What do you think?
Rate this book
For Peter Pan on Her 70th Birthday
After their father dies, five siblings find themselves around the kitchen table of their childhood, pouring whiskey and sharing memories. The eldest, Ann, reminisces about her days playing Peter Pan at the local children’s theater, and soon the five are transported back to Neverland. For Peter Pan on her 70th birthday is a fantastical exploration of the enduring bonds of family, the resistance to “growing up,” and the inevitability of growing old.
144 pages, Paperback
Published June 5, 2018
6 people are currently reading
129 people want to read
About the author
Sarah Ruhl
42 books581 followersSarah Ruhl (born 1974) is an American playwright. She is the recipient of a MacArthur Fellowship and the PEN/Laura Pels International Foundation for Theater Award for a distinguished American playwright in mid-career.
Originally, she intended to be a poet. However, after she studied under Paula Vogel at Brown University (A.B., 1997; M.F.A., 2001), she was persuaded to switch to playwriting. Her first play was The Dog Play, written in 1995 for one of Vogel's classes. Her roots in poetry can be seen in the way she uses language in her plays. She also did graduate work at Pembroke College, Oxford.
In September 2006, she received a MacArthur Fellowship. The announcement of that award stated: "Sarah Ruhl, 32, playwright, New York City. Playwright creating vivid and adventurous theatrical works that poignantly juxtapose the mundane aspects of daily life with mythic themes of love and war."
Originally, she intended to be a poet. However, after she studied under Paula Vogel at Brown University (A.B., 1997; M.F.A., 2001), she was persuaded to switch to playwriting. Her first play was The Dog Play, written in 1995 for one of Vogel's classes. Her roots in poetry can be seen in the way she uses language in her plays. She also did graduate work at Pembroke College, Oxford.
In September 2006, she received a MacArthur Fellowship. The announcement of that award stated: "Sarah Ruhl, 32, playwright, New York City. Playwright creating vivid and adventurous theatrical works that poignantly juxtapose the mundane aspects of daily life with mythic themes of love and war."
Ratings & Reviews
Friends & Following
Create a free account to discover what your friends think of this book!
Community Reviews
Displaying 1 - 27 of 27 reviews
November 1, 2021
I had read that Sarah Ruhl, having composed her version of Eurydice to explore her grief at the loss of her father and the end of a long term relationship, would not do “personal” plays again. She also didn’t read reviews of her produced plays, I was told. Maybe--I have no idea--she wanted to insulate herself from the sometimes vicious theater establishment, where smart reviewers with sharpened knives might very well whittle your esteem and literary purpose down to dust. I don’t know whether she has changed her mind on reading reviews, but I had hoped she would create more “personal” plays, since Eurydice is (still) my favorite play she has written, in part because I found it so moving.
So: In the last two books I have now read by Ruhl, she seems to indeed have abandoned this “no personal sharing!” approach, in her collection of poems, 44 Poems for You, poems constructed not for posterity, necessarily, but conceived as gifts to individual people. There always seems to be a kind of disdain in the literary world for some kinds of “occasional” poetry, but Ruhl embraces the notion in that book. And I like it very much.
And in this play, For Peter Pan on Her 70th Birthday, Ruhl writes to honor her forever young and playful mother, at 70, who when she was growing up in Davenport, Iowa, played Peter Pan. The play has purposes other than the gift it surely is to her mother, Kathy, and to her family. As with playwrights such as Harold Pinter (who explored the beats of silence within dialogue), Ruhl explores the nature of language in talk, or what it was like for her mother’s family talking together around the table, that rhythm and overlapping joyful (or tense, when arguing) noise. The free play of language in conversation. She also explores Kathy’s family as Wendy, Peter and the Lost Boys as she creates what she calls a Midwestern Noh drama about the ghost of their father. In the third movement (not act; this is more musical than typical written drama) the family is all in their sixties or seventies, returning in their (creaky, older, but nevertheless joyful) ways to Neverland.
It’s also a play about the life of the theater, where Kathy stays “a little while longer, where you don’t have to grow up.” Yes, of course, J. M.Barrie’s Peter Pan figures in here, too: "I won't grow up!"
