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Stainer
New York City, 1975: Decent-hearted but spoiled Jewish college kid Ben Steiner is naively possessed by an overwhelming desire to be cool. At a springtime party on the night of his twenty-first birthday, he meets two people: Rebecca Glaser, the longed-for sweet girl of his dreams, and P.T. Deighland, a beguilingly knavish wiseacre from Princeton. Seduced by Deighland’s bold irreverence while simultaneously succumbing to his own temptations, Ben makes a cascading series of unfortunate choices which not only threaten his budding relationship with Rebecca, but expose him to ruin at the hands of a ravishing but ruthless fashion model named Anthea Montague.
Against the background of a vanished period in American history, STAINER offers a bittersweet nostalgic trip back to a less complex world, during a time of incautious excesses that, while deceptively fun and carefree, in due course forced many unwary youngsters like Benjamin Steiner to learn some necessary –albeit painful– lessons about growing up.
Against the background of a vanished period in American history, STAINER offers a bittersweet nostalgic trip back to a less complex world, during a time of incautious excesses that, while deceptively fun and carefree, in due course forced many unwary youngsters like Benjamin Steiner to learn some necessary –albeit painful– lessons about growing up.
- GenresFiction
344 pages, Paperback
Published May 30, 2017
5 people are currently reading
514 people want to read
About the author
Iolanthe Woulff
2 books53 followersIolanthe "Lannie" Woulff came into the world as a male during the fifth year of the Truman presidency, which means that she is rapidly acquiring the status of an antique. In 1958 her family moved from Manhattan to the island of St. Thomas, which in those days was a sparsely-populated tropical dot in the Caribbean. There "Nate", as Lannie was known in those days, spent several idyllic years gleefully swinging from jungle vines and swimming on the world's most beautiful unspoiled beaches. She treasures many poignant memories of that lost paradise, which, alas, is no longer.
Moving back to the mainland in 1964, Lannie attended The Maret School in Washington, D.C. As the Vietnam War raged and protest movements convulsed the nation, she gained admission to Princeton, and after escaping the inaugural Selective Service lottery by a scant fourteen points, graduated in 1973 with a degree in English. For several ensuing years she lived in New York City and worked for her uncle, who was then developing an early prototype hybrid vehicle. That was during the Studio 54 era, the so-called "Me Decade", which Lannie experienced at full throttle while writing a coming-of-age novel which remained unpublished.
In 1980, at the urging of her younger brother, she moved to Israel, where together they opened a diving business on the Red Sea. When the Lebanon War wiped out the tourist trade and with it their business, she returned stateside to raise pedigreed Black Angus cows on a family farm in northern Virginia's famous Hunt Country. The rolling hills and pastoral beauty of that area provide the setting for SHE'S MY DAD.
Succumbing to the lure of the West in 1987, she finally settled for good in the California resort town of Palm Springs. Ten years later, fulfilling a lifelong imperative, Lannie commenced the complex and emotionally turbulent process of gender transition. During the process she authored a column called "The T Dance" in one of the local LGBT magazines, before turning her attention full-time to fiction writing.
Lannie is the proud parent of a beautiful and accomplished daughter,a new grandparent, loves to tease her generic tabby cat Xena, and enjoys spending time with her eminent father, the Pulitzer Prize-winning author Herman Wouk.
SHE'S MY DAD is Lannie's debut effort. Believing that one must always retain a sense of humor, she is writing another novel.
5/30/2017 UPDATE: Forty-some years after she threw it in her trunk, Lannie has disinterred, rewritten and published her very first novel, a coming-of-age tale called STAINER. Set in 1970s New York, it is about a nice but naive Jewish college boy's struggles to navigate the risks and temptations of that freewheeling time known as the 'Me' Decade.
Moving back to the mainland in 1964, Lannie attended The Maret School in Washington, D.C. As the Vietnam War raged and protest movements convulsed the nation, she gained admission to Princeton, and after escaping the inaugural Selective Service lottery by a scant fourteen points, graduated in 1973 with a degree in English. For several ensuing years she lived in New York City and worked for her uncle, who was then developing an early prototype hybrid vehicle. That was during the Studio 54 era, the so-called "Me Decade", which Lannie experienced at full throttle while writing a coming-of-age novel which remained unpublished.
