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Antisocial
A single stroke can change your world.
Xander Fairchild can’t stand people in general and frat boys in particular, so when he’s forced to spend his summer working on his senior project with Skylar Stone, a silver-tongued Delta Sig with a trust fund who wants to make Xander over into a shiny new image, Xander is determined to resist. He came to idyllic, Japanese culture-soaked Benten college to hide and make manga, not to be transformed into a corporate clone in the eleventh hour.
Skylar’s life has been laid out for him since before he was born, but all it takes is one look at Xander’s artwork, and the veneer around him begins to crack. Xander himself does plenty of damage too. There’s something about the antisocial artist’s refusal to yield that forces Skylar to acknowledge how much his own orchestrated future is killing him slowly…as is the truth about his gray-spectrum sexuality, which he hasn’t dared to speak aloud, even to himself.
Through a summer of art and friendship, Xander and Skylar learn more about each other, themselves, and their feelings for one another. But as their senior year begins, they must decide if they will part ways and return to the dull futures they had planned, or if they will take a risk and leap into a brightly colored future—together.
Xander Fairchild can’t stand people in general and frat boys in particular, so when he’s forced to spend his summer working on his senior project with Skylar Stone, a silver-tongued Delta Sig with a trust fund who wants to make Xander over into a shiny new image, Xander is determined to resist. He came to idyllic, Japanese culture-soaked Benten college to hide and make manga, not to be transformed into a corporate clone in the eleventh hour.
Skylar’s life has been laid out for him since before he was born, but all it takes is one look at Xander’s artwork, and the veneer around him begins to crack. Xander himself does plenty of damage too. There’s something about the antisocial artist’s refusal to yield that forces Skylar to acknowledge how much his own orchestrated future is killing him slowly…as is the truth about his gray-spectrum sexuality, which he hasn’t dared to speak aloud, even to himself.
Through a summer of art and friendship, Xander and Skylar learn more about each other, themselves, and their feelings for one another. But as their senior year begins, they must decide if they will part ways and return to the dull futures they had planned, or if they will take a risk and leap into a brightly colored future—together.
460 pages, Kindle Edition
First published August 8, 2017
66 people are currently reading
1448 people want to read
About the author
Heidi Cullinan
50 books2,875 followersAuthor of over thirty novels, Midwest-native Heidi Cullinan writes positive-outcome romances for LGBT characters struggling against insurmountable odds because they believe there’s no such thing as too much happy ever after. Heidi’s books have been recommended by Library Journal, USA Today, RT Magazine, and Publishers Weekly. When Heidi isn’t writing, they enjoy gaming, reading manga, manhua, and danmei, playing with cats, and watching too much anime.
Heidi goes by Jun when being spoken to in person or online, and Jun’s pronouns are they/them.
Heidi goes by Jun when being spoken to in person or online, and Jun’s pronouns are they/them.
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 261 reviews
September 25, 2017
A copy was provided by the publisher through Netgalley in exchange for an honest review
I do not recommend this book to ace spectrum readers. I discuss why, at length, in my review.
This story contains some classic aspects of NA: college setting, main characters coming to terms with identity, lots of angst, struggles with family and carving out their own path. It has a chosen family aspect, complete with former professor mentor/mother figure. One of the romantic leads is a grumpy loner artist, and it spends a lot of time on his artistic process, gives lots of details to sink into around that. Cullinan has an engaging writing style, includes lots of details.
All of that might be enjoyable to me as a reader, were it not for two central aspects of the story that I found troubling and harmful, which unfortunately seep into pretty much every part of the story.
The first is the way the story engages with Japanese culture and religion (specifically Shinto). In my read, it goes beyond cultural appropriation into what feels like fetishization. There are no Japanese or Japanese American characters in the story. There is one absent character who was Japanese American, but he is dead; he was the husband of the mother figure in the story. The mother figure is a former professor and one of the people who “teaches” the other characters about Japan and Japanese culture, often by quoting her dead husband.
Every aspect of the story, every intense moment, every growth arc and realization in the story wraps around this intense fascination with and objectification of Japanese culture and religion. It’s deeply embedded in the narrative, from the made up town name to the imagined history of the college where it’s set, from the art the MC does to the way the romance arc is shaped, from the moments of epiphany to the culminating travel to Japan. These white men openly take and change aspects of culture and Shinto religious practices for their own, have mystical Shinto-ish religious experiences that impact their choices, go to Japanese restaurants when they are upset, make romantic bento boxes, think of their romance in anime story arcs. It’s inescapable and creates this handwavy framework for the story, where the way these white MC’s problems are solved is through objectifying and appropriating (often pseudo) Japanese culture, and religion. It means that the characters don’t actually have to do the work themselves of figuring out what they want or need, they can just have a mystical Japanese religious experience to show the way, or figure it out based on what they know of Japanese culture. In short, this is lazy storytelling, on top of being deeply problematic.
There are other aspects of this kind of lazy storytelling; token disabled and POC secondary characters being the first that comes to mind. I especially disliked the way the disabled token character got “better” and didn’t bring her mobility devices on a hiking trip in Japan, and the way the Black character of course explained at length about how many scholarships he got for college and how it was all because of Obama. There are other lazy handwavy moments, too. Both MCs get but this is never presented as an actual issue, or something we even need to know how it gets resolved. Two different troubled family relationships are magically repaired despite the fundamental issues in them not being discussed or worked on. A core issue in the artist MC’s arc around his art is just never resolved at all. A non-binary character is forced to go to a binary gendered bathhouse and it’s presented as a joke and then never resolved, just handwaved away and never mentioned again. (This moment with the bathhouse is completely unnecessary to the plot, by the way. It is clearly only tossed in to make this "joke". And it's near the end, which I found very difficult as a non-binary reader, as it caught me by surprise.)
All of the things I mentioned so far are troubling, and were difficult to read. For me, though, the hardest thing was the ace spectrum representation. Here is a review by an ace spectrum reviewer, and here is another review by an ace spectrum reviewer. I will add links to more if I find them. This book centers Skylar’s exploration of gray sexuality and coming out process around being gray ace.
I am sharing my perspective as someone who you’d think would generally be a core audience for a book like this: a queer person questioning whether I might be on the ace spectrum (specifically questioning whether I might be gray ace or demisexual). I found this representation of asexuality to be deeply harmful to me, as an ace spec questioning reader. It basically told me that my only hope, if I am gray ace, is to get rescued and accepted by an allosexual romantic partner, but that such acceptance and rescue are a rare miracle.
This book is pretty clearly written for an allosexual audience. Its cousin would be one of the trans acceptance narratives discussed in this post: http://www.gayya.org/2015/09/the-acce.... In general, Skylar is presented as someone with internalized self-loathing around his asexuality, who slowly comes to accept himself (through the love of a good man). Xander, the allosexual love interest, is presented as someone who literally has some kind of ace spidey sense in the form of an internal voice telling him that he shouldn’t try to kiss Skylar, but that he’s not wrong that Skylar is into him. Once they begin dating, Xander is presented as this miracle for accepting Skylar’s boundaries, not pressuring him around sex, and saying that he doesn't feel that there is anything missing from their relationship. I found this framework deeply troubling and harmful.
Skylar comes out to Xander in a deeply pressured moment and then vomits afterwards, and Xander then of course, rescues him. In general, Xander (and other allosexual characters, esp his best friend Unc) are framed as rescuers for Skylar, around all sorts of things, including allonormativity and sexual pressure from his fraternity. Skylar is in a fraternity where he’s often bombarded with sexual pressure that makes him feel sick. There is a notable hazing scene that was full of sexual coercion and really horrible to read, where he basically gets rescued from the sexual coercion by Xander and Unc.
Skylar’s gray ace identity is framed through these intense contrasts that set Xander up as rescuer: Xander’s acceptance of his boundaries vs experiences of sexual coercion and pressure. For example, Skylar feels pressured and obligated to do a form of sex work in order to please his father, that’s all about passing as allosexual and going on fake dates with girls who then pressure him sexually, in order to gather information his father wants. He also feels like he has to flirt with his tutor so she won’t tell his father how badly he is doing. Skylar is caught in this maze of passing that’s full of coercion and pressure, and Xander creates a safe accepting space where he gets to be himself, rescues him from it. I found the inclusion of all this intense pressure and coercion very harmful to read; it often felt gratuitous, like it was there to frame Skylar as trapped, helpless and a victim. (It was also presented in a way that was deeply anti sex work, which was hard to read.)
There is an attempt to offer Skylar some support in the presence of an aroace secondary character, Zelda, who is also non-binary. I had high hopes for the inclusion of another ace spec character, but it didn’t do what I was hoping it would to help the story (or Skylar). I did like that Zelda was so openly ok with being aroace (in contrast to Skylars fear and self-loathing) and that they are so critical of allonormativity. It gets lost, though, in the fact that they are basically critical of everything, and other characters seem to pat them on the head and not really listen, treating their politics more like grumpiness they feel affectionate about. There is one scene where Skylar talks to Zelda about ace stuff, and it is very infodumpy. (Though I did like the moment when Zelda sets a boundary around talking about sex.) I dislike infodumps of this sort; it sets Zelda up as an object more than a person; they are the one who will inform the reader, and Skylar, the truth of his identity. And yet strangely, the infodump offers more confusion than clarity to the reader, I think. In particular, I wasn’t sure that there was a clear understanding of the split attraction model, which feels like something a gray ace romance should really be clear on. So, it was an infodump that…didn’t really serve its purpose. Zelda promises to connect Skylar with other gray aces at the end of the conversation, which felt like it could be this great thing…and then it never comes up again in the story. (There are a bunch of dropped threads in the story, so it’s not that surprising, but this one really didn’t work for me.) Basically, Zelda is there as a stand in for ace community support for Skylar, but he doesn’t actually get to be in ace community or really connect to other ace spec folks. We never even really see him connect with Zelda much after that one scene.
There is a queer hating bullying background story for one of the MCs. Some aspects of it worked for me: there aren’t a lot of details about the trauma, and it’s clearly presented as traumatic and still impacting his life. There are two things that I found troubling about it. The love interest “discovers” it through some rather intense internet research into his background when they are still strangers, and never tells him that he already knew, just waits for a longish while and asks him about it. The second thing is that his love interest comes up with this plan to help him establish a safe internet presence, as a cyberbullying survivor, a plan that is basically about remaking him, and then when it’s shot down (as it should be), doesn’t actually do much to resolve this open question of his social media presence and internet safety. It just kind of gets dropped from the story. Yet another dropped thread. Basically, the bullying is included as this plot device to get the characters together, and doesn’t get the kind of narrative attention it needs.
Trigger Warnings:
I do not recommend this book to ace spectrum readers. I discuss why, at length, in my review.
This story contains some classic aspects of NA: college setting, main characters coming to terms with identity, lots of angst, struggles with family and carving out their own path. It has a chosen family aspect, complete with former professor mentor/mother figure. One of the romantic leads is a grumpy loner artist, and it spends a lot of time on his artistic process, gives lots of details to sink into around that. Cullinan has an engaging writing style, includes lots of details.
All of that might be enjoyable to me as a reader, were it not for two central aspects of the story that I found troubling and harmful, which unfortunately seep into pretty much every part of the story.
The first is the way the story engages with Japanese culture and religion (specifically Shinto). In my read, it goes beyond cultural appropriation into what feels like fetishization. There are no Japanese or Japanese American characters in the story. There is one absent character who was Japanese American, but he is dead; he was the husband of the mother figure in the story. The mother figure is a former professor and one of the people who “teaches” the other characters about Japan and Japanese culture, often by quoting her dead husband.
Every aspect of the story, every intense moment, every growth arc and realization in the story wraps around this intense fascination with and objectification of Japanese culture and religion. It’s deeply embedded in the narrative, from the made up town name to the imagined history of the college where it’s set, from the art the MC does to the way the romance arc is shaped, from the moments of epiphany to the culminating travel to Japan. These white men openly take and change aspects of culture and Shinto religious practices for their own, have mystical Shinto-ish religious experiences that impact their choices, go to Japanese restaurants when they are upset, make romantic bento boxes, think of their romance in anime story arcs. It’s inescapable and creates this handwavy framework for the story, where the way these white MC’s problems are solved is through objectifying and appropriating (often pseudo) Japanese culture, and religion. It means that the characters don’t actually have to do the work themselves of figuring out what they want or need, they can just have a mystical Japanese religious experience to show the way, or figure it out based on what they know of Japanese culture. In short, this is lazy storytelling, on top of being deeply problematic.
There are other aspects of this kind of lazy storytelling; token disabled and POC secondary characters being the first that comes to mind. I especially disliked the way the disabled token character got “better” and didn’t bring her mobility devices on a hiking trip in Japan, and the way the Black character of course explained at length about how many scholarships he got for college and how it was all because of Obama. There are other lazy handwavy moments, too. Both MCs get but this is never presented as an actual issue, or something we even need to know how it gets resolved. Two different troubled family relationships are magically repaired despite the fundamental issues in them not being discussed or worked on. A core issue in the artist MC’s arc around his art is just never resolved at all. A non-binary character is forced to go to a binary gendered bathhouse and it’s presented as a joke and then never resolved, just handwaved away and never mentioned again. (This moment with the bathhouse is completely unnecessary to the plot, by the way. It is clearly only tossed in to make this "joke". And it's near the end, which I found very difficult as a non-binary reader, as it caught me by surprise.)
All of the things I mentioned so far are troubling, and were difficult to read. For me, though, the hardest thing was the ace spectrum representation. Here is a review by an ace spectrum reviewer, and here is another review by an ace spectrum reviewer. I will add links to more if I find them. This book centers Skylar’s exploration of gray sexuality and coming out process around being gray ace.
I am sharing my perspective as someone who you’d think would generally be a core audience for a book like this: a queer person questioning whether I might be on the ace spectrum (specifically questioning whether I might be gray ace or demisexual). I found this representation of asexuality to be deeply harmful to me, as an ace spec questioning reader. It basically told me that my only hope, if I am gray ace, is to get rescued and accepted by an allosexual romantic partner, but that such acceptance and rescue are a rare miracle.
This book is pretty clearly written for an allosexual audience. Its cousin would be one of the trans acceptance narratives discussed in this post: http://www.gayya.org/2015/09/the-acce.... In general, Skylar is presented as someone with internalized self-loathing around his asexuality, who slowly comes to accept himself (through the love of a good man). Xander, the allosexual love interest, is presented as someone who literally has some kind of ace spidey sense in the form of an internal voice telling him that he shouldn’t try to kiss Skylar, but that he’s not wrong that Skylar is into him. Once they begin dating, Xander is presented as this miracle for accepting Skylar’s boundaries, not pressuring him around sex, and saying that he doesn't feel that there is anything missing from their relationship. I found this framework deeply troubling and harmful.
Skylar comes out to Xander in a deeply pressured moment and then vomits afterwards, and Xander then of course, rescues him. In general, Xander (and other allosexual characters, esp his best friend Unc) are framed as rescuers for Skylar, around all sorts of things, including allonormativity and sexual pressure from his fraternity. Skylar is in a fraternity where he’s often bombarded with sexual pressure that makes him feel sick. There is a notable hazing scene that was full of sexual coercion and really horrible to read, where he basically gets rescued from the sexual coercion by Xander and Unc.
Skylar’s gray ace identity is framed through these intense contrasts that set Xander up as rescuer: Xander’s acceptance of his boundaries vs experiences of sexual coercion and pressure. For example, Skylar feels pressured and obligated to do a form of sex work in order to please his father, that’s all about passing as allosexual and going on fake dates with girls who then pressure him sexually, in order to gather information his father wants. He also feels like he has to flirt with his tutor so she won’t tell his father how badly he is doing. Skylar is caught in this maze of passing that’s full of coercion and pressure, and Xander creates a safe accepting space where he gets to be himself, rescues him from it. I found the inclusion of all this intense pressure and coercion very harmful to read; it often felt gratuitous, like it was there to frame Skylar as trapped, helpless and a victim. (It was also presented in a way that was deeply anti sex work, which was hard to read.)
There is an attempt to offer Skylar some support in the presence of an aroace secondary character, Zelda, who is also non-binary. I had high hopes for the inclusion of another ace spec character, but it didn’t do what I was hoping it would to help the story (or Skylar). I did like that Zelda was so openly ok with being aroace (in contrast to Skylars fear and self-loathing) and that they are so critical of allonormativity. It gets lost, though, in the fact that they are basically critical of everything, and other characters seem to pat them on the head and not really listen, treating their politics more like grumpiness they feel affectionate about. There is one scene where Skylar talks to Zelda about ace stuff, and it is very infodumpy. (Though I did like the moment when Zelda sets a boundary around talking about sex.) I dislike infodumps of this sort; it sets Zelda up as an object more than a person; they are the one who will inform the reader, and Skylar, the truth of his identity. And yet strangely, the infodump offers more confusion than clarity to the reader, I think. In particular, I wasn’t sure that there was a clear understanding of the split attraction model, which feels like something a gray ace romance should really be clear on. So, it was an infodump that…didn’t really serve its purpose. Zelda promises to connect Skylar with other gray aces at the end of the conversation, which felt like it could be this great thing…and then it never comes up again in the story. (There are a bunch of dropped threads in the story, so it’s not that surprising, but this one really didn’t work for me.) Basically, Zelda is there as a stand in for ace community support for Skylar, but he doesn’t actually get to be in ace community or really connect to other ace spec folks. We never even really see him connect with Zelda much after that one scene.
There is a queer hating bullying background story for one of the MCs. Some aspects of it worked for me: there aren’t a lot of details about the trauma, and it’s clearly presented as traumatic and still impacting his life. There are two things that I found troubling about it. The love interest “discovers” it through some rather intense internet research into his background when they are still strangers, and never tells him that he already knew, just waits for a longish while and asks him about it. The second thing is that his love interest comes up with this plan to help him establish a safe internet presence, as a cyberbullying survivor, a plan that is basically about remaking him, and then when it’s shot down (as it should be), doesn’t actually do much to resolve this open question of his social media presence and internet safety. It just kind of gets dropped from the story. Yet another dropped thread. Basically, the bullying is included as this plot device to get the characters together, and doesn’t get the kind of narrative attention it needs.
Trigger Warnings:
July 29, 2019
I received a galley from the publisher via NetGalley in exchange for an honest review.
