Feeding My Mother: Comfort and Laughter in the Kitchen as My Mom Lives with Memory Loss

by Jann Arden

#1 NATIONAL BESTSELLER

Based on her hugely popular Facebook posts and Instagram photos, Feeding My Mother is a frank, funny, inspirational and piercingly honest account of the transformation in Jann Arden's life that has turned her into the primary "parent" to her mom, who is in the grip of Alzheimer's.

Jann Arden moved in to a house just across the way from her parents in rural Alberta to be close to them but also so they could be her refuge from the demands of the music business and a performing career. Funny how time  works. Since her dad died in 2015, Jann cooks for her mom five or six times a week. Her mom finds comfort in her daughter's kitchen, not just in the delicious food but also just sitting with her as she cooks. And Jann finds some peace in caring for her mom, even as her mom slowly becomes a stranger. "If you told me two years ago that I'd be here," Jann writes, "I wouldn't have believed it. And yet we still fall into so much laughter, feel so much insane gladness and joy. It's such a contrast from one minute to the next and it teaches me it makes me stronger and more humble and more empathetic and caring and kind."    
     The many people who are dealing with a loved one who is losing it will find inspiration and strength in Jann's wholehearted, loving response and her totally Jann take on the upside-down world of a daughter mothering her mother. Feeding My Mother is one heck of an affirmation that life just keeps on keeping on, and a wonderful example of how you have to roll with it.

Genres: Nonfiction, Memoir, Canada, Biography, Audiobook, Book Club, Biography Memoir

224 pages, Hardcover

First published November 21, 2017

About the author

Jann Arden is a Canadian born, singer, songwriter, broadcaster and author. The much-celebrated multi-platinum award-winning artist catapulted onto the Canadian music scene in 1993 with the release of her debut album “Time For Mercy” featuring the hit single, “I Would Die For You”. A year later with “Living Under June”, she would have her career breakout hit, “Insensitive” that would solidify her position in the music world.

On April 2nd, 2019 Arden released the paperback version of the Canadian best seller “Feeding My Mother – Comfort and Laughter in the Kitchen as My Mom Lives with Memory Loss” (Penguin Random House Canada). The book shares insights, loss, irony, and yes humour, as mother and daughter face the journey together. The hardcover book spent 21 consecutive weeks on the Globe & Mail bestseller lists.

Whether she is captivating audiences with her heartfelt music, entertaining them with her quick wit or sharing her written word in a boldly honest voice – Jann Arden is a Canadian original – a brilliant multi-dimensional talent!

Reviews

[Elyse Walters · Rating 5 out of 5]

Jann Arden, is a Canadian singer songwriter and actress. (from Calgary, Alberta), where our younger daughter and her husband live.
Many thanks, to my friend, Joanne, who recommended I read Jann Arden’s books.
I tore through this book in a couple of hours….
I then downloaded Arden’s music ….added it to my Apple-playlist shelf…..(loving her songs)….
Then purchased another Jann Arden book to read. 📕

Arden is famous for her signature ballads,”Could I Be Your Girl” and “Insensitive”…. ‘great songs’ 🎶

When Jann’s mother was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s, she became the primary caretaker.
“If you told me two years ago that I’d be here, Jann wouldn’t have believed it. And yet we still fall into so much laughter, feel so much insane gladness and joy. It’s such a contrast from one minute to the next and it teaches me constantly: it makes me stronger and more humble and more empathetic and caring and kind”.

“Every thought in my head has hundred layers. Layers upon layer of pain and confusion and disbelief. It’s like the world decided to test how much chaos it could inject into my heart without it stopping. And my heart keeps going. The blood whirls around inside my chest like a tsunami, gathering up every memory and pushing them all out my tear ducks. I try to keep myself from crying and I don’t know why. It actually, physically, hurts my jaw ‘not’ to cry. I don’t know why it’s my jaw that hurt—that’s just where the pain ends up”.

