Ashes to Asheville

by Sarah Dooley

Two sisters take off on a wild road trip in this poignant tale for fans of Counting by 7s and Fish in a TreeAfter Mama Lacy’s death, Fella was forced to move in with her grandmother, Mrs. Madison. The move brought Fella all sorts of comforts she wasn't used to at home, but it also meant saying goodbye to her sister Zoey (a.k.a. Zany) and her other mother, Mama Shannon. Though Mama Shannon fought hard to keep Fella, it was no use. The marriage act is still a few years away and the courts thought Fella would be better off with a blood relation. Already heartbroken, Fella soon finds herself alone in Mrs. Madison's house, grieving both the death of her mother and the loss of her entire family.      Then one night, Zany shows up at Mrs. Madison’s house determined to fulfill Mama Lacy’s dying to have her ashes spread over the lawn of the last place they were all happy as a family. Of course, this means stealing Mama Lacy’s ashes and driving hundreds of miles in the middle of night to Asheville, North Carolina. Their adventure takes one disastrous turn after another, but their impulsive journey helps them rediscover the bonds that truly make them sisters.A heartrending story of family torn apart and put back together again, Ashes to Asheville is an important, timely tale.

Genres: Middle Grade, Realistic Fiction, LGBT, Young Adult, Fiction, Family, Grief

253 pages, Kindle Edition

First published April 4, 2017

Reviews

[Elle (ellexamines on TT & Substack) · Rating 4 out of 5]

“People are all the time expecting me to understand things I can't get my brain around. Like how to be brave, or how to find the right words to say what's on my mind. Like how to accept somebody could die and be gone when I wasn't finished loving them yet.”

Ashes to Asheville is the most emotionally destructive children's book I've read in my life. I sobbed all through the last chapter. What engaging characters and what real emotions.

I really don't think this is a book you can meaningfully review; it's a book you have to experience. All I can say is that Ashes to Asheville is about the complexities of family. Our protagonist is living with her grandmother after one of her mothers has died. Her sister is living with her other mother. Each feels they have a claim on her, yet each truly do love her.

Okay, it's an interesting premise and has a lot of potential. But honestly, this book succeeds mostly in the field of making you fucking cry. This book is written gorgeously. Emotion drips from every page. Every character feels real and genuine. Truly, though, this book succeeds the most through its themes of family and mourning. This story is so sad and yet so true to life, so real, so necessary.

My one complaint might be the slowness of the plot. Conflict towards the beginning feels manufactured and often doesn't ring true, until we reach the ending. However, this was completely remedied by the perfectly hopeful ending.

VERDICT: With a cry-worthy yet hopeful message, this book will work for YA, MG, and adult readers alike. I can't recommend this enough.

[Josephine Sorrell · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is quite simply or not so simply, the story of family. All families are different but they all involve heartache and most involve undying love. Such is the case here. This is the story of Two women, Shannon and Lacy who fell in love and wanted to spend their lives together married. This couldn't happen because they are both female. It is 2004 and gay marriages haven't been legalised. So, they "marry" and there are two children, Zaney and Fella. Both are nicknames for Zooey and Ophelia. This is a beautiful happy loving family living in Asheville. Then Lacey is diagnosed with cancer and dies. The family is torn apart for the good of the children. The judge sends Fella to live with her biological grandmother and Zaney goes with her biological mother Shannon. Mama Shannon is understandably very depressed over losing her mate. One night Zaney, now 16, shows up, wakes Fella and they embark on a journey back to their home in Asheville , where they once all happily lived as a family. Lacey would have turned 40 this day and Zaney is on a mission to scatter her ashes in the place she was happiest living with her girls and Mama Shannon. They plan to be back before the sun comes up and no one will know they ever left. Well, you know that didn't happen. Read about the girls harrowing road trip, complicated by the presence of a 12 year old poodle named Haberdashery. I was pulling for them the whole way even though what they were doing was very dangerous. The whole book takes place in 24 hours where you will hold your breath.

[Nat · Rating 5 out of 5]

Not entirely sure how Sarah Dooley managed to make this book feel like a hug and a right-hook to the face and holding your breath all at the same time. But she did. And anyone who reads it will be better for having been held and sucker-punched and suffocated by it. Good, good goodness.

[Jan · Rating 5 out of 5]

I loved, loved, loved this book. I couldn't put it down and read it all in one sitting today. It made me laugh, it made me cry, and then it found a way to crawl inside my heart and wrap around it. The story and the characters are going to stay there for a long time.

