no choice except to do what they do, which is wrong, but...sometimes you can’t help it!
I genuinely liked Chris and Sue. They seemed to be upstanding people and had a terrifically ingrained sense of justice. They just had a run of bad luck. I was infinitely pleased they ended up with a fish n crisps shop, especially since I am American and the closest I can come to that is Long John Silver’s, so it seems almost romantic in my eyes.
"Maestro" 4 stars
This was a fun read. One of the pitfalls of audio-ing a book as opposed to reading is that you can’t flip back. I don’t remember the restaurant owner’s name, but I applaud his “work around” attitude! I also applaud Archer’s introduction to the tale.
"Don't Drink the Water" 5 stars
This is my favorite so far! A rich man thinks his wife is going to sue for divorce (and half of his millions) so sets about methodically killing her slowly. Backfires in the most satisfying way possible! My one regret is not knowing if she was really filing for divorce. She may not have been.
"It Can't Be October Already" 3 stars
This was a cute story and reminded me of hobos and Hooverville residents after the Great Depression. Three squares and a cot is all any simple man needs in the winter, yes? Sad ending, though. :*(
"The Red King" 3 stars
This guy's crime was clever, I just didn't love the story. I had not realized until this entry that Archer actually collected these tales while incarcerated himself. If that's so, how can he end the tale the way he does? O_o
"The Wisdom of Solomon" 5 stars
This little tale seems a waste until the very last few sentences. In my house, when our children are going to share something, one divides and the other chooses. Who knew we were so wise? :D
"Know What I Mean?" 3 stars
I'm not sure why this is the title. This is the story of a man who is a criminal through and through, but is loved, for all that, by a good and wise woman. Maybe that's it! Anyway, it made me sad on her behalf and I marveled at, not only her ability to forgive, but to accept and make allowances for his criminal tendencies without giving in to them herself.
"Charity Begin at Home" 3 stars
This was just a bit too convoluted and the ending was a little too "wrapped with a bow" for my taste.
"The Alibi" 5 stars
This was cleverly told and I like the idea that even though he had an "alibi" and should have gotten away with it...justice won out. Well, kind of.
"A Greek Tragedy" 1 star
Not only didn't I like this little tale, I also didn't really get the point. Until now each has had a twist or zinger at the end, al la M. Night Shamalayan, but this one did not.
"The Commissioner" 2 stars
This had a sort of twist at the end, but otherwise it wasn't very good and certainly not exciting.
"In the Eye of the Beholder" not sure
I love that he loved her, not in spite of, but because of, her weight, but I don't know if I find that offensive or endearing. The fact that Archer found it interesting enough to write a tale about makes it seem...almost wrong.
This is one of those tales that could have ended in about 5 spots. The difference with this one is that Archer acknowledges it! I think that’s infinitely clever. He tells a tricky little tale in which our anti-heroes have seemingly no choice except to do what they do, which is wrong, but...sometimes you can’t help it!
I genuinely liked Chris and Sue. They seemed to be upstanding people and had a terrifically ingrained sense of justice. They just had a run of bad luck. I was infinitely pleased they ended up with a fish n crisps shop, especially since I am American and the closest I can come to that is Long John Silver’s, so it seems almost romantic in my eyes.
"Maestro" 4 stars
This was a fun read. One of the pitfalls of audio-ing a book as opposed to reading is that you can’t flip back. I don’t remember the restaurant owner’s name, but I applaud his “work around” attitude! I also applaud Archer’s introduction to the tale.
"Don't Drink the Water" 5 stars
This is my favorite so far! A rich man thinks his wife is going to sue for divorce (and half of his millions) so sets about methodically killing her slowly. Backfires in the most satisfying way possible! My one regret is not knowing if she was really filing for divorce. She may not have been.
"It Can't Be October Already" 3 stars
This was a cute story and reminded me of hobos and Hooverville residents after the Great Depression. Three squares and a cot is all any simple man needs in the winter, yes? Sad ending, though. :*(
"The Red King" 3 stars
This guy's crime was clever, I just didn't love the story. I had not realized until this entry that Archer actually collected these tales while incarcerated himself. If that's so, how can he end the tale the way he does? O_o
"The Wisdom of Solomon" 5 stars
This little tale seems a waste until the very last few sentences. In my house, when our children are going to share something, one divides and the other chooses. Who knew we were so wise? :D
"Know What I Mean?" 3 stars
I'm not sure why this is the title. This is the story of a man who is a criminal through and through, but is loved, for all that, by a good and wise woman. Maybe that's it! Anyway, it made me sad on her behalf and I marveled at, not only her ability to forgive, but to accept and make allowances for his criminal tendencies without giving in to them herself.
"Charity Begin at Home" 3 stars
This was just a bit too convoluted and the ending was a little too "wrapped with a bow" for my taste.
"The Alibi" 5 stars
This was cleverly told and I like the idea that even though he had an "alibi" and should have gotten away with it...justice won out. Well, kind of.
"A Greek Tragedy" 1 star
Not only didn't I like this little tale, I also didn't really get the point. Until now each has had a twist or zinger at the end, al la M. Night Shamalayan, but this one did not.
"The Commissioner" 2 stars
This had a sort of twist at the end, but otherwise it wasn't very good and certainly not exciting.
