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Only His Touch

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"I panic every time I think about getting hurt..."

Kurt was a beautiful man, but now he can barely look at himself in the mirror. One night, years ago, he had let his guard down, and a sadistic group had taken advantage of the situation. The assault wasn't sexual, but Kurt is reminded of it every time he sees the scars. He knows that, no matter what, he can never let anyone else see the tapestry of abuse on his back.

"I would never hurt you, Kurt."

James already has a busy life. Between his son moving back home during college, trying to help a jilted ex-boyfriend get back on his feet, and his thriving-but-stressful ownership of a wine bar, he knew he didn't have time for any new drama. But when he saw the beautiful golden-haired and golden-skinned Kurt, he knew he had to make time, no matter what baggage Kurt had.

"How about I don't touch you? You can touch me, Kurt. I won't touch you. I won't move an inch unless you tell me to."

Despite a series of missteps by James, Kurt feels his resistance start to break down. Still, even though he feels like he can touch James, he can't seem to make that final leap of trust. However, as James opens up his life to Kurt, Kurt realizes that James is just as emotionally vulnerable as he is. James tries to hide the scars of his history as fiercely as Kurt hides the scars on his back. Will Kurt allow James to make him whole again, or will he never allow himself to be touched again?

436 pages, Kindle Edition

First published March 1, 2017

70 people are currently reading
101 people want to read

About the author

Elsa Winters

7 books14 followers
Author also writes as Lola Carson

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Displaying 1 - 30 of 40 reviews
Profile Image for AussieMum.
1,393 reviews56 followers
April 6, 2019
DNF 49%

I only found this because I five starred a book this author writes under another name. But this was a mess. The basic plot was interesting enough but the story was so overworked. Too many characters with backstories and most of them were horrible people or had ulterior motives, too much miscommunication, too much too and fro, too much manufactured drama. The characters also changed personalities from chapter to chapter and the “mystery” of Kurt’s injuries actually became annoying rather than a source of empathy.

I spent a few hours with these characters and I didn’t really even like them. I ended up skimming to the end. Definitely not like my experience under the authors other name. YMMV
Profile Image for blub.
2,040 reviews
March 10, 2017
Kurt (can't find his last name, I don't it's in the book) runs a catering company with his best friend Ricky. Two years prior he suffered a horrendous attack at the hands of others. It’s put him off the hopes of ever being in a relationship or finding someone who can accept him with his issues.

James Jones owns a wine bar and enlists. He’s holding an event and when the caterers are late he’s pissed, wanting deduct a 10% fee from their pay. But when he catches sight of Kurt that all goes out the window. The magnetism he feels towards Kurt results in him tipping them 15% and giving Kurt a six month free membership to his exclusive wine bar.

James is drawn to Kurt and is determined to win himself a date with the man and using whatever is at his disposal to reach out to him. But when he does get Kurt to agree to a meet up, it doesn’t go so well. Ex-lovers are coming out of the wood works and getting between him and any relationship he hopes to have with Kurt. But James isn’t one to give up on the things he wants most and he’s hell bent on showing Kurt that he wants more than a lay.

I really enjoyed the story even though it was over sixty-eight/seventy chapters long (depending on format) and about 400 pages. Some chapters were longer than others but all filled with awesome goodness. There was not a dull moment in the book and it really pulls you in from the get go so don’t let the length scare you away.

The chemistry and passion between Kurt and James were combustible. The sex scenes were extremely steamy and a majority of the time there was not intercourse. I’m surprise my ereader, bed, chair, and floor didn’t catch on fire. Because the sex scenes were pretty damn hot. I really enjoyed getting to know James and Kurt. I do wish there was a tad more background on both there was just enough to stay the curious questions I had about the life they led.

James is an interesting character and quite the enigma. From the book we first draw that he's dangerous almost deadly but caring and considerate to those he love or in Kurt's case, a potential love interest. He's not exactly threatening to Ricky, Kurt's best friend and work partner. But he shows it in glimpses out of sight of Kurt.

