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Ever After #1
Aftercare
This is a previously-published alternate cover edition of ASIN B0722P9BQY.
Aayan Denir knows Garrett Hillier was once a high-powered defense attorney, and—thanks to a leaked photograph—he knows Garrett is sexually submissive, which makes him ideally qualified to defend Aayan's brother from the charge of murdering his sub. Aayan would do anything to protect Syed, even if he doesn't understand how Syed could hurt someone he loves. He could never hurt Garrett. He only wants to take care of him—love him, serve him, cherish him. And maybe torture him. Just a little.
Garrett probably shouldn’t be dating his client’s brother. Right? And what’s the use in a confirmed sub dating a guy who doesn’t want to be a Dom anyway? The important thing is to get Syed cleared of the discriminatory murder charge he’s facing. Aayan is a distraction. But for the first time in the three lonely years since Garrett’s husband died, he’s feeling hope, ambition, and desire. Can he give up the pain he craves to find the love he needs?
As Syed’s trial date looms, Aayan and Garrett explore what a BDSM relationship means for them, and what they mean to each other.
Aftercare is a M/M BDSM contemporary romance about Aayan, a Muslim immigrant who’s not sure he can play the Dom role, and Garrett, a submissive attorney who walked away from his life when his husband died. 64,000 words.
Aayan Denir knows Garrett Hillier was once a high-powered defense attorney, and—thanks to a leaked photograph—he knows Garrett is sexually submissive, which makes him ideally qualified to defend Aayan's brother from the charge of murdering his sub. Aayan would do anything to protect Syed, even if he doesn't understand how Syed could hurt someone he loves. He could never hurt Garrett. He only wants to take care of him—love him, serve him, cherish him. And maybe torture him. Just a little.
Garrett probably shouldn’t be dating his client’s brother. Right? And what’s the use in a confirmed sub dating a guy who doesn’t want to be a Dom anyway? The important thing is to get Syed cleared of the discriminatory murder charge he’s facing. Aayan is a distraction. But for the first time in the three lonely years since Garrett’s husband died, he’s feeling hope, ambition, and desire. Can he give up the pain he craves to find the love he needs?
As Syed’s trial date looms, Aayan and Garrett explore what a BDSM relationship means for them, and what they mean to each other.
Aftercare is a M/M BDSM contemporary romance about Aayan, a Muslim immigrant who’s not sure he can play the Dom role, and Garrett, a submissive attorney who walked away from his life when his husband died. 64,000 words.
221 pages, ebook
First published May 17, 2017
153 people are currently reading
750 people want to read
About the author
Tanya Chris
60 books295 followersTanya writes in a variety of romantic and erotic genres, being an avid follower of many of these genres herself. Some of her favorites are M/M romance, MFM threesomes, and BDSM with male submissives.
Tanya lives in New England with her boyfriend and her cat and has participated in many of the activities about which she writes, but not all of them. It's left to the reader to decide which are which.
Tanya lives in New England with her boyfriend and her cat and has participated in many of the activities about which she writes, but not all of them. It's left to the reader to decide which are which.
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 199 reviews
June 24, 2017
Tanya Chris was a new to be author but she's on my radar now. Poor thing. Someone should warn her. So strap in, kids. Cupcake's about to gush, and by "gush" I mean talk your face off.
Aftercare was like a breath of fresh air that I inhaled with gusto. Reminiscent of a kinder, gentler Uneven in that Aayan like Gabriel has no real experience with kink, though he has a presence, innate dom qualities and an inner sadist begging to break free. However, Aayan's faith along with a college experience gone bad have done a number on his psyche and led him to squelch his urges.
I'm not a religious person thus I was surprised by how much I enjoyed the juxtaposition of Aayan's beliefs with his desires. Desires which run counter to Islam in particular his yearning to hurt his male lovers and whereas Islam values caretaking over violence. Islam also fundamentally prohibits homosexuality and Aayan is gay, something in many ways, I think he's perpetually trying to atone for. These opposing forces blend together to make Aayan a caretaker dom and a reticent sadist, so... crazy, stupid sexy.
He does this come here finger thing... I can't even!
I'm getting ahead of myself. Oops.
His brother Syed's partner and sub, Jaime, was murdered and Syed is the only suspect owing to their lifestyle. Aayan wants Garrett to represent his brother due to his much publicized submissiveness. Garrett's deceased husband Russell took a photo of him kneeling at his feet with an enraptured look on his face and subsequent to his death that photo was made public. Syed bought it. Aayan half fell in love with Garrett from that photo, so his hiring him isn't entirely altruistic.
The attraction between them is palpable but the question then becomes can Aayan meet Garrett's needs? Can he reconcile his sadistic urges with his faith?
The way Chris approached these questions and Aayan's characterization was nuanced and complex, sophisticated. It took Aayan a long time to admit he was gay for fear of disappointing his parents. He even married in an effort to subvert his sexuality, make his parents happy and remain a good Muslim, so the notion of going against god again inspires much angst.
But Garrett pushes all of his sadistic buttons. Makes him want and Garrett wants that pain too. Needs it.
Garrett has his fair share of baggage too. Said highly publicized photo of him pretty much destroyed his credibility as a high-powered attorney. He's been doing public defense work since Russell's death 3 yrs ago and existing. Garrett doesn't struggle so much with his feelings for Aayan as adjusting to the difference between him and Russell which captivated me with its simplicity. Can he adjust to only D/s without pain play? Not only that but simply the adjustment to the differences in their dominance and being the sub Aayan needs or wants as opposed to Russell.
They don't always communicate effectively and Garrett does throw out some mixed signals at times but I liked the way their relationship evolved; it felt realistic. They both struggle with their baggage but they both realize what they have has the potential to be something special and neither wants to lose it.
The sex has some grade A choice begging! Have I said how much I love it when they beg? Quality begging is difficult to come by. The sex isn't super kinky with some bondage, orgasm denial and a spanking scene. There is a size difference though and Aayan is prone to picking up Garrett and putting him where he wants him. *growls*
***NSFGR gif (blog only)***
I have a bigger fondness for the investigative side of law and this focused on the trial. Overall it held my attention, but I'd still have preferred finding out what happened to Jaime. There were some great secondary characters though including Dashiell and Dharini.
The only real niggle I had was why Aayan wouldn't just talk to Syed about his struggles, but by the same token, I can understand not only being the oldest and not wanting to burden his younger brother but Syed is on trial for his partner's murder so... prolly not the best time.
Both of these characters are likable and genuine and I'd be pleased as punch were there to be a follow up with any of them. What made Aftercare memorable for me was Aayan's unwavering devotion to Garrett. He pursues him with vigor and even before they really "get there", he knows Garrett is his one. He isn't afraid to both show and tell him in a way that didn't make it seem like he was craycraybenaynay, but rather a statement of fact. That combination of confidence and vulnerability... superlatives fail me.
If you like your kink with an extra helping of romance, give Aftercare a try.
A review copy was provided.
"When I'm with you it's like spring has come. Everything blooms and fills."
Aftercare was like a breath of fresh air that I inhaled with gusto. Reminiscent of a kinder, gentler Uneven in that Aayan like Gabriel has no real experience with kink, though he has a presence, innate dom qualities and an inner sadist begging to break free. However, Aayan's faith along with a college experience gone bad have done a number on his psyche and led him to squelch his urges.
I'm not a religious person thus I was surprised by how much I enjoyed the juxtaposition of Aayan's beliefs with his desires. Desires which run counter to Islam in particular his yearning to hurt his male lovers and whereas Islam values caretaking over violence. Islam also fundamentally prohibits homosexuality and Aayan is gay, something in many ways, I think he's perpetually trying to atone for. These opposing forces blend together to make Aayan a caretaker dom and a reticent sadist, so... crazy, stupid sexy.
He does this come here finger thing... I can't even!
I'm getting ahead of myself. Oops.