“What month is it?”
“It’s May, she says matter-of-factly”.
“It’s actually February”.
“Good God, you mean we have ‘more’ winter coming?”
“I’m afraid we do”.
“Well, that’s terrible”.
“Tell me about it”.

The stories (even recipes) are about how Jann managed.
Jann learned….
“that no matter what came, she had to wrap herself in all the goodness she could possibly muster because that’s what her Mom had to do every single day”.

“I remember once, when she was deep in the grip of dementia but still able to live at home, we were driving into town to buy a few groceries, she told me that she was eighty per cent happy. Eighty per cent, Mom? Well, that’s way better than me!”
“She told me that I would have to work on that. . . “

A list of a few things Jann thought she and her Mom might need…..
….a comedian
….an award-winning food network chef
….a full-time housekeeper
….a butler
….a chauffeur
….a pharmacist
….a team of nurses
….one of those Electric hospital beds
….a soft-serve ice cream machine
….a gardener
….a drug dealer for my mother and myself.

“Apparently the government will provide us with three hours a week of in-home help for some sort of free. What a load off of our shoulders”.

This was a beautiful intimate- [diary style entries] - book.
Her mother’s illness was BIG. When you lose someone you love an inch at a time, grief hangs over every hour of your life.

The effects of Alzheimer’s disease can be completely overwhelming for family members and the caretakers.
I have several friends who lost their Mum or Mom or Husband….[they know who they are]…. I love these friends - and extend my love and how sorry I am that lived this first handedly.

Jann Arden wrote this book with humility, sadness, fear, pain, and humor.

[Len · Rating 5 out of 5]

When I was younger, I wrote a very long, heartfelt letter to Jann Arden about what "Good Mother" meant to me, and dropped it into the mailbox, not thinking a celebrity letter would ever get me a reply. In short order, I received back a signed copy of the CD single of Good Mother, with a warm message written on it.
This book has now done for me what that CD did so many years ago. It opened me up, dragged the darkness out into the light and helped me to heal. Losing my father last year to pneumonia (as did Jann), the love, strength and hope that are at the centre of this beautiful memoir have been a balm to me.
This is fearless, gut-wrenching and filled to the brim and over with true love, generosity, compassion and understanding. What could have been only sad, frustrating and bitter becomes, instead - through Jann's pen - a story of survival (of all involved), of perseverance, and of facing the darkness head-on.
Though the entire book was a beautiful example of why we read, Chapter 14 touched me deepest, and moved me in a way that no other book has this year, or perhaps in a very long time.
Thank you - again - Jann!

[Carole · Rating 5 out of 5]

Feeding My Mother: Comfort and Laughter in the Kitchen as My Mom Lives with Memory Loss by Jann Arden is a small book of laughter, sadness, tears, hope and most of all, love. It is an absolute delight to read and provides the reader with a glimpse into the lives of people living with memory loss and the people caring for them. This is about a daughter’s devotion. I also enjoyed listening to Jann
Arden reading the book. Her voice breathes life into her words. You will be laughing with her and you will be crying. This mother-daughter relationship will stay in my memory for a long time. Highly recommended.

[Janice · Rating 5 out of 5]

Such a beautiful read and as in typical Jann Arden style she makes you laugh, cry, laugh and cry again! Her story resonated so deeply with me as I learn to come to terms with my own mother's recent diagnosis (although dealing with issues for sometime). There were so many moments over the last two years when I felt alone, afraid and totally unprepared but after reading this book I realized, nobody is ever prepared and "it's the hardships and the sadness that show us the beauty of joy and happiness. You can't have one without the other". Thanks Jann for reminding us that we all have to work with this disease and our loved ones with grace, courage, compassion and empathy, and that isn't always easy.
Beautiful book, recipes and pictures, a wonderful gift ❤

[Laurie • The Baking Bookworm · Rating 5 out of 5]

Disclaimer: This book was generously provided by the publisher in exchange for my honest review.

