Worth the Wrestle

by Sheri Dew

Why can’t I seem to conquer weaknesses that plague me?” “How do I know if I’m receiving revelation?” “Will the Lord forgive me after what I’ve done?” “Why can’t we seem to get ahead financially even though we faithfully pay our tithing?” “What if the Church’s position on gay marriage bothers me?” Those are just a handful of the countless questions Sheri Dew has heard people ask over the years. “May I answer these questions,” she writes, “and any questions you may have, by posing a different Are you willing to engage in the wrestle? In an ongoing spiritual wrestle? ” In Worth the Wrestle, Sheri examines the process of asking good questions—whether those questions be doctrinal, procedural, historical, or intensely personal—and learning how to get answers. She demonstrates how to live by faith while seeking greater light and knowledge. And she testifies of principles that are worth wrestling for and of understanding that can be gained in no other way.

Genres: Religion, Nonfiction, Lds, Church, Inspirational, Spirituality, Audiobook

88 pages, Kindle Edition

Published May 1, 2017

About the author

Sheri Dew graduated from Brigham Young University. She served as second counselor in the general Relief Society of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints from 1997 to 2002. In March 2003 the White House appointed her a member of the U.S. Delegation to the Commission on the Status of Women at the United Nations. In 2002, Sheri Dew became president and CEO of Deseret Book Company.

Reviews

[Heidi · Rating 5 out of 5]

Questions about life and about God are common to all of us. I know I have many of my own. Maybe that's why I found this book perfect for me. I have a lot in common with Sister Dew, being still single at an age long past when I'd hoped to be married. And I still have plenty of questions about it. I really appreciated the candor with which the author explains the importance of being willing to search for answers, to 'wrestle' for answers so to speak. The Lord wants us to invest ourselves in finding answers to our questions, in a matter of speaking, He wants us to demonstrate that we care enough for an answer to put forth the effort to get one. Using personal experiences, scriptures and scripture stories, as well as quotes from LDS general authorities (that as members we consider to be prophets, seers, and revelators) showing the need to really invest ourselves in finding answers. Asking questions can lead to answers when they are asked from a position of faith rather than doubt, believing that God can and will lead us to the answers in His own time and way. In fact, Sister Dew suggests some really good questions for readers to start with. The part I especially related to was the chapter on receiving answers, where the author suggests asking the Lord to show us how we as individuals perceive His responses.

For those who wonder if it's okay to have questions about the LDS church (The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints), its policies, doctrines, and practices, as well as questions about the Lord Himself, I highly recommend this book. I found the book both informative and inspiring, and a powerful reminder that the Lord wants us to learn, He doesn't leave us comfortless, and He will answer our questions if we find the courage and persistence to ask. He will even give us the right questions to ask if we feel lost. I also agreed with Sister Dew's point that once we've received answers, it's important to then stand as a witness for those things that we have learned. A wonderful read that I loved and will undoubtedly read again.

[Heather · Rating 3 out of 5]

For such a short book, this one took me way too long to read. I don't know, it was just okay for me. I really liked the first couple chapters, but I was disappointed that the book didn't really delve much deeper after that. 'Worth the Wrestle' had lots of great points in it, but it felt more like a talk than a book. It sort of just scratches the surface. For those who are struggling with hard questions, doubts, and uncertainty in terms of faith and the Church, I'd recommend Terryl and Fiona Givens's 'The Crucible of Doubt' instead.

[Shauna · Rating 5 out of 5]

WOW! This book is AMAZING!
Everyone should read this!
Got questions? That's OKAY!
Sometimes you just need to wrestle for the answers--
ABSOLUTELY A WONDERFUL BOOK!

[Amy · Rating 4 out of 5]

"It is much easier to sow doubt than to build faith."

I appreciated the perspective of this book. As I finish it, a thought resonates with me. Sheri Dew mentions an interview she had with Randall Wallace, who wrote the screenplay to Braveheart and has also been part of writing or producing many other movies including Hacksaw Ridge, We Were Soldiers, and Pearl Harbor. A believer in Christ, he isn't shy about professing it.

"When I asked why he had produced and written so many movies about war, his answer reinforced the rest of his story: 'I don't think of them as war movies,' he said. 'I write love stories. I want to know what a man or woman loves enough to fight for.'"