His brother Syed's partner and sub, Jaime, was murdered and Syed is the only suspect owing to their lifestyle. Aayan wants Garrett to represent his brother due to his much publicized submissiveness. Garrett's deceased husband Russell took a photo of him kneeling at his feet with an enraptured look on his face and subsequent to his death that photo was made public. Syed bought it. Aayan half fell in love with Garrett from that photo, so his hiring him isn't entirely altruistic.
The attraction between them is palpable but the question then becomes can Aayan meet Garrett's needs? Can he reconcile his sadistic urges with his faith?
The way Chris approached these questions and Aayan's characterization was nuanced and complex, sophisticated. It took Aayan a long time to admit he was gay for fear of disappointing his parents. He even married in an effort to subvert his sexuality, make his parents happy and remain a good Muslim, so the notion of going against god again inspires much angst.
But Garrett pushes all of his sadistic buttons. Makes him want and Garrett wants that pain too. Needs it.
He wanted to shred Garrett into manageable pieces, pieces he could own and control.
Garrett has his fair share of baggage too. Said highly publicized photo of him pretty much destroyed his credibility as a high-powered attorney. He's been doing public defense work since Russell's death 3 yrs ago and existing. Garrett doesn't struggle so much with his feelings for Aayan as adjusting to the difference between him and Russell which captivated me with its simplicity. Can he adjust to only D/s without pain play? Not only that but simply the adjustment to the differences in their dominance and being the sub Aayan needs or wants as opposed to Russell.
They don't always communicate effectively and Garrett does throw out some mixed signals at times but I liked the way their relationship evolved; it felt realistic. They both struggle with their baggage but they both realize what they have has the potential to be something special and neither wants to lose it.
He made Garrett feel like a thing he owned-a precious thing, a thing to be treated carefully, but his all the way through.
The sex has some grade A choice begging! Have I said how much I love it when they beg? Quality begging is difficult to come by. The sex isn't super kinky with some bondage, orgasm denial and a spanking scene. There is a size difference though and Aayan is prone to picking up Garrett and putting him where he wants him. *growls*
***NSFGR gif (blog only)***
I have a bigger fondness for the investigative side of law and this focused on the trial. Overall it held my attention, but I'd still have preferred finding out what happened to Jaime. There were some great secondary characters though including Dashiell and Dharini.
The only real niggle I had was why Aayan wouldn't just talk to Syed about his struggles, but by the same token, I can understand not only being the oldest and not wanting to burden his younger brother but Syed is on trial for his partner's murder so... prolly not the best time.
Both of these characters are likable and genuine and I'd be pleased as punch were there to be a follow up with any of them. What made Aftercare memorable for me was Aayan's unwavering devotion to Garrett. He pursues him with vigor and even before they really "get there", he knows Garrett is his one. He isn't afraid to both show and tell him in a way that didn't make it seem like he was craycraybenaynay, but rather a statement of fact. That combination of confidence and vulnerability... superlatives fail me.
If you like your kink with an extra helping of romance, give Aftercare a try.
"I'm going to love you and hurt you and love you."
A review copy was provided.
August 2, 2018
*Sidenote: this is still free at the time of the review.
This was so SO good and well thought-out and, especially in regards to the recent discussion of representation, an amazing story of an Islamic, gay man struggling with his sadomasochistic urges.
I LOVED Garrett and even though he pushed, he wasn't being a dick about it, but he was very clear in what he wanted and NEEDED and I thought they complimented each other very well.
I also want to mention that the women in this one were so so good! Dharini especially, was quite epic<3
This was almost a 5-star read for me, and I have pre-ordered book 2, hoping for more with this kind of tone and storyline.
I cannot wait to read how Syed will get through this and hopefully Dashiell will get his kink on as well, even though he pretended not to be interested... We see you AND your bulge D;-)
As for Aayan and Garrett I enjoyed this immensely, and even though a few things could have been elaborated on, I was quite happy with their development and Aayan's take-charge attitude, as well as the BDSM elements, I thought it was so well-done.
This was so SO good and well thought-out and, especially in regards to the recent discussion of representation, an amazing story of an Islamic, gay man struggling with his sadomasochistic urges.
I LOVED Garrett and even though he pushed, he wasn't being a dick about it, but he was very clear in what he wanted and NEEDED and I thought they complimented each other very well.
I also want to mention that the women in this one were so so good! Dharini especially, was quite epic<3
This was almost a 5-star read for me, and I have pre-ordered book 2, hoping for more with this kind of tone and storyline.
I cannot wait to read how Syed will get through this and hopefully Dashiell will get his kink on as well, even though he pretended not to be interested... We see you AND your bulge D;-)
As for Aayan and Garrett I enjoyed this immensely, and even though a few things could have been elaborated on, I was quite happy with their development and Aayan's take-charge attitude, as well as the BDSM elements, I thought it was so well-done.
January 20, 2020
3.5 stars. I enjoyed every page of this book. There are ways it could have been stronger, but I do recommend it to BDSM readers. There were funny, sad, and hot moments, and I will definitely continue with the series.
The setup was interesting. I won’t rehash the blurb, but I loved the element of the trial, as well as the internal struggle that Aayan was facing with his kink. Both were really thought-provoking angles. It’s common in BDSM stories to delve into the challenges that a submissive is facing, but less so on the dominant side, and both Aayan and his brother Syed were up against difficulties that made the story arc hold my interest. (No, this isn’t an incest story, lol. Syed isn’t one of the MCs here.)
But.
You knew there was a but, right?
I wanted more. The story aspects were fascinating and had a ton of potential, but I felt like the author just teased the itch I had to really dive deeply. The conflicts were handled simplistically. The tension was only so-so because I never really felt any risk of not reaching the ideal conclusion. And without going into spoilers, I’ll just say… too often, exterior factors provided easy resolution or explanation when the characters’ inner selves should have been explored instead. Therefore, the characterizations stayed pretty surface level, which I found frustrating.
Also, there was too much focus on the kink. I didn't go back to confirm this precisely, but it felt like there was never a conversation or even inner narrative that wasn't about that. Unfortunately, that only serves to flatten the characters, who should be portrayed as more than their kinks.
Still, I do recommend and will continue. The next volume stars characters we met in this one, and I’m interested in how their story plays out… and I wouldn’t mind getting a little more of Aayan and Garrett, either…
The setup was interesting. I won’t rehash the blurb, but I loved the element of the trial, as well as the internal struggle that Aayan was facing with his kink. Both were really thought-provoking angles. It’s common in BDSM stories to delve into the challenges that a submissive is facing, but less so on the dominant side, and both Aayan and his brother Syed were up against difficulties that made the story arc hold my interest. (No, this isn’t an incest story, lol. Syed isn’t one of the MCs here.)
But.
You knew there was a but, right?
I wanted more. The story aspects were fascinating and had a ton of potential, but I felt like the author just teased the itch I had to really dive deeply. The conflicts were handled simplistically. The tension was only so-so because I never really felt any risk of not reaching the ideal conclusion. And without going into spoilers, I’ll just say… too often, exterior factors provided easy resolution or explanation when the characters’ inner selves should have been explored instead. Therefore, the characterizations stayed pretty surface level, which I found frustrating.
Also, there was too much focus on the kink. I didn't go back to confirm this precisely, but it felt like there was never a conversation or even inner narrative that wasn't about that. Unfortunately, that only serves to flatten the characters, who should be portrayed as more than their kinks.
Still, I do recommend and will continue. The next volume stars characters we met in this one, and I’m interested in how their story plays out… and I wouldn’t mind getting a little more of Aayan and Garrett, either…
May 24, 2017
Aftercare is my first book by author Tanya Chris and hopefully I will be reading more, soon! I really enjoyed the emotional depth this author went to in this story, as we watch our two MC learn about each other and figure out if they can be what the other needs.
They say a picture can speak 1000 words...nothing is more true than two very important pictures in this story. Both pictures feature a man in love, in the throes of submission, while deep in love with their Dom...one picture brings a new love to Garrett and the second photo may just save a life.
Garrett, has been alone the last three years after losing his husband and Dominant to cancer. Garret is a masochist, a submissive, and a cut throat power house attorney. However, for the last three years he has been broken and not really living...just existing. That changes one day when a tall, dark, handsome, and Dominant man enters his office one evening...after closing time...and refuses to take "no, we're closed for an answer"...This man is Aayan and he is looking for Garrett to save his brother Syed's life.
