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Grand Theft Octo
When Jonathan Doe is fired from his office job for stealing too much stationery, he becomes an entrepreneur of businesses the world has never seen. After a disastrous start at freelance taxidermy, he moves onto professional octopus teasing. Will he fail again or make his fortune? Is he really a professional or just a con artist? Desperate to succeed, his plans become more outlandish, from stealing theme park mascots at gunpoint to fighting deranged restaurant tycoons. As the enemies he makes seek revenge, both his life and business are threatened, until his world spirals into mayhem and violence. Set in the fictional city of Vestibue, England, Grand Theft Octo is a wild and hilarious ride that strikes at the heart of aspirational culture.
191 pages, Paperback
First published April 29, 2017
54 people are currently reading
848 people want to read
About the author
Niels Saunders
14 books75 followersNiels Saunders wrote his first book when he was sixteen and hasn't stopped since. Born in Cambridge, he grew up in Devon and has lived in Canterbury, Brighton and Tokyo. He loves to write in many genres including fantasy, thriller and comedy. His short stories have been published in Ambit and Chapman magazines and he was awarded a distinction for the Creative and Critical Writing MA at the University of Sussex. When he's not writing or reading, you'll find him smoking meat, watching films or playing video games. His fantasy series, The Legend of Saru, was finished in 2024.
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Displaying 1 - 26 of 26 reviews
May 7, 2018
Stealing was always my hobby. Now it's my profession.
Johnathan Doe is a con man. And a thief. And a liar. Don't trust him to water your plants while you're away. In fact, don't trust him at all.
The whole world's open for business. I only need to be trusted.
After his "career" as a freelance taxidermist goes bust, he decides to launch a newprofession scam as a professional octopus teaser. Naturally, this will involve a trip to an amusement park to steal one of the roaming mascots, and, well . . . that's when things begin to get a little crazy crazier.
This is a weird, wacky tale that made me laugh, and occasionally touched my heart with its rubbery tentacles. Jon Doe, while certainly not a gentleman, is definitely a philosopher, and quite the original thinker. Here is yet another of his many, many pearls of wisdom:
. . . a lie's like a secret. It only exists when exposed and a lie that's believed is the truth.
Perhaps the author will pen a sequel in which Mr. Doe enters the world of politics.
And now, this:
Johnathan Doe is a con man. And a thief. And a liar. Don't trust him to water your plants while you're away. In fact, don't trust him at all.
The whole world's open for business. I only need to be trusted.
After his "career" as a freelance taxidermist goes bust, he decides to launch a new
This is a weird, wacky tale that made me laugh, and occasionally touched my heart with its rubbery tentacles. Jon Doe, while certainly not a gentleman, is definitely a philosopher, and quite the original thinker. Here is yet another of his many, many pearls of wisdom:
. . . a lie's like a secret. It only exists when exposed and a lie that's believed is the truth.
Perhaps the author will pen a sequel in which Mr. Doe enters the world of politics.
And now, this:
March 9, 2018
Totally crazy but good
Grand Theft October is a book for those with a strange sense of humor...that's me! Jonathan Doe is a very weird fellow and gets fired for stealing from work...her stole staples, pens, paper...and constantly flushed the toilet, yep, he is different. His friends are just as different. He tries jobs he is not qualified for and knows it but doesn't care. It gets him into strange situations. The arch villain is also weird. A crazy but clever story for the odd.
Grand Theft October is a book for those with a strange sense of humor...that's me! Jonathan Doe is a very weird fellow and gets fired for stealing from work...her stole staples, pens, paper...and constantly flushed the toilet, yep, he is different. His friends are just as different. He tries jobs he is not qualified for and knows it but doesn't care. It gets him into strange situations. The arch villain is also weird. A crazy but clever story for the odd.
August 12, 2017
Grand Theft Octo by Neils Saunders
I must admit that I was attracted to the book’s cover and title initially, and I was intrigued by what the title was suggesting about the story. The title of the book did not disappoint. Upon reading the first chapter, I was hooked. With a hilarious background into Jonathan Doe’s life, I get a good glimpse into how this story will unfold.
