Swimming with Elephants: My Unexpected Pilgrimage from Physician to Healer

by Sarah Bamford Seidelmann

After two decades in the study and practice of medicine, Sarah Seidelmann took a three month sabbatical to search for a way to feel good again. Having witnessed human suffering early in her career and within her own family, she longed for a way to address more than just the physical needs of her patients and to live in a lighter, more conscious way.

Swimming with Elephants tells the eccentric, sometimes poignant, and occasionally hilarious experience of a working mother undergoing a bewildering vocational shift from physician to shamanic healer. During that tumultuous period of answering her call, Sarah met an elephant who would become an important spirit companion on her journey, had bones thrown for her by a shaman in South Africa, and traveled to India for an ancient Hindu pilgrimage, where she received the blessing she had been longing for. Ultimately, she discovered an entirely different way of healing, one that she had always aspired to, and that enabled her to help those who are suffering.

Editorial Reviews
Review
"This is an exceedingly vulnerable, beautifully written book and the most genuine spiritual memoir I have ever read. It is also--in many hilarious moments--laugh out loud funny." --Maria Bamford, Comedian and star of Netflix Original Series Lady Dynamite

"I LOVED THIS BOOK. Sarah takes us on an intimate tour of the hero's journey. She's a brilliant storyteller...making sense of the baffling journey from the ordinary world into the mystical and back again. I didn't want it to end." --MeiMei Fox, New York Times bestselling author

"A fascinating, amusing, and wise account of how someone born with a shaman's predilections, raised in a rationalist culture, finds her way back to her true self.” --Martha Beck, New York Times bestselling author of Expecting Adam

"Sarah Bamford Seidelmann has amassed heaps of wisdom in her courageous leap from the safe realm of medical science into the unknown -- the world of spirit. In this incredibly honest and compassionate memoir, you feel as though you're soaking in her courage and wisdom on every page. Even better, you do so laughing." --Jaimal Yogis, author of Saltwater Buddha and The Fear Project

"From the lakes of Minnesota to the Ganges River in India, Sarah Seidelmann's transformative journey from MD to shamanic healer is a refreshingly honest and very funny tale of spiritual growth." --Matt Adrian, author of The Guide to Troubled Birds

About the Author
Sarah Bamford Seidelmann is a fourth-generation physician turned shamanic healer and life coach, who deeply enjoys shenanigans. She’s a frequent guest blogger at Maria Shriver’s site for Architects of Change and has led sold-out retreats combining surfing and shamanism in Hawaii and a sacred pachydermal pilgrimage to Thailand. She loves to help others find their own “feel good” so they can live courageously and enthusiastically. Visit Sarah at followyourfeelgood.com.

Genres: Nonfiction, Memoir, Spirituality, Biography Memoir

304 pages, Paperback

Published October 1, 2017

About the author

Sarah Bamford Seidelmann MD is a 4th generation physician, accomplished writer, shamanic healer, artist, and coach. Her six books have all been instant Amazon best-sellers. Her What the Walrus Knows app for iOS has users in 65 countries. For twenty years, Sarah was a board-certified pathologist (what she calls a “disease hunter”). After decades of seeking out illness, she grew curious about what creates health. Through her own investigation and with the help of her spiritual ally, Alice, an elephant in spirit form, she discovered that creative self-expression is fundamental to our vitality and health. Sarah specializes in helping others foster a connection to spirit by spending time in nature and observing the birds and animals. Sarah has been an instructor and curriculum creator for Martha Beck’s Wayfinder Life Coach Training and an official contributor for Maria Shriver’s Architects of Change. Sarah is currently making art and preparing to publish her seventh book: a richly illustrated and entertaining volume about boundaries for helpers + healers. She co-leads a creative community called SHINE for writers and artists who are committed to showing up for their work, no matter what.

