That’s Your Lot

by Limmy

This is Limmy’s second book.

It’s a whole load of new, odd, and hilariously grim short stories.

Tom is in a soft play with his daughters. He’s bored. He’s so bored he can move things with his mind.

A man fills up a mate’s biscuit tin without ever telling him, to see what happens.

Maggie’s boyfriend Iain bought a curtain. It keeps attacking them. She wants it out the house.

A man is sitting in his wheelie bin at two in the morning, and he wants to tell you why.

Kenny’s mate Scott is suicidal and ridden with guilt. Kenny takes him on holiday to Benidorm. It’ll be some laugh.

Praise for Daft Wee

‘The comedy book of the year.’ - Time Out

‘Funny, peculiar and original.’ - Guardian

‘Didn't realise pieces of paper with no pictures on could be so funny. I mean I was cryin’ all day yesterday into this book. Hilarious’ - Someone on Amazon

Genres: Short Stories, Fiction, Comedy, Humor, Audiobook, Scotland, Ebooks

321 pages, Kindle Edition

First published May 4, 2017

About the author

Brian "Limmy" Limond is a Scottish comedian, actor, and web developer. He first became known for his website and blog. In late 2006, his daily podcast Limmy's World of Glasgow received interest from the mainstream British media. In early 2010, Limond achieved success with his BBC sketch show series Limmy's Show. He is also a prolific user of the social networking applications Twitter, YouTube and Vine.

Reviews

[Paul O’Neill · Rating 2 out of 5]

Not nearly as good as his first book, ‘Daft Wee Stories’.

A few chuckle worthy stories, specially the end one.

[Ross Maclean · Rating 5 out of 5]

The final story, Benidorm, alone is a masterpiece of dark comic storytelling. Longer and less throwaway than the tales of Daft Wee Stories, this collection showcases someone who understands modern anxieties and relays them with an asphyxiating streak of subversion and occasional pathos. They’re also mad as fuck.

[Leo Robertson · Rating 3 out of 5]

I hope I get to introduce some people on this site to Limmy!

He's a Glaswegian comedian who's been entertaining me for over a decade now. Here are seriously just a handful of clips I thought of off the top of my head:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PF0q9...
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6Yzya...
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HQa_v...
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XMZtd...
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=im9VF...
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T_-Dg...
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jfect...
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3A8ya...
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3z-a5...

Not to mention his podcast, back when podcasts were barely a thing, and his TV show!

As for this book. I haven't read the first one, which I hear is even better, so, looking forward to that, but anyway—it passes my favourite auteur test, in that I couldn't help but read it in his voice. The stories read very much like short sketches from his show—and I always saw at least one of the characters as Limmy himself, or imagined him the narrator standing in the scene telling me what was going on. Though if I didn't know his voice, I don't know that the stories themselves would have conveyed the right tone.

Also having seen the show, I was familiar with his typical settings and actors for characters, so it was all easy to picture in that respect—though not that the writing itself gives you much to go on.

I can't imagine that these books were written for people who weren't already fans, which is fine—but I can't imagine them, on their own back, winning over many new fans. (It's weird to write about a Limmy book for a Goodreads audience who, unlike a lot of published comedians, see writing as the best medium, and not the one where all the B-sides go.)

Still, Limmy fans will have much to enjoy of his unique, surreal and quintessentially Glaswegian style of humour (it's so pervasively Glaswegian that, as I write this, I can almost imagine him, or some classmate I once knew, reading this review and laughing at me for any sign of pretention -_-)

If you weren't a Limmy fan already, I hope the above clips have enticed you to investigate the podcast and TV show, and then you'd be ready for these books. But they would be last on the list.

[Keen Reader · Rating 2 out of 5]

KILL JESTER!

I mind first coming across Limmy’s website back in 2004 through a mate. I was impressed by the quality, accuracy and random humour of his material, I’ve shown it to people from other parts of the world who found it hilarious too, so it shows that although its very Glasgow-centric, much of it is still universally relatable. He continues to make some great sketches and captures the west of Scotland day to day as well as anyone.

YES OR NO?

