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The Boy Who Fell Out of the Sky
In this stunning, emotionally charged memoir, Ken Dornstein interweaves the moving story of his own coming-of-age with the promise of greatness his brother never lived to fulfill. The Boy Who Fell Out of the Sky is a heartbreaking but profoundly hopeful book about finding beauty in the midst of tragedy and making sense of it.
David Dornstein was twenty-five years old, a handsome, charismatic young man on the verge of becoming an extraordinary writer, when he boarded Pan Am Flight 103 from London on the evening of December 21, 1988. Thirty-eight minutes after takeoff, he died, along with the 258 other passengers and crew, when a terrorist’s plastic explosive ripped the plane apart over Lockerbie, Scotland.
David’s brother, Ken, was nineteen, a college sophomore home on winter break, when the call came. All his life Ken had looked up to David, confided in him, followed where he led. David’s death left Ken with a void that both crushed and consumed him. What were his brother’s plans when he died? Was David really carrying home a draft of the great novel everyone knew was in him? Was he in love with the woman he was living with overseas? Ken Dornstein needed to learn the truth about his brother’s life and death. In this harrowing and affecting memoir, he records what he found out.
It was years before Ken could bring himself to confront the stacks of notebooks and letters David left behind, but once he began to read he was drawn deep into his brother’s world. From David’s early obsession with writing down his every thought to his misadventures on the streets of New York, from an unraveling love affair in Israel to a devastating childhood secret, piece by piece Ken assembles a complex, disturbing portrait of an artist struggling to find a voice for passions that often threatened to tear him apart. Then, by chance, Ken runs into David’s college girlfriend on a train and everything changes once again. He starts to question his motives and his memories, and finally sets off on a complicated journey to finish the book that his brother started.
As haunting as a dream, as electrifying as the day’s news, The Boy Who Fell Out of the Sky is an incandescent and unforgettable account of one man’s struggle to find inspiration in his brother’s life and create a life of his own. What begins as a tragedy turns into a love story of deeply affirming power.
David Dornstein was twenty-five years old, a handsome, charismatic young man on the verge of becoming an extraordinary writer, when he boarded Pan Am Flight 103 from London on the evening of December 21, 1988. Thirty-eight minutes after takeoff, he died, along with the 258 other passengers and crew, when a terrorist’s plastic explosive ripped the plane apart over Lockerbie, Scotland.
David’s brother, Ken, was nineteen, a college sophomore home on winter break, when the call came. All his life Ken had looked up to David, confided in him, followed where he led. David’s death left Ken with a void that both crushed and consumed him. What were his brother’s plans when he died? Was David really carrying home a draft of the great novel everyone knew was in him? Was he in love with the woman he was living with overseas? Ken Dornstein needed to learn the truth about his brother’s life and death. In this harrowing and affecting memoir, he records what he found out.
It was years before Ken could bring himself to confront the stacks of notebooks and letters David left behind, but once he began to read he was drawn deep into his brother’s world. From David’s early obsession with writing down his every thought to his misadventures on the streets of New York, from an unraveling love affair in Israel to a devastating childhood secret, piece by piece Ken assembles a complex, disturbing portrait of an artist struggling to find a voice for passions that often threatened to tear him apart. Then, by chance, Ken runs into David’s college girlfriend on a train and everything changes once again. He starts to question his motives and his memories, and finally sets off on a complicated journey to finish the book that his brother started.
As haunting as a dream, as electrifying as the day’s news, The Boy Who Fell Out of the Sky is an incandescent and unforgettable account of one man’s struggle to find inspiration in his brother’s life and create a life of his own. What begins as a tragedy turns into a love story of deeply affirming power.
320 pages, Hardcover
First published January 1, 2006
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651 people want to read
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 96 reviews
July 19, 2007
The author lost his brother in the Pan Am Flight 103 disaster. This book probably only serves to remember loved ones of his brother, not the average reader. Although I felt great sympathy for the author, he obviously has serious emotional problems of his own, judging by his relationships that follow the disaster. This book was truly a grind to get through and lacked the author's real emotions in his prose. A writer either needs to be willing to give of himself to his readers or don't bother.
July 12, 2011
On page 206 of Ken Dornstein's "The Boy Who Fell out of the Sky" he "...wondered how long I would dedicate my life to retracing his steps." The person he is referring to is his brother, David, who was tragically killed on December 21st, 1988, when Pan Am Flight 103 exploded over Lockerbie, Scotland. I, myself, wondered the same thing. How much time would he dedicate to retracing his brother's steps, and how long could I stand reading about it? While I understand Dornstein's need to grieve the loss of his brother and to make sense of his death, even to write about it, I don't understand the necessity to have us read about it, except in that he is fulfilling his brother's unfulfilled need to write, finish, and publish something of his own. This book is a hot mess in terms of chronology, writing style, laborious detail, repetition, etc. I struggled to plod through this book - it took me over a week - hoping that there would eventually be something redeeming about it. I am afraid I was disappointed.
