Self Talk: How to Train Your Brain to Turn Negative Thinking into Positive Thinking & Practice Self Love

by Aston Sanderson

80% of the average person's inner mental chatter is negative. But everyone has the power to change theirs. Want to achieve your goals, be more content with yourself, and live your best life? Don't let negative thinking hold you back. Changing how you talk to yourself in your thoughts — with self love, positive thinking and constructive feedback — is the most effective way to change your approach to your exercise routine, diet, relationships, work and life. Read this book to learn how to harness your negative thinking, train your brain for constructive and positive thinking, and make your negative thoughts and positive thoughts work toward your goals. *New 2nd Edition! Updated & Expanded* This book contains new content — Self Talk in the Age of Social Media — and has been edited and streamlined for an error-free reading experience. After reading this book you will know how Apply better mental strategies and tricks to daily life through changing negative thinking into positive thinking Use simple exercises to expand your thinking Declutter your mind of unproductive thoughts Finally achieve the things you couldn’t motivate yourself to do before as you learn to train your brain Approach your relationships to others and yourself with better understanding with self love Stop racing thoughts Stop worrying or worry less Gain distance and necessary perspective from your thoughts Buy “Self Talk” today and learn how to train your brain to be your biggest ally. * You don’t need a Kindle to read this book. Buy this book now and read straight in your browser with the Kindle Cloud Reader.

Genres: Self Help, Personal Development, Psychology

86 pages, Kindle Edition

Published March 29, 2017

Reviews

[Melissa · Rating 4 out of 5]

I was provided a complimentary copy of this audio by the author in exchange for an honest review.

Ok, I think we can all say we've had negative thoughts about ourselves in one way or another. Personally I still think of things I did as a kid (and beyond) and think of how I could have done "whatever" differently. And of course I have moments where I forget something and yell at myself for being stupid. I don't usually beat myself up for long and for the most part I when I do something "dumb" I talk to myself in my head and then forget about. But of course sometimes there are things you just can't let go of. I'm not going to say what mine are (kinda personal) but usually those thoughts come in a torrent when I wake up at 2am for whatever reason and then I can't go back to sleep, then BAM, on come those thoughts.

Usually my method to try and clear my head is too picture a field, a pretty green field with colorful flowers and sunshine and butterfly's, and a little girl (basically me) running and having fun, not a care in the world. Honestly that doesn't work for long because my brain will stay on that thought for a minute and then flash to something else, and I have to consciously bring myself back to that sunny field. Sometimes I can fall back asleep, but more often than not I can't and I either end of lying their or listening to an audiobook hoping to distract my mind enough to nod off again.

But now I have another method to try after listening to "Self Talk." We are indeed our own worse critics and it's hard to stop. I've known about my own "self talk" for a long time, since I was a kid actually. Since I am an introvert and awkward in social settings, I was (and am) always talking to myself about being more open and out there. Not easy, let me tell you. But did just listen to Small Talk: How to Talk to People, Start Conversations, Improve Your Charisma, Social Skills and Lessen Social Anxiety and learned several techniques to try. :)

I'm not saying I am cured, but there are exercises in this book to help you work through some of your biggest negative thoughts. I've just listened to this audio once, but I will be doing it again and I will be taking notes and trying to work thru some of the exercises. I finished this story earlier today and I have been thinking about some of the tips or strategies mentioned ever since.

The narrator, I loved his voice. It reminded me of Peter Coyote this actor, who's face I can see but the name is escaping me!!! Argh!!! When it comes to me I will be sure to update this. But I really loved his voice and since it sounded familiar, and I like the actor who's voice it sounded like, it felt comforting to hear him speak, like an old friend. Gah, talk about inner voice!! This is killing me.

I do recommend this and I look forward to listening to this again. I know it will help me if I practice and use the strategies outlined.

[Meghal Bhatt · Rating 5 out of 5]

Kickstarting 2022 by reading (& finishing) this book on 1st January. It was such a treat.