Those familiar with his work, will know what to expect, and these are no exception, these are dark, twisted tales riddled with paranoia, violence and neurosis. Sometimes relatable and often awful characters slouch, moan, worry and create chaos in here. Far too many of these are just a bit too long, and although there’s the occasional humour or surprise tucked away within some, the quality of the actual stories tends to be pretty poor and rarely worth it. There are some good ones in the mix, but unfortunately they are far outweighed by the mediocre, forgettable and the very poor.

IT IS FAE BLUE THOUGH…

[Brian Hamilton · Rating 4 out of 5]

Ahh, Limmy, he is the boy. I stumbled into his surreal Weedgie world years ago when I started getting into podcasts. His mad characters had me in stitches.

The leap to a TV show was, at times, a bit hit or miss but worth the watch.

I think what makes Limmy appeal to me so much is that his comedy is steeped in Glasgow aphorisms and he holds the joke a few seconds too long, which makes the reader/viewer uncomfortable. For me this just adds to the humour.

Expect here a bunch of quick read short stories which range from the bizarre to the, well, weird. First person rants from a man hiding in his wheely bin to a psychotic pair of curtains that nightly beat up their owners (who can't throw them out because they look nice and were very expensive).

The writing is generally very slick, there is the odd clunky moment but, on the whole, Limmy makes the transition from writing for TV to writing hard fiction without issue.

Limmy is one of these guys you either find funny as hell or you think he is just weird and daft. I'm in the former camp.

To see if you like his shtick it might be worth checking out youtube for sketches of his character 'Dee-Dee.' Watch him and you will get the angle.

I'm smiling typing this, Limmy is a pure bam.

[Kris McCracken · Rating 5 out of 5]

Very (VERY) disturbing at points, yet very, VERY funny. Limmy's tone is probably not for everyone, but if you like your short stories to take a dark look at the mundanity of modern life, it is a shocking, scathing treat.

[Jacob · Rating 5 out of 5]

Genuinely one of the funniest books I've ever read. I love Limmy so much. Great patter.

[Paula Dembeck · Rating 1 out of 5]

Well………..

I am not sure in this case if I failed the writer or the writer failed me.

This little book came beautifully packaged, small enough to put in a purse, a large pocket or a book bag with a completely black cover and white script. Adding to its allure was the single word name of its author, Limmy. It looked interesting.

Brian Limond is known to his fans by that one word and stars in a BBC series which he also produces and directs. I had never heard of him, but he is apparently very successful in Scotland and known for his weird sense of humour.

The book contains twenty-nine very short stories all about five to seven pages each. Most are focused on a very anxious and ill at ease young man negotiating his way in the world, largely without success. The stories start out well but then end abruptly or land with a thud, leaving the reader wondering if they missed the last turn in the road. Some stories just go nowhere at all, making the reader wonder if they left out a page.

Limmy’s style of writing is starkly simple with little dialogue. Many of his sentences begin with a noun followed by a verb (e.g. Kenny is suicidal…, Eric was taking pictures………, Iain bought a …, A man is sitting in a …….) making his style sound very much like that used in a young children’s book.

I found the stories crazy and ridiculous, although I know they were meant somehow to be satirical and fun.

Somehow I have missed the boat on this one.
However, the fact that this little book is in print means it has an audience somewhere.

I’m just not in it.

[Andrew Whitton · Rating 4 out of 5]

Been a fan of Limmy since he was on his website then podcasts and tv and onto his first book which was exceptional. This time it is just a good book, a little disappointing after the first. The best story is by far Benidorm with The Curtain and Grammar also highlights. The problem is a lot of the stories don't seem to have a proper ending it's as if right before the ending should be they end and are not funny. It feels a bit like he wrote loads of stories, chose the best for the first book and these are the leftovers or something. The saving point is it's well written, very easy to approach but hard to put down, interesting, different and genuinely hilarious in places with dark humour but just not as funny as the first book and with a lot of 'non' endings.

[David · Rating 4 out of 5]

Look, he's in his own stratosphere, his own league. No one else could create this. No one. I love how you can get so engrossed in his stories for 99% then that last 1% is him yanking the rug and you realise that's the end of the chapter, it's wide open, there's no pay off, and yet that is the pay off. It doesn't make sense, but it's 100% satisfying.

The last few chapters seem to lose steam or maybe it's more like Lemmy-fatigue. I listened to this over 3 days. I didn't read, this was the Audio-book, read by Limmy, highly recommended.