Lest you think that this is the story of what led up to this act of terrorism, the event itself, and the aftermath, be warned that "The Boy Who Fell out of the Sky" is not this at all. It is Ken Dornstein's painful, long exploration of his brother's short twenty-five year life, largely through the reading of the copious notebooks David kept in his attempt to be a writer. David clearly suffered from mental health issues - you know, the suffering of an artist and all of that. Years of abuse at the hands of a pedophile, his parents' divorce at a critical stage, and his mother's own mental illness make this understandable. I even wondered at times if David had something to do with the Pan Am Flight 103 incident. And the author appeared to have had/have some mental health issues of his own. At times, the two brothers almost became one, and it was difficult to tell whose story was being told. Dornstein eventually even dated, married, and had children with his brother's former long-time love interest.
There is much here in terms of thematic material to contemplate: the nature of love, memory, loss, grief, divorce, the struggling artist, the battle toward self-realization, the repercussions on the victim of pedophilia, the act of writing, mental health, etc. However, I don't think most readers will struggle through this to get to the conclusions Dornstein draws about these things.Dornstein says on page 286, "There was a time when I might have dedicated my life to finding...that one last detail about David from that one last person still living who'd had contact with him, a detail that would somehow end David's story in a way I could live with." He finally is able to end this story for himself. For me that story could have ended much sooner.
As a young adult librarian, I find nothing here that will draw and keep a teen reader. Not recommended.
Lest you think that this is the story of what led up to this act of terrorism, the event itself, and the aftermath, be warned that "The Boy Who Fell out of the Sky" is not this at all. It is Ken Dornstein's painful, long exploration of his brother's short twenty-five year life, largely through the reading of the copious notebooks David kept in his attempt to be a writer. David clearly suffered from mental health issues - you know, the suffering of an artist and all of that. Years of abuse at the hands of a pedophile, his parents' divorce at a critical stage, and his mother's own mental illness make this understandable. I even wondered at times if David had something to do with the Pan Am Flight 103 incident. And the author appeared to have had/have some mental health issues of his own. At times, the two brothers almost became one, and it was difficult to tell whose story was being told. Dornstein eventually even dated, married, and had children with his brother's former long-time love interest.
There is much here in terms of thematic material to contemplate: the nature of love, memory, loss, grief, divorce, the struggling artist, the battle toward self-realization, the repercussions on the victim of pedophilia, the act of writing, mental health, etc. However, I don't think most readers will struggle through this to get to the conclusions Dornstein draws about these things.Dornstein says on page 286, "There was a time when I might have dedicated my life to finding...that one last detail about David from that one last person still living who'd had contact with him, a detail that would somehow end David's story in a way I could live with." He finally is able to end this story for himself. For me that story could have ended much sooner.
As a young adult librarian, I find nothing here that will draw and keep a teen reader. Not recommended.
March 24, 2008
December 21, 1988 was Syracuse University's 9-11 - among the 282 people who were killed when a terrorist bomb blew up an airplane over Lockerbie, Scotland were 34 Syracuse University students who were returning home after a semester abroad. Eighteen years after living through this tragedy with the Syracuse community, I discovered this book and still couldn't read it for more than a year. The author of the book, Ken Dornstein, also lost his brother, David, that day, an aspiring writer who was flying home from London to see his family. In an attempt to discover more about his older brother, Ken goes on a journey - from his brother's closet where he finds boxes
of old manuscripts to Lockerbie where he discovers answers to questions he never even thought about. He wants some closure to
the tragedy but discovers the parallels that his own personal frustrations, hopes and dreams have to his brother's. This is a very thoughtful book written by a loving brother who discovers the essence of the sibling he lost.
of old manuscripts to Lockerbie where he discovers answers to questions he never even thought about. He wants some closure to
the tragedy but discovers the parallels that his own personal frustrations, hopes and dreams have to his brother's. This is a very thoughtful book written by a loving brother who discovers the essence of the sibling he lost.
May 1, 2008
With such a story to tell, you'd think this would be a stunning read. The author's brother, David, who always said he was going to die in a plane crash actually did die in a plane crash (and it's not his fault)? David who always saw his death as the only route to his being published finally gets his wish? It's almost too impossible to be true, yet it is. The surviving brother, Ken, ends up marrying the late brother's girlfriend and insists it had nothing to do with their shared love and mourning for David? How could this not be fascinating? And even more incredibly, it manages not to be as interesting as you'd imagine. Put in the hands of a writer who had a sense of momentum and tension, yes. But here it sits on the page, lacking a pulse. Dornstein is a competent writer, but no more.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
January 10, 2023
Recommended by Nick Hornby in The Complete Polysyllabic Spree.
March 3, 2018
On December 21, 1988, Ken's brother David was killed in the Pan Am Flight 103 flight over Lockerbie, Scotland. David was a writer. Ken tries to make peace with David's death by reading the stacks of notebooks and letters left behind. When doing so he finds something he was not expecting.
Good book but not what I was expecting. At times it feels more like a book about Ken than it does about David.
Good book but not what I was expecting. At times it feels more like a book about Ken than it does about David.
December 6, 2022
A true story. On December 21, 1988 Pan Am Flight 103 left Heathrow Airport in London, and thirty-eight minutes after take-off, the wide-bodied jumbo jet exploded over Lockerbie, Scotland. All 259 passengers aboard, and every crew member died, their bodies plummeting (mostly intact), six miles to the earth in a matter of 3 minutes time. Winds scattered debris and bodies along an 81 mile corridor, covering an 854 square mile area.