"In the Eye of the Beholder" not sure
I love that he loved her, not in spite of, but because of, her weight, but I don't know if I find that offensive or endearing. The fact that Archer found it interesting enough to write a tale about makes it seem...almost wrong.
July 26, 2013
بينما كان جيفري ارتشر (المؤلف) سجينا على مدى عامين ..
ومتنقلا بين خمسة سجون مختلفة.. التقط أفكار هذه القصص القصيرة..
تسع من هذه القصص التقطها من السجن وهي قصص من الواقع .. وتم نشرها بعد تنقحيها .. وتنميقها .. وتغيير أسماء أصحابها .
أما القصص الثلاث الأخرى فهي فهي من الواقع أيضا.. والتقطها من أثينا ولندن وروما ..
قصص مشوقة جدا ..
تتراوح بين الذكاء والدهاء والحظ كما في قصص "الملك الأحمر" و "أتفهم قصدي " و "المأمور " ..
والمفاجأة في النهاية كما في " لاتشرب الماء " :) .
أعجبتني قصة " المايسترو " :)
من القصص المفضلة لدي أيضا.. قصة "عين المحب " وقصة " حكيم الزمان" ..
خفيف وحلو أنهيته فقط بجلستي قراءة دامت بمجموعها ثلاث ساعات .
أنصح الجميع بقراءته .
ـــــــــــــــــــــــــــــــــــــ
رابط لتحميل الرواية :
http://www.4shared.com/office/Ji-WuWz...
ومتنقلا بين خمسة سجون مختلفة.. التقط أفكار هذه القصص القصيرة..
تسع من هذه القصص التقطها من السجن وهي قصص من الواقع .. وتم نشرها بعد تنقحيها .. وتنميقها .. وتغيير أسماء أصحابها .
أما القصص الثلاث الأخرى فهي فهي من الواقع أيضا.. والتقطها من أثينا ولندن وروما ..
قصص مشوقة جدا ..
تتراوح بين الذكاء والدهاء والحظ كما في قصص "الملك الأحمر" و "أتفهم قصدي " و "المأمور " ..
والمفاجأة في النهاية كما في " لاتشرب الماء " :) .
أعجبتني قصة " المايسترو " :)
من القصص المفضلة لدي أيضا.. قصة "عين المحب " وقصة " حكيم الزمان" ..
خفيف وحلو أنهيته فقط بجلستي قراءة دامت بمجموعها ثلاث ساعات .
أنصح الجميع بقراءته .
ـــــــــــــــــــــــــــــــــــــ
رابط لتحميل الرواية :
http://www.4shared.com/office/Ji-WuWz...
April 29, 2013
Jeffrey Archer's short stories are amazing. The best thing about them is that each story has that unusual quality about them that makes them unique. They're all extremely different and I like that a lot. Most short stories start to get a little repetitious after a while but Archer kept me turning the pages till the end.
April 28, 2013
كملحوظات سريعة
1- أول مرة أقرا لجيفري آرتشر وكانت قرائتي ليه مصادفة ولكنها لن تكون الاخيرة
2- اسلوب الحكاية عند جيفري رائع جدا ومشوق بحيث انك مش هتعرف تسيب المجموعة الا لما تخلصها كلها
3- القصص دي اتكتبت في السجن اه جيفري ردّ سجون :D
الغريب انه كان في مجلس العموم البريطاني وبعدها اتسجن والقصص دي منها 9 عرفها من السجن
4- لحد دلوقتي مش فاهم معنى عنوان المجموعة مفيش اي قصة من القصص ال 12 باسم قط وتسعة كلاب فيه 9 حكايات من السجن فدول يمكن الكلاب :D
بس فين القط !!!!!
5- اغلب القصص تحايل ضريبي !!! وده بيطرح نقط كتير حول قانون الضرائب هناك شكله بيلسع اكتر من الضريبة العقارية عندنا :D
6- نصيحة اقرأ لجيفري هتستمتع جدااا :)
7- اكتر قصة فيهم أثرت فيا هي قصة ( لا يمكن أن يكون اكتوبر قد عاد بهذه السرعة ) قصة محزنة :(
1- أول مرة أقرا لجيفري آرتشر وكانت قرائتي ليه مصادفة ولكنها لن تكون الاخيرة
2- اسلوب الحكاية عند جيفري رائع جدا ومشوق بحيث انك مش هتعرف تسيب المجموعة الا لما تخلصها كلها
3- القصص دي اتكتبت في السجن اه جيفري ردّ سجون :D
الغريب انه كان في مجلس العموم البريطاني وبعدها اتسجن والقصص دي منها 9 عرفها من السجن
4- لحد دلوقتي مش فاهم معنى عنوان المجموعة مفيش اي قصة من القصص ال 12 باسم قط وتسعة كلاب فيه 9 حكايات من السجن فدول يمكن الكلاب :D
بس فين القط !!!!!
5- اغلب القصص تحايل ضريبي !!! وده بيطرح نقط كتير حول قانون الضرائب هناك شكله بيلسع اكتر من الضريبة العقارية عندنا :D
6- نصيحة اقرأ لجيفري هتستمتع جدااا :)
7- اكتر قصة فيهم أثرت فيا هي قصة ( لا يمكن أن يكون اكتوبر قد عاد بهذه السرعة ) قصة محزنة :(
August 5, 2023
My late uncle recommended Jeffrey Archer, a business-savvy author, to me in the 90’s and I’ve tried to read all of his work ever since. Still have several to read (my TBR stack will thank me) and a few more to buy (my dedicated Jeffrey Archer shelf won’t thank me).