When I think of Jann Arden I think of one of my favourite singer/songwriters who also has an awesome sense of humour. She seems like a regular Canadian gal who just happens to have a cool job. I have enjoyed seeing her perform live twice, currently have her Christmas album on repeat and continue to be entertained by her funny tidbits on social media.

As a songwriter Jann is used to sharing her feelings but this time she makes it even more personal. With this memoir/cookbook, she takes us into her home and opens up about her relationship with her parents, especially her mother as she struggles with Alzheimer's. Jann is candid about her feelings and anyone who has had a loved one with Alzheimer's will empathize with Jann's feelings of helplessness, frustration, fear and sadness. But Jann (and her mother) also show their unrelenting spirit to persevere and find love and laughs in even the smallest of moments. Hopefully readers who have experienced Alzheimer's in their families will find a sense of healing, validation and comfort reading this book. But it is equally important for those not yet touched by dementia/Alzheimer's as it gives a candid look at how this disease encompasses the entire family.

Feeding My Mother is a touching and inspiring read that chronicles the Arden family's journey with Alzheimer's. Along with some of her favourite recipes, this book is filled with hope and the importance of perseverance and is told with heart, honesty and her signature Canadian humour.

[Nikki Stafford · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is a beautifully written, open, and honest account of Jann Arden's story of being with her parents through their diagnoses of dementia, her father's stroke, and her mother's diagnosis of Alzheimer's. As someone going through some of these things with my parents right now, there were times I felt sobs catch in my throat as she explained how much you have to keep your sense of humour through all of this (yes!) and how you have to try to find the joy in the little moments with them, and try to brush off the pain and heartbreak when the disease takes over and they say or do things they don't mean, but which hurt terribly. She includes some recipes in there that she began using to feed her parents, and they seem very easy and delicious. I'm definitely going to try some of them. I'm thankful for this book for feeling less alone in all of this.

[Laura · Rating 5 out of 5]

My grandmother, who lived to be 99, or so, started going downhill in her 90s. She was sharp as a tack, up until then. She drove a truck. She ran a small farm. She painted, and played cards, and made friends wherever she went. But, when she started to go down hill, she was put in a "home", by my aunt.

My mother hated that. She resented that, and said she never wanted to be put in a home, ever. So, we agreed to let her live with us, after she suffered a series of strokes. She can still mostly get around, and we sent her off to senior classes during the day, to keep her busy, otherwise she will just sleep. She has not been diagnosed with dementia or alzheimers, yet, but I feel it will come to that, soon.

I bring this up, because Jann could be writing about my mother. Reading this book, reminds me of the things my mother has said, though her memory loss isn't quite as bad as Jann's mom. I could so relate to everything thing in this book, could so sympathize with Jann, and what she was going through.

And the quotes she brings up are great. I have written down my mother's best ones, but not often enough to make a book like this one.

I have so many favorites, it is hard to pick the best, but here is a timely one. THey are discussing the state of the world.

"You have to keep going no matter what," she says as she looks out the window at two squirrels racing up a tree."He should spend a few hours every day watching squirrels–that would help him."

I think she is talking about Trump and that makes me kind of snort.

"You never know, Mom. That might help him."

And then she says, "Well, they must have squirrels on the planet he comes from."

Although there are recipes, don't pick up the book for that. Pick it up for the humor, and stay for the philosophy.

You can read my more complete review on this book at my website,Reading for you.

[Leah · Rating 3 out of 5]

3.5***
I listened to this on audio and enjoyed hearing Jann read it. It’s a bit of a smorgasbord with some spirituality, a bit of self help and a crash course in Alzheimer’s/Dementia. It was a cruel fate for both her parents to have a form of each disease but she was really there for them. This book is about her coming to terms with their illnesses and how what she has learned from them. Difficult to rate as I love her music and personality, but if anyone else had written this, I don’t think I would have rated it 3.5 stars, likely less. I do think she’s written a beautiful memoir that is ultimately a gift to herself.