A con man, freelancer, entrepreneur, and opportunist, Jonathan Doe is a man with a plan to become a success. Having gotten sacked from his job for an overconsumption of office supplies, he immediately begins his first con. He dupes Harry Jenkins, a failed restaurant owner of The Burger Lounge, into believing that he’s a horticulturalist so that he can care for his plants while he’s away. With a base for hatching his plans, Doe moves in to Harry’s flat and begins advertising his services. First as a freelance taxidermist, and later as a brilliantly conceived professional octopus teaser. Doe has the unfortunate circumstance of attracting the attention of Lewis Caputo, escrow, a man of violence, and the story’s villain, in his first attempt as a freelance taxidermist. Each succeeding interaction with Caputo leads to increasingly violent acts that leave Doe in some level of disrepair. Desperate to make a success of himself, Doe goes to great lengths to do whatever it takes to make it at any costs.
The events that take place in the first half of the book are hilarious. The idea of octopus teasing, a truly funny idea because who would think that was actually a thing. Quite original and refreshingly unpredictable, I’m glad that I read this book. After the first half however, the story took a dark turn that I wasn’t prepared for. I continued reading because after some investment in cheering on Doe’s character, I wanted him to arise unscathed. The story unfolded to be one of great loss, grief, revenge and resilience wrapped up in an unlikely story of an octopus teaser.
The supporting characters in the story were somewhat flat. I wanted to know more about the life of Sarashina, Hank Butterfield and their child, but we are only given a glimpse of the life that was before we are yanked back into the present. I wanted to experience Herb’s character more and learn more about his grief over the loss of his parents as a child. But, we are given just enough about the characters to enhance the story of Doe, because, at 193 pages there’s only so much room you can devote to supporting characters that doesn’t take away from the plot of the main character. No complaints as far as that goes, however, the ending left me wondering if I’d missed something. Because of this I re-read the first two chapters of the book looking for clues as to whether the twist made sense. I won’t divulge what that is except that upon my evaluation, the name of the main character, Jonathan Doe, fit perfectly.
I look forward to reading more from author Neils Saunders in the future.
A-rating
Title: Grand Theft Oct0
Author: Neils Saunders
Publisher: Imperial Press
Publication Date: May 5, 2017
Pages: 193
Disclosure: I received a free copy of this book and give an honest review.
I must admit that I was attracted to the book’s cover and title initially, and I was intrigued by what the title was suggesting about the story. The title of the book did not disappoint. Upon reading the first chapter, I was hooked. With a hilarious background into Jonathan Doe’s life, I get a good glimpse into how this story will unfold.
A con man, freelancer, entrepreneur, and opportunist, Jonathan Doe is a man with a plan to become a success. Having gotten sacked from his job for an overconsumption of office supplies, he immediately begins his first con. He dupes Harry Jenkins, a failed restaurant owner of The Burger Lounge, into believing that he’s a horticulturalist so that he can care for his plants while he’s away. With a base for hatching his plans, Doe moves in to Harry’s flat and begins advertising his services. First as a freelance taxidermist, and later as a brilliantly conceived professional octopus teaser. Doe has the unfortunate circumstance of attracting the attention of Lewis Caputo, escrow, a man of violence, and the story’s villain, in his first attempt as a freelance taxidermist. Each succeeding interaction with Caputo leads to increasingly violent acts that leave Doe in some level of disrepair. Desperate to make a success of himself, Doe goes to great lengths to do whatever it takes to make it at any costs.
The events that take place in the first half of the book are hilarious. The idea of octopus teasing, a truly funny idea because who would think that was actually a thing. Quite original and refreshingly unpredictable, I’m glad that I read this book. After the first half however, the story took a dark turn that I wasn’t prepared for. I continued reading because after some investment in cheering on Doe’s character, I wanted him to arise unscathed. The story unfolded to be one of great loss, grief, revenge and resilience wrapped up in an unlikely story of an octopus teaser.
The supporting characters in the story were somewhat flat. I wanted to know more about the life of Sarashina, Hank Butterfield and their child, but we are only given a glimpse of the life that was before we are yanked back into the present. I wanted to experience Herb’s character more and learn more about his grief over the loss of his parents as a child. But, we are given just enough about the characters to enhance the story of Doe, because, at 193 pages there’s only so much room you can devote to supporting characters that doesn’t take away from the plot of the main character. No complaints as far as that goes, however, the ending left me wondering if I’d missed something. Because of this I re-read the first two chapters of the book looking for clues as to whether the twist made sense. I won’t divulge what that is except that upon my evaluation, the name of the main character, Jonathan Doe, fit perfectly.