This is his 7th collection of short stories out of 11 he’s written to date, and like the others, I enjoyed his trademark twists towards the end of each one. What I liked most was that several of the stores were written in 1st person and were inspired during his time in prison several years ago.
Highly recommended for fans of the short story genre and for those who enjoy settings based in England.
This is his 7th collection of short stories out of 11 he’s written to date, and like the others, I enjoyed his trademark twists towards the end of each one. What I liked most was that several of the stores were written in 1st person and were inspired during his time in prison several years ago.
Highly recommended for fans of the short story genre and for those who enjoy settings based in England.
April 9, 2019
Adını ilk kez duyduğum İngiliz yazar yaşamının uzunca bir süresini Lordlar ve Avam Kamaraları'nda geçirdikten sonra iki yıl boyunca çeşitli hapishanelerde yatmış. Bu süreçte mahkumlardan dinlediği olayları da öyküleştirmiş. İhtiyatla elime aldığım kitabı keyifle bitirdim. Roald Dahlvari öyküleri seviyorsanız okumalısınız...
May 21, 2020
After being released from imprisonment, Jeffrey Archer put together this pretty solid book of short stories based on, or transposed from people he met on the 'inside'. 6 out of 12
March 22, 2020
Funny for these times..
March 2, 2008
Twelve stories, nine of which ‘Lord’ Archer takes the liberty of borrowing and embellishing from fellow inmates while in lockdown. That’s right, our beleaguered nobleman apparently found a way to fall from the lofty grace of membership in the ranks of Parliament to becoming just another scumbag perjurer doing time. While Archer claims to have some interesting turns of fate within the book’s tales, reality again trumps fiction when you consider that this guy was paid for helping to draft ineffective and rotten legislation that landed a bunch of people in jail, and then when Archer arrives to the big house himself, he shamelessly takes their stories and publishes them when he’s released; the ultimate screwing. It’s somewhat re-assuring to discover that despite the sad state of affairs in American politics (in which the rap sheets of the disgusting transgressions of our House and Congress would be longer than an unabridged dictionary) our friends across the pond are still able to find equally shitty, imbecilic assholes of their own to put in office.
While author Jeffrey Archer is presumably a washed up old windbag and a thorough scoundrel, don’t let this reflect on the book, which was actually pretty decent. Sure, ‘pretty decent’ isn’t the type of glowing review I’m sure anyone is looking for, but on a scale of 0 to 10, with zero being the most repulsive writing known to man (something worse than On The Road) and ten being the pinnacle of written achievement, I’d give this a 5.01 (just a wee bit better than completely average). See, that puts it in perspective, that isn’t half bad, hell, that's a tiny bit better than half good!
Of the twelve stories, nine were inspired by tales Archer was told in prison, and the other three are stories of his own design. Pathetically, the tales which Archer lifted from others are the good ones, and his own three tales are the dregs of the collection, which immediately confirms the author is indeed a politician; his ability to rehash someone else’s decent story (and take credit for it) far outstrips his own abilities to produce something original of value. Archer’s paltry contributions to the collection include “The Wisdom of Solomon”, concerning a friend of the author getting hitched to a gold-digger and the resulting fiasco, “A Greek Tragedy”, which spells out the misfortune to befall a greek wedding, and “In The Eye of the Beholder”, which the back cover and introduction both claim to be the highlight of the collection, but is a candidate for the least interesting story within.
The other nine stories are generally mediocre, but readable, stuff. “The Man Who Robbed His Own Post Office” tells how a couple who have invested in their own post office branch are getting royally screwed (probably due to some zoning decision Archer was probably integral to) and take matters into their own hands to recoup the losses. “Maestro” is also completely pedestrian, about an Italian restaurateur busted for evading taxes, and this falls short of satisfying since this wop was probably holed up with Archer in Club Fed, his wealth and life of privilege continuing behind bars. “Don’t Drink the Water” was probably my favorite story within, a dude about to land a huge business contract in Russia discovers his wife has some shady plans of her own, to wait until he signs the paperwork and divorce him, thus getting half of this huge pay-off. Our main man thinks he has a plan worked out to counter this nefarious plot….. Easily the worst story within, and probably the worst story I’ve read in a long time, “It Can’t Be October Already”, about a stupid-ass Irishman. “The Red King” tells about the treachery of a conman and two opposed brothers intent on the completion of a rare chessboard, the first to locate the Red King inheriting the whole, priceless set. Finally, a story about smuggling and the folly of running afoul the Customs service appears, with “Know What I Mean?”. “Charity Begins at Home” tells the depraved story of a crooked accountant and a charity organizer, both of whom feel underappreciated for their services and decide to implement their own get-rich-quick scheme. “The Alibi” sets us straight on several issues; firstly, don’t shack up with your best friend’s ‘tart’ while he’s currently doing time, and second, that what the turnkeys say is considered gospel truth in a court of law, so don’t try using it against them unless you feel like tripling your sentence. “The Commissioner” was just a piece of garbage, unworthy of a more thorough description.
Overall, the book is decent, the stories drift along lazily, without anything close to profound to stumble on.
