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The Gift of Our Wounds: A Sikh and a Former White Supremacist Find Forgiveness after Hate
One Sikh. One former Skinhead. Together, an unusual friendship emerged out of a desire to make a difference.
When white supremacist Wade Michael Page murdered six people and wounded four in a Sikh Temple in Wisconsin in 2012, Pardeep Kaleka was devastated. The temple leader, now dead, was his father. His family, who had immigrated to the U.S. from India when Pardeep was young, had done everything right. Why was this happening to him? Meanwhile, Arno Michaelis, a former skinhead and founder of one of the largest racist skinhead organizations in the world, had spent years of his life committing terrible acts in the name of white power. When he heard about the attack, waves of guilt washing over him, he knew he had to take action and fight against the very crimes he used to commit.
After the Oak Creek tragedy, Arno and Pardeep worked together to start an organization called Serve 2 Unite, which works with students to create inclusive, compassionate and nonviolent climates in their schools and communities. Their story is one of triumph of love over hate, and of two men who breached a great divide to find compassion and forgiveness. With New York Times bestseller Robin Gaby Fisher telling Arno and Pardeep's story, The Gift of Our Wounds is a timely reminder of the strength of the human spirit, and the courage and compassion that reside within us all.
When white supremacist Wade Michael Page murdered six people and wounded four in a Sikh Temple in Wisconsin in 2012, Pardeep Kaleka was devastated. The temple leader, now dead, was his father. His family, who had immigrated to the U.S. from India when Pardeep was young, had done everything right. Why was this happening to him? Meanwhile, Arno Michaelis, a former skinhead and founder of one of the largest racist skinhead organizations in the world, had spent years of his life committing terrible acts in the name of white power. When he heard about the attack, waves of guilt washing over him, he knew he had to take action and fight against the very crimes he used to commit.
After the Oak Creek tragedy, Arno and Pardeep worked together to start an organization called Serve 2 Unite, which works with students to create inclusive, compassionate and nonviolent climates in their schools and communities. Their story is one of triumph of love over hate, and of two men who breached a great divide to find compassion and forgiveness. With New York Times bestseller Robin Gaby Fisher telling Arno and Pardeep's story, The Gift of Our Wounds is a timely reminder of the strength of the human spirit, and the courage and compassion that reside within us all.
222 pages, Hardcover
First published April 10, 2018
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April 18, 2018
The catalyst for The Gift of Our Wounds: A Sikh and a Former White Supremacist Find Forgiveness After Hate was the 2012 massacre at a Sikh Temple in Milwaukee. That massacre, committed by a white supremacist, resulted in the death of six men and the wounding of four other worshippers. Pardeep S. Kaleka’s father, Satwant Singh Kaleka was murdered on that infamous day in August. Following the massacre, Kaleka decides to meet with Arno Michaelis, a former white supremacist and founder of the Hammerskin Nation, one of the largest white power organizations in the world. Michaelis was also a member of the Skinhead band Centurion whose vile lyrics inspired generations of white supremacists. Kaleka and Michaelis meet in a coffee shop despite the objections of Kaleka’s traumatized mother and wife. What follows is a remarkable story of the friendship that is born of this meeting.
The book is written from the point of view of both men. Kaleka is a gentle soul who becomes the first Sikh police officer for the Milwaukee Police Department, only to leave several years later because he was becoming too cynical and hard. He details a growing up in a home filled with a strong work ethic, faith and love. Michaelis details a painful upbringing in an alcoholic household; as a teenager he begins drinking and becomes a follower of white supremacists like the infamous Tom Metzger and former presidential candidate David Duke. Michaelis is brutally honest in describing the pain and injury that he inflicted on African Americans, Gay people and Jewish people. The barbarity of his actions is sickening and difficult to read. Then several events in his life cause Michaelis to question his belief system. His daughter Autumn is born, he begins to look at his drinking and he finally sees that diversity is not a dirty word. He experiences kindness from the very people he would have hurt and acknowledges that he is not deserving of these acts. While it takes him several years to fully leave the white supremacist movement, Michaelis finally begins his metamorphosis into an outspoken voice against hate. The massacre at the Temple causes Michaelis great pain as he sees that his own actions in a brotherhood of hate almost certainly contributed to radicalize the killer.
Much of The Gift of Our Wounds symbolizes the power of forgiveness and love that embodied Kaleka’s father. Even after revealing the horrid crimes that he committed, Kaleka is able to forgive MIchaelis and comes to call Michaelis his “brother.” The influence of his faith, and his father’s legacy of peace and virtue even allow him to forgive the murderer. Kaleka is inspiring in his ability to overcome trauma and begin to affect positive change. He establishes Serve 2 Unite, an organization that encourages young people to see the beauty of all people coming together to fight hate. Today he works as a trauma-informed therapist. He and Michaelis travel together to promote awareness and demonstrate the power of forgiveness and respect for people of every race, creed, sexuality and gender.
While the book is uplifting and filled with hope,The Gift of Our Wounds, is also a warning about the modern day white supremacist movement, which continues to grow. Worldwide, people continue to believe and behave like Michaelis. In 2017, White Supremacists marched the streets of Charlottesville, VA with impunity. Carrying Tiki torches, these vile people chanted the same Nazi slogans that Michaelis referenced in his skinhead music. The march resulted in the murder of an innocent woman and a statement by the President of the United States that some of these white supremacist and Neo-Nazis marchers “very fine people.” Incident like this illustrate the need for people like Kaleka and Michaelis. One hopes that this book, and their organization, can begin to change hearts and minds.
Thank you to Netgalley, St. Martin’s Press, Pardeep S. Kaleka and Arno Michaelis for the ARC of this beautiful book.
The book is written from the point of view of both men. Kaleka is a gentle soul who becomes the first Sikh police officer for the Milwaukee Police Department, only to leave several years later because he was becoming too cynical and hard. He details a growing up in a home filled with a strong work ethic, faith and love. Michaelis details a painful upbringing in an alcoholic household; as a teenager he begins drinking and becomes a follower of white supremacists like the infamous Tom Metzger and former presidential candidate David Duke. Michaelis is brutally honest in describing the pain and injury that he inflicted on African Americans, Gay people and Jewish people. The barbarity of his actions is sickening and difficult to read. Then several events in his life cause Michaelis to question his belief system. His daughter Autumn is born, he begins to look at his drinking and he finally sees that diversity is not a dirty word. He experiences kindness from the very people he would have hurt and acknowledges that he is not deserving of these acts. While it takes him several years to fully leave the white supremacist movement, Michaelis finally begins his metamorphosis into an outspoken voice against hate. The massacre at the Temple causes Michaelis great pain as he sees that his own actions in a brotherhood of hate almost certainly contributed to radicalize the killer.
Much of The Gift of Our Wounds symbolizes the power of forgiveness and love that embodied Kaleka’s father. Even after revealing the horrid crimes that he committed, Kaleka is able to forgive MIchaelis and comes to call Michaelis his “brother.” The influence of his faith, and his father’s legacy of peace and virtue even allow him to forgive the murderer. Kaleka is inspiring in his ability to overcome trauma and begin to affect positive change. He establishes Serve 2 Unite, an organization that encourages young people to see the beauty of all people coming together to fight hate. Today he works as a trauma-informed therapist. He and Michaelis travel together to promote awareness and demonstrate the power of forgiveness and respect for people of every race, creed, sexuality and gender.
