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Thomas & Mary
30 Jahre sind Thomas und Mary verheiratet. Sie haben zwei Kinder, einen Hund, ein Haus im Grünen. Aber nach Jahren des Auseinanderlebens kommt es endlich zu einer Entscheidung.
In dieser umgekehrten Liebesgeschichte erzählt Tim Parks, was passiert, wenn die Zuwendung und Hingabe, die ein Paar am Anfang füreinander hatte, sich verwandelt: in lange Spaziergänge mit dem Hund, in die Vermeidung, zur gleichen Zeit ins Bett zu gehen, in Spannungen, wer die Kühlschranktür offen gelassen oder den Tisch nicht abgeräumt hat.
Zwischen Komödie und Tragödie pendelt dieser wunderbar leichte Roman, in dem 30 Jahre Ehe mit kühlem Kopf und warmem Herzen überprüft werden, die Abhängigkeiten, die Zärtlichkeit, der Verrat. Es ist die leidenschaftlich intime Chronik einer Ehe, die Tim Parks erzählt, wie sie vielen Leserinnen und Lesern bekannt sein dürfte. Und wie er die Ausläufer des schmerzlichen Verlusts schildert, der durch die ganze Familie geht, wenn das Paar im Grunde seiner Herzen beschlossen hat, dass es vorbei ist das macht ihm keiner nach.
In dieser umgekehrten Liebesgeschichte erzählt Tim Parks, was passiert, wenn die Zuwendung und Hingabe, die ein Paar am Anfang füreinander hatte, sich verwandelt: in lange Spaziergänge mit dem Hund, in die Vermeidung, zur gleichen Zeit ins Bett zu gehen, in Spannungen, wer die Kühlschranktür offen gelassen oder den Tisch nicht abgeräumt hat.
Zwischen Komödie und Tragödie pendelt dieser wunderbar leichte Roman, in dem 30 Jahre Ehe mit kühlem Kopf und warmem Herzen überprüft werden, die Abhängigkeiten, die Zärtlichkeit, der Verrat. Es ist die leidenschaftlich intime Chronik einer Ehe, die Tim Parks erzählt, wie sie vielen Leserinnen und Lesern bekannt sein dürfte. Und wie er die Ausläufer des schmerzlichen Verlusts schildert, der durch die ganze Familie geht, wenn das Paar im Grunde seiner Herzen beschlossen hat, dass es vorbei ist das macht ihm keiner nach.
- GenresFiction
336 pages, Hardcover
Published February 15, 2017
3 people are currently reading
140 people want to read
About the author
Tim Parks
121 books585 followersBorn in Manchester in 1954, Tim Parks grew up in London and studied at Cambridge and Harvard. In 1981 he moved to Italy where he has lived ever since, raising a family of three children. He has written fourteen novels including Europa (shortlisted for the Booker prize), Destiny, Cleaver, and most recently In Extremis.
During the nineties he wrote two, personal and highly popular accounts of his life in northern Italy, Italian Neighbours and An Italian Education. These were complemented in 2002 by A Season with Verona, a grand overview of Italian life as seen through the passion of football. Other non-fiction works include a history of the Medici bank in 15th century Florence, Medici Money and a memoir on health, illness and meditation, Teach Us to Sit Still. In 2013 Tim published his most recent non-fiction work on Italy, Italian Ways, on and off the rails from Milan to Palermo.
Aside from his own writing, Tim has translated works by Moravia, Calvino, Calasso, Machiavelli and Leopardi; his critical book, Translating Style is considered a classic in its field. He is presently working on a translation of Cesare Pavese's masterpiece, The Moon and the Bonfires.
A regular contributor to the New York Review of Books and the London Review of Books, his many essays are collected in Hell and Back, The Fighter, A Literary Tour of Italy, and Life and Work.
Over the last five years he has been publishing a series of blogs on writing, reading, translation and the like in the New York Review online. These have recently been collected in Where I am Reading From and Pen in Hand.
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 34 reviews
December 24, 2019
It's the end of December and this is only the second book this year that I have closed prematurely. Tim Parks once was one of my favorite writers, 2 of his books (Destiny and Dreams of Rivers and Seas) still are in my top 20. But with a number of his other, more recent works, I'm clearly having a hard time. This is one of them.
