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Maid in India: Stories of Inequality and Opportunity Inside Our Homes
We eat first, they later, often out of food portioned out for them; we live in the front, they in the back; we sit on chairs and they on the floor; we drink from glasses and ceramic plates and they from ones made of steel set aside for them; we call them by their names, and they address us by titles: sir/ma’am, sahib/memsahib...
Every year, thousands of poor, illiterate, unskilled women flock to Delhi from villages across the country to work as domestic help. This is how Fullin from Athgama in rural Jharkhand, Lovely from a tiny settlement in Malda, Golbanu bibi from Doparia, Mae from Kokrajhar and a Santhali girl from Annabiri, in the heart of Maoist country—find themselves in the nation’s most powerful city, working for its richest people. This is how tycoons and refugees, politicians and orphans—India’s one per cent and her 99 per cent—rub shoulders every day, under the same roof.
In the not so distant past, everyone’s place— whether maid, ayah or cook, sahib or memsahib— was well understood. There were clear rules for negotiating (and maintaining) the vast chasm between the two sides. Today, it’s a little different. There are housekeepers who are part of the middle class who ensure their children join white-collar India. There are teenage girls brought to the city by ‘aunts’ and ‘uncles’ to serve as ‘24-hour’ help, who find themselves virtually, and sometimes literally, caged. There are employers who wrestle with the guilt of spending more on an Italian meal in a fancy hotel than on those who clean their homes— and other employers who insist ‘these people’ are all thieves.
With in-depth reporting in the villages from where women make their way to upper-class homes in Delhi and Gurgaon, courtrooms where the worst allegations of abuse get an airing, and homes up and down the class ladder, Maid in India is an illuminating and sobering account of the complex and troubling relations between the help and those they serve.
Every year, thousands of poor, illiterate, unskilled women flock to Delhi from villages across the country to work as domestic help. This is how Fullin from Athgama in rural Jharkhand, Lovely from a tiny settlement in Malda, Golbanu bibi from Doparia, Mae from Kokrajhar and a Santhali girl from Annabiri, in the heart of Maoist country—find themselves in the nation’s most powerful city, working for its richest people. This is how tycoons and refugees, politicians and orphans—India’s one per cent and her 99 per cent—rub shoulders every day, under the same roof.
In the not so distant past, everyone’s place— whether maid, ayah or cook, sahib or memsahib— was well understood. There were clear rules for negotiating (and maintaining) the vast chasm between the two sides. Today, it’s a little different. There are housekeepers who are part of the middle class who ensure their children join white-collar India. There are teenage girls brought to the city by ‘aunts’ and ‘uncles’ to serve as ‘24-hour’ help, who find themselves virtually, and sometimes literally, caged. There are employers who wrestle with the guilt of spending more on an Italian meal in a fancy hotel than on those who clean their homes— and other employers who insist ‘these people’ are all thieves.
With in-depth reporting in the villages from where women make their way to upper-class homes in Delhi and Gurgaon, courtrooms where the worst allegations of abuse get an airing, and homes up and down the class ladder, Maid in India is an illuminating and sobering account of the complex and troubling relations between the help and those they serve.
330 pages, Kindle Edition
First published June 1, 2017
15 people are currently reading
443 people want to read
About the author
Tripti Lahiri
1 book1 followerDelhi-based journalist Tripti Lahiri was the founding editor of The Wall Street Journal India Real Time blog. In 2013, she was part of an award-winning Journal team that reported in-depth on the law enforcement and judicial response to crimes against women in India. She is also a winner of the Ramnath Goenka award for civic journalism.
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Displaying 1 - 19 of 19 reviews
December 12, 2018
This was interesting to a point, but I think it was really written for an Indian audience who might have identified with the stories of the employers more. I can't think the maids would ever have had the wherewithal or education to get hold of and read this book. Which really says it all, doesn't it?
The choices for the rural poor seem to be back-breaking physical work, starvation or go to the city and be a domestic worker. Even the best employers work their maids and cooks more than 10 hours a day and underpay them compared to non-domestic jobs. As in Saudi Arabia, Jordan and Lebanon , the girls are at risk of being enslaved - that is, not being paid for their work, being sexually exploited without their consent and having no one to complain to.
