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How Did This Happen?: Poems for the Not So Young Anymore
From the bestselling authors of The Hell with Love, a fierce, funny, touching collection that takes the sting out of "aging while female."
255 pages, Kindle Edition
First published April 4, 2017
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Displaying 1 - 15 of 16 reviews
April 16, 2017
Aside from the publicity push of superficial beauty, health, and wellness books written by ex-models and celebrities able to spend thousands on various surgical procedures and enhancements—it is possible to age with dignity and grace. “How Did This Happen? Poems For The Not So Young Anymore” is written by Mary D. Esselman and Elizabeth Ash Velez: both women are teachers, also former reporters of People Magazine, and have enjoyed an abiding friendship that includes a mutual love for literature and poetry.
This daring book speaks candidly to women of nearly every age—whether managing an established career, steering towards retirement, or already retired, the stigma, shame and silence surrounding aging need not be so troubling and problematic. Almost every aspect of “Sister Age” is confronted, the sections include: Injury- Defiance - Dread - Grit - and Grace. From Amy Schumer’s “brilliant feminism” that boldly addresses women of all ages, to Lena Dunham’s “unapologetic frankness” that inspires truth and intimacy, to Dorothy Parker’s “devastating wit”. No book on female aging would be complete without mention of Nora Ephron’s (1941-2012) “I Feel Bad About My Neck” (2008) and “I Remember Nothing” (2010). Prose, poetry, quotes and more are included from numerous noteworthy and classical author’s including Shakespeare.
The inevitable aging process can ravage or redeem us: many women are shocked to lose their looks, problems, regrets, tragedies, can harden or poison our hearts with bitterness.
Zadie Smith observed: “Something changes when women are forced out of the beauty industry and marital fantasy industry—I think they become their real selves. Women… in their fifties… are humans, not refracted images of some insane feminine myth.”
As women slow down, it may not be so bad to contemplate “the blazing beauty” of the world around us, (“Solstice Poem, iv”—Margaret Atwood). We are blessed with more time to reflect on life lessons learned, heal our hurts, and we are wiser for it. ~ Much appreciation and thanks to Hachette Book Group via NetGalley for the direct digital copy for the purpose of review.
This daring book speaks candidly to women of nearly every age—whether managing an established career, steering towards retirement, or already retired, the stigma, shame and silence surrounding aging need not be so troubling and problematic. Almost every aspect of “Sister Age” is confronted, the sections include: Injury- Defiance - Dread - Grit - and Grace. From Amy Schumer’s “brilliant feminism” that boldly addresses women of all ages, to Lena Dunham’s “unapologetic frankness” that inspires truth and intimacy, to Dorothy Parker’s “devastating wit”. No book on female aging would be complete without mention of Nora Ephron’s (1941-2012) “I Feel Bad About My Neck” (2008) and “I Remember Nothing” (2010). Prose, poetry, quotes and more are included from numerous noteworthy and classical author’s including Shakespeare.
The inevitable aging process can ravage or redeem us: many women are shocked to lose their looks, problems, regrets, tragedies, can harden or poison our hearts with bitterness.
Zadie Smith observed: “Something changes when women are forced out of the beauty industry and marital fantasy industry—I think they become their real selves. Women… in their fifties… are humans, not refracted images of some insane feminine myth.”
As women slow down, it may not be so bad to contemplate “the blazing beauty” of the world around us, (“Solstice Poem, iv”—Margaret Atwood). We are blessed with more time to reflect on life lessons learned, heal our hurts, and we are wiser for it. ~ Much appreciation and thanks to Hachette Book Group via NetGalley for the direct digital copy for the purpose of review.
February 26, 2017
A wonderful collection of found poetry to help soothe the soul as the body ages and time passes. Definitely a book I will be revisiting in the future. A lovely and reassuring read that sits with you like a good friend.
June 18, 2017
This collection is perfect for women of all ages. I loved the introductions to each sections and there were a handful of poems I will treasure for years to come!
December 10, 2019
I've read other poetry book compilations from these authors and I think they were better. Most of these were really disappointing.
This was a Dollar Tree find.
This was a Dollar Tree find.
February 12, 2024
I really enjoy the anthologies these ladies put together! At first their long wordy introduction kinda irritated me…and then somehow I began looking forward to them. I can’t say this book is uplifting, as growing older is a slog at times and this book acknowledges that. However, this book kinda winks at it too. 4 or 5 stars, depending on how I’m feeling that day
June 4, 2017
What a good collaboration Mary and Elizabeth!I thoroughly enjoyed this book.It hit on many topics that we all deal with as we grow older.Just listening to my friends and co-workers about things and then reading these-I have to pass this along for them to read too.I know they will take something from it too.Two struck me the most-"You see,I want a lot" was one of them.I felt right at home in this poem.