It describes the stormy marriage and growing apart of Thomas and Mary, both middle-aged, with 2 children. Through successive fragments we see how their relationship gradually derails, although they apparently continue to have a very strong bond. “It was a long and complicated relationship, she said. A bit like a Gothic castle, with parts that are still liveable and parts that crumbled to ruin ages ago, and very likely parts with skeletons in every cupboard, and for sure a ghost or two in the cellars or the attic. Not to mention the secret passages! And the rats behind the tapestries!”
The book has a kind of vignette structure, with regularly different narrative perspectives and a different focus. Thomas's psychological household in particular is thus exposed, and it is not an attractive one (he has a bunch of mistresses), although Parks also explains why that is (his special relationship with his distant mother, for example). And, however unlikely, after a while you get a certain sympathy with him.
It is as if Parks was experimenting in this book to get a story told in a different, very fragmented way. In some of his previous books he did so successfully. But I think, here, the experiment is not really satisfying. It is too artificial. And what particularly bothered me is that Mary's perspective is almost completely missing. I gave up after two thirds.
It describes the stormy marriage and growing apart of Thomas and Mary, both middle-aged, with 2 children. Through successive fragments we see how their relationship gradually derails, although they apparently continue to have a very strong bond. “It was a long and complicated relationship, she said. A bit like a Gothic castle, with parts that are still liveable and parts that crumbled to ruin ages ago, and very likely parts with skeletons in every cupboard, and for sure a ghost or two in the cellars or the attic. Not to mention the secret passages! And the rats behind the tapestries!”
The book has a kind of vignette structure, with regularly different narrative perspectives and a different focus. Thomas's psychological household in particular is thus exposed, and it is not an attractive one (he has a bunch of mistresses), although Parks also explains why that is (his special relationship with his distant mother, for example). And, however unlikely, after a while you get a certain sympathy with him.
It is as if Parks was experimenting in this book to get a story told in a different, very fragmented way. In some of his previous books he did so successfully. But I think, here, the experiment is not really satisfying. It is too artificial. And what particularly bothered me is that Mary's perspective is almost completely missing. I gave up after two thirds.
March 24, 2017
A beautifully realised portrait of a long marriage. Loved it.
April 11, 2016
I appreciated the repetitive style and mundaneness this book is written with as it reflects the way a relationship can grow stale and age. I just wish it had more appeal. It wasn't a particularly fun or exciting read and it certainly wasn't a page turner. Some chapters were pointless and it seemed pointless as a story. The title 'Thomas and Mary' is quite true but Mary does seem to get the rough end of the deal throughout and you never can quite connect with her as a character.
April 14, 2016
The forensic examination of the small pleasures and irritations that make up a shared life provides the humour of this novel, the struggle to commit to either the marriage or separation its poignancy.
Full review http://annegoodwin.weebly.com/1/post/...
Full review http://annegoodwin.weebly.com/1/post/...
March 14, 2017
Interesting but rather confusing story of a marriage.
February 2, 2016
Usually when I read a book I don’t think much about the author’s personal life. Sure, an author has to invest some of themselves in what they write but unless it’s a memoir I don’t dwell on the extent of that investment. And then I read Thomas and Mary by Tim Parks. And I can’t stop thinking about the state of Tim Parks’s personal life. Specifically, I’m thinking he’s either been through a bitter divorce; paying child support for the next one thousand years; and/or has had affairs left, right and centre. I’m wondering because Thomas is such an intimately drawn character.
Of course, I could be wrong and the reality is that Tim Parks has an exceedingly good imagination.
The subtitle of Thomas and Mary is ‘A Love Story’ but there’s not a lot of love in this story. It’s largely told from Thomas’s point of view, and describes the slow disintegration of his marriage. It’s in describing the mundane – from Thomas and Mary’s differing bedtimes and whose responsibility it is to look after the indoor plants, to their failure to agree on music – that you realise that it’s these details that are as much to blame as Thomas’s affairs and Mary’s devotion to her dog.
“So as not to have to pretend to be asleep again, which he finds painful, he goes to bed early. Mary joins him at 11:30 and hardly cares whether he is asleep or not, since she has nothing to say to a man who she believes is having an affair.”
There’s a repetitiveness and flatness to Parks’s writing that suits this story (I haven’t read anything else by Parks so can’t say whether it’s his usual style) – bland details about tennis matches, walking the dog and care arrangements for Thomas’s mother blend seamlessly with Thomas’s philandering, their son’s confidence crisis and Mary’s volunteering stint in Africa. It’s an interesting way to show that the cumulative effect of small events can be just as damaging, if not more, than a single catastrophe.