The author of this account, Ken Dornstein, had a brother six years his senior named David. He was on that flight. Ken's life was forever changed when his brother fell out of the sky on that day in 1988. His brother was a writer, and quite possibly a genius, who had a tough time finding his "rhythm" in life. Ken found dozens upon dozens, possibly hundreds of notebooks filled with random thoughts, scribblings, rantings, observations, conversations, poetry, essays, short stories, and a variety of manuscripts (started but never completed) that his brother had squirreled away from the time he could hold a pencil until his death at 25 years of age. Over the course of the next 16 years, Ken made it his life mission to read each and every one of those spiral notebooks, with the hope of not only gaining better access to the complexities of his (admired) older brother, but also to try to piece together the possibility of completing David's final manuscript that may or may not have also fallen out of the sky on that fatal day. Ken believed he could not become fully engaged or be able to move forward in his own life until he was able to complete the unfulfilled endeavors of his brother's.
The Boy Who Fell Out of The Sky is a touching story of sibling love and loyalty, and also sheds light on the age-old question: Do we ever really know a person? Really, really know them? What we think we know is often only what another person allows us to know, allow being the operative word.
Have a supply of tissues at hand. This one may stir all kinds of emotions and bring to surface people, places and events that you believed you had reconciled and found a nice, neat compartment for in your heart years ago. We need books like this to remind us (not to scare us) that life is tender and vulnerable and NOW is the time . . . not tomorrow, not next week or next year . . . to live it.
Five Thought Provoking Stars
The author of this account, Ken Dornstein, had a brother six years his senior named David. He was on that flight. Ken's life was forever changed when his brother fell out of the sky on that day in 1988. His brother was a writer, and quite possibly a genius, who had a tough time finding his "rhythm" in life. Ken found dozens upon dozens, possibly hundreds of notebooks filled with random thoughts, scribblings, rantings, observations, conversations, poetry, essays, short stories, and a variety of manuscripts (started but never completed) that his brother had squirreled away from the time he could hold a pencil until his death at 25 years of age. Over the course of the next 16 years, Ken made it his life mission to read each and every one of those spiral notebooks, with the hope of not only gaining better access to the complexities of his (admired) older brother, but also to try to piece together the possibility of completing David's final manuscript that may or may not have also fallen out of the sky on that fatal day. Ken believed he could not become fully engaged or be able to move forward in his own life until he was able to complete the unfulfilled endeavors of his brother's.
The Boy Who Fell Out of The Sky is a touching story of sibling love and loyalty, and also sheds light on the age-old question: Do we ever really know a person? Really, really know them? What we think we know is often only what another person allows us to know, allow being the operative word.
Have a supply of tissues at hand. This one may stir all kinds of emotions and bring to surface people, places and events that you believed you had reconciled and found a nice, neat compartment for in your heart years ago. We need books like this to remind us (not to scare us) that life is tender and vulnerable and NOW is the time . . . not tomorrow, not next week or next year . . . to live it.
Five Thought Provoking Stars
April 7, 2021
דיוויד דורנסטיין היה סופר. כולם ידעו את זה. הוא כתב מגיל צעיר מאוד, ושמר הכל. היו לו בחדרו עשרות מחברות, ואלפי דפים שכתב. ואז, קצת אחרי שאחיו מקבל מכתב ובו הוא מספר על רומן שהוא עמל על כתיבתו ועומד לפרסם, דיוויד עולה על טיסה, והמטוס מתפוצץ. בן עשרים וחמש במותו, מותיר אחריו דיוויד אח צעיר והמום, אב אבל, ואמא שמעולם לא היתה נוכחת, אבל מאמצת אל חיקה את האבל עם הילת הקורבן הסובל שנלווית אליו. האח קן יוצא למסע בעקבות דיוויד, ובעיקר בעקבות כתביו, במטרה להשלים לאחר מותו את מה שדיוויד לא הצליח לעשות בחייו.
למגינת ליבו של קן התוכנית לא עובדת טוב. מתברר שלמרות ש"כולם" ידעו שדיוויד סופר, הוא לא הצליח למצוא את הרומן המהולל שהיה בסיום כתיבה. ולא שום טיוטות, ולא שום יצירה אחרת הראוייה לפרסום. הרבה התחלות, בהחלט. אפילו הרבה מאוד. וגם הרבה מכתבים, מחשבות מקוריות, הגיגים. שיחות בעל פה עם חברים העלו עוד הרבה חוויות ורעיונות מקוריים, אבל שום דבר כתוב. המסע של קן בעקבות דיוויד, כולל מפגשים אישיים ואינטימיים עם חברות עבר של דיוויד, כולל נישואים לאחת מהן. הספר הזה הוא פרי המסע הזה. מהספר עולה בצורה חריפה דמות של אדם מוכשר מאוד, ויצירתי מאוד, שמעולם לא הצליח להביא משהו לידי גמר. גם קן מתאר קשיי כתיבה שלו-עצמו, ואת הקושי שחווה בניסיון להביא דברים לידי גמר. אבל קן מצליח. אולי כי הוא חי. אולי כי הוא התבגר, ועבר את גילו של דיוויד כשמת. ואולי כי הוא פחות יצירתי. אין לדעת, למען האמת.
