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The Chocolateman
The Chocolateman: a short story by Jonathan Butcher
“There was a rhyme that some of them said the Chocolateman had whispered to them through the pipes: I’m the one who eats your food, after you’ve digested it …”
“Please stop.”
“My aim is never to be rude – just to eat your rich chocolate …”
“Please, I don’t like it.”
“I’m the Chocolateman, you know, I take my time but I’m never slow…”
“That's enough!”
“Kreb’s the name, called one, two, three. Take a dump and there I’ll be.”
The Sinister Horror Company invites you to wade through the filth of this short story as Jonathan Butcher introduces us to the foulest, most perverse horror villain of the modern age.
“There was a rhyme that some of them said the Chocolateman had whispered to them through the pipes: I’m the one who eats your food, after you’ve digested it …”
“Please stop.”
“My aim is never to be rude – just to eat your rich chocolate …”
“Please, I don’t like it.”
“I’m the Chocolateman, you know, I take my time but I’m never slow…”
“That's enough!”
“Kreb’s the name, called one, two, three. Take a dump and there I’ll be.”
The Sinister Horror Company invites you to wade through the filth of this short story as Jonathan Butcher introduces us to the foulest, most perverse horror villain of the modern age.
21 pages, Kindle Edition
First published April 22, 2017
1 person is currently reading
57 people want to read
About the author
Jonathan Butcher
32 books262 followersSplatterpunk Award-nominated author who writes disturbing horror with a difference.
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Displaying 1 - 14 of 14 reviews
February 22, 2026
Ok, so let me first off say that this managed to make me wince several times. I actually read this short story, along with several others, in Butcher’s ‘Scat, Splats, and Stupid Twats.’ For such a very brief book, it wastes no time and goes for the kill (Pun intended!). So Chocolateman was the most fleshed out and is the precursor to the fully developed book by the same name. The premise differs a bit, but it’s very comparable in nature. Somehow, it was the most tame of this collection. I would recommend reading Chocolateman before you do this compilation, as you’ll need to adequately prepare for the sheer nastiness here. The stories are very short, extreme, and brutal, but serve their purpose of being included in a book called Scats, Splats, and Stupid Twats.
May 29, 2021
This is the third story/novella that I have read by Jonathan Butcher, and they have all been different from each other. They each kept my rapt attention. Chocolateman is a character you do not want to meet. But the man he encounters is equally, if not more, abhorrent. A very messy and unclean justice is served. While this tale is definitely not for the squeamish, those who appreciate a different kind of story will get a kick out if this one. Take precautions. Don't flush.
May 28, 2021
Holy shit (pun intended) that was a nasty little story. I listened to this as an audiobook read by the author.
First, the story itself. This was well written, with great imagery and plot. The characters were fleshed out for such a short story. I knew how the story would end, just not how. It was done perfectly and I look forward to reading more from Jonathan.
The narration was well done. A couple of mouth noises, but that added to the story. His emotion and enthusiasm added to depth of the story.
First, the story itself. This was well written, with great imagery and plot. The characters were fleshed out for such a short story. I knew how the story would end, just not how. It was done perfectly and I look forward to reading more from Jonathan.
The narration was well done. A couple of mouth noises, but that added to the story. His emotion and enthusiasm added to depth of the story.
July 9, 2021
Holy shit this was good! 💩
February 15, 2023
3.5* just when you're thinking there's never a wrong time for a piece of chocolate, you'll realize there is.
Funny, gross and bizarre, that's on the other hand never the wrong time to get a piece off.
I listened to the authors reading as part of Godless Read - absolutely recommendable 😁
Funny, gross and bizarre, that's on the other hand never the wrong time to get a piece off.
I listened to the authors reading as part of Godless Read - absolutely recommendable 😁
May 29, 2021
Nasty short story. Great plot with an urban legend feel to it. Short and disturbing.
June 23, 2021
An entertaining albeit disgusting take on an urban legend. I think I’ll stick to saying Bloody Mary in the mirror. I got a good laugh out of this one for sure.
July 1, 2021
I was given the opportunity to take an early listen of Jonathan Butcher’s new Audible Release; Chocolateman.
I didn’t actually look into this book at all, I just thought it would be a good opportunity to experience a bit of Jonathan Butcher’s work and get him on the blog since I have read his work before but only one short story which featured on the Sinister Advent Calendar last Christmas. That story was called Gifts from a Star and was beautifully written. That story was about grieving the loss of a child at Christmas time.
This story is somewhat sillier but I have to say it is an example, in my opinion, of extreme horror done right. The narrator (played by Butcher himself) is telling us about a day in his life and the events which are unfolding as if it’s a perfectly normal thing to be doing. Except one thing which is spoiling his day, an encounter with a strange character in a public toilet as he waits for his train.
Later in the story, it unfolds that this strange fellow is known to people as something of an urban legend. What I liked about this, and about the theme in general is that it comes off as the exact kind of thing I was told as a child. Those little ghost stories that your siblings and cousins tell you to freak you out. The reason, in fact, why I couldn’t enter the Y3 toilets alone.. as a child my beloved sister told me stories about someone who was trapped between the two entrance doors and murdered by a spirit who came out of the light. So we had to toilet in pairs, one to open the first door and one to open the second as our child arms were too short to hold both doors at once. Anyway, I digress..