In 1980, at the urging of her younger brother, she moved to Israel, where together they opened a diving business on the Red Sea. When the Lebanon War wiped out the tourist trade and with it their business, she returned stateside to raise pedigreed Black Angus cows on a family farm in northern Virginia's famous Hunt Country. The rolling hills and pastoral beauty of that area provide the setting for SHE'S MY DAD.
Succumbing to the lure of the West in 1987, she finally settled for good in the California resort town of Palm Springs. Ten years later, fulfilling a lifelong imperative, Lannie commenced the complex and emotionally turbulent process of gender transition. During the process she authored a column called "The T Dance" in one of the local LGBT magazines, before turning her attention full-time to fiction writing.
Lannie is the proud parent of a beautiful and accomplished daughter,a new grandparent, loves to tease her generic tabby cat Xena, and enjoys spending time with her eminent father, the Pulitzer Prize-winning author Herman Wouk.
SHE'S MY DAD is Lannie's debut effort. Believing that one must always retain a sense of humor, she is writing another novel.
5/30/2017 UPDATE: Forty-some years after she threw it in her trunk, Lannie has disinterred, rewritten and published her very first novel, a coming-of-age tale called STAINER. Set in 1970s New York, it is about a nice but naive Jewish college boy's struggles to navigate the risks and temptations of that freewheeling time known as the 'Me' Decade.
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Displaying 1 - 17 of 17 reviews
October 19, 2017
College student Steiner considers himself “more American than Semitic” for all that he lodges in the Jewish house. He’s observant, just not a fanatic. And he sees nothing wrong with making non-Jewish friends, though he must admit, “Babylon can be deadly impressive.” One long summer, just as he’s about to embark on his first serious relationship with a beautiful, and available, Jewish girl, he finds himself falling for mesmerizing vices instead. Drink was part of his life before. Now sexual temptation and drugs offer ease as he tries to fit himself into a different scene. Work suffers. Beauty betrays. And it’s all just so terribly alluring.
Steiner feels real. He agonizes over breaking the Sabbath—can he really not light a woman’s cigarette—then he slips and falls inexorably, though always escaping disaster. Rather like a romance novel written from a man’s point of view, the story throws obstacles in the way of a failing love that must surely have been true, and leaves the reader wanting to beg the protagonist, no don’t do it! Rather like a romance novel too, the characters and plot offer a sense of hope, even as they flail, with genuine humor and honest trials keeping the story fast-moving and intriguing to read. Surely this tale will turn out alright, one way or another, but you’ll have to read it to find out.
I loved the humanity of characters good and bad, the immediacy of their now-distant world, the relevance of their trials, and the promise of their hope. Stainer rises above its material and reads like a classic tale of temptation, decline and fall, with true love in the wings. I really enjoyed it.
Disclosure: I was given an ecopy as a gift and I offer my honest review.
Steiner feels real. He agonizes over breaking the Sabbath—can he really not light a woman’s cigarette—then he slips and falls inexorably, though always escaping disaster. Rather like a romance novel written from a man’s point of view, the story throws obstacles in the way of a failing love that must surely have been true, and leaves the reader wanting to beg the protagonist, no don’t do it! Rather like a romance novel too, the characters and plot offer a sense of hope, even as they flail, with genuine humor and honest trials keeping the story fast-moving and intriguing to read. Surely this tale will turn out alright, one way or another, but you’ll have to read it to find out.
I loved the humanity of characters good and bad, the immediacy of their now-distant world, the relevance of their trials, and the promise of their hope. Stainer rises above its material and reads like a classic tale of temptation, decline and fall, with true love in the wings. I really enjoyed it.
Disclosure: I was given an ecopy as a gift and I offer my honest review.
July 23, 2017
“It is a poignant truth of our heedless youthful years, that the events and encounters of a single night can so alter the course of a young person’s life that it will be changed forever”.
Benjamin Steiner, spoiled Columbia undergraduate, devout Orthodox Jew and virgin meets two women who will change his life forever.
P.T. Deighland, snarky Princeton undergraduate, drug dealer, player and Benjamin’s means of rebellion.
Rebecca Glaser, new N.Y.U. transfer to Columbia, intelligent, Jewish, and is leaving for Israel for a month to Benjamin’s surprise and frustration.
Anthea Montague, Ford model, Southern, beautiful and Benjamin’s yaitzer ha’ra (Hebrew for ‘evil inclination’).
See my complete review at The Eclectic Review .