הסיפור הזה, מעבר לסיפור של החמצה גדולה, ולתיאור טרגדיה גדולה, לוקה באותה בעייה שעליה כתבתי בסקירה על הספר "המלחמה הסודית של אבא". כאשר עיתונאי כותב על נושא אישי, בעיקר אם הוא לא מצליח למצוא בנושא את התוכן שלו ציפה כשהתחיל את הפרוייקט, הוא כותב על מה שיש, ולא עורך כראוי את הדברים. הספר הזה הוא מעניין בעיקרון, אבל נכנסים אליו גם חלקים פחות רלוונטיים ולא מעניינים. כמו הקשיים של קן עצמו, בעיות חיי האהבה שלו, דרכי עיבוד האבל, ותיאור האסון. טיול בלוקרבי, מקום ההתרסקות הוא רלוונטי מאוד לעלילה, אבל דברים אחרים, כמו תיאור המשפט הם פחות רלוונטיים. הספר נכתב כספר תיעודי לכל דבר, כולל הערות טרחניות למדי בסוף. הרעיון מעניין, חבל שלא היתה עריכה מספקת.
July 13, 2025
I thought that the factual parts about the Lockerbie crash and the author's attempts to investigate his brother's final days and moments were the most interesting sections of the book. The dead brother, with his obvious manic-depressive issues, was more interesting than the author's life.
March 18, 2017
I see this book as a tremendous act of courage by Ken Dornstein. Although it seems he had no other option but to write about his brother's tragic death, he could have written many other stories. By entwining his own pain, confusion, faults, longing, and fears with those of his brother's, he gives the reader a double-tracked exploration of an often desperate life cut short and a likewise desperate query of what it means to live a life truly your own, or if that is even possible. This is a process, not a journey (which implies an end) enlightened and well carried by Dornstein's thoughtful, beautiful writing.
November 23, 2021
I didn’t expect to love this book. I feel emotionally connected to the Lockerbie bombing because of a play I directed in high school, so when I discovered that there was a memoir about the attack, I honestly felt obligated to read it. I’m so glad I did.
I almost immediately got swept up in the characters and found the dual drama of uncovering David (the brother)’s story and Ken’s journey to uncover it utterly compelling. I read the first half of the book in one sitting. (One sitting! This is a book about grief and some journals!) I feel almost lucky to have experienced grief through Ken’s story, knowing it will always be there for me when I inevitably lose someone.
I’m so glad that the author didn’t just publish David’s journals as a narrative in and of themselves. While David’s larger than life persona was very interesting, I feel like I discovered so much more truth about him and his life through Ken’s context and in juxtaposition to Ken’s life. Also, because David was such a larger than life person who seemed to live a bit in his own fantasy world, his narrative through-line threatened to get dull and repetitive. Ken was the main character for me, and I’m grateful for it. I really was compelled to find out what would happen next to him. And I think it allowed the story to have more hope.
The goodreads description states that this book is “stunning.” I couldn’t agree more.
I almost immediately got swept up in the characters and found the dual drama of uncovering David (the brother)’s story and Ken’s journey to uncover it utterly compelling. I read the first half of the book in one sitting. (One sitting! This is a book about grief and some journals!) I feel almost lucky to have experienced grief through Ken’s story, knowing it will always be there for me when I inevitably lose someone.
I’m so glad that the author didn’t just publish David’s journals as a narrative in and of themselves. While David’s larger than life persona was very interesting, I feel like I discovered so much more truth about him and his life through Ken’s context and in juxtaposition to Ken’s life. Also, because David was such a larger than life person who seemed to live a bit in his own fantasy world, his narrative through-line threatened to get dull and repetitive. Ken was the main character for me, and I’m grateful for it. I really was compelled to find out what would happen next to him. And I think it allowed the story to have more hope.
The goodreads description states that this book is “stunning.” I couldn’t agree more.
February 8, 2012
The first and last part of the book were interesting. It told the story of the airline that was bombed out of the sky over Lockerbie a few years ago. The author's brother was on the flight. He researched what happened and tracked his brother as best as he could. The middle of the book was a rambling of the author's concerning his brother and his piles of notebooks as he aspired to be a writer. Also about the author's life during that time. Both seem to have mental issues. I suppose he was trying to write a tribute to his brother. I read some of the middle, but soon realized the need to skip and check out the ending. A good choice.
December 10, 2018
The first part of this book is worth it as Dornstein's family deals with the loss of his brother David in the Lockerbie bombing. However, the book then follows Dornstein's pursuit of finding out who his brother was and the pursuit gets lost in the details. What could have been enlightening turned out to be tedious. Inclusions of numerous manic and self-obsessed journal entries became redundant. The loss for Dornstein was life-changing and he certainly deserves all of our sympathies. Perhaps it was necessary to know his brother to understand why Dornstein wrote this book.