“Smiles through cataracts and a healthier diet. A yearly pact to rearrange the photographs. Why wasn’t that our destiny? Thomas wonders. Thomas wonders how to deal with a past of erosion and unravelling.”
Chapters of this book have been published as stand-alone short stories. Although it reads as vignettes, it is cohesive. I like this style however I didn’t enjoy the story being told from so many different points-of-view – some didn’t work (in particular, the chapters from Thomas’s father and uncle).
3/5 I admired the style. I didn’t admire Thomas.
I received my copy of Thomas and Mary from the publisher, Random House UK, via NetGalley, in exchange for an honest review.
Of course, I could be wrong and the reality is that Tim Parks has an exceedingly good imagination.
The subtitle of Thomas and Mary is ‘A Love Story’ but there’s not a lot of love in this story. It’s largely told from Thomas’s point of view, and describes the slow disintegration of his marriage. It’s in describing the mundane – from Thomas and Mary’s differing bedtimes and whose responsibility it is to look after the indoor plants, to their failure to agree on music – that you realise that it’s these details that are as much to blame as Thomas’s affairs and Mary’s devotion to her dog.
“So as not to have to pretend to be asleep again, which he finds painful, he goes to bed early. Mary joins him at 11:30 and hardly cares whether he is asleep or not, since she has nothing to say to a man who she believes is having an affair.”
There’s a repetitiveness and flatness to Parks’s writing that suits this story (I haven’t read anything else by Parks so can’t say whether it’s his usual style) – bland details about tennis matches, walking the dog and care arrangements for Thomas’s mother blend seamlessly with Thomas’s philandering, their son’s confidence crisis and Mary’s volunteering stint in Africa. It’s an interesting way to show that the cumulative effect of small events can be just as damaging, if not more, than a single catastrophe.
“Smiles through cataracts and a healthier diet. A yearly pact to rearrange the photographs. Why wasn’t that our destiny? Thomas wonders. Thomas wonders how to deal with a past of erosion and unravelling.”
Chapters of this book have been published as stand-alone short stories. Although it reads as vignettes, it is cohesive. I like this style however I didn’t enjoy the story being told from so many different points-of-view – some didn’t work (in particular, the chapters from Thomas’s father and uncle).
3/5 I admired the style. I didn’t admire Thomas.
I received my copy of Thomas and Mary from the publisher, Random House UK, via NetGalley, in exchange for an honest review.
April 11, 2021
British/Italian author Tim Parks is not as well known in the United States as he probably should be. He is a writer of both fiction and non-fiction, much of which takes place in Italy. I've read most of his Italian fiction and thoroughly enjoyed it, particularly the books which feature Morris Duckworth, a British expat in Verona who marries and murders his way up the social and financial ladder. The three books are deeply funny and haunting at the same time.
In 2016, Parks published "Thomas and Mary: A Love Story". It's one of his few books not set in Italy, Thomas and Mary begin the book - and their lives together - in England. They are not a happily married couple, though, perhaps, they could have been if they worked on their marriage. Instead, they share their house with their two children and their dog, Ricky, and a slowly disintegrating sense of intimacy. That intimacy is what fosters love and friendship through a marriage. Thomas does his nurturing with other women and his garden, while Mary gives the dog her love. The book, which is written in short stories or vignettes, moves the couple from their meeting to their divorce. And along with featuring Thomas and Mary, Tim Parks goes afield with his characters and introduces other family members - parents and children - as well as friends of the couple through the years.
"Thomas and Mary" is told mostly from Thomas's point of view. I assume that's because the writer is a man, but it leaves a bit - just a bit - of imbalance in the story. I'd have liked to have known more of Mary's feelings and thoughts. Parks does write with a nuance I rarely see; both husband and wife are drawn with a deft hand. I never felt sorry for either character and no one is a villain or a saint. It's just the story of two people who started out in love, but let that love lapse over the years. It's an old story that Tim Parks tells very, very well.
In 2016, Parks published "Thomas and Mary: A Love Story". It's one of his few books not set in Italy, Thomas and Mary begin the book - and their lives together - in England. They are not a happily married couple, though, perhaps, they could have been if they worked on their marriage. Instead, they share their house with their two children and their dog, Ricky, and a slowly disintegrating sense of intimacy. That intimacy is what fosters love and friendship through a marriage. Thomas does his nurturing with other women and his garden, while Mary gives the dog her love. The book, which is written in short stories or vignettes, moves the couple from their meeting to their divorce. And along with featuring Thomas and Mary, Tim Parks goes afield with his characters and introduces other family members - parents and children - as well as friends of the couple through the years.