Women have no power in most households in India and there is a hierarchy. At the top is the matriarch, the wife of the oldest man. Next are the wives of the sons, then the wives of the daughters, then the daughters of the sons, etc. The youngest daughter is at the bottom of the pile and she and her mother will be expected to do all the heavy work, unless there is a maid. So to show their status, as they rise they will often, usually, treat the women beneath them with contempt and give them hard work, and possibly berate them or assault them for errors in their work.
India does not love or value women, neither Hindu nor Muslim. Women are so undervalued that after scans, the girl foetuses are often aborted. It is possible to get sterilized, but as one Muslim says in the book it is written in the Qu'ran that this is forbidden. (I don't know if that is true or not) and so a very poor woman who carries burdens on her head all day long for well beneath minimum wage may well end up with 8 or more children. And her greatest commodity is selling her daughters to a domestic employment agency from age 9 to be maids who will send their wages home.
I didn't read the entire book. It was repetitive in the stories of the poverty, the maids, the lack of respect by employer to domestic staff. The losing of moral standards - husband and wife couples, both professionals, who abhorred the way maids were treated but in the end, expediency wins out and they get a couple of maids and treat them as less than they are, they can't resist the freedom of not having to do menial work and confuse doing menial work with being menial.
The choices for the rural poor seem to be back-breaking physical work, starvation or go to the city and be a domestic worker. Even the best employers work their maids and cooks more than 10 hours a day and underpay them compared to non-domestic jobs. As in Saudi Arabia, Jordan and Lebanon , the girls are at risk of being enslaved - that is, not being paid for their work, being sexually exploited without their consent and having no one to complain to.
Women have no power in most households in India and there is a hierarchy. At the top is the matriarch, the wife of the oldest man. Next are the wives of the sons, then the wives of the daughters, then the daughters of the sons, etc. The youngest daughter is at the bottom of the pile and she and her mother will be expected to do all the heavy work, unless there is a maid. So to show their status, as they rise they will often, usually, treat the women beneath them with contempt and give them hard work, and possibly berate them or assault them for errors in their work.
India does not love or value women, neither Hindu nor Muslim. Women are so undervalued that after scans, the girl foetuses are often aborted. It is possible to get sterilized, but as one Muslim says in the book it is written in the Qu'ran that this is forbidden. (I don't know if that is true or not) and so a very poor woman who carries burdens on her head all day long for well beneath minimum wage may well end up with 8 or more children. And her greatest commodity is selling her daughters to a domestic employment agency from age 9 to be maids who will send their wages home.
I didn't read the entire book. It was repetitive in the stories of the poverty, the maids, the lack of respect by employer to domestic staff. The losing of moral standards - husband and wife couples, both professionals, who abhorred the way maids were treated but in the end, expediency wins out and they get a couple of maids and treat them as less than they are, they can't resist the freedom of not having to do menial work and confuse doing menial work with being menial.
October 9, 2018
Maid In India examines the people who live on one of modern India's most visible class fautlines - India's millions of domestic workers. This book tells their story, and explores the mechanics of this off the grid informal sector of employment. It examines employee-maid power dynamics, the dignity of labor, and the slippery ladder of upward mobiity. Cognizant of the cushioning of class, Lahiri manages to impress upon you the human impact being a maid has on the maids themselves.
Well researched with human stories adding multiple perspectives to the narrative, Maid In India book makes you see what it's like from the other side, with all the struggles, the bad bosses, the low pay, the dehumanizing class tensions, and the thirst for better living conditions. It also makes you appreciate how much indebted your own position in life is to your privilege, something that we all need to be reminded of.
Lahiri's detail-rich writing is incisive when the situation calls for it, and manages to shake you out of your own carefully crafted complacency, At the same time, there are a few too many ancedotes and it can be hard to keep track of all them, something that makes parts of the book drag on for a bit.
Well researched with human stories adding multiple perspectives to the narrative, Maid In India book makes you see what it's like from the other side, with all the struggles, the bad bosses, the low pay, the dehumanizing class tensions, and the thirst for better living conditions. It also makes you appreciate how much indebted your own position in life is to your privilege, something that we all need to be reminded of.