[Ashley Glovasky · Rating 3 out of 5]

In a nutshell: Jann Arden, Canadian singer and lyricist, watches over and cooks for her parents, both suffering from Alzheimer's.

Recommendation: This wasn't what I was expecting... Personally, I'm not sure.

While it was heartwarming to read about Jann and her parents, I was not expecting this to be mostly a cookbook. I'd like to try out some of the recipes even though they seem simple and are scattered throughout the book.

Jann keeps a diary and she wrote in it while she came to terms with her parents' Alzheimers. Jann, although loving and patient, finds it hard to deal with her parents losing their memories. And the best medicine seems to be cooking. She lives in a house just across the street, so she can look out for them.

I was not expecting this to be a cook book. I thought it would just be about her and her mom. But you know what it reminds me of? There is a meme going around with someone telling a person sharing a recipe that they don't care that their husband usually doesn't like guacamole and they don't appreciate the essays about their kid's hating vegetables, just get to the recipe! That's what this was. Storytelling through cooking. Some of it worked, some of it didn't. Frankly I'm unsure how I feel.

As well, this book is called feeding her mother, but for half of the book, her father is there as well. And some of it is funny, but most of it is very sad and really shares what it's like to take care of someone with Alzheimer's.

But... this book comes from a vulnerable place and I'm sure Jann found this situation very difficult and heartbreaking, so I can't fault her too much.

[Lorraine · Rating 3 out of 5]

A sad but quick read through Jann Arden's diary of dealing with her parents' dementia. Her mother stays positive and never forgets Jann's name (even if she doesn't always know their relationship) which is more fortunate than most. It's a good reminder to enjoy the good times, and it's a raw look into the difficulty and mind-twistedness of dealing with a parent who slowly or quickly becomes someone else. How do you reconcile the mother you knew with the woman in front of you who looks like your mother but does not act like the mother you knew, someone who is a stranger with no past or future, only a present? Such a conundrum.
I wonder, though, if this book would have been published had Jann Arden not been a famous artist with a big fan base. There are a lot of books out there by people whose parents have dealt with Alzheimers, and this one isn't that unique or particularly insightful in any new way. I'm just wondering.

[Carla · Rating 5 out of 5]

What a beautiful book. Ms. Arden, musician, moves closer to her parents to take care of them as they age. Her Mother is now with Alzheimer's disease and provides daily reminders of how the roles are now reversed. She uses humour, wonderful recipes, drawings, to tell of both their journey's. With kindness, love, and a strengthening of empathy, Ms. Arden has shown us what hard work care giving can be, but that it is more than duty that one does it. While I enjoyed it tremendously, I'm sure people in similar circumstances right now would feel a sense of camaraderie by reading this book. May we all have such a lovely caregiver.

[Wisewebwoman · Rating 5 out of 5]

A gorgeous heartfelt read with many funny moments in what is a very painful recounting of Jann's role as carer for both of her parents, each with dementia.

The honesty is breathtaking as she recounts her younger angry alkie father and how it stirred music in her alone in the basement of her childhood home.

Snippets:
"Tears are God's lubricants to get you through the tough spots."

"We only die on one day, the rest of the days we live."

Interspersed with recipes and beautiful photos, this is a book to treasure and re-read.

5/5

[Heather · Rating 5 out of 5]

One word for this book: Wow (as Jann's late-mother puts it, "Wow" is "Mom" written upside down).

I knew about Jann Arden the singer-song writer, but I did not know about Jann Arden the author until now. Jann Arden is an incredibly eloquent, fearless writer who doesn't shy away from showing her vulnerability and insecurity to her readers. I admire her honesty and optimism in the face of this incurable Alzheimer's disease that plagued her parents. It cannot be easy.