I look forward to reading more from author Neils Saunders in the future.
A-rating
Title: Grand Theft Oct0
Author: Neils Saunders
Publisher: Imperial Press
Publication Date: May 5, 2017
Pages: 193
Disclosure: I received a free copy of this book and give an honest review.
September 6, 2017
Much More Than Just A Silly Lark, This Is A Beautifully Constructed Treat
Blurbs and promotions for this book suggest that it will be a bit of a lark, as we follow a con man on his odd and outlandish journey to shake down marks in the guise of a professional octopus teaser. You think to yourself that this could be fun, with maybe a charming rascal of a grifter hero and some sly humor at the expense of entrepreneurs, the idle moneyed class, and the like. Probably there will be plenty of colorful characters. Well, all of the above applies, but it's only a tease and does not at all do justice to how fine and compelling this book is.
The book goes through a number of transformations as it develops. We start with Jonathan Doe being fired for pocketing office supplies. We follow his short history as a freelance taxidermist. In these first few chapters we are treated to a number of underplayed and deadpan funny scenes that suggest that this will be a dry and witty bit of satire, perhaps at Jonathan's expense. But then the book opens up a bit. A nasty and threatening criminal figure with exaggerated energy, flair, and instability arrives on the scene, and the book feels like it's going to go somewhere darker. But then we switch to a mad kidnapping of an octopus mascot from a play park and to Jonathan's first octopus teasing, and matters lighten up and get fairly silly again, even if some of the humor has taken on a darker shade.
But wait. That early threat of imminent unbalanced violence was real. The book goes into some very dark places, and it begins to take on the feel of those weird/bizarro books that balance manic humor with explicit violence. There is more than a hint of works like "Clockwork Orange", with humor, the mundane, psychotic nastiness, and the inexplicable all mixed together in an unnerving but fascinating and compelling fashion.
And that's just the top level. WARNING. GENERAL OVERALL VAGUE SPOILER. The ending will come as more or less of a surprise depending on how carefully you read the book. Suffice to say that as soon as I finished the book I turned back to the beginning in order to browse through it again in order to tease out the second, entirely different, (and in some ways better), book that was hidden between the lines.
So, don't dismiss this as a bit of caper/con-man silliness. This is a rewarding, entertaining, keen, wise, and exceptionally well crafted novella. A wonderful find.
(Please note that I received a free ecopy of this book without a review requirement, or any influence regarding review content should I choose to post a review. Apart from that I have no connection at all to either the author or the publisher of this book.)
Blurbs and promotions for this book suggest that it will be a bit of a lark, as we follow a con man on his odd and outlandish journey to shake down marks in the guise of a professional octopus teaser. You think to yourself that this could be fun, with maybe a charming rascal of a grifter hero and some sly humor at the expense of entrepreneurs, the idle moneyed class, and the like. Probably there will be plenty of colorful characters. Well, all of the above applies, but it's only a tease and does not at all do justice to how fine and compelling this book is.
The book goes through a number of transformations as it develops. We start with Jonathan Doe being fired for pocketing office supplies. We follow his short history as a freelance taxidermist. In these first few chapters we are treated to a number of underplayed and deadpan funny scenes that suggest that this will be a dry and witty bit of satire, perhaps at Jonathan's expense. But then the book opens up a bit. A nasty and threatening criminal figure with exaggerated energy, flair, and instability arrives on the scene, and the book feels like it's going to go somewhere darker. But then we switch to a mad kidnapping of an octopus mascot from a play park and to Jonathan's first octopus teasing, and matters lighten up and get fairly silly again, even if some of the humor has taken on a darker shade.
But wait. That early threat of imminent unbalanced violence was real. The book goes into some very dark places, and it begins to take on the feel of those weird/bizarro books that balance manic humor with explicit violence. There is more than a hint of works like "Clockwork Orange", with humor, the mundane, psychotic nastiness, and the inexplicable all mixed together in an unnerving but fascinating and compelling fashion.
And that's just the top level. WARNING. GENERAL OVERALL VAGUE SPOILER. The ending will come as more or less of a surprise depending on how carefully you read the book. Suffice to say that as soon as I finished the book I turned back to the beginning in order to browse through it again in order to tease out the second, entirely different, (and in some ways better), book that was hidden between the lines.