[Andy Kuoch · Rating 4 out of 5]

Worth reading twice

[Oanhbt · Rating 5 out of 5]

Mình học NLP, đọc qua quyển này thấy có sự liên quan.
Có lẽ quy luật hay cơ chế tựu chung là như thế, những quyển sách đã học cũng là củng cố thêm chứ chưa thấy quyển nào nói khác đi.
Đọc được quyển này cũng là duyên.
Biết được bạn Duy, chia sẻ được quyển sách hay, sách có word wise nên đọc khá dễ, trình bày đơn giản, câu từ dễ hiểu.
Mình hiểu self talk là gì: là những tiếng rì rầm trong đầu, những tiếng này rất lạ, mình có làm 10 điều tốt, 1 điều xấu thì nó chỉ rì rầm cho mình nhớ lại điều xấu thôi, 10 người khen mình, 1 người chê nó lại rì rầm cho mình biết là người chê bai là người nói thật, mình đi học gym 2 ngày, nghỉ 1 ngày thì nó rì rầm bảo là mình lười biếng, thế 2 ngày mình không lười nó vứt vào cái xó nào, chưa hết, mình chỉ cần phạm 1 lỗi là nó nói cho mình viễn cảnh mình sẽ tồi tệ ở lỗi thứ hai, thứ ba ... đến thứ n, mình bị sếp mắng ngay lập tức nó nói với mình là mình chỉ là đứa thất bại, mình trở thành kẻ đáng thương nhất trong cái xã hội này, nhưng mà, còn rất nhiều người đang chực chờ thất nghiệp, chuẩn bị xuống chức, giảm tiền một nửa, sao nó không nói cho đủ, thật thiếu công bằng.
Nhưng nó lại đang trong đầu mình đó, đồng hành với mình hàng ngày, và mình cũng điên khi không tống nó ra xa xa.
Có cái may là cuộc nói chuyện của mình với nó là bí mật, mà có phải nói chuyện 2 chiều đâu, nó như một bà lắm điều lảu nhải suốt bên tai mình thôi

Mình biết, con người thường có xu hướng là, nghĩ mình thế nào thì cho mình là thế ấy, mà tai hại là, cái nghĩ mình là thế nào toàn do con mẹ lắm điều nó rì rầm cho nghe, nó thì có nói được gì hay ho đâu, toàn chọn ngững điều vớ vẩn tiêu cực cả.

Nên, quyển này là dạy cách tránh xa nó, hoặc lôi ông bạn tích cực ít nói lại gần.

Có mấy loại rì rầm
1. Bộ lọc, như mình nói ở trên, 10 điều tốt, 1 điều xấu nó chỉ nhớ điều xấu thôi
2. Một điều xấu xuất hiện nó sẽ nói cho mình biết là tất cả các điều khác đều xấu theo.
3. Các điều xấu xảy ra đều do lỗi của mình
4. Nếu không tốt một cách hoàn hảo thì chỉ có thể là xấu.
5. Luôn mượn 1 sự kiện nào đoa trong quá khứ để chỉ ra rằng điều xấu sẽ xảy ra, chỉ không làm gì thì mới không có điều xấu.
6. Luôn cảm giác tâm trạng của người khác không tốt là do mình.

Cần phải ý thức và nhận ra sở thích của con mẹ rì rầm thuộc loại nào ở trên.


Hãy nhớ: you are not your thought
Con mẹ rì rầm đó nó chém nhiều lắm, tin ít thôi, đặc biệt lự ý, nếu nó khoái mấy vụ tiêu cực, thì đá nó qua một ên cho lành.


Nếu thay đổi thì mình sẽ được gì?
- Sôi nổi hơn
- Có nhiều time cho sáng tạo và thư giãn, happy với hiện tai thay vì lo lắng vu vơ về tương lai
- Nếu là lãnh đạo sẽ lãnh đạo tốt hơn, suy nghĩ ảnh hưởng đến hành vi, nghĩ tích cực sẽ có phong thái tích cực, sẽ thu hút được nv theo mình.
- đạt được mục tiêu, vì mình có xu hưởng trở thành người như suy nghĩ của mình nên nghĩ tích cực thì sẽ đạt được những điều tích cực.
- An yên: trí óc tĩnh lặng và ôn hoà sẽ tìm được bình yên trong tâm hồn.