Benjamin Steiner, spoiled Columbia undergraduate, devout Orthodox Jew and virgin meets two women who will change his life forever.
P.T. Deighland, snarky Princeton undergraduate, drug dealer, player and Benjamin’s means of rebellion.
Rebecca Glaser, new N.Y.U. transfer to Columbia, intelligent, Jewish, and is leaving for Israel for a month to Benjamin’s surprise and frustration.
Anthea Montague, Ford model, Southern, beautiful and Benjamin’s yaitzer ha’ra (Hebrew for ‘evil inclination’).
See my complete review at The Eclectic Review .
July 2, 2017
Stainer - by Iolanthe Woulff. ISBN 978-1546647126 Published by CreateSpace Independent Publishing Platform, 2017. Reviewer received book from Author as e-book in pdf format.
Review by Chris Phillips
How many friends can a freshly 21-year old Jewish man make in a few days or at least in a few months? Benjamin Steiner is just such a person. He has just turned twenty-one, and he is a junior at Columbia. He lives in a Jewish hostel-type building with several others. The building, Rabbi Yitzhak Teller Memorial Residence Hall, is a converted abandoned building that houses Jewish scholars from Columbia. It is known as Beit Yitzhak or “B.” This is the focal point for much of the action here, but don’t believe for a minute that young Ben, embarking on his 21st birthday celebration, is going to be hampered by old traditions. Tonight is the time to get experience that has been denied him so far in life.
The story begins as Ben journeys to the “B” for the party that comes at the end of finals week. It is the highlight of the “B’s” season and one where Ben hopes to at least meet an attractive girl before the end of this birthday evening.
In a strangely prescient encounter, Ben meets a street evangelist with a sign, “Whatsoever a man soweth, that shall he also reap, Galatians 6:7.” This night is going to be one of Ben’s most memorable.
So comes the party. Ben is an active participant and anxious to see what new people might show up. This fateful night, Ben meets two very particular people. Rebecca Glaser is the girl of his dreams that comes to the party and eventually moves into the “B.” P.T. Deighland is the friend of a younger brother of a resident at the “B.” This explains the major thrust of the story.
The tale starts slowly but actually builds through the slowness into an in-depth analysis of a young man messing up his life in celebrating his 21st birthday.
Things keep getting worse and worse. There are times when Ben looks like he is destined to become another statistic but always a redeeming factor brings him back.
The next few months become a dichotomy, with Ben hiding the other side of his life from those Jewish friends that are residents and friends of his from before the fateful party.
There is a climactic, desperate and final crash that shakes Ben to his roots and makes him realize that sometimes friends are not friends, but users and abusers.
The story is one of loss and redemption with a properly ironic twist and ending.
This reviewer would recommend this book for any interested in coming of age books, in Manhattan college life and just life in general. It would be of particular interest to those who have read Iolanthe Woulff’s previous book, She’s My Dad.
5 Stars.
Review by Chris Phillips
How many friends can a freshly 21-year old Jewish man make in a few days or at least in a few months? Benjamin Steiner is just such a person. He has just turned twenty-one, and he is a junior at Columbia. He lives in a Jewish hostel-type building with several others. The building, Rabbi Yitzhak Teller Memorial Residence Hall, is a converted abandoned building that houses Jewish scholars from Columbia. It is known as Beit Yitzhak or “B.” This is the focal point for much of the action here, but don’t believe for a minute that young Ben, embarking on his 21st birthday celebration, is going to be hampered by old traditions. Tonight is the time to get experience that has been denied him so far in life.
The story begins as Ben journeys to the “B” for the party that comes at the end of finals week. It is the highlight of the “B’s” season and one where Ben hopes to at least meet an attractive girl before the end of this birthday evening.
In a strangely prescient encounter, Ben meets a street evangelist with a sign, “Whatsoever a man soweth, that shall he also reap, Galatians 6:7.” This night is going to be one of Ben’s most memorable.
So comes the party. Ben is an active participant and anxious to see what new people might show up. This fateful night, Ben meets two very particular people. Rebecca Glaser is the girl of his dreams that comes to the party and eventually moves into the “B.” P.T. Deighland is the friend of a younger brother of a resident at the “B.” This explains the major thrust of the story.
The tale starts slowly but actually builds through the slowness into an in-depth analysis of a young man messing up his life in celebrating his 21st birthday.