The other one from Rabbit Ableegumooch on "what the living do".The killer closing stanzas is right.I took great comfort in that and appreciate it being there for me.
"The unendurable happens.People we love die;we're going to die-one day we are going to have to leave our children,leave the plants,the sunlight, the rain and all that.It's unendurable.
Art knows that we're both living and dying at the same time.It can hold it.
I thought,I can either let this crack my heart open or closed.I turned around and the billion other people on this earth who've lost a person they love-there they all were.I turned around:I just joined you.
Welcome.There were millions of people;I was glad to be with them.We join each other;We're not alone.
Holding human stories up:it's so miraculous.
Everything is shared."
The other one from Rabbit Ableegumooch on "what the living do".The killer closing stanzas is right.I took great comfort in that and appreciate it being there for me.
"The unendurable happens.People we love die;we're going to die-one day we are going to have to leave our children,leave the plants,the sunlight, the rain and all that.It's unendurable.
Art knows that we're both living and dying at the same time.It can hold it.
I thought,I can either let this crack my heart open or closed.I turned around and the billion other people on this earth who've lost a person they love-there they all were.I turned around:I just joined you.
Welcome.There were millions of people;I was glad to be with them.We join each other;We're not alone.
Holding human stories up:it's so miraculous.
Everything is shared."
January 18, 2020
I read this in three nights. However, poetry is usually something I read through once then keep the book and refer back to favorite poems and share them with others who might need that poem that moment. These poems are great for we older folks who have been either looking forward with pride and for those nostalgic times when you look back and cry missing your familiar days. This collection has six sections and the poems in each is perfect for each. Insult contains poems that have to do with the first times you look in the mirror or realize suddenly just how old you've become, that sudden shocking rush. The other sections are Injury, Defiance, Dread, Grit, and Grace. I will put this little gem on my favorites shelf to enjoy sporadically through my life.
July 15, 2017
I'm not a huge poetry reader, but I was drawn to this collection by the list of funny contemporary women contributers and the grown-ass women themes of aging and the different ways women cope (or not) with that. The surprising thing about this wasn't how much I liked the poems (I did), but how awesome the editorial intros to each themed chapter were. Tying together different poems is their purpose, I know, but the way they've done it was amusing, insightful and inspirational: "There's a liberating clarity that comes with this kind of defiance [of defying aging]:freed from inane expectations, some women set about becoming their best selves at midlife and beyond..." Hell yeah!
December 2, 2017
This is the first time I read an anthology of poetry straight through from beginning to end, almost as if it were a novel. The authors group the poems into stages of aging, which gives it a sort of chronological order. Their introduction to each section, although occasionally a little twee, had enough truth and humor to make them worthwhile. And as far as I can see, they nailed the stages pretty well. A nice birthday present for myself.
December 26, 2018
I don’t think this was quite my age demographic, but it was enjoyable still. I think the fetishization of youth in the media is a real problem, and it’s good to see people embracing the completely normal and natural processes of aging, especially for women.
May 10, 2019
This collection is fit for women of every age. It talks about how the aging process can make or break a women. Some take it well while others not. This collection also shows how the society's behaviour starts changing around the aging women. The authors showed how this affects the media and entertainment industry.
There is a mix of prose, poetry and quotes and many of those are included by some classical and famous authors. I really enjoyed a few poems but overall this collection didn't left an impact on me.
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There is a mix of prose, poetry and quotes and many of those are included by some classical and famous authors. I really enjoyed a few poems but overall this collection didn't left an impact on me.
Blog | Twitter | Instagram | Pinterest | Facebook | Ko-fi |Amazon
April 5, 2017
This book is the BEST...I this book to be refreshing, honest, hilarious and a delightful look at aging and all its glory, heartache, ups/downs and everything in between. There is something awesome about taking ownership over the aging process and celebrating all the stages, because let's be honest it cannot be stopped! It can be lonely, humbling and outright scary, but this book is a gift of poems that helps us find grace. humor and joy in growing older! A must for ALL women!!!
April 24, 2017
This poetry collection was humorous, insightful, thought-provoking, and refreshing. It encourages us to not approach aging with dread and fear, but to approach it with grace and dignity. The drawbacks of aging are met with humor and the benefits of increasing wisdom and life experiences are focused on. As a woman in my late 30s I read this book hoping that I would be able to relate to it. I was so happy I did! I especially agreed with the idea that we should embrace the aging process, because the alternative of not growing older is definitely not a better option.