Thay đổi bằng cách nào?
Một đứa bé lớn lên sẽ trải qua những hành động đúng và sai, theo thời giam chúng sẽ chọn lựa điều đúng, thought cũng vậy.
Xác định con người hiện tại và con người muốn trở thành.

Fixx mindset: tin rằng con người hiện tại là chính mình, không thể thay đổi
Growth mindset: chỉ cần nỗ lực sẽ thay đổi được mọi thứ.

Xây dựng thói quen
Thức tỉnh: note or phone remind
Gọi đúng tên tiêu cực
Viết ra tiếng rì rầm

Giữ khoảng cách giữa bạn với your thought
Xác định tiếng rì rầm đến từ đâu, từ niềm tin hạn chế của bạn, từ gia đình, người thân, bạn bè, đồng nghiệp?


Đóng gói tiếng rì rầm
Chất vấn nó


Suy nghĩ ngược lại
Nhận ra sức mạnh của mình
Dùng câu từ tích cực hướng đến thay cho tiêu cực


Viễn cảnh
Nhìn thêm 1 hoàn cảnh khác tệ hơn mình
Hài hước một chút
Chả ai quan tâm đến vấn đề của mình đâu
Biến mình thành người thứ ba để phán xét

[Laura M · Rating 4 out of 5]

**I was provided a complimentary copy by the publisher in exchange for an honest review.**

I need to come out and say something about myself, I'm depressive and not biased to the book. Why? Because I'm a sucker for anything that helps turn any sort of negative feelings or thoughts and see things from a new perspective. I've read my share, trust me.

Negative thoughts it's a plague in my brain. Depression alongside anxiety definitely only intensifies what negative thoughts I have and meditation is the main way to talk to myself.

Let's review for a moment your life... we've all had thoughts about ourselves in a negative way such as: "I'm so stupid for...", "I shouldn't have...", "I suck at...", "Why bother?"... to mention a few. & this is something that is always with us while we grow and as a pet given to use on its 3rd month for our 3rd birthday, it grows along with you.

I'm not going to try to delve too deep into the reason why I accepted the book but more what I learned from it. First, I wouldn't say I adore it but I like it. I liked it, a lot. It's short, concise and focuses on methods on how to talk to yourself and listen to your brain and gut but I didn't love it simply because I'm more of scientific information (depression books tend to explain how the serotonin, dopamine, etc work as neurotransmitters).

As humans, we tend to be less kind to our own people as well as self-destructive tendencies and this is no different. We are our worse critique, more if we love perfection. Such a concept doesn't exist in real life but it's always the unattainable goal.

It's not simple to stop or let things go but it's imperative that we learn to be more kind to ourselves. To try to believe we are worth a break, a meltdown, a crisis, to be able to get over something and move forward. I'm not saying the book will cure you because there is no magic pill but it does provide a new perspective on a subject you've gotten stuck on feeling like a failure.

The book does teach small daily life techniques to learn how to speak to yourself kinder and decluttering your brain from thoughts that will never be either completely truthful nor will allow you to achieve anything. It also has exercises to help you have a wider and different perspective about your own thoughts.

I liked the book so much that I bought the audiobook narrated by Randal Schaffer. The narrator and the words spoken in the book felt comforting and I'll be sure to come back to it.

Laura

[Judith · Rating 5 out of 5]

Easy to read, easy to understand. I like Aston's books. They are always written in a language that the reader can understand. This book is no exception. Covers a whole spectrum of emotional, psychological and personality issues that many people never address or are never encouraged to examine. Sometimes we can be so caught up in the struggles of our daily lives that certain aspects of our personality are allowed to take root without ever examining the justification for their existence. This book will make you think. The author's style is easy going, conveys positivity and the genuine desire to make a contribution to the reader.

I received a free copy of this book via Booksprout and am voluntarily leaving a review.

[Suzan · Rating 2 out of 5]

I had a hard time with this audio book. I found that constant repeating of the same line very distracting and annoying. I also was not a fan of the narrator. I have to say I really enjoyed Aston Sanderson other book "Small talk: How to talk to people and improve your charisma and social skills..." so I thought this book would be good too. I also really liked the the narration in the other book Connie Philips did a great job to bad she didn't read this one it might have helped.

