Man of the House: A Handbook for Building a Shelter That Will Last in a World That Is Falling Apart

by C.R. Wiley, Leon J. Podles (Foreword), Allan C. Carlson (Afterword)

What is your plan for the end of the world as we know it? How will you protect the people you love? What will you leave to them when you are gone? The good news is this is not the first time the world has ended. What's more, men were made for times like these. And the men of the past--the good ones, anyway--have left us a plan to follow. They built houses to last--houses that could weather a storm. This book contains their plan.

Genres: Family, Christian Living, Christian, Theology, Cultural, Nonfiction, Economics

160 pages, Paperback

Published March 22, 2017

About the author

C. R. Wiley is a Presbyterian minister living in the Pacific Northwest. He has written for Touchstone Magazine, Modern Reformation, Sacred Architecture, The Imaginative Conservative, Front Porch Republic, National Review Online, and First Things, among others. His short fiction has appeared in The Mythic Circle (published by the Mythopoeic Society) and elsewhere, and he has published young adult fiction. He is one of the hosts of The Theology Pugcast (a podcast available on iTunes and elsewhere), and he has been a commercial real estate investor and a building contractor. He also taught philosophy to undergraduates for a time. He is the Vice President of the Academy of Philosophy and Letters, and a board member of New Saint Andrews College.

Librarian Note: There is more than one author in the Goodreads database with this name.

Reviews

[Douglas Wilson · Rating 4 out of 5]

Very good, and a lot of fine original thinking here.

[Peter Jones · Rating 5 out of 5]

I will write a longer review later, but for now all I will say is that this book, despite it needing to be longer, it lays out in concise, clear fashion what it means to be the head of a household and how one goes about it. The chapter on Gravitas was superb and addresses one of the gaping holes in my own fathering/husbanding. What sets this book apart from others on the same basic topic is that he emphasizes the home as economic center a desperate need in our day. I plan on having all my sons read this along with Douglas Wilson's books on marriage and Future Men.

[Benjamin · Rating 4 out of 5]

Man of the House by CR Wiley was a wonderful read. I love how he brings up the concept of a biblical household through spiritual, economic, and social lenses. Wiley wants the father of each home to understand how to build a house that will last for many generations. This is a must read for every Christian man.

[Brian · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is a difficult book to read, but a necessary one for our age. This is one of the few books about the family that is genuinely counter-cultural. Imagine it, a book in the twenty-first century that says that the solution to all our woes is the patriarchy. Wiley manages to write a difficult book that is somehow also persuasive, winsome, and even-keeled. While he thinks that working in a cubicle is a bad idea, he also warns his readers not to quit their jobs right away. Even though he sometimes wears the curmudgeon hat, it is clear that he cares about humans flourishing and that he wants men to be manlier so that women can be protected and be nurturers.

He also has what very few doom and gloom cultural analysts have these days: lots of practical ideas about how to fix deep social problems. Oodles and oodles of ideas.

My biggest complaint would be that his stuff on the Trinity as society (and yes, hierarchy) is wrong, but I'm sure if he hangs around the right crowd, he'll realize that the idea was invented by softy liberals who wanted God to be like "Oh I love you!" "No I love YOU," "No I love both of you" for all eternity.

It's a challenging book. It's probably not all correct in either analysis or prescription, and I'm going to have to do some soul-searching about how to implement anything in it. But it doesn't have to be right about everything. We're so far off course in modern corporate America that we're in no position to judge the way the world is going. Our time is the sick time. We are the first people to truly be cut off from nature in very huge ways that have left us completely blind to what it means for humans to flourish.

Also, he's from Connecticut, my home state. Win!

[Nicholas Zerangue · Rating 5 out of 5]

A must read for all Christians. This book will lead you down a path of many great books if you let it (which you should).

[Zack · Rating 5 out of 5]

I have been wanting to read this book for a long time, and I am glad that I finally did. The time reading "Man of the House" was certainly time well-spent, and I intend to return to some of the more practical sections of the book in the future. While Wiley characterizes this slim volume as a handbook, it strikes me more as an extended nuts-to-bolts exhortation to men setting out on adulthood (or a renewed adulthood after floundering in a sea of confusion and/or delusion). I greatly appreciate the flow of logic in the book, beginning with some basic principles (framework) of the household, and proceeding through the economy, polity, and piety of the household on the way to a practical - but not at all cookie-cutter - vision for how the household fits into wider society (think the commonwealth, friendship, and future).