There were parts of the story that I didn’t like where James was being too crass and using terms like slut and whore that left what could have been distaste and disappointment in my mouth. An example of this would be when he threatens Alex the first time after he tries to run Kurt off. James reference to sex, Alex and Kurt and his relationship with Kurt threw me off kilter. I felt a little degraded for Kurt.

Kurt finally sleeping with James like full on intercourse and them arguing about going another round was sweet and funny. I feel like James was really in for it and didn’t know what he was getting himself into when he prepared for the night. I like how the tables turned on him.
As a reader I was hoping Kurt would get to face down his attackers and see just how dangerous James could be. This definitely is going on my favorites for this year.

A free copy was provided to me in exchange for an honest review.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
Profile Image for Tristan.
918 reviews20 followers
July 5, 2017
3~3.5/5

It wasn't bad, tho it does drag. While the author managed to keep the plot suspended over the length of the book, there were still crease here and there that needed to be smooth out.
Profile Image for Shaztwirl.
3,310 reviews36 followers
March 22, 2017
Great.

This is a great story. There's so much depth to the characters, in fact I'd love to read a prequel of both their lives. In particular there are facets of James' character I'd love to explore more (obviously his past "work" but the hand-on-thigh incident showed a side to him that's equally disturbing and intriguing).
Profile Image for **Elle**Bee**Double U**.
2,207 reviews24 followers
March 11, 2017
**I voluntarily reviewed an Advance Reader Copy of this book**

I didn't hate this book, but I didn't really like it either.
For one thing, I think the author had just too many side stories going on in this book. There was James and Kurt's budding relationship, Ricky and Kurt's friendship/wanna be lovers relationship, Sadie and her many conquests, Neil and Sadie, James and Alex, Alex and the waiter....Do you see what I mean??

The build up to finding out what really happens to Kurt was really disappointing. He had been living for 2 years with no memory of what happened and dreams of pain. But then at the end BAM! He has a dream and all the pieces fit together and he's now a happy man who won't let his past define him. Really? Just like that?

We get all these jumbled bits and pieces of Kurt's past, but we get to know absolutely nothing about James. There's mentions of him leaving a life of crime/drugs, and he has a temper that has people fearing him, but nothing else. I mean hell we don't even know how old James is. It's constantly mentioned that he's an older guy, and Kurt is a younger man closer to James' son's age.

This book had some great potential, but there were just too many details left out, relationships added in that had no place in this book. It was bogged down with unnecessary relationships and drama that really served no purpose to the story.
Profile Image for Danna Iuliana.
1,104 reviews2 followers
March 10, 2017
This had so much potential but it turned out a mess. I didn t like 1 character in this story, they all seem psychotic at times. The secondary characters were not supportive or likeble. Alex staying with James was ridiculous, made no sense. Before Kurt, James was a fuck em and leave em and bc he now feels guilty ab it he lets Alex stay with him although the guy keeps filling Kurt's head with crap. Why didn t James bring all his ex's since he felt so guilty. Kurt's running at every word got old fast and his need for Ricky was annoying. The book should be called only Ricky and James's touch. The reader is suppose to feel some heartbreak for what happened to Kurt but I actually felt like he was manipulating everyone around him and using his situation to explain all of his tantrums. The whole plot is a build up to what happened to Kurt and when you do find out I actually laughed at the absurd way it was all rezolved. Kurt dreams ab what happened to him (we don t actually get details) and wakes up a new man, just like that all is forgotten and he has no more hangs up
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
2,914 reviews15 followers
October 20, 2017
Great blurb - wish I'd stopped there
Profile Image for Mitch Reynolds.
Author 37 books40 followers
June 28, 2019
Only His Touch (2017) by Elsa Winters is a great book. I loved it from page 1.

Kurt runs a catering company with his best friend Ricky. His world collides with James when he and Ricky are asked to do a job for James’ bar. Kurt is holding back a huge secret. He was viciously attacked by a group of men and has sustained horrific injuries to his back. The incident has led him to fear intimacy. Meanwhile James has a certain amount of secrets of his own. In short, he is a cad who charms men, shags them and runs for the hills. Add into all this, Ricky is secretly in love with Kurt and James’ ex lovers keep turning up.