[Layla · Rating 4 out of 5]

I loved the lgbtqia+ representation as it is something i strongly stand for!! Other than that it was a really good book and I loved how the relationships and feeling were portrayed. Would definitely recommend. I really enjoyed reading it!

[grier t · Rating 5 out of 5]

Ok. How do I begin?! Short but sweet 😘. Zany and Fella are the most perfect dynamic duo and THE ENDING. The last 30-50 pages are so amazing. The entire book is a page-turner. I love Fella. I love Zany. I love it all.

[Alana · Rating 2 out of 5]

For fans of Kate DiCamillo--so, not me.

[Hoover Public Library Kids and Teens · Rating 4 out of 5]

This novel of the recent past perfectly captures the realities of being loved and raised by same-sex parents . . . and what happens when one of them is no longer around to love and raise them.

[Erin · Rating 5 out of 5]

After her biological mom dies, Fella goes to live with her grandmother Mrs. Madison. Her sister Zany comes in the middle of the night and steals Mama Lacy's ashes. Fella decides to tag along and brings Mrs. Madison's dog Haberdashery. Zany and Fella are trying to make it to Asheville and back before morning. They plan to spread Mama Lacy's ashes. Problems arise though and they get help in unexpected ways. Before they make it, Mrs. Madison and Zany's mom, Mama Shannon meet up with the two.

NC MBOB selection 2021/2022. You really feel for Zany and Fella as they travel to follow their mom's wishes of spreading her ashes in Asheville.

[Allie · Rating 3 out of 5]

3.5

[Cathy · Rating 5 out of 5]

A beautifully-written MG novel that makes you laugh on one page and then reach for a Kleenex on the next as 12-year-old Ophelia and her older sister embark on an adventure-filled road trip, determined to honor the wishes of their late mother. Looking forward to book-talking this one to my students.

[Sarah · Rating 3 out of 5]

I loved the ending. Nice wrap up. But the path to the ending had too many wrong turns- it was frustrating in almost a “slap stick” way.

[Brenda Kahn · Rating 4 out of 5]

Sob! Hand this to your readers who love sad books! The writing is gorgeous! So beautiful that I wasn't pulled out of the story by the few plot contrivances that I didn't stop to mark because I wanted to find out what happened! The book takes place in 24 hours. I read it in one big gulp. Love Sarah Dooley.

[Natalia_c1]

Ashes to Asheville is a book you need to get into before you can really understand. The book is about a lesbian couple with 2 daughter that make their died mom's with come true. This book is hard to comprehend in the beginning but is a great story about relationships and character. I recommend this book to people who like a twist in their stories.

[Amy Dreger · Rating 4 out of 5]

It seems like almost every middle grade book I pick up these days features a child mourning the loss of a dead parent. I'm a children's librarian and sometimes these sad books are hard sells to the audience they are actually intended for. This book is no exception. I think it is a wonderful story but it is so sad. Fella, the narrator, is coming to terms with the recent death of her mother, Mama Lacy, to pancreatic cancer. Fella has two moms, and her non-biological mother, Mama Shannon, also has a daughter, Zany. After Fella's mother's death, the courts force her to move in with her biological grandmother, rather than stay with Mama Shannon. Zany, who is 16, comes to Fella's house late one night to take Mama Lacy's ashes to Asheville, North Carolina where she plans to scatter them as Mama Lacey requested. Fella goes along for the ride and the two encounter many setbacks in their 24-hour road trip.

This book takes place in 2004 when gay marriage was not legal in all 50 states. This is a crucial element to the story - if the book took place today, Fella would not likely have been forced to move out of Mama Shannon's home and move in with her biological grandmother whom she barely knows. I think setting this book in the not so distant past might be confusing for young readers. That was perhaps my biggest complaint with the story. I don't think most children understand the legalities of gay marriage. However, this could be a good book to spur discussion on the topic.

The only other issue I had with this book is that Fella and Zany take a ride from a stranger in a desperate attempt to get to their destination. I've seen this come up in several books lately and I think it sends a horrible message to kids . . .but I am a parent and am hyper aware of these things. This particular stranger steals from Zany and Fella but they hop into his truck anyways.

Overall I really did enjoy this book. I thought the characters were very well-developed and I liked the relationship between the two sisters - they would bicker like any normal siblings and would then get along just fine. You could tell that they truly cared for each other. Dooley does a wonderful job of capturing the pain of loss from each character's perspective and proves to the reader that families can come in all shapes and sizes.