November 9, 2008
I gave up on this book after about 120 pages. I found both the narrator and his brother (who died in the Lockerbie bombing) to be whiny, wanky, self-indulgent people who needed a ton of therapy. Nothing about David's writing struck me as genius, and I found it odd that his brother ended up in relationships with his dead brother's ex-girlfriends.
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November 22, 2009I learned that listening by listening to NPR, you can find some good reads.
June 28, 2020
This a book filled with grief. In 1988, Ken Dornstein’s brother, David, died in the plane crash over Lockerbie. An awful bombing, with awful consequences, and this has, naturally, impacted Ken’s life forever.
I picked up this book because Lockerbie was one of those morbidly fascinating things that happen close to home. Something you need to wrap your head around, something horrific happening in a place you’ve been, a place so close, a place which could have been your own had the bomb gone off slightly later. I was desperate to know more.
Yet, instead of a deep dive into the happenings and consequences of the bombing, The Boy Who Fell Out of the Sky is more of a memoir encompassing both brothers’ lives. It’s painful to read, full of memories and discoveries which felt like old and new wounds simultaneously. Ken considers his brother’s last moments, his hopes for the future, his ambition to write the Great American Novel. And yet, he fell to earth, landing in some poor woman’s garden, with his personal effects finally being posted over to his family in America.
This is a strange collection of thoughts, with disjointed chronology, odd behaviours, and a multitude of self-deprecating passages. Ken seemed almost to feel guilt at his remaining alive whilst his brother didn’t have this freedom. It’s clear to see the effect the death had on his mental health, then and still. I can only hope writing this novel has helped release some of the grief, and allow some healing to begin.
Despite all this, despite the overload of emotions, the difficult lives the brothers had already led before this catastrophe, the sheer horror of it all, I felt detached somehow. There was something about his writing which left me in the cold, despite my curiosity over Lockerbie, despite my need to learn more, and despite my compassion. I struggled to read through, found it more and more sluggish the more I read. I connected with the emotion, but only partially. I understood the grief, but not entirely. There was something clinically offsetting about the whole thing. I can’t put my finger on it.
Nevertheless, it’s clear The Boy Who Fell Out of the Sky is a labour of love, and I respect that. I truly hope both brothers, wherever they are, are at peace.
I picked up this book because Lockerbie was one of those morbidly fascinating things that happen close to home. Something you need to wrap your head around, something horrific happening in a place you’ve been, a place so close, a place which could have been your own had the bomb gone off slightly later. I was desperate to know more.
Yet, instead of a deep dive into the happenings and consequences of the bombing, The Boy Who Fell Out of the Sky is more of a memoir encompassing both brothers’ lives. It’s painful to read, full of memories and discoveries which felt like old and new wounds simultaneously. Ken considers his brother’s last moments, his hopes for the future, his ambition to write the Great American Novel. And yet, he fell to earth, landing in some poor woman’s garden, with his personal effects finally being posted over to his family in America.
This is a strange collection of thoughts, with disjointed chronology, odd behaviours, and a multitude of self-deprecating passages. Ken seemed almost to feel guilt at his remaining alive whilst his brother didn’t have this freedom. It’s clear to see the effect the death had on his mental health, then and still. I can only hope writing this novel has helped release some of the grief, and allow some healing to begin.
Despite all this, despite the overload of emotions, the difficult lives the brothers had already led before this catastrophe, the sheer horror of it all, I felt detached somehow. There was something about his writing which left me in the cold, despite my curiosity over Lockerbie, despite my need to learn more, and despite my compassion. I struggled to read through, found it more and more sluggish the more I read. I connected with the emotion, but only partially. I understood the grief, but not entirely. There was something clinically offsetting about the whole thing. I can’t put my finger on it.
Nevertheless, it’s clear The Boy Who Fell Out of the Sky is a labour of love, and I respect that. I truly hope both brothers, wherever they are, are at peace.
March 14, 2015
March 14, 2015
Across all commercial airlines, accidents occur at only a rate of one per 1.2 million flights. Unfortunately for David Dornstein and the rest of the crew of the Pan Am Flight 103 it hasn’t been the same chance. The novel “The Boy Who Fell Out of the Sky” by Ken Dornstein talks about how Ken, his brother interweaves the story of his grief and his quest into completing the promise of greatness his brother never lived to fulfill. In the midst of tragedy Ken manages to find beauty and compassion in his brother’s past. This story is about the importance of explaining that unfortunate events in life should not grasp the survivors in grief but let them be able to look ahead and let go of the emotional state it had initially put the person in.