Both Kurt and James are fathers. I liked reading about Kurt’s young children coming to visit him and I really liked Cole who is James’ teenage son. He seems a very straight to the point young man.

Kurt and James definitely have chemistry. That is very obvious from even the first scene they are in together. They have great humour together too and in general the book is littered with humour which was a huge reason I thoroughly enjoyed reading it. There is a lot of hot sex in the book between them too.

The book has very natural writing. So wonderfully down-to-earth and I loved that. I read it with ease and quite quickly even though it is quite a long book. It was pleasure really to read. A total page-turner and completely my kind of book and writing style.
Important issues like depression, the impact assault and attacks have on people and how difficult it is to trust again are covered very well in this book and in a very human way.

I like Kurt. He is my favourite character in the book. He has great humour, is very level-headed and kind. I have to admit that a lot of the characters aren’t that nice. James has aggression issues which is shown through his violent encounters with his exs Sam and Alex after they tell Kurt things that he doesn’t want him to hear. Sure they shouldn’t have been interfering but he went too far. Ricky is another character that wasn’t nice. He kissed Kurt when he was drunk and almost asleep which sounds weird as hell. Michael who is dating James’ friend and work colleague Sadie is a nightmare who accidentally nearly kills her in a drunken rage. I actually quite liked Alex up until near the end and I didn’t mind Sam too much up to the same point. But then Sam convinces Alex to get into bed with a sleeping James to take photographs which was a terrible invasion of space. I didn’t think it fitted very well up to that point with their characters and it felt like a way of making James look better in terms of his earlier outbursts. But yes, between the sexual harassment and the violence of numerous characters, the list does get shorter on who you like as the book progresses. James is certainly caring to Kurt and very sensitive to his feelings about the torment he has faced in his past but I wasn’t really rooting for them to end up together even though I knew they would. I couldn’t help thinking that if Kurt said the wrong things in James’ eyes later in their relationship, he would be violent with him.

The novel is written very well. I didn’t dislike anything apart from many of the characters but because one of the two main characters is a sweetheart it still works for me. I did love it. I found myself very intrigued and wanting to find out what happened next at almost every turn. This author is brimming with talent and I look forward to reading more of her work in the future.

I loved it.
Profile Image for Rebecca Grove.
3,492 reviews26 followers
March 11, 2017
Kurt is a Chef and runs a catering business with his best friend. A few years ago he was in a horrible situation and has the scars to prove it. He now cannot handle other people's touch except for a couple of close friends. Then one night his business provided refreshments for an event at a wine club. There he meets the owner James and sparks fly. James is a busy club owner but when he sees Kurt when wants to get to know him better. James is ready to be patient and be understanding to get his man. Kurt is afraid but drawn to James. Their relationship has lots of bumps and Kurt runs away a few times. The big question is can Kurt overcome the scars from his past and allow James to touch him?
This is a good book with characters with plenty of depth. I felt really bad for Kurt and James was awesome about being patient although he did make some mistakes in their relationship. I voluntarily received a copy of this story and this is my honest review.
Profile Image for Tammy.
646 reviews9 followers
March 10, 2017
Got from Hidden Gems Romance ARC Club, for a honest review.

When first started reading about James Character, I thought what a temper he has. It made me think all kinds of things about him. He had temper against other people but when came to Kurt it was gentle and soft. Thought maybe he was hiding something. But kept reading because the book snagged me and wouldn't let go until the whole story unfolded. I was so pulled into Kurt's character on wanting to know the story about his back. I cried couple of times for him. The story was well written and pulled me in with a steady pace. The characters helped to make sure I was held captive to read their story as well. I Loved it. Elsa Winters is another author I will be adding to my reading list.

