Aging: An Apprenticeship

by Nan Narboe

Nan Narboe's 56 thoughtfully selected essays offer an intimate and lyrical account of aging through the decades.

Authors Judy Blume, Andrew McCarthy, Gloria Steinem, Donald Hall, David Shields, Julie Gray, Ursula K. Le Guin and others draw from their own experiences, describing a specific decade’s losses and gains to form a complex and unflinching portrait of the years from nearing fifty to ninety and beyond.

In six sections, these detail-rich essays paint an accessible picture of nearing 50, the 50s, 60s, 70s, 80s, the 90s and beyond with equal parts humor and insight.

Drawing on seven decades worth of experiences, the selected essays offer a clear-eyed composition of narratives, each narrative as important as the one before it. In Paul Casey's "Katie Couric Is No Friend of Mine," a colonoscopy, not a red convertible, marks his initiation into mid-life. Germaine Koh, in "Thoughts on Aging," is the oldest player in her roller derby league, confounded by her changing body. Ursula K. Le Guin’s "Dogs, Cats, and Thoughts about Beauty” meditates on human self-consciousness—it is aging humans who find their bodies surprising. And in "Death," Donald Hall rejects he’s not going to “pass away;” he’s going to die.

Genres: Essays, Nonfiction, Memoir

355 pages, Kindle Edition

Published April 4, 2017

Reviews

[Ralph Moore · Rating 5 out of 5]

A fascinating compilation of personal essays from over 50 individuals on how they feel about, and are affected by, the aging process at 50, 60, 70, 80, 90 and older. Part of the pleasure of reading Aging is experiencing the wide diversity of voices discussing the issue of aging and the adjustments it requires; the collection reminds me in many ways of the classic Studs Terkel compilations. Well worth reading.

[Claire · Rating 4 out of 5]

Essays are best read slowly, one here and one there. So it took a while. The essays are arranged by the ages of the authors when they wrote them, so I plunged in at my age and read to the end first. Later I came back to the ones before 70. I'll admit to having more interest in the 70-90 and beyond batch.

I ended up with two favorites: William Zinsser's "The Overtone Years" and Mark Greene's "Passing Fifty." (Yes, one of my favorites came from the younger set.) The two resonate with each other. In "Passing Fifty," Greene mourns the young self he is losing and looks forward to the older self he is becoming, saying, "These two selves . . .will either be adversaries or partners. I feel my job is to teach them to be friends before it is too late" (75). And Zinsser's metaphor showed a way for the two to relate: all the joys of the younger self forming overtones to the life of the older self.

I had expected all the essays to be by people pondering their experiences of their own age, and was disappointed when some narrated the experiences of others at ages other than that of their section. I pondered rearranging the essays by age discussed in contents rather than of author. It would have worked for all except those written about various people at various ages. There were many essays that pondered death, and I pondered them grouped together. Otherwise, grouping by the age of the writer worked well.

There is a wide variety of approaches: personal narrative, humor, philosophical, and historical. Several address sexism and ageism, also important issues. I felt that the apparatus of asking What age are you? What age do you feel? tended to prompt ageism, the feeling younger than I am sort where young is good and old is not (instead of This is one way 80 (etc.) can feel. I was delighted to see many writers wiggling out of that trap.

And now the ritual disclaimer: I was given a copy to review; my opinions have not been influenced by the gift other than to read each essay. Otherwise I might have skipped over a couple.

[Martha · Rating 4 out of 5]

I checked out this book because I wanted to read a certain essay by Hilary Mantel which it contains, but ended up reading the whole book. All the essays are by established and thoughtful writers, and the writing is good; what's more, this book gives us so many interesting and varied ruminations on the human occupation in which we are all engaged (though some more consciously than others): getting older.

[Carolyn LePage · Rating 5 out of 5]

Very unified. Each chapter offered a personal perspective on age. Some seemed shallow but most echoed perspectives I see, hear, and process daily when caring for elders. I would have loved more discussion from Nan to integrate perspectives. I will use this with geriatric Nurse Practitioner students to engage realistic discussions about aging. Thanks! If you are ever in Florida I would find a way to meet and discuss this gem

[Nancy · Rating 4 out of 5]

For one who has never felt obligated to read a book from the front cover to the back, Aging: An Apprenticeship was a delight. First, I dove into Nan Narboe's introduction into my own aging and Aging. From there, I flipped first to "my" decade, the 60s, and started reading. What did other's experience as sixty-somethings? Wanting to catch glimpses of what lay ahead for me, I kept reading through the 70s, 80s, 90s and beyond. Finally, I circled back to the "youngsters" in their 40s and 50s.

Within Aging, I found new voices and writings by authors who have been part of my life for decades. I found insights and perspectives on this journey of aging. I discovered authors I thoroughly enjoyed and whose books I will seek out soon.