While the book is uplifting and filled with hope,The Gift of Our Wounds, is also a warning about the modern day white supremacist movement, which continues to grow. Worldwide, people continue to believe and behave like Michaelis. In 2017, White Supremacists marched the streets of Charlottesville, VA with impunity. Carrying Tiki torches, these vile people chanted the same Nazi slogans that Michaelis referenced in his skinhead music. The march resulted in the murder of an innocent woman and a statement by the President of the United States that some of these white supremacist and Neo-Nazis marchers “very fine people.” Incident like this illustrate the need for people like Kaleka and Michaelis. One hopes that this book, and their organization, can begin to change hearts and minds.
Thank you to Netgalley, St. Martin’s Press, Pardeep S. Kaleka and Arno Michaelis for the ARC of this beautiful book.
March 3, 2018
I believe this is an important read. Seeing how someone's hate can destroy lives was difficult, but it was uplifting and inspirational to see these two men come together in forgiveness and peace. Michaels, a former white supremacist, and Kaleka, a Sikh whose father was murdered by a white supremacist lived two very different lives but show that love, acceptance, and forgiveness make difference.
The Gift of Our Wounds covers Michaels' and Kaleka's lives from childhood through adulthood. It was an interesting juxtaposition between the two. There were times that I was extremely uncomfortable reading about Michaels' teenage and early adult years. I cannot fathom that type of hatred and disgust that he exhibited for others not like him. In contrast, Kaleka's story tells of immigrants who worked hard and gave back to their community.
After a tragic event (the Sikh Temple attack in 2012), these two unlikely allies meet and strive to change the world.
The Gift of Our Wounds covers Michaels' and Kaleka's lives from childhood through adulthood. It was an interesting juxtaposition between the two. There were times that I was extremely uncomfortable reading about Michaels' teenage and early adult years. I cannot fathom that type of hatred and disgust that he exhibited for others not like him. In contrast, Kaleka's story tells of immigrants who worked hard and gave back to their community.
After a tragic event (the Sikh Temple attack in 2012), these two unlikely allies meet and strive to change the world.
April 27, 2018
It is ironic (and somewhat of a wonder even) how a happenstance event - a wild card dealt by Life - a tragedy even - can bring about a phenomenal revelation. Such is this story “The GIft of Our Wounds”. It is a tribute to the capacity of human beings to understand each other, to talk to each other, to love each other - no matter what differences are present.
The co-authors of this book - a former white supremacist and an Indian immigrant whose father was killed in a massacre at a Wisconsin Sikh temple tell both their stories in alternating accounts. The Indian immigrant writes of coming to America, adjusting to life in the Midwest, the culture shock, The former white supremacist, was a founding member of what went on to become the largest racist skinhead organization on Earth, a reverend of a self-declared Racial Holy War, and lead singer of a successful “hate-metal” band. Although he was not involved in the murderous rampage at the Sikh temple, he felt certain he knew who was involved. It is through this horrific event the two men seek to create an opportunity to understand and bridge
the differences that often lead to hate, intolerance, violence and lack of compassion. By way of real communication, a deep understanding of each other takes place - a bond is forged - and the birth of the organization Serve 2 Unite was formed. Serve2 Unite engages young people of all backgrounds to value humanity, to learn and practice unconditional love and forgiveness, to live a life of peace.
I cannot say enough about this book. It deeply affected me in ways I cannot even language.
Thank you NetGalley and St. Martin’s Press for the advance digital copy!
The co-authors of this book - a former white supremacist and an Indian immigrant whose father was killed in a massacre at a Wisconsin Sikh temple tell both their stories in alternating accounts. The Indian immigrant writes of coming to America, adjusting to life in the Midwest, the culture shock, The former white supremacist, was a founding member of what went on to become the largest racist skinhead organization on Earth, a reverend of a self-declared Racial Holy War, and lead singer of a successful “hate-metal” band. Although he was not involved in the murderous rampage at the Sikh temple, he felt certain he knew who was involved. It is through this horrific event the two men seek to create an opportunity to understand and bridge
the differences that often lead to hate, intolerance, violence and lack of compassion. By way of real communication, a deep understanding of each other takes place - a bond is forged - and the birth of the organization Serve 2 Unite was formed. Serve2 Unite engages young people of all backgrounds to value humanity, to learn and practice unconditional love and forgiveness, to live a life of peace.
I cannot say enough about this book. It deeply affected me in ways I cannot even language.
Thank you NetGalley and St. Martin’s Press for the advance digital copy!
April 18, 2018
This is an extraordinary memoir written by an unlikely friendship; a former white supremacist and a peace loving Sikh.
The chapters alternate between both of their stories and what led to their meeting and friendship. At times I found it hard to read the man Arno once was; so full of hate. And felt such sadness when I learnt how Pardeep's father was innocently gunned down whilst at prayer in his temple.
But together Arno and Pardeep shows us what is possible for humanity as they have forged a strong and genuine friendship working together to deliver their message of peace, respect and tolerance.
They both have understanding that hurt people hurt people and if they are met with violence, it won't resolve anything. They are both brave and bold in their mission and determined to challenge behaviours and conditioned thoughts to bring in more understanding and compassion.
I'm reminded of the quote by Jo Cox, the Labour MP that was murdered. "We have far more in common than that which divides us"
This is book of hope
The chapters alternate between both of their stories and what led to their meeting and friendship. At times I found it hard to read the man Arno once was; so full of hate. And felt such sadness when I learnt how Pardeep's father was innocently gunned down whilst at prayer in his temple.
But together Arno and Pardeep shows us what is possible for humanity as they have forged a strong and genuine friendship working together to deliver their message of peace, respect and tolerance.
They both have understanding that hurt people hurt people and if they are met with violence, it won't resolve anything. They are both brave and bold in their mission and determined to challenge behaviours and conditioned thoughts to bring in more understanding and compassion.
I'm reminded of the quote by Jo Cox, the Labour MP that was murdered. "We have far more in common than that which divides us"
This is book of hope
December 7, 2019
Wow. This is just an amazing story of overcoming our natural tendencies. What a tragedy and how wonderful that these two men are going around the country giving this talk.
March 31, 2018
This is an outstanding memoir. It is told from the points of view of a former white supremacist and a man whose father was killed in the Sikh temple shooting in 2012. It is a story of their path to friendship. It is heartbreaking, moving, scary and hopeful. I found the racist rhetoric that Arno learned to be very chilling. It also reminded me again of how dangerous the country is now with people like Stephen Miller in the White House.
I was provided a copy of this book by the publisher via NetGalley for an honest review.
I was provided a copy of this book by the publisher via NetGalley for an honest review.