Aayan and Garrett - These two have immediate chemistry, and even though Aayan has never explored his Dominance it pours from him as naturally as breathing.
Aayan is not totally innocent though - he does have a past, a past that is telling him that his desires to hurt another, his sadistic streak, are evil and should be repressed. Aayan is a very religious man..he believes that Allah would not understand him hurting another. He believes in commitment, of loving, honoring, and caring for your partner. How can you care for someone, yet beat them with a crop? He has trouble throughout much of this story reconciling his religion with his desires, kinks, and sexuality.
In addition, Aayan has to reconcile that his younger brother has been living the life (gay/Sadist/Dominant) and his partner/submissive was murdered, bringing to light Syed's sexuality and kinks and making Aayan yearn for his deepest desires to become a reality. It is this murder charge that brings Aayan to Garrett's office when the man in his brother's picture comes to life. Now Aayan has to push himself to be the man Garrett needs while not losing himself. Garrett has to figure out if he can live with what Aayan can offer or if he needs more...all while Garrett works to clear Syed's name.
Will any of these men get their happy ending? The story is worth reading to find out! This is my first book by this author and I will be looking for more...
4.5 stars!
They say a picture can speak 1000 words...nothing is more true than two very important pictures in this story. Both pictures feature a man in love, in the throes of submission, while deep in love with their Dom...one picture brings a new love to Garrett and the second photo may just save a life.
Garrett, has been alone the last three years after losing his husband and Dominant to cancer. Garret is a masochist, a submissive, and a cut throat power house attorney. However, for the last three years he has been broken and not really living...just existing. That changes one day when a tall, dark, handsome, and Dominant man enters his office one evening...after closing time...and refuses to take "no, we're closed for an answer"...This man is Aayan and he is looking for Garrett to save his brother Syed's life.
Aayan and Garrett - These two have immediate chemistry, and even though Aayan has never explored his Dominance it pours from him as naturally as breathing.
Aayan is not totally innocent though - he does have a past, a past that is telling him that his desires to hurt another, his sadistic streak, are evil and should be repressed. Aayan is a very religious man..he believes that Allah would not understand him hurting another. He believes in commitment, of loving, honoring, and caring for your partner. How can you care for someone, yet beat them with a crop? He has trouble throughout much of this story reconciling his religion with his desires, kinks, and sexuality.
In addition, Aayan has to reconcile that his younger brother has been living the life (gay/Sadist/Dominant) and his partner/submissive was murdered, bringing to light Syed's sexuality and kinks and making Aayan yearn for his deepest desires to become a reality. It is this murder charge that brings Aayan to Garrett's office when the man in his brother's picture comes to life. Now Aayan has to push himself to be the man Garrett needs while not losing himself. Garrett has to figure out if he can live with what Aayan can offer or if he needs more...all while Garrett works to clear Syed's name.
Will any of these men get their happy ending? The story is worth reading to find out! This is my first book by this author and I will be looking for more...
4.5 stars!
March 30, 2019
5 STARS!
After 3 years of mourning the loss of his husband, Garrett is unprepared for his reaction to Aayan, who appears in his office late one night, looking for a lawyer. Aayan's brother, who happens to be a Dom, has been charged with the murder of his partner.
Honestly, there was nothing I didn't like about this one. The writing, the pacing, the story, the characters . . . they all came together to create a bit of pure magic.
The story dealt with some very weighty issues.
Though Aayan has mostly come to terms with his faith and his sexual orientation...
I can't recommend it enough!
I'll leave you with my favorite quote:
"It's hard to reconcile who I am with who I ought to be."GAH! How I love a book with heart and soul!
After 3 years of mourning the loss of his husband, Garrett is unprepared for his reaction to Aayan, who appears in his office late one night, looking for a lawyer. Aayan's brother, who happens to be a Dom, has been charged with the murder of his partner.
Honestly, there was nothing I didn't like about this one. The writing, the pacing, the story, the characters . . . they all came together to create a bit of pure magic.
The story dealt with some very weighty issues.
Though Aayan has mostly come to terms with his faith and his sexual orientation...
"I guess if God takes responsibility for making me, he has to own the result."...he still struggles with his need to dominate and inflict pain. And meeting Garrett - a submissive masochist - brings the fight right to the surface.
But Garrett's fear, the opposite of timidity, a "yes, please, bring it on" combination of dread and anticipation? It called to a predatory instinct in him that longed to respond, to force on Garrett all the pleasure, all the pain, he hungered for.One of my favorite things about this story was the incredible tone with which Aayan's dominant nature was portrayed:
Aayan's eyes flashed with that feral menace as he eyed Garrett quite deliberately. "I could put you on your knees."While at the same time, his insecurities rang true:
He wanted to just be himself, but he was afraid of who he was and even more afraid that who he was wasn't enough.It made for a very interesting character that I couldn't get enough of . . . and surprisingly, I loved Garrett almost as much; he was just as complex though more settled in his own skin.
Garrett's submission had very little of play in it at all. It wasn't a mask he put on; it was a mask he took off.To go along with these amazing characters were bursts of an almost lyrical writing style:
His biceps bulged from gripping whatever part of Aayan he could reach, as though Aayan were both the storm and the anchor.Although my review focuses on our heroes' relationship, I'm barely scratching the surface of all the issues that this wonderful book touches on. And the best part? They were all well thought-out and beautifully articulated.
I can't recommend it enough!
I'll leave you with my favorite quote:
Aayan found himself on his feet, unable to bear the picture of Garrett alone and empty without trying to redraw it.
August 8, 2018
***** A marvelously brilliant story ! *****
This is excellent in it's explanation of BDSM, sadism, masochism, and the person's inner thoughts and reasons.
*** Sharp. Intelligent. Powerful.***
* Garrett, 40, is a Lawyer whose husband died
three years before. He's still wallowing in sadness; they'd been together 15 years. He's closing up his office,
when a tall, handsome Mid-Eastern man walked in.
The man, Aayan, didn't care that he was closing,
he wanted a new lawyer for his brother, Syed. Syed's lover was killed in a gay bashing hate crime, and when they found out Syed was Jaime's Dom, they charged him with murder.
Garrett will understand the D/s lifestyle and defend his brother. Meanwhile, Garrett recognizes the Dominant in Aayan; is drawn to him, but Aayan, 40ish Wall Street Financial man, is struggling to understand his own desire to inflict pain on a submissive.
We get deep thoughts, inner musings, and their erotic, spicy hot, sexiness with BDSM scenes.
You will see Aayan's gradual changes as he learns and researches more about D/s. The connection between Garrett and Aayan is not just sexual. They have long talks, dates, dinners, sexy BDSM, and the plot is engaging.
It is hard to put down, because we are involved and need to know what happens with the trial and their relationship. I was riveted to this wonderfully written tale, with it's exciting insight.
Breathtakingly amazing ! Highly recommended.
ENJOY !
=======
Thank you sweet Jenny for the rec !
===============
This is excellent in it's explanation of BDSM, sadism, masochism, and the person's inner thoughts and reasons.
*** Sharp. Intelligent. Powerful.***
* Garrett, 40, is a Lawyer whose husband died
three years before. He's still wallowing in sadness; they'd been together 15 years. He's closing up his office,
when a tall, handsome Mid-Eastern man walked in.
The man, Aayan, didn't care that he was closing,
he wanted a new lawyer for his brother, Syed. Syed's lover was killed in a gay bashing hate crime, and when they found out Syed was Jaime's Dom, they charged him with murder.
Garrett will understand the D/s lifestyle and defend his brother. Meanwhile, Garrett recognizes the Dominant in Aayan; is drawn to him, but Aayan, 40ish Wall Street Financial man, is struggling to understand his own desire to inflict pain on a submissive.
We get deep thoughts, inner musings, and their erotic, spicy hot, sexiness with BDSM scenes.