True, we know all about the Peter Pan syndrome, and the damage tolled for some in never truly "growing up," too, and some of Kathy's brothers and sisters do more conventional jobs, became doctors, and so on. Not to suggest Kathy was irresponsible; she was also a teacher. And by the accounts of her daughter, a good mum.
Ambitious, for such a personal enterprise? Of course, but Ruhl pulls it off, and again, movingly. I happen to be personal friends with Kathy Ruhl, so I found the play moving in part because I know her, for the honoring of her spirit and vivacity. Ruhl says in a preface that a challenge for her was to create a play not as it is typically accomplished, exploring the depths of terrible family secrets and lies, but a play about a happy, loving family.
Do you believe in Peter Pan, as Tinker Bell asks, through Wendy? If so, as you will recall, Wendy encourages the audience to clap the dead Peter Pan to life through clapping. Sarah’s mother Kathy played the elderly Peter Pan in the Chicago production of the play. Of this act of clapping, Ruhl writes, “My hope was that every time Peter Pan died in this play, and the audience resurrected her by clapping, that my mother would live forever.”
Sweet, right? Magic! The magic of being forever young, of family, of the theater, and imagination. Quietly powerful play.
So: In the last two books I have now read by Ruhl, she seems to indeed have abandoned this “no personal sharing!” approach, in her collection of poems, 44 Poems for You, poems constructed not for posterity, necessarily, but conceived as gifts to individual people. There always seems to be a kind of disdain in the literary world for some kinds of “occasional” poetry, but Ruhl embraces the notion in that book. And I like it very much.
And in this play, For Peter Pan on Her 70th Birthday, Ruhl writes to honor her forever young and playful mother, at 70, who when she was growing up in Davenport, Iowa, played Peter Pan. The play has purposes other than the gift it surely is to her mother, Kathy, and to her family. As with playwrights such as Harold Pinter (who explored the beats of silence within dialogue), Ruhl explores the nature of language in talk, or what it was like for her mother’s family talking together around the table, that rhythm and overlapping joyful (or tense, when arguing) noise. The free play of language in conversation. She also explores Kathy’s family as Wendy, Peter and the Lost Boys as she creates what she calls a Midwestern Noh drama about the ghost of their father. In the third movement (not act; this is more musical than typical written drama) the family is all in their sixties or seventies, returning in their (creaky, older, but nevertheless joyful) ways to Neverland.
It’s also a play about the life of the theater, where Kathy stays “a little while longer, where you don’t have to grow up.” Yes, of course, J. M.Barrie’s Peter Pan figures in here, too: "I won't grow up!"
True, we know all about the Peter Pan syndrome, and the damage tolled for some in never truly "growing up," too, and some of Kathy's brothers and sisters do more conventional jobs, became doctors, and so on. Not to suggest Kathy was irresponsible; she was also a teacher. And by the accounts of her daughter, a good mum.
Ambitious, for such a personal enterprise? Of course, but Ruhl pulls it off, and again, movingly. I happen to be personal friends with Kathy Ruhl, so I found the play moving in part because I know her, for the honoring of her spirit and vivacity. Ruhl says in a preface that a challenge for her was to create a play not as it is typically accomplished, exploring the depths of terrible family secrets and lies, but a play about a happy, loving family.
Do you believe in Peter Pan, as Tinker Bell asks, through Wendy? If so, as you will recall, Wendy encourages the audience to clap the dead Peter Pan to life through clapping. Sarah’s mother Kathy played the elderly Peter Pan in the Chicago production of the play. Of this act of clapping, Ruhl writes, “My hope was that every time Peter Pan died in this play, and the audience resurrected her by clapping, that my mother would live forever.”
Sweet, right? Magic! The magic of being forever young, of family, of the theater, and imagination. Quietly powerful play.
September 27, 2018
Sadly, once again I have not cottoned to yet another Ruhl play, so should perhaps just give up on her. She never seems to engage me in any fashion, and this one is woefully both underdeveloped and yet heavy-handed, with much of the dialogue stilted and leading nowhere. As a director, I'd be hard pressed to even attempt to stage this, as most of it is just 5 people sitting and talking with very little in the way of action until the very end.