May 13, 2019
I had high expectations for this book (which is a sure-fire way to be let-down). I think it would have been stronger as a novel about the two’s friendship rather than a double memoir with the last 40 pages about them working together. It didn’t feel fully realized: it could have been so much stronger.
I also judge that Arno, the former racist skinhead, never actually healed the hate inside himself and has taken it into his life as a peace activist. I wonder if he’s aware of that. The way he described getting kicked out of his organization (because of outbursts of anger) was childish—very much playing the victim and not taking responsibility for his own actions. It’s also clear in the way that he talks about himself: he’s very hard on himself. All the meditation in the world won’t heal that anger (in my judgement). But I also relate to that...
I also wish the story had focused LESS on Arno. I see him as a borderline narcissist (with a side of rage issues). The fact that the former white-supremacist had more airtime in a book about a shooting that literally didn’t involve him, speaks wonders. His first response to hearing about the shooting was to post a video on YouTube. DUDE, this isn’t about you. Stop making it about you. I also judge that he was never actually held accountable for all of the horrible shit he did. Sure, he’s dedicated his life to speaking engagements about how he’s changed, but is that enough? He described multiple times how he beat people nearly to death FOR FUN. He was the lead singer of one of the most famous hate-core bands... he was the leader of a racist skinhead organization dedicated to the murder of everyone not white and racist and homophobic... you can’t just wake up one day and decide you’re going to be nice now... I’m not suggesting an eye-for-an-eye, but I don’t see his efforts as restorative justice, I see them as self-centred.
I also judge that Arno, the former racist skinhead, never actually healed the hate inside himself and has taken it into his life as a peace activist. I wonder if he’s aware of that. The way he described getting kicked out of his organization (because of outbursts of anger) was childish—very much playing the victim and not taking responsibility for his own actions. It’s also clear in the way that he talks about himself: he’s very hard on himself. All the meditation in the world won’t heal that anger (in my judgement). But I also relate to that...
I also wish the story had focused LESS on Arno. I see him as a borderline narcissist (with a side of rage issues). The fact that the former white-supremacist had more airtime in a book about a shooting that literally didn’t involve him, speaks wonders. His first response to hearing about the shooting was to post a video on YouTube. DUDE, this isn’t about you. Stop making it about you. I also judge that he was never actually held accountable for all of the horrible shit he did. Sure, he’s dedicated his life to speaking engagements about how he’s changed, but is that enough? He described multiple times how he beat people nearly to death FOR FUN. He was the lead singer of one of the most famous hate-core bands... he was the leader of a racist skinhead organization dedicated to the murder of everyone not white and racist and homophobic... you can’t just wake up one day and decide you’re going to be nice now... I’m not suggesting an eye-for-an-eye, but I don’t see his efforts as restorative justice, I see them as self-centred.
April 10, 2018
Some memoirs ask us to stand with the authors by bearing witness: to their pain and their subsequent growth. In this case, two men experienced life as outsiders in their respective communities. One, due to his anger and hyperactivity, became uncontrollable and found fellowship within the white nationalist movement. The other, due to his religion and family origin, felt visibly identified as ‘other’ while his parents pressured him to maintain old world connections. As adults they found some relative reconciliation with their past; until a gunman shot worshipping Sikhs in Minnesota: a gunman influenced by words and groups previously created by one of these authors. One of the dead at the Temple was a father to the other author.
In their pain at this massacre, they find one another. This book, a dialog and an outcome, is their story. There is much to learn here and two tales to tell. We should open up and greet their courage to share it. The book is moving and well-written. It will stick with you. I received my copy from the publisher through NetGalley.
In their pain at this massacre, they find one another. This book, a dialog and an outcome, is their story. There is much to learn here and two tales to tell. We should open up and greet their courage to share it. The book is moving and well-written. It will stick with you. I received my copy from the publisher through NetGalley.
February 19, 2018
This is a truly touching memoir that revolves around the August 5, 2012, shooting at The Sikh Temple of Wisconsin by a white supremacist. The authors are Arno Michaelis (a reformed skinhead) and Pardeep Kaleka (who had family killed in this tragedy. Together this unlikely duo travel the country speaking about love and forgiveness via their organization, Serve 2 Unite.
Advance Reading Copy disclosure:
I received this book for free from the Publisher in exchange for an honest review. This does not affect my opinion of the book or the content of my review.
Advance Reading Copy disclosure:
I received this book for free from the Publisher in exchange for an honest review. This does not affect my opinion of the book or the content of my review.
April 18, 2018
Inspiring and eye-opening, this memoir is written by the most unlikely of friends: a former white supremest skinhead leader, Arno Michaelis, and a Sikh man, Pardeek Kaleka, whose father was murdered by a man much like Arno used to be. Each tells his own story, describing their formative years and the crises that changed them.
Several months earlier, because his daughter had forgotten her notebook for Sunday School, Pardeek drove her back home to get it, making them late. When they finally did arrive, they saw a multitude of flashing lights and emergency vehicles. Police from several jurisdictions were on high alert and struggling to make sense of what was happening. A white supremest skinhead had entered the Temple and begun shooting people. In the mayhem that followed, Pardeek’s father was killed while fighting to protect the other worshippers.
Several months later, Pardeek was shaken, angry and wanted answers. He couldn’t understand why a person would shoot people who were peacefully worshipping in their church. He read about Arno online and decided to communicate with him. This led to their meeting in person at a restaurant. Apprehensive and terrified, he forced himself to enter and sit down at a table with a frightening looking man covered in tattoos and they began to talk. This was the start of a deep and fruitful friendship that changed both of their lives, as well as the lives of many, many others.
I encourage everyone to read this. It shines a light on the white supremacy movement that is much in the news these days. Like Pardeek, I too have been baffled as to why these violent racists expend so much energy on such a misguided quest. They seem so driven and filled with hate. This book answered many of my questions about how such a person is created and how they think. It was also interesting to learn more about the Sikh religion and practices. Since they wear a turban and often grow long beards, they are often mistaken for Muslims, and, very unfortunately, sometimes resemble Osama Bin Ladin. This has attracted violent, ignorant bigots to attack them, especially since 911. Even so, their religion is based on peace, forgiveness and service to others, and they have responded to this prejudice in positive, life-affirming ways.
Note: I received an advance copy of the ebook from the publisher in exchange for an honest review.
Several months earlier, because his daughter had forgotten her notebook for Sunday School, Pardeek drove her back home to get it, making them late. When they finally did arrive, they saw a multitude of flashing lights and emergency vehicles. Police from several jurisdictions were on high alert and struggling to make sense of what was happening. A white supremest skinhead had entered the Temple and begun shooting people. In the mayhem that followed, Pardeek’s father was killed while fighting to protect the other worshippers.
Several months later, Pardeek was shaken, angry and wanted answers. He couldn’t understand why a person would shoot people who were peacefully worshipping in their church. He read about Arno online and decided to communicate with him. This led to their meeting in person at a restaurant. Apprehensive and terrified, he forced himself to enter and sit down at a table with a frightening looking man covered in tattoos and they began to talk. This was the start of a deep and fruitful friendship that changed both of their lives, as well as the lives of many, many others.