You will see Aayan's gradual changes as he learns and researches more about D/s. The connection between Garrett and Aayan is not just sexual. They have long talks, dates, dinners, sexy BDSM, and the plot is engaging.
It is hard to put down, because we are involved and need to know what happens with the trial and their relationship. I was riveted to this wonderfully written tale, with it's exciting insight.
Breathtakingly amazing ! Highly recommended.
ENJOY !
=======
Thank you sweet Jenny for the rec !
===============
September 10, 2018
** 4.25 stars **
This is my first time reading Ms Chris' work and I can say that I enjoyed it very much. The characters were fresh and well developed, there was no unnecessary drama just for the sake of drama, the plot was interesting but didn't overshadow the developing relationship between the MCs. I do not care much for dead partner trope but here it was a little muted and there were no moments of self-hatred from Garrett when he decided to start something with Aayan. Another good thing was the fact that even though there was a religious undertone it was not overwhelming and well written in the book. What ticked me off was how sometimes Aayan was sanctimonious, even preaching and how condescending and judgemental he was to his brother and even sometimes Garrett for craving certain things from their respective partners.
Garrett is a character I sincerely like. He is smart, confident but not arrogant, he is loyal but knows when he is ready to let go of his past but does it with quiet dignity. I liked how thoughtful he was, how patient and professional he was. Aayan who frankly speaking was confused most of his life about how he should feel about his own desires based on thoughtless words of a youth is loyal, smart, demanding yet very unsure in himself. That was another thing that I didn't like in this book - how unconfident and sometimes even whiny he was. It was a very unattractive trait in him that spoiled the first part of the book for me. But later he finally got himself together and became the man that he was always supposed to be - confident and self assured Dominant.
I loved the proceedings in court, how Garrett handled Syed's case, I thought it was sexy. I wish there was more of it but since it was not the real focus of the story too much of it would have made it cluttered. The chemistry and their intimate encounters were intense even when they were romantic and without any hint of D/s. I loved them together and how they slowly opened up and were always honest with their needs especially Garrett. He told Aayan what he needed, and I am glad that Aayan finally stopped being silly and judgemental and made them both happy.
This is a story of discovery, healing and acceptance. It's filled with diverse and strong-willed characters who together make up a wonderful and enjoyable book. I highly recommend it!
This is my first time reading Ms Chris' work and I can say that I enjoyed it very much. The characters were fresh and well developed, there was no unnecessary drama just for the sake of drama, the plot was interesting but didn't overshadow the developing relationship between the MCs. I do not care much for dead partner trope but here it was a little muted and there were no moments of self-hatred from Garrett when he decided to start something with Aayan. Another good thing was the fact that even though there was a religious undertone it was not overwhelming and well written in the book. What ticked me off was how sometimes Aayan was sanctimonious, even preaching and how condescending and judgemental he was to his brother and even sometimes Garrett for craving certain things from their respective partners.
Garrett is a character I sincerely like. He is smart, confident but not arrogant, he is loyal but knows when he is ready to let go of his past but does it with quiet dignity. I liked how thoughtful he was, how patient and professional he was. Aayan who frankly speaking was confused most of his life about how he should feel about his own desires based on thoughtless words of a youth is loyal, smart, demanding yet very unsure in himself. That was another thing that I didn't like in this book - how unconfident and sometimes even whiny he was. It was a very unattractive trait in him that spoiled the first part of the book for me. But later he finally got himself together and became the man that he was always supposed to be - confident and self assured Dominant.
I loved the proceedings in court, how Garrett handled Syed's case, I thought it was sexy. I wish there was more of it but since it was not the real focus of the story too much of it would have made it cluttered. The chemistry and their intimate encounters were intense even when they were romantic and without any hint of D/s. I loved them together and how they slowly opened up and were always honest with their needs especially Garrett. He told Aayan what he needed, and I am glad that Aayan finally stopped being silly and judgemental and made them both happy.
This is a story of discovery, healing and acceptance. It's filled with diverse and strong-willed characters who together make up a wonderful and enjoyable book. I highly recommend it!
July 31, 2018
Overall book rating: 3.8
Audio Book: N/A
Book Cover: 2 for the first cover and the NEW one is a definite upgrade. I'll give it 3.8 BUT - Still don't like the portrait though, Sorry
First Tanya Chris and may I say that she made me sit up straight and take notice.
Why?
Because I see great potential – that’s why.
I like BDSM but I’m picky. Don’t give me a Dom who doesn’t earn the title, yeah?
Aayan’s character has presense. Something I like. He has the potential to make a sub shiver should he fully apply himself to the lifestyle I think and THAT is what made me finish the book.
I don’t like religious books. I’m really not big on hours of laws and chastising I read for my pleasure not my torture, so I chose to look over all the little niggling things in here. Luckily it didn’t get overwhelming in that department.
I also very much liked Garrett. I don’t like “pathetic” characters, and so he was a fresh little breeze.
I liked it. And I am so looking forward to see what this author is going to do in future.
Audio Book: N/A
Book Cover: 2 for the first cover and the NEW one is a definite upgrade. I'll give it 3.8 BUT - Still don't like the portrait though, Sorry
First Tanya Chris and may I say that she made me sit up straight and take notice.
Why?
Because I see great potential – that’s why.
I like BDSM but I’m picky. Don’t give me a Dom who doesn’t earn the title, yeah?
Aayan’s character has presense. Something I like. He has the potential to make a sub shiver should he fully apply himself to the lifestyle I think and THAT is what made me finish the book.
I don’t like religious books. I’m really not big on hours of laws and chastising I read for my pleasure not my torture, so I chose to look over all the little niggling things in here. Luckily it didn’t get overwhelming in that department.
I also very much liked Garrett. I don’t like “pathetic” characters, and so he was a fresh little breeze.
I liked it. And I am so looking forward to see what this author is going to do in future.
June 12, 2017
This was an unique storyline. I wasn't sure about the set up of the story when the book first started but as the story unfolded it started to make sense. The blurb does a good job of explaining the plot and I was immediately drawn in.
The story covers the mystery behind who killed Syed's partner as well as the romance between Aayan and Garrett. The men were very different on the surface but as they got to know each they found they were a good match for each other. Aayan has never explored his dominant side and he feels it goes against his religious beliefs. Some of the story is about him coming to a place where he can accept his desire to be dominant and sometimes sadistic as well as maintain his Muslim faith. I don't really know anything about the Muslim religion so I can't say whether this was an accurate portrayal or not but it seemed to be presented in a realistic way in regards to Aayan's concerns.
While I thought the concept was interesting and I liked the characters well enough there was nothing that especially stood out to me either negatively or positively. I had no particular complaints about the book but it also probably won't stand out to me down the road which is why I did not rate it higher.
If you're a fan of BDSM books and are looking for something a bit different I would recommend this. It not only has unique BDSM elements but it has a main character who is of color and Muslim. I appreciated that.
The story covers the mystery behind who killed Syed's partner as well as the romance between Aayan and Garrett. The men were very different on the surface but as they got to know each they found they were a good match for each other. Aayan has never explored his dominant side and he feels it goes against his religious beliefs. Some of the story is about him coming to a place where he can accept his desire to be dominant and sometimes sadistic as well as maintain his Muslim faith. I don't really know anything about the Muslim religion so I can't say whether this was an accurate portrayal or not but it seemed to be presented in a realistic way in regards to Aayan's concerns.
While I thought the concept was interesting and I liked the characters well enough there was nothing that especially stood out to me either negatively or positively. I had no particular complaints about the book but it also probably won't stand out to me down the road which is why I did not rate it higher.
If you're a fan of BDSM books and are looking for something a bit different I would recommend this. It not only has unique BDSM elements but it has a main character who is of color and Muslim. I appreciated that.