[Alexandra · Rating 4 out of 5]

really should be a 3.5 but because the good parts were so good and because it's limmy, i am rounding up

i liked most of the stories, especially the bin story, ans how weird and mundane and grim they were. however, they got quite repetitive after a while. even though the content was different, the structures of each story were basically the exact same, so it got a bit tedious over time.

they really work when you read them in limmy's voice

[Stephen · Rating 2 out of 5]

The majority of these stories make no sense, even for Limmy. There is every chance he is sitting at home thinking "I can't actually believe they published all those stories" apart from a select few, this was utter sh*te.

[Semi-Colin · Rating 4 out of 5]

Just read this book straight off the back of reading his first book Daft Wee Stories. It’s still got the same bonkers style but this time he doesn’t shy away from some of the stories not being funny or having a punchline ending and they’re great.

Much darker than his first book, the final story Benidorm especially makes your blood boil and filled me with anxiety it was so dark. This book really shows that Limmy can do it all he doesn’t just have to rely on absurd comedy, he’s a brilliant story teller.

[Luke · Rating 4 out of 5]

A perfect encapsulation of the human condition.

[Chrissy Evans · Rating 4 out of 5]

Great book, but you really must get the audio version for full effect.

[Jemma · Rating 4 out of 5]

In his second book of short stories, Limmy continues to take a bizarre, sideways look at modern life. Many of the tales are tinged with melancholy. There are few good chuckles but not as many as his first book, Daft Wee Stories. Still, it's a good one to add to your collection if you're a fan of his work.

[Tim Mccaskey · Rating 4 out of 5]

There were clearly a few stories I liked here better than others (so it wasn't uniformly great), but I love the dark humor and the non-endings in much of the book. I wish I had gotten it on audiobook to get the accent to match the text.

[Productive Procrastinator]

I didn't read the whole collection (only reading 7 stories that either grabbed my interest by their title or which were recommended on this site or others). However, I have to say that as much as I love Limmy (and I must emphasise that I think he is a comedic genius and one of the most effortlessly funny people out there), this did feel like a step-down from the excellent Daft Wee Stories. Yes, the absurdity, dark humour, and originality are still here, but I found that the subtle or overt themes from the aforementioned collection were either absent or repeated from the selection I read, and the prose was much more imprecise: awkward tautologies in subject of words (inadvertent ones that were not meant to capture the fixation a narrator had on something or show their unstable viewpoint), rigid and/or verbose sentence/paragraph styles that hurt the delivery of the comedy sometimes or in distinguishing narrational voices (there is a way, as George Saunders and Limmy himself have demonstrated, to capture an inform/conversational narrational voice but still have it feel precise and controlled), or drawn out exchanges dotted the selection that I read. There also were far fewer thought-provoking observations here as well (which really aided the many feghoots of the first collection still feeling like valuable and enjoyable exercises in futility, as any good fehgoot, like the brilliant "The Size of Sally", should). I would still recommend reading this, but unlike Daft Wee Stories, I wouldn't pay full price for it or buy a digital copy (like I did).

"The Curtain" (or whatever the exact title was) was extremely funny though and felt the least bloated. "Benidorm", whilst slightly overlong, was also very enjoyable and memorable (although in a more morbid sense of being immersed in the POV of a toxic male party boy character whom I unfortunately find much too recognisable), but I did feel that some greater elements of the ennui to party culture could have been mined. "Grammar" is also pretty funny (although, again, I feel like it could have been written in a slightly more precise manner and its dark ending didn't fully work for me since I don't see why such a key detail was never confided in the narrator beforehand). The opening story of "Pavement" also felt like something Kafka would have written and featured an always enticing use of social satire beyond simple humour (as its ending is more horrific and haunting than humorous despite the absurdity of the image).

[Chris Lockhart · Rating 4 out of 5]

Our son and I watched the Limmy show on streaming a couple years ago and we both thought it was great. My wife gave us this book for Christmas a couple years ago, and I've gradually been reading it one story at a time.

It's clear from both the show that Brian "Limmy) Limond struggles with anxiety, particularly social anxiety. He's a likable and relatable character and this book continues on his conversational style of story-telling. The short stories in this collection focus on specific moments in people's lives, often exposing how over-thinking a situation frequently leads to making it worse.