This story is all of that and a little bit more, the acts that the narrator is carrying out, whilst horrific are not what draws our attention, because even though he is describing his actions he is neither lording them as the work of god nor acting like we should be upset by them. He’s simply sharing facts, as one might describe their actions on a how to video or cooking channel. Our attention instead is drawn to the story of the Chocolateman.
Just to let you know, the Chocolate is not the kind we buy wrapped prettily from the shops.. it’s a kind of home made variety that comes to most of us quite regularly..
Read it if you dare, this campfire-esque story has the perfect creep factor and is read beautifully by it’s creator. Definitely an interesting one for before bed whilst I was making a pretty picture of a tree with my Diamond Art. It’s not overdone, it’s not trying too hard which in my experience is a pitfall of the extreme horror genre.
I didn’t actually look into this book at all, I just thought it would be a good opportunity to experience a bit of Jonathan Butcher’s work and get him on the blog since I have read his work before but only one short story which featured on the Sinister Advent Calendar last Christmas. That story was called Gifts from a Star and was beautifully written. That story was about grieving the loss of a child at Christmas time.
This story is somewhat sillier but I have to say it is an example, in my opinion, of extreme horror done right. The narrator (played by Butcher himself) is telling us about a day in his life and the events which are unfolding as if it’s a perfectly normal thing to be doing. Except one thing which is spoiling his day, an encounter with a strange character in a public toilet as he waits for his train.
Later in the story, it unfolds that this strange fellow is known to people as something of an urban legend. What I liked about this, and about the theme in general is that it comes off as the exact kind of thing I was told as a child. Those little ghost stories that your siblings and cousins tell you to freak you out. The reason, in fact, why I couldn’t enter the Y3 toilets alone.. as a child my beloved sister told me stories about someone who was trapped between the two entrance doors and murdered by a spirit who came out of the light. So we had to toilet in pairs, one to open the first door and one to open the second as our child arms were too short to hold both doors at once. Anyway, I digress..
This story is all of that and a little bit more, the acts that the narrator is carrying out, whilst horrific are not what draws our attention, because even though he is describing his actions he is neither lording them as the work of god nor acting like we should be upset by them. He’s simply sharing facts, as one might describe their actions on a how to video or cooking channel. Our attention instead is drawn to the story of the Chocolateman.
Just to let you know, the Chocolate is not the kind we buy wrapped prettily from the shops.. it’s a kind of home made variety that comes to most of us quite regularly..
Read it if you dare, this campfire-esque story has the perfect creep factor and is read beautifully by it’s creator. Definitely an interesting one for before bed whilst I was making a pretty picture of a tree with my Diamond Art. It’s not overdone, it’s not trying too hard which in my experience is a pitfall of the extreme horror genre.
September 10, 2018
I don't have the kindle version. I have the paperback book purchased from the sinister horror company.
Got the chance to sit and read this short horror romp today. Of course I had a basic idea what it was about and that concept was very fun to read. Yes it's horror and yes it's kinda gross but it's also very creative.
Nice little " weird " book. I liked the authors style so will be looking into getting something else done by him.
Would recommend for horror enthusiasts who have a "taste" for something a little more bizarre.
Got the chance to sit and read this short horror romp today. Of course I had a basic idea what it was about and that concept was very fun to read. Yes it's horror and yes it's kinda gross but it's also very creative.
Nice little " weird " book. I liked the authors style so will be looking into getting something else done by him.
Would recommend for horror enthusiasts who have a "taste" for something a little more bizarre.
January 17, 2023
Mr. Butcher didn't waste any time jumping right into the story! It wasn't scary but it definitely made you a little uncomfortable. I wouldn't advise eating while reading/listening to this, lol. His narration was really enjoyable! I would definitely recommend.
April 23, 2017
Unique and disgusting
This book was great read in its own way. It reminds me of the movie Beatlejuice you say his name 3 times and he shows up, but this is some kind of monster that eats shit and you intestines. Great read.
This book was great read in its own way. It reminds me of the movie Beatlejuice you say his name 3 times and he shows up, but this is some kind of monster that eats shit and you intestines. Great read.
January 18, 2019
Probably one of the most bizarre stories I've ever had the pleasure to read. Sick, twisted and delightfully written, this is a truly horrifying sweet treat.
May 29, 2021
It's about shit. If you like shit, you'll like this.
May 3, 2017
Disturbing and graphic. Very effective horror!
NOT for the faint of heart!
I am not usually a fan of extreme horror. But I do like The Sinister Horror Company. So when they released this short story with this delightful title I thought I should check it out. It certainly packs a punch! There are some very gruesome and, at times, disgusting moments in the story. The protagonist has very little (if any) positive qualities, so by the end of the story when the Chocolateman makes his final appearance we are left satisfied, and horrified. Above all else, the (literally) filthy scenes and the gruesome descriptions, this is a very effective and very creepy short story.
Now, if you don't mind, I need to go to the bathroom. I hope I make it back...
NOT for the faint of heart!
I am not usually a fan of extreme horror. But I do like The Sinister Horror Company. So when they released this short story with this delightful title I thought I should check it out. It certainly packs a punch! There are some very gruesome and, at times, disgusting moments in the story. The protagonist has very little (if any) positive qualities, so by the end of the story when the Chocolateman makes his final appearance we are left satisfied, and horrified. Above all else, the (literally) filthy scenes and the gruesome descriptions, this is a very effective and very creepy short story.
Now, if you don't mind, I need to go to the bathroom. I hope I make it back...
Displaying 1 - 14 of 14 reviews