November 2, 2023
Garrett, a defense attorney, is a man who had lost everything with the death of his husband, who was the love of his life...his everything, his privacy, his law practice…and his Dom. He'd been drifting for 3 years when his future comes knocking at his door. Aayan is conflicted about everything he feels. His reason for tracking down Garrett is not that he can’t get the man out of his mind. It's that he desperately wants/needs to save his brother, Syed, from a charge of murder...a murder that he didn’t commit. Aayan's feelings for the man that is defending his brother are just making everything more complicated. I liked this story much more than I thought I would. I have no patience for people that judge others for their way of life, what church they do or don't go to, what their political views are, the color of their skin or who they choose to love. The man on trial for his life in this story was being tried for all of these things under the guise of murder because his lover died while they were consensually practicing something they both wanted. The side characters in the story are a mixed bag, but in a mostly good way. I really liked Aayan’s ex and Garrett’s secretary. Both were strong female characters who totally support the couple in their journey toward each other. It was interesting to see how Garrett’s mind worked as he defended Syed. The author does a great job of allowing us in on some of Garrett’s thought processes as he uses the personal knowledge, he has of the BDSM community and the law to make sure that Syed doesn’t end up in jail. Aayan is a wonderful character and I loved watching his struggle to reconcile his feelings for Garrett and the faith that he’s trying to make peace with. Mostly I enjoyed this story. The characters are complex and compelling, and the storyline kept me interested without pushing things along too quickly. It would be a good introduction story for someone who’s curious about the BDSM lifestyle. It gives a decent example without pushing anything too far and coming off as scary. This will not be my last read from this author.
November 16, 2019
There was more talking about BDSM than doing, but I think I prefer that. lol At least when it comes to S&M. I love the power exchange, but the actual hitting and whatnot is not my favorite.
Aayan is an amazing man. I like 'em confident but not cocky. And he's like that.
Islam played a big role here. Aayan is a natural sadist and he likes inflicting pain, but it's against his faith. So he struggles to accept himself.
Garrett is a masochist. He was a hotshot lawyer, until his husband died. After that he withdrew into himself, and it didn't help that his sexual preferences were exposed in the tabloids.
Aayan comes to him with a case, a very personal one. His brother was accused of murdering his boyfriend in an alley. They suspect him because they were in the S&M lifestyle and the proof is on Jamie's body.
Garrett reluctantly accepts to defend Syed in court. So this book, in part, is really heavy on the legal subject, but I found everything accurate, the author was really thorough. (Except I really didn't get why the question "where were you at the time of the murder" was brought up so late in the case. That's usually the first they ask.)
The ending was wrapped up too fast and too easily. But overall it was a win.
Aayan is an amazing man. I like 'em confident but not cocky. And he's like that.
Islam played a big role here. Aayan is a natural sadist and he likes inflicting pain, but it's against his faith. So he struggles to accept himself.
Garrett is a masochist. He was a hotshot lawyer, until his husband died. After that he withdrew into himself, and it didn't help that his sexual preferences were exposed in the tabloids.
Aayan comes to him with a case, a very personal one. His brother was accused of murdering his boyfriend in an alley. They suspect him because they were in the S&M lifestyle and the proof is on Jamie's body.
Garrett reluctantly accepts to defend Syed in court. So this book, in part, is really heavy on the legal subject, but I found everything accurate, the author was really thorough. (Except I really didn't get why the question "where were you at the time of the murder" was brought up so late in the case. That's usually the first they ask.)
The ending was wrapped up too fast and too easily. But overall it was a win.
March 1, 2021
*changed my rating because it’s two months later and I’m remembering things that annoyed me. Definite case that this book caught me at the right time, because I don’t think I’d vibe with it now*
I devoured every word of this book. Savoured every single paragraph and didn’t skip lines. A book hasn’t enraptured me this strongly for a long time.
This is a fully rounded story that took my breath away. The subject matter called to me, as I love reading and learning about BDSM lifestyles. In here, BDSM was talked about more than it was shown, but it didn’t bother me. It felt necessary, even.
Garrett is a lawyer who lost his husband to cancer three years prior. He’s been a shell of a man ever since, losing his best friend, lover and dominant all in one fell swoop.
Aayan is a protector and demands respect in every room he enters. I enjoyed him immensely. He’s tightly wound in his Islam ways, and I really appreciated the authors respect of the religion. It was a huge part of this book, and it added a certain something that really worked for me.
Aayan knows of Garrett, the “submissive lawyer.” Garrett’s late husband was a renowned artist, and as a Christmas present painted him kneeling at his feet. This photograph was one of the main focal points of this story.
When Aayan seeks out Garrett to represent his brother for allegedly murdering his submissive lover, sparks fly. Yes, this is a deep subject matter that may make some people uncomfortable. But the way it was written didn’t make me feel uncomfortable. It made me feel seen.
When you read a really good book, you almost “adopt” the characters feelings as your own. And Garrett, the fierce lawyer persona he wore and the submissive he was spoke to me.
Syed, Aayan’s brother, did not kill his submissive lover. This was a case of racism and prejudice against the Muslim and BDSM community.
Now getting into the finer points of the story:
Aayan and Garrett’s romance. This isn’t a typical romance, not by a long shot. And it isn’t one that I usually enjoy, because in some ways, it feels unfinished. But, the thing is, I don’t even care.
The sex between them was scorching, and watching Aayan come to terms with his sadism was a true pleasure in more ways than one.
The trial itself: I don’t feel like it took away from the story, and I’m the type of person who doesn’t typically enjoy courtroom dramas. Like I said, the subject matter appealed to me.
The characters. Oh my gosh, I loved them all. There wasn’t one person who annoyed the crap out of me, which is rare nowadays. One character comes to mind, Aayan’s ex-wife. A strong and feisty woman, a true pillar and ally of the LGBTQ and BDSM communities, and the reason Aayan had the courage to live his life as an out, Muslim gay man. She was a delight, and I liked that she was an integral part of the story.
Dashiell, Garrett’s friend. They met through a gay attorney dating app when Garrett was being silly and pushing Aayan away. They formed a special friendship, and I enjoyed getting to know him. I’m guessing he gets a story, and I can’t wait to read it.
Madeline, Garrett’s receptionist/paralegal. She was hilarious and just an utter delight. Every character here had their own personality that all meshed super well together.
There were a few loose ends, however. I still have no idea what Aayan does for a living, and I would’ve liked to see more of his parents religious beliefs influencing his own. We get a bit of that, and maybe it was just enough and it would’ve been too dramatic on top of the trial and learning how to come to terms with his sadism.
Aayan claims he loved Garrett before they even met. His brother, Syed, randomly bought a painting of a submissive man kneeling that just so happened to be Garrett. Looking at that panting in his brothers office was a catalyst sparking his desire to inflict loving pain. With that came guilt, which was thoroughly sifted through within the story.
I would have liked to see them date more, but I’m still very satisfied with how their relationship progressed. And I can even excuse the getting married too soon troupe. In Aayan’s culture, it’s very important to him that he marries the person he loves and forms a strong marriage. I respect that.
This was a great read that kept me enamoured from page one. I was surprised how far in this story took me. This is my first time reading this author, and you bet your ass I’m gonna devour the next book like a starving person.
Onto my favourites list it goes!
I devoured every word of this book. Savoured every single paragraph and didn’t skip lines. A book hasn’t enraptured me this strongly for a long time.
This is a fully rounded story that took my breath away. The subject matter called to me, as I love reading and learning about BDSM lifestyles. In here, BDSM was talked about more than it was shown, but it didn’t bother me. It felt necessary, even.
Garrett is a lawyer who lost his husband to cancer three years prior. He’s been a shell of a man ever since, losing his best friend, lover and dominant all in one fell swoop.
Aayan is a protector and demands respect in every room he enters. I enjoyed him immensely. He’s tightly wound in his Islam ways, and I really appreciated the authors respect of the religion. It was a huge part of this book, and it added a certain something that really worked for me.
Aayan knows of Garrett, the “submissive lawyer.” Garrett’s late husband was a renowned artist, and as a Christmas present painted him kneeling at his feet. This photograph was one of the main focal points of this story.
When Aayan seeks out Garrett to represent his brother for allegedly murdering his submissive lover, sparks fly. Yes, this is a deep subject matter that may make some people uncomfortable. But the way it was written didn’t make me feel uncomfortable. It made me feel seen.