So, don't dismiss this as a bit of caper/con-man silliness. This is a rewarding, entertaining, keen, wise, and exceptionally well crafted novella. A wonderful find.
(Please note that I received a free ecopy of this book without a review requirement, or any influence regarding review content should I choose to post a review. Apart from that I have no connection at all to either the author or the publisher of this book.)
October 29, 2017
I received a copy of this book from the author in exchange for an honest review. Honesty from the outset: before reading, I didn't believe the ludicrous scenario described in the blurb could possibly hold up for anything longer than a Monty Python sketch; certainly not a novel-length work. Boy, was I wrong! This zany farce of a book is hilarious, weird, and by the end, deeply moving.
Protagonist Jonathan Doe is a gleefully dishonest fellow cooking up deluded schemes to separate the overprivileged from their money. He moves from pilfering absurd amounts of office supplies (which gets him fired) to plant watering for one Harry Jenkins (which he doesn't do, with the obvious result) to freelance taxidermy, which requires skills and material he doesn't have and brings him into the orbit of the outrageously weird Lewis Caputo, Escrow; Herbert Malt, Intern; and the beautiful, mysterious (and also weird) Holly Sarashina, Taxidermist. When Doe sets himself up as a professional octopus teaser, he approaches his scam like a business, taking on Herbert as his apprentice and pouring the proceeds (yes, he does get clients) into elaborate advertisements. I found it easy to root for someone so devoted to his made-up profession, which it turns out he has a talent for. Jonathan Doe is a scammer, but a lovable scammer.
Then he discovers he has a competitor—make that nemesis—and the story veers into a dark place without breaking zany character. Doe and a small team of trusted friends, including an octopus named Percy, venture into real, if outlandish, peril in order to put a stop to the evil lurking in their city. In so doing, they bring this wacky story to a place of honest emotional depth and an unexpected but satisfying ending that is subtly foreshadowed from the start.
If you can handle a comedy about trauma and loss, I highly recommend Grand Theft Octo.
Protagonist Jonathan Doe is a gleefully dishonest fellow cooking up deluded schemes to separate the overprivileged from their money. He moves from pilfering absurd amounts of office supplies (which gets him fired) to plant watering for one Harry Jenkins (which he doesn't do, with the obvious result) to freelance taxidermy, which requires skills and material he doesn't have and brings him into the orbit of the outrageously weird Lewis Caputo, Escrow; Herbert Malt, Intern; and the beautiful, mysterious (and also weird) Holly Sarashina, Taxidermist. When Doe sets himself up as a professional octopus teaser, he approaches his scam like a business, taking on Herbert as his apprentice and pouring the proceeds (yes, he does get clients) into elaborate advertisements. I found it easy to root for someone so devoted to his made-up profession, which it turns out he has a talent for. Jonathan Doe is a scammer, but a lovable scammer.
Then he discovers he has a competitor—make that nemesis—and the story veers into a dark place without breaking zany character. Doe and a small team of trusted friends, including an octopus named Percy, venture into real, if outlandish, peril in order to put a stop to the evil lurking in their city. In so doing, they bring this wacky story to a place of honest emotional depth and an unexpected but satisfying ending that is subtly foreshadowed from the start.
If you can handle a comedy about trauma and loss, I highly recommend Grand Theft Octo.
May 31, 2017
What starts of as a fun trip to crazy town takes a dark turn into horrified fascination. Jonathan Doe is a con-man selling whatever it is you’re willing to buy, be that an assurance your plants will be fine while you’re away or that your octopus is in dire need of teasing. He’s brimming with self-assurance, fun, insane and somehow manages to bend the world to his will while at the same time failing hugely in whatever he’s doing.
The failing part is largely due to Caputo, the hotdog in the middle. Just as in what happens to the story, Caputo will take all your fun and crazy and twist it into something unpleasant and violent.
Jonathan Doe is charming and funny, at first appearing superficial but as he reels from one situation to another it becomes clear there’s more to him than meets the eye… while at the same time he continues to be… well, superficial.
The failing part is largely due to Caputo, the hotdog in the middle. Just as in what happens to the story, Caputo will take all your fun and crazy and twist it into something unpleasant and violent.