** I'm still grossed out a year later wow.
I saw the cover that makes the guys look like manga characters & I ignored that sign. I should have known better. But I wanted to give this book a benefit of a doubt because there were so many positive reviews! So many people loved the romance! So I thought "hey, maybe that cover will make sense in the end". It doesn’t. It only gets worse from there.
It gets so bad I actually stopped reading at 65% because I just couldn’t take it anymore.
I probably would be able to overlook all the other flaws I found in this one, if it wasn’t for its biggest issue - the fetishisation of Japanese culture. The main point of this book, the thing that it couldn’t exist without at all, are indeed the references to Japanese culture. It’s everywhere: in the setting, in the way the characters interact, in the plotlines. It’s rooted in the book so deeply, it would fall apart without it.
So this is a story about students at a made-up college but the catch is - it’s a college founded by a Japanese culture "admirers". The town’s name is fictional - Takaketo - and don’t quote me on this but I’m pretty sure it doesn’t actually mean anything. It just vaguely sounds Japanese. There are hidden shrines on campus! The uni publishes a manga that our main character draws! (A manga drawn by an American, in America… So not actually a manga at all.) Both Xander & Skylar (the main characters) love manga and anime and have some interest in Japanese culture, but it’s extremely superficial.
And another kicker: there are no Japanese characters! The only one was a late husband of Xander’s landlady and she, an American, is the one "teaching" about the culture she so clearly knows everything about.
Listen, I say this from a perspective of a white woman who is interested in Japan, took classes on some aspects of its culture and history at uni, studied Japanese for a few years - and even from where I’m standing, this is just gross. They pick and choose from the culture as it pleases them. Xander & Skylar randomly speak Japanese in times of distress or as some kind of romantic gesture, but keep in mind: only Xander ever took any Japanese lessons. And they don’t have whole conversation in another language, no, they just tuck in a word or two at the end of their very English sentences. Or just use Japanese to say "I’m sorry" because what? It’s more meaningful that way? They also think of their relationship in terms of anime a lot, which is just honestly weird. It’s straight up fetishisation and even as someone with very little ties to Japan, it made me uncomfortable.
Listen, you wanna write a book appreciating Japanese culture? Make your main characters Japanese, set the whole thing in Japan, find literally any reason other than "it’s kinda cute". But making your character say things like "Arakawa-sensei"? Not the way. God, even if this was a Japanese book, sensei would be translated into English! Another country’s culture is not a prop to make your story more interesting! There are teens on the internet, first discovering anime, who behave this way & I can excuse them, based on their age, but an adult, a published author? A big fat no from me.
There’s also the fact of asexuality being one of the most important themes of the book. One of our main characters is a gray ace and the book is pretty much his journey to become comfortable with himself. It ticked me the wrong way a lot of the time, but personally I’m nowhere on the spectrum, so I’d rather not give opinions. There are a few reviews by actual members of the community so check those out instead!
What I will say though is that Xander hears this voice in his head. A voice that tells him how to handle Skylar, how to act around him and it’s always the opposite of what his desires and instinct tell him. Still, his friend Zelda actually calls this voice an instinct. What I would call it is some fucked up "ace superpower". Because of course Xander can’t be anything less than the knight in shining armor, accepting Skylar as he is, demanding nothing & basically being a gift from heaven. The only one on earth.
You worry that both main characters are white? Don’t fret! There is a chronically ill Latina who is in maybe 3 scenes & a poor Black guy who chose this uni because he saw Obama speak at campus. Two whole poc that are basically just names and a lousy story. Now doesn’t that make you feel better about the representation!
Onto the less important stuff!! If this was a fic, I wouldn’t have read more than a few paragraphs. You know how with fics you just know when the writing isn’t right for you? Well this was a case of that, but I kept thinking it’s a book so slightly different rules apply, maybe it will get better over time. It didn’t. The writing is just… not very good. All the descriptions are way too detailed - like, come on! I really don’t need to know he washed his bowl after eating instant ramen! - and they’re not written interestingly enough, aren’t funny or charming, or surprising enough that you can overlook this.
And it doesn’t get better with dialogues. If anything, it only get worse. Honestly, it feels like the author has never actually met a young person. They all speak in whole speeches and use words and phrases like "congruent" or "vastly different", or "wet dream". I mean. Seriously? They don’t act like 21-year-olds either. For the love of god, one of them admits he can’t look up manga translations online without getting a virus. And has a phone with a stylus! That he actually uses! Which brings me right to my next point.
Are you sure this book is set in 2017? Because there are references to the last presidential elections & we can’t draw any other conclusion. But then we have a smartphone with a stylus. And another character’s flip phone? Like where would he even get one?! Xander is also apparently named after Buffy’s Xander but he’s 21 years old and Buffy started airing in March of 1997 so unless this is set in the future… They also mention DeviantART which I’m pretty sure no one has used since like 2007 but okay. How hard is it to make some proper research?
This book is praised as a romance and yeah, those parts of the story are pretty okay-ish. The two main characters are well developed and I would actually really like them in a different book. One that isn’t gross and doesn’t make me wanna punch people.
** I'm still grossed out a year later wow.
I saw the cover that makes the guys look like manga characters & I ignored that sign. I should have known better. But I wanted to give this book a benefit of a doubt because there were so many positive reviews! So many people loved the romance! So I thought "hey, maybe that cover will make sense in the end". It doesn’t. It only gets worse from there.
It gets so bad I actually stopped reading at 65% because I just couldn’t take it anymore.
I probably would be able to overlook all the other flaws I found in this one, if it wasn’t for its biggest issue - the fetishisation of Japanese culture. The main point of this book, the thing that it couldn’t exist without at all, are indeed the references to Japanese culture. It’s everywhere: in the setting, in the way the characters interact, in the plotlines. It’s rooted in the book so deeply, it would fall apart without it.
So this is a story about students at a made-up college but the catch is - it’s a college founded by a Japanese culture "admirers". The town’s name is fictional - Takaketo - and don’t quote me on this but I’m pretty sure it doesn’t actually mean anything. It just vaguely sounds Japanese. There are hidden shrines on campus! The uni publishes a manga that our main character draws! (A manga drawn by an American, in America… So not actually a manga at all.) Both Xander & Skylar (the main characters) love manga and anime and have some interest in Japanese culture, but it’s extremely superficial.
And another kicker: there are no Japanese characters! The only one was a late husband of Xander’s landlady and she, an American, is the one "teaching" about the culture she so clearly knows everything about.
Listen, I say this from a perspective of a white woman who is interested in Japan, took classes on some aspects of its culture and history at uni, studied Japanese for a few years - and even from where I’m standing, this is just gross. They pick and choose from the culture as it pleases them. Xander & Skylar randomly speak Japanese in times of distress or as some kind of romantic gesture, but keep in mind: only Xander ever took any Japanese lessons. And they don’t have whole conversation in another language, no, they just tuck in a word or two at the end of their very English sentences. Or just use Japanese to say "I’m sorry" because what? It’s more meaningful that way? They also think of their relationship in terms of anime a lot, which is just honestly weird. It’s straight up fetishisation and even as someone with very little ties to Japan, it made me uncomfortable.
Listen, you wanna write a book appreciating Japanese culture? Make your main characters Japanese, set the whole thing in Japan, find literally any reason other than "it’s kinda cute". But making your character say things like "Arakawa-sensei"? Not the way. God, even if this was a Japanese book, sensei would be translated into English! Another country’s culture is not a prop to make your story more interesting! There are teens on the internet, first discovering anime, who behave this way & I can excuse them, based on their age, but an adult, a published author? A big fat no from me.
There’s also the fact of asexuality being one of the most important themes of the book. One of our main characters is a gray ace and the book is pretty much his journey to become comfortable with himself. It ticked me the wrong way a lot of the time, but personally I’m nowhere on the spectrum, so I’d rather not give opinions. There are a few reviews by actual members of the community so check those out instead!
What I will say though is that Xander hears this voice in his head. A voice that tells him how to handle Skylar, how to act around him and it’s always the opposite of what his desires and instinct tell him. Still, his friend Zelda actually calls this voice an instinct. What I would call it is some fucked up "ace superpower". Because of course Xander can’t be anything less than the knight in shining armor, accepting Skylar as he is, demanding nothing & basically being a gift from heaven. The only one on earth.
You worry that both main characters are white? Don’t fret! There is a chronically ill Latina who is in maybe 3 scenes & a poor Black guy who chose this uni because he saw Obama speak at campus. Two whole poc that are basically just names and a lousy story. Now doesn’t that make you feel better about the representation!
Onto the less important stuff!! If this was a fic, I wouldn’t have read more than a few paragraphs. You know how with fics you just know when the writing isn’t right for you? Well this was a case of that, but I kept thinking it’s a book so slightly different rules apply, maybe it will get better over time. It didn’t. The writing is just… not very good. All the descriptions are way too detailed - like, come on! I really don’t need to know he washed his bowl after eating instant ramen! - and they’re not written interestingly enough, aren’t funny or charming, or surprising enough that you can overlook this.
And it doesn’t get better with dialogues. If anything, it only get worse. Honestly, it feels like the author has never actually met a young person. They all speak in whole speeches and use words and phrases like "congruent" or "vastly different", or "wet dream". I mean. Seriously? They don’t act like 21-year-olds either. For the love of god, one of them admits he can’t look up manga translations online without getting a virus. And has a phone with a stylus! That he actually uses! Which brings me right to my next point.
Are you sure this book is set in 2017? Because there are references to the last presidential elections & we can’t draw any other conclusion. But then we have a smartphone with a stylus. And another character’s flip phone? Like where would he even get one?! Xander is also apparently named after Buffy’s Xander but he’s 21 years old and Buffy started airing in March of 1997 so unless this is set in the future… They also mention DeviantART which I’m pretty sure no one has used since like 2007 but okay. How hard is it to make some proper research?
This book is praised as a romance and yeah, those parts of the story are pretty okay-ish. The two main characters are well developed and I would actually really like them in a different book. One that isn’t gross and doesn’t make me wanna punch people.
August 31, 2017
ARC acquired through Netgalley.
This book, y'all. This book is absolutely awful.
When I first heard about Antisocial, I was excited. A m/m book with a gray-ace character that also had an aroace non-binary side character? It sounded wonderful. It's almost impossible to find m/m romance (or just romance in general) with ace characters, let alone a m/m romance with more than an ace character, with one of them being aro. If ace characters are rare in romance, arospec characters are freaking unicorns, and so are non-binary characters (aroace non-binary characters then!)
So yeah, I was excited.
But it all melted away when I read Xan's review of it. And Daniela's. And Annie's. The book I wanted so much to read was a mess when it came to Japanese culture and the ace rep and the nonbinary rep. At this point I had already got an ARC from Netgalley, so I threw my hopes out the window and braced myself to read the book just so I could write an accurate review of it. I was expecting something bad.
I got something awful.
The way this book portrays and treats Japanese culture is absolutely disgusting. I've never read something so blatant fetishizing. Antisocial is set in a fictional university called Benten that was funded by American "admirers" of Japanese culture. Just that would be iffy, but there is no Japanese or Japanese-American character in this story and all of the important/major characters are white. And what is worse, they are all weaboos. For real. I understand admiring & enjoying Japanese culture because I grew up watching anime and reading manga and even tried to learn Japanese at some point (I still kinda want to, one day) but there is a line between admiring something and fetishzing it and this book is absolutely fetishizing Japanese culture.
Some examples:
Skylar and Xander have absolutely no reason ever to speak Japanese. They only do it because they are both anime & manga fans that love the Japan of animes and mangas, so it’s somehow “meaningful” to them to say the most unnecessary shit in Japanese from time to time (at some point one calls the other “my sakura”, I kid you not). What’s worse, sometimes they speak Japanese to each other in kinda sensual and even sexual moments, again just because. Japanese language is an adornment for them, to use when they want to say something “special”.
Japanese language, culture and religion are used in this book just to further the main characters’ romance and development. Japan itself is portrayed as some kind of mystical land where both Xander and Skylar can find happiness (spoiler, but they actually finish the book by going to teach English in Japan) and where everything is cooler just because it’s Japanese. There is no substance to anything Japanese in this story. Everything is used in the most fetishzing, disgusting way possible.
And it’s not a small thing. Japanese culture & language are embedded in the premise of Antisocial. There is no way this book could exist without it and without exploiting it. In the first 20/30% or so I was like, “ok, this is bad, but I guess I can keep going” but it only got worse from there. The second half of the story mistreats Japanese culture so much it actually became painful to read. And like, the book tries to acknowledge how nonsensical the whole thing is. Keyword: tries.
The excerpt seems like a poor attempt at recognizing how weeaboo the only thing is, but it’s right in the beginning and the way the white main characters (one of whom is filthy rich) engage with Japanese culture is never challenged or questioned. It feels a lot like trying to save face.
“But Ren, what about the ace rep?” you might be asking and well, that’s complicated. I expected it to be awful and it was, but not as much as I thought it would be (small miracles, I guess?), partly because I related to some of it. I’m grayace myself, though I usually just say I’m ace. Though Skylar’s grayasexuality is nothing like mine, I related to some of his reactions. Puking after you kinda come out to someone? Sadly, something I probably would have done as well. It kinda reminded me of when my uni’s seniors made us freshmen (is that how both are called in English? Well) tell, half joking (my course is relatively queer-friendly), what our orientation was. I was at the back of the class and panicked because if they asked me, I wasn’t sure of how I would react, if I would say I was straight or risk coming out as aroace to ~50 students, most if not all of which had never heard about asexuality and aromanticism before. I would just puke on their feet, probably. Just like Skylar. So I fled.
So yeah, I understand what’s like to be nervous about coming out as ace (and aro) and I didn’t find any fault in how Skylar’s reaction to his coming out or to how he dealt with internalized acemisia. Everything else, though… Well, it was shitty.
First, the split attraction model. Now, some aces and aros and, well, people in general, don’t use it and that’s fine. But Skylar doesn’t even seem to know it exists, which is kinda weird for an acespec person who dug enough info on asexuality to know it was a thing. He never questions his romantic orientation, never gives a hint that for him romantic and sexual attraction are the same thing/that he doesn’t need or want the split attraction model, never explores his identity. Even Zelda, the aroace non-binary character, is a poor attempt at giving Skylar a community. He doesn’t have one. He doesn’t look for one. He doesn’t even think or say that he doesn’t need one. It’s like the ace community doesn’t exist in this book. And no, I’m not saying that he should have gone to ace meetings or whatever, but honestly? Most aces look for a community when we figure out that we ace because we spent our whole lives wondering what the hell was wrong. Skylar wondered the same, but since he had Xander, all was well.
Which brings us to the second problem with the ace rep in this book: Xander is the allo savior of this story.
Now, I’m all for allo characters who respect the boundaries of their ace partners (in fact, I want more of that in all genres), but Xander goes beyond that in Antisocial. He has the instinct of not trying to kiss Skylar (really?) and while Skylar is chest deep in his internalized acemisia he gets out of it because Xander loves him. That’s it.
Trying to explore his identity? Connecting with members of the ace community? Trying to work through his internalized acemisia? Trying to understand why it exists in the first place and why he has so much of it? Nah. Why, when you have a hot guy who loves you?
And this is my problem with the ace rep in Antisocial. It’s for allo readers who want an ace character who hates himself but gets better through the love of his hot boyfriend. It’s not for ace readers in the end. In a way, it’s own different kind of fetishzing.
Also, it’s kinda… bad that Xander thinks this at some point:
Because:
1. That's the kind of thinking that makes ace men hate themselves. See: Skylar.
2. That's freaking ridiculous to think when you KNOW some men are ace.
3. That's freaking ridiculous to think because even some men who are not ace don't look or only think about sex all the time.
4. Ace men are men. Why is the super accepting allo partner going on about how men just will look right before thinking that the MAN he has a crush on doesn't?
5. I know generalizations can work in some cases. This is not one of them.
The idea the all men think about sex all the time or will look at someone they find hot because they can’t help themselves is one of the reasons ace boys and men are so mistreated by literally everyone. Being a man and being sexual are deeply linked, and when you are one but not the other society will come for your head. But that’s bullshit. Being or not being sexual doesn’t make anyone less of a man and it’d be nice if we stopped spreading this idea everywhere, especially in a book about an ace man. Seriously.
I had no strong feelings about how Zelda, the non-binary character, was portrayed. It got a bit tiring that their anger/social justiceness (so to speak) was mostly only tolerated by everyone else. They felt a bit like a caricature, to be honest.
Now on to my petty complaint: Xander is an artist who strongly dislikes digital art because it “just doesn’t feel the same”. Early in the book he mentions that it feels weird to draw on a tablet while looking at the PC/laptop and I was like, “well display tablets exist?” because honestly. And well, way after a character shows him a display tablet and he is just awed. It was such a ridiculous thing to read. I mean, does the author really wants me to believe an artist who has been drawing for years knows about graphic tablets but not about display tablets? Right. Because that is believable.
In conclusion, Antisocial could have been a strong story that I could have loved. It’s my kind of book, being low on the sexual content and having characters that actually have conflicts that interest me. But since it’s full of fetishzing bullshit and shitty ace rep, I’m not here for it or for any of Heidi Cullinan’s books from now on. 1.0 star.
PS: Acemisia = acephobia = anti-ace bigotry.
PSS: I’m looking for reviews of this book by Japanese readers, Japanese-Americans and all descendants of Japanese included, to link in this review. If you’ve written one, please let me know in the comments! I would love to boost your review!
PSSS: I would recommend Blank Spaces by Cass Lennox, Empty Net by Avon Gale and Concourse by Santino Hassell as good m/m romance books with acespec characters. A warning, though: I haven't read Lennox's other books, but I've heard Finding Your Feet is transmisic.
This book, y'all. This book is absolutely awful.
When I first heard about Antisocial, I was excited. A m/m book with a gray-ace character that also had an aroace non-binary side character? It sounded wonderful. It's almost impossible to find m/m romance (or just romance in general) with ace characters, let alone a m/m romance with more than an ace character, with one of them being aro. If ace characters are rare in romance, arospec characters are freaking unicorns, and so are non-binary characters (aroace non-binary characters then!)
So yeah, I was excited.
