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Love First: A New Approach to Intervention for Alcoholism & Drug Addiction
If alcoholics and addicts won't accept help until they're ready, what gets them ready? This book provides an answer in clear, concise terms. Dispelling two damaging myths -- that an addict has to hit bottom and that intervention must be confrontational -- the authors' proven approach puts love first and shows families, step by step, what to do next. "A convincing new approach to intervention that puts love and respect first." Jack Canfield, coauthor of Chicken Soup for the Soul Series
"Building a team, choosing a chairperson, anticipating objections, using checklists, and rehearsing for the intervention itself -- the reader will find it all here " Robert M. Morse, M.D., Professor emeritus, psychiatry, Mayo Medical School and Former director of Addictive Disorders Services, Mayo Clinic.
"Love First is destined to become the new classic on intervention for alcoholism and drug addiction. The most comprehensive book available on the life-saving technique of intervention, Love First will save lives A worthy successor to Vernon Johnsons Ill Quit Tomorrow."
--Kathy Ketcham, Coauthor, Beyond the Influence and The Spirituality of Imperfection
"Love First provides the most detailed account yet of how intervention works. A significant contribution to intervention literature. An empowering antidote to the disease of addiction."
--William l. White, author Slaying the Dragon: The History of Addiction Treatment
"Building a team, choosing a chairperson, anticipating objections, using checklists, and rehearsing for the intervention itself -- the reader will find it all here " Robert M. Morse, M.D., Professor emeritus, psychiatry, Mayo Medical School and Former director of Addictive Disorders Services, Mayo Clinic.
"Love First is destined to become the new classic on intervention for alcoholism and drug addiction. The most comprehensive book available on the life-saving technique of intervention, Love First will save lives A worthy successor to Vernon Johnsons Ill Quit Tomorrow."
--Kathy Ketcham, Coauthor, Beyond the Influence and The Spirituality of Imperfection
"Love First provides the most detailed account yet of how intervention works. A significant contribution to intervention literature. An empowering antidote to the disease of addiction."
--William l. White, author Slaying the Dragon: The History of Addiction Treatment
- GenresAddictionPsychology
264 pages, Paperback
First published September 1, 2000
131 people are currently reading
225 people want to read
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Displaying 1 - 18 of 18 reviews
April 8, 2023
My family lives with a family tree full of addictions. I like the way this book speaks of loved ones and gives much insight into healing for me. I believe in love always.
January 9, 2015
This is an extraordinary book. I found it when researching interventions because of concerns about a family member's addictions. The book is based in both evidence, in terms of what works, and also in love and respect.
Through reading this book and hiring an interventionist (as recommended), along with a LOT of planning and heartfelt discussions, our intervention was successful and the family member remains clean and sober two years later. There are no guarantees in this process, of course, but when our family members prayerfully adopted the approach recommended by the authors, we were able to pull off a complex intervention in a way that we could be proud and conveyed our deep love for this family member, regardless of whether it was ultimately successful or not.
I remain extremely grateful to this book's authors for making is information available to the lay person. I do recommend consulting with professionals as well, as there is much at stake in any intervention. But with this book as a tool, you will have a fighting chance at conducting a loving, successful intervention.
Through reading this book and hiring an interventionist (as recommended), along with a LOT of planning and heartfelt discussions, our intervention was successful and the family member remains clean and sober two years later. There are no guarantees in this process, of course, but when our family members prayerfully adopted the approach recommended by the authors, we were able to pull off a complex intervention in a way that we could be proud and conveyed our deep love for this family member, regardless of whether it was ultimately successful or not.
I remain extremely grateful to this book's authors for making is information available to the lay person. I do recommend consulting with professionals as well, as there is much at stake in any intervention. But with this book as a tool, you will have a fighting chance at conducting a loving, successful intervention.
March 20, 2014
With this book and Vern Johnson's classic "I'll Quit Tomorrow", we have the best information available on interventions and how they are used successfully, in most cases, to bring help to an active alcoholic. While the authors maintain that interventions can be designed and run by non-professionals, using a licensed addiction counselor trained to facilitate interventions greatly improves chances of success. Remember, though, an intervention is only the 1st step in a long process of recovery.
May 22, 2021
Good resource for families of addicts
October 20, 2021
What we have here is a gift to the recovery community and to those wishing to help the still suffering alcoholic. Thank you for your service.
January 30, 2023
Helpful step-by-step book for staging an intervention from a place of love, not confrontation.
December 18, 2020
This book is such a great resource for people who are considering an intervention for someone in their life, or even just someone who wants to know more about interventions. I do have some major criticisms about it though. I HATE the binary gendered language. There is no reason not to use they rather than switching between he and she. It's annoying and uninclusive. Additionally, there is a lot of bias in this book. There are opinions presented as fact (i.e. the person you are intervening on will never be able to stay sober without the help of a twelve step program). This mindset is super harmful to people who could've had success staying sober another method but are constantly told they aren't "doing" sobriety right.
June 5, 2025
Not an easy read. This book came to me at a very specific time for a very specific situation. I was not looking for it, just casually found it one day as I shifted through hundreds of books at a sale. It was a life-changing experience reading this att he time that I did. Gave me tools and new ways to looks at situations and people that I would never had thought about. Definitely help me and the people around me to deal with this thing called addiction before it completely destroyed us. Would hundred percent recommend this to anyone dealing with a loved one with addiction.