"All you can do is your best. And also don't forget about love. Mom never did. So make sure you love as hard as you can." (p. 161)

After reading this last sentence in this emotionally charged book, I had to get up and hug my grandmother and my parents tight. Oh man, this book really hit close to home, rendering my heart helpless, yet hopeful. My 88 year old grandmother was diagnosed with (early stage) dementia a few years ago, and some of the things that Jann went through with her folks in the book was very relate-able: Depends run; Repeating the same question over and over; Constantly stashing away money/wallet then blaming someone for stealing it; Being unable to understand what is going on no matter how many times it's been explained; Out-of-character habits, etc. It is comforting to know that I am not alone in dealing with all this.

Alzheimer's scares me. It totally rips apart my belief about the purpose of life: That it is a learning experience and we accumulate our new found wisdom to take with us into the next life. But if Alzheimer's steals people's memories in the end, then what is the purpose for us to keep learning and continue living? What is the point if we fail to even remember who we are in the end? This question always haunts me whenever I look at my grandmother. Jann also "wonder where those lost memories go." But the following sentence gives hope:

I want to believe there is a celestial Cloud, hanging like a fly strip in God's porch, collecting every single thing we have ever done or said or thought or seen or heard or tasted. It's all there, stuck to that strip for eternity. We never lose it. It's saved forever. We are "saved."

It's a comforting sentiment in the face of the unknown.

In the end, all we can do is find the humor in the situation and the strength to overcome it. Jann said it so well here:

"Humour is ALL.
Laugh at all the heartache.
Laugh at all the pain.
Laugh at all the silly things you thought you did in vain.
Laugh at all the guilt.
Laugh at all the wrong.
Laugh until you can't be anything but true and strong."(p.79)

This book is a treasure. I highly recommend it.

[❀ Susan · Rating 4 out of 5]

https://ayearofbooksblog.com/2018/02/...

“I can’t imagine how maddening it must be for her. I mean, I get so anxious I feel like crying most of the time. The disease is taking me over too, even with the help I have. None of that changes the fact that I am losing my mom, an inch, a thought, a memory at a time”.

Feeding my Mother: Comfort and Laughter in the Kitchen As My Mom Lives with Memory Loss is a very heart-felt, well-written memoir with the added bonus of a few comfort food recipes. Written in a journal style, it is honest, emotionally charged and highlights both the struggles and appreciation experienced by Canadian singer-songwriter, Jann Arden.

Fans may appreciate Arden’s music and have no idea of the challenges she has experienced. They may not know that her older brother was in prison for murder, that her father was an alcoholic and that her mother held everything together. They might not know that she chose to live across the street from her parents, checking in on them and cooking for them. They might not know how difficult it was to place her dad in long-term care and to have help at home to care for her mother as her dementia exacerbated. They also might not realize her tenacity as she struggled to balance her family responsibilities with her music career. The memoir is eye-opening and provides readers with a new perspective on Arden’s life.

The few recipes are simple and made with common ingredients that readers likely have in their homes. This is appreciated by readers who can easily decided to try to replicate a dish. I read this book for a Canadian BINGO reading challenge for the CanadianContent Goodreads group. The square was to read a cook book AND cook or bake one of the recipes. I have read the book and am contemplating which recipe that I will make – I will post a picture later!

Working in healthcare for over 2 decades, I have met many patients diagnosed with dementia and families struggling with their role of caregivers. It can be heartbreaking, frustrating, exhausting and rewarding and this memoir puts a face to those challenges.

Feeding My Mother would be helpful for other families to read. There is no instruction manual for dealing with dementia but this book will remind them that they are no alone. Arden has done a great job of sharing her experience in an open, honest and at times, humorous way.

[Ann-Margret Hovsepian · Rating 5 out of 5]

If I could give this book ten stars, I would. I will confess that, although I'm a Canadian born in the early 70s, I am not really familiar with Arden's music, a deficiency I intend to remedy because, after reading this book, there is no doubt in my mind that she is a spectacular writer. I need to go through this book again and highlight or copy down the many, many, many precious nuggets of wisdom and encouragement woven through the raw and honest accounts of coping with the challenges that come with having aging parents.