I encourage everyone to read this. It shines a light on the white supremacy movement that is much in the news these days. Like Pardeek, I too have been baffled as to why these violent racists expend so much energy on such a misguided quest. They seem so driven and filled with hate. This book answered many of my questions about how such a person is created and how they think. It was also interesting to learn more about the Sikh religion and practices. Since they wear a turban and often grow long beards, they are often mistaken for Muslims, and, very unfortunately, sometimes resemble Osama Bin Ladin. This has attracted violent, ignorant bigots to attack them, especially since 911. Even so, their religion is based on peace, forgiveness and service to others, and they have responded to this prejudice in positive, life-affirming ways.
Note: I received an advance copy of the ebook from the publisher in exchange for an honest review.
April 8, 2018
The Gift Of Our Woundsby Arno Michaelis and Pardeep Singh Kaleka tells the story of two disparate men brought together by tragedy -- one forged by hate and the other steeped in love and forgiveness. The need to understand what drove Skinhead Wade Michael Page to open fire at a Sikh temple where Pardeep's father and several congregants were killed lead him to Arno, a former white supremacist.
The tale of their meeting and subsequent friendship is beautifully told. The book alternates between the point of view of the two men, but special emphasis is given to Arno's story. It is both riveting and sad. I do wish more time had been spent with Pardeep. I think the book could have benefited from this. Still, the story of how this deep relationship grew from a place of hate is a worthy one.
This ARC was provide by Netgalley in exchange for an honest review.
The tale of their meeting and subsequent friendship is beautifully told. The book alternates between the point of view of the two men, but special emphasis is given to Arno's story. It is both riveting and sad. I do wish more time had been spent with Pardeep. I think the book could have benefited from this. Still, the story of how this deep relationship grew from a place of hate is a worthy one.
This ARC was provide by Netgalley in exchange for an honest review.
April 2, 2019
The summary of this book is misleading and results in a tragic marketing error. A fraction of this book focuses on the tragic shooting that the book is supposed to be about. Rather, we are given two books: one by Pardeep Kaleka and the other by Arno Michaelis. Kaleka's account of the shooting and death of his father made me weep at times. It seemed to perfectly encapsulate the grief experienced by victims of a hate crime. It was so moving, in fact, that I wish Kaleka had been featured more. But instead, Michaelis hijacks this story.
Michaelis comes across as an attention starved narcissist. The turgid details about Arno's past seem irreverent when paralleled with this hate crime. Several times, he blatantly projects himself onto these awful events by saying, "I was once Michael Page (the shooter)." But he wasn't the shooter. And to conflate his racist past with a mentally deranged murderer is a mistake that spits in the face of the victims of this crime. Instead of shedding light on the racist mindset, he just seems to be trying to capitalize on this opportunity by shining the light on himself. At least three times, Michaelis refers to himself as a genius. Genius's don't often get duped into racist ideologies.
I am incensed by Michaelis not because I am repulsed by his past behavior. Rather, I'm repulsed that he is using this shooting and the deaths of these innocent people to boost his own personal brand. There is absolutely nothing to gain from his recounting of his past misadventures. It doesn't help heal and it doesn't explain anything about the shooting itself. Arno is simply using this hate crime to make an attempt at catapulting his experience to relevance.
There is nothing original or even helpful in what Arno provides in the way of overcoming hatred or grief. He off offhandedly mentions meditation and even Buddhism as a source of his transformation. But he seems more excited by what those terms might imply about who he is than by their practical application. Most Buddhist don't use their religion to pick up girls in a bar and that's what Arno seems to be doing here. I'm not even sure how much Arno has changed. It sounds like his behavior is the same while his words are different. For instance, he goes into great detail about how he was removed from his own post-racist Love Over Hate organization because of a temper problem. I loved the irony but it is probably a more accurate reflection of who he is than he would have us believe. He does clarify, though, that his anger is just a symptom of a concussion he got when he was younger.
The Sikh Temple shooting was a tragedy. It's also a tragedy when white people hijack tragedies such as these for their own profit and gain.
Michaelis comes across as an attention starved narcissist. The turgid details about Arno's past seem irreverent when paralleled with this hate crime. Several times, he blatantly projects himself onto these awful events by saying, "I was once Michael Page (the shooter)." But he wasn't the shooter. And to conflate his racist past with a mentally deranged murderer is a mistake that spits in the face of the victims of this crime. Instead of shedding light on the racist mindset, he just seems to be trying to capitalize on this opportunity by shining the light on himself. At least three times, Michaelis refers to himself as a genius. Genius's don't often get duped into racist ideologies.
I am incensed by Michaelis not because I am repulsed by his past behavior. Rather, I'm repulsed that he is using this shooting and the deaths of these innocent people to boost his own personal brand. There is absolutely nothing to gain from his recounting of his past misadventures. It doesn't help heal and it doesn't explain anything about the shooting itself. Arno is simply using this hate crime to make an attempt at catapulting his experience to relevance.
There is nothing original or even helpful in what Arno provides in the way of overcoming hatred or grief. He off offhandedly mentions meditation and even Buddhism as a source of his transformation. But he seems more excited by what those terms might imply about who he is than by their practical application. Most Buddhist don't use their religion to pick up girls in a bar and that's what Arno seems to be doing here. I'm not even sure how much Arno has changed. It sounds like his behavior is the same while his words are different. For instance, he goes into great detail about how he was removed from his own post-racist Love Over Hate organization because of a temper problem. I loved the irony but it is probably a more accurate reflection of who he is than he would have us believe. He does clarify, though, that his anger is just a symptom of a concussion he got when he was younger.
The Sikh Temple shooting was a tragedy. It's also a tragedy when white people hijack tragedies such as these for their own profit and gain.
September 8, 2019
Enlightening. It gave me the gift of hope.
April 10, 2018
I received an ARC of "THE GIFT OF OUR WOUNDS" from NetGalley for an honest review. I wish to thank NetGalley, St. Martin's Press, and Arno Michaelis/Pardeep Singh Kaleka for the opportunity to read this book.
This book is exceedingly timely with all of the violence that we have happening in the United States currently. This book shows that if a racist skinhead and a Sikh can become brothers than we all can become ONE! The simple beauty of the book and the organization that they are involved with "Serve 2 Unite" is about EMPATHY. I love this!!
This was a very easy book to read even though it was about difficult subject matter. DEFINITE recommend!.
This book is exceedingly timely with all of the violence that we have happening in the United States currently. This book shows that if a racist skinhead and a Sikh can become brothers than we all can become ONE! The simple beauty of the book and the organization that they are involved with "Serve 2 Unite" is about EMPATHY. I love this!!
This was a very easy book to read even though it was about difficult subject matter. DEFINITE recommend!.
April 10, 2018
This book is extraordinarily amazing and beautiful heart touching memoir of a friendship between former white supremacist and a peace loving Sikh. It’s not religion, color or race that makes us different or someone bad but an individual person and their perspective, we have more in common between us than differences. Arno & Pradeep’s unlikely friendship & their courage to spread the message of tolerance and peace.. This book gives such a positive message and gives hope that we can live peacefully as one nation regardless of our religion and skin color . A must recommend read.