Jonathan Doe is charming and funny, at first appearing superficial but as he reels from one situation to another it becomes clear there’s more to him than meets the eye… while at the same time he continues to be… well, superficial.
August 29, 2017
This book is a gem.
I was drawn in by the title and quirky description, and I was not left disappointed. This book should really be made into a Wes Anderson movie. I get like half Wed Anderson and half Chuck Palahniuk from this book.
The writing is engaging and quirky, and the characters are believable without too much forced exposition. I'll definitely be following this author. I mean he wrote a book about a guy who goes into business teasing octopuses (-pi, -podes) and by the end it seemed totally normal.
Well done Mr Saunders!
I was drawn in by the title and quirky description, and I was not left disappointed. This book should really be made into a Wes Anderson movie. I get like half Wed Anderson and half Chuck Palahniuk from this book.
The writing is engaging and quirky, and the characters are believable without too much forced exposition. I'll definitely be following this author. I mean he wrote a book about a guy who goes into business teasing octopuses (-pi, -podes) and by the end it seemed totally normal.
Well done Mr Saunders!
September 30, 2017
I kept seeing this book pop up in the giveaways section and decided that I just had to have it, so I popped over to Amazon and snatched a copy. It was unique and wildly entertaining! And surprisingly very touching at moments. A thoroughly enjoyable read. On a personal note, I once bought a pet octopus for an ex -he and my brother poked the poor thing over and over to make it ink, and it died within a couple hours of having it. I'm glad the protagonist of this story was a much better octopus teaser than they were.
October 1, 2017
This was definitely a different book than the usual fiction. It makes the reader ask themselves lots and lots of questions, and then even question those answers as it goes along in their search for who they are and what they really need to do in life to make themselves feel complete. The answers are fun and amusing in coming. This is a voluntary review of an Advanced Reader Copy of this book.
August 23, 2017
No review I could write could possibly do this book justice. I went into it expecting some wild, funny, incredible tale. I got that, but the story quickly evolved into something way more complex, and ultimately rather sinister. It's hilarious, heart-breaking, intellectual, devastating, scary, all in one. I'll definitely have to read it again, and everything else the author has in store.
March 16, 2018
This book far exceeded my expectations. I don’t know why I had my doubts, but that soon changed after reading only a few pages. Amazingly funny. Saunders can really write. His prose flows seamlessly. Recommended if you have even a slight sense of humor.
March 14, 2018
📚📚📚📘
The first half of the book was a bit daft and I started to wonder where the story was going, but I'm glad I didn't give up as the second half totally made up for it, becoming very strong and emotional.
The first half of the book was a bit daft and I started to wonder where the story was going, but I'm glad I didn't give up as the second half totally made up for it, becoming very strong and emotional.
February 17, 2020
A fun tale about a man trying to reinvent himself through lies and trickery and getting caught up in a wanna be crime boss, a tragic love story, and an octopus rehabilitation racket. And not of word of this is untrue. A relatively simple read, but with lots of, wait, what just happen, thrown to keep you turning the pages. This story will take you through the gambit of emotions in an afternnoon read and leave you with a warm feeling in the end.
August 7, 2017
At times the standard 9-to-5 grind is a soul-sucking drag and entrepreneurial occupations are more appealing and fulfilling, as explored within Grand Theft Octo by Niels Saunders.
To read this, and other book reviews, visit my website: http://makinggoodstories.wordpress.com/.
Jonathan Doe is staying at his co-worker Harry's flat while looking after his copious plants (which all have names, nicknames, and particular personalities), having assured Harry that he formerly cared for plants professionally. But in reality Jonathan is trying to forge his path to fortune through freelance taxidermy, despite having no experience in it. After taking a job that brings him into the orbit of Lewis Caputo, a man who has power in the city and the gumption to profit from the ideas and work of others, Jonathan finds that his taxidermy days are over and instead turns to professional octopus teasing. In getting this new enterprise running, Jonathan has eccentric plans to obtain the materials he needs as well as to inspire life into languid octopods, which gains the attention of Caputo and gets Jonathan involved in a revealing and violent scheme for revenge.
Quick-moving and captivating, the quirkiness of the entrepreneurial premises were entertaining while the narrative insightfully probed the psychological rifts within the characters that made the outlandish seem rational. Injecting quick wit and humor into dark and dangerous situations provides a tenuous balance to the range of emotions presented in the story and prevents it from being entirely unbeliveable. From the relatively obvious clues dropped throughout the narrative that continued cropping up, I was prepared for the ending's reveal and found it to be satisfying and appropriate for the odd events of the story.