February 8, 2021
While this isn’t my favorite Ruhl, this charming piece is most certainly worth a read. Asking questions about mortality and playing with the concept of adulthood, For Peter Pan is its best when one remembers that this was intended to be a very personal gift from a daughter to her actress mother.
November 30, 2025
“before i went home, i stayed in the theater for a little while longer. where you don’t have to grow up.”
August 8, 2020
This is one of the best plays about both family and the theater I have ever read. I’ve always been a wary reader of Ruhl’s work as she can be a little too twee sometimes. And yet in this story, something that would have as many landmines as writing about something so personal as one’s own family she effortlessly glides through, leading the audience on a dream tour of her mother’s life and family.
Even the playwright’s notes made me choke up. So good.
Even the playwright’s notes made me choke up. So good.
September 28, 2023
There's plenty of charm in this play that makes the personal touch Ruhl added to it more special. Ruhl's structure was unique in a way I haven't experienced when seeing or reading a play. The Noh analogy she uses in her production notes and epilogue at the end fits perfectly. Although the five siblings here may not be on the best of terms in the play, Peter Pan is able to bring them emotionally together despite their fear of getting older and dying. Maybe that was part of the reason Ruhl had these characters in their 50s to 70s. In a way emulating her own family, but also to reflect on how our life's experiences can shape us in a variety of different ways.
This was a very quick script, which I think would benefit from seeing the show live. It would be easy to read in one sitting, and I feel like the fast pace on page didn't give me the full breadth of Ruhl's characters in the same way a staged production would. That said, For Peter Pan on Her 70th Birthday provides a similar magic and wit as the other Ruhl plays I've read. Her insightful and creative approaches to theater are always enjoyable at some level.
This was a very quick script, which I think would benefit from seeing the show live. It would be easy to read in one sitting, and I feel like the fast pace on page didn't give me the full breadth of Ruhl's characters in the same way a staged production would. That said, For Peter Pan on Her 70th Birthday provides a similar magic and wit as the other Ruhl plays I've read. Her insightful and creative approaches to theater are always enjoyable at some level.
August 30, 2020
My own nostalgia with Peter Pan and family was rekindled in this play. Much love.
January 25, 2021
Simply lovely.
November 13, 2021
"You can grow up before you die or not grow up before you die, but either way you're going to die."
Admittedly, I'm probably not in the best mindset for a premise like this--but between the cover and my enduring love for the Mary Martin version of Peter Pan, I decided to spend the evening reading it.
I wish it was... more. And less? For all the lofty dialogue, it felt too hollow. Like chunks had been bitten out of the story, leaving behind something not quite fulfilling. Yet what remained was sometimes too much. It didn't feel narratively or practically real. Whenever I read plays, I try to imagine the parts as distinct characters, but I had a hard time imagining anyone performing this.
I especially felt like the secondary part, the dive from the real world into Peter Pan, didn't feel earned. Especially since a good portion of the preceding dialogue was taken up by politics and religion, not the themes of growing up, youth, fear of death, pain of losing parents, etc, integrated into the "Peter Pan" segment.
It might be the type of play that feels more substantial staged...
Admittedly, I'm probably not in the best mindset for a premise like this--but between the cover and my enduring love for the Mary Martin version of Peter Pan, I decided to spend the evening reading it.
I wish it was... more. And less? For all the lofty dialogue, it felt too hollow. Like chunks had been bitten out of the story, leaving behind something not quite fulfilling. Yet what remained was sometimes too much. It didn't feel narratively or practically real. Whenever I read plays, I try to imagine the parts as distinct characters, but I had a hard time imagining anyone performing this.
I especially felt like the secondary part, the dive from the real world into Peter Pan, didn't feel earned. Especially since a good portion of the preceding dialogue was taken up by politics and religion, not the themes of growing up, youth, fear of death, pain of losing parents, etc, integrated into the "Peter Pan" segment.
It might be the type of play that feels more substantial staged...