But it all melted away when I read Xan's review of it. And Daniela's. And Annie's. The book I wanted so much to read was a mess when it came to Japanese culture and the ace rep and the nonbinary rep. At this point I had already got an ARC from Netgalley, so I threw my hopes out the window and braced myself to read the book just so I could write an accurate review of it. I was expecting something bad.
I got something awful.
The way this book portrays and treats Japanese culture is absolutely disgusting. I've never read something so blatant fetishizing. Antisocial is set in a fictional university called Benten that was funded by American "admirers" of Japanese culture. Just that would be iffy, but there is no Japanese or Japanese-American character in this story and all of the important/major characters are white. And what is worse, they are all weaboos. For real. I understand admiring & enjoying Japanese culture because I grew up watching anime and reading manga and even tried to learn Japanese at some point (I still kinda want to, one day) but there is a line between admiring something and fetishzing it and this book is absolutely fetishizing Japanese culture.
Some examples:
Something inside Xandder snapped - he could almost see it, and it was a tiny, red-hot rubber hand. "Hai. Take off your clothes, all of them, Skylar-san, onegaishimasu." When Skylar only stared at him, he clapped his hands twice. "Hayaku."
"I think I'd appreciate your skivvies." Skylar cleared his throat. "And...a sock for myself. Ku..Kud..."
"Kudasai."
"A sock, kudasai."
"Do you know what I wish?" Skylar held Xander's hand tight as he looked up at the falling leaves. "I wish we could stand like this in Japan, under real chery trees. Ones in bloom."
"We have real cherry trees in the United States, you know."
"The ones in Japan feel more real, somehow."
Xander smiled. "Then let's make it a vow. Someday we'll stand under cherry blossoms in Japan."
Skylar smiled back, and there was only weariness, no more shadows in his face now. "It's a promise."
Skylar and Xander have absolutely no reason ever to speak Japanese. They only do it because they are both anime & manga fans that love the Japan of animes and mangas, so it’s somehow “meaningful” to them to say the most unnecessary shit in Japanese from time to time (at some point one calls the other “my sakura”, I kid you not). What’s worse, sometimes they speak Japanese to each other in kinda sensual and even sexual moments, again just because. Japanese language is an adornment for them, to use when they want to say something “special”.
Japanese language, culture and religion are used in this book just to further the main characters’ romance and development. Japan itself is portrayed as some kind of mystical land where both Xander and Skylar can find happiness (spoiler, but they actually finish the book by going to teach English in Japan) and where everything is cooler just because it’s Japanese. There is no substance to anything Japanese in this story. Everything is used in the most fetishzing, disgusting way possible.
And it’s not a small thing. Japanese culture & language are embedded in the premise of Antisocial. There is no way this book could exist without it and without exploiting it. In the first 20/30% or so I was like, “ok, this is bad, but I guess I can keep going” but it only got worse from there. The second half of the story mistreats Japanese culture so much it actually became painful to read. And like, the book tries to acknowledge how nonsensical the whole thing is. Keyword: tries.
[...] but mostly the college was a bunch of rich white people, a handful of people of color, and an explosion of Japanese culture that made no sense when you looked at it from the outside.
The excerpt seems like a poor attempt at recognizing how weeaboo the only thing is, but it’s right in the beginning and the way the white main characters (one of whom is filthy rich) engage with Japanese culture is never challenged or questioned. It feels a lot like trying to save face.
“But Ren, what about the ace rep?” you might be asking and well, that’s complicated. I expected it to be awful and it was, but not as much as I thought it would be (small miracles, I guess?), partly because I related to some of it. I’m grayace myself, though I usually just say I’m ace. Though Skylar’s grayasexuality is nothing like mine, I related to some of his reactions. Puking after you kinda come out to someone? Sadly, something I probably would have done as well. It kinda reminded me of when my uni’s seniors made us freshmen (is that how both are called in English? Well) tell, half joking (my course is relatively queer-friendly), what our orientation was. I was at the back of the class and panicked because if they asked me, I wasn’t sure of how I would react, if I would say I was straight or risk coming out as aroace to ~50 students, most if not all of which had never heard about asexuality and aromanticism before. I would just puke on their feet, probably. Just like Skylar. So I fled.
So yeah, I understand what’s like to be nervous about coming out as ace (and aro) and I didn’t find any fault in how Skylar’s reaction to his coming out or to how he dealt with internalized acemisia. Everything else, though… Well, it was shitty.
First, the split attraction model. Now, some aces and aros and, well, people in general, don’t use it and that’s fine. But Skylar doesn’t even seem to know it exists, which is kinda weird for an acespec person who dug enough info on asexuality to know it was a thing. He never questions his romantic orientation, never gives a hint that for him romantic and sexual attraction are the same thing/that he doesn’t need or want the split attraction model, never explores his identity. Even Zelda, the aroace non-binary character, is a poor attempt at giving Skylar a community. He doesn’t have one. He doesn’t look for one. He doesn’t even think or say that he doesn’t need one. It’s like the ace community doesn’t exist in this book. And no, I’m not saying that he should have gone to ace meetings or whatever, but honestly? Most aces look for a community when we figure out that we ace because we spent our whole lives wondering what the hell was wrong. Skylar wondered the same, but since he had Xander, all was well.
Which brings us to the second problem with the ace rep in this book: Xander is the allo savior of this story.
Now, I’m all for allo characters who respect the boundaries of their ace partners (in fact, I want more of that in all genres), but Xander goes beyond that in Antisocial. He has the instinct of not trying to kiss Skylar (really?) and while Skylar is chest deep in his internalized acemisia he gets out of it because Xander loves him. That’s it.
Trying to explore his identity? Connecting with members of the ace community? Trying to work through his internalized acemisia? Trying to understand why it exists in the first place and why he has so much of it? Nah. Why, when you have a hot guy who loves you?
And this is my problem with the ace rep in Antisocial. It’s for allo readers who want an ace character who hates himself but gets better through the love of his hot boyfriend. It’s not for ace readers in the end. In a way, it’s own different kind of fetishzing.
Also, it’s kinda… bad that Xander thinks this at some point:
Man looked. Whether they were dating or not, looking for a partner or not - they looked. It wasn't cheating or offensive, or it wasn't intended to be. It simply was. Xander would lie in hot coals for one kiss from Skylar, one brush of his fingertips on his naked chest, but if the right guy walked by post-workout without a shirt, it would take willpower not to steal a glance and file images away for the spank bank.
Because:
1. That's the kind of thinking that makes ace men hate themselves. See: Skylar.
2. That's freaking ridiculous to think when you KNOW some men are ace.
3. That's freaking ridiculous to think because even some men who are not ace don't look or only think about sex all the time.
4. Ace men are men. Why is the super accepting allo partner going on about how men just will look right before thinking that the MAN he has a crush on doesn't?
5. I know generalizations can work in some cases. This is not one of them.
The idea the all men think about sex all the time or will look at someone they find hot because they can’t help themselves is one of the reasons ace boys and men are so mistreated by literally everyone. Being a man and being sexual are deeply linked, and when you are one but not the other society will come for your head. But that’s bullshit. Being or not being sexual doesn’t make anyone less of a man and it’d be nice if we stopped spreading this idea everywhere, especially in a book about an ace man. Seriously.
I had no strong feelings about how Zelda, the non-binary character, was portrayed. It got a bit tiring that their anger/social justiceness (so to speak) was mostly only tolerated by everyone else. They felt a bit like a caricature, to be honest.
Now on to my petty complaint: Xander is an artist who strongly dislikes digital art because it “just doesn’t feel the same”. Early in the book he mentions that it feels weird to draw on a tablet while looking at the PC/laptop and I was like, “well display tablets exist?” because honestly. And well, way after a character shows him a display tablet and he is just awed. It was such a ridiculous thing to read. I mean, does the author really wants me to believe an artist who has been drawing for years knows about graphic tablets but not about display tablets? Right. Because that is believable.
In conclusion, Antisocial could have been a strong story that I could have loved. It’s my kind of book, being low on the sexual content and having characters that actually have conflicts that interest me. But since it’s full of fetishzing bullshit and shitty ace rep, I’m not here for it or for any of Heidi Cullinan’s books from now on. 1.0 star.
PS: Acemisia = acephobia = anti-ace bigotry.
PSS: I’m looking for reviews of this book by Japanese readers, Japanese-Americans and all descendants of Japanese included, to link in this review. If you’ve written one, please let me know in the comments! I would love to boost your review!
PSSS: I would recommend Blank Spaces by Cass Lennox, Empty Net by Avon Gale and Concourse by Santino Hassell as good m/m romance books with acespec characters. A warning, though: I haven't read Lennox's other books, but I've heard Finding Your Feet is transmisic.
August 30, 2017
3 stars...
This was quite the long read. And it felt it.
It took me a minute to get into it and start enjoying it. Until I didn't.
The relationship between Skylar and Xavier was my favorite part of the book. They were very sweet with each other and I liked the pace of how their relationship grew.
All the manga stuff went over my head. I don't follow it or know much to anything about it. It was a learning experience, but unfortunately one I couldn't find an interest in. This left me a bit bored and being bored with the length of this book had me putting it aside a lot. But I am never one to give up one a book. It just took me a bit longer then usual to finish it.
I really think this book is beautifully written with a great love story. It just wasn't for me.
Happy reading dolls! xx
This was quite the long read. And it felt it.
It took me a minute to get into it and start enjoying it. Until I didn't.
The relationship between Skylar and Xavier was my favorite part of the book. They were very sweet with each other and I liked the pace of how their relationship grew.
All the manga stuff went over my head. I don't follow it or know much to anything about it. It was a learning experience, but unfortunately one I couldn't find an interest in. This left me a bit bored and being bored with the length of this book had me putting it aside a lot. But I am never one to give up one a book. It just took me a bit longer then usual to finish it.
I really think this book is beautifully written with a great love story. It just wasn't for me.
Happy reading dolls! xx
August 2, 2017
I absolutely loved Heidi Cullinan's Carry the Ocean and Shelter the Sea . So when I saw that there was a new book coming out by this amazing author...I jumped on it ;)
Now I am gonna confess and say that I knew absolutely nothing about this book before I started it, so imagine my surprise and intrigue when I found out that one of the characters is asexual (or somewhere on the spectrum). I have to admit that I'm pretty clueless when it comes to asexuality or anything really, that falls into the grey area of sexuality. So color me intrigued.
Now that said...I also want point out, that there is no sexual content in this story. There is love though....but without the coventional physical part. This didn't bother me at all, because I myself don't need it to enjoy a good story. I also think it was refreshing to read that love can be shown in many different ways. I am just putting it out there for those who want to know.
This is a story about two young men with a baggage of issues falling in love. Now when I say issues..I am not talking about their sexuality.
Xander is an anti-social the artist, Skylar the golden frat boy. Both of them are students at the same college, which is how they meet, when they start working on a project together. During all this they become closer and fall in love. They explore their love and sexuality and it was sweet and beautiful.
Now why not a full 4 stars.... Well the book kind of lost me with all the Japanese culture. I don't know anything about it and to be honest..I am not really interested either. I also don't know crap about manga, other then sometimes scrolling through pics on pinterest.
So while I enjoyed this story...there were also parts I struggled with. This is personal preference though. All in all it was a very sweet and different YA with a lovely HEA.
My reviews are posted on Dirty Books Obsession
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July 13, 2017Cover reveal with exclusive excerpt at HEA USA Today. Art by Natsukoworks. Design by Kanaxa.
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September 8, 2017
What I wanted and what happened...not the same thing...
First things first, let's get it out of the way right off the bat...I am totally a Heidi Cullinan fan. I read and loved more than a couple of her books...Nowhere Ranch, Carry the Ocean, Dance With Me, her Minnesota series...I've loved them all...and I wanted to love this one truly I did...but I just couldn't.
Now the other thing I want to make perfectly clear is that I was given an audio copy of this book in exchange for a fair and honest review. So yes, I listened to this book from start to finish and the result was that at the end of it all. There was more that didn't work for me than did. I'm going to try and explain some of both but at the end of it all there are a lot of really good reviews out there both for and against this book...read them, check them all out because you never know one mans treasure and all that....
Let's start with what attracted me to this book and whether it in fact worked for me or not...
The cover...specifically the manga art style used. I raised a son who loves manga. It's not a passion that he got from either of his parents...he found it all on his own and he shared it with his mom. I've read 'Full Metal Alchemist' I've watched the anime, I've also watched 'Wolf's Rain' , 'Samurai Champloo' and 'Deathnote' and I've read some of 'Bleach', 'Nana' and a few more with titles that elude me at the moment. Trust me it's been a few years and my point is not that I'm an expert by any stretch of the imagination just that this is something that I'm familiar with so it's a bit of the reason that my eye was drawn to the cover of this book.
The whole aspect of these college kids being into mange...yeah, that worked for me. I've had more than a few college age kids pass through the doors of my home and more than a few of them have been dedicated fans to one or more anime/mange titles.
What didn't work for me was the 'over the top' fanaticism about Japanese culture. I can understand and appreciate someone having a really strong interest...dedication, if you will to Japanese culture. It's a culture that steeped in ritual, beauty and an incredible history but somewhere along the way in this story I started to feel like the focus was more about Japan than the story that was being told.
I was intrigued by the idea of a story with characters who weren't the usual straight, gay, bi colors on the rainbow. I wanted something new different and hopefully maybe at least a little bit enlightening and informative. Sadly I have to say that I really don't feel any more enlightened or informed when it comes to aspects of the ace-spectrum or being non-binary and while I honestly don't expect to learn about gender and/or sexuality in a book that's fiction. I like to at least feel comfortable with the representation that's being presented in the book and I have to admit I'm not sure that I was in this book and that was at least partially due to the fact that there was just too much going on in this story and not enough clarity given to some things.
I'm not even sure that I could really cover all the different aspects of this story...it was a lot! Which leads to my next point...
In general the blurb interested me and this sounded like it was going to be an interesting and enlightening story. Only for me it just ended up being one really, really busy story that sometimes left me feeling like I was running down a lot of dead end roads or maybe more accurately like a dog chasing it's tale...the end was always there in sight and I just couldn't quite catch it...
and lastly on this list...I was offered the opportunity to listen to the audiobook and for some reason the idea of listening to this one on audio sounded like it would be a really good plan...ok, really not so much. I admit it, this ended up being one of the biggest issues I had...
Iggy Toma was the narrator on this one and while I haven't listened to any audio books by this narrator to date. I have listened to a number of samples of books that he's narrated and there are a few of them on my wish list for the next tie I go shopping.
Unfortunately 'Antisocial' was not a good match for me. There were times that it seemed like Xander and Skylar's voices sounded remarkably close. Skylar's friend, Unc simply did not sound like a young college student...but more like some of the seniors that I cared for when I worked in a nursing home. But worse than any of this was Xander's friend Zelda. I wanted them to be feisty, confident, person who stood up not just for themselves but for their friends and I'm sorry to say that was not what came to mind when I heard Zelda's voice. Quite honestly what came to mind whenever Zelda spoke was the word 'harpy'...again people, this is very much a personal preference issue. Other's who listened to the audio book may very well differ in how they perceived Zelda's voice...once again it's subjective opinion time.
While there are things that may or may not work for each of us as readers. This is something that I think is common to all books and while I really, really wanted and thought that I was going to love this audio book at the end of the story it turns out that I didn't...am I sorry that I took the time to listen to it...no I'm not. It was a listening experience that I appreciate the author sharing with me.
First things first, let's get it out of the way right off the bat...I am totally a Heidi Cullinan fan. I read and loved more than a couple of her books...Nowhere Ranch, Carry the Ocean, Dance With Me, her Minnesota series...I've loved them all...and I wanted to love this one truly I did...but I just couldn't.
Now the other thing I want to make perfectly clear is that I was given an audio copy of this book in exchange for a fair and honest review. So yes, I listened to this book from start to finish and the result was that at the end of it all. There was more that didn't work for me than did. I'm going to try and explain some of both but at the end of it all there are a lot of really good reviews out there both for and against this book...read them, check them all out because you never know one mans treasure and all that....
Let's start with what attracted me to this book and whether it in fact worked for me or not...
The cover...specifically the manga art style used. I raised a son who loves manga. It's not a passion that he got from either of his parents...he found it all on his own and he shared it with his mom. I've read 'Full Metal Alchemist' I've watched the anime, I've also watched 'Wolf's Rain' , 'Samurai Champloo' and 'Deathnote' and I've read some of 'Bleach', 'Nana' and a few more with titles that elude me at the moment. Trust me it's been a few years and my point is not that I'm an expert by any stretch of the imagination just that this is something that I'm familiar with so it's a bit of the reason that my eye was drawn to the cover of this book.
The whole aspect of these college kids being into mange...yeah, that worked for me. I've had more than a few college age kids pass through the doors of my home and more than a few of them have been dedicated fans to one or more anime/mange titles.
What didn't work for me was the 'over the top' fanaticism about Japanese culture. I can understand and appreciate someone having a really strong interest...dedication, if you will to Japanese culture. It's a culture that steeped in ritual, beauty and an incredible history but somewhere along the way in this story I started to feel like the focus was more about Japan than the story that was being told.
I was intrigued by the idea of a story with characters who weren't the usual straight, gay, bi colors on the rainbow. I wanted something new different and hopefully maybe at least a little bit enlightening and informative. Sadly I have to say that I really don't feel any more enlightened or informed when it comes to aspects of the ace-spectrum or being non-binary and while I honestly don't expect to learn about gender and/or sexuality in a book that's fiction. I like to at least feel comfortable with the representation that's being presented in the book and I have to admit I'm not sure that I was in this book and that was at least partially due to the fact that there was just too much going on in this story and not enough clarity given to some things.
I'm not even sure that I could really cover all the different aspects of this story...it was a lot! Which leads to my next point...
In general the blurb interested me and this sounded like it was going to be an interesting and enlightening story. Only for me it just ended up being one really, really busy story that sometimes left me feeling like I was running down a lot of dead end roads or maybe more accurately like a dog chasing it's tale...the end was always there in sight and I just couldn't quite catch it...
and lastly on this list...I was offered the opportunity to listen to the audiobook and for some reason the idea of listening to this one on audio sounded like it would be a really good plan...ok, really not so much. I admit it, this ended up being one of the biggest issues I had...
