An American Family: A Memoir of Hope and Sacrifice

by Khizr Khan

This inspiring memoir by the Gold Star parent and captivating DNC speaker is the story of one family's pursuit of the American dream and why--especially in these tumultuous times--we must not be afraid to step forward for what we believe in when it matters most.

An American Family is an intensely personal story about the nature of true patriotism and what it's like to risk everything you know for the promise of a 226-year-old piece of parchment. As Khizr Khan traces his remarkable journey--from humble beginnings on a poultry farm in Pakistan to obtaining a degree from Harvard Law School and raising a family in America--he shows what it means to leave the limitations of one's country behind for the best values and promises of another. He also tells the story of the Khans' middle child, U.S. Army Captain Humayun Khan, who was killed while protecting his base camp in Iraq, and the ways in which their undying pride in him and his sacrifice have helped them endure the deepest despair a parent can know.

The book is a stark depiction of what an American looks like, what being a nation of immigrants really means, and what it is to live--rather than simply to pay lip service to--our ideals.

Genres: Nonfiction, Memoir, Biography, Politics, Biography Memoir, Audiobook, Autobiography

288 pages, Hardcover

First published October 24, 2017

About the author

Khizr Muazzam Khan is the father of United States Army Captain Humayun Khan, who was killed in 2004 during the Iraq War and was posthumously awarded the Bronze Star and Purple Heart. Khizr and his wife Ghazala received international attention following a speech at the 2016 Democratic National Convention that criticized Republican presidential candidate Donald Trump.

Reviews

[Elyse Walters · Rating 5 out of 5]

Library overdrive ebook

Senator John McCain praised “An American Family”, with these words:
“I’d like to say to Mr. and Mrs. Khan: Thank you for immigrating to America. We’re a better country because of you. And you are certainly right; your son was the best of America, and the memory of his sacrifice will make us a better nation —and he will never be forgotten”.

This memoir isn’t a long book ... but one of the strongest messages the reader comes away with is Khizr Khan’s advocacy- love - and knowledge for the Declaration of Independence, the Constitution and the amendments to it”.

This is a lovely story about Khan’s immigrant experience from Pakistan - values from his grandfather that stayed with him since being a boy - ( education- integrity- family), growing up in Pakistan to meeting his wife - Ghazala- and supporting their three sons in the United States.
Khan came from a poor family - yet he was able to be educated at some of the finest universities in the world - and became a successful attorney.

In 2004, their middle son, Humayun, was killed by a suicide bomber outside Baghdad. A devastating loss - their child!

In 2016 his family was invited to speak at the Democratic National Convention. Hillary Clinton planned a tribute to Humayun that night.
Khan addressed Donald Trump asking Trump if he had read the United States Constitution.
It was a bold confrontation.

It’s impossible to finish this book and not feel the magnitude of the Khan’s contributions...
and look inward at ourselves.

Through Khan’s eyes - coming from poverty - “Life- Liberty - and the pursuit of Happiness”, is not a panacea.

The Immigrant story inside this book is inspirational ....
This is an undeniable American Family!!
Khah’s total belief & dedication to America
is pure. His hunger for knowledge is insatiable. And what this does to ‘us’?....
well, it shakes us up.
Maybe....
there is possibly for our country to unite.

[Heather · Rating 5 out of 5]

I have never cried reading a book. Never. Until now.

Khizr Khan is an exceptional writer and his life story is simply incredible. It’s uplifting, powerful, humble, gracious and deserving of attention.

Khizr Khan is a wise man, a patriotic man, a man of faith. He has struggled and worked hard and changed the world in a significant way. His story deserves to be read, acknowledged, appreciated.

I want to thank him and his wife Ghazala. I want to shake their hands, give them big, huge squeezy hugs, and cry with them.

This story is so uplifting, it will make you feel like you can accomplish anything. You can be the better person even if that’s the harder choice to make. This family has chosen honor above all else, and I deeply respect them.

I absolutely 100% recommend this book. It is simply astounding in every way. I am so glad I read this.