Things keep getting worse and worse. There are times when Ben looks like he is destined to become another statistic but always a redeeming factor brings him back.
The next few months become a dichotomy, with Ben hiding the other side of his life from those Jewish friends that are residents and friends of his from before the fateful party.
There is a climactic, desperate and final crash that shakes Ben to his roots and makes him realize that sometimes friends are not friends, but users and abusers.
The story is one of loss and redemption with a properly ironic twist and ending.
This reviewer would recommend this book for any interested in coming of age books, in Manhattan college life and just life in general. It would be of particular interest to those who have read Iolanthe Woulff’s previous book, She’s My Dad.
5 Stars.
June 28, 2017
Stainer could easily be a parallel universe of classic story The Catcher in the Rye. Whereas misguided Holden Caulfield was pessimistic about the “cool kids” and the lifestyle they lived, misguided Ben Steiner is optimistic and believes they have the key to changing his boring Jewish life. His obsession with fitting the standards of cool – with examples such as P.T. Deighland, the mysterious pothead who seemingly cares about little, extravagant model Anthea Montague, or Don Cornelius and various other black guys who Ben is convinced are “naturally cool” – is laughably relatable and, like for so many, the epitome of his downfall.
Iolanthe Woulff’s story explores how confidence and ignorance go hand in hand when one ventures on a journey of self-discovery, and how one struggles to hold on to pieces of their identity (the part Ben identifies as “Steiner”) without losing another piece they so desperately want (the part Ben identifies as “Stainer”). Woulff cleverly highlights this struggle by mixing Jewish terms and culture and putting Ben in enticing situations his faith does not allow throughout the story.
A delightful, heart-warming tale that speaks to the outsider in all of us.
Brache James
Apex Reviews
Iolanthe Woulff’s story explores how confidence and ignorance go hand in hand when one ventures on a journey of self-discovery, and how one struggles to hold on to pieces of their identity (the part Ben identifies as “Steiner”) without losing another piece they so desperately want (the part Ben identifies as “Stainer”). Woulff cleverly highlights this struggle by mixing Jewish terms and culture and putting Ben in enticing situations his faith does not allow throughout the story.
A delightful, heart-warming tale that speaks to the outsider in all of us.
Brache James
Apex Reviews
May 31, 2017
STAINER struck me as a simple and straightforward book, but that was just the foundation. The author’s genius and originality portrayed universal problems in a unique manner which grabbed me from page one.
I was thoroughly impressed by some of the more explicit episodes, which can be challenging for some writers to convey without waxing gratuitous. I felt like a voyeuristic fly on the wall and was at once embarrassed and compelled to watch as Woulff locked me in the room to witness Ben’s sexual awakening/demolition. Brilliant, brilliant stuff.
As a modern “out of practice” Jew, I could relate to Ben’s conflict with the tenets and practices of his faith in a modern world that packages religious conviction like gourmet food—the more exotic and flavorful it is, the more followers will buy in. But some are happy to grab a Big Mac and be on their way.
Initially I found it easy to compare Ben Steiner’s evolution in this coming-of-age tome to that of Holden Caulfield or, at times, Portnoy. But the further I read, the more obvious it was that STAINER stands alone in a unique, gritty, absorbing, hilarious and fresh class of its own.
Yeah. STAINER. It will leave a permanent impression on me.
I was thoroughly impressed by some of the more explicit episodes, which can be challenging for some writers to convey without waxing gratuitous. I felt like a voyeuristic fly on the wall and was at once embarrassed and compelled to watch as Woulff locked me in the room to witness Ben’s sexual awakening/demolition. Brilliant, brilliant stuff.
As a modern “out of practice” Jew, I could relate to Ben’s conflict with the tenets and practices of his faith in a modern world that packages religious conviction like gourmet food—the more exotic and flavorful it is, the more followers will buy in. But some are happy to grab a Big Mac and be on their way.
Initially I found it easy to compare Ben Steiner’s evolution in this coming-of-age tome to that of Holden Caulfield or, at times, Portnoy. But the further I read, the more obvious it was that STAINER stands alone in a unique, gritty, absorbing, hilarious and fresh class of its own.
Yeah. STAINER. It will leave a permanent impression on me.
June 27, 2017
Stainer is a well-written and good summer read. It reminds me of reading Catcher In The Rye and Marjorie Morningstar when I was a teen.