The writing is clear and fast-paced overall, if a little folksy at points (this is not at all meant as a demerit). Wiley impressed me with his uncanny ability to explain complex concepts (Aristotelianism, Platonism, ancient architecture, biblical theology, etc.) in readable and accessible prose. I would be comfortable putting this book into the hands of men at any level of education. Another feature of the book that I appreciate is what I call the "balanced urgency" of the message contained in the volume. "The end of the world as we know it is coming! And so it is a time to build, not a time to lose our heads and descend into madness." Let the reader understand. Highly recommended.

[Kathleen · Rating 4 out of 5]

I initially bought this book for my sons & husband but while I was waiting for them to read it I picked it up myself out of curiosity & really enjoyed it.

The title does give the impression this might be a 'mens only' book but I didn't find that to be the case. There was so much good information that would be of great help in particular to any young person who is either preparing to marry or is newly married. In fact I wish I'd been exposed to many of the precepts in the book when my husband & I were first married & we may have done some things differently.

But, that said, it's never too late to implement some of the valuable nuggets of wisdom & wise counsel in the book & I highly recommend it to people of any age or stage of life as it really stimulate ones thinking about a broad range of subjects people deal with from young adulthood up til the golden years.

I also think this book would be a fantastic option for a mens group to read & discuss together!

I would read more from the author if & when he puts out future books!

[Jake McAtee · Rating 5 out of 5]

Really good stuff. Wiley is wise and careful, marking the tenants of what masculinity ought to look like in a time when most of the things men were counted on to do and produce have been outsourced to an engorged government or technology.

[Luke Randolph · Rating 5 out of 5]

This was fantastic. Wiley covers everything, from covenants to productive property to work to justice to gravitas to household politics to love to household economies, and much more. This one is much more geared specifically towards husbands and fathers, of which I am currently neither but aspire towards the obtaining the title of both one day, Lord willing. Would recommend to any young man who shares my aspirations, or already holds one or both of those titles. Gave me a multitude of reality checks that I will definitely use, and many action steps to take as I move forward. Will likely be coming back to this often. Extremely practical handbook for those who aim to rule well and win the world (if ya know, ya know.)

My one regret: I listened to this on Audible. Nothing wrong with the narration, Wiley himself narrates it and does a phenomenal job. There is just so much coming at you and this book is one worth annotating, which is much easier to do with a paper copy.

All in all, wonderful. Thank you very much, Pastor Wiley.

[Walter Shaw - · Rating 4 out of 5]

The cover of this book is cringy but the content is really thought-provoking. I believe that the rebuilding of the household is a worthy endeavor. Every household will look a little different, but I love the idea of husbands, wives & children working toward a common end together.

[Joshua Centanni · Rating 4 out of 5]

Really helpful.

[Jesse · Rating 5 out of 5]

Wonderful resource. I have read it twice now. Good practical advice on making a productive household. A good, solid biblical foundation. Read it and learn how to make a productive house. Now is a good time to get started.

[Shirah nealy · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is an amazing book that is not only for men, but is something that everyone can take something away from!

[Joshua Jenkins · Rating 5 out of 5]

Challenging and helpful. Born a modern man, you have to work to get tough, resourceful, manly, and successful. Reject modernism, this is the way.

[Sal · Rating 4 out of 5]

I nearly finished this book last night, but alas. Instead of one more book in 2022, this shall be my first book of 2023.

And a fine one at that.

Understand the audience of this book before going in. This is not for single men called to ministry. It’s not for widows or orphans. It’s not for children or women. It’s for men, married, wanting to establish a household for his family.

Got it? Good. Now is where it gets good.

Wiley posits some interesting, and at times revolutionary, thoughts on how society ought to be ordered. And his ideas are practical, demonstrable improvements over where society currently stands, and where it is currently headed.

Perhaps the most important idea in this book (tough choice) is that of work. Productive property is either what you own, or what your boss owns, plain and simple. I tend to favor the idea of owning your means of income, especially after reading this book. While I believe this is a strong point of the book, it is also the biggest weakness.