Thank you for letting me read your awesome story.
2,602 reviews10 followers
August 13, 2017
I enjoyed this book. There's a HEA with no cliffhanger so you can read through the story and enjoy from begging to end. Kurt was hurt a few years ago and since then he really struggles to let anyone in on his life. He doesn't trust easily and doesn't like to be touched. He has one person who he counts on and that is Ricky. They went into business together to be caterers. Kurt meets James who is a man that has hired them to cater his private party at his wine bar. When things start to heat up between James and Kurt, James helps him overcome the issues that Kurt has of people touching him. This is the only way that they can be together. Without intimacy you can't have a relationship. There is plenty of drama, intense chiemistry and past mistakes that make you question why they are still around. I voluntarily read an Advanced Reader's Copy of this book.
Profile Image for Christina's Bookshelf.
248 reviews9 followers
May 21, 2017
Only His Touch is a second chance book that was absolutely fantastic. Only, it's not a second chance at a love the two MCs lost a while ago, it's a second chance at life, intimacy, allowing love.

Kurt was left for dead after being drugged and brutally attacked. His best friend Ricky saved his life. Now they own a catering company together and although Kurt's alive he's not living.

James owns the wine bar where the sexiest man is setting up food for an event. He must know more about this man.

This story is fun, sad, curious, and heartbreaking.

You can see the full review on my website: http://christinasbookshelf.net/2017/0...
Profile Image for Stephan.
142 reviews10 followers
May 20, 2017
There was a lot good here, all about regaining intimacy. But I spent a long time in the book wishing for more backstory on all the characters. It's fine not to tell the reader right away about the big events they're both working through, but why not tell us a bit more about the rest of the history, the relationships with all the secondary characters. How old are the kids? Why food professions? Do they have parents/siblings alive? How long have their friends been close, how'd they meet? Like, I still have so many questions...
Profile Image for Kimberly .
927 reviews4 followers
August 10, 2017
Jealousy sinks in the deepest of hearts...

Kurt and Ricky own a catering company that ends up doing business with a high end club. James Jones, the owner of the bar stakes his claims on Kurt. Ricky whom has deep seated feelings for Kurt, tries to thwart Kurt away. Life doesn't go as planned but it all works out for the happy couple. I voluntarily reviewed an advanced readers copy of this book.
1 review
July 20, 2021
Romantic and touching

I read a lot of m/m books but Only his touch really got to my heart.I absolutely loved it.The lead characters Kurt and James where so likeable.Even the supporting characters where interesting .The love story didn't feel forced and was completely believable.I would love Elsa to write a sequel to this and dying to know what happens next to them all.I strongly recommend this book to lovers of the genre.
Profile Image for Emeziel.
348 reviews19 followers
December 16, 2017
Really good book. I like this author. The only thing was that a looot was going on. Sadie and Richard were like extra characters. It lagged a bit at some places.
Profile Image for Kerry.
820 reviews
March 11, 2017
For this being Elsa Winters second book I'm quite impressed by it and it seems she is a budding author. This novel follows two damaged men for very different reasons and with very different coping strategies. Kurt is not only physically but emotionally scarred from an attack two years prior and struggles to overcome his fear of touch. James is a man trying to make amends I guess you could say for a past life with its own emotional impact. He's a man who is busy running his business, taking care of his son and dealing with a past-lover who isn't quite on the same page!

Elsa Winters develops this storyline well and James' dominance and patience plays really well against the skittish and vulnerable Kurt. I love how their relationship develops and how the physical scenes between them occur. Her characterisation is good and you fall for both Kurt and James as well as a number of other characters I hope she writes more about.

I agree with other reviewers that once Kurt explains everything it feels a bit rushed and a massive factor regarding James' past is missed in being revealed to Kurt but to be honest I think revealing this may have led the characters down a path she simply didn't want to go. I truly hope she write more about Kurt and James and includes more in their past and their futures. This book finishes on a HEA but there is certainly potential for more to be explored if she can reconnect with these two beautifully created men.

I really enjoyed reading this and can't wait to see what she brings out next!

I voluntarily reviewed an Advanced Reader Copy of this book
Profile Image for P Leslie.
3,202 reviews17 followers
March 5, 2017
*I voluntarily read a review copy of this book. All opinions stated are solely my own and no one else's*

Only His Touch was an amazing read from start to finish and I enjoyed it immensely. This is the first book I've read by this author and I wasn't left disappointed.

