Locklear Letters

by Michael Kun

The Locklear Letters is a farcical look at celebrity worship in today's society through the eyes of Sid Straw, an affable, if not boring, software salesman who tries to rekindle an acquaintanceship with his former college classmate turned Hollywood star Heather Locklear. His innocent letter requesting an autographed picture begins a bizarre turn of events that eventually costs him his job, foils his romantic intentions toward a co-worker, drains his finances, and generally ruins his life. Sid, a Don Quixote character with large blind spots regarding the fate of his one-sided correspondence with the movie star and his own behavior, cannot escape the wrath of lawyers, public relations bulldogs, angry bosses, and ex-girlfriends that drags his life down the tubes. Until he fights back.

Genres: Fiction

342 pages, Paperback

First published January 1, 2003

About the author

Michael Kun lives in Los Angeles, California. He practices law when he is not writing, or vice versa.

Reviews

[Lance · Rating 4 out of 5]

The next time you have a spare 38 minutes(1) I highly recommend spending it reading this book. It's funny. Truly. But the amount of whitespace on the page is mind boggling. Borrow it from the lib/friends or pick it up at the $2 sale rack at you favorite local, soon-to-be-defunct independent bookstore.

Update: I've upgraded my rating of this book to four stars. Mostly because Mike Kun is sort of nuts. Example, on September 1st, 2005, I emailed him stating that there was a broken link on his (very funny) site and that I was really enjoying You Poor Monster. He replied 11 minutes later. 11 minutes! I don't get that kind of response time when I'm planning a dinner date with my girl. Today I received a message from Michael on good reads. This perplexed me because I have no friends on good reads named Michael... I should have guessed(2).

Also, I'm upgrading my recommended purchase price from $2 to $6 ($10+ if you have more than $10,000 in savings).

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(1) There are some doubts as to the veracity of this claim. I'm standing firm.
(2) Note to Other Writers: if you write me a message, there is a good chance that I'll upgrade my rating of your book. I'm not suggesting you do this, I'm just putting it out there.

[Ian Allan · Rating 4 out of 5]

I thought it was fun. Creative approach. The entire book is just a series of short letters. It goes by really quick. It's a book you can read in one sitting (maybe 2 hours?). It's not easy to be funny. It's hard to make people laugh. But Kun is able to pull it off.

[Brandon Tietz · Rating 2 out of 5]

"The Locklear Letters" is a success in that this is a novel told exclusively through snail mail correspondence, and it's done in a way that carries along a plot, develops character, and moves things along at a breakneck pace. Unfortunately, I didn't really care for Sid Straw or his journey.

He endlessly pesters Heather Locklear. Yeah...THAT Heather Locklear. The one from Melrose Place. He bugs her so much that I, the reader, felt annoyed for her. Sid Straw is one of the few protags that I found myself rooting against...and bad things do happen to him: unlucky in love, in work, in legality. It's one of those stories where if it can go wrong, it does...to the point where it's suspect. So for about 300 pages things just get worse and worse for Sid only to take a turn for the better at the very end. Sid doesn't change; his luck does. He's still the same annoying asshole he was on page 1.

That's pretty much the ebb and flow: an annoying guy who has a penchant for bugging a celebrity loses everything and manages to recover (and then some). Again, I give kudos to Kun on being able to pull of an entire book composed of nothing but letters, but I was completely turned off by his main protag.

[J.L. · Rating 5 out of 5]

Only reason I didn't finish this book in one sitting was because I was laughing so hard my sides hurt and I needed a break.

[Sara · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is Lori's brother in law! Fun to read a book when you know the author.

[Danielle · Rating 3 out of 5]

A very quick and light read. There's really not a lot of depth to the story, told all through letters, but it was enjoyable. We watch the protagonist's life fall apart and reassemble, mostly through his unanswered letters to Heather Locklear. Cute.