My mother is at some unmeasurable stage of dementia stealing her memories and sense so I could relate to most of what Arden shares in this memoir. Or, rather, I felt like she would be able to relate to my situation. The fear, the guilt, the grief. . . it's so real for so many of us. Also, being single and childless like Arden, and being an artist and writer in my own genres, her words were all the more meaningful for me.

I should have been weeping as I read this book, but I held back. Perhaps when I read it again, I'll let myself feel my feelings.

I don't know whether you'll ever see this review but thank you, Miss Arden, for writing this book. (I already tried your chicken noodle soup recipe, by the way, and look forward to trying some of the others.) You have given us a gift and I pray that God will bless you with serenity and strength and the assurance of His love for you. Thank you again. ❤

[Teena in Toronto · Rating 4 out of 5]

Jann Arden is Canadian singer, songwriter, broadcaster, actor and author. She lived next door to her parents in rural Alberta. Her father, Derrel, passed away in August 2015 after years of being ill, including dementia. Her mother, Joan, still lives next door. She is battling Alzheimer's and needs round-the-clock care.

This book is Jann's journey of taking care of her parents and watching them decline over the last eight years but being helpless to do anything about it. She started cooking for them (there were days when they couldn't remember how use a can opener) and throughout the book are recipes of some of things she's made ... like turkey chili, chicken parm, split pea soup and pulled chicken noodle soup. Also scattered throughout the book are pictures of Jann, her parents and their pets.

This is the second book of Jann's I've read (I read Falling Backwards a couple years ago and enjoyed it). Despite the difficult subject, I enjoyed this book and Jann's personality comes through and I felt like she was sitting with me and chatting. I liked the writing style ... it was amusing at times and honest.

Blog review post: http://www.teenaintoronto.com/2018/02...

[Melissa McIsaac · Rating 5 out of 5]

Feeding My Mother - Jann Arden
@jannarden #feedingmymother

I have never read a book that hit home like this one does. I’m not someone to keep a journal but I practically felt like this was my journal. Like Jann was in my head and writing it all down. Her journey of her Dads passing and her moms Alzheimer’s is a mix between our families story of Grandmas passing, Grannies passing and Grandpa. It oddly gave me a sense of relief to hear that we were not and ARE NOT alone in all of this. We will be dealing with all of it for a long time. Time makes it easier but never makes it go away or makes you forget. The pain is always still there. Asking for help and talking about your emotions, yours struggles and your pain is necessary.

I could have chosen many pages to talk about because they all are so real but this one got me good.
Page 104- (photo)

❤️👏 amazing! Jann Arden fan for life! 💓 11/10 Over the top amazing read! #alzheimers

[Lester · Rating 5 out of 5]

THANK YOU JANN ARDEN!!!
I miss my Mamma every day. We looked after her for her last year..and there were/are no regrets. It was every emotion possible, all over the map.
If we live long enough..we do become parents to our parents..or..parents to our siblings!! (actually..I accidentally typed 'diblings' there first!!..and that suits my family better!)
Yes..you sharing your family life has shown so many people that..this life is normal..live each day and night..laugh and cry..and laugh again.

Also..this book is so beautiful looking..it made me happy every time I looked at it..loved the photos and the recipes too. Thank you Jann. One day you will visit the Yukon Territory and come to do a book reading..maybe at our tiny library..eat at our table and laugh and love.

[Mala Ashok · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is perhaps the most poignant book I have read in a long time. Jann Arden has shared the story of her parenting her parents when they become dependent on her. What defines the book is not the grief and despair rather it is the humour with which Jann's mother, and consequently Jann herself, handle the situation. This is an upside down world where Jann takes on the role of mothering her mother and she does it with humour and food. I loved the recipes Jann has shared and i could relate to every story Jann told of her parents. When Jann points out that MOM is WOW upside down I nearly cried. As Baby Boomers entering the stage where we become caregivers to our parents, this book is sure to have a huge following. A real keeper.