[Tanya · Rating 4 out of 5]

I really enjoyed Self Talk: How to Train Your Brain to Turn Negative Thinking into Positive Thinking and Practice Self Love by Aston Sanderson. A short read full of practical tips and exercises to help you become aware of your self talk and how to make it work for you rather than against you. Each chapter is concise - you could read a chapter in 10 minutes each morning and then spend the day implementing the advice.

[Sandra Fournier · Rating 5 out of 5]

Change your life one thought at a time!


This short book offers great suggestions to stop the negative inner chatter that can so damage our self-confidence and self-esteem. It is succinct and filled with examples that will be familiar to all. I will be recommending it to all of my counseling clients.

[Rita · Rating 5 out of 5]

I was impressed with this book. I enjoyed how the author wrote this book. He made it easy to read. I appreciated how he wrote the examples of how to achieve the results you needed to get rid of negative thinking. There are numerous tips which I will be trying soon. He made the process seem approachable and left me feeling I could succeed! I am glad that I was able to read this book.

[Helfren · Rating 3 out of 5]

This book is all about how we can train our brain and practise more positive thinking. It is a very interesting aspect of brain that many people don't know. The monologue of the brain can be shaped into what we want to be actualize. The beauty of negative, positive and neutral thinking can help to alter our life significantly.

[Ashley Hedden · Rating 5 out of 5]

Self Talk: How to Train Your Brain to Turn Negative Thinking Into Positive Thinking & Practice Self Love By Aston Sanderson was a good read. It is a good way to train your brain against negative self talk and starting positive self talk.

[Mark Tollefson · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is a great book. .

I just finished reading this. I plan to put the exorcise s to practice. Slowly making them a daily habit. I have been doing a couple before even reading this. Our minds are a powerful tool. Be careful what you allow in.

[Roxann Pool · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is a good, quick read with some good ideas. I did gather a few new tips, but please correct the typo's. Good but could be even better. I gave it 3 and half stars.

I received a free copy of this book via Booksprout and am voluntarily leaving a review.

[Rebecca · Rating 5 out of 5]

I was hooked after the first bit of this book. It is not often that I read a book and think it was written with me in mind, but boy, did this one do that. I will be implementing some of these tips to make myself a better me. I voluntarily read and reviewed this book in exchange for a free copy.

[Pat Eroh · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is very informative and helpful for improving your outlook on yourself and life. I find the information easy to understand and use and have incorporated this into my daily life.

I received a free copy of this book via Booksprout and am voluntarily leaving a review.

[Celicia Fowlkes · Rating 4 out of 5]

Good book to read if you doubt yourself too much. Good tips to use and they work. This will be used for my personal reference when I doubt myself.

I received a free copy of this book via Booksprout and am voluntarily leaving a review.

[Clay Lowe · Rating 2 out of 5]

It's an okay overview

It's an ok pamphlet to introduce to the concept of self talk. I call it a pamphlet instead of book because it is very short and could have been shorter. You'd do well just to do a Google search on self talk.

[Claudia · Rating 3 out of 5]

A little too basic for me. Found myself wanting to fast forward through the pages. Too many disclaimers from the author too.
Obviously took me forever to read it too, didn’t grab me!

[Siyka · Rating 3 out of 5]

Good read!

[Mrs V A Dark · Rating 3 out of 5]

Short and to the point

Easy to follow and understand, some obvious statements and chapters.
Worth a read for confirmation
Short, read in 2 sittings.

[Marianne · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is a really helpful book! It's inspirational and helps you dig into the things that cause you trouble..

I received a free copy of this book via Booksprout and am voluntarily leaving a review.

[Michael McCoy · Rating 5 out of 5]

Ok

Good. straight To the point which is great. Lots of good info and insight on how to think more positively.

[Sez · Rating 5 out of 5]

So simple, to the point, will read again

[Karanjeet Singh · Rating 4 out of 5]

One of the best books

[Marriah · Rating 5 out of 5]

It was an easy to read format with many helpful ideas and suggestions. For such a short book it was very thorough. I especially appreciated the exercises that accompanied each chapter.