Wiley seems to think that working for a wage from someone else (IE, wage slavery, which I believe is a proper term, but I digress) is ALWAYS bad (the only exception being picking between wage slavery and starvation) and you should be working to be free from it. I agree with the second point, but not the first. There are lessons to be learned and character to be built in young men by working for someone else, someone who has authority over you for a time. There are other lessons to be had once the man acquires his own property, but those are different, albeit complimentary.

That one disagreement aside, I gleaned much from this book and believe it is one that will yield greater and deeper wisdom upon rereading it.

[Jake Litwin · Rating 5 out of 5]

A must read on how to understand household economics, building productive property, and much more on the roles of the family. Rare to find this kind of wisdom in modern literature today.

“In a world where there are no secure jobs, owning productive property is as close as you can get to real economic security.” - C.R. Wiley

[Márcio Sobrinho · Rating 5 out of 5]

Um manual de sobrevivência muito necessário.

[Ben Franks · Rating 5 out of 5]

There are many different types of books which one might read. For example: if you’re reading a book that talks about things like covenants and the church then you’re probably reading a book on theology. If you’re reading a book that talks about family life, fatherhood, and children you’re probably reading a book on parenting. If you’re reading a book that quotes regularly from Aristotle, Plato, and the Western intellectual tradition you’re probably reading a book on philosophy. If you’re reading a book that talks about economics, property, and using tax structures to increase your prosperity you’re probably reading a book on business or entrepreneurship. If, however, you’re reading a book that does all of the above, chances are that you’re reading C.R. Wiley’s new book Man of the House: A Handbook For Building a Shelter That Will Last In a World That is Falling Apart.

Man of the House is a unique book. In some ways, Wiley’s project is remarkably simple. As Leon Podles says in his foreward to the book: “Chris Wiley provides practical advice for a man to live up to his role as father. […] Wiley helps us see what is necessary to manage a household and its economy well, to provide and protect for a family and to ensure its stability generation after generation.” The idea of “the household” is vital to Wiley’s project. While we tend to water down the concept to reflect some benign image of family life as pictured in The Cosby Show or Leave it to Beaver, Wiley is thinking about something more robust. To comprehend how Wiley uses the term we have to understand how the household has changed over the last 200 years. To quote the book: “We don’t think of our households as centers of productive work. That’s because the economy has largely moved out of the house. During the Industrial Revolution steady work in factories replaced the home economy, and many people were forced to leave home to make a living. In the process the household was reduced to what we think of today – a haven in a heartless world – a place to sleep and eat and maybe watch television” (pg. 30-31).

As he explains elsewhere in the book: “To the old way of thinking, a house was more than a physical building. It’s bricks and sticks were a metaphor for something immaterial, but still very real. […] We don’t think of houses that way any more, largely because the economy has moved out of the house. One thing we can say for modern life is that it has a way of cutting things up. We work downtown, we get our food a the grocery store, we go down the block to learn at school, and we get on a plane to go somewhere and relax. Our lives are divded up among highly specialized institutions. But a household is a general-purpose institution. Before we segregated everything in the interest of efficiency, houses were not only economically productive; they were schools, and nursing homes, and dozens of other things. This is a book about building an old-fashioned, general purpose shelter – a real house – not a house made out of sticks and bricks. This is a good time to build one too; the conditions haven’t been this favorable in a long time” (pg. Xvi-xvii).

Wiley’s book is as much prescription as it is description. He goes beyond mere analysis to provide a road-map for action. This is a paradigm-shifting book. It provides an entirely new (though actually very old) way of looking at households, fatherhood, family life, and work. Though short the book is packed full of solid content. Wiley’s writing is pointed and persuasive. Each chapter is brief but profound. Few will agree with everything Wiley says, but few will be able to walk away from the book without having their ideas challenged and changed by what they read.

Man of the House is a book I want to give to every young man I know who is transitioning into manhood. I’ve never read a book like it, but if Wiley’s ideas can be picked up by a new generation perhaps they won’t seem so unique after all.

[Jared Mcnabb · Rating 5 out of 5]

Having read books by Allan Carlson, Wendell Berry, and the distributivists, I can say that although this book touches on similar themes it is unlike anything else I’ve read. Most of those guys write looking backwards, but Wiley glances back and takes their themes (virtue, family economy, the wrongs of wage slavery) in order to move forward into the future.

At times conceptual, at other times very concrete, this little book has a lot packed into it. I have been challenged in my marriage, in my fatherhood, and in my use of my resources. Loved the chapters on gravitas and piety.