[Mary Louise Sanchez · Rating 5 out of 5]

When twelve-year-old Ophelia's mother Mama Lacy dies of cancer, Ophelia (a.k.a Fella) is torn from her other mother, Mama Shannon, and her sister, Zoey (Zany) to live with Fella's grandmother, Mrs. Madison, because the courts don't recognize same sex marriage.

Then Zany shows up at Mrs. Madison's house late at night and gets Fella to help her take Mama Lacey's urn, containing her ashes from the mantel. The plan is Zany will drive Mama Shannon's car to Asheville, North Carolina and the girls will spread Mama Lacey's ashes over the last place the family was happy together, and be back by morning before anyone discovers they and the urn are missing.

The two sisters embark on the adventure of their lives which involves kidnapping Mrs. Madison's yipping poodle; getting robbed of the urn; befriending the robber; robbing the robber of his truck; driving perilous icy, mountainous roads; all the while, bonding as sisters.

The story makes one think about what makes a family.

[Stephanie · Rating 4 out of 5]

Another tear-jerker from the author of the excruciatingly painful Free Verse. Fella is twelve years old when one of her mothers dies. Because her moms weren't married, Mama Shannon loses custody of Fella to her bitter grandmother, Mrs. Madison. Fella has spent the last six months drowning alone in her grief, until one night her older sister accidentally rescues her, and they set out to return Mama Lacy's ashes to their beloved former home in Asheville, North Carolina. This is not quite as sad as Ms. Dooley's first novel, and at times it's a little preachy regarding same-sex marriage. But I was so worried about Fella and her fractured family that I couldn't put it down.

[C. L. · Rating 2 out of 5]

A worthwhile subject (the legal limbo of the children of same-sex couples) is drowned by one of the most unlikeable protagonists I've read in a middle-grade book in ages. Her older sister was no picnic either, but I kept rooting for her to smack the protagonist and leave her on the side of the road. Hard to like a book when you wish nothing but bad things on the obnoxious heroine. Not recommended.

[Jenni Frencham · Rating 2 out of 5]

Give to fans of The Truth About Twinkie Pie

[Mrs. · Rating 2 out of 5]

Disappointing after her amazing Free Verse. I dislike road trip books, and the bickering of the sisters grated on me. SO many coincidences, not so believable.

[Amy · Rating 3 out of 5]

I loved the idea of this book, but the ending was too abrupt after the long journey to get there.

[michelle · Rating 4 out of 5]

I really enjoyed reading this book, but I'm not sure that a middle-grader would pick it up if it wasn't assigned or if unless they came from a family with same-sex parents.

Overwhelmingly, this is a story of grief and of 4 people who desperately miss one woman but haven't allowed themselves to grieve. Fella is mad at Mama Shannon because she feels neglected. Zany is mad because their life right now is so difficult. Mama Shannon is incredibly sad about losing her wife and daughter at the same time. Mrs. Madison misses her daughter and doesn't know how to connect with Fella. Zany resorts to a crazy act of stealing her mother's ashes to bring them back to the last place they were truly happy - Asheville.

The book is a road-trip, but that trip is a vehicle for Fella to grow and figure out how to heal her family. The notion of the two girls driving through the middle of the night to get from West Virginia to Asheville, NC is a little insane, but it worked. Of course, they confronted problem after problem and yet continued on. On the road they wound up also meeting another teen dealing with the prospect of losing a parent. Adam is on his way to the hospital where his father is dying. When he finally gets there, he doesn't know what to say. It winds up being Fella that helps him and at the same time helps herself. As an adult, I had some issues with the idea of the girls getting into the car of a stranger, but Adam had an important role in Fella understanding death.

This is also a book that tackles the idea of allowing people to follow their dreams and their personal choices. Zany wants to scatter Mama Lucy's ashes in Asheville because that's what Lucy wrote to her family in a letter before she died. But it is hard for Fella, Shannon, and Mrs. Madison to let her go. Fella wanted to live with Mama Shannon and Zany and begged Mrs. Madison not to take her away, but Mrs. Madison did what she thought was right. More than anything, it is the entire LGBTQ community asking to be heard, to be allowed to make their choices and love who they want to love.

A beautiful book that I hope reaches its intended audience.

[Sandy · Rating 5 out of 5]

4.5 stars
I absolutely loved this novel. It was fun, entertaining, captivating and it was delightful. It was a journey that had me turning the pages so fast, it was over before I knew it.