Iggy Toma was the narrator on this one and while I haven't listened to any audio books by this narrator to date. I have listened to a number of samples of books that he's narrated and there are a few of them on my wish list for the next tie I go shopping.
Unfortunately 'Antisocial' was not a good match for me. There were times that it seemed like Xander and Skylar's voices sounded remarkably close. Skylar's friend, Unc simply did not sound like a young college student...but more like some of the seniors that I cared for when I worked in a nursing home. But worse than any of this was Xander's friend Zelda. I wanted them to be feisty, confident, person who stood up not just for themselves but for their friends and I'm sorry to say that was not what came to mind when I heard Zelda's voice. Quite honestly what came to mind whenever Zelda spoke was the word 'harpy'...again people, this is very much a personal preference issue. Other's who listened to the audio book may very well differ in how they perceived Zelda's voice...once again it's subjective opinion time.
While there are things that may or may not work for each of us as readers. This is something that I think is common to all books and while I really, really wanted and thought that I was going to love this audio book at the end of the story it turns out that I didn't...am I sorry that I took the time to listen to it...no I'm not. It was a listening experience that I appreciate the author sharing with me.
December 30, 2019
3.5 Hearts
I wasn’t sure what I was getting into, having no knowledge of manga or anime, but overall, I enjoyed this quasi enemies to lovers story that was rich with self exploration and confirmation.
This starts off with Xander. He’s basically a curmudgeon and totally owns it, eschewing things like hanging out and socializing with his peers, despite him sorta wishing things were different. Mostly, Xander simply wants to be left alone to draw, paint, and create. However, he’s not so lucky, as his senior project demands that he sell himself and his upcoming art show - the marketing and public turn out being half his final grade. Just the thought makes him queasy and angry, and he wishes that such wasn’t required for graduation.
One day, Xander’s confronted by gorgeous frat boy Skylar, who tries to make amends for some of his wayward “brothers” defacing Xander’s school mural. It’s all Xander can do to barely hide his contempt, but Skylar is not one to easily give up, for he’s quite taken with the intriguing artist’s works. When Skylar discovers he can help Xander for his own senior project - to promote and advertise a brand in a unique and fantastic way - he’s sees this as a repayment of sorts that will benefit both of them.
Perhaps surprisingly, things don't go as planned or as smoothly as they think it will. Xander is still reluctant, not really ready to compromise any part of himself, and distressingly, it becomes increasingly difficult to keep his attraction to the charming Skylar under wraps as they spend more and more time together. In turn, instead of imparting change in Xander, it’s Skylar who is more affected. He’s mesmerized by Xander’s artistic prowess and his uncompromising personality and values, all of which open Skylar to new feelings that he’s never had for anyone before.
This was a slow sedate burn as Xander and Skylar bond over their mutual love for manga and anime. The day ins and outs of these two guys slowly becoming friends and then discovering their attraction and navigating all sorts of landmines - sexuality, labels, self and not so self imposed expectations - unfold scarily and fiercely but also, exhilaratingly as well!
Though this is only the second time I’ve listened to Iggy Toma, he continues to be a wonderful narrator, and there’s absolutely not one complaint. Again, I didn’t have huge expectations going into this, and I admit that 400+ pages was a very daunting thing to me. However, the audio and Cullinan make this story interesting, as Cullinan typically imparts the reader with some sort of lesson, pointing out that love comes in many shapes and sizes, lending plenty of insight regarding the ace/gray spectrum. Hence, her diversity regarding her lovely NA stories always show personal growth, mainly dealing with finding self acceptance. Though this was quite low on the steam, it was high enough in the feels to counteract such, which of course, focuses very very nicely on one finding grand love!
Thanks to the author/publisher for the audio in exchange for a honest review
I wasn’t sure what I was getting into, having no knowledge of manga or anime, but overall, I enjoyed this quasi enemies to lovers story that was rich with self exploration and confirmation.
This starts off with Xander. He’s basically a curmudgeon and totally owns it, eschewing things like hanging out and socializing with his peers, despite him sorta wishing things were different. Mostly, Xander simply wants to be left alone to draw, paint, and create. However, he’s not so lucky, as his senior project demands that he sell himself and his upcoming art show - the marketing and public turn out being half his final grade. Just the thought makes him queasy and angry, and he wishes that such wasn’t required for graduation.
One day, Xander’s confronted by gorgeous frat boy Skylar, who tries to make amends for some of his wayward “brothers” defacing Xander’s school mural. It’s all Xander can do to barely hide his contempt, but Skylar is not one to easily give up, for he’s quite taken with the intriguing artist’s works. When Skylar discovers he can help Xander for his own senior project - to promote and advertise a brand in a unique and fantastic way - he’s sees this as a repayment of sorts that will benefit both of them.
Perhaps surprisingly, things don't go as planned or as smoothly as they think it will. Xander is still reluctant, not really ready to compromise any part of himself, and distressingly, it becomes increasingly difficult to keep his attraction to the charming Skylar under wraps as they spend more and more time together. In turn, instead of imparting change in Xander, it’s Skylar who is more affected. He’s mesmerized by Xander’s artistic prowess and his uncompromising personality and values, all of which open Skylar to new feelings that he’s never had for anyone before.
This was a slow sedate burn as Xander and Skylar bond over their mutual love for manga and anime. The day ins and outs of these two guys slowly becoming friends and then discovering their attraction and navigating all sorts of landmines - sexuality, labels, self and not so self imposed expectations - unfold scarily and fiercely but also, exhilaratingly as well!
Though this is only the second time I’ve listened to Iggy Toma, he continues to be a wonderful narrator, and there’s absolutely not one complaint. Again, I didn’t have huge expectations going into this, and I admit that 400+ pages was a very daunting thing to me. However, the audio and Cullinan make this story interesting, as Cullinan typically imparts the reader with some sort of lesson, pointing out that love comes in many shapes and sizes, lending plenty of insight regarding the ace/gray spectrum. Hence, her diversity regarding her lovely NA stories always show personal growth, mainly dealing with finding self acceptance. Though this was quite low on the steam, it was high enough in the feels to counteract such, which of course, focuses very very nicely on one finding grand love!
Thanks to the author/publisher for the audio in exchange for a honest review
March 31, 2019
I'm gonna be odd man out on this. I had some major issues. This started off really strong and I was enjoying cranky Xander and very serious Skylar getting to know each other. They were entertaining to watch as they bumbled around and became friends and then finally admitted they liked each other.
As it went on though I started feeling like I was reading a YA book and I deliberately don't read those for a reason. While these two were in their early twenties (21 & 23) they had zero relationship experience. This was very much a first love story. They were very shy and very sweet and very reserved and I felt like I was reading about teens. Since I'm a *bit* older than that and have tweens of my own & it kind of squicks me out. I know a lot of adults read YA w/no issues but it just is a no go for me. So, while it wasn't technically YA, it really, really felt that way.
The asexual representation of one of the MC's was done in a way I haven't read before so that was interesting to me. I have seen other reviews that are critical of the representation though. I have no first hand knowledge of this & do not feel I'm qualified to make a judgment on it. I encourage you to check out other more informed reviews.
I also felt like this was too long. I found myself losing interest by 60% and I felt like things could have been wrapped up quicker. It was hard to push myself through the last 20%. I barely finished this. There was too much unneeded (imo) drama at the end.
Both of the above mentioned things though could have been overlooked but this last one was really a big issue for me. I hate writing reviews and pointing out things that I find offensive or inappropriate. I'm not a big fan of the morality police when it comes to books and I know I've personally rolled my eyes a few times at other people's reviews in the past when they bring up things I don't agree with. That being said, I just can't bypass how icky the Japanese obsession by these characters made me feel. I don't read magna or anime but I get how people love it. I liked how the students worked on a magna magazine and talked about series and artists they loved. That I understood. But the whole school being based on the love of Japanese culture, the nonstop talk about it, life goals being to move to Japan, layout out tea & sake to Japanese gods and most disturbingly, getting turned on in sexual situations because one's partner speaks Japanese, just reeked of cultural appropriation to me. (And maybe it jumped right over that line and moved on to weird and creepy fetish level.)
So....this was not my jam. I think there are some major issues with this book and I encourage to read some other reviews. There are some really well thought out ones discussing both the Ace rep and the cultural appropriation in more detail than this review.
**ARC provided through Netgalley in exchange for an honest review**
As it went on though I started feeling like I was reading a YA book and I deliberately don't read those for a reason. While these two were in their early twenties (21 & 23) they had zero relationship experience. This was very much a first love story. They were very shy and very sweet and very reserved and I felt like I was reading about teens. Since I'm a *bit* older than that and have tweens of my own & it kind of squicks me out. I know a lot of adults read YA w/no issues but it just is a no go for me. So, while it wasn't technically YA, it really, really felt that way.
The asexual representation of one of the MC's was done in a way I haven't read before so that was interesting to me. I have seen other reviews that are critical of the representation though. I have no first hand knowledge of this & do not feel I'm qualified to make a judgment on it. I encourage you to check out other more informed reviews.
I also felt like this was too long. I found myself losing interest by 60% and I felt like things could have been wrapped up quicker. It was hard to push myself through the last 20%. I barely finished this. There was too much unneeded (imo) drama at the end.
Both of the above mentioned things though could have been overlooked but this last one was really a big issue for me. I hate writing reviews and pointing out things that I find offensive or inappropriate. I'm not a big fan of the morality police when it comes to books and I know I've personally rolled my eyes a few times at other people's reviews in the past when they bring up things I don't agree with. That being said, I just can't bypass how icky the Japanese obsession by these characters made me feel. I don't read magna or anime but I get how people love it. I liked how the students worked on a magna magazine and talked about series and artists they loved. That I understood. But the whole school being based on the love of Japanese culture, the nonstop talk about it, life goals being to move to Japan, layout out tea & sake to Japanese gods and most disturbingly, getting turned on in sexual situations because one's partner speaks Japanese, just reeked of cultural appropriation to me. (And maybe it jumped right over that line and moved on to weird and creepy fetish level.)
So....this was not my jam. I think there are some major issues with this book and I encourage to read some other reviews. There are some really well thought out ones discussing both the Ace rep and the cultural appropriation in more detail than this review.
**ARC provided through Netgalley in exchange for an honest review**
November 30, 2020
Not my favourite Heidi I have to admit, but this was a delightful opposites attract story of two young guys, as alike as chalk and cheese, trying to find their way as best they can, with little or no parental help, and it tried to teach me an awful lot about Japanese culture [yes I'm interested, but that's about as far as it goes], manga, anime, grey spectrum sexuality and Japanese food. I've no doubt that readers/addicts of yaoi, manga and anime will understand far more than I did [or honestly want to], and that's fine...I wanted to read the story cos Heidi made Skylar and Xander's romance sound so appealing, and when I saw the cover she'd chosen, I definitely knew I wanted to read it, it's beautiful!! 4.5 stars from me.
As with Carry the Ocean and it's sequel Shelter the Sea, there is NO descriptive on-page sex in this story...I repeat NO sex, and as a frequent reader of YA stories, I'm used to this, and it certainly doesn't bother me. Skylar is asexual, Xander is gay and both boys are virgins, and their make out sessions consisted of gradually building up to touching and kissing....it was erotic and very sensual, and quite different to anything I'd previously read. As far as the grey spectrum sexuality is concerned, I can say that I was unaware [read clueless] that there were so many different categories nowadays, although I've obviously done my fair share of Googling since starting the story.
Both boys have parent problems which I won't go into here...I want you to enjoy the story yourselves, but I will just say that Skylar's biological egg donor [I can't call her mother, cos she certainly didn't behave like a real mother should] made me see red on several occasions. Their surrogate family consists of co-workers on the Lucky 7 magazine, which Xander draws for and Skylar hopes to contribute stories to, and Lucky 7 of course refers to the Japanese Gods of Fortune....
If I have a niggle at all, it's that the story seemed to be a little rushed at the end, but that's a minor point.
This was another wonderful romance from Heidi Cullinan, and I'm proud to be a member of her Patreon.
not-gonna-happen-because-reasons
September 13, 2017I will not be reading and reviewing this book for two reasons. Please note both reasons come from trusted friends/readers who have read the book.
1. Harmful asexual rep
2. Fetishization of Japanese culture
Please see the review below for more detailed information.
https://www.goodreads.com/review/show...
ARC provided by author in exchange for an honest review.
January 28, 2022
3.5*
I want to say at the start that this book is beautiful. Impeccably researched, detailed in Japanese culture, anime and manga and featuring a love story which goes beyond the normal physical expressions into something soul deep.
However, as beautifully written as this book is, it's not a five star read for me only for the simple reason that the whole Japanese culture element of it isn't something I'm personally interested in and, as it anchored the whole narrative, I wasn't as engaged in it as someone who does have a fascination with it probably would be.
However, it is so rare to get a love story which, even within the LGBTQ+ world, isn't a conventional one so it was a delight to read. Here Heidi Cullinan does it with some style as she depicts how someone identifying on the ace/gray spectrum finds the perfect person to become his.
The Greek myth of Galatea and Pygmalion - so famously turned into a play by Sir George Bernard Shaw and then into My Fair Lady, starring Rex Harrison and Audrey Hepburn - forms the basis of this romance as business student and future lawyer Skylar Stone takes on the project of putting reluctant Xander Fairchild's art out into the world as part of his senior project.
Xander is anti-social, the artist responsible for the manga comic produced at the college they both attend, and a bit of an enigma. He's also perfect for Skylar as he sees beneath the frat boy to the scared and confused young man beneath.
This story is so well written, the sensuality and eroticism of watching the two fall in love is superbly done, there is no "sex" in this book but there absolutely is a whole host of making love as Xander discovers just how much he can be turned on by watching Skylar find himself aroused by a simple touch.
The painting scene alone is an exercise on how to make something incredibly sexy and stimulating without the trappings of penetration in any form and their romance oozes intimate connections and passionate loving which fits perfectly within the sexuality of the protagonists.
#ARC received from the publishers via NetGalley in return for an honest and unbiased review
I want to say at the start that this book is beautiful. Impeccably researched, detailed in Japanese culture, anime and manga and featuring a love story which goes beyond the normal physical expressions into something soul deep.
However, as beautifully written as this book is, it's not a five star read for me only for the simple reason that the whole Japanese culture element of it isn't something I'm personally interested in and, as it anchored the whole narrative, I wasn't as engaged in it as someone who does have a fascination with it probably would be.
However, it is so rare to get a love story which, even within the LGBTQ+ world, isn't a conventional one so it was a delight to read. Here Heidi Cullinan does it with some style as she depicts how someone identifying on the ace/gray spectrum finds the perfect person to become his.
The Greek myth of Galatea and Pygmalion - so famously turned into a play by Sir George Bernard Shaw and then into My Fair Lady, starring Rex Harrison and Audrey Hepburn - forms the basis of this romance as business student and future lawyer Skylar Stone takes on the project of putting reluctant Xander Fairchild's art out into the world as part of his senior project.
Xander is anti-social, the artist responsible for the manga comic produced at the college they both attend, and a bit of an enigma. He's also perfect for Skylar as he sees beneath the frat boy to the scared and confused young man beneath.
This story is so well written, the sensuality and eroticism of watching the two fall in love is superbly done, there is no "sex" in this book but there absolutely is a whole host of making love as Xander discovers just how much he can be turned on by watching Skylar find himself aroused by a simple touch.
The painting scene alone is an exercise on how to make something incredibly sexy and stimulating without the trappings of penetration in any form and their romance oozes intimate connections and passionate loving which fits perfectly within the sexuality of the protagonists.
#ARC received from the publishers via NetGalley in return for an honest and unbiased review
August 29, 2017
When I heard Heidi Cullinan was publishing a story with a focus on asexual/grey-sexuality I was immediately more than just intrigued - I was desperate to get my hands on Antisocial.
Xander Fairchild is an artist who is, in a word, antisocial. He eschews social settings (with reasons) and is determined to spend his last year at Japanese culture-soaked Benten college working on his BFA project and creating manga art.
Skylar Stone has his own senior project to complete and when circumstances bring him in contact with Xander he cannot help but be intrigued by both his art and the man himself. Skylar manipulates some other circumstances as a way to help Xander and himself, but doesn't count on the feelings Xander opens up in him.
The story is beautiful. Told from both Xander and Skylar's points of view the reader is given good insight into both character's motives and thoughts. Saturated in references to Manga and Japanese culture, and threaded with a coming of age of the characters the story flows well, the characters show real growth, and there is obvious love woven through the story by the author.
While I enjoyed the story on the whole, I do not have any great experience with Yaoi, Manga, or Japanese culture and though I learned a lot reading this I think if I was a fan of any of those elements I might have enjoyed this a whole lot more.*
A lovely, sweet, coming of age romance with low angst and a great HEA. Recommended especially for those who love Manga or Japanese culture.
Advanced Review Galley copy of Antisocial provided by the author via NetGalley in exchange of an honest review.
This review has been cross-posted at Gay Book Reviews.
*ETA 8/28/2017: It has been brought to my attention that the story may have issues with both the depiction of Aro/Ace sexuality and Japanese culture. If my review is offensive because of my ignorance of either subject please accept my sincere apology.
Xander Fairchild is an artist who is, in a word, antisocial. He eschews social settings (with reasons) and is determined to spend his last year at Japanese culture-soaked Benten college working on his BFA project and creating manga art.
Skylar Stone has his own senior project to complete and when circumstances bring him in contact with Xander he cannot help but be intrigued by both his art and the man himself. Skylar manipulates some other circumstances as a way to help Xander and himself, but doesn't count on the feelings Xander opens up in him.
The story is beautiful. Told from both Xander and Skylar's points of view the reader is given good insight into both character's motives and thoughts. Saturated in references to Manga and Japanese culture, and threaded with a coming of age of the characters the story flows well, the characters show real growth, and there is obvious love woven through the story by the author.
While I enjoyed the story on the whole, I do not have any great experience with Yaoi, Manga, or Japanese culture and though I learned a lot reading this I think if I was a fan of any of those elements I might have enjoyed this a whole lot more.*
A lovely, sweet, coming of age romance with low angst and a great HEA. Recommended especially for those who love Manga or Japanese culture.
Advanced Review Galley copy of Antisocial provided by the author via NetGalley in exchange of an honest review.
This review has been cross-posted at Gay Book Reviews.