May 27, 2019
On August 5, 2012, a white supremacist began shooting at a Sikh temple in Oak Creek, Wisconsin. Six worshipers were killed, including Satwant Singh Kaleka, the father of Pardeep Singh Kaleka. one of the authors of this book. The other author, Arno Michaelis, is a reformed white supremacist. The two have joined their voices in this fascinating book.
I have never read the life story of a white supremacist before. Arno tells of his life, his boredom in school, the intensity of his urge to bully and hurt those different from him--the weak. He also describes attending a camp that trained him to be a soldier in the so-called coming race war. Pardeep, too, has a life story different from any I have heard before. His parents were Sikh immigrants, dedicated to hard work and the values embedded in their religion. He became a police officer in Milwaukee, then a teacher. The two together seem an unusual pair, but the work they created together helps me see a way forward from hate to acceptance.
The book reads quickly. Although Pardeep discusses his faith and how its tenets have guided his understanding of a way beyond the tragedy, there is no religious solution imposed upon its content. Interestingly, during his years as a street fighter, Arno found the KKK unattractive because it considered itself a Christian organization.
The biographies of these two men are interesting in themselves. I also found their discussion of the possibility of change one of the rare bits of good news on this topic I've heard since Charlottesville. I highly recommend this book.
I have never read the life story of a white supremacist before. Arno tells of his life, his boredom in school, the intensity of his urge to bully and hurt those different from him--the weak. He also describes attending a camp that trained him to be a soldier in the so-called coming race war. Pardeep, too, has a life story different from any I have heard before. His parents were Sikh immigrants, dedicated to hard work and the values embedded in their religion. He became a police officer in Milwaukee, then a teacher. The two together seem an unusual pair, but the work they created together helps me see a way forward from hate to acceptance.
The book reads quickly. Although Pardeep discusses his faith and how its tenets have guided his understanding of a way beyond the tragedy, there is no religious solution imposed upon its content. Interestingly, during his years as a street fighter, Arno found the KKK unattractive because it considered itself a Christian organization.
The biographies of these two men are interesting in themselves. I also found their discussion of the possibility of change one of the rare bits of good news on this topic I've heard since Charlottesville. I highly recommend this book.
December 19, 2020
Arno is a former Milwaukee-area skinhead; Pardeep is the son of a murdered Sikh. Together they formed an unlikely (or all-too-likely?) friendship hoping to bring healing, matching tattoos and all. A racist skinhead attacked a Sikh temple in the summer of 2012, murdering six people. Kaleka, a former police officer and teacher, was on his way to join his family there. Sadly, this is the only book I could find written about that shooting and the Sikh community in Wisconsin. Arno was a former violent skinhead who drifted away from the movement. His own self-published account “My Life After Hate” is a less polished but also less adulterated account of his youth, and some of those stories make their way here. I hope this book got assigned to high school students in the upper-midwest—it is great reading for simple truths about hate, reconciliation, and family. There’s much here that is moving. I learned a good bit about Sikh traditions and self-perceptions, and hope their partnership endures.
April 18, 2018
Having just watched the program “Active Shooter”, one episode covered the devastating and terrible events at the Sikh temple, in 2012. I was more than intrigued to read a book about these horrid events and the ability to find forgiveness.
This book did not disappoint. I appreciated how the book is written from the point of view of both men. Understanding the struggles each faced, in order to overcome their own personal struggles respectively was inspiring. It was a struggle at points reading about Arno’s hate riddled past, but inspiring reading about how he overcame.
The main lesson we can all take from this book is that LOVE can overcome hate, and forgiveness is always an option which allows us to grow and heal. From great pain, can come great strength and resilience.
I received an ARC copy in return for an honest review. Thank you to Netgalley, St. Martin’s Press, Pardeep S. Kaleka and Arno Michaelis for allowing me to read an ARC of this incredibly powerful story.
This book did not disappoint. I appreciated how the book is written from the point of view of both men. Understanding the struggles each faced, in order to overcome their own personal struggles respectively was inspiring. It was a struggle at points reading about Arno’s hate riddled past, but inspiring reading about how he overcame.
The main lesson we can all take from this book is that LOVE can overcome hate, and forgiveness is always an option which allows us to grow and heal. From great pain, can come great strength and resilience.
I received an ARC copy in return for an honest review. Thank you to Netgalley, St. Martin’s Press, Pardeep S. Kaleka and Arno Michaelis for allowing me to read an ARC of this incredibly powerful story.
June 22, 2018
In today’s world of intolerance and hate, it is a truly great gift to read a book where mutual understanding and care defeat the ugliness and help heal the pain. Uplifting and powerful. I truly enjoyed this book.
My thanks to NetGalley for providing me with an arc in exchange for my honest review.
My thanks to NetGalley for providing me with an arc in exchange for my honest review.
April 14, 2018
Engaging. Heartfelt. Important. Follows the life story of two men connected by the Sikh temple shooting in Oak Creek, WI and their important message of kindness and compassion in response to violence.
August 13, 2019
Very interesting. I learned about how someone may become radicalized and how he stopped. My favorite quote is when Arno explained why he got out of the white nationalism movement
He said, it was exhausting, hating all the time was exhausting.
He said, it was exhausting, hating all the time was exhausting.
April 10, 2018
A touching moving book of a friendship healing between a white supremacist and a peace loving Sikh.Told in both their voices a perfect book for today’s climate,
July 26, 2020
Everyone needs to read this book! It’s a powerful story with a very important message. The pain and suffering that Arno and Pardeep’s friendship was built on, is truly amazing.
May 28, 2020
"When ignorance isn't countered with wisdom, it festers and takes root in the hearts of the fearful. When hatred isn't cradled with kindness, it can corrupt the beauty of existence to the extreme that causing suffering is the only thing that makes sense anymore."
"I was suddenly hyperaware that I was a brown-skinned city kid in a school mostly made up of rural white kids. I even felt self-conscious around my white friends. When I tried talking to them about it, they told me a lot of what I was feeling was in my head. They didn't understand. How could they? As much as they cared about me, they couldn't know the isolation that someone of color felt when they were alone in an all-white world."
"Humankind just wasn't that simple. Yet in order to survive the trauma of policing you almost have to maintain that simplistic worldview because to lose it, as I was beginning to do, made you vulnerable in an unforgiving profession."
"He'd made the comparison between white supremacists and the Taliban and Al-Qaeda-people on the fringe who used terror and violence to gain attention and recruits."
"I was suddenly hyperaware that I was a brown-skinned city kid in a school mostly made up of rural white kids. I even felt self-conscious around my white friends. When I tried talking to them about it, they told me a lot of what I was feeling was in my head. They didn't understand. How could they? As much as they cared about me, they couldn't know the isolation that someone of color felt when they were alone in an all-white world."
"Humankind just wasn't that simple. Yet in order to survive the trauma of policing you almost have to maintain that simplistic worldview because to lose it, as I was beginning to do, made you vulnerable in an unforgiving profession."