November 8, 2017
“Stainer” is a cautionary tale of a youth torn between the worldly façade of success and the work it takes to develop real lasting relationships.
Read full review in the 2017 November issue of InD'tale Magazine.
Read full review in the 2017 November issue of InD'tale Magazine.
August 28, 2017
Sort of a seventies Jewish coming of age.
A powerful story of a young Observant Jewish man's spoiled life, dabbling in drugs and a very un-kosher lifestyle.
A painful encounter when his worlds collide. Ending with a trip to Israel to get back in touch with himself and a closer approximation of an Observant life.
Heavy duty, painful and well written.
The autobiographical foreword is a bite sized bonus, giving some insight into the author's own complete struggles.
I received a free copy from InstaFreebie, as well as an arc copy. I also purchased a copy of this book from Amazon.
My review is honestly and freely given.
I'd recommend this book to anyone who is looking for a serious read and some self reflection. Not a flippant book at all, as I feared in its early chapters. It reminds us how easily little things can lead very easily to avenues that offer a host of choices - walking a girl to a cab, running into someone who is a friend of a brother of a friend hen out and about, trying out a lifestyle much more wild than you've lived.
It also leaves us with the hope that even bad choices can lead to other paths for relative happiness in our lives.
A powerful story of a young Observant Jewish man's spoiled life, dabbling in drugs and a very un-kosher lifestyle.
A painful encounter when his worlds collide. Ending with a trip to Israel to get back in touch with himself and a closer approximation of an Observant life.
Heavy duty, painful and well written.
The autobiographical foreword is a bite sized bonus, giving some insight into the author's own complete struggles.
I received a free copy from InstaFreebie, as well as an arc copy. I also purchased a copy of this book from Amazon.
My review is honestly and freely given.
I'd recommend this book to anyone who is looking for a serious read and some self reflection. Not a flippant book at all, as I feared in its early chapters. It reminds us how easily little things can lead very easily to avenues that offer a host of choices - walking a girl to a cab, running into someone who is a friend of a brother of a friend hen out and about, trying out a lifestyle much more wild than you've lived.
It also leaves us with the hope that even bad choices can lead to other paths for relative happiness in our lives.
September 30, 2017
I received a free copy of this book through Story Cartel in exchange for an honest review.
This is a book of that special time in life when you're invincible, when you can do nothing wrong and the sky is the limit... Until it's not, and the world you thought you owned comes crashing down around you due to your own stupidity.
Benjamin is a Jewish youth, just 21 and trying so hard to be a man and act grown up with friends of similar ages and a variety of backgrounds. Reading the dialogue between them sounds like they're making an effort to sound grown up using old fashioned terms (think Great Gatsby) when really they sound more pretentious. (I can't judge, we've all been there.) He makes a wealth of poor decisions including drugs, alcohol, and a model, and thinks he's getting away with it, until things collapse upon themselves dramatically. The epilogue shows some hope for his future and leaves the reader on a high note.
The book is elegantly written, including a preface that's a glimpse into the author's world. I'm already looking forward to reading the author's other book, She's My Dad.
This is a book of that special time in life when you're invincible, when you can do nothing wrong and the sky is the limit... Until it's not, and the world you thought you owned comes crashing down around you due to your own stupidity.
Benjamin is a Jewish youth, just 21 and trying so hard to be a man and act grown up with friends of similar ages and a variety of backgrounds. Reading the dialogue between them sounds like they're making an effort to sound grown up using old fashioned terms (think Great Gatsby) when really they sound more pretentious. (I can't judge, we've all been there.) He makes a wealth of poor decisions including drugs, alcohol, and a model, and thinks he's getting away with it, until things collapse upon themselves dramatically. The epilogue shows some hope for his future and leaves the reader on a high note.
The book is elegantly written, including a preface that's a glimpse into the author's world. I'm already looking forward to reading the author's other book, She's My Dad.
October 24, 2017
Ellen’s STAINER Review
I listened to an audio tape of STAINER. Initially, I wasn’t captivated with the story, but as I listened on, I became more involved with the characters and didn’t want to put the book down. There is a sense of impending doom in the plot due to bad choices that the main character, Benjamin Steiner, continually makes. One can feel his uncomfortable nature as he delves into experimenting with temptations outside his Orthodox Jewish world.