[Valkyrie · Rating 4 out of 5]

I read “the Locklear Letters”, by Michael Kun in less than 24 hours! It’s told from letter exchanges from Sid Straw’s point of view. It follows a series of events that cost him his job, romantic interests, and even gets the CIA involved. If you want a fun read, this is it.

[Jacqui Liddell · Rating 3 out of 5]

Amusing, but carrying a real message of how persons can take things too literally!

[Sue Woodman · Rating 4 out of 5]

Very funny!!

[Elizabeth · Rating 4 out of 5]

The Locklear Letters by Michael Kun (pp. 341)

A man in a strange place in his life starts writing letters to Heather Locklear (yes, that one). The premise could be presented like a one-note Saturday Night Live sketch that goes on far too long, but instead succeeds on many levels.

Sid Straw, the sad, middle-aged software executive tells his story entirely in well-formed business letters. In today’s age of text and email, many of these letters could be a simple voice mail or email. The commitment and sadness of Kun’s main character is fascinating to watch through each correspondence, which must number in 200 plus.

Locklear appears to be replacement for “Dear Diary”. Kun takes the idea that sometimes you just need to believe you’re heard on the other end of a thought and is able to paint a fun yet meaningful and interesting portrait of a man. Sid Straw shares the complexity of his mundane life with Locklear, her lawyers, her agents, family and friends. The book results in beautifully paced character arc of a man who is denigrated by parts of his family, shunned by his college reunion committee, fired from work, and mistaken for someone else.

Watching Straw’s series of life-altering and unusual events surrounding his everyday life in this format is beautiful to watch. And like a juggler, you wonder how long Kun can keep up the format to reach his ending without dropping the ball and disappointing the audience.

In any other format, some of the repetition would be boring and annoying. But the format also provides an honesty and raw presentation of a man in isolation who is only seeking an average, ordinary life to consider himself successful.

For fans of comedy writing and structure, this book is definitely recommended. Also for fans of character pieces looking for a fast, easy read without all the melodrama that first person novels seems to be about these days.

[Camilla · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is very hard to review, cause the ending left me somewhat.. numb, for the lack of a better word...

I loved the book though.. I think..

I would just have loved it more if it didnt have a happy ending..

Which makes me sound like a really evil person, I know, but let me try to explain..

This is a book written through letters (which automatically gets a "Hell yeah!" from me) from Sid Straw to his college "friend" Heather Locklear.. Yes, the Melrose Place Heather Locklear.. And letters and notes to many others after that.. At first you get the impression that Sid could be some kind of stalker, and the more you know about him the more you want to know.. What is his deal exactly? Can anybody really be that... umm... weird? The things he does! The things that happen! Jesus.. But its so. freaking. funny! The more shit he got into the more I laughed and the crazier it got the more I laughed.. Seriously. I was LOL'ing for real..

Thats where the "numb" comes in.. Cause this was all about Sid being weird and getting into trouble, and I wanted that. I loved that. So when it all began to tie into a perfect happily ever after ending it lost some of its appeal.. Which sucks, cause I really, really liked it.. I loved it.. Just not the ending..

So I can only give it 4 stars..

But thats not that bad, is it?

Eat wheaties!


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Edit after reviewing..

Had I known that this was not the only book about Sid I would probably have given it 5 stars and a completely different review.. But I didnt at the time of reading and reviewing. Sid pops up again in Everybody Says Hello by the same author, and in my world that is a sequel to this book. Just an FYI..

[Kristopher · Rating 4 out of 5]

I feel as if I should have read this prior to reading _Everybody Says Hello_ . It follows our hero Sid as he continuously makes seat-of-his-pants decisions and never seems to learn from the mistakes he continually makes. Everything that can go wrong, does, and in the most insane way possible, only to be exacerbated by his unchecked responses. The whole time Sid keeps sending letters off to Heather Locklear, who Sid claims he knew from college. This book is so well written that, even though I know that Sid actually does know Ms. Locklear (because of _Everybody_), I was convinced that he was making the whole thing up... There are moments of laugh-out-loud hilarity (honestly, I cracked up in the middle of a very quiet coffee house), and the book is a lot of fun. Written in the same style as _Everybody_, we see only Sid's side of things. It's a quick read, and well worth the time. Another really fun book.