*I received this book from the author in exchange for an honest review.
To read this, and other book reviews, visit my website: http://makinggoodstories.wordpress.com/.
Jonathan Doe is staying at his co-worker Harry's flat while looking after his copious plants (which all have names, nicknames, and particular personalities), having assured Harry that he formerly cared for plants professionally. But in reality Jonathan is trying to forge his path to fortune through freelance taxidermy, despite having no experience in it. After taking a job that brings him into the orbit of Lewis Caputo, a man who has power in the city and the gumption to profit from the ideas and work of others, Jonathan finds that his taxidermy days are over and instead turns to professional octopus teasing. In getting this new enterprise running, Jonathan has eccentric plans to obtain the materials he needs as well as to inspire life into languid octopods, which gains the attention of Caputo and gets Jonathan involved in a revealing and violent scheme for revenge.
Quick-moving and captivating, the quirkiness of the entrepreneurial premises were entertaining while the narrative insightfully probed the psychological rifts within the characters that made the outlandish seem rational. Injecting quick wit and humor into dark and dangerous situations provides a tenuous balance to the range of emotions presented in the story and prevents it from being entirely unbeliveable. From the relatively obvious clues dropped throughout the narrative that continued cropping up, I was prepared for the ending's reveal and found it to be satisfying and appropriate for the odd events of the story.
*I received this book from the author in exchange for an honest review.
August 9, 2023
I started reading this today.... and 2.5 hours later I close it and think "WTF did I just read?" Never has the phrase 'well that escalated quickly' been so appropriate.
Books is good and amusing, would definitely recommend it to people who like dark comedies. And I mean dark... none of this slight tinges of grey or white and fluffy around the edges. It is a fast-paced crazy rollercoaster ride.
It hooks you in with the first chapter ... but throughout it, I just kept thinking 'OMFG! I'm trapped in a car on a roadtrip with a manic depressive who is off their meds and obsessed with octopodes!!'.
Thank you to Netgallery for an ARC.
Books is good and amusing, would definitely recommend it to people who like dark comedies. And I mean dark... none of this slight tinges of grey or white and fluffy around the edges. It is a fast-paced crazy rollercoaster ride.
It hooks you in with the first chapter ... but throughout it, I just kept thinking 'OMFG! I'm trapped in a car on a roadtrip with a manic depressive who is off their meds and obsessed with octopodes!!'.
Thank you to Netgallery for an ARC.
June 11, 2017
I admit it I was sucked in by the title and the cover art. This book was equally ridiculous as it was dark. I never quite liked the characters. It started out promising. I thought there were funny moments and unusual ideas that were interesting, but overall I couldn't love it.
After a few failed attempts at taking money for doing mostly nothing, Johnathan Doe invents a new con. Octopus Teaser. He would agitate pet octopi while spinning stories for their rich owners. A crime boss gets involved and people get hurt.
I liked the promotional card:
"Whats the matter? Got a boring octopus?"
I disliked the funeral where the author unleashed a paragraph of anger on God.
After a few failed attempts at taking money for doing mostly nothing, Johnathan Doe invents a new con. Octopus Teaser. He would agitate pet octopi while spinning stories for their rich owners. A crime boss gets involved and people get hurt.
I liked the promotional card:
"Whats the matter? Got a boring octopus?"
I disliked the funeral where the author unleashed a paragraph of anger on God.
October 16, 2017
What the actual eff have I just read?
Grand Theft Octo is a very strange book which seems to have little purpose to get from beginning to end. It really has no clear narrative path to reach a goal.
It is similar in style to Youth in Revolt and Jonathan Doe seems to be a similar character to Nick Twisp. I didn’t enjoy Youth in Revolt and I didn’t enjoy Grand Theft Octo.
This is 191 pages of my reading life that I will never get back. Sad times.
Grand Theft Octo by Niels Saunders is available now.
For more information regarding Niels Saunders (@Nielzor) please visit www.nielssaunders.com.
Grand Theft Octo is a very strange book which seems to have little purpose to get from beginning to end. It really has no clear narrative path to reach a goal.