The story of David Dornstein is engorged with mysterious unexplained elements that seem to trigger his brother Ken throughout his journey to unearth the true about his dead brother. This story explores the complex journey of Ken Dornstein that has to undergo a complete change in him when his brother David, dies in a Pan Am Flight 103 on the evening of December 21, 1988. This memoir charged of emotion and grief sightsees the outcomes of loosing a loved one especially in this case where Ken desperately goes on a journey to anxiously find the trail of his brother and learn about his past. First, he decides to go through the work of his brother, every single letter, poems, curious theories and many more pieces of writing he left behind and that is where Ken discovers the many truths about his brother such as the fact that he had a relationship with a woman named Katherine. Close to this story to David’s tragedy, the readers learn one to Ken himself. Indeed, the death of a brother can totally alter the mindset of the close ones. However, in Ken’s case it goes deeper to his childhood and it is easily understood how this memoir unearths the parallels of his own tragedy but which unknowingly his brother was also part of. When Ken learnt all of the atrocities that marked David for life he also discovered his own fears and frustrations, in which this journey could be considered as a therapy. David grew mentally disturbed as during his childhood his parents divorced and his mother was sent to a private institution and at that time he was older than Ken and suffered more from the loss. Also, through interviewing many of David’s friends he highly suspects David of being a victim of sexual abuse by one of his neighbors but when confronted, it turns off the doubt in the readers. Finally this book could be considered as trophy to David’s struggle to desperately becoming a writer and how this book made him from above, “smile about it. Words were his life. And now, the words he left behind would be more vital than ever” (Dornstein, 7). In conclusion, this story beautifully explores the nature of love and a battle through self-recognition.
Death is a pinnacle element in this novel as it is addressed all throughout the book, being the most prominent theme. As the novel opens up, straight from the beginning, the readers can easily discern a hold in the writer to contain his emotions, as the melancholy towards the situation is hard to cover. Seeing how Ken is ready to do everything in order to complete his dead brother’s dream shows his compassion as a way of emotional and physical release from the grief. Furthermore, the safety and warmth that he finds in David’s writings is somewhat fascinating as he considers them as a part of his brother and lives small moments with him through his sayings and despite its foolishness, “the idea of saving David lingered” (Dornstein 128). Also, the work of the book “The Boy Who Fell Out of the Sky” suggests and foreshadows that indeed for Ken, he will be able to overcome the grief as it keeps him going and provides mental support. Additionally, the more he finds out about the truth, the more he is appeased and feels that his brother is resting in peace away from the problems. Therefore, it is obvious for the readers to see the writing’s purposes throughout the story suggesting and giving a better state of mind to Ken.
The tone of this book reads a note of two opposite values, moving on and holding on to the idea of hope. After the death of his brother, Ken has to go through a world of suffering, but still holds on to the idea of a better future. In this case Ken doesn’t really know what his hope is about because his brother is already dead, perhaps it is the idea of him coming back or it is just simply him being lost in his thoughts. Moreover, in times of grief, being completely disoriented is comprehensible and normal as the family looses part of themselves too. Furthermore, as more of that hope grows in Ken’s mind, the more he wants to keep going and give his maximum into finding the truth about what his brother lived and makes him grow more curious and look deeper. In the other hand, Ken feels like he has to move on and continue with his life as he knows deep inside him that no matter what he does it wouldn’t bring him back. Additionally, as Ken advances in his journey, he starts questioning his motives and memories and even more as he enquiries in his ability and about whether or not it is his “responsibility to save his brother” (Dornstein 128). Therefore, the two opposite ideas advantages in the flow of the story developing a meaningful text.
In conclusion, it is very important for a grieving person to accept death and continue to live life as it was offered to one for longer and be able to enjoy life. Furthermore, death and its many “side effects” on the survivors of a close relative could be considered the hardest battles against oneself as questions come crumbling down to the mind. Additionally, despite the drama caused by other relatives the people truly hurt are those who keep it all in, which in this case was Ken, digging deep into his brother’s past. Around the world approximately 150,000 people die daily and for those lost in the confusion of grief this story might inspire them to continue what their dead wanted to accomplish before dying. However, the most important lesson to remember from this is that if the grief stops one for living it is an alarm to understand that it doesn’t mean someone’s life is done that the survivor’s is too.
Across all commercial airlines, accidents occur at only a rate of one per 1.2 million flights. Unfortunately for David Dornstein and the rest of the crew of the Pan Am Flight 103 it hasn’t been the same chance. The novel “The Boy Who Fell Out of the Sky” by Ken Dornstein talks about how Ken, his brother interweaves the story of his grief and his quest into completing the promise of greatness his brother never lived to fulfill. In the midst of tragedy Ken manages to find beauty and compassion in his brother’s past. This story is about the importance of explaining that unfortunate events in life should not grasp the survivors in grief but let them be able to look ahead and let go of the emotional state it had initially put the person in.
The story of David Dornstein is engorged with mysterious unexplained elements that seem to trigger his brother Ken throughout his journey to unearth the true about his dead brother. This story explores the complex journey of Ken Dornstein that has to undergo a complete change in him when his brother David, dies in a Pan Am Flight 103 on the evening of December 21, 1988. This memoir charged of emotion and grief sightsees the outcomes of loosing a loved one especially in this case where Ken desperately goes on a journey to anxiously find the trail of his brother and learn about his past. First, he decides to go through the work of his brother, every single letter, poems, curious theories and many more pieces of writing he left behind and that is where Ken discovers the many truths about his brother such as the fact that he had a relationship with a woman named Katherine. Close to this story to David’s tragedy, the readers learn one to Ken himself. Indeed, the death of a brother can totally alter the mindset of the close ones. However, in Ken’s case it goes deeper to his childhood and it is easily understood how this memoir unearths the parallels of his own tragedy but which unknowingly his brother was also part of. When Ken learnt all of the atrocities that marked David for life he also discovered his own fears and frustrations, in which this journey could be considered as a therapy. David grew mentally disturbed as during his childhood his parents divorced and his mother was sent to a private institution and at that time he was older than Ken and suffered more from the loss. Also, through interviewing many of David’s friends he highly suspects David of being a victim of sexual abuse by one of his neighbors but when confronted, it turns off the doubt in the readers. Finally this book could be considered as trophy to David’s struggle to desperately becoming a writer and how this book made him from above, “smile about it. Words were his life. And now, the words he left behind would be more vital than ever” (Dornstein, 7). In conclusion, this story beautifully explores the nature of love and a battle through self-recognition.