[Colleen · Rating 5 out of 5]

Singer/songwriter/comedienne Jann Arden is also a daughter who is helping her mother through the last stages of her life with Alzheimer’s. Jann’s account of life with her mom is heartbreaking, but is also interspersed with humourous and inspirational moments that are so completely honest, you feel like you’re right there with her. Jann pulls no punches in describing her new norm, but let’s face it: it’s Jann Arden. We wouldn’t expect anything less. I love Jann and my respect for her has only deepened after reading this book. This is a must-read for anyone with a family member who is going through a similar experience.

[Stephanie · Rating 4 out of 5]

I really enjoyed this, and it was eye-opening for me. My mother had read it, as she is wife/caregiver to my dad, who has Alzheimer's. For me, it was less about the Alzheimer's, as that is familiar enough, and more about how Jann responds to being an adult child caring for her aging parents. I have liked her for a while, just in little visits to tv talk shows etc, I'm not sure where I would have seen her, I don't particularly listen to her music, but I feel like she's a Canadian who's always been in the background for me. But now, I really like her--she's hilarious! And humble. And I may seek other books by her :)

[Pat C · Rating 5 out of 5]

After seeing Jann in concert in January if 2014 I began following her on Facebook. As a result I had previously read many of the diary entries Jann had made and was knowledgable about her relationship with her parents. This love story is beautiful and heartwrenching, heart warming and inspiring as she chronicles her life with her mother after she is diagnosed with Alzheimer's. The journey is difficult for Jann as she navigates the changes the relationship with her mother undergoes as the disease progresses but she manages to inject humour and love into the telling of her story. A wonderful read.

[Jennifer · Rating 5 out of 5]

What a gifted writer! Jann’s experiences of living with the incremental, depressing, slow, painful loss of her mother are expressed with honesty and gratitude. There are many lessons there, for all of us. Having lived through a similar experience of being caregiver to my mother inflicted with the same dreaded disease, I only wish I had been able to demonstrate the grace and even joy that Jann expresses in this lovely book.
Loved this book, will share it with many - but always keep the book for myself. I know I will find peace in rereading it

[Katie · Rating 4 out of 5]

A beautiful tribute to her mother, and heartbreaking look into what it’s like to be the caretaker to elderly parents. Watching her mother crumble under the Alzheimer’s disease really makes you think about the love and care needed to give ones own family. Topics of grief, love, laughter, it touched all the senses. Not to mention the gorgeous photos. Wonderful, touching tribute. I would recommend if you know anyone who is struggling with a Dementia or Alzheimer’s diagnosis (the family member that is, sadly these diagnoses chip away at the person your loved one used to be).

[Robyn · Rating 3 out of 5]

3.5 stars really, but rounded down for being slightly repetitive. I feel bad about it as I really do like Jann, but there you have it.

This would be interesting to read back-to-back with Roz Chast's book Can't We Talk About Something More Pleasant (I may have that title slightly wrong)

[Tracy · Rating 4 out of 5]

I liked this book way more than I expected to. I found I even took screenshots of several of the passages, because they hit home for me. It’s written in a series of blog posts, and includes lots of personal pictures.

[Andrea · Rating 5 out of 5]

One of my favourite books of 2019. Jann captures beautifully the feelings we all experience in dealing with aging parents and the final days of our journeys with them. Her writing shows that this is a universal experience and it is one we don’t talk about often enough.

[Cori · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book was so honest and vulnerable. As someone who lived on the periphery as my grandmother went through Alzheimer's, I felt like this gave me a better grasp of what my mom was dealing with. I laughed, I teared up. I really enjoyed this glimpse into such a fraught time.

[Joanne MacNevin · Rating 4 out of 5]

Beautifully written. Heart-breaking, but beautiful. Some passages had me tearing up, some had me laughing. And many made me remember certain days with my grandmother. A really great book.

[Terri L · Rating 5 out of 5]

Anyone who has a parent, loved one, friend ... with Alzheimer’s or dementia should read this book. It’s comforting and real. ❤️