It is similar in style to Youth in Revolt and Jonathan Doe seems to be a similar character to Nick Twisp. I didn’t enjoy Youth in Revolt and I didn’t enjoy Grand Theft Octo.
This is 191 pages of my reading life that I will never get back. Sad times.
Grand Theft Octo by Niels Saunders is available now.
For more information regarding Niels Saunders (@Nielzor) please visit www.nielssaunders.com.
June 11, 2017
Well written, gets kinda dark
I really enjoyed the first part of this book for its writing and humor. By the time things turned serious, I was too invested to stop reading. I kind of wish I was warned about the more serious things that happen, but then I might have never read it.
It's really a good story and well told. Just, make sure you read it when you're not feeling fragile. I'll definitely be looking forward to more books by this author.
I really enjoyed the first part of this book for its writing and humor. By the time things turned serious, I was too invested to stop reading. I kind of wish I was warned about the more serious things that happen, but then I might have never read it.
It's really a good story and well told. Just, make sure you read it when you're not feeling fragile. I'll definitely be looking forward to more books by this author.
May 9, 2017
I read Niels' first book, Mervyn v. Dennis, and enjoyed it immensely. this author has a quirky sense of humour, easy to read, but with hidden, and not so hidden depths. I consider this one to be even better - it is funny, sad, inventive, different. I found the ending to be completely satisfying, if left me wanting more - looking forward to the next book!
March 26, 2018
The protagonist of this book is an entrepreneur who. at the beginning of the book is a plant sitter, caring for a house full of plants while the owner is away. Unfortunately, he managed to kill every plant in the house. So, seeing that plant sitting was not his strong suit, he moved on to his next big idea: octopus teasing. It seems octopus owners have a common problem, that being lethargic octopi. Our hero goes in with a variety of kitchen gadgets and stimulates the critters, pleasing both the octopus and the owners. Along the way, though, he manages to piss off a mob boss, which greatly complicates his life.
As you can tell, this is no ordinary book. For that i give it high marks. I genuinely liked almost everything about this book. There's no depth to it, but that's fine. It didn't pretend to be anything other than an amusing tale. And that it was.
As you can tell, this is no ordinary book. For that i give it high marks. I genuinely liked almost everything about this book. There's no depth to it, but that's fine. It didn't pretend to be anything other than an amusing tale. And that it was.
June 13, 2020
This is maybe the strangest book I've ever read. I thought it was supposed to be funny, but it just kept getting less funny, and more sad, and more weird..... If there was a 1.5 star rating, I'd give it that, because while I didn't like it, I suppose there is a bit of a sad wake-up call buried within for many people that could be useful.
March 11, 2018
Dark humor
If you are a fan of dark humor, this book is for you. Johnathan Doe is a sociopath. He is a liar and a thief. When he loses one job, he advertises himself as something else. This is a litany of his reinventions and the trouble that finds him.
If you are a fan of dark humor, this book is for you. Johnathan Doe is a sociopath. He is a liar and a thief. When he loses one job, he advertises himself as something else. This is a litany of his reinventions and the trouble that finds him.
January 11, 2021
Fun little book. Sometimes too obsessed with being weird, sometimes not obsessed enough. Trust me, read it, that makes sense
May 24, 2018
I don't want to say too much in this review because, basically, this just wasn't my bag. It's well written on a sentence by sentence level, but I didn't enjoy the content much. It did get a little better in the final fifth.
August 12, 2019
Jonathan Doe is a conman, and as he himself says, Stealing was always my hobby. Now it’s my profession.
After being fired from his office job for rampant stealing of office supplies, he lands an outrageously lucrative gig house/plant-sitting, and the story begins when he places an ad in the local newspaper for anyone in need of a freelance taxidermist.
He cancels the taxidermy ad, however, once it’s patently obvious that slipshod taxidermy is a huge, stinky pain in the ass, and he pivots to professional octopus teasing, a possibly ingenious concept with unbelievable potential, and the wild ride continues.
Grand Theft Octo is a fast-paced, entertaining story that begins with oddball capers but later mixes in elements of revenge, love, and redemption. Saunders has created a captivating cast of characters including a badass hottie, a seemingly perfect yet psychologically tortured actor, and an eccentric yet cutthroat villain.
It is very well written with an abundance of shrewd lines such as, a lie that’s believed is the truth, which could not be more relevant as one of the biggest conmen of all time currently works out of the Oval Office.