While author Jeffrey Archer is presumably a washed up old windbag and a thorough scoundrel, don’t let this reflect on the book, which was actually pretty decent. Sure, ‘pretty decent’ isn’t the type of glowing review I’m sure anyone is looking for, but on a scale of 0 to 10, with zero being the most repulsive writing known to man (something worse than On The Road) and ten being the pinnacle of written achievement, I’d give this a 5.01 (just a wee bit better than completely average). See, that puts it in perspective, that isn’t half bad, hell, that's a tiny bit better than half good!
Of the twelve stories, nine were inspired by tales Archer was told in prison, and the other three are stories of his own design. Pathetically, the tales which Archer lifted from others are the good ones, and his own three tales are the dregs of the collection, which immediately confirms the author is indeed a politician; his ability to rehash someone else’s decent story (and take credit for it) far outstrips his own abilities to produce something original of value. Archer’s paltry contributions to the collection include “The Wisdom of Solomon”, concerning a friend of the author getting hitched to a gold-digger and the resulting fiasco, “A Greek Tragedy”, which spells out the misfortune to befall a greek wedding, and “In The Eye of the Beholder”, which the back cover and introduction both claim to be the highlight of the collection, but is a candidate for the least interesting story within.
The other nine stories are generally mediocre, but readable, stuff. “The Man Who Robbed His Own Post Office” tells how a couple who have invested in their own post office branch are getting royally screwed (probably due to some zoning decision Archer was probably integral to) and take matters into their own hands to recoup the losses. “Maestro” is also completely pedestrian, about an Italian restaurateur busted for evading taxes, and this falls short of satisfying since this wop was probably holed up with Archer in Club Fed, his wealth and life of privilege continuing behind bars. “Don’t Drink the Water” was probably my favorite story within, a dude about to land a huge business contract in Russia discovers his wife has some shady plans of her own, to wait until he signs the paperwork and divorce him, thus getting half of this huge pay-off. Our main man thinks he has a plan worked out to counter this nefarious plot….. Easily the worst story within, and probably the worst story I’ve read in a long time, “It Can’t Be October Already”, about a stupid-ass Irishman. “The Red King” tells about the treachery of a conman and two opposed brothers intent on the completion of a rare chessboard, the first to locate the Red King inheriting the whole, priceless set. Finally, a story about smuggling and the folly of running afoul the Customs service appears, with “Know What I Mean?”. “Charity Begins at Home” tells the depraved story of a crooked accountant and a charity organizer, both of whom feel underappreciated for their services and decide to implement their own get-rich-quick scheme. “The Alibi” sets us straight on several issues; firstly, don’t shack up with your best friend’s ‘tart’ while he’s currently doing time, and second, that what the turnkeys say is considered gospel truth in a court of law, so don’t try using it against them unless you feel like tripling your sentence. “The Commissioner” was just a piece of garbage, unworthy of a more thorough description.
Overall, the book is decent, the stories drift along lazily, without anything close to profound to stumble on.
August 6, 2018
مجموعه داستانی که با استفاده از خاطرات گروهی از زندانیان نوشته شده است،
April 16, 2012
My rating is in actuality a 3.5 average..I just cannot justify giving this 4 stars so rounded down rather than up. 3.5 is more accurate based upon my reading, but 4 stars does not seem accurate. I love Jeffery Archer and consider him among the premier short story writers of our era. This collection however is not among his best short works that I have encountered. Don't get me wrong it is still a worthwhile read for Archer fans and short story enthusisats. The ironic thing is this collection contains 12 works, based upon prison and criminal themes. 9 of the 12 are based upon stories Archer gleaned during his own imprisonment while the other 3 are his own creations. the ironic thing is his 3 original stories were for me the least interesting of the collection. had this book contained only the 9 stories, I very well might have gone 4 stars although that would still be borderline at best. Archer is still brilliant and able to weave brilliantly detailed and descriptive scenes with both likeable and unlikeable characters in such a short stretch...but not up to the level I hold him!
01 The Man Who Robbed His Own Post Office- 2.5 stars
This falls somewhere between, it was OK and I liked it. A decent enough yarn about a man and wife who have a buisiness venture go south...in order to recoup their finances they debate and plot how to recoup their investment...how far would you go...how will they????
02 Maestro- 3 stars
This was a nice little spin (Pun intended) on money laundering.
03 Don't Drink The Water- 5 stars
I so totally enjoyed this one! Very cool story w/ an unfaithful spouse, a jilted mate, a potential divorce, a nice estate, a unique way to deal with a problem...and of course a nice little twist thrown in as well.
04 It can't be October Already- 4 stars
If not for a slightly disappointing ending, I may have gone up to 5 stars for this one.
05 The Red King- 5 stars
A very cool story of theft, deception and fraud...and still smelling like a rose. A brilliant read, for those who like an intense game of chess!
06 The Wisdom of Solomon- 4 stars
Now that is justice!
07 Know What I mean? - 3.5 stars
This was a cool little story about a guy who keeps looking for loopholes in the law, only to abondon his family time and time again so that he can return to jail. Can he ever go straight?
08 Charity Begins at Home- 4 stars
This was a very cool story. A seemingly law abiding citizen, and his female counterpart hatch a brilliant plot to hide money, not declare it on their taxes...and get away with it????