"He'd made the comparison between white supremacists and the Taliban and Al-Qaeda-people on the fringe who used terror and violence to gain attention and recruits."
May 20, 2018
This is a memoir of two individuals, a former skinhead and a Sikh, who came together after a terrible tragedy to show that love can conquer hate. A must read about two individuals who often would not meet, let alone establish such a strong friendship and leadership.
May 31, 2018
I could not put this one down and sacrificed a couple of hours of sleep to finish it. This is a very important read and I cannot recommend it highly enough in this time of conflict and hate. These two men and their choices and their movement give me hope. It is not always an easy book to read and their is some language but the message is critical. At least read the excerpts I offer below, this is powerful stuff.
"Forgiveness is a sublime example of humanity that I explore at every opportunity. Because it was the unconditional forgiveness I was given by the people I once claimed to hate that demonstrated the way form there to here." -Arno Michaelis
"Forgiveness is the ultimate vengeance against hatred. 'Ek Onkar' means Our Creator is One. It is in this Sikh foundation that we are being called upon to respond with healing the wounds of the past." -Pardeep Singh Kaleka
"The bullet hole remains, now enshrined with a tiny plaque inscribed with the message WE ARE ONE. The victims were devout souls who strived to follow the tenets of their Sikh faith to live a meritorious life of honest hard work and service to others and God. Spiritual beings who graced this earth with love, inspiration, and Chardi Kala. Translated from Punjabi, the language of the Indian region where the Sikh religion was founded, Chardi Kala means 'relentless optimism.'"
"Monsters are not created by God. They are shaped by the society we live in. By us. The ingredients that make the monsters are hatred, suffering, isolation, and minimization. Seven people died that day, including the shooter, because one man's untreated suffering was inflamed by fear, ignorance, and rage. What if, instead, it had been met with compassion, courage, and wisdom?"
"Freedom is not an achievement but an opportunity." -Bhagat Puran Singh
"Ours is a gentle, benevolent faith. We believe that everyone is equal before one Creator and that a good life is lived truthfully and in service to others. Our scriptures don't dwell on what happens after death but focus on our earthly duties. From an early age, we are encouraged to live as sant-sipahi, those who strike a balance of cultivating spirituality while also contributing socially to our communities. We are bound by the Golden Rules of our religion, as taught by Guru Nanak Dev, the first Sikh Guru: Kirat Karo - work hard and honestly; Vand Chhako - share what you have with those who are less fortunate; Naam Jappo - always remember God throughout the day."
"Before becoming a Sikh, Muslim, Hindu, or Christian, let's become human first." -Guru Nanak Dev Ji
"One of the most important tenets of our Sikh faith is a practice we call Chardi Kala. Translated from Punjabi, it means living with 'relentless optimism'. We are taught that obstacles and hardships are not to be feared but embraced as stepping-stones toward the preordained plans God has for us. Chard Kala is what Sikhs strive for, a blissful mental state, even under difficult circumstances - as testimony to our unwavering belief in the will of God."
"A God-directed person never faces defeat." -Guru Nanak Dev Ji
"One day a particularly patient professor challenged me to appreciate the scriptures for the lessons and guidance they offered rather than scrutinize every detail."
"I set out to find flawed me but when I finally peered into myself, there was no man more flawed than me." -Kabir
"Truth is high, but higher yet is truthful living."-Guru Nanak Dev Ji
"The tongue is like a sharp knife; it kills without drawing blood." -Guru Nanak Dev Ji
"Falsehood may be practiced a hundred times; it is still false." -Guru Nanak Dev Ji
"No one is my enemy and no one is a stranger;
God exists in all beings." -Guru Nanak Dev Ji
"The blessed will grow a crop of forgiveness while the sufferers lose their roots." -Guru Ram Daas
"Let wisdom be your food and compassion be your guide." -Guru Nanak Dev Ji
"From Oneness came the many, and one day shall merge back into the One." -Guru Nanak Dev Ji
"My father was a deeply religious man whose dying words were a call to God to dispel darkness in the world with the light of love, compassion, and guidance. He died praying not for himself, but for this," I said, motioning towards the audience. "For you, the crowd that is here today in the spirit of love and understanding. And the next crowd. And the crowed after that. We have to be radically empathetic with each other, with the person next to us, with the person we just met today. Our message is to please commit to action for the betterment of humanity. My father and others died praying for that."
"Forgiveness is a sublime example of humanity that I explore at every opportunity. Because it was the unconditional forgiveness I was given by the people I once claimed to hate that demonstrated the way form there to here." -Arno Michaelis
"Forgiveness is the ultimate vengeance against hatred. 'Ek Onkar' means Our Creator is One. It is in this Sikh foundation that we are being called upon to respond with healing the wounds of the past." -Pardeep Singh Kaleka
"The bullet hole remains, now enshrined with a tiny plaque inscribed with the message WE ARE ONE. The victims were devout souls who strived to follow the tenets of their Sikh faith to live a meritorious life of honest hard work and service to others and God. Spiritual beings who graced this earth with love, inspiration, and Chardi Kala. Translated from Punjabi, the language of the Indian region where the Sikh religion was founded, Chardi Kala means 'relentless optimism.'"
"Monsters are not created by God. They are shaped by the society we live in. By us. The ingredients that make the monsters are hatred, suffering, isolation, and minimization. Seven people died that day, including the shooter, because one man's untreated suffering was inflamed by fear, ignorance, and rage. What if, instead, it had been met with compassion, courage, and wisdom?"
"Freedom is not an achievement but an opportunity." -Bhagat Puran Singh
"Ours is a gentle, benevolent faith. We believe that everyone is equal before one Creator and that a good life is lived truthfully and in service to others. Our scriptures don't dwell on what happens after death but focus on our earthly duties. From an early age, we are encouraged to live as sant-sipahi, those who strike a balance of cultivating spirituality while also contributing socially to our communities. We are bound by the Golden Rules of our religion, as taught by Guru Nanak Dev, the first Sikh Guru: Kirat Karo - work hard and honestly; Vand Chhako - share what you have with those who are less fortunate; Naam Jappo - always remember God throughout the day."
"Before becoming a Sikh, Muslim, Hindu, or Christian, let's become human first." -Guru Nanak Dev Ji
"One of the most important tenets of our Sikh faith is a practice we call Chardi Kala. Translated from Punjabi, it means living with 'relentless optimism'. We are taught that obstacles and hardships are not to be feared but embraced as stepping-stones toward the preordained plans God has for us. Chard Kala is what Sikhs strive for, a blissful mental state, even under difficult circumstances - as testimony to our unwavering belief in the will of God."
"A God-directed person never faces defeat." -Guru Nanak Dev Ji
"One day a particularly patient professor challenged me to appreciate the scriptures for the lessons and guidance they offered rather than scrutinize every detail."