The main characters are generally young men who worry about what other people think of them and their behavior; they frequently engage in damaging internal dialog attempting to avoid conflict and faux pas, when openly communicating with the other person at the start would've prevented catastrophe. The main characters differ from each other, but all share similar difficulties. They have conflicts with neighbors, co-workers, strangers, lovers, spouses.

Sometimes the main character is a bad person (like the longer concluding tale) whose attempts to be good are terribly misguided, but usually they're a nervous good person in what they perceive to be a critical world. Limmy is self-aware enough to find the humor in this conflict between perception and reality.

Frequently laugh-out-loud funny and always engaging, this book forms a coherent whole by offering different perspectives on anxiety in modern society. Most of these stores are pretty good, and a few are truly great. I would recommend this book to people that enjoyed the show, especially those that related to the characters.

3½ stars rounded up to 4.

[Craig White · Rating 5 out of 5]

Sub-Limmynally Grim!
comedian in 'not funny' shocker? so and not so! I burst myself laughing several times during 'daft wee stories', only once here, but this is a far better book! limmy has very skilfully shifted into an area more akin to james kelman's mastery of the minutiae in life, playing on the grassy verge of mental illness issues - homing into characters who overthink things to the nth degree, and with crystal clear logic! oh, and still with daftness in abundance, but a very dark and disturbing daftness! a Glasgow daftness!
much as I enjoy all elements of limmy's canon, I think writing is where his path to excellence will take him. the stories here roll easily off the pages, and are full of original and inventive ideas and situations with unpredictable outcomes - you may be waiting for the punch-line that never comes (or maybe it does), but you will end up pole-axed by where it takes you anyway! as I say, skilled! especially for a second book! wouldn't like to think that's our lot!

[Ross Jamieson · Rating 3 out of 5]

I’m a massive fan of Limmy, must have watched every episode of his show at least twice and find him hilarious on Twitter aswell so after reading ‘Daft Wee Stories’, I was glad to see he had another book.

This book only gets three stars from me because of similar reasons to why I gave ‘Daft Wee Stories’, four. There are some hilarious stories in here, ones that really made me cry with laughter, particularly the one at the end (a lot of people seem to agree judging by the other reviews). But some of the stories really didn’t match the high standards of some of the others so it was disappointing to read a hilarious story and then for the next one to barely put a smile on my face. I’d rather only half the book with the best stories and then it would get a solid five any day.

Like I said with ‘Daft Wee Stories’, this book is only really for someone who is already a Limmy fan or at least familiar with his stuff. I also hope this really isn’t “our lot”.

[Gareth Houghtonio · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book is basically the same set-up as the previous book, Daft Wee Stories. So I'll just copy and paste my review of that book, because it almost fully applies to this book.

"There's no need for how funny this book is. It's loads of daft wee stories. Dark, surreal, bizarre, imaginative... Each story is around five pages long, give or take, and most of them are so ridiculous that you are wondering how the hell they are going to end, only for the last sentence to punch your face with something totally unexpected and hilarious. I laughed loads of times."

The only difference with That's Your Lot is the stories seem to get gradually worse and less funny as the book goes on, except for the final story, Benidorm, which is darkly hilarious to the max.

So despite the slight slump in the middle, I still laughed loads of times and I shall dish out four neutron stars.

[LiamLovesLit · Rating 3 out of 5]

Confession: In an act of manifestation, I read this in October in the hopes that it would result in Limmy being announced as an Off Menu guest for their live shows.

Moving on, That’s Your Lot! I’ve read my fair share of class comedy books as well as some stinkers - compared to any other book genre, there’s nothing quite as bad as a “comedy” book that flatlines in the funny department.

Being a collection of short stories, Limmy can afford to have an anticlimactic story or three. In fact, I’d say it’s a near even split of tales that work and ones that miss the mark. But when they hit - more often than not in a macabre way - it’s up there with his strongest material.

[Ross Thompson · Rating 3 out of 5]

Some more daft wee stories from Limmy. I picked this up as a holiday read when my current fantasy book became too grim for poolside reading. These short stories are all of a similar feel to the first set but to my mind of lesser quality. The stories are generally all someone getting themselves into a ludicrous situation after a series of seemingly logical decisions. None of these quite match up with those in the first book, and some just end without his trademark twisted punchline. The final story, more of a novella, is more like a rejected Irvine Welsh story than his usual, and is really quite an unpleasant read.