[Emily Briano · Rating 5 out of 5]

Nope. Six Stars.
⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
If you are a thoughtful, breathing American, please read this book. For an even more emotional and unforgettable experience, LISTEN to Mr. Khan retell his story of coming to America from Pakistan and gather a beach-towel sized handkerchief to absorb your tears as tells the story of his son's ultimate sacrifice for America. And then when you are finished, buy a pocket US Constitution and get to work making sure that America is a safe and loving and equal home to anyone who wants to come here for a better life.

I am still processing the emotions from this book, so a longer review may follow. But this book is one that is so desperately needed right now. Rarely do I read a book where I want to get on all the social things and tell my friends to read this book. So what are you waiting for?

[Linda Quinn · Rating 5 out of 5]

“I am an American patriot not because I was born here but because I was not. I embraced American freedoms, raised my children to cherish and revere them, lost a son who swore an oath to defend them, because I come from a place where they do not exist.” If I could give this book and Mr. Khan more than 5 stars I would do so in a heartbeat.

[Julie Christiano · Rating 5 out of 5]

I will never forget this this author, his family, their son Captain Humayun Khan, and their story. This story of Khizir's life and love for this country and its ideals will take your breath away. Astounding in every way. I ask that you read this incredible work.

[Krystal · Rating 5 out of 5]

Khizr Khan is a gifted memoirist and his family's American life is a revelation! Unfortunately, it also illuminates how model minority myths will never keep us safe from white supremacist harm.

[Rebecca McPhedran · Rating 5 out of 5]

I am an American patriot not because I was born here but because I was not. I embraced American freedoms, raised my children to cherish and revere them, lost a son who swore an oath to defend them, because I come from a place where they do not exist."

Khizr Khan may be a familiar face from the 2016 Democratic National Convention. He spoke eloquently about his love for the US Constitution, and his love for his son. His son, Humayun Khan was an officer in the US Army and was killed in action in 2004.

Khan was a Pakistani born lawyer. He has been a citizen of the United States for over thirty years. His love of the founding principles of our country truly shine through in this beautiful book. He is so wonderfully eloquent in his immigration story. His story is so similar to so many other immigration stories, and I feel like it humanizes these people that just want to come and make a better lives for themselves. This book is truly phenomenal, and I feel like it is a very timely read.

[Susanne · Rating 5 out of 5]

Oh my. I am moved beyond words by this memoir of a modest man of humble origins who moved to the United States from Pakistan to further his education, became a citizen, and now reminds us all of the gift it is to live in America. He writes: "I am an American patriot not because I was born here but because I was not. I embraced American freedoms, raised my children to cherish and revere them, because I came from a place where they do not exist." He is, of course, the father of one of 14 Muslim-American soldiers to die in defense of our country since 9/11, and he spoke at the Democratic National Convention in 2016. Perhaps it takes someone from "away" to point out the virtues that we American-born citizens can take so easily for granted.

[Melkor von Moltke · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is an exceptional short work by Harvard graduate, immigrant, gold star father Mr. Khizr Khan. Mr. Khan has written a moving and poignant book on his family's trials and tribulations from his humble origins in Pakistan, to his success in the United States. Intermixed with the narrative is an appeal to the ideals of the founders of the United States.

This is largely an apolitical work, in spite of Mr. Khan's speech at the Democratic National Convention. While Pakistani politics are often criticized, the only American politician lambasted is President Trump, and even then only briefly, near the end of the final chapter. Mr. Khan speaks often of his admiration for President Reagan and Senator McCain throughout the work. Secretary Clinton mostly receives passing mention near the end of the book when her campaign contacted Mr. Khan.

The meat of the book is the saga of Mr. Khan: from his humble origins in Pakistan, his struggle to get by at the university and court an his faithful wife. Their journey to Dubai, then Texas. Even after making it to the United States Mr. Khan tells of the great lengths he went to so that he could provide for his family.

The most moving part of the book is when he describes raising his sons, and the death of one of those sons, Captain Humayun Khan, in Iraq. He goes from initial denial and grief, to the measures that the family took to preserve Humayun's legacy.

The final pages of the book describe how he and his family dealt came to the Democratic National Convention, rewriting and rehearsing the speech, and trying to create a concise and moving appeal to the American people.

All in all, Mr. Khan has crafted an excellent work to remind Americans that our hallowed ideals are worth standing up for, fighting for, and, if necessary, dieing for.