When you read a really good book, you almost “adopt” the characters feelings as your own. And Garrett, the fierce lawyer persona he wore and the submissive he was spoke to me.
Syed, Aayan’s brother, did not kill his submissive lover. This was a case of racism and prejudice against the Muslim and BDSM community.
Now getting into the finer points of the story:
Aayan and Garrett’s romance. This isn’t a typical romance, not by a long shot. And it isn’t one that I usually enjoy, because in some ways, it feels unfinished. But, the thing is, I don’t even care.
The sex between them was scorching, and watching Aayan come to terms with his sadism was a true pleasure in more ways than one.
The trial itself: I don’t feel like it took away from the story, and I’m the type of person who doesn’t typically enjoy courtroom dramas. Like I said, the subject matter appealed to me.
The characters. Oh my gosh, I loved them all. There wasn’t one person who annoyed the crap out of me, which is rare nowadays. One character comes to mind, Aayan’s ex-wife. A strong and feisty woman, a true pillar and ally of the LGBTQ and BDSM communities, and the reason Aayan had the courage to live his life as an out, Muslim gay man. She was a delight, and I liked that she was an integral part of the story.
Dashiell, Garrett’s friend. They met through a gay attorney dating app when Garrett was being silly and pushing Aayan away. They formed a special friendship, and I enjoyed getting to know him. I’m guessing he gets a story, and I can’t wait to read it.
Madeline, Garrett’s receptionist/paralegal. She was hilarious and just an utter delight. Every character here had their own personality that all meshed super well together.
There were a few loose ends, however. I still have no idea what Aayan does for a living, and I would’ve liked to see more of his parents religious beliefs influencing his own. We get a bit of that, and maybe it was just enough and it would’ve been too dramatic on top of the trial and learning how to come to terms with his sadism.
Aayan claims he loved Garrett before they even met. His brother, Syed, randomly bought a painting of a submissive man kneeling that just so happened to be Garrett. Looking at that panting in his brothers office was a catalyst sparking his desire to inflict loving pain. With that came guilt, which was thoroughly sifted through within the story.
I would have liked to see them date more, but I’m still very satisfied with how their relationship progressed. And I can even excuse the getting married too soon troupe. In Aayan’s culture, it’s very important to him that he marries the person he loves and forms a strong marriage. I respect that.
This was a great read that kept me enamoured from page one. I was surprised how far in this story took me. This is my first time reading this author, and you bet your ass I’m gonna devour the next book like a starving person.
Onto my favourites list it goes!
August 22, 2023
Upgrading to five stars on re-read. Still absolutely love this book. It holds up well. CANNOT WAIT to start Syed and Dashiell's book. It will be delicious!
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This was pretty doggone great. Extremely well written, hot sex, realistic exploration of BDSM and Aayan's reluctance to reconcile his Muslim faith with his sadistic, dominant side. Murder trial was great. Interesting without weighing down the story, and really showcased Garrett as both a great lawyer and a sub. The women in the story really rounded it out, and were great supporting characters. I loved Dharini, Aayan's ex wife.
Definitely a story I would read again. Will Syed and Dashiell get a book?? Dashiell needs love!
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This was pretty doggone great. Extremely well written, hot sex, realistic exploration of BDSM and Aayan's reluctance to reconcile his Muslim faith with his sadistic, dominant side. Murder trial was great. Interesting without weighing down the story, and really showcased Garrett as both a great lawyer and a sub. The women in the story really rounded it out, and were great supporting characters. I loved Dharini, Aayan's ex wife.
Definitely a story I would read again. Will Syed and Dashiell get a book?? Dashiell needs love!
August 5, 2018
Fascinating point of view
I really like finding a new to me author whose work promises future enjoyment for me. This was a different examination of BDSM and the misconceptions and public perception of the practice. Garrett lost his artist husband and dominant to illness, which resulted in public outing of their S/M dynamic in the bedroom through a dispute over a personal photo. Garrett’s reputation as an attorney brings Aayan asking for help, putting BDSM, Islam and prejudice on a collision course with justice, as well as between Garrett and Aayan.
I really liked how the characters came across and their discussions of kink, S&M, the exchange of power and meaning of submission. That’s the crux of the story, as Aayan resists the concept, unable to see past his convictions that it’s abuse and neither can the police or prosecution. The legal process and work the attorneys put in is depicted quite realistically in my view. Something was missing though, in the relationship building between Aayan and Garrett. I felt it moved too quickly between stages later in the narrative although the author did add a reasonable amount of emotional conflict for both men at the start. Sex scenes are scorching hot but I never captured a good sense of where falling in love happened. It was still very enjoyable and engaging, making me anticipate how the case would be resolved. I will certainly be reading Dashiell and Syed’s story.
I really like finding a new to me author whose work promises future enjoyment for me. This was a different examination of BDSM and the misconceptions and public perception of the practice. Garrett lost his artist husband and dominant to illness, which resulted in public outing of their S/M dynamic in the bedroom through a dispute over a personal photo. Garrett’s reputation as an attorney brings Aayan asking for help, putting BDSM, Islam and prejudice on a collision course with justice, as well as between Garrett and Aayan.
I really liked how the characters came across and their discussions of kink, S&M, the exchange of power and meaning of submission. That’s the crux of the story, as Aayan resists the concept, unable to see past his convictions that it’s abuse and neither can the police or prosecution. The legal process and work the attorneys put in is depicted quite realistically in my view. Something was missing though, in the relationship building between Aayan and Garrett. I felt it moved too quickly between stages later in the narrative although the author did add a reasonable amount of emotional conflict for both men at the start. Sex scenes are scorching hot but I never captured a good sense of where falling in love happened. It was still very enjoyable and engaging, making me anticipate how the case would be resolved. I will certainly be reading Dashiell and Syed’s story.
July 18, 2019
Picture worth a thousand words
3.25 stars
D/s novel involving a interracial couple. Garrett is a submissive defense attorney who is representing a Dom accused of murdering his submissive. Aayan has a dominant presence that both specks to Garrett and scares the shit out of him.
Aayan and Garrett are drawn to each other but things don't go as smoothly as they want. Each has baggage that they need to dump to find their HEA.
3.25 stars
D/s novel involving a interracial couple. Garrett is a submissive defense attorney who is representing a Dom accused of murdering his submissive. Aayan has a dominant presence that both specks to Garrett and scares the shit out of him.
Aayan and Garrett are drawn to each other but things don't go as smoothly as they want. Each has baggage that they need to dump to find their HEA.
September 11, 2020
E' estremamente difficile trovare BDSM equilibrati e che vadano altre la frusta, spiegando il perché di certi bisogni. Questo è un piccolo capolavoro, che parla non solo di BDSM ma anche di integrazione, religione e lutto.
June 6, 2017
DNF @ 33%. Aayan was unlikeable. He was a creepy stalker. He oscillated between being a bully and being a wimp. Aayan had a strange relationship with his weird ex-wife. Garrett, as a defense attorney, was unprofessional, passive, and just crappy. He never hired a PI to investigate for defense counsel.
August 4, 2018
What I liked about this book is that it's rather rare to see a dom who is just pretty much human and not perfectly okay with himself. I liked that the problems these two guys had were mostly about his hang-ups and insecurities, about his boundaries and not Garrett's.
June 23, 2018
3.5~4/5
I enjoyed the case.
I enjoyed the case.
August 7, 2018
This falls somewhere between 3 and 4 stars.
I don't know, there were a few issues with it, I'm not going to go over the things that didn't work, but overall, I was into the story and wanted to see how it was going to play out.
Aayan struggles to reconcile his desires with the man he wants to be or thinks he should be, or who is he told he should be. Honestly, I would have loved more scenes between him and his brother. One reviewer said his relationship with his ex was weird, but I didn't feel that way at all. I thought it was great, and spoke to a maturity with both of them and showed they genuinely cared about each other even though they didn't work out.
Garrett, I really liked him. I like that he had to figure out what he could live with as well and that he and Aayan talked about things. I am going to read the next book as well, I found the side characters interesting.
