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Forgiveness: Finding Peace Through Letting Go
"If your enemies are starving, feed them some bread; if they are thirsty, give them water to drink." Proverbs 24:17 (CEB)
There is nothing more crippling than holding on to anger. Anger, more than any other emotion, has the power to consume all aspects of our lives, distort our sense of purpose, and destroy our relationship with God.
In the passionate and life-changing book Finding Peace Though Letting Go , bestselling author Adam Hamilton brings the same insight that he applied in the bestseller "Why?" to the challenge of forgiveness. Hamilton argues that revelation comes when we realize that forgiveness is a gift we give ourselves rather than to someone else. He also contends that only when we learn to forgive others and ourselves can we truly receive forgiveness from God.
“Adam Hamilton not only reminds us about the importance of reconnecting the broken pieces of our lives, but shows how the process of grace and forgiveness is possibly our most complete picture of God.”
--Shane Stanford, author of Making Life Embracing the Joy in the Everyday
“The heartbeat of the gospel is grace. With practical insight, Hamilton makes grace understandable--both for seeking and for granting forgiveness. I highly recommend this book.”
--Melody Carlson, author of Healing A Bible Study on Forgiveness, Grace, and Second Chances
“Adam Hamilton’s book offers clear guidance for believers struggling with the practical application of our biblical imperative to forgive. It is a must-read for both Christian counselors and every person who has something or someone to forgive.”
--Jennifer Cisney Ellers, author of The First 48 Spiritual Caregivers as First Responders
"Deeply rooted in the Bible’s testimony about God’s extravagant mercy, this fine little book explores the Christian call to practice both repentance and forgiveness in the image of God. Straightforward and practical, Hamilton vividly sketches the habits of the heart that discipleship requires in our daily relationships with spouses and intimate life partners, family members, friends and strangers."
--Patricia Beattie Jung, Professor of Christian Ethics, Saint Paul School of Theology
There is nothing more crippling than holding on to anger. Anger, more than any other emotion, has the power to consume all aspects of our lives, distort our sense of purpose, and destroy our relationship with God.
In the passionate and life-changing book Finding Peace Though Letting Go , bestselling author Adam Hamilton brings the same insight that he applied in the bestseller "Why?" to the challenge of forgiveness. Hamilton argues that revelation comes when we realize that forgiveness is a gift we give ourselves rather than to someone else. He also contends that only when we learn to forgive others and ourselves can we truly receive forgiveness from God.
“Adam Hamilton not only reminds us about the importance of reconnecting the broken pieces of our lives, but shows how the process of grace and forgiveness is possibly our most complete picture of God.”
--Shane Stanford, author of Making Life Embracing the Joy in the Everyday
“The heartbeat of the gospel is grace. With practical insight, Hamilton makes grace understandable--both for seeking and for granting forgiveness. I highly recommend this book.”
--Melody Carlson, author of Healing A Bible Study on Forgiveness, Grace, and Second Chances
“Adam Hamilton’s book offers clear guidance for believers struggling with the practical application of our biblical imperative to forgive. It is a must-read for both Christian counselors and every person who has something or someone to forgive.”
--Jennifer Cisney Ellers, author of The First 48 Spiritual Caregivers as First Responders
"Deeply rooted in the Bible’s testimony about God’s extravagant mercy, this fine little book explores the Christian call to practice both repentance and forgiveness in the image of God. Straightforward and practical, Hamilton vividly sketches the habits of the heart that discipleship requires in our daily relationships with spouses and intimate life partners, family members, friends and strangers."
--Patricia Beattie Jung, Professor of Christian Ethics, Saint Paul School of Theology
160 pages, Paperback
First published August 1, 2012
86 people are currently reading
330 people want to read
About the author
Adam Hamilton
299 books287 followersRev. Adam Hamilton is the founding pastor of the United Methodist Church of the Resurrection in Leawood, Kansas. He grew up in the Kansas City area. He earned a B.A. degree in Pastoral Ministry from Oral Roberts University and a Master of Divinity Degree from Perkins School of Theology at Southern Methodist University.
The United Methodist Church of the Resurrection has grown from four people in 1990 to more than 16,000 adult members with an average weekly worship attendance of more than 8,600 in 2011. The church was listed as the most influential mainline church in America in a 2005 survey of American pastors.