[James Wilkinson · Rating 2 out of 5]

Iain had bought a curtain, for his and Maggie’s bedroom. He thought it was just a normal curtain, but it wasn’t. It was alive. It would wake them up during the night, and batter fuck out of them.

Limmy is one of the UK's most brilliant and restless comic minds. His talents have extended from TV sketch comedy in Limmy's Show to improvised stories and game streaming on Twitch, to prank calls, music and even making simple web games themselves. In 2015 he branched out into prose with his first story collection Daft Wee Stories and in 2017 followed it up with That's Your Lot.

Living up to its name, That's Your Lot takes joy in abrupt conclusions, with stories not so much careening to a halt as smashing head-on into their last page, ending with shocking abruptness (even moreso in the audiobook version, where the end of the story can creep up unseen).

Sometimes, as in "Taxi Patter" and "New Life" it works brilliantly, leaving the reader to continue the story in their head, exploring all the horrible (or occasionally wonderful) possibilities that follow. Frequently it doesn't, and feels a bit like Limmy dodging out of the need to have things build to any kind of crescendo or twist. Several of the yarns revolve around a repeated refrain, and often the stories just end with that yet again - albeit often in a context even more desperate, pathetic or mad than what had come before.

That's a bit of a problem, because while Limmy's characterisation is brilliant and his grasp of modern anxieties and obsessions fantastic, his prose is flat and - er, let's say direct. When dealing with some of his madder ideas - like the deranged curtain above, or a tree growing out of a man's shoulder - that dry delivery works brilliantly. When relaying the mundanities of life, however, it comes across as stilted and leaden, and without the promise of a killer twist or punchline on every story, it can feel like a bit of a slog.

Limmy enthusiasts will still find plenty to enjoy here, but the uninitiated should check out his other stuff first.

[George Foster-Morison]

i can't remember where he either posted it or said it but limmy once mentioned at one point in some form that he's not actually that interested in the conventional 'comedy to make you laugh' 'laugh a minute' 'punchline' formula of comedy. this is something i wish i knew when i went into it. if i was calibrated to ingest that's your lot with the right level of absurdity as it was intended i think i would have got a better eye for the content. additionally i think i was too young and didn't have as much of a handle on irony and absurdist humour that i do now. might reread if i have a spare week

[Vinny Vince · Rating 3 out of 5]

3 and 1/2 stars
Some of these are really funny and deep and often quite sad!
Others I actually found to be very boring and didn't have much depth at all. Most of the follow the same formula of a male protagonist overthinking something, resulting in chaos and a funny twist. However, some had a different style and I found these were usually the better ones because they were much less dull and repetitive than the others.
I would particularly recommend Porridge, Suzie Spunkstain, and the longest one, Benidorm if you want to dip in and out.
Nothing special, but some are really good.

[Inge · Rating 3 out of 5]

This was… fine? Some stories were really funny or really dark, but others were very predictable and boring. I loved the porridge story, and as someone who bikes without a helmet whilst wearing earphones I’ll now be cautious of flying objects being thrown my way, but I skipped other stories because they simply weren’t interesting. The observations about people were the best part about this I think, like the office story with meetings and clients. But even those gradually became predictable once I got to know Limmy’s writing style.

[Ailsa · Rating 2 out of 5]

I confess I gave up on this about halfway through, but in a short story collection I think that's enough to get the gist.

I get Limmy's humour and I like it a lot of the time, it's weird and dark and a bit subversive and I understand that the fact that nothing happens in half of the stories is basically the whole point... but I still didn't like the majority of them. Maybe the audiobook would be better, but the delivery of the short stories in written form didn't work for me.

[Lee Peckover · Rating 4 out of 5]

Another collection of short, darkly humorous stories by Limmy. These are definitely darker than 'Daft Wee Stories' and I think some of the humour is lost along the way. The final story in the collection (by far the longest) is a perfect example of dark humour verging on becoming too depressing to raise a smile. I still enjoyed this collection but I would find it far more difficult to recommend to other readers than the far more accessible 'Daft Wee Stories' collection.