I don't know, there were a few issues with it, I'm not going to go over the things that didn't work, but overall, I was into the story and wanted to see how it was going to play out.
Aayan struggles to reconcile his desires with the man he wants to be or thinks he should be, or who is he told he should be. Honestly, I would have loved more scenes between him and his brother. One reviewer said his relationship with his ex was weird, but I didn't feel that way at all. I thought it was great, and spoke to a maturity with both of them and showed they genuinely cared about each other even though they didn't work out.
Garrett, I really liked him. I like that he had to figure out what he could live with as well and that he and Aayan talked about things. I am going to read the next book as well, I found the side characters interesting.
Read
February 7, 2018DNF @50%
It started out great but lost my interest halfway. Nothing wrong with the book and the writing is good but it's been in my kindle for months and months and I still have no urge to pick it back up.
It started out great but lost my interest halfway. Nothing wrong with the book and the writing is good but it's been in my kindle for months and months and I still have no urge to pick it back up.
August 4, 2019
3.75 Stars
June 14, 2017
4/5 for Aftercare - this was a solid quick read with some BDSM undertones, mostly D/S. Honestly this wasn't a long book, only 184 pages, so I wasn't expecting the depth of connection I got between these two characters. I mean, it was still surface level, but it was more than I expected from such a short novel.
The MC's in this story had a lot of depth. Garrett gave up on his identity as a submissive after his husband and dominant passed away. He missed the feeling of being on his knees and being in the presence of a true dominant, but he was afraid to move on. Thankfully, during his marriage, a photograph was leaked placing him in a very... compromising position. What intrigued me so much about this story though, was Aayan. Not only did he have that natural, effortless dominance, but he was also deliberate in his actions (no matter how much he tried to deny it).
Okay, I can follow this a little bit. I mean, sure, your brother is being accused of murder, so yeah, you go search for the best attorney your money can afford. But Aayan didn't really do that, per se. Garrett was no longer practicing law in that manner. He didn't take cases like that, he hadn't been in the spotlight as an attorney since before his big scandal, and Aayan knew little to nothing about him besides what he looked like on his knees and maybe a handful of public facts about cases he handled years prior. But he went in search of him anyway.
Aayan was assertive and very forthcoming in what he wanted, who he wanted, and how he wanted it, which made for a very sexy read. This was my first Tanya Chris book, but it most certainly won't be my last if she keeps delivering books like this. If she can get this detailed and personal in 184 pages, I can't wait to see what she can do with a full length novel. Aftercare is a really great BDSM short-read and I definitely recommend it.
Reviewed by Jordan at Alpha Book Club.
Disclaimer: This book was provided by the author in exchange for an honest review. All thoughts and opinions expressed herein are my own and not influenced by the author or the publisher in any way.
May 17, 2017
Review by The Blogger Girls.
This was a pleasant surprise! This was not your everyday BDSM story. It is about Garrett, a submissive who lost his loving husband and dom to cancer a few years prior, left his high-powered job and has basically lived life on the down low.
Aayan is a Muslim man who seeks out Garrett to help represent his brother against charges of murdering his submissive partner believing someone with his experience will better be able to plead his case. Aayan is immediately attracted to Garrett and has been ever since he saw the photograph of Garrett in a beautiful submissive pose (which his brother had acquired). Aayan is not a dom though and has never practiced any aspect of BDSM. Even though he knows he has dominant tendencies, he has hidden any of those feelings and is at war with himself over those in relation to his religion and upbringing. He struggles with understanding how anyone (including his brother, Syed) could cause hurt and pain to someone they love, even knowing it was consented to, wanted and even needed in some cases.
Garrett was a beautiful character. He also feels an intense attraction to Aayan but is really not sure if he can be in a non-submissive relationship. They tread lightly for a while with Aayan thinking he can make Garrett happy in other ways, i.e. without the SM Garrett believes he also needs. I loved watching Aayan come to the realization of what it would take and what it meant to bring Garrett’s true submission out, as he did in his photograph.
Through this, Garrett works on the case which hits close to home (no pun intended!). With the prosecution trying to push the BDSM is domestic abuse angle, Garrett must find a way to prove otherwise, to the court, as well as to Aayan.
I really liked seeing things from this point of view. It was very interesting to see things from both sides with regards to BDSM and the general public vs. how the actual participants feel, as well as how Aayan’s religion and beliefs played a factor into his finding happiness.
This was my first book by this author, but it most definitely won’t be my last, as this was a very solid and well-written story that I’m sure will stay in my mind for quite some time.
June 12, 2017
A Joyfully Jay review.
4.75 stars
Everything about the premise of this book spoke to me, and I couldn’t wait to read it. Garrett is trying to live his life after the death of his husband; Aayan is trying to reconcile his own desires with his personal beliefs. Add into that a murder trial where the defendant is an innocent man, and I was sold. And I’m so happy to say that this book lived up to every expectation I had.
First off, can I just say, the chemistry between the MCs just rolled off the page. From their very first meeting, they sparked and sizzled, and it just kept getting thicker and sharper as the book went on. They were both working through their own things, trying to find a balance in their life, and I loved the way the author paralleled their internal conflicts. It read as natural and believable, with steps backward for every step forward, while still maintaining the forward momentum. These men got to know each other incredibly well, and used the support and affection that they got from one another to work through their own issues. The D/s here was lovely and beautiful, showcasing everything that a relationship like this should be and needs to be in order to work. There’s nothing too hardcore here, but it layers everything they do.
Garrett had to work through his loss, but he’s already done most of his grieving. When Aayan steps into the picture, he just has to jump over that last hurdle: reconciling his desire for someone new and how that relates to the love he had with his husband. For me, Aayan really had the growth throughout the story. His internal conflict was perfectly done. As a Muslim, he has certain beliefs and morals when it comes to hurting another. And though he’s already come to terms what it means to be gay and Muslim, this was so much harder to reconcile. To watch him work through it, to see his love for Garrett and his inherent need to care for Garrett in the way Garrett needed, and see how that was how he was able to embrace and accept his sadistic side, was utterly captivating.
Read Kris’ review in its entirety here.
4.75 stars
Everything about the premise of this book spoke to me, and I couldn’t wait to read it. Garrett is trying to live his life after the death of his husband; Aayan is trying to reconcile his own desires with his personal beliefs. Add into that a murder trial where the defendant is an innocent man, and I was sold. And I’m so happy to say that this book lived up to every expectation I had.
First off, can I just say, the chemistry between the MCs just rolled off the page. From their very first meeting, they sparked and sizzled, and it just kept getting thicker and sharper as the book went on. They were both working through their own things, trying to find a balance in their life, and I loved the way the author paralleled their internal conflicts. It read as natural and believable, with steps backward for every step forward, while still maintaining the forward momentum. These men got to know each other incredibly well, and used the support and affection that they got from one another to work through their own issues. The D/s here was lovely and beautiful, showcasing everything that a relationship like this should be and needs to be in order to work. There’s nothing too hardcore here, but it layers everything they do.
Garrett had to work through his loss, but he’s already done most of his grieving. When Aayan steps into the picture, he just has to jump over that last hurdle: reconciling his desire for someone new and how that relates to the love he had with his husband. For me, Aayan really had the growth throughout the story. His internal conflict was perfectly done. As a Muslim, he has certain beliefs and morals when it comes to hurting another. And though he’s already come to terms what it means to be gay and Muslim, this was so much harder to reconcile. To watch him work through it, to see his love for Garrett and his inherent need to care for Garrett in the way Garrett needed, and see how that was how he was able to embrace and accept his sadistic side, was utterly captivating.
Read Kris’ review in its entirety here.
October 25, 2019
Book hangover for real. Now stalking all of this author's works.
Garret lost his husband and Dom three years ago, and has since retreated from the world. Until Aayan knocks on his door with a special request - defend Aayan's brother on the charge of murdering his own boyfriend and submissive. Intrigued enough to leave his shell, both because of the nature of the case, and Aayan's persuasiveness, Garret takes the case and delves back into the world of law, kink, and maybe even love.
I was completely impressed by this book on so many levels.