It was fun in the way that sixteen-year-old Zany and twelve-year-old Fella took off with Mama Lacy ashes on a mission to fulfill her last wishes by scattering her remains where she wanted to be. Entertaining because this mission involved many people, where they meet a police officer, where Zany drives a semi-truck, where they go shopping filling up a cart to the top and it didn’t cost them anything, where the conversations are endless and I learned a great deal about these young girls and their lives. It was captivating as I couldn’t put this novel down as the opening pages started with Zany snatching Mama Lacy off the mantel and the girls jumping into Mrs. Madison’s car. Haberdashery is making noise out in the yard and they can’t take him back inside for fear that they will wake up Mrs. Madison and blow their cover, so inside the car he goes, they now have a dog along on their trip. There is talk of a Mama Shannon amongst the girls, this woman I don’t know anything about but as the conversation continues I realize that she is Zany’s mother and that she loved Mama Lacy. Mama Lacy was Fella’s mother and she loved Mama Shannon. The four of them used to live under the same roof but that was before cancer took Mama Lacy away and that was before Mrs. Madison took Fella away from her remaining family. I love listening to the girls and their spunky conversation in the car. Fella is hoping that Zany had a plan when she picked today to start off on this trip and she does have a plan, to get the ashes to Asheville but it all the incidentals along the way that cause the glitches for the girls. It was delightful as it was an enjoyable read: it was exciting, it was comical at times and a very interesting read. What a fantastic novel, a good feel book for me. I highly recommend this novel.

[Int'l librarian · Rating 1 out of 5]

The ending takes this story right down the drain. It’s not as if I like the beginning or middle, because I don’t. But the ending manages to make everything that comes before seem fine in comparison.

Dooley’s message is warm and thoughtful and inclusive, befitting a plot with same-sex parents and terminal illness at the core. If only we can love each other enough, we can survive the worst of our sorrows. And if our hearts are in the right place we can forgive the worst of our failings. Those sentiments and the progressive rural perspective make me think of Newbery aspirations.

But I can’t bring myself to like much of anything about 12-year-old Ophelia and her older sister. The family calls Ophelia "Fella." Her sister is Zany. Sweet kooky nicknames, for what? To somehow soften their impossible bitter whiny impulses? Their road trip - ashes to Asheville - isn’t even all that interesting. Sure, crazy things happen. But the details are too ridiculous, and the story thread is too patchy. And their mission is wrong on so many levels.

Fella is quick to complain about all the wrong. And that just makes her a complainer. The adults eventually get the chance to act on their concerns about the children, and that makes more sense. But it’s not enough to fend off Fella and Zany’s obnoxious momentum. So Fella takes one more inexcusable unbelievable leap. Right down the drain.

[Whitney · Rating 5 out of 5]

So good! I sobbed and laughed through the whole thing. Sarah Dooley really captures the voice of her 12 year old narrator. I think I responded to the story so emotionally because it hit so close to home. It is about two sisters with two moms. When one mom dies, her biological daughter is taken away from her other mom and sister and sent to live with her grandmother. The story takes place in West Virginia in the early 2000s before same-sex marriage was legal. It was sort of a "there but for the grace of God go I" feeling. When William was born, I had no more claim to him than someone off the street. The hospital could have prevented me from being in the NICU with him, but we got lucky and they didn't. We were lucky to live in a state where second-parent adoption was legal and we were very lucky to have families who accepted us and our marriage and would fight for our rights. So the story rang so true for me in so many ways. But while I reacted strongly given my own circumstances, the story is really more about two young girls and their process to understand their mother's death. And it's about taking care of the people you love and how complicated life can be with people you love. All in all, a really wonderful tale.

[Dehlia · Rating 4 out of 5]

4.5 stars. Epic sister road trip adventure with serious (and somber/heart wrenching) themes. If you liked Coyote Sunrise, try this one. You will love Fella and Zany and even the silly poodle Haberdashery. And if you are a sister or you live with sisters, their relationship is so spot on true to the love-hate, need enigma of sisterhood.