Benjamin’s relationships with the love of his life versus those of the people that exploit him constantly remind us of the 1970s time of free love, drug use, and general apathy. Ben is initially a sweet unassuming person with steadfast morals, who turns to the darker side of life to experience a world outside of his comfort zone. He is continually warned by others to stay away from what are considered to be evil people, but needs to find out for himself because he is so intrigued.
I was a bit disappointed in the ending because it happened so abruptly; however, I was left satisfied with what was to become of the main character.
I listened to an audio tape of STAINER. Initially, I wasn’t captivated with the story, but as I listened on, I became more involved with the characters and didn’t want to put the book down. There is a sense of impending doom in the plot due to bad choices that the main character, Benjamin Steiner, continually makes. One can feel his uncomfortable nature as he delves into experimenting with temptations outside his Orthodox Jewish world.
Benjamin’s relationships with the love of his life versus those of the people that exploit him constantly remind us of the 1970s time of free love, drug use, and general apathy. Ben is initially a sweet unassuming person with steadfast morals, who turns to the darker side of life to experience a world outside of his comfort zone. He is continually warned by others to stay away from what are considered to be evil people, but needs to find out for himself because he is so intrigued.
I was a bit disappointed in the ending because it happened so abruptly; however, I was left satisfied with what was to become of the main character.
September 13, 2017
This books shows you what happen when you decide to change in order to go with the flow. Sometimes you don't fell fine just been yourself and in this story is perfectly portrayed what happens when those little changes sometimes are not so little and when you left behind your ownself in the end without looking back you end up making a lot of bad decisions and sometimes fix yourself back is not enough to solve your problems. I really liked the way Ben tries to fit into his new life and how he cames to realize his mistakes and keep going. I received a free copy of this book and voluntarily chose to share my honest review.
September 22, 2017
I greatly enjoyed this novel by Iolanthe Woulff. Stainer is a powerful and provocative coming of age story. The incredible attention to contextual details, especially in the dialogue, brings this narrative to life. It is fast-paced, emotional, tortured and deep; it touched my soul. Beautifully written and an author to look out for.
January 8, 2018
A coming of age story of Jewish college boy looking to belong and find love.
September 28, 2017
Reviewed by Carol Hoyer for Reader Views (8/17)
“Stainer” by Iolanthe Woulff is a flashback to times in the 70’s when young adults were looking to find themselves and be cool, yet still observe religious traditions.
Ben Steiner, a college undergraduate, lives in a communal house for Jewish students. He loves the atmosphere, customs, and peers who have the same beliefs as he does. Ben wants more from life however, and on his 21st birthday, he fights his strict religious beliefs and meets up with individuals who introduce him to the dark side of friendship, and how we often self-sabotage our religion and beliefs in order to be accepted by others.
Woulff does a fantastic job of describing life in the 70's as a young adult trying to come to terms with following cultural expectations of the Jewish community, wanting to be popular, the loss of virginity, and testing the laws of freedom. It is only human nature to want to spread your wings, test the waters, and sometimes push the envelope as one grows as a young adult.
Growing up in the 70's, Woulff's interpretation of the era was a trip down memory lane for me. The speech, fashion, and quest to be popular were among the common themes of some friends I knew in college, who jeopardized their own convictions. Not having much knowledge of LGBT issues during that time, I have since learned much. I believe that Woulff's writing on the issues of sabotage and being used by so called friends or groups still hold true today.
I loved the preface of the author's journey as a transgender writer. Starting out as "Nate" in 1978 and finally publishing this novel four decades later as a sixty-seven-year-old transgender female, Woulff provides great insight into how perspectives change. Remembering the issues and the avoidance of individuals who came out during that era, today’s society still has issues, but hopefully we have become more knowledgeable and accepting of people for who they are.
As an avid reader and book reviewer, it wasn't too many years ago I would not have even considered books about LGBT topics. Since then I have met many wonderful friends and authors who have shared their experiences on this subject. Sadly some of those individuals were not accepted by family or colleagues as their true person.
I highly recommend “Stainer” by Iolanthe Woulff. An emotional, insightful read, I loved Woulff’s passion, the changes one makes to find “themselves,” and the belief that “the grass is greener on the other side.”
“Stainer” by Iolanthe Woulff is a flashback to times in the 70’s when young adults were looking to find themselves and be cool, yet still observe religious traditions.