Lahiri's detail-rich writing is incisive when the situation calls for it, and manages to shake you out of your own carefully crafted complacency, At the same time, there are a few too many ancedotes and it can be hard to keep track of all them, something that makes parts of the book drag on for a bit.
December 3, 2018
Although the book's effort to point out the upper class's hypocrisy, ignorance and barbarity, along with the plight and struggle of those who work for them is commendable, I really wish its writing and editing (there are quite a few typos in it) would have been better. Especially because there are such few books talking about this subject. Had its sentence construction been less convoluted and its language simpler, I think, the book could have been accessible to a lot more people. Also, the way its put together is a bit haphazard. For example, a single story will be broken down and spread out across different sections of the books which have different themes - making it hard for one to get a good overview. I really didn't expect an Aleph book to be this poorly edited and proofread.
Despite all this, I would still recommend it because the subject is an important one and needs our attention.
Despite all this, I would still recommend it because the subject is an important one and needs our attention.
January 27, 2019
A much needed book about the class inequalities in the employer-domestic help dynamics. It addresses the privilege blindness and hypocrisies of the self-proclaimed progressive people.
I wish the stories were better organized. The book seems to be cut into disconnected parts. Hard to tell what the connecting theme of the stories in a chapter is.
I wish the stories were better organized. The book seems to be cut into disconnected parts. Hard to tell what the connecting theme of the stories in a chapter is.
November 11, 2022
I read this for a very specific reason due to curiosity about the people who lived in my host family's houses that had social roles with no analogue to anything I’ve experienced in the states. I never could figure out what/who exactly they were and tbh after finishing this I’m still not clear on some things.
This book focuses mostly on Delhi, and many of the interviewees seem to be part of Lahiri’s extended social network. The book is extremely anecdotal. It’s not that she didn’t do any research, obviously she did, but it’s very much about a super specific milieu. Many wealthy families in Delhi get girls from Jharkhand or Orissa to come work for them. There are a ton of issues with labor trafficking, underaged workers, workers not being paid, inability to return home, and physical/emotional/sexual abuse of maids.
The situations are never so simple. Lahiri tags along on several rescue missions done by nonprofits. Sometimes the maids do not want to return home, even if they aren’t getting paid and are essentially enslaved, because life in rural villages has its own challenges. Sometimes an employer may not give their help wages or a day off, but will pay for their children’s schooling and weddings. That arrangement seems ripe for abuse but is difficult to regulate. Sometimes nonprofits are actually labor trafficking outfits in disguise. Sometimes legit rescue operations get accused of being the traffickers. Of course, slow moving bureaucracy typically proves inadequate for solving these situations. It’s even more difficult when you live in an extremely remote village, do not speak Hindi or English, and have no money to find your child who went to the city to work 6 years ago and hasn’t called since.
Many of the employers had a sense of victimization due to the increasing demands and perceived laziness of maids who want pesky things such as “a day off” “not get beaten” “a tea break” “to get paid at all”. “We [the employers] should unite & fight against them [the maids]” (79). Typical “no one wants to work anymore!” style of complaining just because people don’t want to work for FREE. No one has LOYALTY because they’ll just go to someone who pays more! This seemed laughable to me, and totally insane, but I had to remind myself that every other week we have people on twitter making complaints that their instacart servants aren’t good at their jobs.
There was one anecdote about a “minimalist” couple who had a total of 10 servants. In theory they had so much free time because they never had to cook, clean, care for children, drive, or whatever else it was that the servants did. But the husband said he was so stressed out because he spent all his time managing the 10 servants! What is the point!!