"Thomas and Mary" is told mostly from Thomas's point of view. I assume that's because the writer is a man, but it leaves a bit - just a bit - of imbalance in the story. I'd have liked to have known more of Mary's feelings and thoughts. Parks does write with a nuance I rarely see; both husband and wife are drawn with a deft hand. I never felt sorry for either character and no one is a villain or a saint. It's just the story of two people who started out in love, but let that love lapse over the years. It's an old story that Tim Parks tells very, very well.
November 19, 2017
The 'A Love Story' title is clearly tongue-in-cheek here, as this was anything but! It follows Thomas and Mary as their marriage slowly begins to crumble around them. It appears that Thomas and Mary were never really in love to begin with though, so it was hard to empathise with either character or will them on to find happiness.
Despite the fact that most of the book is full of rather mundane detail (presumably to mimic the state of the character's relationship) and it was a little disjointed, I didn't feel like giving up with it and read through to the end, which I have to say, I think I 'got'.
Definitely not a page tuner and I wouldn't advise reading it if you are feeling down, but not one to languish on my 'unable to finish' shelf either.
Despite the fact that most of the book is full of rather mundane detail (presumably to mimic the state of the character's relationship) and it was a little disjointed, I didn't feel like giving up with it and read through to the end, which I have to say, I think I 'got'.
Definitely not a page tuner and I wouldn't advise reading it if you are feeling down, but not one to languish on my 'unable to finish' shelf either.
December 27, 2016
Het verhaal van een zinkend huwelijk, in korte hoofdstukken en vanuit wisselend perspectief verteld. De man Thomas staat centraal, zijn vrouw Mary komt weinig aan bod. Een beetje een onevenwichtig boek: sommige hoofdstukken zijn nogal langdradig en dragen nauwelijks iets bij tot het verhaal. Toch de moeite waard door de hoofdstukken waarin de geërodeerde relatie messcherp wordt geobserveerd aan de hand van alledaagse gebeurtenissen en gewoontes (het verlies van een trouwring, de verschillende bedtijden van Thomas en Mary, de ruimtelijke ordening van de huiselijke woning, ...)
February 27, 2018
I liked the idea of this novel, with a kind of 360 degree look at the breakdown of a marriage, and there were some moments of brilliance and heartbreaking poignancy. But the problem for me was that the constant shifts in character made me lose interest in the main characters themselves, and I found it hard to sympathise with either Thomas or Mary. I also found it odd that everyone BUT Mary seemed to have a voice. Why not give us an insight into her side?
March 7, 2017
Geen vrolijk verhaal over het huwelijk van Thomas en Mary. Knap en gedetailleerd beschreven in de laatste 100 pagina's was ik de weg en interesse kwijt. Daarom (maar) 3 sterren
January 12, 2017
Essentially this book is just so very dull. There’s some good writing hidden amongst all the dullness but it all so unremittingly goes on and on and on……Thomas has been married to Mary for 30 years and things are getting….well, dull. But does the reader really need to accompany Thomas as he wallows in his self-pity? I don’t think so. I found the beginning of the novel quite appealing. Tim Parks is good at analysing the everyday details that make up married life, the avoidances, the resentments, the things left unspoken. And the depiction of their son Mark is pretty convincing, although even here the plot gets a little out of hand. But after about a third of the way through the novel loses focus and just meanders on to very little purpose. Disappointing.
December 27, 2017
Naja, das hatte ich in der deutschen Übersetzung gelesen - präzise erzählt, glatt, nüchtern, hat schon fast etwas seziererisches, wie der Autor diese Ehe zerlegt. Aber eben auch frei von Spannung und Überraschung, dafür verliert er sich etwas im religiös-versteinerten der Eltern von Thomas, wobei nie ganz klar wird, ob seine Erziehung nicht genau das ist, was ihm zu gesellschaftlichem Aufstieg und damit zu der Möglichkeit verholfen hat, sich überhaupt ein Leben mit ständig wechselnden Geliebten leisten zu können. Also, was ist an einer Figur interessant, welche sich ein Leben lang nicht zwischen Familie und Einzelgängertum entscheiden kann? Und Mary - dem Titel nach ist sie ja die zweite Protagonistin, aber treffender wäre ein Titel wie "Thomas, seine Ehefrau und sein sonstiges Leben".