"I set out to find flawed me but when I finally peered into myself, there was no man more flawed than me." -Kabir
"Truth is high, but higher yet is truthful living."-Guru Nanak Dev Ji
"The tongue is like a sharp knife; it kills without drawing blood." -Guru Nanak Dev Ji
"Falsehood may be practiced a hundred times; it is still false." -Guru Nanak Dev Ji
"No one is my enemy and no one is a stranger;
God exists in all beings." -Guru Nanak Dev Ji
"The blessed will grow a crop of forgiveness while the sufferers lose their roots." -Guru Ram Daas
"Let wisdom be your food and compassion be your guide." -Guru Nanak Dev Ji
"From Oneness came the many, and one day shall merge back into the One." -Guru Nanak Dev Ji
"My father was a deeply religious man whose dying words were a call to God to dispel darkness in the world with the light of love, compassion, and guidance. He died praying not for himself, but for this," I said, motioning towards the audience. "For you, the crowd that is here today in the spirit of love and understanding. And the next crowd. And the crowed after that. We have to be radically empathetic with each other, with the person next to us, with the person we just met today. Our message is to please commit to action for the betterment of humanity. My father and others died praying for that."
June 20, 2018
This is ultimately an uplifting book about a former "skinhead" and violent white supremacist, (Arno) who connects with a Sikh man (Pardeep), whose father was killed by a white supremacist in the Sikh Temple in Oak Creek, Wisconsin in 2012. The two men form a fragile friendship that deepens as they come to trust one another and eventually form an organization called Serve 2 Unite. They bring their message of peace, acceptance and reconciliation to schools and other organizations. Because of their individual experiences and later connection, they have had a big impact on young audiences in particular.
The narrative alternates between the early lives of both protagonists. Pardeep comes from a religiously observant Sikh family who migrated from India. His family was close and supportive, but they had little in terms of material wealth. His father worked long hours at a gas station, eventually owning the business and was known as a kindhearted neighbor who would help anyone in need. Pardeep was able to get an education and after receiving a degree attended the police academy. Although he worked for several years in the police department, he began to see that his spirit and attitude could be destroyed by the difficult work and felt he could make more of a difference helping young people. He eventually became a counselor. He married and had a family. He was devastated when a crazed white supremacist entered the Sikh Temple, killed 6 people and wounded others. Pardeep's father was among the dead. The gunman, Wade Michael Page killed himself.
Arno, it seems, grew up in a comfortable home with loving parents. Whatever the problem was-ADHD?, some sort of personality or mental disorder (nothing is defined or discussed in the book)-but he went off the rails at an early age. He had one experience that soured him on those of other races, where he had black kids he believed were his friends who did not come to his assistance when he was attacked. Maybe that was some sort of breaking point. In any case, he dropped out of high school,
did various menial jobs, including printing T shirts. He loved to drink, get drunk, get into fights and was influenced by others in developing the mentality of a raging white supremacist who believed he needed to attack the "mud" people to preserve the white race.
He founded a large skinhead organization, wrote hateful lyrics for his band and generally created mayhem and violence.
When his girlfriend became pregnant, they were living together and he was a doting father. Within a couple of years they separated and he took on the responsibility for his daughter. At some point in his chaotic, hate-filled, violent life, he realized that the credo of making the world safe for white children was ridiculous, if he as neglecting his own daughter!
This epiphany led to a real life change including abstaining from alcohol and working steadily and making a more normal life for them. He gave up his violent habits, and disengaged himself from his former companions. When he learned of the murders at the Sikh Temple he knew he had to take action and fight against the crimes he has previously committed.
He and Pardeep met. They talked and out of a tragedy their new organization developed.
I highly recommend this book. It explains a lot about the Sikh religion and also the mindset of those who would kill others because they were different. It's all about turning away from hate and towards inclusion and compassion for one another.
The narrative alternates between the early lives of both protagonists. Pardeep comes from a religiously observant Sikh family who migrated from India. His family was close and supportive, but they had little in terms of material wealth. His father worked long hours at a gas station, eventually owning the business and was known as a kindhearted neighbor who would help anyone in need. Pardeep was able to get an education and after receiving a degree attended the police academy. Although he worked for several years in the police department, he began to see that his spirit and attitude could be destroyed by the difficult work and felt he could make more of a difference helping young people. He eventually became a counselor. He married and had a family. He was devastated when a crazed white supremacist entered the Sikh Temple, killed 6 people and wounded others. Pardeep's father was among the dead. The gunman, Wade Michael Page killed himself.
Arno, it seems, grew up in a comfortable home with loving parents. Whatever the problem was-ADHD?, some sort of personality or mental disorder (nothing is defined or discussed in the book)-but he went off the rails at an early age. He had one experience that soured him on those of other races, where he had black kids he believed were his friends who did not come to his assistance when he was attacked. Maybe that was some sort of breaking point. In any case, he dropped out of high school,
did various menial jobs, including printing T shirts. He loved to drink, get drunk, get into fights and was influenced by others in developing the mentality of a raging white supremacist who believed he needed to attack the "mud" people to preserve the white race.
He founded a large skinhead organization, wrote hateful lyrics for his band and generally created mayhem and violence.
When his girlfriend became pregnant, they were living together and he was a doting father. Within a couple of years they separated and he took on the responsibility for his daughter. At some point in his chaotic, hate-filled, violent life, he realized that the credo of making the world safe for white children was ridiculous, if he as neglecting his own daughter!
This epiphany led to a real life change including abstaining from alcohol and working steadily and making a more normal life for them. He gave up his violent habits, and disengaged himself from his former companions. When he learned of the murders at the Sikh Temple he knew he had to take action and fight against the crimes he has previously committed.
He and Pardeep met. They talked and out of a tragedy their new organization developed.
I highly recommend this book. It explains a lot about the Sikh religion and also the mindset of those who would kill others because they were different. It's all about turning away from hate and towards inclusion and compassion for one another.
June 3, 2018
"What does hate look like? Hate looks like the bullet hole in the door frame leading into the prayer room at the Sikh Temple of Wisconsin—a vestige of the carnage that took place there on August 5, 2012, when a troubled man with a distorted view of what America should look like executed peaceful people inside."
Wow! This book filled me with so many emotions. I felt horror, anger, grief, disbelief, enlightenment, and hope all at the same time. The story is not just about the horrible incident that happened on August 5, 2012, in Milwaukee, Wisconsin, but about two unlikely men who came together to find answers, to find forgiveness, and to find ways to prevent this from happening again.
Pardeep Singh Kaleka's father was one of the 6 victims who died at the Sikh Temple that day. As a former policeman and as a teacher of at-risk kids he thought he had seen it all, but he was struggling to understand why someone would want to walk into a temple and gun down innocent men, women, and children. So, to find some answers, Pardeep met with Arno Michaelis, a former white supremacist who was one of the "founders of the same group that Pardeep's father's killer belonged to".
Arno Michaelis had been a "wild child" in his youth and at age 16 he got caught up in the racism that was prevalent in many areas of the U.S. At age 18 "he was the founding member of the largest white power skinhead organization in the world". His turning point was in his mid-twenties....his daughter, Autumn. His life's mission from then on was to practice loving kindness to all and he founded the non-profit organization, Life After Hate with the mission “to inspire compassion and forgiveness for all people”.