In a world that is so charged on access to information and expressing oneself, it feels depleted of faith and acceptance of theism -- express anything you want to -- unless it's a belief in God -- in which case -- shut up -- it's not valid. It's becoming increasingly more difficult to have morals, religious affiliation or not, and there is so much pressure to doubt the existence of God. It's survival of the fittest; every man for himself using his own strength. God has no part in me, I am amazing because I worked hard, and I did this, and I did that...

I've had my fair share of questions (one could say 'doubts') about faith, my religion, and my belief in God. As an adult, nobody is waking me up for church Sunday morning, and my mom and dad don't come to my apartment to say bedtime prayers with me. I've had to examine, reexamine, and crossexamine what I believe and what I don't. Life is too short to not be confident about how I fill my life, my time.

Randall Wallace's comment, when I read it, and as I ponder it, reminds me that one thing I will always fight for is my belief that Jesus Christ, the Son of a living God, died, was buried, and rose again on the third day, and ascended into heaven. This belief leads me to so much more, but that truth is imprinted on my heart. I love Him enough to fight for Him.

Frankly, sometimes it's hard to hold on to this love. When life is particularly tough, and my depression is in full destruction mode, it's difficult to believe there is a loving God. But I've had too many positive moments in my life as a result of this belief, that I cannot deny them, or who espouses them.

A belief in God is not for the faint of heart. It's easier not to believe when global information is available at the click of a button, the swipe of a finger, the command of a virtual assistant.

But, you know? To me, believing in Christ is worth the wrestle.

Reading this book reminded me why I keep stepping on the mat -- facing challenges bigger and scarier, quicker and stronger. I face them because I know if I step up, all that I've done in practice will be enough. I trust my coach. There may be some matches I lose, but I don't lose them in vain. I take those matches and I evaluate how my opponent wrestled with me. Where did he find my weak spots? What can I do in practice to strengthen that area so next time I'm not taken down? When did I lose focus on hearing and listening to my coach? How can I tune my ears to listen more carefully? I don't -- I can't -- just give up because the crowd is cheering for my opponent, and it's embarrassing to be so publicly defeated. I don't give up because I didn't know the right moves to counteract a certain hold. If I step on the mat, I know my Coach can coach me through anything.

I love God, and my belief, my relationship with Him -- it's worth the wrestle.

[Linda Hart · Rating 5 out of 5]

Absolutely excellent, especially for those who are struggling with their faith.

[alisonwonderland (Alison) · Rating 4 out of 5]

My husband and I listened to this short book, read by the author, during a recent road trip. Written for an LDS audience, the focus is the idea that we all have questions about what is true, but that is not just okay but good. Having questions is good because it makes us seekers - which is the way to find. I gained some meaningful insights into my own search for God and truth.

[Brenda Lower · Rating 5 out of 5]

I need to read it again when I have a little more time to digest it all, but it was fantastic!

[Elisa · Rating 5 out of 5]

Love this book! Thought provoking and uplifting. Here are my notes:

Questions can be instruments of growth. Questions against a backdrop of faith and with an earnest desire to learn always lead to spiritual growth and a stronger testimony. Pg 5

If we ask questions with doubt we would be saying something like, "here's something I don't understand, so the Gospel must not be true." Or if we ask in faith it would be something like "here's something I don't understand, but I wonder what the Lord or his prophets will teach us about this?" Are your questions asked with the assumption that there are answers? are you willing to trust the Lord and give him the benefit of the doubt?

"I went to work. I fasted and prayed, pored over the Scriptures, went to the temple, and pleaded for spiritual enlightenment. I was essentially asking for the grace, or power, of the Lord to help me understand the grace of the Lord. It was a grueling process, particularly as the conference neared and I had volumes of notes but no talk. But then, little by little, the spirit began to not only clarify points of doctrine but bring to my mind experiences I've had throughout my life that were clearly manifestations of grace – though I had not always realized it at the time." 26

"I received enough enlightenment enough times to know that there's always more to learn, always greater light and knowledge available. When we are willing to wrestle spiritually for knowledge and revelation, the spirit will enlighten us, guide us to truth, and bless us with peace of heart and mind. The Lord needs men and women who can talk with confidence about what they believe. Men and women who aren't afraid to wrestle with tough questions. Men and women who can talk to children, youth, and each other about everything from the churches teachings about marriage to other issues that can cause confusion and threaten faith. We of all people should be comfortable discussing any topic, any issue, any doctrine with anyone, because we can draw from a deeper reservoir of revealed truth.… The Lord needs men and women who know how to get answers.men And women who aren't easily deceived and whose testimonies aren't shaken by someone with carefully crafted talking points." Page 32

Ask more questions. Be a humble seeker (and learner) of knowledge.