Death is a pinnacle element in this novel as it is addressed all throughout the book, being the most prominent theme. As the novel opens up, straight from the beginning, the readers can easily discern a hold in the writer to contain his emotions, as the melancholy towards the situation is hard to cover. Seeing how Ken is ready to do everything in order to complete his dead brother’s dream shows his compassion as a way of emotional and physical release from the grief. Furthermore, the safety and warmth that he finds in David’s writings is somewhat fascinating as he considers them as a part of his brother and lives small moments with him through his sayings and despite its foolishness, “the idea of saving David lingered” (Dornstein 128). Also, the work of the book “The Boy Who Fell Out of the Sky” suggests and foreshadows that indeed for Ken, he will be able to overcome the grief as it keeps him going and provides mental support. Additionally, the more he finds out about the truth, the more he is appeased and feels that his brother is resting in peace away from the problems. Therefore, it is obvious for the readers to see the writing’s purposes throughout the story suggesting and giving a better state of mind to Ken.
The tone of this book reads a note of two opposite values, moving on and holding on to the idea of hope. After the death of his brother, Ken has to go through a world of suffering, but still holds on to the idea of a better future. In this case Ken doesn’t really know what his hope is about because his brother is already dead, perhaps it is the idea of him coming back or it is just simply him being lost in his thoughts. Moreover, in times of grief, being completely disoriented is comprehensible and normal as the family looses part of themselves too. Furthermore, as more of that hope grows in Ken’s mind, the more he wants to keep going and give his maximum into finding the truth about what his brother lived and makes him grow more curious and look deeper. In the other hand, Ken feels like he has to move on and continue with his life as he knows deep inside him that no matter what he does it wouldn’t bring him back. Additionally, as Ken advances in his journey, he starts questioning his motives and memories and even more as he enquiries in his ability and about whether or not it is his “responsibility to save his brother” (Dornstein 128). Therefore, the two opposite ideas advantages in the flow of the story developing a meaningful text.
In conclusion, it is very important for a grieving person to accept death and continue to live life as it was offered to one for longer and be able to enjoy life. Furthermore, death and its many “side effects” on the survivors of a close relative could be considered the hardest battles against oneself as questions come crumbling down to the mind. Additionally, despite the drama caused by other relatives the people truly hurt are those who keep it all in, which in this case was Ken, digging deep into his brother’s past. Around the world approximately 150,000 people die daily and for those lost in the confusion of grief this story might inspire them to continue what their dead wanted to accomplish before dying. However, the most important lesson to remember from this is that if the grief stops one for living it is an alarm to understand that it doesn’t mean someone’s life is done that the survivor’s is too.
December 15, 2017
As a former library tech, I found this to be a curiously cataloged book, found in the 100's section of the library (155.937- Psychology). It is part memoir, part biography, part historical regarding the events associated with the bombing of Pan Am Flight 103 over Lockerbie, Scotland, and a look at the relationship between siblings. What I found most interesting in this book was the relationship of the two brothers. Having recently read a book about Vincent and Theo Van Gogh, I found myself thinking about the similarities of both sets of brothers and the devotion of one brother to the other in spite of so much inner turmoil and blind ambition in one brother; in both stories, the younger brother never gives up on the older, even when death has separated them. This was not an easy read, with death as an overall theme, but I did feel drawn to continue as an observer on a journey with Ken as he set out to discover who his brother was and what happened to him in his final days on earth. As one reviewer observes of the author, he is "in the search for truth about his brother, one whose goal is the ultimate mystery, the secret of a soul."
January 21, 2019
This book is written by the brother of one of the people killed by a bomb onboard Pan Am Flight 103, and fell to earth over Lockerbie, Scotland.
It's a wander through David's life, and more so, his writing and attempts to be a famous writer. It's a raw and unflattering memorandum of David, as Ken here works through his grief, and the what ifs, and should haves.
Bookended by the details of the flight, and investigation and trial, Ken has delved into memory and David's almost daily journals and notebooks and letters. The flight details kept me reading, whilst sometimes the pain of reflection and the tormented life of David is recounted.
Ken works through David's life, his passions and his loves (literally and figuratively), in the process of working out how to let go of his brother's overwhelming presence in his life.
At times an uncomfortable review of two brothers and their lives, their connectedness, and influence on each other; but compelling enough to continue to closure.
It's a wander through David's life, and more so, his writing and attempts to be a famous writer. It's a raw and unflattering memorandum of David, as Ken here works through his grief, and the what ifs, and should haves.