March 1, 2016
This is a particularly strange slant on a love story, as it describes in minute, every day detail, the slow disintegration of a marriage. The style is very repetitive and bland (possibly to emphasise the state of Thomas and Mary's relationship) so I found it extremely hard to engage with the characters and the storyline and for me this was a very disappointing, unfullfilling read.
November 18, 2016
I love Tim Parks' books, yet I couldn't get through this one. I got so tired of the main character and him being grumpy. I really wanted to keep going, but ultimately decided to give up. There are so many good books to read and, as a close friend of mine said 'life's too short to read mediocre stuff'
December 17, 2018
The story of a marriage and its breakdown. It started off well but just seemed to get a bit confusing at times and veer off the subject. There were some funny moments in the book that made me stick with it.
July 1, 2019
Gave up half way. Thomas is a very unlikeable character and story is mooving too slow. I am half way and nothing much has happened. Keep getting introduced characters and only half way through chapter get to know how they relate to story.
October 6, 2019
Het boek heeft een veelbelovende start, maar gaandeweg het verhaal verloor ik mijn interesse volledig. Te langdradig, weinig ontwikkeling in het hele verhaal. Ik voelde geen sympathie met de karakters.
October 12, 2016
What a spineless, pitiful, unlikeable character Thomas is.
September 17, 2017
Started off really well and then lost itself a bit with confusing narrative voices. I thought some of the observations were a bit glib.
July 16, 2018
I liked this. A story of a man trying to work out who he is and what he wants. Sad in tone, but good.
December 19, 2019
Boeide me niet echt
April 22, 2020
Maybe if I’d read this at another time I might have enjoyed it more, but as it is, I just found it a bit sad and depressing. Thomas and Mary are pretty normal, every day kind of people. I did have to wonder if they were ever truly in love in the first place. I understand what the author was trying to achieve, and I think they succeeded. Realistic to many, I’m sure. But maybe the title did the book a disservice as I went into it expecting one thing, but received something altogether different, Well written, just not the beautifully told love story I was hoping for.
August 18, 2024
This was a good story about how some humans think the grass is always greener and struggle to be happy. Both characters were quite unlikable but Thomas was worse. Thomas constantly questioned where his marriage went wrong and if he should go back but he spent the whole of it cheating. The story takes us back and forwards along the timeline of their marriage and others viewpoint are included which I liked and found interesting. I did get confused a couple of times,Mary gave the dog away then he was there then he wasn’t.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
July 18, 2022
I almost didn’t read this because it had so many critical reviews, but I thoroughly enjoyed this dissection of a marriage and family life. I got a bit confused at first by the various narrators but once I had that sorted it was an interesting and engaging read.
March 27, 2020
A wry, ironic look at a middle aged married couple and their relationship.
August 21, 2021
I found this book to be very disjointed and at times boring. I didn’t care for Thomas, and his wife Mary was better off without him. I doubt Thomas would ever be completely happy.
April 10, 2021
Ik las dit graag. Tim Parks vertelt dit triest verhaal -het huwelijk van Thomas & Mary dat uiteenvalt- op een interessante manier, met nauwkeurige observaties van hoe levens uiteendrijven door routine, de verborgen gedachten van elke partner, hoe huwelijken voortgezet worden door eeuwig twijfelen, hoe altijd maar uitgesteld wordt om de knoop door te hakken. Hoe ze uiteenvallen zonder aanwijsbare grote problemen ook, alsof het willekeurig is - een droeve conclusie...
Ik snap best dat Thomas niet meer goed weet waar hij naartoe moet met zijn leven, maar de schrijver weet het de laatste 100 pagina's van het boek ook niet goed meer, hij laat het wat verpieteren zoals Thomas zijn huwelijk. Anders had ik de roman 4 sterren gegeven.
Ik snap best dat Thomas niet meer goed weet waar hij naartoe moet met zijn leven, maar de schrijver weet het de laatste 100 pagina's van het boek ook niet goed meer, hij laat het wat verpieteren zoals Thomas zijn huwelijk. Anders had ik de roman 4 sterren gegeven.
November 23, 2016
one of the worst books I've read in ages started off alright and it made me laugh a couple of times then it just became very uninteresting I ended up skipping most of it and having finally got to the end it wasn't worth it It also dodgedabout before in time which made it hard to follow completely pointless book
Displaying 1 - 30 of 34 reviews