"Growing spiritually and receiving answers to our questions depends Upon our ability to feel, hear and understand the whisperings of the Spirit." 36

Ask the Lord: 1)to teach you what it feels and sounds like for you when he is speaking to you via the Holy Ghost.
2) if you never asked the Lord how he feels about you, that is a great question to ask. Over time, he will tell you, and as he does you'll learn more about discerning revelation through the Spirit. Page 41

"When we are willing to work, the Lord will teach us, open our eyes to things we haven't seen before, and lead us along as we grow in our understanding about the truths of the Gospel." Page 43

"Doubting not does not mean understanding everything. It means not doubting that God knows more than we do… It means believing that God is that he created all things in heaven and earth and has always been in power." Page 48

Elder Jeffrey are called Holland in an address to church educational system administrators and teachers said "not all gospel questions have answers, yet, but they will come. In the meantime, I have a question. What conceivable historical or doctrinal or procedural issue that may arise among any group could ever overshadow or negate one's consuming spiritual conviction regarding The fathers merciful plan of salvation; his only begotten son's birth, mission, atonement, and resurrection; the reality of the first vision; the restoration of the priesthood; the receipt of divine revelation, both personally and institutionally; the soul shaping spirit and moving power of the book of Mormon; The awe and majesty of the temple endowment; one's own personal experience with true miracles; and on and on and on? Talk about a question! It is a mystery to me how those majestic, eternal, first level truth so central to the grandeur of the whole gospel message can be set aside or completely dismissed by some in favor of obsessing over second or third or fourth level pieces of that whole. To me, this is, in words attributed to Edith Wharton, truly being trapped in "the thick of thin things"" page 50

"Faith does not stand still. It is either increasing or disappearing. As President Henry B Eyring has said, "Faith has a short shelflife." Page 51

"When questions arise or when blessings you've been pleading for remain unfulfilled, these issues are not an indication that you don't have a testimony or that the gospel is not true. They are an invitation for you to grow spiritually." Page 51

We need help when we progress (after knee surgery she needed help especially in the form of a physical therapist who knew the path ahead). We can get help through prophets and apostles, through prayer and scriptures. Pg 61-64

At a question and answer with a stake presidency on marriage, including gay marriage, someone who was experiencing same sex attraction and was frustrated by the church's position on gay marriage asked a question about it to which the stake president responded, "please understand Satan will do everything he can to encourage you to separate yourself from those who hold priesthood keys. My plea is that, regardless of the nature of your personal struggles, you don't ever succumb to that temptation. Those who hold keys can help you and guide you in ways others cannot." Page 68

A girl and her institute class mentioned that before this past session of General conference she had read or listened to a talk from the last general conference every day starting six months before, and she felt that because the Lord could see she had taken the words of his prophets seriously from the last conference that he gave her even more personal inspiration during this general conference. 72

"As the world marches steadily toward the second coming, fewer and fewer people will be in a position or will be willing to declare their faith. So the bearing of testimony will become an even greater distinction and a light in the darkness to those whose spirits are receptive to the truth." 75

Defending Joseph smith (250,000 words, 600 page manuscript, translated in 65 working days between April and June 1829). Emma smiths quote about her being the scribe hour after hour and then they'd stop for a meal and resume right away where he left off without seeing the manuscript or having any portion read to him. Pg 81