09 The Alibi- 3 stars
A very short tale...and semi enjoyable, made even moreso by it's shortness. A brilliant plan, a horrific revenge...but nothing ever goes as planned!
10 A Greek tragedy- 2 stars
This is likely my least favorite in this collection...perhaps the only thing that saved it from 1 star was that it was short enough to not make me hate it forever and ever!
11 The Commissioner- 4 stars
A brilliant read! Do ex-cons deserve a second chance (I know, of course they do!)? A police commissioner goes out on a limb to say that they do, then is faced with the chance to practice his preaching rather than just have it be good public relations. can this ex-con go straight...and if not how does one deal with it?
12 The Eye of the Beholder- 2 stars
Again not my favorite of this collection by a long shot...this just never generated any steam.
01 The Man Who Robbed His Own Post Office- 2.5 stars
This falls somewhere between, it was OK and I liked it. A decent enough yarn about a man and wife who have a buisiness venture go south...in order to recoup their finances they debate and plot how to recoup their investment...how far would you go...how will they????
02 Maestro- 3 stars
This was a nice little spin (Pun intended) on money laundering.
03 Don't Drink The Water- 5 stars
I so totally enjoyed this one! Very cool story w/ an unfaithful spouse, a jilted mate, a potential divorce, a nice estate, a unique way to deal with a problem...and of course a nice little twist thrown in as well.
04 It can't be October Already- 4 stars
If not for a slightly disappointing ending, I may have gone up to 5 stars for this one.
05 The Red King- 5 stars
A very cool story of theft, deception and fraud...and still smelling like a rose. A brilliant read, for those who like an intense game of chess!
06 The Wisdom of Solomon- 4 stars
Now that is justice!
07 Know What I mean? - 3.5 stars
This was a cool little story about a guy who keeps looking for loopholes in the law, only to abondon his family time and time again so that he can return to jail. Can he ever go straight?
08 Charity Begins at Home- 4 stars
This was a very cool story. A seemingly law abiding citizen, and his female counterpart hatch a brilliant plot to hide money, not declare it on their taxes...and get away with it????
09 The Alibi- 3 stars
A very short tale...and semi enjoyable, made even moreso by it's shortness. A brilliant plan, a horrific revenge...but nothing ever goes as planned!
10 A Greek tragedy- 2 stars
This is likely my least favorite in this collection...perhaps the only thing that saved it from 1 star was that it was short enough to not make me hate it forever and ever!
11 The Commissioner- 4 stars
A brilliant read! Do ex-cons deserve a second chance (I know, of course they do!)? A police commissioner goes out on a limb to say that they do, then is faced with the chance to practice his preaching rather than just have it be good public relations. can this ex-con go straight...and if not how does one deal with it?
12 The Eye of the Beholder- 2 stars
Again not my favorite of this collection by a long shot...this just never generated any steam.
April 28, 2013
اول قراءاتى لجيفرى آرتشر الذى اعجبت به منذ قرأت سيرته الذاتية الموجزة التى ذكرها ف مقدمة ذلك الكتاب حيث أشار إلى إنه استوحى قصص ذلك الكتاب من فترة وجوده بالسجن
لم تعجبنى كل القصص فقد تراوحت جمالها وروعتها الادبية بين ممتاز وجيد ومتوسط .. جاءت اكثر القصص جمالا " الرجل الذى سرق مكتب بريده " العنوان غريب لأول وهلة ولكن يتضح مغزاه إلا قبل نهاية القصة بقليل عندما ندرك ان مخالفة القانون احيانا تصبح الحل الوحيد للحصول ع الحق !
كذلك اعجبتنى " اعجبتنى رغم صغرها ، واعجبنى كثيراً ذكاء ماريو صاحب المطعم الذى استطاع خداع مفتش الضرائب عن طريق الغسالة !
واعجبتنى "لا تشرب الماء " .. كنت متوقعة نهايتها بعض الشئ .. فيجب ع المرء ان يكون حذراً عند حفر لأخيه فقد يسقط فيها معه ايضاً !
وكذلك " لا يمكن ان يكون اكتوبر قد عاد بهذه السرعه " قصيرة الحجم آلمتنى كثيرا .. فهناك من يريد القيام باى عمل مخالف للقانون لمجرد الدخول ف السجن والاحتماء به خلال الشتاء !
وبالرغم من ربكتها فقد اعجبتنى "الملك الاحمر " القصة التى اربكت عقلى كثيرا خلال قراءتها بسبب كثرة الاحداث بها .. والتى تتمثل ف الحكم ع شخص بالسجن من اجل ذنب لم يقترفه ف حين إنه ارتكب ذنب آخر اكبر ولم يعاقب بسببه !
و"حكيم الزمان " .. قد تجد ان كل الامور ضدك ولكن يجب عليك عدم الاستعجال فقد تأخذ حقك ع حين غرة !
و كذلك " عين المحب " التى ختم بها آرشر قصصه
لم تعجبنى كثيرا " اتفهم مقصدى " و "الاقربون اولى بالمعروف " و مأساة يونانية "
اعجبتنى كثيرا الرسومات السابقة لكل قصة والرسومات التى تخللت كل واحدة منها .. ذكرتنى برسومات وليد طاهر :))
ولا اعلم حتى الآن لماذا اختار المؤلف " قط وتسعة كلاب " عنوانا لذلك الكتاب !