[Johnny Carriere · Rating 5 out of 5]

Very interesting book. Thought-provoking. I learned a lot of new ideas from it. Would recommend.

[Gary · Rating 5 out of 5]

I read this before, and was not sure about some of it (while loving other parts). Since then I have gotten to know the author just a bit online and decided I should hear him out more carefully. This time I again loved the bits that I loved before, but I also understood many of the sections I hadn't understood before in the right light. This is really a fantastic book, with deep wisdom. It challenges more than the areas many of us our willing to have challenged, exposing compromises we have accepted because our grandparents (or theirs) made them so long ago we don't know they are compromises. There's still 0.2% I disagree with, but what book hasn't that or more?

Read carefully, with an open mind, then buy the two follow up books.

Loved it.

[Scott Guillory · Rating 5 out of 5]

Fantastic! Really great stuff!

[Jun · Rating 4 out of 5]

It’s evident that good thinking was involved in this maverick work. One of those rare books I wish was longer.

[William Schrecengost · Rating 5 out of 5]

Very good book. Recommend for men who want to know how to better run their homes. Overall very good, I did disagree with him on a few points.

[Joah Pearson · Rating 5 out of 5]

Lots of practical wisdom. Glad to get it in my bloodstream now cause I'm gonna need it down the road.

[Lukas Mason · Rating 4 out of 5]

This was really, really, really great.

[Brandon H. · Rating 4 out of 5]

When it comes to Christian books on manhood, I'd put this one near the top of the bunch. It's very thought-provoking, practical, and doctrinally sound. It is full of substance. In it, while the author advocates returning to living more of a self-reliant lifestyle that is not dependent on government or big business, it is really about enhancing your value as a man in your roles and relationships. He gives a lot of practical advice on how to achieve this (But the book does not have the feel of a self-help book. It's much deeper than the average self-help book). He is also good at balancing the big picture with the nuts and bolts of application. And he's good at both gleaning wisdom from the past as well as expressing some insightful thinking that's somewhat visionary and forward-thinking. My favorite chapter was the one on gravitas, something desperately needed among a lot of men today.

Many Christian men would benefit from this book, as well as those under their care. I hope it becomes a best seller!

A few quotes -

On authority and the characteristics of a tyrant -

"Perhaps the thing that distinguishes a just man from a tyrant more than anything else is self-mastery. Tyrants managed to gain mastery over others without first mastering themselves. When this happens the people a ruler should serve become his slaves. This master/slave arrangement is somewhat misleading though because the tyrant is also a slave. He is a slave to his appetites. And since he is never free of them, is never truly free to serve anyone else." (45)

On friendship -

"Hopefully it is clear by now that whenever you find two friends you actually have three things: the two people and whatever it is that binds them together. In friendship's lowest form that thing is usefulness. When that thing is pleasure, the friendship can have a short shelf life. But when that thing is goodness itself, the friendship can last in good times and bad. Devotion of this kind may even cause a person to lay down his life." (63)

On economic freedom and freedom itself -

"We are never free in an absolute sense. Freedom is a formula; to be free from one thing, you must depend on something else. Most people today depend on the corporate economy to maintain their freedom from the demands of self-employment and business ownership. But the price of that freedom is wage slavery.

"Liberty in the old-fashioned sense means that you depend on things you have some real say about: things like land you own, or business you own, or even the members of your own household. Maybe we should stop asking our kids, 'What do you want to be when you grow up?' Instead we might ask them, 'What do you want to depend on the rest of your life?' The first question conceals dependency, the second freedom." (68)

[Kris · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is a thoughtful, well-crafted book, a workshop on family life I would recommend to young Christian husband and fathers (and their wives) to read thoughtfully and with discernment. I enjoyed the author’s use of a wide range of classical philosophy and economics references, built on a foundation of biblically Christian advice.

[Nate Hansen · Rating 3 out of 5]

This is a very, very good book until about page 120. The ideas are extremely helpful, the advice is straightforward and thought-provoking.

Every single syntactic or punctuation error that can be committed while still composing readable prose is in this book, with the exception of dangling participles. Mr. Wiley would benefit from a more anal editor.

Skip to the afterword once you get to the bit about arranged marriages.

[Tyler Box · Rating 5 out of 5]

Excellent book. Would suggest reading this asset.