The Dictionary of Corporate Bullshit: An A to Z Lexicon of Empty, Enraging, and Just Plain Stupid Office Talk

by Lois Beckwith

This caustically funny Webster’s of the workplace cuts to the true meaning of the inane argot spouted in cubicles and conference rooms across the land.

It’s time to face the We live in the Golden Age of Bullshit. And as anyone who has ever worked in an office knows, the corporate world is a veritable sea of B.S.—and we are all drowning in it.
 
Thank God for Lois Beckwith, an actual human being with the courage and moral fiber to cut through the crap (so to speak) and give us citizens of the working world the lowdown on what all this corporate lingua franca  actually  means. Breathe easy.  The Dictionary of Corporate Bullshit  will make your job a whole lot easier, telling you how to get ahead ( kissing ass , playing  golf ), avoid annoying colleagues (use  caller ID ), and ride the elevator without ruining your career (if you  gossip , use pronouns, and  never  talk to the  CEO ).
 
If you have ever wondered what a  mindshare  is (some kind of drug?), puzzled over the meaning of words like  impactful  or  incentivize  (here’s a   those are not actual words ), or been faced with a glassy-eyed zombie of a coworker singing the praises of  synergy , then  The Dictionary of Corporate Bullshit   is for you! Forget what you learned in  Bschool —this handy reference guide will teach you everything you need to know about the empty, enraging, and just plain stupid gobbledygook that masquerades as “communication” in the working world.

Genres: Business, Reference, Humor, Nonfiction

193 pages, Paperback

First published February 14, 2006

About the author

Lois Beckwith is a corporate communications executive at a major media company in New York City.

Reviews

[Angshuman Chatterjee · Rating 5 out of 5]

To quote Sheldon Cooper, "It's funny, because it's true."

[Mark Singer · Rating 4 out of 5]

Essential bathroom reading for those who hate working in a cube farm.

[Annika Hanson · Rating 1 out of 5]

It literally is a dictionary. Those are not fun to read. "At the end of the day", you do realize how much "corporate bullshit" we've absentmindedly adopted into our choice of words. I consider corporate speak to be a language downgrade, not anything to be admired.

[Stephanie · Rating 5 out of 5]

We all know someone who talks like this.

[Pouya Kary · Rating 3 out of 5]

Fun but also sadly useful in everyday corporate stuff

[Cumberland BlueDevil · Rating 1 out of 5]

I didn't think this book was funny. Like any vocabulary to communicate, some corporate communications can be bullshitty but that alone doesn't define the entire vocabulary. Calling torture 'aggressive interviewing' can be bullshit, but doesn't make the entire war on terror vocabulary bullshit.

Language is means to communicate. As long as the purpose is being served, why complain. This book is so much anger and devoid of ideas, I wondered about this book's near zero contribution to the subject.

Having grown up in a socialist wannabe state, this book eerily similar to Soviet anti-capitalist propaganda I used to read and roll my eyes. Thanks for reviving childhood memories, Mr author.

[Jinal Shah (If I Were Marketing) · Rating 5 out of 5]

As marketers, we often create communication for B2B customers. This book is a good reference of what NOT to say in the communication. It is a witty, sarcastic take on how corporate communication is convoluted, jargony and unnecessarily difficult. The best marketing is that which even a kid can understand. So steer clear of the terms mentioned in the book and similar and be simple and straightforward to have maximum impact in your marketing communication and campaigns.

[Marcus · Rating 3 out of 5]

This book is sometimes funny, sometimes not. For some reason, I was hoping for more. It is okay, but I had to abandon it while I was still in the C's. It is a dictionary, after all, and not very exciting to read cover to cover. It would make good bathroom or coffee table reading.

[Tina Meyer · Rating 4 out of 5]

Funny look at corporate language and what it really means.

[Bethany · Rating 3 out of 5]

.