Reporter from international broadcasting network visited Salt Lake City to research a story on the women in the church. She done her homework and ask intelligent questions. She asked how do you feel about not being eligible for priesthood ordination?" Because of her respectful demeanor and that she seems to sincerely want to understand the privileges women in the church have I found myself explaining more than I would have otherwise particularly about the ways that women have direct access to the power of God. Although I could say little about the temple, I did tell her that as a woman and out of power in the temple, I had access to God's power, or priesthood power, for my own life. And I explained that my focus has long been on learning how to gain full access to that power. She paused and then asked "are you saying that you believe you have more access to God's power than I do?" "Well actually…yes. now, do not misunderstand what I'm saying. I am not seeing the Lord loves me more than he loves you or that I'm better than you. I'm not saying that he is more likely to bless me and then head to you. I am not suggesting any of those things. But if you're asking if I believe I've greater access to God's power than you do, then the answer has to be yes. That is one of the blessings of joining this church. We believe that when we make promises to God to follow his son, he in turn makes promises to us. And one of those promises is that he will give us greater access to his power." 85-86

A 4 year old boy, when asked why he was such a good member of the class and so kind to everyone he responded "because Jesus has rules" and when asked what that meant he said "if we want Jesus to help us, we have to follow his rules." Page 87. Secret of a great life

A Trial is a gift. (Reminds me of a similar quote from mother Teresa)

[Donna · Rating 3 out of 5]

This is a nonfiction religious book. I like this author. I like that she speaks from personal experience and she expresses her strong religious convictions well. While she did speak of scriptural references, I prefer a little more. I liked her overall message though. So 3 stars.

[Saralyn · Rating 5 out of 5]

Loved this. I'm convinced. The wrestle is worth it! :)

[Katie · Rating 4 out of 5]

A short but uplifting read, with affirming reminders for people of faith (specifically the LDS faith) in a world sometimes ruled by doubt and ridicule. I underlined a number of meaningful quotes and sentences, and I will refer to this book again. Thanks, mom, for the Christmas gift!

[Lily · Rating 3 out of 5]

My main takeaway from this book is that questions are God's invitation for spiritual growth, especially when we ask in faith.

My main concern with the book is that some questions are hard to frame in the "faithful" context Sheri Dew describes. She encourages the questioner to ask questions within a frame of testimony of God, Joseph Smith, and living prophets, but if all of those items of testimony are a given, then we either won't think of or can't ask certain difficult questions.

[Kellie's Book List · Rating 5 out of 5]

My only problem with this book is that there isn't more of it! It has so much packed into its limited pages it often read as a textbook. However, that's not necessarily a bad thing. I think this book is meant to serve as a starting off point, rather than as an answer to all our questions. I look forward to acting on many of her suggestions and reading further in her referenced talks and books.

[Michelle · Rating 5 out of 5]

I loved this book and I love the premise that asking questions about the gospel is not a sign of lack of faith, but a way to strengthen it.

[Cynthia Egbert · Rating 4 out of 5]

Is it terrible to admit that you picked up a religious book for the pictures? Well, that was the case here. When I saw who had illustrated this work (James Christensen), I had to own it. The written stuff was great as well! I appreciated Sheri Dew's willingness to put herself out there with personal stories and anecdotes, not always showing her in a positive light, to clarify her points. There were many reminders that I need in my life right now and I am grateful that this was the next book in my stack.
A few thoughts to remember:
"When we have unresolved questions, our challenge does not lie in what we think we know. It lies in what we don't YET know."

"We are imperfect people trying to understand and communicate a perfect message."

"It is not the function of religion to answer all the questions about God's moral government of the universe, but to give one courage, through faith, to go on in the face of questions he never finds the answer to in his present status." -Harold B. Lee

"You read Jane Austen and you put it back on the shelf and it makes no further demand of until you feel like reading it again. But you read a sacred text and you put it back on the shelf and it's still making a demand of you hours later, days later, weeks later. It is saying this is a truth to be lived. That is the difference between religion and culture. Unless you hear a command or an obligation that comes from beyond you, you will not be able to generate sustainable, actionable faith." -Rabbi Lord Jonathon Sacks

"Vague, uplifting , non doctrinal religiosity doesn't actually last. The religions that grow, succor, and motivate people to perform heroic acts of service are usually theologically rigorous, arduous in practice and definite in their convictions about what is True and what is False. That's because people are not gods. No matter who special some individuals may think they are, they don't have the ability to understand the world on their own, establish rules of good conduct on their own, or avoid the temptations of laziness on their own. The religions that thrive have exactly what "The Book of Mormon Musical ridicules: communal theologies, doctrines and codes of conduct rooted in claims of absolute truth." -David Brooks, New York Times columnist

"As evil increases in the world, there is a compensatory spiritual power for the righteous. As the world slides from its spiritual moorings, the Lord prepares the way for those who seek Him, offering them greater assurance, greater confirmation, and greater confidence in the spiritual direction they are traveling. The gift of the Holy Ghost becomes a brighter light in the emerging twilight." -Elder Neil L Andersen

"A spiritual witness is never based on tangible evidence."