[Rebecca Wilson · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book is where cynicism goes to die. Mr. and Mrs. Khan are remarkable people and remarkable Americans, and Mr. Khan's understated, plain-spoken memoir is a welcome corrective to most of what passes for patriotism in this political climate.

[LemonLinda · Rating 4 out of 5]

What an inspiring read! Would that all Americans had such sincere love of country and admiration for American ideals and principles as this Gold Star family, the Khans. Mr. Khan’s love for the words of our founding fathers and his respect and ultimate awareness of equal protection under the law, the rule of law and political, religious and economic freedoms even in the face of increasing prejudice against Muslims is admirable. Their entire family including that of Captain Humayun Khan, their son earned a Bronze Star and Purple Heart, marks the epitome of those who unfailingly work to achieve the American dream. I had the privilege of hearing Mr. Khan’s inspiring words at a book event last fall and was so in awe of his courage, so I was confident that the words found within these pages would further inspire by telling the story of his dreams, his struggles, his successes, but most of all of his unwillingness to lose his vision of America as a “shining city on a hill”. I end this book with even more admiration for him. He showcases for us the best that America has to offer.

[Jim · Rating 1 out of 5]

I won this book on Goodreads. This book was tough to get through and after 150 pages I just skimmed the rest. I found I was disinterested in it all. This isn't a political book but the politics that the author talks about are all wrong. I liked the part about liking Reagan but he misconstrues Trump's words. The author says that it is unconstitutional to ban Muslims, first of all not all Muslims were being banned, secondly it was only a temporary ban of just 3 months and yes it is constitutional. Presidents do have that authority, he wasn't banning them based on religion but by Sharia law which is the basis of a government not religion. Obama did the same thing banning Iraqi's for 6 months. The media will tell you otherwise and say that the two bans can't compare, but stop the spin! Also the author refers to inalienable rights coming from man and basically we have none because of that, no, inalienable means that they come from God and they cannot be taken away by any man --that man/government cannot take or transfer your rights away like a government can. This is the intent of the founding fathers. I know this is a proof which is unedited but the chapter at the end is totally blank as well and there are some capitalization problems in the beginning of the book. Why put out a book that is incomplete. Very disappointed.

[Rosemary Clark · Rating 5 out of 5]

Mr. Khan has a literary gift of expression that conveys the emotional immediacy of his experiences. As ordinary as the incidents of his past appear to be – related through a Pakistani youth, education, marriage, and immigration to the United States – they contain the seeds of an acute awareness and striving to serve others. In passing these sentiments on to his own family, he demonstrates a richness of character, even though it asks of them the ultimate sacrifice, the death of his middle son Humayun as he served in the U.S. military during the Iraq war. Khan’s book touches on the crippling grief that descends on a family with such a loss, but it is also a guidepost for engaging the awareness and striving that matures from these events to higher ends. This is wisdom teaching at its most inspirational.

[John Yingling · Rating 5 out of 5]

I'm proud to call Khizr Kahn a fellow American. He, and his family, embody all that this country is, or should be. His son Humayun was a true hero, and I can't even imagine the feelings Mr. Khan and his family experienced when Humayun was killed in action. Mr. Khan's life is an example of surmounting the odds, becoming successful in life, and passing on all the best values of a human being to his children and to the people he met. This book is extraordinarily moving and inspirational. I listened to the book on CD, read by Mr. Khan, and that in itself was a most memorable experience. I hope to read over 100 books this year, and this title will be a strong candidate to be the at the very least in the top 5. I'm leaning toward thinking that every American should not only carry with them a copy of our Constitution, as Mr. Khan does, but be required to read, or listen to, this book.

[David · Rating 5 out of 5]

4.5

This book was filled with dignity, humanity, sacrifice, hope, heartache, the true meaning of the American Dream and most importantly love. Mr. Khan is the embodiment of what our country is supposed to be during a time when so many people are searching for answers about what it often looks like we have become. Listening to him as he described his love of family and of the United States was a true pleasure even though the story occasionally slowed down a little. It is a book that will definitely stay with me and it was an honor to be given a window into the lives of such a wonderful family.