I’m not the audience for this book. Maids are definitely not the audience for this book. The book is aimed at other members of Lahiri’s cohort, namely wealthy Indians who have servants but are also left leaning and consider themselves progressive. Lahiri interviews a woman who states that “class warfare needs to take place between members of the same class. People like us won’t change their behaviour unless they’re likely to lose face in front of another member of their own social class”. I get where she’s coming from, but the problem with a shame based model is that by nature the sites of these abuses take place in private, in the home. This atomisation within homes and lack of regulation/oversight also means it would be difficult for maids to form some kind of trade union to advocate for their rights. Lahiri isn’t really offering solutions here beyond trying to get her fellow elites to feel guilty enough to treat their servants better. She isn’t asking them to stop employing them, because that’s one of few viable paths for an impoverished rural family to get a foothold into the middle class. At one point Lahiri tries to give her maid a raise, and the maid rejects it because she’s afraid people back home will be suspicious that she’s doing sex work.
I’ve never been to Delhi aside from the airport. I lived in Jharkhand, and the majority of places I’ve been to in India are the “supply” states in the northeast like West Bengal, Orissa, Bihar etc. I would have liked to know more about places other than Delhi, because the stories here generally fit a standard rural→ big city supply chain of labor trafficking. Of course one book can’t address the entire history of domestic labor in all of India. And many of the anecdotes provided did provide insight into hierarchy, intricate unspoken rules such as spatial politics of seating arrangements, and of course all the glaring problems with the domestic labor situation in India. I did learn some things that I was not able to make sense of as a 16 year old coming from a country where this is not the norm. The book itself is structured somewhat randomly, and it was difficult to remember who was who. I wish it had had a stronger thru-line, maybe focusing on only one or two narratives instead of so many stories about both employers, maids, people she knows, her own life, and crime stories from the news. I read Maid by Stephanie Land earlier this year, but the circumstances of a maid in India and a maid in the US are so vastly different that it’s barely even worth comparing.
This book focuses mostly on Delhi, and many of the interviewees seem to be part of Lahiri’s extended social network. The book is extremely anecdotal. It’s not that she didn’t do any research, obviously she did, but it’s very much about a super specific milieu. Many wealthy families in Delhi get girls from Jharkhand or Orissa to come work for them. There are a ton of issues with labor trafficking, underaged workers, workers not being paid, inability to return home, and physical/emotional/sexual abuse of maids.
The situations are never so simple. Lahiri tags along on several rescue missions done by nonprofits. Sometimes the maids do not want to return home, even if they aren’t getting paid and are essentially enslaved, because life in rural villages has its own challenges. Sometimes an employer may not give their help wages or a day off, but will pay for their children’s schooling and weddings. That arrangement seems ripe for abuse but is difficult to regulate. Sometimes nonprofits are actually labor trafficking outfits in disguise. Sometimes legit rescue operations get accused of being the traffickers. Of course, slow moving bureaucracy typically proves inadequate for solving these situations. It’s even more difficult when you live in an extremely remote village, do not speak Hindi or English, and have no money to find your child who went to the city to work 6 years ago and hasn’t called since.
Many of the employers had a sense of victimization due to the increasing demands and perceived laziness of maids who want pesky things such as “a day off” “not get beaten” “a tea break” “to get paid at all”. “We [the employers] should unite & fight against them [the maids]” (79). Typical “no one wants to work anymore!” style of complaining just because people don’t want to work for FREE. No one has LOYALTY because they’ll just go to someone who pays more! This seemed laughable to me, and totally insane, but I had to remind myself that every other week we have people on twitter making complaints that their instacart servants aren’t good at their jobs.
There was one anecdote about a “minimalist” couple who had a total of 10 servants. In theory they had so much free time because they never had to cook, clean, care for children, drive, or whatever else it was that the servants did. But the husband said he was so stressed out because he spent all his time managing the 10 servants! What is the point!!
I’m not the audience for this book. Maids are definitely not the audience for this book. The book is aimed at other members of Lahiri’s cohort, namely wealthy Indians who have servants but are also left leaning and consider themselves progressive. Lahiri interviews a woman who states that “class warfare needs to take place between members of the same class. People like us won’t change their behaviour unless they’re likely to lose face in front of another member of their own social class”. I get where she’s coming from, but the problem with a shame based model is that by nature the sites of these abuses take place in private, in the home. This atomisation within homes and lack of regulation/oversight also means it would be difficult for maids to form some kind of trade union to advocate for their rights. Lahiri isn’t really offering solutions here beyond trying to get her fellow elites to feel guilty enough to treat their servants better. She isn’t asking them to stop employing them, because that’s one of few viable paths for an impoverished rural family to get a foothold into the middle class. At one point Lahiri tries to give her maid a raise, and the maid rejects it because she’s afraid people back home will be suspicious that she’s doing sex work.