Kurt is haunted by his past; his physical scars are a constant reminder of the night that changed his life. He's damaged and broken emotionally and physically - who would want him?

Can James help heal a broken man?

My heart broke for Kurt; he's been through so much but his past keeps holding him back. He's frightened of being intimate with another man and finds it easier to run away than have a confrontation.

James was confident, easy going, yet patient. He never pushes Kurt but allows him to remain in control. His dominant nature in the bedroom was sexy but I liked the fact that he controlled himself a lot around Kurt - never wanting to push him to quick too soon.

James and Kurt had amazing chemistry: it was intense, passionate yet all consuming. I enjoyed watching their relationship slowing blossom into something beautiful - connecting both of them emotionally and physically.

I felt like throttling Ricky and Alex - these two try to manipulate Kurt for their own selfish gains.

I liked Neill and Sadie; their bantering made me laugh.

I really enjoyed this book and I'm definitely adding Elsa to my favourite author list. The emotional depth and
intensity of the characters draw you in quickly. Kurt and James complemented each other beautifully throughout. The author captured Kurt's fears, emotions and insecurities really well. A fantastic read; one I wouldn't hesitate to recommend.
212 reviews
March 10, 2017
Kurt was hurt two years ago and as a result he has trouble letting anyone close to him or to trust enough to be able to let himself be touched. His only true friend right now is Ricky, the person who rescued him. They also have a catering business together. He meets James when they go to deliver the food for a private function he's hosting at his wine bar.

I enjoyed the story. There is lots, and lots of drama and hotness in this one. I liked how James helped Kurt overcome his phobia of being touched in order for them to be together. I didn't like how Kurt just accepted that one of James' ex-lovers, who was in love with him, was staying at his house. I also didn't like how we, the readers, find out about James' past, but he never tells Kurt about it. There is a HEA with no cliffhanger.

I voluntarily reviewed a Hidden Gems ARC of this book.
Profile Image for Patricia Baxes.
3,050 reviews30 followers
March 11, 2017
What an amazing read! Elsa Winters has gifted us with a tapestry woven from pain, suffering, fear, and hope--always beautiful hope that Kurt could learn to trust again and perhaps even find love and happiness. James becomes Kurt's champion and helps him see that he is beautiful and desirable even with his tortured past.

This is a beautifully written--albeit very long--story about two men with dark things in their pasts that find light and love in their future together. (I voluntarily reviewed an advance reader copy of this book and can honestly say that it had a profound effect on me.) What an excellent read...
875 reviews4 followers
March 13, 2017
I voluntarily read an advanced reader copy of this book

Kurt owns a catering business with his best friend Ricky, he was assaulted and left with horrendous scaring on his back. He hasn’t let anyone get close to him since the attack. James was a player, a drug dealer but turned it around when his son Cole came to live with him. James has also decided that Kurt is worth settling down for. He is drawn to Kurt, and is prepared to take his time and gain Kurt’s trust. With both Kurt’s and James baggage can they work things out and get their HEA?
Profile Image for Momma Says: To Read or Not to Read.
3,441 reviews113 followers
March 10, 2017
The story here was heartfelt and touching, but it was just too long and drawn out. Details that don't go anywhere or affect the outcome of the story were distracting. At the same time, there was a distinct lack of details about important things. There was so much build up about what happened to Kurt and when the details finally came out, it was a bit of let down as far as his reaction. James' character ran a bit too hot and cold for me - ruthless ex-drug dealer on one hand (a fact that Kurt never finds out), threatening to kill people who get in his way, and then, giving, lovable guy to others. And sometimes both of those to the same person. The book is well-written and had a lot of potential, but as stated, it was too drawn out and bogged down.
Profile Image for Miriam.
928 reviews
March 11, 2017
I voluntarily reviewed an Advance Reader Copy of this book.