[Heidi · Rating 4 out of 5]

"So what if you are thirsty? Always be a river for everyone." A very inspiring story.

[Mystica · Rating 5 out of 5]

Immigrant stories have always appealed to me. My three children are themselves immigrants and every success story which is full of happiness and success brings a lot of happiness to me personally as well as I know it echoes my own wishes for my own children.

This story which propelled one family into prominence through the sad death of their son is no exception. Like most immigrants the Khans were hard working, god fearing, simple folk. The fact that they were Muslim was incidental to the entire issue. That their son was a Muslim who worked in the American forces and was killed in the line of duty is also a fact. That the situation was politicized for someone's gain is shameful.

The title of the book says it all. The Khans brought up their sons the American way, with strong beliefs in the power of justice and equality for all. The parents were strong supportive parents in no way radicalized or partial towards a single group of people. The story of their lives was of huge interest and the way the story unfolds is beautiful.

Mr. Khan Snr spoke up for what he felt was right and he was pilloried and his family was reviled for that. He must be admired that he still believes in what he said and stands up for what is right. From very humble beginnings in Pakistan to Harvard is no easy feat. He and his wife also brought up their children with very ethical and moral understandings and the memoir is a testimony to that.

I loved this book and the story of the Khans.

[Yvonne · Rating 5 out of 5]

Wow. I cried twice while reading this book. It’s touching and poignant and left me thinking that Khizr Khan is, without a doubt, a better American than I am. But the strength of this memoir is that rather than leaving me feeling condemned, I finished this book feeling both humbled that I get to share my country with upstanding citizens like the Khans and inspired to become a better American myself. This memoir offers such a valuable perspective as the United States continues to debate what kind of country it wants to be. If 2017 has you feeling pessimistic, let 'An American Family' remind you what REAL American patriotism looks like in this day and age.

[Katherine · Rating 4 out of 5]

Read an advance review copy. This is a quick but worthwhile read, and a timely rebuke to the country who elected Trump.

[Reem Mohsen · Rating 5 out of 5]

An American Family is so much more than an autobiography of Khizr Khan. The reader will learn about the history, culture and mores of Pakistan, the importance of family: past, present and future, of love and overwhelming loss, of hunger, homelessness, poverty and of the unslakable thirst for knowledge. It is primarily a story of an immigrant coming to the United States because he knew both intellectually and spiritually, that it offered the best chance for a life of dignity, justice, equality and personal fulfillment. As a first year student of law in Lahore, Mr. Khan was jolted to his very core by the words of the Declaration of Independence. He was electrified by the safeguards codified for all citizens in the US Constitution and that this document was amendable as the times warranted. But this book is also a clarion call to remind us that we have the responsibility to safeguard the legacy of America's founding fathers. We must rally against any effort to deny fundamental rights and freedoms to all and to encourage and protect those seeking an opportunity to come to the USA for a better life. To quote Mr. Kahn, "I am an American patriot not because I was born here, but because I was not ...When you live somewhere where fundamental dignity and equality do not exist, it is all you yearn for."

[Sharon Orlopp · Rating 5 out of 5]

Incredible true story of a Pakistan immigrant who came to America and continually learned and applied himself to make a better life for his family. His son was a captain in the US Army and was unfortunately killed by a suicide bomber while serving in Baghdad in 2004. Hillary Clinton asked the author, Khizr Khan, to speak at the Democratic National Convention in 2016---more than 11 years after his son had been killed. Khan spoke as a "patriotic American Muslim with undivided loyalty to the U.S."

Khan shares his passion and belief for what America stands for and the ideals that were created in our Constitution.

[Jessica Woofter · Rating 5 out of 5]

Wow. This book is so beautiful and well-written that I kept flipping to the front cover to see if I was missing a "written with". But no, Khizr Khan is a scrappy immigrant, Harvard-educated lawyer, powerful public speaker, and eloquent writer who speaks several languages and lives a life of principle and generosity. Leave some for the rest of us, Khizr!
I took two things away from this book:
1) I want to be a better American. The way that Mr. Khan writes about American ideals makes you want to live up to them.
2) I want to be a better parent. The deliberateness with which this man and his wife raised their kids makes me want to think less about getting through the day and more about shaping the character of my children.
Okay, 3 things. The third is that this book reinforces my idea of a one-in, one-0ut immigration policy. I would gladly trade Kid Rock, all of the Trumps, and Stephen Miller for the hard-working members of Khizr Khan's family who came here through "chain migration".