*ETA 8/28/2017: It has been brought to my attention that the story may have issues with both the depiction of Aro/Ace sexuality and Japanese culture. If my review is offensive because of my ignorance of either subject please accept my sincere apology.
December 3, 2017
🌸🌸🌸3,5 stars rounded up 🌸🌸🌸
It's my first book by this author and what a discovery it was. I already have Carry the ocean and now I think I'll move it up in my TBR.
I knew close to nothing about manga or anime or even Japanese culture before starting this book.
I have to admit I got lost with so many details that didn't make sense to me. I kind of wanted the story to focus more on Skylar and Xander. I simply adored these broken characters, both feeling like they didn't fit into the world, both having families who didn't understand or treasure them.
Overall I enjoyed this story. It was long, longer than I expected, and I need to mention that both main characters are in the gray spectrum of sexuality. But for them it wasn't about sex, they just clicked and they understood each other even if they were extremely different. One was an introverted and antisocial artist, the other was overly social and always wearing a mask with a perfect smile.
I think this book was more of a coming of age story, for both of them. In the end they discovered what they really wanted, they faced their fears and followed their dreams.
Oh and the ending was extremely sweet and left me smiling big, imagining Skylar under a rain of cherry flowers.
"Skylar glanced up as the petals fell, then held out his hands, laughing as he caught the flowers. Xander smiled and etched the image onto his heart." 🌸
Copy kindly provided through NetGalley, in exchange for an honest and unbiased review.
It's my first book by this author and what a discovery it was. I already have Carry the ocean and now I think I'll move it up in my TBR.
I knew close to nothing about manga or anime or even Japanese culture before starting this book.
I have to admit I got lost with so many details that didn't make sense to me. I kind of wanted the story to focus more on Skylar and Xander. I simply adored these broken characters, both feeling like they didn't fit into the world, both having families who didn't understand or treasure them.
Overall I enjoyed this story. It was long, longer than I expected, and I need to mention that both main characters are in the gray spectrum of sexuality. But for them it wasn't about sex, they just clicked and they understood each other even if they were extremely different. One was an introverted and antisocial artist, the other was overly social and always wearing a mask with a perfect smile.
I think this book was more of a coming of age story, for both of them. In the end they discovered what they really wanted, they faced their fears and followed their dreams.
Oh and the ending was extremely sweet and left me smiling big, imagining Skylar under a rain of cherry flowers.
"Skylar glanced up as the petals fell, then held out his hands, laughing as he caught the flowers. Xander smiled and etched the image onto his heart." 🌸
Copy kindly provided through NetGalley, in exchange for an honest and unbiased review.
August 5, 2017
An ARC of this book was graciously provided to me through NetGalley. Thank you.
"Sō desu ne"
(according to the author, that's something you say when you don't know what else to say)
OK, so I never read anything before about asexuality and here is this book waving all sorts of different kinds of "ace labels" and including not one but two asexual characters ...
Wait I said it all wrong, because if really this book wanted to teach something it would be to not try to label what you see, put everything and everyone in a nice box with a cute (or not) tag on it. And this, not only from the sexual perspective but in all personal interactions, including how you see and define yourself, accepting or rejecting what others see, what they want you to be or how they influence or judge you.
See we start with a grumpy, glaring, antisocial character on one side, and a highly polished, successful, comfortable, smiling and self-assured character on the other ... well apart from glaring and smiling which are sort of factual, you can throw all other labels in the previous sentence away. Because things are more complex than they seem, because people are not as simple as first impressions, because their family and peers' expectations or opinions weight on them influencing their behavior.
But Skylar sees Xander ...
And Xander sees beyond the "ting" smile and veneer-covered personality that Skylar shows to the world. And because he has already acknowledged his own wounds, although he doesn't know how to deal with them, he can feel Skylar ones and the way he acts with utmost respect for who Skylar is, never assuming or judging, allows Skylar to start looking at himself differently :
Xander turns out to be the one who, as antisocial as he may seem, has given the most consideration and reflection to social interactions.
And he is very straight forward and simple even in the turmoil of his burgeoning relation with Skylar :
So you get it, I liked Skylar a lot, but I loved Xander. His honesty and no-bulls**t thinking, the way he cares for others even while he seems to avoid them ... Loved him !
Besides the characters, just let me state that :
I am not American , so not familiar with college and fraternities life.
I am not Japanese, so not familiar with the language, the culture and even with manga.
and while a lot revolved around those two topics, mainly the second, it was not too heavy to digest or understand.
And I am not either asexual or an artist, but boy were those painting scenes hot !...
"Sō desu ne"
(according to the author, that's something you say when you don't know what else to say)
OK, so I never read anything before about asexuality and here is this book waving all sorts of different kinds of "ace labels" and including not one but two asexual characters ...
Wait I said it all wrong, because if really this book wanted to teach something it would be to not try to label what you see, put everything and everyone in a nice box with a cute (or not) tag on it. And this, not only from the sexual perspective but in all personal interactions, including how you see and define yourself, accepting or rejecting what others see, what they want you to be or how they influence or judge you.
See we start with a grumpy, glaring, antisocial character on one side, and a highly polished, successful, comfortable, smiling and self-assured character on the other ... well apart from glaring and smiling which are sort of factual, you can throw all other labels in the previous sentence away. Because things are more complex than they seem, because people are not as simple as first impressions, because their family and peers' expectations or opinions weight on them influencing their behavior.
But Skylar sees Xander ...
"You're not grouchy. You're reserved. You're not antisocial. You're shy."
And Xander sees beyond the "ting" smile and veneer-covered personality that Skylar shows to the world. And because he has already acknowledged his own wounds, although he doesn't know how to deal with them, he can feel Skylar ones and the way he acts with utmost respect for who Skylar is, never assuming or judging, allows Skylar to start looking at himself differently :
"He's not turning you into anything. He's only chipping away your stone and showing you what's already there."
Xander turns out to be the one who, as antisocial as he may seem, has given the most consideration and reflection to social interactions.
"There are definitely people who feel they must run around and police the way everyone else speaks about themselves, who think there's a right and wrong way to be queer and gay and gray and everything that isn't straight cisgender. Me, I'd rather ignore the arguments and paint, but I do prefer to know how individual people identify, and I try to get it right when I talk to and about them, because it's polite. Beyond that, I figure, none of my business."
And he is very straight forward and simple even in the turmoil of his burgeoning relation with Skylar :
"This world is a nightmare full of pain. You found someone you can make beauty with. Don't question how it happens or worry you aren't doing it the right way. Call yourself demi, or an ace or gray or refuse to take a name. Call yourself the man who loves Xander Fairchild, the grumpiest, most antisocial a**hole who ever lived. The one who made Xander love someone back."
So you get it, I liked Skylar a lot, but I loved Xander. His honesty and no-bulls**t thinking, the way he cares for others even while he seems to avoid them ... Loved him !
Besides the characters, just let me state that :
I am not American , so not familiar with college and fraternities life.
I am not Japanese, so not familiar with the language, the culture and even with manga.
and while a lot revolved around those two topics, mainly the second, it was not too heavy to digest or understand.
And I am not either asexual or an artist, but boy were those painting scenes hot !...
July 20, 2017
*An ARC was provided by the author in exchange for an honest review*
"Art is not finished, only abandoned."
Sometimes, you start a book, and a few pages in you get the feeling you had underestimated the importance of it, whether it be the importance of it to you personally or to the world as a whole.
I did just that with this book, and I did it in both ways.
I stumbled upon Love Lessons last year, and ever since I have been a devoted fan of the author. Her books are always cute, quirky, romantic, diverse, and hilarious. When I read the Love Lessons trilogy, I was in love with them. When I read the Roosevelt series, I felt educated on the lives of those who don’t fall under the umbrella of neurotypical.
But when I read Antisocial, I felt a personal connection to not only the characters, but the story itself. Was it because I could relate to some of the struggles of the characters? Yes. Was it because I have a lot of odd interests that were center stage in this book? Also yes. But the reason this book hit me personally, is because I could tell it was personal to the author.
Xander and Skylar weren’t the typical quirky, but otherwise average guys that usually get portrayed in New Adult romances. They were awkward and scared, and their relationship showcased that. If you’re looking for suave quips and sexy times, this book is probably not for you.
This is a spoiler, but it’s such an important aspect of the novel that I have to discuss it.
On top of handling minority sexualities, like asexual, pansexual, and demisexual, this book tackled the effects parents have on their children whether intentional or unintentional, and mental illness. One of the characters has a severe anxiety disorder, and another has depression.
After all these heavier topics, I would like to clarify that overall this book was just as cute and fun as all her novels, if not even more so. It had everything.
Perfect read for fans of New Adult, LGBTQ, and of course, romance.
"Art is not finished, only abandoned."
Sometimes, you start a book, and a few pages in you get the feeling you had underestimated the importance of it, whether it be the importance of it to you personally or to the world as a whole.
I did just that with this book, and I did it in both ways.
I stumbled upon Love Lessons last year, and ever since I have been a devoted fan of the author. Her books are always cute, quirky, romantic, diverse, and hilarious. When I read the Love Lessons trilogy, I was in love with them. When I read the Roosevelt series, I felt educated on the lives of those who don’t fall under the umbrella of neurotypical.
But when I read Antisocial, I felt a personal connection to not only the characters, but the story itself. Was it because I could relate to some of the struggles of the characters? Yes. Was it because I have a lot of odd interests that were center stage in this book? Also yes. But the reason this book hit me personally, is because I could tell it was personal to the author.
Xander and Skylar weren’t the typical quirky, but otherwise average guys that usually get portrayed in New Adult romances. They were awkward and scared, and their relationship showcased that. If you’re looking for suave quips and sexy times, this book is probably not for you.
This is a spoiler, but it’s such an important aspect of the novel that I have to discuss it.
On top of handling minority sexualities, like asexual, pansexual, and demisexual, this book tackled the effects parents have on their children whether intentional or unintentional, and mental illness. One of the characters has a severe anxiety disorder, and another has depression.
After all these heavier topics, I would like to clarify that overall this book was just as cute and fun as all her novels, if not even more so. It had everything.
Perfect read for fans of New Adult, LGBTQ, and of course, romance.
August 5, 2017
ALL. THE. STARS.
I'm a fangirl of Heidi's and I was absolutely thrilled to be offered an ARC of this book--I just wish I'd read it sooner, because I have so many feels right now. As an ace-spec person, I truly love seeing more characters on the asexual spectrum in fiction, and her depiction of Skylar was a delight. I can very much empathize with his feelings over thinking he was ace, not wanting to embrace the label, and being so scared of coming out. His entire journey was amazing.
And Xander. Heidi excels at writing college-student grumps (Elijah, anyone?) who are sharp on the outside, but have a marshmallow center for certain people. He and Skylar created a relationship with was perfect for them, society's expectations be damned, and I enjoyed every moment of it. I shed a few tears in a few spots, and I laughed out loud in others. I'm also going to be investigating manga more thoroughly now.
Not a reviewer, just a fan. But this fan loves this book.
I'm a fangirl of Heidi's and I was absolutely thrilled to be offered an ARC of this book--I just wish I'd read it sooner, because I have so many feels right now. As an ace-spec person, I truly love seeing more characters on the asexual spectrum in fiction, and her depiction of Skylar was a delight. I can very much empathize with his feelings over thinking he was ace, not wanting to embrace the label, and being so scared of coming out. His entire journey was amazing.
And Xander. Heidi excels at writing college-student grumps (Elijah, anyone?) who are sharp on the outside, but have a marshmallow center for certain people. He and Skylar created a relationship with was perfect for them, society's expectations be damned, and I enjoyed every moment of it. I shed a few tears in a few spots, and I laughed out loud in others. I'm also going to be investigating manga more thoroughly now.
Not a reviewer, just a fan. But this fan loves this book.
April 29, 2018
Belief is powerful and important. Without it, we’re nothing but ants crawling across the dirt
* *
2 / 5
When I read the last page of Antisocial, I really wasn’t sure how to feel about what I had just read. At all. Antisocial is a male/male romance novel that reads like a fanfiction with original characters; the characters begin as archetypes, the whole book is weirdly into Japan yet, as far as I could tell, has no Japanese characters, it’s really cutesy and then exceedingly sexual, it’s serious and deep and then all about the *power of love and friendship* (tm). Antisocial is an odd book, it’s one that I rolled my eyes at one page, awkwardly turned my Kindle off when I was on the bus another page, and then almost cried at.
“he left it unfinished, frustrated because it hadn’t satisfied him the way he wanted, but it had been a heady rush of creation, and now the beast was spent”
To begin with, we have our walking clichés: Xander Fairchild, troubled and angry artist who makes great paintings and then destroys them, who has no friends and doesn’t need any anyway because he just haaaates people they’re so rubbish. Whilst this attitude was a bit annoying, I loved the scenes that focused on Xander as an artist: the process of creation, imagination, and the feeling that your physical art can never match what you have in your head. Then we have Skylar Stone, aspiring lawyer and frat boy, who secretly loves manga and reads Hotay & Moo, the manga that Xander illustrates for the university paper. The two meet when members of Skylar’s fraternity vandalise a mural that Xander had painted; Skylar decides to try and repair the damage by making his senior business project about helping art students develop their business image and social media presence. Xander, who despises social media, is pressured into accepting Skylar’s help by his art professor, who requires that Xander presents a social media plan to get attendees to an art show.
I really enjoyed most of the first half. It’s a sweet, if traditionally fanfiction-esque, meeting, plot, and romance: reluctance to spend any time together on Xander’s part, Skylar’s trying to get to know this reclusive manga artist, the two opening up to each other about their personal problems, which include horrible parents and financial issues. There’s the supporting cast, the members of Lucky 7, who are Xander’s colleagues on the manga, who are diverse and friendly, coming together to support Xander and Skylar like it’s some sort of musical. Antisocial initially had all the hallmarks of a sweet YA romance and I was enjoying it.
And then. Bang on 50%, virtually, it gets really sort of sexual. Xander is gay and has known this since he was young where he was bullied for it. Skylar isn’t really sure what he is, shunning labels and trying to maintain his playboy façade. Disclaimer: I’m asexual (this is important to the review, I swear!). The synopsis suggests that Skylar is gray-spectrum asexuality, which I’m not entirely convinced is a necessary distinction, but that’s neither here nor there. I feel kind of conflicted about the “representation” here; on the one hand, it’s so great to have asexual characters who don’t have sex with their partners to “please them” or whatever nonsense, and for the characters to have an in-depth discussion about what they want. I also felt that Skylar was quite relatable; wanting to have a relationship, to be close with someone, but feeling like this is difficult because you don’t want to have sex and that finding someone who fits those criteria feels like a miracle! I really saw myself in this.
However, they also have these really weird scenes where they hold hands are both panting, acting like hand-holding in front of others is deliciously naughty, and claiming that they are “heavily making out”. Are they Vulcans?? No. I felt like not only was this super weird but that it gave the idea that because Skylar doesn’t want sex, more innocent activities, like hand holding, must become sexualised for Xander. There’s this bit where Xander tells Skylar it’s okay to orgasm when he’s painting on his hand! What. It was also just super awkward to read and definitely pushed the book way out of YA and into adult or new adult, which I felt was a touch misleading.
“the college was rich with Japanese culture, though bizarrely low on people of actual Japanese heritage, and it had always been that way”
The other main problem that I had with this book was that it felt a bit fetish-y. The university campus was supposedly founded by Japanese-Americans to remind them of home, and Xander and Skylar are obsessed with Japan. It was cringe worthy and definitely reminded me of when I was like ten and used random Japanese words in my speech (you know, like desu and whatnot) and drew loads of manga. Bits of Japanese culture absolutely saturate this book and, as far as I can tell (correct me if I’m wrong, please!), there are no Japanese characters in this book. Xander and Skylar dream about moving to Japan, becoming Japanese mangaka, they use random Japanese phrases when they’re getting it on, pack each other Bento lunches and go on hunts for Japanese shrines, refer to their own developing romance in terms of anime. It moved from being about a guy that made a manga and another guy that read and enjoyed it, to being really obsessed and weird.
Like I said, I was very conflicted about this book. On the one hand, the start was amazing and cute and made me smile, and I was impressed by how it had a fanfiction sort of feel but was original, but it was also way too long, the characters felt like young teenagers despite being about 23, and the Japanese influence was too much. Antisocial had a good look at some difficult themes – coming to terms with your sexuality, dealing with pressuring parents – and I applaud the author for doing this, regardless of how I feel that Antisocial missed the mark for me.
My thanks to Netgalley and the author for an ARC of this book
Read this review and more on my blog: https://atlasrisingbooks.wordpress.co...
* *
2 / 5
When I read the last page of Antisocial, I really wasn’t sure how to feel about what I had just read. At all. Antisocial is a male/male romance novel that reads like a fanfiction with original characters; the characters begin as archetypes, the whole book is weirdly into Japan yet, as far as I could tell, has no Japanese characters, it’s really cutesy and then exceedingly sexual, it’s serious and deep and then all about the *power of love and friendship* (tm). Antisocial is an odd book, it’s one that I rolled my eyes at one page, awkwardly turned my Kindle off when I was on the bus another page, and then almost cried at.
“he left it unfinished, frustrated because it hadn’t satisfied him the way he wanted, but it had been a heady rush of creation, and now the beast was spent”
To begin with, we have our walking clichés: Xander Fairchild, troubled and angry artist who makes great paintings and then destroys them, who has no friends and doesn’t need any anyway because he just haaaates people they’re so rubbish. Whilst this attitude was a bit annoying, I loved the scenes that focused on Xander as an artist: the process of creation, imagination, and the feeling that your physical art can never match what you have in your head. Then we have Skylar Stone, aspiring lawyer and frat boy, who secretly loves manga and reads Hotay & Moo, the manga that Xander illustrates for the university paper. The two meet when members of Skylar’s fraternity vandalise a mural that Xander had painted; Skylar decides to try and repair the damage by making his senior business project about helping art students develop their business image and social media presence. Xander, who despises social media, is pressured into accepting Skylar’s help by his art professor, who requires that Xander presents a social media plan to get attendees to an art show.