Ben Steiner, a college undergraduate, lives in a communal house for Jewish students. He loves the atmosphere, customs, and peers who have the same beliefs as he does. Ben wants more from life however, and on his 21st birthday, he fights his strict religious beliefs and meets up with individuals who introduce him to the dark side of friendship, and how we often self-sabotage our religion and beliefs in order to be accepted by others.
Woulff does a fantastic job of describing life in the 70's as a young adult trying to come to terms with following cultural expectations of the Jewish community, wanting to be popular, the loss of virginity, and testing the laws of freedom. It is only human nature to want to spread your wings, test the waters, and sometimes push the envelope as one grows as a young adult.
Growing up in the 70's, Woulff's interpretation of the era was a trip down memory lane for me. The speech, fashion, and quest to be popular were among the common themes of some friends I knew in college, who jeopardized their own convictions. Not having much knowledge of LGBT issues during that time, I have since learned much. I believe that Woulff's writing on the issues of sabotage and being used by so called friends or groups still hold true today.
I loved the preface of the author's journey as a transgender writer. Starting out as "Nate" in 1978 and finally publishing this novel four decades later as a sixty-seven-year-old transgender female, Woulff provides great insight into how perspectives change. Remembering the issues and the avoidance of individuals who came out during that era, today’s society still has issues, but hopefully we have become more knowledgeable and accepting of people for who they are.
As an avid reader and book reviewer, it wasn't too many years ago I would not have even considered books about LGBT topics. Since then I have met many wonderful friends and authors who have shared their experiences on this subject. Sadly some of those individuals were not accepted by family or colleagues as their true person.
I highly recommend “Stainer” by Iolanthe Woulff. An emotional, insightful read, I loved Woulff’s passion, the changes one makes to find “themselves,” and the belief that “the grass is greener on the other side.”
May 19, 2019
This book was interesting to me because I work on a college campus, and I see kids like Steiner everyday who are just trying to figure out who they are. Steiner is an observant Jewish college student at an Ivy League college, and he is good looking enough to be able to have two girl friends at once but not mature enough to figure out what kind of relationship he wants. He tries drinking and partying, and finds that he is not that person but he can't make himself stop lying to the one girl he really loves. So this is a very Jewish story because it is about atonement, and how much difficult American Jews have dealing with their Jewish identity. My only issues with the book is that the model is supposed to be from San Antonio, but she is a "Southern belle" which is not Texas, and she sounds like she is from Georgia. It was a very stereotypical shallow portrait of a Southerner, and not a portrayal of a Texan at all.
August 29, 2017
Jewish Elite in 1970’s Ivy Leagues – WOW
This is a mundane story of Ivy League college life in the late 1970’s as experienced by our hero. This is both a story of Jewish identity and antisemitism. It is more about coming of age as a Jewish man . Of course, being the 70’s, being cool means plenty of smoking, drinking, illegal drugs and sexual experimentation. While a significant part of the book centers around our hero being a 21 yr old virgin, it is not handled in a believable manner.This is told with an elitist voice, not the gritty voice one would expect when discussing coming of age in the drug culture, maybe that is the Ivy League influence. At any rate, we can only accept the author’s word that he lived this life as it is so vastly different from what this reader experienced in the 1970’s. The characters seemed very superficial. The emotions and conversations seemed hollow. The plot was very predictable from chapter 4 on. The book came across both pretentious and preachy. I never became invested in either the characters or the story.
This is a mundane story of Ivy League college life in the late 1970’s as experienced by our hero. This is both a story of Jewish identity and antisemitism. It is more about coming of age as a Jewish man . Of course, being the 70’s, being cool means plenty of smoking, drinking, illegal drugs and sexual experimentation. While a significant part of the book centers around our hero being a 21 yr old virgin, it is not handled in a believable manner.This is told with an elitist voice, not the gritty voice one would expect when discussing coming of age in the drug culture, maybe that is the Ivy League influence. At any rate, we can only accept the author’s word that he lived this life as it is so vastly different from what this reader experienced in the 1970’s. The characters seemed very superficial. The emotions and conversations seemed hollow. The plot was very predictable from chapter 4 on. The book came across both pretentious and preachy. I never became invested in either the characters or the story.
August 26, 2017
"Stainer" is a really intelligent read. When I listened to the Audible edition I was struck by Woulff's lyrical prose. The villains are masterfully brought alive through this medium. For a visual reader, the Audible version of "Stainer" was devoured by this fan in 4 sittings. Brava!
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