From their first several-hour-long meeting in a small Thai restaurant, Arno's and Pardeep's lives changed forever. Shortly after that first meeting, Pardeep asked Arno to speak at his temple where his father was murdered. And now, they work together as brothers "to bring forth the gift of their wounds".
Arno and Pardeep are both very humble and inspiring men and this book has given me hope for my country and for the world. This book is well-written in both Arno's and Pardeep's points of view. The depth of feeling about themselves, about each other, and about their cause is moving and encouraging, and I believe this book is important for everyone to read. The book will make you feel uncomfortable, angry and heartsick, and will force you to reflect on yourself and how you perceive others, but it also shows you kindness and forgiveness which will inspire the most dubious person. I recommend this book wholeheartedly!
Thank you to Mr. Michaelis and Mr. Kaleka for giving me an opportunity to voluntarily review their book provided free through NetGalley.
See more eclectic reviews on my blog at https://eclecticreview.wordpress.com/.
Wow! This book filled me with so many emotions. I felt horror, anger, grief, disbelief, enlightenment, and hope all at the same time. The story is not just about the horrible incident that happened on August 5, 2012, in Milwaukee, Wisconsin, but about two unlikely men who came together to find answers, to find forgiveness, and to find ways to prevent this from happening again.
Pardeep Singh Kaleka's father was one of the 6 victims who died at the Sikh Temple that day. As a former policeman and as a teacher of at-risk kids he thought he had seen it all, but he was struggling to understand why someone would want to walk into a temple and gun down innocent men, women, and children. So, to find some answers, Pardeep met with Arno Michaelis, a former white supremacist who was one of the "founders of the same group that Pardeep's father's killer belonged to".
Arno Michaelis had been a "wild child" in his youth and at age 16 he got caught up in the racism that was prevalent in many areas of the U.S. At age 18 "he was the founding member of the largest white power skinhead organization in the world". His turning point was in his mid-twenties....his daughter, Autumn. His life's mission from then on was to practice loving kindness to all and he founded the non-profit organization, Life After Hate with the mission “to inspire compassion and forgiveness for all people”.
From their first several-hour-long meeting in a small Thai restaurant, Arno's and Pardeep's lives changed forever. Shortly after that first meeting, Pardeep asked Arno to speak at his temple where his father was murdered. And now, they work together as brothers "to bring forth the gift of their wounds".
Arno and Pardeep are both very humble and inspiring men and this book has given me hope for my country and for the world. This book is well-written in both Arno's and Pardeep's points of view. The depth of feeling about themselves, about each other, and about their cause is moving and encouraging, and I believe this book is important for everyone to read. The book will make you feel uncomfortable, angry and heartsick, and will force you to reflect on yourself and how you perceive others, but it also shows you kindness and forgiveness which will inspire the most dubious person. I recommend this book wholeheartedly!
Thank you to Mr. Michaelis and Mr. Kaleka for giving me an opportunity to voluntarily review their book provided free through NetGalley.
See more eclectic reviews on my blog at https://eclecticreview.wordpress.com/.
October 4, 2018
A horrendous event brought two men together in a crusade to promote nonviolence and compassion, which they describe in "The Gift Of Our Wounds". Arno Michaels started out in life as a rebellious youth and went on to form a racist, skinhead organization aimed at protecting the white race. He delighted in violence. It was only when his daughter was born that he began to began to have a change of heart and to appreciate the goodness of others whom he'd once hated. Pardeep Kaleka, a Sikh whose family had emigrated to the US when he was a child, was devastated when a lone gunman entered the temple and killed his father and six other people. Arno felt responsible for at one time promoting the hatred which had led the gunman's action. He reached out to Pardeep. As Pardeep states at the end of the book: "I immediately noticed that we both bore open wounds. Wounds that we could not heal on our own. . . . uncomfortable as it was, (we) found the courage to share our stories and our pain."
The book alternates between the voices of the two men as they recount their life stories which led up to the tragedy, and beyond, as they formed an organization - Serve 2 Unite which, in Arno's words "grew into a forum to address hate with an ongoing practice of creativity and compassion rooted in the Sikh principles of oneness, service to others, and the pursuit of relentless optimism." The two men co-wrote the book with Robin Gaby Fisher, a New York Times best selling author.
I found the book absolutely absorbing. It gave me some understanding of the mindset of white supremacists but it also gave me hope that, through forgiveness and compassion, people CAN be led away from hatred to a path of peace and love. As Pardeep states at the beginning of the book: "Forgiveness is the ultimate vengeance against hatred."
The book alternates between the voices of the two men as they recount their life stories which led up to the tragedy, and beyond, as they formed an organization - Serve 2 Unite which, in Arno's words "grew into a forum to address hate with an ongoing practice of creativity and compassion rooted in the Sikh principles of oneness, service to others, and the pursuit of relentless optimism." The two men co-wrote the book with Robin Gaby Fisher, a New York Times best selling author.
I found the book absolutely absorbing. It gave me some understanding of the mindset of white supremacists but it also gave me hope that, through forgiveness and compassion, people CAN be led away from hatred to a path of peace and love. As Pardeep states at the beginning of the book: "Forgiveness is the ultimate vengeance against hatred."
April 21, 2018
I got a copy of this recently released book from NetGalley. It tells the story of 2 men who become friends while trying to work together to combat hate and promote peace. Pardeep Kaleka is a Sikh man who moved to Wisconsin, USA from India. His family owned a gas station and was highly involved in their Sikh Temple. Arno Michealis is a former white supremacist. After having a daughter, he turns his life around after years of violent behavior, addiction and promoting hate. He vows to attempt to make things right to help undo the years of damage he has caused.
In 2012, Pardeep's father was killed by a white supremacist while worshipping. Pardeep, who had worked as a cop and as a teacher, wants to educate people about the Sikh religion and help people to reconcile differences. Arno Michaelis, after leaving his organization Life After Hate, begins working with Pardeep in an organization called Strive 2 Unite, which works with students to promote understanding and a non-violent culture in our schools and communities.
I enjoyed the stories of these 2 men. I do not have many Sikhs in my area so it was nice to hear firsthand what some of their beliefs are. Arno's story was also very honest and I appreciated his transparency. There are quite a few swears in the book if that bothers you or if you have young kids who might pick it up. I think this is a good read if you want to get an honest perspective on how other people think. I would've liked to hear about the project that some of the students write about in their reviews of Strive 2 Unite.
In 2012, Pardeep's father was killed by a white supremacist while worshipping. Pardeep, who had worked as a cop and as a teacher, wants to educate people about the Sikh religion and help people to reconcile differences. Arno Michaelis, after leaving his organization Life After Hate, begins working with Pardeep in an organization called Strive 2 Unite, which works with students to promote understanding and a non-violent culture in our schools and communities.
I enjoyed the stories of these 2 men. I do not have many Sikhs in my area so it was nice to hear firsthand what some of their beliefs are. Arno's story was also very honest and I appreciated his transparency. There are quite a few swears in the book if that bothers you or if you have young kids who might pick it up. I think this is a good read if you want to get an honest perspective on how other people think. I would've liked to hear about the project that some of the students write about in their reviews of Strive 2 Unite.
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