* I received a digital copy of this title from Netgalley in exchange for an honest review.
* I received a digital copy of this title from Netgalley in exchange for an honest review.
April 27, 2017
This book is full of soft healing poetry, and some of the descriptions felt like the author was talking directly to me. I found some parts of the book healing while other parts made me laugh. I read this book in one day - April 13th.
Based on a five-star rating, I give it five stars!
1) Buy from the author in the future? Yes
2) Did it keep me intrigued? Yes
3) Story line adventurous, mysterious, and believable? Yes
4) Would I recommend to a family member/friend? Yes
5) Did my idea of the book based on the cover remain the same after I read the book? Yes. The candles make me think of birthdays while the title makes me question when did I get this old?
Based on a five-star rating, I give it five stars!
1) Buy from the author in the future? Yes
2) Did it keep me intrigued? Yes
3) Story line adventurous, mysterious, and believable? Yes
4) Would I recommend to a family member/friend? Yes
5) Did my idea of the book based on the cover remain the same after I read the book? Yes. The candles make me think of birthdays while the title makes me question when did I get this old?
April 29, 2017
I received a free ARC from NetGalley in exchange for an impartial review.
How many ways can I say fabulous? How Did This Happen? strikes to very heart of what it is like to be female and growing older. The anthology of poems is divided into sections depicting various states of aging:
Insult (When You Don't Recognize Yourself in the Mirror);
Injury (When You Realize Aging Is a Thing);
Defiance (When You Think You Can Make It All Go Away);
Dread (When You Realize You Can't Even);
Grit (When You Find A Way To Live With Yourself); and
Grace (When You Find A Way To Live In The World).
Compilers Mary Esselman and Elizabeth Ash Velez introduce each section with a mixture of hilarity and woe. My only complaint here is that sometimes they provide too much detail on some of the poems; consequently, I saw their interpretations instead of discovering my own. The compilers provide a wonderful selection of poems, some familiar and some unexpected new discoveries. Poets were both male and female and ranged from the ancient Greeks to Shakespeare, Emily Dickinson to 21st century comediennes. Topics include mammograms, aching bodies, gynecological visits, and muffin top waistlines. There isn't a poem that is misplaced or out-of-sorts; each poem reflects an image of what it feels like, tastes like, and hurts like to get older.
I have a confession here. As an avid reader (32 so far in 2017), I rarely buy books. I spent my professional life in a library and loved it. Downloadable e-books through my public library means I don't even have to get out of my jammies to find some new titles. How Did This Happen? is a title I will buy for friends and for myself. This wonderful collection of poems proves we are not alone in this nightmare/fantastic journey.
Now, I have to go buy a tool to make it easier for my crony, old-lady hands to open jars!
How many ways can I say fabulous? How Did This Happen? strikes to very heart of what it is like to be female and growing older. The anthology of poems is divided into sections depicting various states of aging:
Insult (When You Don't Recognize Yourself in the Mirror);
Injury (When You Realize Aging Is a Thing);
Defiance (When You Think You Can Make It All Go Away);
Dread (When You Realize You Can't Even);
Grit (When You Find A Way To Live With Yourself); and
Grace (When You Find A Way To Live In The World).
Compilers Mary Esselman and Elizabeth Ash Velez introduce each section with a mixture of hilarity and woe. My only complaint here is that sometimes they provide too much detail on some of the poems; consequently, I saw their interpretations instead of discovering my own. The compilers provide a wonderful selection of poems, some familiar and some unexpected new discoveries. Poets were both male and female and ranged from the ancient Greeks to Shakespeare, Emily Dickinson to 21st century comediennes. Topics include mammograms, aching bodies, gynecological visits, and muffin top waistlines. There isn't a poem that is misplaced or out-of-sorts; each poem reflects an image of what it feels like, tastes like, and hurts like to get older.
I have a confession here. As an avid reader (32 so far in 2017), I rarely buy books. I spent my professional life in a library and loved it. Downloadable e-books through my public library means I don't even have to get out of my jammies to find some new titles. How Did This Happen? is a title I will buy for friends and for myself. This wonderful collection of poems proves we are not alone in this nightmare/fantastic journey.
Now, I have to go buy a tool to make it easier for my crony, old-lady hands to open jars!
Displaying 1 - 15 of 16 reviews