Reviews

[christa]

Where to begin. Where. To. Begin. This memoir chronicles Seidelmann’s growing discontent as a pathologist, and the route she takes to become a shamanic healer -- while following words of wisdom from an otherworldly cast of animals like Mama Bear and Alice, a festively dressed elephant. She meets them while she’s in a trance-like state that she achieves by listening to shamanic drumming on her headphones, but she can find rocks to talk to her in the woods, too.
I love this book. It’s full of great ideas about reinvention, bravery, and chasing happiness and fulfillment. It’s also quirky, earnest, honest. Plus, if you ever meet Seidelmann, you’ll swear the sun shines directly onto her face at all times.

[Christie]

I'll start with what I liked. I loved the part near the end of the book about the author's time in India. It was descriptive, it was compelling, and it made me want to pack right up and head to India immediately, or even better, next time Kumbh Mela is held. Also, the author seems like a kind person, who really cares. But I just couldn't connect with her story on some fundamental level. Maybe I just don't believe, or maybe her ability to take time off and pay thousands of dollars to travel and attend conferences or pilgrimages is too far from my reality.

[Heidi]

I read about her relationship with her father, her medical training, her marriage, her kids, her husband, her wealth, her indecision about being a pathologist, working part-time, her ADD, her trip to Africa, and then I just didn’t care about her life anymore. I wish the book started where I abandoned it because I may have enjoyed it more.

[Karen Stubenvoll]

Amazing book! I was captivated by Sarah’s story — couldn’t put it down! A brave & honest memoir.

[Jessica]

I loved this book! I have been on my spiritual path for some time now but have never really fully explored the world of shamanism. I loved Sarah's story about fearlessly following her heart and intuition into a new path, and I learned so much about animal totems and spiritual journeying along the way. I had always kind of looked up animal symbolism for a while now but I had no idea how in depth this practice really was or how connected these instincts were to a true, magical way of living.

I'd really recommend this book to anyone else looking to radically shift their lives towards their true path and curious about taking their spiritual practice to new, deeper levels.

[Sydney]

Not really what I expected, but still a nice read. The author was very descriptive and I was able to picture the smallest details in her writing.

[Bernard]

Enjoyed the parts about her travels in South East Asia, but other than that it was too spiritual for me. I think I’ll stick with medicine..

[Sarah]

I agree with many of the other reviews - perhaps if the author had summarized the first 70% of the book and picked it up from there I may have found it more compelling.

But as I can only judge what I read, here's what I thought:

"This sounds like a bored, rich woman looking for solutions to a bunch of life decisions that aren't working out the way she hoped."

Now, I applaud her compassion. I applaud her draw, zeal and search for spirituality, but come on....

How many of us can go to India, swim with elephants, and go on all the other extensive, expensive and zany adventures she has enjoyed? Like.......none of us. Some people have to find their spirituality and guidance and calling in the midst of the normal, mundane and every day, and I'd probably relate to them a whole lot more for finding wisdom in the nitty, gritty than I did with this author.

And I didn't walk away feeling like she got good value for her time and money; many of her experiences sounded more like temporary religious ecstasy that ultimately would fade over time rather than lasting, foundation building, life lessons. She may have gotten something out of them, but I did not.

On top of the fact that so much of it was difficult to relate to, she just wasn't a very good writer. I'm sorry. I said it. The issue wasn't the quality of the writing, it was the lack of follow through. There were several strong build ups in the storytelling that ultimately went nowhere at all. There was no payoff to 90% of the words a reader has to plow through. Was that the author's fault or the editor's? Not sure, but this could have been so much better than it was.

I truly only finished reading to so that I could give a fair review. For future readers, I advise skipping it.

[Marcee]

Meh. I read this because friends of mine are mentioned (and were on this trip); I wanted to read the parts about Nathan-the-leader (not a fan of this person in real life, so loved these bits). Still, I was bothered by a lot of it. There is a LOT of privilege here, things that really feel like cultural appropriation AND I am very bugged by her choosing to get a "mantra initiation" because she wanted a mantra given to her, while at the same time she was constantly critical of the lineage that she was getting initiated into to get her mantra. There are DEFINITELY issues, and I have the same complaints about the side of the tradition she is describing, but there is a whole other side/group that she seems to be unaware of. With her being so "spiritual" and "in tune", it didn't feel like she put much thought or spiritual insight into being initiated into this tradition and that just feels WRONG.