لم تعجبنى كل القصص فقد تراوحت جمالها وروعتها الادبية بين ممتاز وجيد ومتوسط .. جاءت اكثر القصص جمالا " الرجل الذى سرق مكتب بريده " العنوان غريب لأول وهلة ولكن يتضح مغزاه إلا قبل نهاية القصة بقليل عندما ندرك ان مخالفة القانون احيانا تصبح الحل الوحيد للحصول ع الحق !
كذلك اعجبتنى " اعجبتنى رغم صغرها ، واعجبنى كثيراً ذكاء ماريو صاحب المطعم الذى استطاع خداع مفتش الضرائب عن طريق الغسالة !
واعجبتنى "لا تشرب الماء " .. كنت متوقعة نهايتها بعض الشئ .. فيجب ع المرء ان يكون حذراً عند حفر لأخيه فقد يسقط فيها معه ايضاً !
وكذلك " لا يمكن ان يكون اكتوبر قد عاد بهذه السرعه " قصيرة الحجم آلمتنى كثيرا .. فهناك من يريد القيام باى عمل مخالف للقانون لمجرد الدخول ف السجن والاحتماء به خلال الشتاء !
وبالرغم من ربكتها فقد اعجبتنى "الملك الاحمر " القصة التى اربكت عقلى كثيرا خلال قراءتها بسبب كثرة الاحداث بها .. والتى تتمثل ف الحكم ع شخص بالسجن من اجل ذنب لم يقترفه ف حين إنه ارتكب ذنب آخر اكبر ولم يعاقب بسببه !
و"حكيم الزمان " .. قد تجد ان كل الامور ضدك ولكن يجب عليك عدم الاستعجال فقد تأخذ حقك ع حين غرة !
و كذلك " عين المحب " التى ختم بها آرشر قصصه
لم تعجبنى كثيرا " اتفهم مقصدى " و "الاقربون اولى بالمعروف " و مأساة يونانية "
اعجبتنى كثيرا الرسومات السابقة لكل قصة والرسومات التى تخللت كل واحدة منها .. ذكرتنى برسومات وليد طاهر :))
ولا اعلم حتى الآن لماذا اختار المؤلف " قط وتسعة كلاب " عنوانا لذلك الكتاب !
January 28, 2019
IF you LOVE a book with some short stories right before bed, then this is for you!
IF you LOVE a book that has plot twists, then this one if surely for you!
If you just want something different and yet mildly refreshing, then this is absolutely for you!
IF you enjoy sitting around telling stories and tales with friends, THEN READ THIS!
This was fun before bed. A short story a night, but I really, really, REALLY like to get to know my characters and that is not feasible in this type of short story. You get to know them, sure, but they are not well developed. It was different, and I think I needed that after a book hangover, but this is not something that I would read often.
IF you LOVE a book that has plot twists, then this one if surely for you!
If you just want something different and yet mildly refreshing, then this is absolutely for you!
IF you enjoy sitting around telling stories and tales with friends, THEN READ THIS!
This was fun before bed. A short story a night, but I really, really, REALLY like to get to know my characters and that is not feasible in this type of short story. You get to know them, sure, but they are not well developed. It was different, and I think I needed that after a book hangover, but this is not something that I would read often.
June 3, 2017
مجموعة قصصية لكاتب وروائي يمتاز اسلوبه بالمفاجآت والدهشة. ة التشويق. المؤلف كان عضؤ مجلس العموم البريطاني ومستشار للمرأة الجديدية رئيسة وزراء بريطانيا عن حكومة حزب المحافظين . وكان عضو مجلس اللوردات وكل هذا لم يشفع له عندما ارتكب بعض السلوكيات التي يعاقب عليها القانون وحكم عليه بالسجن وامضى عامين في الحبس وهو الشخصية القوية والجريئة والمحاورة لكن الحماقات والقدر ادخلته السجن وفي السجن وظف ارشر مهاراته فالتقط تسع قصص واقعية لسجناء معه و حولها الى سرد جميل مشوق عنوان المجموعة القصصية ليس عنوان لاحد تلقصص وانما رمزية ربما للقصص فالمجموعة تحتوي اثنى عشر قصة تتفاوت في حجمها تسع منها سمعها داخل السجن وهي قصص واقعية لاناس قابلهم وعايشهم وادخلتهم السجن والثلاث الاخريات وهي ايضاً واقعية حقيقية وانما عرفها من خارج السجنمأساة يونانية قصة حقيقية وقعت في اثينا و (حكيم الزمان) في لندن و(عين المحب) في روما معظم القصص عن الاحتيال و المكر الرجل الذي سرق مكتب البريد للبريد اهمية كبيرة في الثقافة البريطانية بل يعتبر من الرموز المهمة فتخيل ان يقدم احدهم على سرقته و للبريد وظائف مهمه فهو ليس مجرد استلام وتسليم الرسائل بل هو مؤسسة كبيرة تصرف رواتب التقاعد و مخصصات الاطفال و الطرود و رواتب بعض شرائح المجتمع فهو بمثابة بنك وقصة صاحب المطعم الايطالي ماريو الذي لم يستطعاان يكشف للرجال الضرائب مصادر امواله وكيف استطاع ان يشتري يخت وسيارة فراري ومنزل وفي حقيقة الامر دخل المطع لا يزيد عن سبعين الف جنية سنوياً. كذلك قصة رجل الاعمال المحترم الذي حاول قتل زوجته…
من يقرأ لجيفري آرشر ين��ذب الى اسلوبه و طريقة توظيفه للاحداث
من يقرأ لجيفري آرشر ين��ذب الى اسلوبه و طريقة توظيفه للاحداث
April 20, 2012
قط وتسعة كلاب ، 12 قصة حقيقة سمعها جيفرى آرتشر خلال تواجده بالسجن ما عدا 3 قصص كانت خارج السجن
ودا بيفسر اسم الكتاب قط وتسعة كلاب ! أعتقد ان المقصود بالرقم تسعة هو عدد القصص اللى سمعهم وهو فى السجن محبوس كالقط !! :)
القصص فيها عنصر المفاجأه اللى يشدك ويخليك منتبه لاخر كلمه فى القصة عشان تعرف نهايتها
احيانا كنت بحس بشوية ملل فى بداية القصة بس لما الاحداث توصل للنص الملل كان بيقل بالتدريج وببدأ اتشد عشان اعرف النهاية
اول مرة اقرأ لجيفرى ومش هتون الاخيرة ان شاء الله :))