Saunders also has an excellent sense of humor as I found myself chuckling throughout. And since we share an affinity for juvenile wordplay like, He really puts the ass into assistant, I have to say that there is absolutely no poo in this lampoon.
Please note that this book is not really a lampoon of anything per se, but I wracked my brain for a suitable gag and that’s the best I could come up with. Stupid brain.
To sum up, Grand Theft Octo is creative, interesting, and insightful. It’s not gut-splittingly funny, but there are plenty of chuckles to be had, and as Saunders shows great promise, it’s only a matter of time before he unleashes a wickedly funny masterpiece. 4 Stars.
Bonus quote #1: Kids are simple creatures, ruled by greed and fear and an eternal reluctance to go to the toilet.
Bonus quote #2: The best way to coerce people is through guilt and fear. It’s why religion’s done such smashing business for thousands of years.
Bonus quote #3: Life’s not a performance, it’s a dress rehearsal: people on an unfinished stage who don’t quite know what they’re doing, getting their lines wrong and never fully in character. Everyone’s an amateur, an understudy, we just get better at hiding it.
For more reviews, check out The Comedic Novel Review at www.pearlsbeforeswine68.com which is also home to the Great White Host Blog.
After being fired from his office job for rampant stealing of office supplies, he lands an outrageously lucrative gig house/plant-sitting, and the story begins when he places an ad in the local newspaper for anyone in need of a freelance taxidermist.
He cancels the taxidermy ad, however, once it’s patently obvious that slipshod taxidermy is a huge, stinky pain in the ass, and he pivots to professional octopus teasing, a possibly ingenious concept with unbelievable potential, and the wild ride continues.
Grand Theft Octo is a fast-paced, entertaining story that begins with oddball capers but later mixes in elements of revenge, love, and redemption. Saunders has created a captivating cast of characters including a badass hottie, a seemingly perfect yet psychologically tortured actor, and an eccentric yet cutthroat villain.
It is very well written with an abundance of shrewd lines such as, a lie that’s believed is the truth, which could not be more relevant as one of the biggest conmen of all time currently works out of the Oval Office.
Saunders also has an excellent sense of humor as I found myself chuckling throughout. And since we share an affinity for juvenile wordplay like, He really puts the ass into assistant, I have to say that there is absolutely no poo in this lampoon.
Please note that this book is not really a lampoon of anything per se, but I wracked my brain for a suitable gag and that’s the best I could come up with. Stupid brain.
To sum up, Grand Theft Octo is creative, interesting, and insightful. It’s not gut-splittingly funny, but there are plenty of chuckles to be had, and as Saunders shows great promise, it’s only a matter of time before he unleashes a wickedly funny masterpiece. 4 Stars.
Bonus quote #1: Kids are simple creatures, ruled by greed and fear and an eternal reluctance to go to the toilet.
Bonus quote #2: The best way to coerce people is through guilt and fear. It’s why religion’s done such smashing business for thousands of years.
Bonus quote #3: Life’s not a performance, it’s a dress rehearsal: people on an unfinished stage who don’t quite know what they’re doing, getting their lines wrong and never fully in character. Everyone’s an amateur, an understudy, we just get better at hiding it.
For more reviews, check out The Comedic Novel Review at www.pearlsbeforeswine68.com which is also home to the Great White Host Blog.
March 29, 2020
I owe this book a review. I read this in 2018, and a year and a half later, I'm still thinking of it as the best book I read that year.
It's a divisive book, as it won't appeal to those who don't appreciate its flavor of dark humor. And for a funny book, it is extremely dark. Lewis Caputo truly is an evil man. I was disgusted by so many of the things he did, but that doesn't mean I didn't enjoy reading this.
Throughout the whole book, I wanted Jonathan Doe to succeed, and I loved Percy the octopus. The writing itself made this a joy to read as well. Saunders crafted so many great lines.
It's a divisive book, as it won't appeal to those who don't appreciate its flavor of dark humor. And for a funny book, it is extremely dark. Lewis Caputo truly is an evil man. I was disgusted by so many of the things he did, but that doesn't mean I didn't enjoy reading this.
Throughout the whole book, I wanted Jonathan Doe to succeed, and I loved Percy the octopus. The writing itself made this a joy to read as well. Saunders crafted so many great lines.
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