[Sarah W. · Rating 4 out of 5]

Khizr Khan became famous for his speech at the 2016 Democratic Convention, when he conveyed a message about democracy and sacrifice that cause a media firestorm. This memoir fills in more about Khan's life and his family, and it can be incredibly heartening to read about how American values resonate with those from distant cultures. Khan recounts how he came to the United States, how he met and first interacted with Americans, came to understand American values, and how he and his wife strove to instill those values in their children. And finally, Khan shares how he learned of the death of his son while serving in the US military and how he came to give his notable speech at a political convention. It made for a more compelling read than I had anticipated and my heart goes out to the Khan family.

[Candy · Rating 4 out of 5]

Thank you to NetGalley and the publisher for an advance copy of this book.

This was a wonderful memoir of Khizr Khan’s journey to becoming a US citizen, and his and his family’s lives as US citizens. I would have liked to have seen this book remain apolitical, and instead use it to teach some history, impart wisdom, inspire others, and remind them of the things that we take for granted. Mr. Khan certainly made me take an introspective look at myself.

That being said, the book becomes very political toward the end. Mr. Khan doesn’t hide his antipathy toward Donald Trump. (No, I am not a Trump supporter. But I do feel that we, as a country, need to come together and stop all this crazy in-fighting.) I was a bit confused about his political stance. Did he feel Hillary Clinton was a good candidate? Did he embrace her ideals, morals, values, judgment? Or was he just using the Democratic Convention for his purpose. Did he ever feel the Democratic Party was using him in return?

The book ended so abruptly, I momentarily thought part of it was missing. I was left with so many questions about what happened in the aftermath of his speech. I wanted to know his motivation behind giving the speech.

This was a great book, and even with the strange ending, it is still a very worthwhile read.

[Steve · Rating 5 out of 5]

Absolutely a Must Read! Congrats to Mr. Khan for giving us a refreshing insight into what America means to those fortunate enough to be able to become a part of our rich heritage. He paints a beautiful picture of another piece that is the collage of American history. Short, sweet, and points well made.

[Lorrie · Rating 5 out of 5]

I am so grateful that I took the time to read this heart felt, intelligent recount of the author’s life. His story has instilled in me a great love for our country that, to be honest, at times has nearly been lost due to the current “grotesque vaudevillian” politician at the helm. Thank you, Mr. Khan, Esquire, for your honesty, bravery & transparency.

[Diane Montondo · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is a thoughtful look into the life of a Muslim American who gained a deeper understanding of what it means to be free by growing up in his native country Pakistan.

I listened to this audiobook on CD. It was read by the author, which is unusual but has happened before. It gives an authenticity to the content and relays his humility and gratitude.

[Ariana · Rating 5 out of 5]

Can I give it 10 stars? This was the most touching book I have read in awhile. Eloquent, heartfelt, honest, beautiful. I listened to the audio version which is read by the author. Do not let his somewhat slow reading speed put you off (I assume it was recorded that way for people who struggle to understand English spoken with an accent)...there was something extra special about hearing his family's story in his own words and in his own voice. Every American should read this in order to gain an immigrant's perspective of the USA and what true patriotism is. And it's a good backstory to whatever coverage of his DNC speech you heard and reactions that followed. These are incredible people with an incredible story.

[Katy · Rating 5 out of 5]

You can view my reviews, book life, and much more at http://thebookishcronk.com.

I love, Love, LOVE this book. I got this library hold right at the perfect time. It's primarily the story of Khizr Khan's life, but it's so much more than that. It talks about family and working hard to provide for them. It goes over their immigration journey, how proud they were to become Americans, and how they turned their son's death into a positive thing they could do for other service men and women that were about to graduate. I admire their ability to stay positive when things are tough. If you admired them after Khan held up the Constitution, knowing the journey to that moment makes it very inspiring.

[Mount Prospect Public Library]

"This book could be about almost any American family. A very interesting look at immigration." - Summer Reading 2018 participant