[Beck · Rating 5 out of 5]

I read this several years ago and it is still one of my favorite funny books of all time. Yes, it's a short read, but some of the protagonist's letters are so humorous, I found myself making sounds unbecoming of a lady. Part of the humor is the things left unsaid. We read only Sid Straw's letters and eventual replies to the unseen letters. Sid is not the most reliable or likable of narrators, but I like that in my books.

Like another reviewer, I too was moved to email Michael Kun in reference to another book of his, "Corrections to My Memoirs". http://www.pw.org/content/corrections...
The book was by turns funny, touching and absolutely heartbreaking, so I wrote a quick thank you note. Within a day I received a nice, if confused reply. (Much like Sid Straw, I was going through a rough time and I'm sure I sounded insane.)

[Lucy Hannigan · Rating 3 out of 5]

This is the 2nd book I have read by this author and it's a fun, easy read. Easy to pick up and easy to put down throughout the day because each "chapter" is a letter written by Sid. This book reminded me a lot of "Everybody Says Hello" in that the main character is a guy who through no direct fault-of-his-own, finds himself without a job, without a girlfriend and in a few legal binds. But regardless, Sid is a likable guy who knew Heather Locklear, the actress, in college. He corresponds with her regularly asking for favors and telling her all his troubles. She never responds--and there is a question as to whether or not his letters even get to her. All is well in the end...kind of.
Eat you Wheaties.

[Stefanie · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is a fun read. The protagonist is sometimes hard to understand, but overall lovable in the end. I especially like the author's sense of humor with regards to the human spirit. I've actually met the author and he is as funny off the page as he is on. I once compared his writing to having a tipsy glass of wine with an old friend in a book review for my old bookstore.

[peggy · Rating 4 out of 5]

An enjoyable read, lighthearted tale about SId Straw, a man who is a tad obsessive and very mannerly. The story takes place in the form of letters he writes to Heather Locklear (an old college friend) and various people in his life, such as his parents, girlfriends and Heather's attorney. It is a quick read and a pleasant way to spend a couple of hours.

[Dan · Rating 4 out of 5]

Very amusing and captivating quick read. A unique story-telling perspective that lets the reader perform their own character development just from reading between the lines of the letters. And an unexpected direction at the end to keep things interesting.

[Richard · Rating 4 out of 5]

Thoroughly enjoyed this book. It is almost painful to experience Sid Straw's life, but the whole experience of his woeful life is infused with such optimism and genuine warmth and you know you are in such capable hands that the ride is a genuine pleasure. Utterly loved it!

[Joy · Rating 5 out of 5]

I really enjoyed this book. Quite quirky being one sided but loved that you still knew what we taking place. Also the last few pages surprised me and I agree with some other reviewers the ending does just drop you. A very lighthearted book that I enjoyed.

[Sabrina · Rating 3 out of 5]

Read five pages and found it horribly irritating...and then couldn't put it down. I had to find out what was to happen. I think that says more about me than the book, but there you have it.

[Amy · Rating 3 out of 5]

Funny and fast.

[Angie · Rating 5 out of 5]

It took me about two hours to read this book, but I was laughing so hard I was crying the entire time.

[John · Rating 5 out of 5]

What can I say - this baby has become iconic (is that appropriate?). I pick it up at odd moments when in need of a chuckle. Live long and prosper, Sid Straw!

[Wendy Dale · Rating 5 out of 5]

Brillant in its simplicity. Very funny too!

[Scott · Rating 4 out of 5]

Cute. Quick, easy read. This was fun as a diversion while flying.

[Jennifer · Rating 4 out of 5]

Hilarious...frustratingly funny.

[Jason Donnelly · Rating 5 out of 5]

My number one recommended funny book out there.