Also, I ended up with a used copy of the not-for-sale proof which actually published names and personal info about people she apparently hadn't gotten permission to use, because in the final book this was changed as well. This also made me quite uncomfortable.

[Vanessa Angelina]

Somewhat entertaining. She’s a good writer and storyteller. I don’t identify with anything she’s written, though. All the “spirit” stuff and the visions and all that. Seems to me that it’s just really good imagination, combined with just another Westerner on a cultural appropriation path. 🤷🏻‍♀️Also, I hated that she decided to ride an elephant in Thailand despite knowing the abuse they subject these animals too because her “spirit animal” told her that “this” ride would be a blessing. And then she goes on to say that the metal chains around the elephant’s neck symbolises all our suffering. Um. What? So, a chain that was placed on an animal’s neck by a human represents our “suffering”? Something this animal didn’t choose? Not very “healing” and “spiritual” on her part, if I must say so myself. Sounds like an excuse she told herself to justify her riding this animal. Like I said. Overall, a semi-entertaining read but I probably should have been high myself while reading it. Maybe then I’d be “open to receiving the spirits’ awakening”.

[Amy Doeun]

I had the privilege of hearing Sarah read and couldn't wait to start reading her book. Her funny, quirky personality shines in this book where she shares some very intimate questions and moments as she works to heal herself first and the world.

[Tanya]

Unfortunately, this book reads like a first draft. Run-on sentences, spelling errors, punctuation problems galore. I love books on this subject matter, but found this one impossible to read, because it seems to have not been proofread or edited for structure, focus and basic grammar.

[Sophie]

I have very much enjoyed Sarah's story of transformation, it is very inspiring and informative to me, as I also delve into the depths of this life and connect more with my inner being and intuition. Thank you for inspiring me on my own journey Sarah.

[Quinn Horvath]

Interesting book. Sarah really hit her stride when we made it to India.

[Heidi Barr]

A lovely read that inspired me to remember what's truly important, and to continue to work toward it. Refreshing and funny.

[Kristina Schwartz]

Fascinating. Enjoyed learning through Sarah and was encouraged to look at things with new perspective.

[Brenda]

lines from the book that I liked:

p.98: when worried: "just get your own feel good on and have fun!"

p.99: when too serious: "Heyoka is the sacred clown contrarian of the Lakota people of the Great Plains of North America who know how to restore balance by creating mayhem, violating taboos, and acting out or saying things considered unthinkable by society."

p. 109: "if you complain to a shaman or medicine person of being disheartened, dispirited, or depressed, they would ask one of four questions: ....When did you stop being enchanted by stories? When did you stop finding comfort in the sweet territory of silence?"

I enjoyed the quotations at the beginning of each chapter...and found it interesting and delightful that the author used so many from children's literature! This one on p. 123:
"Surely it is cruel to cut down a very fine tree! Each dull, dead thud of the axe hurts the little green fairy that lives in its heart. Beatrix Potter, The Fairy Caravan"

...and another on the next page, by Madeline L'Engle in "A Wrinkle in Time": "I don't understand it any more than you do, but one thing I've learned is that you don't have to understand things for them to be."

p. 261: on mothers leaving their children for a while: " I want to broadcast this on a megaphone to every mother or person who feels tied down by their circumstances or otherwise reluctant to leave their post for an adventure: Go! Seize your adventures! Everyone will benefit!"

p. 267: "Toward calm and shady places I am walking on the earth." Anishinabe/Ojibway song

[Lenny Husen]