Also, the BEST HOOK ever. I was laughing and crying with its perfection and immediately pulled in.

~~~ Chapter 1 ~~~
“Right before my sister, Zany, steals our dead mother off the mantle, I’m trying to decide which sock to stuff in Haberdashery’s mouth to shut him up. He’s barking every five seconds, yip yip yip, all shrill like a smoke detector with its battery is low. It’s a wonder Mrs. Madison hasn’t come downstairs in her slippery cheetah robe, waving Mr. Madison‘s ancient handgun. She keeps the thing in her purse, says a widow as pretty as her needs protection, especially with, what she calls it, her assets. I thought she was talking dirty the first time I heard that, till Mama Shannon explained she meant money.”

I mean, sorry, but how can you not stop everything you are doing and read this entire novel today?

It’s only 238 pages and you will devour them all before you realize what’s happened.

[Toni Wyatt · Rating 5 out of 5]

While I’m not sure I agree that this should be a middle grade book because of the behaviors of our main characters and not because of subject matter, I do think YA and older readers would love this story.

Ophelia is a twelve year old girl living with her grandmother in West Virginia. How she got there is a long, sad story. One of her moms dies, and the laws in West Virginia don’t protect her other mom from losing her. When her sister, Zany, shows up one night and breaks into the grandmother’s house to steal back their mother’s ashes, the two girls, and the grandmother’s poodle, head off on a wild trip to take their mom’s ashes back to North Carolina where they had all lived happily before their mother’s illness.

To say this book is a wild ride is putting it mildly. It was harrowing and pulse pounding in parts. The girls make a lot of unwise decisions, and the reader is drawn in to their story deeper with every page.

This was an emotional read for me. I cried in several places near the end which pushed this to a 5 star read. Beautiful story about what family means and how if we listen to each other, there is hope.

The first chapter is confusing as we have no context as to what is happening. I’d rip it up and rewrite it. Push past it to find the treasure within.

[Susan Dunn · Rating 4 out of 5]

Fella (Ophelia) and her older sister Zany (Zoe Grace) have been separated since their Mama Lacey died of cancer several months ago. Mama Lacey was Fella's biological mom, and their other mother, Mama Shannon, gave birth to Zany. Before Mama Lacey got sick, the family lived happily in Asheville, North Carolina. But once Mama Lacey wasn't able to work any longer, they were forced to return to West Virginia, where it was cheaper to live, and both women had family. After Mama Lacey died, Mama Shannon petitioned the courts for custody of both girls, but it was felt that Fella would be better off with a biological relative. She appreciates the fancy house and good food at her grandmother's, but she misses her sister and her other mother terribly. One night Zany appears at the house, and takes the urn containing Mama Lacey's ashes off of the mantel. Her plan is to drive to Asheville, several hundred miles away, to spread her mother's ashes in the last place they were happy as a family. It sounds like an easy and foolproof plan - but nothing goes as expected... Funny, heartbreaking and timely, the sisters' story - and the author's note - will touch all who discover it.

[Bri · Rating 3 out of 5]

3.5 stars. This book is all about grappling with grief and it’s done so well. The author does an excellent job of making you feel like you’re in the narrator’s head as an 11 year old trying to make sense of her mother’s death and the resulting family dynamics. It’s both adult and innocent and the emotions swirling throughout are all so exactly right.

The entire book takes place over one night, so at times the plot dragged on a little long and there were parts that felt overdone to me, but it also does a great job occupying that liminal space between night/day and how you used to know your life/when it’s been turned upside down.

As a gay woman, it also made me think a lot about the time when gay marriage wasn’t recognized legally and the position that so many kids must have found themselves in. The casual mentions of her mothers together were so heartbreaking and I really appreciated the representation of two moms in a YA book, without it being the focus of the plot.

Obligatory shoutout to NC and how much this made me miss home. The mentions of Asheville were so good and right.

[Claudette Dunk · Rating 4 out of 5]

Ashes to Asheville is a YA novel that is quite readable for adults. On the one hand, it aims to teach its youthful readers about the complexity of grief and the ways of eventually coming to terms with loss. On the other hand, it is a coming-of-age novel about a quirky, lovable girl and her equally quirky and lovable older sister. The kids are alright. The adults, on the other hand, seem rather clueless. Mama Shannon is in the throes of grief for her partner, Mama Lacy—which makes her unavailable to her daughters, who are also grieving. Mrs. Madison (Mama Lacy's mother) has obtained legal sanction to raise her granddaughter, Fela, (instead of her daughter's partner, whom she still calls "that woman"), much to the dismay of Fela, who needs her new life to be as close as possible to the life she led before one of her mothers died. Beyond the human interactions, Dooley does a good job of conveying the beauty and tenor of Asheville, the runaway girls' destination. All in all, this is a charming read, despite the sad loss at its center.