I found Kurt and James together to be equal parts sweet and steamy. But the scenes with James without Kurt, I found James to be setting off lots of warning bells. He was unnecessarily violent and from the bits of his background, it's clear he has a dark history. I do believe people can change, but I'm not sure I am really convinced James has changed.

There were also some plot points that I found not fully fleshed out. There were plenty of hints, but not enough details for me to be really happy with how things played out.
Profile Image for Virginia Lee.
2,465 reviews36 followers
March 13, 2017
This is emotional story of Kurt that has scars from a major accident. He does not let others very close to him. When Kurt meets someone that could make him change his tune of having a relationship. You see the characters slowly coming out of a shell that he has built around himself and with that special man and love he will bloom. James is a busy business owner that has very little time for a relationship, when he sees Kurt and feels the sparks. We get to see all the bumps in road as they try to make a start of their relationship. Will they be able to let the past go and let love into their life? Recommend this book
Profile Image for Shelly Celli.
2,248 reviews6 followers
March 12, 2017
This is one of the few M/M books that I've read and truly enjoyed. Kurt has had so much misfortune in his life and it was great to see him finally come out of his shell, even if I wanted to cry over everything that happened to him. Both him and James have people that have fallen for them but blind to see it, and they cause some problems, but in the end, things just end up being so happy. I felt for Ricky when he finally expressed his feelings for Kurt, but I can see how he may be one to hold Kurt back in the past right away, I just hope he can get past it all and not lose their friendship over it all. Definitely a great read even if you aren't into gay relationships...even the sexy times were hot :) I voluntarily received and reviewed an advanced reader copy of this book.
Profile Image for Megan.
1,469 reviews29 followers
March 12, 2017
Good, a bit confusing with locations, slight bit of unresolved stuff with spouses and kids and pasts, but overall pretty good. Some turmoil with affections and exes and traumatic history, but not enough to turn attention away from the MC's relationship development. Side characters are good, but a bit undeveloped, except for Cole and Ricky.

Overall, it was good, but I'm not blown away. The drama is high, the resolution is kind of meh, but I enjoyed reading it. ARC received from Hidden Gems, review willingly given.
3,926 reviews31 followers
March 10, 2017
Kurt was attacked one night, and he never really recovered from the incident. When James sees Kurt at an event he's hosting, he's immediately drawn to him. But life is never simple, and with ex-lovers popping up and causing more drama, it's hard to see when Kurt and James will ever get to see where their relationship can go. I really enjoyed this book, but there were some chapters where I felt they weren't furthering the story along. But I really liked the main characters, and I loved the steaminess and the sexual tension. I was happy to see how Kurt and James learned to trust each other and move on as well. I voluntarily reviewed an advance reader copy of this book.
Profile Image for John-Torleif  Harris.
2,725 reviews12 followers
March 11, 2017
I only had one real issue with this story and that was - why did the author choose to place this story in the US but not use American terminology? There wouldn't have been any difference in the story if these characters were set in Britain and that would have made references to solicitors (meaning lawyers), jumpers (meaning sweaters), the local council, and many other Britishisms make sense.

Kurt was remarkably blind to the fact that his best friend was in love with him in this story. I suppose that he was so lost in his pain and the trauma of what had been done to him that he had blinded himself to everything around him.

I voluntarily reviewed an ARC of this book.
Profile Image for Destiny Bridwell.
1,719 reviews36 followers
March 7, 2017

I got this book from the author for an honest review. This is my first book that I have read by Elsa Winters. I kind of had an idea what the book was about. It was a little intense and there were some dark moment when it came to the characters pasts. Some of it was not fully explained but the story was well told.

Kurt lets his defend down and ends up scarred by an assault that was not sexual in natured but left his confidence and emotions for love a little shaky. He is remind of that moment in his life each time he looks into the mirror. James has a full plate with his son moving back from college. Helping an ex-lover that hit some bad luck. Plus running his wine bar and he does not have time for love. That is until Kurt came into the bar and he knows that he has to make time. Will they get their happy ending or will Kurt's past and James missteps be their downfall?
Displaying 1 - 30 of 40 reviews

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