July 31, 2025
A beautiful play--fresh, original, dynamic, and tender--celebrating the love of a closely-knit and contentious family, and how five siblings react to the death of their father: the loss of physical presence does not equate to absence, Ruhl demonstrates, with elegance and grace and considerable humor. Written for Ruhl's mother Kathleen, who as a teenager played Peter Pan and must have bequeathed her soaring imagination and love of theater to her playwright daughter, for which we are all forever the richer.
Superb and unforgettable.
Superb and unforgettable.
April 26, 2018
I love Sarah Ruhl! She’s absolutely one of my favorite playwrights. I found that this play didn’t grab me or resonate with me in the same way her other works do. There was a lot to enjoy, and the ending was thought provoking for me. (I’ll avoid elaborating...no spoilers.) Still, I didn’t love it as much as I wanted to.
I am hopeful that seeing the play performed might move me more than reading it on the page.
I am hopeful that seeing the play performed might move me more than reading it on the page.
July 10, 2019
This is a 3.5 for me; giving it 3 stars seemed unfair.
The dialogue--the rhythm of the thing is great. However, I feel like Ruhl's done better in others of her plays. The theme was heavy-handed and the whole thing seemed mechanical in a way that wasn't spontaneous or divine-feeling. It's quaint; it's touching; it's fun--it's also thin and underdeveloped.
The dialogue--the rhythm of the thing is great. However, I feel like Ruhl's done better in others of her plays. The theme was heavy-handed and the whole thing seemed mechanical in a way that wasn't spontaneous or divine-feeling. It's quaint; it's touching; it's fun--it's also thin and underdeveloped.
February 6, 2022
A group of siblings, themselves approaching senior age gather together as their father dies and work through their views on life, death and growing up. I liked it. It's a talking heads show and the youngest character is still 15-20 years older than me but I found bits to relate to from each of the characters (and some things from each that I absolutely did not, of course) and it moved me.
November 29, 2021
Two-and-a-half stars. I had trouble connecting Act One and Two to Act Three. Grief and loss and family, then suddenly Peter Pan. Themes overlap some, but not in the same way. I'm sure not wanting to grow up/age factors in, but I didn't feel it.
November 28, 2021
Yes, this is a gift to the theater. There are so many theatrical events in this show that make it a huge play to perform--everything from flying on stage, a ghost, projections, a live dog to eat Chex Mix, and overlapping, intelligent conversations.
I would love to see this play performed.
I would love to see this play performed.
March 12, 2023
The most wholesome play 🥺🥺🥺 I loved reading and directing! The magic that radiated from the Peter Pan story and the grounded elderly character’s creates an entertaining yet emotive impact for an audience. The only thing I would say is that the Act 2 wasn’t my favourite but still a great play.
July 17, 2024
Sarah Ruhl is a great playwright.
And I would love someday to see this play.
But this play is impossible to read.
Instead of naming the characters she numbers them.
And it is near impossible to follow.
And I would love someday to see this play.
But this play is impossible to read.
Instead of naming the characters she numbers them.
And it is near impossible to follow.
September 11, 2025
A love letter to her mother, this play goes from gritty realism to absolute suspension of reality in an exploration of growing up, suffering loss, and the meaning of family. The notes in the cover compare it to a "Midwestern Noh drama", which is apt and adds to the depth!
October 26, 2025
The structure is fascinating but works against the emotion of the play, as I'm not quite sure I ever reached the catharsis and clear personal touch in every word of the piece. That being said, Ruhl is taking such bold, interesting turns that intrigued me and kept me just engaged enough to enjoy it.
February 26, 2018
Great dialogue.
December 5, 2018
I don’t know what I was expecting.... I’d be really interested to see this stage. I did, however, find the ending extremely moving.
November 16, 2019
Cute, Peter Pan, no complaints. :)
July 27, 2022
Heart warming but takes some time to step back & understand; lovely stage presence
July 11, 2024
if i saw this live, i would bawlllllll
July 15, 2025
What an absolutely gorgeous piece of writing.
September 15, 2025
SO SAD WHAT THE FREAK, sarah ruhl stop making my cry
March 16, 2022
OOOOOOOFFFFFF This one HURT!!! It was simply beautiful. I cried a lot. Well worth the read. Very nostalgic and well-written.
Displaying 1 - 27 of 27 reviews