Bookended by the details of the flight, and investigation and trial, Ken has delved into memory and David's almost daily journals and notebooks and letters. The flight details kept me reading, whilst sometimes the pain of reflection and the tormented life of David is recounted.
Ken works through David's life, his passions and his loves (literally and figuratively), in the process of working out how to let go of his brother's overwhelming presence in his life.
At times an uncomfortable review of two brothers and their lives, their connectedness, and influence on each other; but compelling enough to continue to closure.
June 2, 2017
Maybe I'm the wrong person to read this book. I have a feeling that it would be far more gripping for someone who knows firsthand the pain and confusion associated with losing someone suddenly and violently, but considering that I've been lucky enough not to go through something like Dornstein, I found his story (and writing style) to be uncomfortable and disjointed. Maybe that's the point; after all, when is death ever a smooth and enjoyable process? That having been said, I couldn't even finish this memoir. I don't want to criticize the plot too much because Dornstein was clearly being incredibly vulnerable and honest with readers about his grieving process (or initial lack thereof), but the first half was so slow moving I found myself peeking ahead at the next chapter to see if anything had changed by that point. Spoiler alert: it hadn't.
July 24, 2021
Bryn has been recommending this book for a while. It was a compelling read, and not just because it was about a man who lost his brother to the Lockerbie bombing. A friend of mine had also lost a brother in the Pam AM bombing and had written a book discussing grief, forgiveness and reconciliation. What was unusual about this story was an in depth look at a young man obsessed with literary greatness. The author had many journals, letters, people and a close relationship to pull from. He was troubled and had even foreshadowed his own death. Despite a 6 year age difference, there was an enmeshing of their lives, first established by David (the victim), but then carried on by the author in an uncanny way. It just made for an interesting journey for the author to let go.
May 22, 2022
An unusual memoir, coming-of-age tale, and remembrance of a dead brother. Dragged in the middle, but ultimately I found it worth reading. The author denied and internalized his grief so completely that he spent years in a struggle trying to face his brother's death, untangle his own sense of self from his brother, and write this. Both brothers' struggles with anxiety, neurosis, and avoidance - without a deep examination of their similarity in this vein - made this frustrating, but the book is a pretty good account of a life cut short and a sibling's attempt to face it and make meaning out of it.
January 9, 2018
It took me a long time to work through this book, and it was rather work. I kept hoping for more 'something' to justify this book more.
I feel for this brother. It's a hell of a way to lose a sibling/loved one.
Maybe that's the point of the story is to give merit to EVERYONE's stories, even if they are not 'exceptional' as judged by society.
[I lived in Syracuse, NY at the time this tragic incident occurred, and so many young university students died. I think this is why I continued to the end of the book.)
I feel for this brother. It's a hell of a way to lose a sibling/loved one.
Maybe that's the point of the story is to give merit to EVERYONE's stories, even if they are not 'exceptional' as judged by society.
[I lived in Syracuse, NY at the time this tragic incident occurred, and so many young university students died. I think this is why I continued to the end of the book.)
October 3, 2021
Mixed emotions with this book. Grief is a complex thing, people do and say very strange things and I found the authors need to date his brother's ex girlfriends slightly disconcerting. As the book went on, it became clear that David was a very fragile, almost damaged young man and that his brother, Ken, whilst researching his brother's life, seemed to absorb this negativity and almost become his brother. I almost gave up on this book, something I rarely do but am glad I persevered as I became genuinely invested in the lives of all involved.
February 17, 2020
I had a very hard time getting into this story. I thought the beginning was okay and it peaked my curiosity, but once I got to the middle of the story it felt like the author went off on a rant about his own feelings and thoughts/guilt about his brother dying on the flight. I thought that the ending was okay as well, but this could have been a much better story if the middle was touched up a bit. I had a hard time staying focused on what the topic was supposed to be about.
April 11, 2021
Enjoyed it. Took me awhile to read. I think it was just a little hard for me to get through because I couldn't imagine what it would be like to lose a relative that way, with so many unanswered questions for years. Hopefully the end of the trial helped a lot of families find peace of mind and closure. Was hoping they named their baby David, but I understand why they didn't. Glad I read it.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
September 14, 2025
Not what I expected (a biography of his brother and what led up to his final flight), but an in-depth exploration of his brother, for better or worse. David seems to have struggled with sexual abuse and mental health issues which the author investigates, keeping one eye on history and one on his own journey.
July 28, 2020
A very different book dealing with the death of Dornstein's brother in the Lockebie plane bombing. I think his brother was bi-polar. His own interaction with that death and his brother's dissatisfaction with himself make this poignant.
March 20, 2023
3.5
I think the subject matter of this memoir really reeled me in and I just felt so much for the author. I can't imagine losing such a unique and vibrant, yet manic sibling and then feeling somehow responsible for carrying on their legacy as a writer.
I think the subject matter of this memoir really reeled me in and I just felt so much for the author. I can't imagine losing such a unique and vibrant, yet manic sibling and then feeling somehow responsible for carrying on their legacy as a writer.
July 13, 2025
Brother of a Lockerbie jet bombing victim tries to make sense of his brother’s life through his various writings, his friends and the places he visited. In doing so, it seemed, he was trying to make sense of his own life.
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