[Susan · Rating 4 out of 5]

Written for an LDS audience this little book is about finding, and not finding, answers to our questions and doubts regarding faith. I soon found myself thinking, "I need a pencil ... " and folding down the corners of pages I wish to revisit for additional reflection. I considered not reviewing but the whole reason I started reviewing here on goodreads was to make myself think beyond, "I liked that book!" and be able to return and refresh my memory a bit regarding particular books from time to time. I think Sheri Dew has done a pretty god job distilling her topic her down to tight narrative that handles her chosen topic very well but here goes.

My main take away: Questions are not just good, they're great!

Dew maintains that even when we have pleaded with Heaven and failed to receive an answer to our heart felt, complicated problems that this does not mean there is not an answer or that God does not love us or is refusing to bless us (as an individual) but rather represents an opportunity to grow in faith and trust, in knowledge and learning, as we continue to wrestle for those answers.

"...when questions arise or when blessing you've been pleading for remain unfulfilled, these issues are not an indication that you don't have a testimony or that the gospel is not true. They are invitation for you to grow spiritually."

"Asking inspired questions leads to knowledge. It leads to Revelation. It leads to greater faith. And it leads to peace. Not asking questions, on the other hand, closes off revelation, growth, learning, progression, and the ministering of the Holy Ghost."

Good stuff. The wrestle is indeed worth it.

[Beth Given · Rating 4 out of 5]

A short book by Sheri Dew. I liked how she reframed "questioners" as "seekers." And I really, really liked the chapter called "Receiving Revelation." Some quotes from that chapter:

"When the Lord sees that we want to communicate with Him, He will teach us how." (p. 41)

"If we seek to have regular spiritual experiences with the Spirit, we will have them. It takes spiritual work, and usually it takes wrestling -- an ongoing spiritual wrestle that becomes a regular part of life rather than something engaged in only when trouble hits. But the Lord is eager to communicate with us through the manifestations and promptings of the Holy Ghost. And the cumulative effect of repeated witnesses of the Spirit becomes something of an inoculation against the ups and downs, the confusion and bewilderment, and the plain old agonies of life. When we put ourselves in a position to feel the Spirit and receive repeated confirmations from heaven, we also put ourselves in a position to counteract deception, distortion, and untruths." (p. 35)

And a quote from President Harold B. Lee that Sister Dew included: "It is not the function of religion to answer all the questions about God's moral government of the universe, but to give one courage, through faith, to go on in the face of questions he never finds the answer to in his present status."

[Rae · Rating 4 out of 5]

Inspiration requires effort. Good stuff here.

[Jenny · Rating 5 out of 5]

LOVED this book. It's one where I wanted to underline and/or write down almost every word to remember. Sheri Dew teaches that it's not only okay, it is good/important/necessary to ask questions and to seek for answers. She addresses how to "seek learning by study and also by faith" and how to use questions and this spiritual wrestling to strengthen your testimony and draw nearer to Christ.

I took pages and pages of notes and found several topics I want to study further. A few things to remember: I love her own personal experiences that she shares as well as experiences of others. I was struck by her comment that the depth and breadth of our knowledge really comes down to us individually and it will be through our own disobedience, laziness or apathy that we fail to gain spiritual knowledge...but also explaining that there will be some things we will not get answers to quickly or perhaps in this life. I can do better to not be lazy or apathetic when it comes to studying and gaining spiritual knowledge. I love her explanation of why prophets and leaders with priesthood keys are so important. I love her description of how the gospel has blessed her life. I love all that she says about how the Savior heals us and how His Atonement affects every part of our life. And my words don't even begin to do the book justice. If you've ever struggled with a tough gospel question, read this book. If you want to learn more about keeping covenants and the power associated with covenants, read this book. If you want to better understand learning by faith, read this book. If you want to be motivated and inspired and touched, read this book.