ودا بيفسر اسم الكتاب قط وتسعة كلاب ! أعتقد ان المقصود بالرقم تسعة هو عدد القصص اللى سمعهم وهو فى السجن محبوس كالقط !! :)
القصص فيها عنصر المفاجأه اللى يشدك ويخليك منتبه لاخر كلمه فى القصة عشان تعرف نهايتها
احيانا كنت بحس بشوية ملل فى بداية القصة بس لما الاحداث توصل للنص الملل كان بيقل بالتدريج وببدأ اتشد عشان اعرف النهاية
اول مرة اقرأ لجيفرى ومش هتون الاخيرة ان شاء الله :))
July 13, 2013
As always Jeffrey Archer creates amazing stories. This is my first short stories each was entertaining, engrossing and hilarious. It is based on white collar crime. I could not put down this book it was so interesting and I would recommend to everyone. I say give it try you will not regret it.
March 8, 2018
This was an entertaining read. some of the stories I got a laugh from but a couple of the others were a little boring. I found that Mr. Archer did tell a good story though in a few of them.
November 22, 2025
Loved all the stories except one.
March 19, 2018
Listened to in audio format.
Lord Archer wrote Cat O'Nine Tales during his time at HMP Belmarsh and Ford Open Prison. Some of the stories were works of fiction and other stories were told to Jeffrey by his fellow prisoners.
I enjoyed some of these stories more than others.
My favourite story was Don't drink the water, but I also enjoyed The Alibi and It can't be October all ready.
However I did not enjoy In the Eye of the Beholder because it was offensive to overweight people. Lord Archer is a wonderful storyteller and I felt this story was beneath him.
Apart from that story Cat O'nine Tales was an excellent selection of short stories with a twist in the tail. I will listen to this book again and again.
Lord Archer wrote Cat O'Nine Tales during his time at HMP Belmarsh and Ford Open Prison. Some of the stories were works of fiction and other stories were told to Jeffrey by his fellow prisoners.
I enjoyed some of these stories more than others.
My favourite story was Don't drink the water, but I also enjoyed The Alibi and It can't be October all ready.
However I did not enjoy In the Eye of the Beholder because it was offensive to overweight people. Lord Archer is a wonderful storyteller and I felt this story was beneath him.
Apart from that story Cat O'nine Tales was an excellent selection of short stories with a twist in the tail. I will listen to this book again and again.
March 3, 2019
It was okay, an almost-fun read.
I was actually rereading it, expecting something like ‘A Quiver Full of Arrows’, but this comes nowhere close. Some mildly surprising endings. Just made me hungry for Roald Dahl stories.
I was actually rereading it, expecting something like ‘A Quiver Full of Arrows’, but this comes nowhere close. Some mildly surprising endings. Just made me hungry for Roald Dahl stories.
September 5, 2013
I was looking forward to reading short stories, because it goes at a good pace throughout and it has steady flow so that i can keep up with what's happening! because i am a bit slow. After reading this book i didn't know what to think of it. It was a very mature read, and it refers to problems that is happening in society today. Money problems. Jeffery Archer retrieved most of these stories while he was in prison. I read the stories: The Alibi (favourite), The Greek Tragedy and the man who robbed his own post office. I didn't really understand what was happening in the story 'the man who robbed his own post office'. His language use was to mature and i didn't understand what most of the words meant.
This book completes the category 'three short stories from one anthology'. I found this category interesting because every anthology is different with a general theme. Jeffery Archer's theme was the stories of how his cell mates ended up in jail. He tells their stories which i found quite cool, as he is using his status to tell their side, the truth of what happened.
There was no inspirational or funny quotes in these short stories i found it difficult to find one as it is just usual everyday talk. But i guess in 'The Alibi' my favourite would be "What a Muppet he was. He only had three weeks left to serve, when he- 'Pete' i tried again." I liked this quote because when Jeff was asking questions about Mick's story, he often forgot about what he was talking about and started to tell another story.
Something i learnt from these short stories, is to be good with money and if you are ever desperate at one point it's alright to ask for help instead of doing something illegal. You will most likely always get caught.