I really enjoyed most of the first half. It’s a sweet, if traditionally fanfiction-esque, meeting, plot, and romance: reluctance to spend any time together on Xander’s part, Skylar’s trying to get to know this reclusive manga artist, the two opening up to each other about their personal problems, which include horrible parents and financial issues. There’s the supporting cast, the members of Lucky 7, who are Xander’s colleagues on the manga, who are diverse and friendly, coming together to support Xander and Skylar like it’s some sort of musical. Antisocial initially had all the hallmarks of a sweet YA romance and I was enjoying it.
And then. Bang on 50%, virtually, it gets really sort of sexual. Xander is gay and has known this since he was young where he was bullied for it. Skylar isn’t really sure what he is, shunning labels and trying to maintain his playboy façade. Disclaimer: I’m asexual (this is important to the review, I swear!). The synopsis suggests that Skylar is gray-spectrum asexuality, which I’m not entirely convinced is a necessary distinction, but that’s neither here nor there. I feel kind of conflicted about the “representation” here; on the one hand, it’s so great to have asexual characters who don’t have sex with their partners to “please them” or whatever nonsense, and for the characters to have an in-depth discussion about what they want. I also felt that Skylar was quite relatable; wanting to have a relationship, to be close with someone, but feeling like this is difficult because you don’t want to have sex and that finding someone who fits those criteria feels like a miracle! I really saw myself in this.
However, they also have these really weird scenes where they hold hands are both panting, acting like hand-holding in front of others is deliciously naughty, and claiming that they are “heavily making out”. Are they Vulcans?? No. I felt like not only was this super weird but that it gave the idea that because Skylar doesn’t want sex, more innocent activities, like hand holding, must become sexualised for Xander. There’s this bit where Xander tells Skylar it’s okay to orgasm when he’s painting on his hand! What. It was also just super awkward to read and definitely pushed the book way out of YA and into adult or new adult, which I felt was a touch misleading.
“the college was rich with Japanese culture, though bizarrely low on people of actual Japanese heritage, and it had always been that way”
The other main problem that I had with this book was that it felt a bit fetish-y. The university campus was supposedly founded by Japanese-Americans to remind them of home, and Xander and Skylar are obsessed with Japan. It was cringe worthy and definitely reminded me of when I was like ten and used random Japanese words in my speech (you know, like desu and whatnot) and drew loads of manga. Bits of Japanese culture absolutely saturate this book and, as far as I can tell (correct me if I’m wrong, please!), there are no Japanese characters in this book. Xander and Skylar dream about moving to Japan, becoming Japanese mangaka, they use random Japanese phrases when they’re getting it on, pack each other Bento lunches and go on hunts for Japanese shrines, refer to their own developing romance in terms of anime. It moved from being about a guy that made a manga and another guy that read and enjoyed it, to being really obsessed and weird.
Like I said, I was very conflicted about this book. On the one hand, the start was amazing and cute and made me smile, and I was impressed by how it had a fanfiction sort of feel but was original, but it was also way too long, the characters felt like young teenagers despite being about 23, and the Japanese influence was too much. Antisocial had a good look at some difficult themes – coming to terms with your sexuality, dealing with pressuring parents – and I applaud the author for doing this, regardless of how I feel that Antisocial missed the mark for me.
My thanks to Netgalley and the author for an ARC of this book
Read this review and more on my blog: https://atlasrisingbooks.wordpress.co...
July 16, 2017
Can you fall in love with a book? With the spirit of a book? I think you can, and I think I did with Heidi Cullinan's Antisocial. This was a love story unlike any I have read before. It was also one of the most sensual stories I have read in a long time. It was erotic. It had no sex in the conventional way we tend to define it. Somehow, Cullinan made me feel their lovemaking through nothing more than a brush stroke upon bare skin.
This book was a pure joy to read. It was a book about finding oneself, or unmasking oneself. In MM romance, this typically involves issues of sexual orientation or identity. And while this sexual trope held true in Antisocial with a gray MC, the self discovery that shone in this book was that of honoring ones true self in the pursuit of life and passion.
At the beginning, Cullinan introduces us to a curmudgeon of an artist, Xander, finishing his junior year in college. He epitomizes the idea of Antisocial having no close friends outside the circle of a collegiate manga zine. On the other end of the social spectrum we meet Skylar. He is a Fraternity member, a one-percenter, law school bound golden boy with the perfect smile and manners. In short , the opposite of Xander. The two are thrown together to work on Xander's final art show. ......And paint flies. And markers. And brushes. And a colander. And around it all, cherry blossoms fall from the sky.
Initially, I believed that the main journey Cullinan would draw out for us was Xander's. After all, he is the namesake of the title of the book. And while Xander appeared to be the weaker, introverted character who only needed a polish for his true worth to shine through, Cullinan repainted the canvas in the middle of the story to show us just how strong Xander truly was, and how brittle was the plaster shell that held perfect Skyler together.
In the end, both men changed drastically to become who they wanted to be instead of who others thought they should be. In Cullinan's words, they "drew new straight lines." Individually, they did this together, tossing out external labels expectations.
This book is going on my favorites shelf. And I'm going to be asking Heidi for an autographed copy of the print book. That's right, print. I am also beyond delighted to have received a copy of this book nearly a month before it's publish date--all due to being a patron on Heidi's Patreon site.
And now I am going to be spending my time looking up and reading all the manga mentioned in this book. And dreaming of visiting Japan again. And re-reading the body-painting scene. More than once.
Disclaimer: I wrote this review of my own free will. I received a copy because I am a patron of Heidi Cullinan. This was not a free book, just an early one!
Shameless plug for Heidi's Patreon site: become a patron--you get lots of goodies, and updates, and it's just really damned cool to be able to interact with one of your favorite authors.
This book was a pure joy to read. It was a book about finding oneself, or unmasking oneself. In MM romance, this typically involves issues of sexual orientation or identity. And while this sexual trope held true in Antisocial with a gray MC, the self discovery that shone in this book was that of honoring ones true self in the pursuit of life and passion.
At the beginning, Cullinan introduces us to a curmudgeon of an artist, Xander, finishing his junior year in college. He epitomizes the idea of Antisocial having no close friends outside the circle of a collegiate manga zine. On the other end of the social spectrum we meet Skylar. He is a Fraternity member, a one-percenter, law school bound golden boy with the perfect smile and manners. In short , the opposite of Xander. The two are thrown together to work on Xander's final art show. ......And paint flies. And markers. And brushes. And a colander. And around it all, cherry blossoms fall from the sky.
Initially, I believed that the main journey Cullinan would draw out for us was Xander's. After all, he is the namesake of the title of the book. And while Xander appeared to be the weaker, introverted character who only needed a polish for his true worth to shine through, Cullinan repainted the canvas in the middle of the story to show us just how strong Xander truly was, and how brittle was the plaster shell that held perfect Skyler together.
In the end, both men changed drastically to become who they wanted to be instead of who others thought they should be. In Cullinan's words, they "drew new straight lines." Individually, they did this together, tossing out external labels expectations.
This book is going on my favorites shelf. And I'm going to be asking Heidi for an autographed copy of the print book. That's right, print. I am also beyond delighted to have received a copy of this book nearly a month before it's publish date--all due to being a patron on Heidi's Patreon site.
And now I am going to be spending my time looking up and reading all the manga mentioned in this book. And dreaming of visiting Japan again. And re-reading the body-painting scene. More than once.
Disclaimer: I wrote this review of my own free will. I received a copy because I am a patron of Heidi Cullinan. This was not a free book, just an early one!
Shameless plug for Heidi's Patreon site: become a patron--you get lots of goodies, and updates, and it's just really damned cool to be able to interact with one of your favorite authors.
Read
September 18, 2017
Uh... So, this book. I'm just weirded out. What started off as a mild cultural appropriation turned out to be this almost extreme fetishization that left me speechless quite a few times. I could understand it if one of the characters was actually Japanese or American-Japanese but they are two white dudes who think of the Japanese language as a way to turn themselves on. It felt objectified and overall wrong. I appreciate the way Heidi tried to slowly develop characters and show all of their characteristics to us but this way of writing also managed to create this bubble with only Skylar and Xander inside it which resulted in the not so good portrayal of the supporting characters. This brings me to Zelda and their portrayal which could've been way better. I can't really comment on the ace spectrum portrayal but I really do think that it could've been done way better and way more carefully. I feel like Heidi didn't exactly have any sensitivity readers because some of the serious points of this book went unnoticed when they should've been explained and generally talked about. Please do check out reviews of readers who are on the ace spectrum.
The positive side was art. I really loved how vivid the descriptions of Xander's artistic activites were and Skylar's admiration of it was really beautiful. Overall, I really feel like Heidi did not need this mess in her career.
August 8, 2017
I loved it!
Xander and Skylar are students at Benten College, which is heavily influenced by Japanese culture. Xander is an antisocial art student who needs help creating social media presence for promoting his senior exhibition. Skylar is a frat boy who decides his senior project will be to help Xander, after his frat is involved with a prank that destroyed on of Xander's mural.
They meet at the end of junior year and spend the summer together, working on their senior projects. During this time, they become close and fall in love. You also find out Skylar has been keeping secrets from everyone because he doesn't think anyone will accept his truths.
This is one of the best books with an asexual character I've ever read. I loved how they explored ways to make love, so that they were each satisfied. I loved the story itself, my eyes were constantly leaking, as I was often moved by these boys and their extended school family.
My only complaint is that I wish we knew how successful their senior projects turned out.
Highly recommended.
Xander and Skylar are students at Benten College, which is heavily influenced by Japanese culture. Xander is an antisocial art student who needs help creating social media presence for promoting his senior exhibition. Skylar is a frat boy who decides his senior project will be to help Xander, after his frat is involved with a prank that destroyed on of Xander's mural.
They meet at the end of junior year and spend the summer together, working on their senior projects. During this time, they become close and fall in love. You also find out Skylar has been keeping secrets from everyone because he doesn't think anyone will accept his truths.
This is one of the best books with an asexual character I've ever read. I loved how they explored ways to make love, so that they were each satisfied. I loved the story itself, my eyes were constantly leaking, as I was often moved by these boys and their extended school family.
My only complaint is that I wish we knew how successful their senior projects turned out.
Highly recommended.
September 2, 2017
While I did want to say something like "this book simply wasn't my thing" I'm afraid that it's more than just that.
Reading "Antisocial" made me extremely uncomfortable because of the way Japanese culture is being fetishized here, and I say that as a white person who loves Japan and has been there several times. I can even understand the temptation of an author to want to write about something she clearly likes but all her characters act like, well, like me the first couple of months after I discovered manga where everything seems just so exotic and exciting and different, and all you see is the surface. And if all her characters had been like that (meaning they just had discovered their interest in Japanese culture) I *maybe* could have stomached it, but one of them was married to a Japanese man for heaven's sake, and all she does is gush about blood types.
I'm not offended on behalf of Japanese people; that's not my place. They certainly don't need me get offended on behalf of them. I just expect better from a good writer than this.
If it had been a different author, maybe my reaction wouldn't be this strong. But I've read quite a few of Heidi Cullinan's novels and she can look behind the surface of things and not just perpetuate stereotypes. I'm fairly sure she doesn't mean any harm here; her enthusiasm for manga and anime comes across from what little I've read of her social media interaction and that's fine. But Japan is more than cherry blossoms and manga, and it's neat how in the end there's no mention of how people in Japan react to Skylar and Xander's marriage.
(The scenes where Xander is speaking Japanese to basically turn Skylar on were probably the most disturbing to me.)
Also, asexual or not, this didn't feel like a romance, more like a YA coming of age novel and I am so not the audience for that. (I don't feel like I can comment on the depiction of asexuality here since tbh I don't know that much about it. Edit: From reading reviews by people who know what they're talking about it looks like the ace rep is as problematic as the cultural appropriation.) But again, my personal preferences asides I think it wasn't as well done as in some of her other novels (most of which have elements of coming of age stories).
After the first half, I probably would have just said, oh well, it's just not my thing. But while the first half still had its merits despite the things I didn't like, the seconnd half was a mess. Never mind that Skylar and his relationship to his father felt like a rehash from her "Love Lessons" series, the final reveal there and what happens between Xander and his family felt random and pointless and not very realistic. It's possible I wouldn't have minded so much without the other aspects I had problems with, but it often felt like the book didn't have direction and in the end she tried to make sense of the muddle somehow.
I actually really wanted to like this because it's obvious how much this book means to her. But I really didn't, for the reasons mentioned above. Maybe it works better for people who don't know anything about Japan, I really couldn't say. But even if you take that away it wasn't a very good novel, in my opinion, and I would suggest rather reading something else. Some manga, perhaps, and preferably not some illegal scanlation (another red flag for me). Or some of Heidi Cullinan's other novels, some of which I really loved and some of which feature characters who like anime and don't venture into fetishizing it like this one does.
A free copy of the book was provided through NetGalley in exchange for a fair, unbiased review.
Reading "Antisocial" made me extremely uncomfortable because of the way Japanese culture is being fetishized here, and I say that as a white person who loves Japan and has been there several times. I can even understand the temptation of an author to want to write about something she clearly likes but all her characters act like, well, like me the first couple of months after I discovered manga where everything seems just so exotic and exciting and different, and all you see is the surface. And if all her characters had been like that (meaning they just had discovered their interest in Japanese culture) I *maybe* could have stomached it, but one of them was married to a Japanese man for heaven's sake, and all she does is gush about blood types.
I'm not offended on behalf of Japanese people; that's not my place. They certainly don't need me get offended on behalf of them. I just expect better from a good writer than this.
If it had been a different author, maybe my reaction wouldn't be this strong. But I've read quite a few of Heidi Cullinan's novels and she can look behind the surface of things and not just perpetuate stereotypes. I'm fairly sure she doesn't mean any harm here; her enthusiasm for manga and anime comes across from what little I've read of her social media interaction and that's fine. But Japan is more than cherry blossoms and manga, and it's neat how in the end there's no mention of how people in Japan react to Skylar and Xander's marriage.
(The scenes where Xander is speaking Japanese to basically turn Skylar on were probably the most disturbing to me.)
Also, asexual or not, this didn't feel like a romance, more like a YA coming of age novel and I am so not the audience for that. (I don't feel like I can comment on the depiction of asexuality here since tbh I don't know that much about it. Edit: From reading reviews by people who know what they're talking about it looks like the ace rep is as problematic as the cultural appropriation.) But again, my personal preferences asides I think it wasn't as well done as in some of her other novels (most of which have elements of coming of age stories).
After the first half, I probably would have just said, oh well, it's just not my thing. But while the first half still had its merits despite the things I didn't like, the seconnd half was a mess. Never mind that Skylar and his relationship to his father felt like a rehash from her "Love Lessons" series, the final reveal there and what happens between Xander and his family felt random and pointless and not very realistic. It's possible I wouldn't have minded so much without the other aspects I had problems with, but it often felt like the book didn't have direction and in the end she tried to make sense of the muddle somehow.
I actually really wanted to like this because it's obvious how much this book means to her. But I really didn't, for the reasons mentioned above. Maybe it works better for people who don't know anything about Japan, I really couldn't say. But even if you take that away it wasn't a very good novel, in my opinion, and I would suggest rather reading something else. Some manga, perhaps, and preferably not some illegal scanlation (another red flag for me). Or some of Heidi Cullinan's other novels, some of which I really loved and some of which feature characters who like anime and don't venture into fetishizing it like this one does.
A free copy of the book was provided through NetGalley in exchange for a fair, unbiased review.
August 9, 2017
Reviewed for Just Love. ARC received for an honest and fair review.
**Edited to 2 stars to match Goodreads' star-rating.
I was really torn about this book. I enjoyed the first half very much but could’ve easily skipped the second half entirely. So here’s what I loved and what I didn’t.
I adored the way Xander and Skylar’s relationship took root and blossomed so beautifully after their rocky start. Their interactions were so sweet and awkward and I alternated between grinning like a fool and sighing like an even bigger one as they slowly got to know each other. Between Skylar’s deep admiration for Xander’s artistry and Xander’s hopeless crush on the confident business major, their friendship eventually led to more and they found themselves spending an idyllic summer immersed in one another.
I enjoyed the aroace and gray spectrum rep in this book and I especially loved the way the two men explored their attraction with each other. The intimacy at times took my breath away and when you factor in how sensuous a simple touch of the hand could be for our two heroes, I may or may not have died several deaths during this book especially when they were out in public. Be it tender or playful, I enjoyed the many facets of their lovemaking and I really dug that Skylar, who was still exploring his gray spectrum sexuality, often played the seducer in the relationship. And Xander, so sharp and caustic and so, so shy… I seriously just wanted to cuddle them both, they were adorable together.
But moving on to the parts I didn’t like, which simply put, were the Japanese elements that overwhelmed the story. But before I get ahead of myself, let me clarify that I did enjoy parts of it at first. And let me also preface this by saying that as someone who’s been exposed to the culture from a young age including living with Japanese families in Japan, I get the fascination with all things Japanese, both modern and ancient. I get it, I really do.
I mean let’s face it, I pretty much pounced on this ARC just based on that gorgeous manga-like cover (I did read the blurb, I swear). And I loved the moments, especially when Xander and Skylar first started spending time together, that reminded me very much of scenes from anime (and not just because the subject kept popping up in their conversations). Perhaps it wouldn’t have bothered me as much if it was simply a matter of two young men bonding over Japanese manga and anime and falling in love. It made sense for Xander as a fine arts student and manga artist to know Japanese art history and to have even taken some language courses. And I loved that the serious, studious Skylar binged on anime as stress relief. I was even able to shrug off the “Japanese” history of the college and pass it off as quirky.
But as the story went on and more and more elements of Japanese culture were introduced, it definitely got weird for me, to the point where it felt forced and culturally appropriative. Alongside our two heroes, there was a whole group of side characters who were all obsessed with Japanese culture (barring perhaps Zelda, a kickass nonbinary aroace character). However not a single person was of actual Japanese descent. And no, the deceased husband of Xander’s landlady Pamela doesn’t count, even though she’d probably argue differently.
Around the halfway point, the story took an unexpected turn and by two-thirds of the way in, I felt that their romance had taken a backseat to everything else that was going on. I thought the sideplot with Skylar’s dad was crucial to his character development but Xander’s family woes felt unnecessary to the narrative. There were other things happening, both between the MCs and with the entire group, that I won’t go into here. But if the first half of the book focused on Skylar and Xander’s journey of self-discovery and sexual exploration, the second half was pretty much everyone’s journey to… well, you get three guesses. The story very much idealized (idolized?) Japanese culture, and Japan was presented as a wondrous land where all your problems were solved. So Japan was pretty much the equivalent of “magic dick.”