[LeeAnn · Rating 5 out of 5]

Sheri Dew is my absolute favorite author, writer, and editor for all things religious. it helps that she keeps her message short and to the point and that she is a woman who has had struggles, some of which I have also had. (Yes, my favorite part is that in spite of not fulfilling her #1 life goal of becoming a wife and mother here in mortality, she has moved on to develop her talents and create a full life that includes mentoring and mothering children and teens as they have needed throughout her life.)

So yet another of small doctrinal books on my Love list. I highly recommend any of Sheri Dew's books if you have questions. This one specifically deals with questions we may have whose answers do not come quickly or easily. Hint: They DO come if we Wrestle with the Lord and prove our intent.

[Alice · Rating 3 out of 5]

I felt like this book kind of promotes an Us vs. Them mentality in that it gives the idea that if you haven't gotten the right answer, then you've been asking wrong.

I also found quite a bit of inspiration, and I appreciated the effort. Sister Dew shares a lot of her own personal frustration and pain with certain aspects of the church.

Ultimately it comes down to: Do you want to believe? Do you want to put forth effort to believe? If so, this book might give you some inspiration to continue your quest for understanding.

If that's not where you are at, then this book is probably going to annoy you more than help you.

The illustrations are delightful. James C. Christensen passed away not too long ago, so this may have been the last thing he worked on.

[Karen · Rating 4 out of 5]

An Insightful and inspired read that really made me ponder and evaluate my own level of commitment to my faith in Jesus Christ. I love Sheri Dew and her no nonsense style that I connect with so readily. She offers thought provoking questions and commentary that challenge you and motivate self reflection.
I think I highlighted half the book!

I like this Quote: "Asking inspired questions leads to knowledge. It leads to Revelation. It leads to greater faith. And it leads to peace. Not asking questions, on the other hand, closes off revelation, growth, learning, progression, and the ministering of the Holy Ghost."

[A.B. · Rating 4 out of 5]

Sheri Dew gave a mini version of this book during a devotional address a few years ago. She spoke about "brain sweat" and its necessity for really "owning" or, even, simply knowing something. This gives a concrete method for wrestling with hard stuff and, mostly, I'm just so grateful how she acknowledged (at least) some of the nitty-gritty hard stuff, and she has credibility here. I love how she taught to address questions with another question: well, is it worth the wrestle to find out the answer?

[T.K. · Rating 5 out of 5]

I love the idea behind this--that faith should be full of questions and we should be actively pursuing those answers by further study and prayer. It reminds me of one of the ironies of snow skiing: If you aren't falling, you aren't learning. We so often think of faith as blind, and questioning an act of apostasy, but Sheri Dew says just the opposite. Seeking answers to our questions is how we build our testimony. 4.5 stars

[Melanie · Rating 4 out of 5]

Really enjoyed this book. Lots of meat for thought regarding the asking of sincere questions in a faith-filled way, using the “wrestle” for truth to bring me closer to God and his plan for me and my family.

[Wanda · Rating 4 out of 5]

I learned a lot from this book. It's okay to question the things we've been taught if we diligently search out the answers for ourselves through sincere prayer and scripture study. I will need to re-read this one again and again to remind myself of the lessons learned. It's a short book filled with the author's personal experiences as well as quotes from our apostles and prophets. The title says it all. It's worth the wrestle.
2nd reading Feb 10, 2021

[Sara · Rating 5 out of 5]

Another insightful book by Sheri Dew! Although we may have many questions, we can still hold on to faith in seeking the answers that sometimes elude us. This book will help you appreciate the process of asking questions in a manner that results in increased faith rather than staying mired in doubt. You will also discover what is worth "wrestling" for along the way. Great book!

[Heidi · Rating 4 out of 5]

My main takeaway from this book is the reminder that questions are good. I was inspired to dig deep into my gospel questions, to find answers through personal revelation. In this short but inspiring book Sheri Dew shares many practical and relatable personal experiences with questions she has had and the answers she has received.

[M · Rating 5 out of 5]

I love the way Sister Dew puts things, but this is a most timely book. She sums it up best, "Do you want a testimony?" Then it's worth the wrestle. Not just a "have faith and muddle through" book. Loved it.

[Marie · Rating 4 out of 5]

I'm so grateful Sheri Dew is willing to share her experiences with the gospel and living life when it didn't turn out the way you expected. This is a book I will definitely read again. Great advice, thought provoking.