I’ve never been to Delhi aside from the airport. I lived in Jharkhand, and the majority of places I’ve been to in India are the “supply” states in the northeast like West Bengal, Orissa, Bihar etc. I would have liked to know more about places other than Delhi, because the stories here generally fit a standard rural→ big city supply chain of labor trafficking. Of course one book can’t address the entire history of domestic labor in all of India. And many of the anecdotes provided did provide insight into hierarchy, intricate unspoken rules such as spatial politics of seating arrangements, and of course all the glaring problems with the domestic labor situation in India. I did learn some things that I was not able to make sense of as a 16 year old coming from a country where this is not the norm. The book itself is structured somewhat randomly, and it was difficult to remember who was who. I wish it had had a stronger thru-line, maybe focusing on only one or two narratives instead of so many stories about both employers, maids, people she knows, her own life, and crime stories from the news. I read Maid by Stephanie Land earlier this year, but the circumstances of a maid in India and a maid in the US are so vastly different that it’s barely even worth comparing.
July 27, 2017
Interesting book about an often overlooked (because it becomes to seems so "natural") area of life. More like several long feature magazine articles weaved together than single book with an agenda and a point to make (which is fine).
The organization of the book, however, was a little confusing.
The organization of the book, however, was a little confusing.
June 2, 2020
A nuanced, well-researched book on an extremely important topic. Contrary to other reviews, I actually enjoyed the layout of the book and its focus on stories and anecdotes. If you're living in India and are employing any type of staff, you need to read this book.
October 26, 2021
First of all, this book needed an editor.
Second of all, this book needed another editor.
Finally, this book should’ve been named “Maid in Delhi” - there’s literally zero representation of the lives of domestic workers from any of the other cities in the country.
I was really pumped about reading this one, the blurb and the Kindle sample were both promising. Unfortunately the final product did not impress me much.
Riddled with multiple typos, grammatical errors (pet peeve #1) and long rambling sentences (pet peeve #2) with chapters within chapters that really don’t segue very well into the conclusion, I felt my attention drifting away at many points.
There are a couple of good profiles of maid brokers and nannies, but that’s it.
Would have probably liked it more if it was cut down to 75% of its current length.
Second of all, this book needed another editor.
Finally, this book should’ve been named “Maid in Delhi” - there’s literally zero representation of the lives of domestic workers from any of the other cities in the country.
I was really pumped about reading this one, the blurb and the Kindle sample were both promising. Unfortunately the final product did not impress me much.
Riddled with multiple typos, grammatical errors (pet peeve #1) and long rambling sentences (pet peeve #2) with chapters within chapters that really don’t segue very well into the conclusion, I felt my attention drifting away at many points.
There are a couple of good profiles of maid brokers and nannies, but that’s it.
Would have probably liked it more if it was cut down to 75% of its current length.
January 20, 2018
Very cut-and-dry and boring. Rwad till 16%, but the structure of the book didn't fly with me— of having a separate chapter of each pawn in the game: the maid, the madam, the sahib, etc.
She'd done lots of reporting but the writing itself is not very good. Lots of places it's like she is not clear on what she wants to say, or hints at something but doesn't expant or say it clearly because she either does not want to take sides on a social issue; or hasn't formed her views clearly yet.
Not worth the time, even though this is probably the only contemporary book on this subject. Wished it was easier to read, in terms of writing style, and structure.
She'd done lots of reporting but the writing itself is not very good. Lots of places it's like she is not clear on what she wants to say, or hints at something but doesn't expant or say it clearly because she either does not want to take sides on a social issue; or hasn't formed her views clearly yet.
Not worth the time, even though this is probably the only contemporary book on this subject. Wished it was easier to read, in terms of writing style, and structure.
January 26, 2018
The book started on an interesting note bringing to light the discrepancies between India's social classes, perceived or otherwise, and went on to build on these with real life stories and incidents.