January 12, 2021
Must read if you are facing the hell of drugs and alcohol.....
Anyone affected by a users choices that needs a greater understanding of what’s really happening. Also how to effectively approach elevating them and yourselves out of the cycle.
Anyone affected by a users choices that needs a greater understanding of what’s really happening. Also how to effectively approach elevating them and yourselves out of the cycle.
February 10, 2021
I really enjoyed this book. I found some information concerning, such as propagating that the Johson method of intervention is the most effective. Studies comparing the Johnson method to other forms of intervention, like CRAFT, have shown CRAFT is much more effective.
Regardless, I can understand the use of the Johnson method in certain instances or as a last resort. This book was very clarifying as to the entire process of family-led substance use interventions. It was almost a how-to guide for how to create and carry out an effective intervention. What was most surprising to me was the strict guidelines that must be followed to make this process most successful. I did not realize the emphasis on minute details such as the placement of certain family and friends, how long or short their letters are, who leads the intervention, their limited ability to talk beyond what their letters communicate. I had believed the Johnson method to be emotionally jarring and cruel. I can see that if done correctly, it has the potential to be a more positive and controlled experience. I still don't think it is the most effective route to engaging a loved one into treatment, but it seems to serve as an option.
Regardless, I can understand the use of the Johnson method in certain instances or as a last resort. This book was very clarifying as to the entire process of family-led substance use interventions. It was almost a how-to guide for how to create and carry out an effective intervention. What was most surprising to me was the strict guidelines that must be followed to make this process most successful. I did not realize the emphasis on minute details such as the placement of certain family and friends, how long or short their letters are, who leads the intervention, their limited ability to talk beyond what their letters communicate. I had believed the Johnson method to be emotionally jarring and cruel. I can see that if done correctly, it has the potential to be a more positive and controlled experience. I still don't think it is the most effective route to engaging a loved one into treatment, but it seems to serve as an option.
January 25, 2009
This is a great discovery. I have always been of the "you can't help the addict until the addict is ready to help themselves" mentality. This book challenges that tenet. The authors believe that the those of us faced with dealing with an addict need to ask what will it take to get the addict ready to accept help.
They quote from the work of Dr. Vernon Johnson who some consider to be the grandfather of intervention techniques back in the 1960's.
A couple of quotes that really struck me are as follows:
"The reason alcholics are unable to perceive what is happening to them is understandable...For many reasons, they are progressively unable to keep track of their own behavior and begin to lose contact with their emotions...Alcoholics don't know what is happening inside of them."
And this one, which is, perhaps, the foundation of the techniques discussed in this book:
"The solution for addiction cannot come from a mind controlled by alcohol or other drugs. It must come from an outside source."
They quote from the work of Dr. Vernon Johnson who some consider to be the grandfather of intervention techniques back in the 1960's.
A couple of quotes that really struck me are as follows:
"The reason alcholics are unable to perceive what is happening to them is understandable...For many reasons, they are progressively unable to keep track of their own behavior and begin to lose contact with their emotions...Alcoholics don't know what is happening inside of them."
And this one, which is, perhaps, the foundation of the techniques discussed in this book:
"The solution for addiction cannot come from a mind controlled by alcohol or other drugs. It must come from an outside source."
February 29, 2016
Very Practical. One of the best resources on intervention.
I have personally loaned this book to friends who needed immediate help.
Very practical.
This book is something anyone should read if they are thinking about attending an intervention.
Judy Herzanek, Co-Author:
Why Don't They Just Quit? What families and friends need to know about addiction and recovery
90-Minute DVD: Why Don't They Just QUIT? DVD Roundtable Discussion: What families and friends need to know about addiction and recovery.
I have personally loaned this book to friends who needed immediate help.
Very practical.
This book is something anyone should read if they are thinking about attending an intervention.
Judy Herzanek, Co-Author:
Why Don't They Just Quit? What families and friends need to know about addiction and recovery
90-Minute DVD: Why Don't They Just QUIT? DVD Roundtable Discussion: What families and friends need to know about addiction and recovery.
September 23, 2010
I read this book in the summer of 2005 and it inspired me to initiate an intervention for my dad. He is now celebrating five years of sobriety. I'm so glad that I found this book, that my family followed the advice that it provides and that my dad had and still has the courage and desire to fight the disease of alcoholism.
May 25, 2021
For those of us struggling with addiction of any variety and intensity in the family, the information in this book is cutting edge, my best and favorite for intervention with love. So much great help shared in this book - it will guide folks in helping an addict's loved ones find help and hope. I highly recommend it! It is my favorite!
September 16, 2007
Fortunately, I never needed to implement this but it is a step by step concrete guide and is quite helpful.
September 27, 2015
Wonderful comprehensive book for anyone who loves an addict. My only suggestion would be for an abbreviated version for families with a very short timeline in intervention planning.
April 11, 2021
Debra and Jeff Jay are the leaders in addiction education and recovery. If you have an addict in your life there is hope. Read these books and you will find answers.
April 11, 2021
Excited for the new edition to hit the bookstore shelves. Debra and Jeff Jay are passionate about recovery! Their website is a valuable resource for recovery.
Displaying 1 - 18 of 18 reviews