My favourite character in the story 'The Alibi' would have to be Mick. He gave that bit of humour to the seriousness of the book.
This book completes the category 'three short stories from one anthology'. I found this category interesting because every anthology is different with a general theme. Jeffery Archer's theme was the stories of how his cell mates ended up in jail. He tells their stories which i found quite cool, as he is using his status to tell their side, the truth of what happened.
There was no inspirational or funny quotes in these short stories i found it difficult to find one as it is just usual everyday talk. But i guess in 'The Alibi' my favourite would be "What a Muppet he was. He only had three weeks left to serve, when he- 'Pete' i tried again." I liked this quote because when Jeff was asking questions about Mick's story, he often forgot about what he was talking about and started to tell another story.
Something i learnt from these short stories, is to be good with money and if you are ever desperate at one point it's alright to ask for help instead of doing something illegal. You will most likely always get caught.
My favourite character in the story 'The Alibi' would have to be Mick. He gave that bit of humour to the seriousness of the book.
April 12, 2015
A nice collection of short stories; each depicting various facets of human nature like revenge, helplessness, greed etc.
Each story is unique and interesting and keeps the reader longing for more. The best of the lot is "The Wisdom of Solomon" where the twist is brought at the last moment and is entirely unexpected. Some other great stories are "The Man Who Robbed His Own Post Office", "Don't Drink the Water", "The Red King" and "The Maestro".
All in all a great book for enjoyable light reading.
Each story is unique and interesting and keeps the reader longing for more. The best of the lot is "The Wisdom of Solomon" where the twist is brought at the last moment and is entirely unexpected. Some other great stories are "The Man Who Robbed His Own Post Office", "Don't Drink the Water", "The Red King" and "The Maestro".
All in all a great book for enjoyable light reading.
July 7, 2015
أحب كثيراً أسلوب جيفري وأعتقد أنه من ضمن أفضل من كتب في الرواية، قرأت له روايتين طويلتين بوقت قياسي وأعجبت بأسلوبه من حينها، وهاهو يثبت لي أنه بارع جدا في القصص القصيرة أيضاً،
وحدها كتب جيف تعيدُ إليّ رغبة الاستمتاع بالقراءة !
هذا الكتاب عبارة عن 12 قصة قصيرة، جمعها من "زملائه" في السجن، حيث كان سجينا لمدة عامين متنقلا من سجن لآخر، تجد فيها التخطيط والدهاء والإصرار والحظ الحسن، جيفري يحب قصة "عين المحب" والكثير اشادوا بقصة "الرجل الذي سرق مكتب بريده" أظنني أميل لقصة "لا تشرب الماء" ستستمتع بها جميعاً.
وحدها كتب جيف تعيدُ إليّ رغبة الاستمتاع بالقراءة !
هذا الكتاب عبارة عن 12 قصة قصيرة، جمعها من "زملائه" في السجن، حيث كان سجينا لمدة عامين متنقلا من سجن لآخر، تجد فيها التخطيط والدهاء والإصرار والحظ الحسن، جيفري يحب قصة "عين المحب" والكثير اشادوا بقصة "الرجل الذي سرق مكتب بريده" أظنني أميل لقصة "لا تشرب الماء" ستستمتع بها جميعاً.
April 12, 2009
3.5 stars
The second work I have read by this author, and definitely not the last! Fun and irreverent. Almost always a surprising twist at the end.
My only problem is with the title. Cat O' Nine Tales: And Other Stories implies one of the stories is called "Cat O' Nine Tales" -- but there was none by that name (nor any likely candidates for having had that name but getting it changed).
The second work I have read by this author, and definitely not the last! Fun and irreverent. Almost always a surprising twist at the end.
My only problem is with the title. Cat O' Nine Tales: And Other Stories implies one of the stories is called "Cat O' Nine Tales" -- but there was none by that name (nor any likely candidates for having had that name but getting it changed).
January 5, 2017
A reasonably entertaining series of short stories, the majority of which are based on tales told to Archer during his incarceration at Her Majesty's pleasure....although I think my favourite one was "The Wisdom of Solomon"/I>, which while apparently true, is not a "prison" tale.
June 16, 2020
Not all the stories are good, the first three are good and some in the middle are good.
January 8, 2022
Few interesting ones and few dampers. But as always Jeffery Archer keeps his readers glued with his writing and story telling skills.
April 26, 2025
"... that there's a book in every one of us, is a fallacy. However, I have come to accept over the years that most people have experienced a single incident in their life that is unique to them, and well worth of a short story."
Cat O' Nine Tales by Archer is a collection of twelve short stories. Most of them were heard by Archer while in prison. My favourites include The Red King, The Wisdom of Solomon and A Greek Tragedy.
The short story genre is perhaps tricky as one has to pack in as much punch and wit without losing the string of interest for the readers. This one scores on that, though sometimes the stories go a bit off the field. But other than that, it's witty and a good recommendation if you want to get out of the reading slump.
Cat O' Nine Tales by Archer is a collection of twelve short stories. Most of them were heard by Archer while in prison. My favourites include The Red King, The Wisdom of Solomon and A Greek Tragedy.
The short story genre is perhaps tricky as one has to pack in as much punch and wit without losing the string of interest for the readers. This one scores on that, though sometimes the stories go a bit off the field. But other than that, it's witty and a good recommendation if you want to get out of the reading slump.
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