Nan Narboe wrote, "Aging brings constraints...What we want to know is how to live well within those constraints." That is what I wanted to know too. Nan set me at the table with my favorite companions on this life journey--authors--and I am excited about the journey ahead.

[Marilyn · Rating 5 out of 5]

I found this anthology interesting in many ways. First the unusual set-up, with sections divided by decades, so the reader gets to learn about aspects of life and thought at different ages, from the 50s through the 90s. Then there's the variety of perspective: those who view their changing bodies with humor and those who fight the changes or are resigned to them; some looking toward the future, others recalling the past. And they're all reflective, as they consider aspects of their lives at particular ages. The title is evocative because it implies that if you want to age well it would be wise to know what's ahead, as an apprentice learns from one who's gone before. Reading these essays lets you have glimpses of what to expect in your next decade. Some of those included are famous authors, others lesser known, and they all have something intriguing to say. It seems that the older they get the more they marvel at the wonder of life. As Jan Slepian writes, in the 90s section, "It's all astonishing." I haven't reached my 90s yet, but I agree.

[Kiki · Rating 4 out of 5]

An anthology of writers on the experience of aging, divided into chapters by decade, i.e., writers in their forties, in their fifties, sixties, etc. Some essays were excellent; others were predictable, even worn. I found the older writers more interesting than the younger ones, but perhaps that is to be expected. Mary Ruefle wrote a particularly incisive, brilliant piece.

So this book is sometimes a 3 star and sometimes a 5 star, but overall worth a read.

[Laurie Siblock · Rating 4 out of 5]

As I'm in the first years of my 50s and noticing that I'm not the spry, energetic, eager beaver I have been most of my life, I thought it might be a good idea to get a sense of the road ahead. In my younger days I always said to myself that I was going to be an elder person who kept with the times - one who dressed fashionably, kept fit, kept up on music and technologies - someone who didn't let age define them. I'd still like to be that person but as I age, I am beginning to realize that there is a reason people slow down as they get older, and it's not necessarily something to fight. Each age comes with its own blessings and curses and maybe, just maybe one of the blessings of getting older is to do whatever the &^% you want, and if what you really want to do is slow down for christ sake, by all means, slow down.

That wisdom came through in this book of personal essays on aging from authors like Judy Blume, Gloria Steinem, and Diana Athill, writers covering the decades of the 50's, 60s, 70s ,80s and 90s. Of course those writing from their 90s had the most interesting perspectives of all - my favourite essay in the book was from Doris Grumbach who was born in 1918. If you have the courage, pick up this book and take a birds eye view at the road ahead. It isn't all roses and craft beer, but the wisdom imparted might make the journey ahead a little smoother, if only because you understand that what you are experiencing is what everyone before you has and everyone behind you will as well - if only you and they are lucky to live long enough.

[Richard Subber · Rating 5 out of 5]

Narboe created a handy and wide-ranging collection of reflections on the art, science, and humanity of the aging process. More than 50 authors tell it like they think it is, for folks nearing the increasingly ordinary age of 50, and for folks in their 50s, 60s, 70s , 80s, and 90s and beyond. If you’re not in one of those groups, you will be sooner than you think.

Of course, the explicit premise of most of the authors in Aging: An Apprenticeship is that life can be good (or not), aging happens to everyone, and dying is the end game.

Gloria Steinem’s contribution is on point, completely tolerable, and instructive. She says:
“After all, we are communal creatures who must mirror each other to know who we are. Every living thing ages and dies, yet humans seem to be the only species that thinks about aging and thinks about dying. Surely, we are meant to use this ability, especially in a country that suffers so much from concealing aging and dying as if they were the last obscenities.”

For Aging: An Apprenticeship, Narboe has collected essays that range from whimsical to doggone serious. Each author offers a very personal argument that aging and dying are 100% natural.
Read more of my book reviews and poems here:
http://richardsubber.com/

[VW · Rating 3 out of 5]

3.5 STARS

[Sally · Rating 3 out of 5]

I didn’t learn very much about getting old but did enjoy reading about people’s lives. As with most collections, the essays were uneven in quality and everyone will like and dislike various ones.

[Lainey · Rating 3 out of 5]

3.5

[Ursina · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is a beautiful and carefully picked collection of very personal insights and commentaries about aging. Short texts from a wide range of authors cover each decade from "Nearing 50" to "The 90's and Beyond". Like a skilled DJ, Nan Narboe knows how to find gems, and how to align them for our pleasure. It's a book I wanted to keep close and read slowly, and yet, found it hard to put down. Each short essay provides something so unique and precious that I wanted to continue to the next, and couldn't wait to see what the following decades would bring.

[Mills College Library]

305.26 A267n 2017

[Lloyd Fassett]

9/9/17 Found it in Bend Bulletin reprint of a WaPo review.

[Lois Campbell · Rating 5 out of 5]

An engaging book of honest, refreshing and comforting stories of aging.