Antisocial was very obviously a labor of love by the author, and while I share some of this love, in the end the book was not for me. However, I would still recommend it based on the first half alone, which was easily 4.5 stars. But as a whole, it averages out to a 2-star** read for me.
**Edited to 2 stars to match Goodreads' star-rating.
I was really torn about this book. I enjoyed the first half very much but could’ve easily skipped the second half entirely. So here’s what I loved and what I didn’t.
I adored the way Xander and Skylar’s relationship took root and blossomed so beautifully after their rocky start. Their interactions were so sweet and awkward and I alternated between grinning like a fool and sighing like an even bigger one as they slowly got to know each other. Between Skylar’s deep admiration for Xander’s artistry and Xander’s hopeless crush on the confident business major, their friendship eventually led to more and they found themselves spending an idyllic summer immersed in one another.
I enjoyed the aroace and gray spectrum rep in this book and I especially loved the way the two men explored their attraction with each other. The intimacy at times took my breath away and when you factor in how sensuous a simple touch of the hand could be for our two heroes, I may or may not have died several deaths during this book especially when they were out in public. Be it tender or playful, I enjoyed the many facets of their lovemaking and I really dug that Skylar, who was still exploring his gray spectrum sexuality, often played the seducer in the relationship. And Xander, so sharp and caustic and so, so shy… I seriously just wanted to cuddle them both, they were adorable together.
But moving on to the parts I didn’t like, which simply put, were the Japanese elements that overwhelmed the story. But before I get ahead of myself, let me clarify that I did enjoy parts of it at first. And let me also preface this by saying that as someone who’s been exposed to the culture from a young age including living with Japanese families in Japan, I get the fascination with all things Japanese, both modern and ancient. I get it, I really do.
I mean let’s face it, I pretty much pounced on this ARC just based on that gorgeous manga-like cover (I did read the blurb, I swear). And I loved the moments, especially when Xander and Skylar first started spending time together, that reminded me very much of scenes from anime (and not just because the subject kept popping up in their conversations). Perhaps it wouldn’t have bothered me as much if it was simply a matter of two young men bonding over Japanese manga and anime and falling in love. It made sense for Xander as a fine arts student and manga artist to know Japanese art history and to have even taken some language courses. And I loved that the serious, studious Skylar binged on anime as stress relief. I was even able to shrug off the “Japanese” history of the college and pass it off as quirky.
But as the story went on and more and more elements of Japanese culture were introduced, it definitely got weird for me, to the point where it felt forced and culturally appropriative. Alongside our two heroes, there was a whole group of side characters who were all obsessed with Japanese culture (barring perhaps Zelda, a kickass nonbinary aroace character). However not a single person was of actual Japanese descent. And no, the deceased husband of Xander’s landlady Pamela doesn’t count, even though she’d probably argue differently.
Around the halfway point, the story took an unexpected turn and by two-thirds of the way in, I felt that their romance had taken a backseat to everything else that was going on. I thought the sideplot with Skylar’s dad was crucial to his character development but Xander’s family woes felt unnecessary to the narrative. There were other things happening, both between the MCs and with the entire group, that I won’t go into here. But if the first half of the book focused on Skylar and Xander’s journey of self-discovery and sexual exploration, the second half was pretty much everyone’s journey to… well, you get three guesses. The story very much idealized (idolized?) Japanese culture, and Japan was presented as a wondrous land where all your problems were solved. So Japan was pretty much the equivalent of “magic dick.”
Antisocial was very obviously a labor of love by the author, and while I share some of this love, in the end the book was not for me. However, I would still recommend it based on the first half alone, which was easily 4.5 stars. But as a whole, it averages out to a 2-star** read for me.
August 9, 2017
I was provided an ARC from the publisher via NetGalley in exchange for an honest review.
Also, it is still available from NetGalley until October. No approval required, just provide a review.
I don't even know where to begin with this review because there are so many things I want to say, so I guess I will just jump right in and see what comes out.
This book spoke to me in a BIG way. And I am not referring to any of the art or manga or shrines that played a part in this story. I am talking about Skylar & Xander. I identified with Skylar like I have no other character, and while we are not the same (I am in no way a social person), we share enough similarities that I felt a real connection. With Xander, our only similarity is in shyness. Xander is an introvert and an antisocial person - I completely get that. I prefer my own company to that of others, mostly because I like silence and doing what I want to do.
As unlikely as it is to find your perfect partner, when you add in all the nuances that make Skylar and Xander unique - it's even more amazing and perfectly romantic that they did indeed find each other. Out of all the billions of people there are on this planet, out of all the thousands of people who chose to attend Benten college, and out of those same thousands, for Xander's art to be graffitied upon by members of Skylar's fraternity - and for Skylar to be so mesmerized and enamored with said art - that these two should find each other is like Disney Fairy Tale Magic.
I was just struck by how well suited these two are and as implausible as their coming together is (because real life just doesn't always work out that way), I believed it. Author Heidi Cullinan really did an amazing job in bringing to life characters who don't match society's normative. I know this book will not be for everybody, but I hope people will still give it a chance. I was hesitant to read this myself because of the reviews I had read, it seemed the story was very Japanese centric and manga art (which I still don't 100% understand). And yes, those elements are in this story. But it's simply a means by which the characters communicate with each other. Xander's art and Skylar's love and appreciation of it is what brings them together.
This isn't a light and easy read, but I never felt weighed down with it. From the moment I started this to the last word on page, I was just engrossed in these characters and the world Heidi created. This book is different from anything else I've ever read and that is what is so amazing! I mean, how many different ways can you write boy meets boy (or someone meets someone)? There needs to be a special hook that makes a book different, and this one had it for me.
Depending on how you define intimacy, this book has loads of intimacy. No, there is no penetrative sex, but they have something so much deeper than that (and pun totally not intended). Skylar is a mix between asexual, demi sexual and bisexual - Skylar himself has no clear definition of what he is but he doesn't want a label beyond "Xander's Partner" anyway. Xander is gay, however painfully shy and a virgin. Neither are completely comfortable with the idea of sex (though Xander does have some good fantasies ;) ), and so they learn what the other is comfortable with - they talk, they set limits and they have some of the most meaningful encounters. I mean, holy cow! They made out in a car by just touching hands! That is sweet and on the surface intimate, but for these men - who've not been touched - it was everything.
I hope this isn't the end for Skylar and Xander - I would love to read more about them and what the future brings them. Their friends and family, sigh. Well, the friends are deeply loyal and at times I felt their Kumbaya, sis-boom-ba, rah-rah-rah attitude was a little over the top . I liked their friends: Zelda, Sara, Unc, Pamela - the list goes on. As for their family, Skylar's doesn't deserve the name, and Xander's mother is trying. I felt her to be a weak willed woman at first but she grew stronger as time went on.
The progression of Skylar from a well put together, clean cut and well groomed, calm and collected young man to a jittery, scruffy nervous young man was a surprise and I didn't feel the transition between them was smooth. It seemed to come from nowhere yet I could see signs of it coming. It's hard to explain. Skylar was suave and (this is going to sound dumb) Ken like. As Xander breaks down Skylar's walls and Skylar feels more and more pressure about the LSATs, wanting his fathers approval, his sexual identity is in chaos, his love for Xander, his future is unclear - Skylar's dependence on Xander grows and grows until Skylar can't seem to function without him. I don't understand how he became so...frail. I will think some more on this and maybe come back to say more.
Xander is sort of the complete opposite. Xander: the curmudgeon, the antisocial artist. He bloomed under Skylar's attention and friendship and then love. Xander has never really felt satisfaction or pride or the sense that he successfully created what his mind and spirit felt when it came to his art. But Skylar did and through him and his appreciation, Xander let go. He stopped thinking and just did it. The manga and the Japanese culture - all that went over my head - but I could still appreciate it in the way it made the characters shine.
I highly recommend everybody read this and really think about what this book is about. It's not always about sex, sometimes it's about intimacy. 4.75 stars.
Also, it is still available from NetGalley until October. No approval required, just provide a review.
I don't even know where to begin with this review because there are so many things I want to say, so I guess I will just jump right in and see what comes out.
This book spoke to me in a BIG way. And I am not referring to any of the art or manga or shrines that played a part in this story. I am talking about Skylar & Xander. I identified with Skylar like I have no other character, and while we are not the same (I am in no way a social person), we share enough similarities that I felt a real connection. With Xander, our only similarity is in shyness. Xander is an introvert and an antisocial person - I completely get that. I prefer my own company to that of others, mostly because I like silence and doing what I want to do.
As unlikely as it is to find your perfect partner, when you add in all the nuances that make Skylar and Xander unique - it's even more amazing and perfectly romantic that they did indeed find each other. Out of all the billions of people there are on this planet, out of all the thousands of people who chose to attend Benten college, and out of those same thousands, for Xander's art to be graffitied upon by members of Skylar's fraternity - and for Skylar to be so mesmerized and enamored with said art - that these two should find each other is like Disney Fairy Tale Magic.
I was just struck by how well suited these two are and as implausible as their coming together is (because real life just doesn't always work out that way), I believed it. Author Heidi Cullinan really did an amazing job in bringing to life characters who don't match society's normative. I know this book will not be for everybody, but I hope people will still give it a chance. I was hesitant to read this myself because of the reviews I had read, it seemed the story was very Japanese centric and manga art (which I still don't 100% understand). And yes, those elements are in this story. But it's simply a means by which the characters communicate with each other. Xander's art and Skylar's love and appreciation of it is what brings them together.
This isn't a light and easy read, but I never felt weighed down with it. From the moment I started this to the last word on page, I was just engrossed in these characters and the world Heidi created. This book is different from anything else I've ever read and that is what is so amazing! I mean, how many different ways can you write boy meets boy (or someone meets someone)? There needs to be a special hook that makes a book different, and this one had it for me.
Depending on how you define intimacy, this book has loads of intimacy. No, there is no penetrative sex, but they have something so much deeper than that (and pun totally not intended). Skylar is a mix between asexual, demi sexual and bisexual - Skylar himself has no clear definition of what he is but he doesn't want a label beyond "Xander's Partner" anyway. Xander is gay, however painfully shy and a virgin. Neither are completely comfortable with the idea of sex (though Xander does have some good fantasies ;) ), and so they learn what the other is comfortable with - they talk, they set limits and they have some of the most meaningful encounters. I mean, holy cow! They made out in a car by just touching hands! That is sweet and on the surface intimate, but for these men - who've not been touched - it was everything.
I hope this isn't the end for Skylar and Xander - I would love to read more about them and what the future brings them. Their friends and family, sigh. Well, the friends are deeply loyal and at times I felt their Kumbaya, sis-boom-ba, rah-rah-rah attitude was a little over the top . I liked their friends: Zelda, Sara, Unc, Pamela - the list goes on. As for their family, Skylar's doesn't deserve the name, and Xander's mother is trying. I felt her to be a weak willed woman at first but she grew stronger as time went on.
The progression of Skylar from a well put together, clean cut and well groomed, calm and collected young man to a jittery, scruffy nervous young man was a surprise and I didn't feel the transition between them was smooth. It seemed to come from nowhere yet I could see signs of it coming. It's hard to explain. Skylar was suave and (this is going to sound dumb) Ken like. As Xander breaks down Skylar's walls and Skylar feels more and more pressure about the LSATs, wanting his fathers approval, his sexual identity is in chaos, his love for Xander, his future is unclear - Skylar's dependence on Xander grows and grows until Skylar can't seem to function without him. I don't understand how he became so...frail. I will think some more on this and maybe come back to say more.
Xander is sort of the complete opposite. Xander: the curmudgeon, the antisocial artist. He bloomed under Skylar's attention and friendship and then love. Xander has never really felt satisfaction or pride or the sense that he successfully created what his mind and spirit felt when it came to his art. But Skylar did and through him and his appreciation, Xander let go. He stopped thinking and just did it. The manga and the Japanese culture - all that went over my head - but I could still appreciate it in the way it made the characters shine.
I highly recommend everybody read this and really think about what this book is about. It's not always about sex, sometimes it's about intimacy. 4.75 stars.
July 25, 2017
This was truly a beautiful story. I'm between 4 and 5 stars, but it was very enjoyable with some breathtaking imagery and unique characters that were so, so easy to love. And that's saying something, because in general, books featuring characters in college are a pass for me.
It's a long story, but Heidi Cullinan fills it with rich culture, wonderful character development, and sexual exploration that is intimate and sensual. If I have any complaints, it's that the ending felt rushed and . At times the characters' language felt a bit out of place to me, maybe too mature for their age (college, though they're nearly finished). Don't get me wrong, what they say is very insightful and poetic, but occasionally it felt a bit unrealistic and unnatural to me.
I can absolutely see that this story is a labor of love for the author, and it shines through in her writing.
It's a long story, but Heidi Cullinan fills it with rich culture, wonderful character development, and sexual exploration that is intimate and sensual. If I have any complaints, it's that the ending felt rushed and . At times the characters' language felt a bit out of place to me, maybe too mature for their age (college, though they're nearly finished). Don't get me wrong, what they say is very insightful and poetic, but occasionally it felt a bit unrealistic and unnatural to me.
I can absolutely see that this story is a labor of love for the author, and it shines through in her writing.
September 12, 2017
All of you need to read this book ASAP.
A huge thank you to Independent Book Publishers Association (IBPA) via Netgalley for allowing me to read this view in exchange for an honest review.
Xander and Skylar are now some of my favourite characters. I loved reading about them and getting to know them as only a reader could. Having read their story, I can honestly say that Antisocial has become one of my favourite novels.
To be quite honest with you, I was drawn to Antisocial because of the cover. I thought that there might have been some manga panels within the book, and I was curious to see it I was right. I wasn’t–thankfully. Another thing that drew me into checking out Antisocial was the mention of had to give this book a go. I’m so glad that I did!
Within Antisocial there are two points of view; Xander, and Skylar.
Xander is a artist in his early twenties, and he mostly keeps to himself most of the time.
Skylar is friendly and outgoing. Skylar is actually one of the few characters that are hard for me to describe; because how do you describe someone who is similar to yourself?
There isn’t much that I don’t like about the book, except the obviously rude characters. The ones that don’t care at all about some characters.
The rest of the book, however, is amazing, and I can’t even begin to tell you how much I love Antisocial.
Here are the things that I love about Antisocial:
There’s some vulgarity in this book (swearing/cursing), which I loved. I love that the expressions and such were accurate and used in the right context.
Halfway into the book I did the unexpected: I laughed. Laughing unexpectedly is always a great experience while you read a book.
There’s a lot of talk of consent in this book, which is a huge thing in general. I feel like not enough books talk about consent, and this needs to be seen more and more in books. Seriously, consent is so important and I rarely see talk about consent these days in the media.
There’s a non-binary person in this book and I love them! They’re such a great person. I love that this character was such a stickler. They acted like a protective guardian towards one character, and were then wary and guarded against another character. And then this character took another character for a drive and they opened up to one another and came back and they were friends. I just have so much love and respect for this character.
The romance is another thing that I didn’t really expect since I didn’t read too far into the synopsis for this book; aka, I didn’t really care that it was a Romance and pushed that out of my mind. That said, I love, love, love the romance in this novel. The romance is a enemy-turned-friends-turned-lovers, and its a slow burn romance at that *heart-eyes*. A+ on the romance, Cullinan!
Another thing that I absolutely loved reading about in Antisocial is the friendship that the two main characters have with the other characters. Zelda and Xander: great friendship. Unc/Jeff and Skylar have a great friendship as well. I could tell that it was a little rocky in the beginning. The fact that Jeff went out of his own way to make sure that Skylar was a good place when he needed to be, though? Gah. I LOVE THE FRIENDSHIPS. FRIENDSHIPS FOR EVERYONE!!!
The story line grows so much in this novel; it’s actually pretty crazy. I thought that maybe at one point the story had maybe flipped over to another book but it didn’t and wow. I thought that maybe Antisocial would be the kind of book that went “to get to point ‘b’ you have to get through point ‘a’.” Instead the book and story line goes in a few different ways while still maintaining what the synopsis led on about. And by the end of Antisocial everything was wrapped up as well — which is just mind boggling.
There is so much character growth. In everyone. There’s just so much that happens and everyone grows with each other, and yet they grow in their each individual ways. A++.
I love Pamela. I thought that maybe I wouldn’t like her, but by the end of the book I wrote down in my notes that old ladies are the best. And in this book, they are.
What I love most though, is that we get to see Xander and Skylar be vulnerable. Whether they’re being vulnerable with each other, or someone else, we see it happening, and the person they’re being vulnerable with isn’t mocking them.
I love that we got to see the good, the bad, the ugly and the beautiful with Xander and Skylar. And they are. Beautiful, I mean. Xander and Skylar are beautiful characters. I wish they were real so I could be best friends with them.
Everything about this book felt so real to me. None of it felt fake or used up. By the end of my reading Antisocial, I realized how humbled I was by Skylar and Xander. Their story is just so freaking heartwarming.
My final note on Antisocial is that the story is a little long in length, but so worth the read.
A huge thank you to Independent Book Publishers Association (IBPA) via Netgalley for allowing me to read this view in exchange for an honest review.
Xander and Skylar are now some of my favourite characters. I loved reading about them and getting to know them as only a reader could. Having read their story, I can honestly say that Antisocial has become one of my favourite novels.
To be quite honest with you, I was drawn to Antisocial because of the cover. I thought that there might have been some manga panels within the book, and I was curious to see it I was right. I wasn’t–thankfully. Another thing that drew me into checking out Antisocial was the mention of had to give this book a go. I’m so glad that I did!
Within Antisocial there are two points of view; Xander, and Skylar.
Xander is a artist in his early twenties, and he mostly keeps to himself most of the time.
Skylar is friendly and outgoing. Skylar is actually one of the few characters that are hard for me to describe; because how do you describe someone who is similar to yourself?
There isn’t much that I don’t like about the book, except the obviously rude characters. The ones that don’t care at all about some characters.
The rest of the book, however, is amazing, and I can’t even begin to tell you how much I love Antisocial.
