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130 pages, Hardcover
First published June 29, 1995

She knows that Jordan is here stealing time, has planned and plotted this moment of quiet between them, and she curls her hand around his, lets his hair tickle her face without becoming cross for it. He lies still for a minute or more, and then sits up on an elbow so he can kiss her and look at her face and touch her closed eyes. He whispers, “Happy birthday, Michelle.”
In the shop the chemist is watchful. He does not like the Willow children and thinks them dangerous, delinquent. He asks them what they want and Michelle says, “I want to know why chemists are always old.” She sprays perfume and samplers up and down her arm and in her brother’s face. Jordan retreats outside and leans against the window to wait. He watches the people who pass but drops his gaze if they look back at him.
Although Oliver loves his siblings dearly, he is not yet old enough to consider them friends. He is no loner, and would call himself lonely.
“What you were saying the other day - I’ve been thinking about it - “
”What was I saying?”
”You know, the stuff about kids in a family having favorites … Edward is Speck’s favorite. And Michelle is Jordan’s favorite. Michelle is Dad’s favorite, too. Everyone knows that. He thinks she’s wonderful. He lets her do anything she likes. He never yells at her.”
”Michelle doesn’t like other boys. She only likes Jordan. She’ll tell you to go away, because she’s only ever liked Jordan.”
”Daddy!” she pleads, “there’s nothing - "
”Liar!” he spits. “Don’t you lie to me! Someone says they’ve seen you, out there in the bush, like animals! Animals, Michelle!”
”Don’t throw me out, Daddy, don’t make me leave. It was Jordan, he made me do everything, he made me, it wasn’t my fault, don’t hurt me.”
It is not something they often talk of: they know what they do is said to be wrong and yet certainly it appears to hurt no one. It causes no trouble and no great punishment comes down from the sky to blight them. Griffin hitting Jordan provides the penalty they don’t want but know they probably deserve despite everything they endure, the monotony, the seclusion, the occasional misery of the farm. Denied the chance to do so as children, they are now both incapable of making outside friends: their closeness brings them solace and companionship and seems only just.
She leans her weight on his chest and he smells her: she always smells nice to him, like something brand new. He sighs but there is nothing wrong. No other body could be as harmonious to him as Michelle’s, no one would ever fold around him so comfortably, none could wrap him so perfectly, for Shelly and he are made alike.