The Goodreads rating of 3.72 is fair. I chose this book based on the fact that our family are big fans of the author's sister, Maria Bamford, who is a super funny, smart, quirky comedian.
I am a physician so understood Sarah's career arc--even if I didn't agree with it entirely--I thought she was cool for choosing an off-beat (wacky) new career of being a Shaman and Animal Spirit Guide--it seems Sarah is someone who is successful at everything she tries (Medical School, Pathology, Marriage and Motherhood, Shamanism, Writing).
This is a Memoir, and once again (see my review of Slow Medicine)--this is a "Let me tell you the Secret to My Success" type of Memoir and isn't for me. I prefer the "Let me tell you why I am lucky to be alive and how I overcame something" type of Memoir. I am always going to deduct points for the former and round up for the latter.
( a third type of Memoir is the "I am famous and don't you wish you knew me personally" which totally depends on the writing quality and what they overcame.)

Audio book --I didn't care for the narrator--wish Sarah Seidelmann had narrated her own book. But my husband thought the narrator was totally fine.

Bottom line: if you REALLY like Maria Bamford, listen/read this book.

[Ginger Churchill]

I truly struggled with this book. It needed a few more good rounds of editing/drafting. The first part seemed tacked on with build ups that felt important leading abruptly to nowhere—just completely dropped. The last part included minutiae such as a souvenir shopping list that just didn’t need to be there. The tense changing from past (first half of book) to present (last half) was jarring. I also struggled with much of the writer’s philosophy, not of spirituality since it’s obvious what a reader is in for there, but the casually ungrateful wealth (how will we ever survive on just one doctor’s salary?), the patriarchal support (my husband has the same job as me but I cook and raise kids and work and don’t know why I’m so tired), the inadvertent racism (writing out a Hispanic accent phonetically ala Mark Twain)…it was a lot. There’s more, but I’ve rambled enough already. Other reviews said it got better as it went. So I kept reading. I do not agree.

[Michael Kerr]

Reviews for this one tend to be hot or cold. This might be because the book is divided into a kind of before and after. The first part covers Seidelmann's early training, career development, and family--a rather conventional memoir. The second half relates her departure from these norms as she explores and embraces a shamanic approach to healing (as opposed to a medical one). Some readers seem to abandon the text before the shift, and others seem to feel shortchanged that the book doesn't focus completely on the spiritual. Whatev. This is a pretty interesting exploration of a woman's evolution in a direction the planet may well need us to adopt. God knows doing the same thing and expecting a different outcome isn't working for us.

[Elizabeth]

I have been fortunate to hear Sarah speak. Now I have devoured this book.
Next I want to experience a shamanic healing.
This book is an open, honest account of her journey from the world of western medicine as a doctor to becoming a shamanic healer.
Her family, her stories, experiences, travels, feelings, all woven into a readable account of the transition.

[Carefree Toni]

Hard for the book to live up to the presentation of her journey - complete with the incredible kitchen

Great to hear someone followed their true calling even if it wasn't mainstream and as lucrative as a doctor.

[Noel Larson]

If you are ready to heal and do some hard work to find your path this book will guide and inspire. I highly recommend this book if you feel lost, unmotivated, depressed, what to start something new and are scared and excited. That is where I am at. I was so ready to read this book unexpectedly!

[Megan]

Good story. It's nice reading about people that find their spiritual side and I believe we all harness the power. I like that she found her helpers to be animals and I dig the shaman side of spirituality.

[Julie Zaruba Fountaine]

I could not put this book down. I read the entire book in one weekend. I highly recommend Sarah's book. This book is inspiring, transformative, and authentic. A good read. I can't wait for her next book to come out!

[Alana]

Wasn’t my cup of tea but thought I’d try something different as I’ve been becoming more spiritual and into existentialism. I do find her memoir unique and interesting and some lovely quotes that did resonate with me

[Lois]

it's about a physian who takes a whole new direction in healing. learned about holy places in India , customs and the work of a shaman.

[Pamela]

not finishing this book - stopped on page 167.
just not interested in the topic and don't love the writing. The description sounded great, it was a book club selection but just couldn't get into it

[Marielle]

Didn’t like this memoir most of the way through but found the ending really touching and redeemed the book.

[Visalia Rose]

Loved it!