Here are the things that I love about Antisocial:
There’s some vulgarity in this book (swearing/cursing), which I loved. I love that the expressions and such were accurate and used in the right context.
Halfway into the book I did the unexpected: I laughed. Laughing unexpectedly is always a great experience while you read a book.
There’s a lot of talk of consent in this book, which is a huge thing in general. I feel like not enough books talk about consent, and this needs to be seen more and more in books. Seriously, consent is so important and I rarely see talk about consent these days in the media.
There’s a non-binary person in this book and I love them! They’re such a great person. I love that this character was such a stickler. They acted like a protective guardian towards one character, and were then wary and guarded against another character. And then this character took another character for a drive and they opened up to one another and came back and they were friends. I just have so much love and respect for this character.
The romance is another thing that I didn’t really expect since I didn’t read too far into the synopsis for this book; aka, I didn’t really care that it was a Romance and pushed that out of my mind. That said, I love, love, love the romance in this novel. The romance is a enemy-turned-friends-turned-lovers, and its a slow burn romance at that *heart-eyes*. A+ on the romance, Cullinan!
Another thing that I absolutely loved reading about in Antisocial is the friendship that the two main characters have with the other characters. Zelda and Xander: great friendship. Unc/Jeff and Skylar have a great friendship as well. I could tell that it was a little rocky in the beginning. The fact that Jeff went out of his own way to make sure that Skylar was a good place when he needed to be, though? Gah. I LOVE THE FRIENDSHIPS. FRIENDSHIPS FOR EVERYONE!!!
The story line grows so much in this novel; it’s actually pretty crazy. I thought that maybe at one point the story had maybe flipped over to another book but it didn’t and wow. I thought that maybe Antisocial would be the kind of book that went “to get to point ‘b’ you have to get through point ‘a’.” Instead the book and story line goes in a few different ways while still maintaining what the synopsis led on about. And by the end of Antisocial everything was wrapped up as well — which is just mind boggling.
There is so much character growth. In everyone. There’s just so much that happens and everyone grows with each other, and yet they grow in their each individual ways. A++.
I love Pamela. I thought that maybe I wouldn’t like her, but by the end of the book I wrote down in my notes that old ladies are the best. And in this book, they are.
What I love most though, is that we get to see Xander and Skylar be vulnerable. Whether they’re being vulnerable with each other, or someone else, we see it happening, and the person they’re being vulnerable with isn’t mocking them.
I love that we got to see the good, the bad, the ugly and the beautiful with Xander and Skylar. And they are. Beautiful, I mean. Xander and Skylar are beautiful characters. I wish they were real so I could be best friends with them.
Everything about this book felt so real to me. None of it felt fake or used up. By the end of my reading Antisocial, I realized how humbled I was by Skylar and Xander. Their story is just so freaking heartwarming.
My final note on Antisocial is that the story is a little long in length, but so worth the read.
August 22, 2017
As Xan's review mentions, the allosexual (non-asexual) character in this book has some kind of "asexual spidey sense" that is so unrealistic and nonsensical, I rolled my eyes so hard that they almost got stuck in the back of my head.
Other reviews have covered the fact that this book fetishizes Japanese culture. I'll just say that this was especially uncomfortable for me to read because I, too, along with many of my friends, was an avid anime/manga fan as a teenager; I went to anime conventions and tried to learn Japanese. I know what it's like to be enthusiastic about another culture that is not your own, and yet for some reason, this book crosses the line from innocent enthusiasm into very pervasive fetishization, and it's extremely unsettling for me as to why the author consciously decided to write about Japanese culture with this lens.
I don't have the patience to finish this book right now, given its problems with asexuality and also fetishization of Japanese culture, so I'll just say that Xan does a very good job of laying out exactly why this book is not friendly to asexual-spectrum readers. This book takes the idea of the "Allo Savior" to the extreme in that the ace-spectrum character is filled with self-loathing about his asexuality until his allosexual love interest accepts him, and that is not an ace-positive narrative at all.
Other reviews have covered the fact that this book fetishizes Japanese culture. I'll just say that this was especially uncomfortable for me to read because I, too, along with many of my friends, was an avid anime/manga fan as a teenager; I went to anime conventions and tried to learn Japanese. I know what it's like to be enthusiastic about another culture that is not your own, and yet for some reason, this book crosses the line from innocent enthusiasm into very pervasive fetishization, and it's extremely unsettling for me as to why the author consciously decided to write about Japanese culture with this lens.
I don't have the patience to finish this book right now, given its problems with asexuality and also fetishization of Japanese culture, so I'll just say that Xan does a very good job of laying out exactly why this book is not friendly to asexual-spectrum readers. This book takes the idea of the "Allo Savior" to the extreme in that the ace-spectrum character is filled with self-loathing about his asexuality until his allosexual love interest accepts him, and that is not an ace-positive narrative at all.
January 16, 2019
I have no words
This story was AMAZING. I learned so much about asexuality as Skyler and Xander took me on a heartwarming journey through their love. So, so, so good. I may have to read it again understand the over and over again after that.
This story was AMAZING. I learned so much about asexuality as Skyler and Xander took me on a heartwarming journey through their love. So, so, so good. I may have to read it again understand the over and over again after that.
July 28, 2017
So! This book is unlike anything that I've ever read before, and I sat on it for a few days before reviewing it.
First and foremost, Skylar is gray sexual, meaning he is on the spectrum between asexual and sexual. He isn't full blown asexual, neither is he full blown sexual; for example, the mere idea of a lot of sex acts that one would simply assume are going to happen in M/M romance (the ever-present blow job, anyone?) make Skylar uncomfortable. So if anyone is looking for either a full on sexual or asexual romance, this book probably isn't going to cut it. However, I would like to say that Cullinan handled the issue with incredible skill and tact, so even if a gray sexual book isn't what you are used to, that doesn't mean you won't enjoy this book. Although I must admit I was a little weirded out that everyone knew what all these different terms meant without any explanation. I was all, "Wow, does Benten have a class on this or something?"
Second, the whole Japan issue. I do feel that this book will be most enjoyed by people who have an interest in Japan, Japanese, anime, and manga, if for no other reason than a lot of reference is made to these things. Like, all of a sudden one of the characters was watching Crunchyroll and no one ever really explained what that was (hint: online anime streaming service). I knew what it was because I, too, watch Crunchyroll, but it would have lost something if I hadn't known what it was. Plus, some manga names were dropped in, sometimes Japanese words were dropped in (usually with explanations, but not always), and all in all the whole thing felt very Japanese-fan-oriented.
But, to be honest, I felt like the characters idealized Japan more than was healthy. As someone who has been to Japan, who has made serious attempts to learn Japanese (Jesus Christ, Xander could read Japanese manga after two years?! Jealous!) and has been seriously interested in Japanese culture for over a decade, I worry that their enchantment with all things Japanese is going to get them in trouble. It's like . . . I love Japanese things and I love Japan and that doesn't stop Japan from having a horrible time with racism and a horrible time with suicide rates and a horrible time with demanding absolute perfection from their populace (see the suicide rate) and . . . okay, I'm going to try to not turn this into an essay. But seriously, the cherry blossoms are not necessarily more beautiful in Japan (to kind of steal from the book).
All of this feels kind of negative, but I really did enjoy the book. Part of it was that it was nice to see characters who weren't typically on the spectrum in regards to sexuality (gray spectrum) not just be secondary characters, and for them to explore their sexuality in a way that was fulfilling and satisfying to them. It was also nice to see them get a happy ending of their very own. Another part of it was watching the characters find their own footing, independent of their parents and family of origin. I also really liked seeing how being born into a privileged background doesn't stop one from being oppressed; in a lot of stories, the story will kind of say this but it doesn't come across, and in Antisocial it really came across that Skylar was still getting a raw deal.
I received a copy of this book from NetGalley.
First and foremost, Skylar is gray sexual, meaning he is on the spectrum between asexual and sexual. He isn't full blown asexual, neither is he full blown sexual; for example, the mere idea of a lot of sex acts that one would simply assume are going to happen in M/M romance (the ever-present blow job, anyone?) make Skylar uncomfortable. So if anyone is looking for either a full on sexual or asexual romance, this book probably isn't going to cut it. However, I would like to say that Cullinan handled the issue with incredible skill and tact, so even if a gray sexual book isn't what you are used to, that doesn't mean you won't enjoy this book. Although I must admit I was a little weirded out that everyone knew what all these different terms meant without any explanation. I was all, "Wow, does Benten have a class on this or something?"
Second, the whole Japan issue. I do feel that this book will be most enjoyed by people who have an interest in Japan, Japanese, anime, and manga, if for no other reason than a lot of reference is made to these things. Like, all of a sudden one of the characters was watching Crunchyroll and no one ever really explained what that was (hint: online anime streaming service). I knew what it was because I, too, watch Crunchyroll, but it would have lost something if I hadn't known what it was. Plus, some manga names were dropped in, sometimes Japanese words were dropped in (usually with explanations, but not always), and all in all the whole thing felt very Japanese-fan-oriented.
But, to be honest, I felt like the characters idealized Japan more than was healthy. As someone who has been to Japan, who has made serious attempts to learn Japanese (Jesus Christ, Xander could read Japanese manga after two years?! Jealous!) and has been seriously interested in Japanese culture for over a decade, I worry that their enchantment with all things Japanese is going to get them in trouble. It's like . . . I love Japanese things and I love Japan and that doesn't stop Japan from having a horrible time with racism and a horrible time with suicide rates and a horrible time with demanding absolute perfection from their populace (see the suicide rate) and . . . okay, I'm going to try to not turn this into an essay. But seriously, the cherry blossoms are not necessarily more beautiful in Japan (to kind of steal from the book).
All of this feels kind of negative, but I really did enjoy the book. Part of it was that it was nice to see characters who weren't typically on the spectrum in regards to sexuality (gray spectrum) not just be secondary characters, and for them to explore their sexuality in a way that was fulfilling and satisfying to them. It was also nice to see them get a happy ending of their very own. Another part of it was watching the characters find their own footing, independent of their parents and family of origin. I also really liked seeing how being born into a privileged background doesn't stop one from being oppressed; in a lot of stories, the story will kind of say this but it doesn't come across, and in Antisocial it really came across that Skylar was still getting a raw deal.
I received a copy of this book from NetGalley.
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August 9, 2017Review originally posted at Sinfully.
3.5 stars
Xander Fairchild is the “antisocial” artist, whose work was destroyed by a bunch of fratboys. Skylar “Silver” Stone is the risk officer of the frat who is trying to make amends. Xander is both attracted and repelled by the douchey fratboy and Skylar is enamored by one of Xander’s pieces of art. But when Skylar seems to really get it, what Xander put into the piece, that freaks Xander even more. Walking away from the less than successful meeting, Skylar is entranced by the painting he now owns. The cranky Xander thinks it’s trash but the painting calls to Skylar who sees himself in the angry strokes of color. When they are put together to work on Xander’s senior project they soon find that there is more to both of them than the either ever could have imagined. Shared interests are unearthed and plans chanbe as Skylar begins to pry Xander out of his shell to market him and Xander opens cracks in the phony “Silver Stone” veneer that was already so fragile.
Both Skylar and Xander have pretty horrible families, but Skylar’s are a bigger part of the story. Skylar is still working hard for any shred of appreciation from his father, while his mother just isn’t even there to bother with. Xander has distanced himself from his family. Xander’s mother makes some effort and clearly loves him, but caters to her husband and other kids, allowing Xander’s step-father to treat him as less of a member of the family than his blood children. Xander is hurt but brushes it aside, while Skylar is slowly cracking under the pressure. These are just some of the outside troubles that threaten the deeper emotional bond that is forming.
This was a tough review for me. On the one hand, the relationship between Xander and Skylar deserves all the stars I can give. On the other, the uneven pacing and aspects of the surrounding plot and setting, especially towards the middle and end, slowed things down and occasionally had me skimming.
I absolutely adored Xander and Skylar. The way Heidi Cullinan developed their relationship from antagonistic, to grudgingly friendly to lovers was well paced. When the two begin to explore the romantic and physical sides of their attraction, it was handled delicately and sensitively with both boys being honest about their fears, needs, wants and experience. Xander has had no experience, but considers himself gay while Skylar is in a gray area of the asexual spectrum, unsure of how he would define his sexuality and uncomfortable with labels. Skylar is also having trouble with the way he has been presenting himself publicly and his continued efforts to gain some attention from the father that just wants him to fit into the mold and walk the path that he drew for Skylar to follow. While there are no sex scenes, there are some very sensual and erotic love scenes that were very creative and really fit well with the characters and the unique way they find to express their feelings. There is one scene of body painting in particular that was emotionally cathartic for them and brought a tear to my eye. I’m no expert, but I have enjoyed reading more characters on the ace spectrum in stories recently and I really enjoyed the exploration of the ace spectrum and the diversity of sexualities portrayed here.
There was actually quite a lot going on in this story – hidden shrines, writing manga, working on senior projects, fraternity problems, school problems, family conflict on both men’s parts – all on top of the relationship story. I sometimes felt I was being pulled in a lot of directions with storylines that weren’t all fully rounded out. Nods to Japanese culture are pervasive in the story. I have very little experience with manga and anime, but I found those parts of the book easy to follow (and that cover is absolutely stunning). I especially loved the scenes where Xander used Skylar as a model for his manga-style artwork. There were a lot of Japanese cultural references and stories to take in and keep track of and that sometimes slowed the pace and had me skimming.
There are also many secondary characters with Skylar’s best friend Unc and Xander’s friend Zelda two of the more prominent ones. Unc is another fratboy who is so much more than he appears to be and I absolutely adored him. Zelda, on the other hand is the type of friend that personally, I usually don’t enjoy reading – the overly aggressive, you can’t take care of yourself so I’ll be up in your business regardless of what you want, friend. They spent most of the book glaring from the corner but they did come through big time in helping Skylar deal with what he was feeling and in that moment they made a good impression.
Heidi Cullinan writes New Adult stories very well and I think fans of her Love Lessons series in particular will enjoy this story. The relationship aspects were amazing. Any time Xander and Skylar were on page together I was enthralled. Unfortunately there were too many other parts of the story that pulled my focus away from the main plot. Although it was a bit uneven for me, I would recommend it to New Adult fans who are looking to explore a different type of love story with a patented Heidi Cullinan HEA.
3.5 stars
Xander Fairchild is the “antisocial” artist, whose work was destroyed by a bunch of fratboys. Skylar “Silver” Stone is the risk officer of the frat who is trying to make amends. Xander is both attracted and repelled by the douchey fratboy and Skylar is enamored by one of Xander’s pieces of art. But when Skylar seems to really get it, what Xander put into the piece, that freaks Xander even more. Walking away from the less than successful meeting, Skylar is entranced by the painting he now owns. The cranky Xander thinks it’s trash but the painting calls to Skylar who sees himself in the angry strokes of color. When they are put together to work on Xander’s senior project they soon find that there is more to both of them than the either ever could have imagined. Shared interests are unearthed and plans chanbe as Skylar begins to pry Xander out of his shell to market him and Xander opens cracks in the phony “Silver Stone” veneer that was already so fragile.
Both Skylar and Xander have pretty horrible families, but Skylar’s are a bigger part of the story. Skylar is still working hard for any shred of appreciation from his father, while his mother just isn’t even there to bother with. Xander has distanced himself from his family. Xander’s mother makes some effort and clearly loves him, but caters to her husband and other kids, allowing Xander’s step-father to treat him as less of a member of the family than his blood children. Xander is hurt but brushes it aside, while Skylar is slowly cracking under the pressure. These are just some of the outside troubles that threaten the deeper emotional bond that is forming.
This was a tough review for me. On the one hand, the relationship between Xander and Skylar deserves all the stars I can give. On the other, the uneven pacing and aspects of the surrounding plot and setting, especially towards the middle and end, slowed things down and occasionally had me skimming.
I absolutely adored Xander and Skylar. The way Heidi Cullinan developed their relationship from antagonistic, to grudgingly friendly to lovers was well paced. When the two begin to explore the romantic and physical sides of their attraction, it was handled delicately and sensitively with both boys being honest about their fears, needs, wants and experience. Xander has had no experience, but considers himself gay while Skylar is in a gray area of the asexual spectrum, unsure of how he would define his sexuality and uncomfortable with labels. Skylar is also having trouble with the way he has been presenting himself publicly and his continued efforts to gain some attention from the father that just wants him to fit into the mold and walk the path that he drew for Skylar to follow. While there are no sex scenes, there are some very sensual and erotic love scenes that were very creative and really fit well with the characters and the unique way they find to express their feelings. There is one scene of body painting in particular that was emotionally cathartic for them and brought a tear to my eye. I’m no expert, but I have enjoyed reading more characters on the ace spectrum in stories recently and I really enjoyed the exploration of the ace spectrum and the diversity of sexualities portrayed here.
There was actually quite a lot going on in this story – hidden shrines, writing manga, working on senior projects, fraternity problems, school problems, family conflict on both men’s parts – all on top of the relationship story. I sometimes felt I was being pulled in a lot of directions with storylines that weren’t all fully rounded out. Nods to Japanese culture are pervasive in the story. I have very little experience with manga and anime, but I found those parts of the book easy to follow (and that cover is absolutely stunning). I especially loved the scenes where Xander used Skylar as a model for his manga-style artwork. There were a lot of Japanese cultural references and stories to take in and keep track of and that sometimes slowed the pace and had me skimming.
There are also many secondary characters with Skylar’s best friend Unc and Xander’s friend Zelda two of the more prominent ones. Unc is another fratboy who is so much more than he appears to be and I absolutely adored him. Zelda, on the other hand is the type of friend that personally, I usually don’t enjoy reading – the overly aggressive, you can’t take care of yourself so I’ll be up in your business regardless of what you want, friend. They spent most of the book glaring from the corner but they did come through big time in helping Skylar deal with what he was feeling and in that moment they made a good impression.
Heidi Cullinan writes New Adult stories very well and I think fans of her Love Lessons series in particular will enjoy this story. The relationship aspects were amazing. Any time Xander and Skylar were on page together I was enthralled. Unfortunately there were too many other parts of the story that pulled my focus away from the main plot. Although it was a bit uneven for me, I would recommend it to New Adult fans who are looking to explore a different type of love story with a patented Heidi Cullinan HEA.
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