The Man Who Lived

by sebastianL

Draco breaks a cup, and one thing leads to another. A story of redemption, tattoos, dreams, mistakes, green eyes, long conversations, and copious amounts of coffee.

Set in New York twelve years after the war.

Genres: Fan Fiction, Romance

929 pages, ebook

Published February 12, 2017

Reviews

[Dani]

I’ve thought a lot about why I like Harry Potter and it’s fanfiction so much.
I’m a late-comer to Harry, I was too adolescent snobbish to read the series when I should have (about 20 years ago :-) – and then deliberately did not touch it to be able to discover it with my son.

There was one moment while reading, when I felt this tingle of elation, this feeling of having stumbled unto something really good and meaningful to me.
This was the scene when Harry discovered the Black family tapestry in Sirius’ house and the intergenerational family tree of the Black/Malfoys unfolded in front of our eyes, featuring several members burned out.

And there it is, that’s the draw of these stories for me.

JKR has written a quite sophisticated tale about the intergenerational effect of narcissistic ideology, violence and war trauma on both victim and perpetrator families, the unavoidable attachment disorders that always follow this kind of trauma - and their various and deleterious effects on the next generations and society.
And these are exactly the themes my favorite fanfiction writers brilliantly and poignantly elaborate on in their stories

And in this particular story, the way SebastianL captures, scene after heartbreaking scene, the encroaching, tainting, warping effect of ideological, narcissistic and emotional abuse in childhood, it just blew me away.

For example this scene with Draco’s happiest day, where they consciously, abusively imprint the ideologically appropriate patronus – it is, by far, the best, most powerful allegory of narcissistic, emotional abuse in childhood I have ever read. In any fiction.

It broke my heart, especially Draco’s helpless acknowledgement, that this is still his happiest day.
That this is, STILL, his imprint of attachment, of being seen, of being loved, even though it is thoroughly warped and fabricated.
How can a child survive that? How can a child navigate a childhood this warped, this void of any real attachment, while being spoiled at the same time? It must be so incredibly damaging and confusing.
Or for example Draco contacting his father again, after all that happened, after all his inner work and growth, after he put thousands of kilometers between him and his toxic family, after everything – he still, desperately wanted his father to SEE him, as a separate being, as a person. To be acknowledged, accepted and heard – and loved.
SebastianL describes on point exactly the self-destructive compulsion kids have, who grew up in these kinds of families. This futile insanity to always go back to the source of all the pain and try, again, to be seen. Ugh.

In this story, there are all these little scenes which make palpable, really make me feel in my bones, the emotional and psychological effects of totalitarian, inhumane ideologies, how they infiltrate the most private places, how they warp any and all attachment between human beings from birth – and then leave seriously damaged people for generations to come.

So even if there are some pacing issues and the end of the story left me slightly emotionally drained because I did not experience the psychologically plausible closure I craved, I will always treasure this story for it’s deep insight and powerful allegories.

[Blinkin'ijiot]

Fascinating story, but could stand some tightening up. VERY different characterizations of Draco and Harry. It isn't specifically a traditional Drarry; it is much more Draco's post-war story, but Harry is definitely there. It is bittersweet, and the most reality based story of this genre I have ever read. They really are grown-ups, dealing with a very grown-up reality. It isn't a comedy or tragedy, but just life.

It deserves more readers. Specifically those looking for something different.

[bubblegumpopper]

This story was soo good! I stayed up until 1 am reading (and crying) last night and I loved it. I found the Azkaban chapter was really captivating. The author did a fantastic job of painting a mental picture in that chapter and even though it was less than happy subject matter, it was very compelling to read.

Harry swallows, then looks me in the eyes, steady. “I think of what I did to you as just a footnote. A minor event in a never ending list of awful things that happened. I know that’s shitty, and I’m sorry for that. I’m—you know I’m self-centered. I’m a real prick about it sometimes too, and I’m sorry for that as well. You, though—you’ve got to look at what I did to you every day. It’s not a minor event, it’s—me almost killing you, and I can’t expect you to not talk about it just because I don’t think about it that often.”

One of the things that I found really compelling about this story is the depth of the characters. Nobody was cookie-cutter people and they were all blessed with both flaws and strengths. Draco's torturing of Lyman is both terrible and understandable and I love that this fic floats so comfortably in that grey area of morals. Nowhere is this more obvious than in their portrayal of the Malfoy family. Family can be complicated and you can both love someone and hate how they behave at the same time. Watching Draco and his family interact in this was so enjoyable to read and really made these characters relatable and feeling fully 3-dimensional and not just stock "bad guys".

Overall I loved the story and would 100% recommend it to others (and have!), but I do think there are a couple of weaknesses. The Evan ghost storyline felt rushed. I am hardly ever one to say that fics should be longer because in general I think fanfics are often stretched too long, but in this case I think it felt too rushed paired with the Drarry romance aspect finally happening. I would have loved to see a couple of more chapters focusing on Evan's haunting of Demetrius and the resolution to that.

I also don't really think that the Mistress Teseli and Mrs. E characters were wrapped up as neatly as they could have been. I would obviously have loved more Drarry sexy times as well, but it's not a dealbreaker for me.

Other than those things, which definitely didn't ruin the story for me at all, I thought this was really well written and executed and I look forward to reading more works from this author!

One final little thought:

For want of anything better, I say, “So we’re people who do this, then?”