However, halfway into the book, you tend to forget the purpose of it as it starts feeling increasingly like an amalgamation of random stories that follow the expected routine of good employer- deceiving maid or bad employer- oppressed maid. Post that it felt like a drag somehow trying to reach the finishing line aka back cover with no real way of knowing what and if I'm going to learn anything new by making the milestone!
Don't think you'd miss much by skipping this altogether..
However, halfway into the book, you tend to forget the purpose of it as it starts feeling increasingly like an amalgamation of random stories that follow the expected routine of good employer- deceiving maid or bad employer- oppressed maid. Post that it felt like a drag somehow trying to reach the finishing line aka back cover with no real way of knowing what and if I'm going to learn anything new by making the milestone!
Don't think you'd miss much by skipping this altogether..
December 17, 2021
The book started well and the author has researched the topic well. It's about the househellp in urban India, the changes in their social and economic status and their interactions with the employers.
Based mainly in Delhi NCR region, the author explores the incoming workers'roots in Jharkhand, Bihar, chhattisgarh, Bengal up and MP.
The true incidents narrated are good in parts but are too stretched and towards the end become a painful process to read.
There are some simple editorial errors like member parliament is repeatedly written as minister parliament.
An average read but with some great statistics about the wages and demographics.
Based mainly in Delhi NCR region, the author explores the incoming workers'roots in Jharkhand, Bihar, chhattisgarh, Bengal up and MP.
The true incidents narrated are good in parts but are too stretched and towards the end become a painful process to read.
There are some simple editorial errors like member parliament is repeatedly written as minister parliament.
An average read but with some great statistics about the wages and demographics.
December 3, 2021
This is a very well researched book which highlights the class disparity, ignorance and the ever widening gap between classes across different ladders. Very commendable efforts from the author who has tried to give a glimpse of the life and struggles of domestic workers employed by people from middle class to lutyens.
But the research is limited to Delhi, Noida and Gurgaon so will not throw light on other metro cities. And also I agree with other readers here on the editing, some things are explained in overly complicated way than was needed but nevertheless a good book.
But the research is limited to Delhi, Noida and Gurgaon so will not throw light on other metro cities. And also I agree with other readers here on the editing, some things are explained in overly complicated way than was needed but nevertheless a good book.
November 22, 2022
This book sheds light and truth into domestic labour in India. There's all sorts of stories included, those that are rich, and those that have nothing. A con is that it really focuses on North India, there's barely any information on South India - from Maharashtra down South to Kerala and Tamil Nadu.
October 1, 2018
Made a good start but soon after its just drifted into too many interviews and stories and lost the main focus of this book. Could have been better, Maid in India seems only maids working for upper middle classes of Delhi ignoring the other regions and sociological angles. Disappointed !!
November 24, 2018
Purest form of stretching a concept to a humongous form of boring. Simple stories transformed into a complex book with even more complicated writing. Haphazard chapters talking about the same characters that you seem to lose a track of. Disappointing.
June 29, 2020
3.5 stars.
Other people who are not as interested in all-things-India may not think this book is as fascinating as I did, but reading about class, status, race and other inequalities that exist in other countries was especially relevant today.
Other people who are not as interested in all-things-India may not think this book is as fascinating as I did, but reading about class, status, race and other inequalities that exist in other countries was especially relevant today.
April 4, 2019
Very insightful way of looking at the issues of labour and caste within urban India.
October 16, 2019
Unique read discussing the economics of class disparity with very well tailored anecdotes.
August 6, 2018
A fascinating and very readable and well-researched journalistic tour of class and inequality in India which focuses on household servants. Through balanced interviews the author tells the stories of individual servants and the people who employ them as well as of maid agencies and NGOs responsible for rescuing servants from bad situations. A few of the stories are horrific but for the most part it's a less flashy but very eye-opening look at employer hypocrisy and stagnation, with an occasional levening of stories of servants who have managed to raise their family's station through the contacts and income gained through their work. Well worth a read for anybody interested in India, or in the wider story of domestic service.
Displaying 1 - 19 of 19 reviews