I was truly impressed with the depth of both storylines - not just the romance between Aayan and Garrett, but also the concurrent plot of Syed's trial. I really enjoyed that extra richness that was lent to the story through the external conflict.
I was even more impressed with Aayan. I normally dislike more than a trivial amount of self-deprecation over sexual orientation. Aayan has reconciled his faith with his sexuality, but his attraction to Garrett and his desire to be the Dom that Garrett so obviously needs is proving to test his faith far further. Overall, the BDSM was a huge element in this book, and it was so incredibly well done.
Garret lost his husband and Dom three years ago, and has since retreated from the world. Until Aayan knocks on his door with a special request - defend Aayan's brother on the charge of murdering his own boyfriend and submissive. Intrigued enough to leave his shell, both because of the nature of the case, and Aayan's persuasiveness, Garret takes the case and delves back into the world of law, kink, and maybe even love.
I was completely impressed by this book on so many levels.
I was truly impressed with the depth of both storylines - not just the romance between Aayan and Garrett, but also the concurrent plot of Syed's trial. I really enjoyed that extra richness that was lent to the story through the external conflict.
I was even more impressed with Aayan. I normally dislike more than a trivial amount of self-deprecation over sexual orientation. Aayan has reconciled his faith with his sexuality, but his attraction to Garrett and his desire to be the Dom that Garrett so obviously needs is proving to test his faith far further. Overall, the BDSM was a huge element in this book, and it was so incredibly well done.
Garrett wore a suit like it was armor, hardening himself into the other half of the man Aayan adored. It was that dichotomy he loved—the iron shell that softened to a molten core when his clothes came off. If Garrett had been only softness, Aayan didn’t think he’d be so entranced. Anyone could bend, but it took someone like Garrett to yield, to intentionally, consciously, joyously give way, not because he couldn’t overcome the force being applied but because he chose to sway with it, to own it by becoming one with it.
June 20, 2017
This is not your usual run-of-the-mill BDSM story. The writing was good, as I've come to expect from Tanya Chris, and the plotlines were imaginative. A widowed, submissive lawyer defending a Dom who was being charged with murdering his sub. The fact that the dead sub was white, the Dom follows Islam and enjoys BDSM adds spice to the trial, and the lengths that the prosecution go to to ensure a conviction were eye-opening. When the case collapses at the end, justice was certainly done.
The 'relationship' aspect of the story between Garrett, the widower and Aayed, the brother of the accused, took a back seat in many respects. Aayed is a domineering man who doesn't think he can give Garrett what he needs i.e. a proper power exchange because he doesn't want to hurt him, but the more he falls in love with Garrett, the more feelings that have lain dormant for many years rise to the surface.
A favourite quote.....'All the self doubts, his parents' expectations, his religion's censure, his inability to have sex with his wife on demand - all the ways in which he strove and failed - collapsed beneath the weighty satisfaction of bringing out the submissive in this man.'
The 'relationship' aspect of the story between Garrett, the widower and Aayed, the brother of the accused, took a back seat in many respects. Aayed is a domineering man who doesn't think he can give Garrett what he needs i.e. a proper power exchange because he doesn't want to hurt him, but the more he falls in love with Garrett, the more feelings that have lain dormant for many years rise to the surface.
A favourite quote.....'All the self doubts, his parents' expectations, his religion's censure, his inability to have sex with his wife on demand - all the ways in which he strove and failed - collapsed beneath the weighty satisfaction of bringing out the submissive in this man.'
Want to read
August 3, 2018💝FREE on Amazon today (8/3/2018)!💝
Blurb:
Aayan Denir knows Garrett Hillier was once a high-powered defense attorney, and—thanks to a leaked photograph—he knows Garrett is sexually submissive, which makes him ideally qualified to defend Aayan's brother from the charge of murdering his sub. Aayan would do anything to protect Syed, even if he doesn't understand how Syed could hurt someone he loves. He could never hurt Garrett. He only wants to take care of him—love him, serve him, cherish him. And maybe torture him. Just a little.
Garrett probably shouldn’t be dating his client’s brother. Right? And what’s the use in a confirmed sub dating a guy who doesn’t want to be a Dom anyway? The important thing is to get Syed cleared of the discriminatory murder charge he’s facing. Aayan is a distraction. But for the first time in the three lonely years since Garrett’s husband died, he’s feeling hope, ambition, and desire. Can he give up the pain he craves to find the love he needs?
As Syed’s trial date looms, Aayan and Garrett explore what a BDSM relationship means for them, and what they mean to each other.
Blurb:
Aayan Denir knows Garrett Hillier was once a high-powered defense attorney, and—thanks to a leaked photograph—he knows Garrett is sexually submissive, which makes him ideally qualified to defend Aayan's brother from the charge of murdering his sub. Aayan would do anything to protect Syed, even if he doesn't understand how Syed could hurt someone he loves. He could never hurt Garrett. He only wants to take care of him—love him, serve him, cherish him. And maybe torture him. Just a little.
Garrett probably shouldn’t be dating his client’s brother. Right? And what’s the use in a confirmed sub dating a guy who doesn’t want to be a Dom anyway? The important thing is to get Syed cleared of the discriminatory murder charge he’s facing. Aayan is a distraction. But for the first time in the three lonely years since Garrett’s husband died, he’s feeling hope, ambition, and desire. Can he give up the pain he craves to find the love he needs?
As Syed’s trial date looms, Aayan and Garrett explore what a BDSM relationship means for them, and what they mean to each other.
June 6, 2017
Shout out to Tanya Chris for sending me a copy of Aftercare.
I liked this book about people and life. There's a court case and there's dominance and submission and people who need it and others that condemn it. It's like the court case is a comparison about how the main guys feel about BDSM and how other people in the community feel about it.
Aayan and his brother Syed are Muslims and gay and one likes BDSM and is charged about his bf's death. Did he kill him by beating him because he's a sadist? Is it as simple as someone is a sadistic person and the other is a victim to the sadist? Is life one size for everyone and we're all judge and jury about it?
There's a few sexy times between Garrett who is Syed's lawyer and his brother Aayan because they have to find out whether they can work. They're also kinda like this court case, will it go well for them or not? Ho! Some romance in the air! ;)
Cocky Reviews worthy book so review is coming to the blog!
I liked this book about people and life. There's a court case and there's dominance and submission and people who need it and others that condemn it. It's like the court case is a comparison about how the main guys feel about BDSM and how other people in the community feel about it.
Aayan and his brother Syed are Muslims and gay and one likes BDSM and is charged about his bf's death. Did he kill him by beating him because he's a sadist? Is it as simple as someone is a sadistic person and the other is a victim to the sadist? Is life one size for everyone and we're all judge and jury about it?
There's a few sexy times between Garrett who is Syed's lawyer and his brother Aayan because they have to find out whether they can work. They're also kinda like this court case, will it go well for them or not? Ho! Some romance in the air! ;)
Cocky Reviews worthy book so review is coming to the blog!
April 14, 2018
4 stars. Tanya Chris has got a new fan. Between this book and the last book I read by her, I will read anything she decides to publish now. This was pretty damn good.
Garrett and Aayan are such a dynamic and interesting couple. I really liked their relationship and all of the aspects of it. Aayan and his religion and his struggles with accepting being a Dom, Garrett and wanting Aayan to be his Dom but also grieving his deceased husband. It's just a lot but it works. I really liked the religion and race aspect and I think the author did a good job handling the topics because there are some important topics talked about in this book.
The plot was intriguing and kept me hooked and everything wrapped up pretty nicely. I'm enjoying this author's work a lot and I'm excited to read more from her.
Garrett and Aayan are such a dynamic and interesting couple. I really liked their relationship and all of the aspects of it. Aayan and his religion and his struggles with accepting being a Dom, Garrett and wanting Aayan to be his Dom but also grieving his deceased husband. It's just a lot but it works. I really liked the religion and race aspect and I think the author did a good job handling the topics because there are some important topics talked about in this book.
The plot was intriguing and kept me hooked and everything wrapped up pretty nicely. I'm enjoying this author's work a lot and I'm excited to read more from her.
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