I love this little Scorbus allusion when Harry and Draco are hugging at the airport!! 😍

[Kythwena]

Awesome. Graciously written. Beautiful story. Bittersweet, about important matters. Rollercoaster of dealing with grief, guilt and spectrums of love. About forgiveness in the truest form and most of all about power of kindness - not pity but consideration, power of words that can both built and shatter everything.

[whatashisreading | missing the wing leader]

Coming back to say I think about this story daily. God I miss drarry so much.

[E]

I have read this several times since it was posted and every time it leaves me feeling both emotionally flayed and expanded. It is a magnum opus of a Drarry fic, a masterpiece of a fic in general, and a truly magnificent work of fiction in its own right. I cannot applaud enough the complexity and elegance of the converging storylines, the way they are woven together through Draco's eyes. This characterization of Draco is captivating; the author teased out the most believable balance of tortured and healed in his mind and life. Seeing how his desire for freedom led him into a redemptive life was beautiful, as well as a profound reminder of the strength it takes to walk that path. Draco's unwavering commitment to and love for his boys had me in tears more than once, and the sparks of humor and wit scattered throughout only added to the emotional depth and flexibility of this work. This work is unapologetically, inconsiderately, hauntingly realistic in the best way--it does not shy away from probing at the scars left behind by deep wounds, if only to understand a little better how the wound knit itself back together. I LOVE THIS STORY (but it is not for everyone) (and yet I would, unreservedly, recommend giving it a try).

[Solci]

Of course I’m adding to Goodreads one of my favorite Draco Malfoy post-war fanfiction. The story is beautifully written; there is detail in characters, in the universe, in every scene...it is just perfect.

I was a bit disappointed that drarry was built up perfectly (a good slow burn) and then it kinda felt like we couldn’t really experience them as a relationship. I think that in general some aspects of 'part two' were a bit rushed.

I don’t think the story is for everyone. It is sad and it deals with triggering topics of modern society. But overall, it is beautiful. And I can definitely see myself going back to some scenes often.

[La quisquillosa]

CW: Racism, homophobia, suicide, self harm, mental illness.

Its really refreshing to see a take on a wizard living among muggles, and leaving behind magic.
Im a sucker for a Draco redemption arc and this goes far and beyond. You fall in love with all the original characters and really get invested in their story and their lives.

Harry infuriated me at first but later i understood where he was coming from and i liked to see a story where he doesnt have a perfect future. As every good slow burn book we got a hug at 80% of the book, just one kiss and a vague sex scene.

But really this fic is more about character development and the day by day lives of Draco and everyone around him.

[Lyra]

Well, this was possibly the best Drarry I have ever read.
It was perfect in all senses. I loved the slow pace, the depth of the characters, and their development. The story was perfectly developed, and I loved every moment. I have laughed, cried, smiled... There were dark moments, and happy moments.
When I finished it I felt that I was saying goodbye to a family of sorts, I can believe is over.
This was only matched by The Ordeal of being known in my opinion.
A must read.
I don't know if a can find any other Drarry that matches this.
OMG, I am forever ruined hahaha

[Madhura]

One star less because the only black transwoman I encountered in the fandom turns out evil (this doesn’t much have bearing on the plot) whereas the reformed white pureblood is helping muggles. This is written before JKR started coming out with top terfiest comment of the year every tear but as a gender non conforming brown person, it hurt a bit. Especially as it wasn’t really a plot point to het her tk be evil.

[Kokeshi]

Mi sono commossa più volte. Ecco un'altra storia da aggiungere alle mie preferite. Ho adorato questo Draco e non mi è pesato per nulla che la maggior parte della storia non fosse legata al suo rapporto con Harry ma al suo "lavoro" di educatore di ragazzi difficili. Davvero molto intensi anche i flashback che hanno mostrato il percorso di crescita e maturazione di Draco.

[Sarah]

This was the slowest burn in creation. Could have moved a little quicker at times. Very entertaining.

[Caliope21]

I’m speechless, it was so good! Probably the best fic I’ve ever read.

[Pacg__nkg]

Loved it would give five but its not a story i ever thought about since i read it. The story line and idea was amazing

[Astaroth]

Me pegó fuerte, lloré por Evan. Es de los mejores fics que he leído y tocó una fibra sensible en mi.

[Karly M.]

So wildly unique and compelling ❤️

[Justina.T]

i really liked this, it had a lot of plot and a lot was happening not just the love story i fr liked al the characters (not the police tho he got what was coming to him the bitch)

[sneha]

wow

[Ann]

That ine made me really sad without resolving things for me. I wish there was more of the relationship to balance things but there wasn't.

[Cataws]

me desdibujo el cerebro d una manera impresionante, y obviamente es un fanfic

[S]

The dialogue is amazing and Draco is incredibly forthright and driven. Original side characters really shine in this, and I care as much for them as the MCs. Some unreliable narrator, humor, drama, mystery. This fanfic is wildly different from others in the fandom, and done very well.

Draco strongly in the muggle world, working with at-risk youth and as a receptionist for a tattoo shop.

DMHP

[J E]

One of my very favourite stories ever by one of my favourite transformative works (that’s fancy code for “fanfiction”) authors. Completely blew me away. Angst! Growth! Relationships! Magic! Intrigue! Angst! OCs! Tattoos! Troubled youth! Romance! Humour! Did I mention angst?!

[GrEatE]

re-read august 2020
still as good as the first time!

4.5*

[Akanksha]

This was so different from the usual tropes and very well written. But it felt like wayyyyyyyy too much writing. Like this should be cut down by 1/4 at least.