Adam has been married 30 years to LaVon. They have two grown daughters.
The United Methodist Church of the Resurrection has grown from four people in 1990 to more than 16,000 adult members with an average weekly worship attendance of more than 8,600 in 2011. The church was listed as the most influential mainline church in America in a 2005 survey of American pastors.
Adam has been married 30 years to LaVon. They have two grown daughters.
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 48 reviews
September 14, 2014
Honestly, I can’t remember where I heard about FORGIVENESS, FINDING PEACE THROUGH LETTING GO by ADAM HAMILTON. If I had to guess, I would say it was a recommendation in another book I read.
Don’t let the size of FORGIVNESS fool you. It’s packed with great information. Most of my copy is highlighted, underlined, notes written within, and pages dog-eared. I copied a few pages to share with others. They were so intrigued, they purchased the book themselves.
Some of my favorite gems within the pages:
“Forgiveness is believing that the future can be better than the past. The past can’t be changed, but God can do something redemptive with it.” Page 122
“You can choose to harm everyone because you were hurt, or you can choose to harm no one because you were hurt. Either way, it’s a choice.” Page 123
I loved the whole concept, “Just RAP: REMEMBER your own shortcomings, ASSUME the best of people, and PRAY for them.” Page 76
I could go on and on in what I gained from reading FORGIVENSS. I highly recommend this amazing little book for everyone. None of us has escaped being hurt by someone at one time or another in our lives, or hurting another, whether knowing or unknowing.
I hope that one day MR. HAMILTON’s book will be available in soft cover, so I can share it with those through the prison ministry I’m involved in. Don’t miss out on this book that will help to change your life for the better. I will definitely be seeking out more books by ADAM HAMILTON.
Don’t let the size of FORGIVNESS fool you. It’s packed with great information. Most of my copy is highlighted, underlined, notes written within, and pages dog-eared. I copied a few pages to share with others. They were so intrigued, they purchased the book themselves.
Some of my favorite gems within the pages:
“Forgiveness is believing that the future can be better than the past. The past can’t be changed, but God can do something redemptive with it.” Page 122
“You can choose to harm everyone because you were hurt, or you can choose to harm no one because you were hurt. Either way, it’s a choice.” Page 123
I loved the whole concept, “Just RAP: REMEMBER your own shortcomings, ASSUME the best of people, and PRAY for them.” Page 76
I could go on and on in what I gained from reading FORGIVENSS. I highly recommend this amazing little book for everyone. None of us has escaped being hurt by someone at one time or another in our lives, or hurting another, whether knowing or unknowing.
I hope that one day MR. HAMILTON’s book will be available in soft cover, so I can share it with those through the prison ministry I’m involved in. Don’t miss out on this book that will help to change your life for the better. I will definitely be seeking out more books by ADAM HAMILTON.
June 19, 2020
Hamilton addresses one of the core doctrines and practices of Christianity. He is absolutely correct about the importance of forgiveness. His theology, however, shows a pragmatic foundation that is troubling. It seems like his theological method is to take whatever position works in the moment, whether it is biblical or godly or correct. For example, while discussing Jesus’s teaching that forgiveness is non-optional and should be applied to every sin (we forgive seventy times seven times), Hamilton says that there are times we shouldn’t forgive. Which is it? Should we always forgive or maybe not always if the sin is especially bad? There are indeed times when forgiveness is difficult and even apparently counter intuitive, but the command is clear. It also seemed strange that Hamilton ignored the teaching of forgiveness in the Lord’s Prayer and Jesus’s admonition that if we don’t forgive then God won’t forgive us (of course then the “O we shouldn’t always forgive” parts of his teaching would then be undermined). There is good in this book, but there are more faithful books on forgiveness available.
July 9, 2025
Forgiveness is powerful- when we receive it and when we give it.
High points:
Does forgiveness dismiss consequences? NO: Actions have consequences. I choose not to retaliate.
Edit (add): I choose to accept the consequences of my actions and practice replacement behaviors.
Don’t wait to ask for or give forgiveness. Go start a conversation and let God’s mercy work.
High points:
Does forgiveness dismiss consequences? NO: Actions have consequences. I choose not to retaliate.
Edit (add): I choose to accept the consequences of my actions and practice replacement behaviors.
Don’t wait to ask for or give forgiveness. Go start a conversation and let God’s mercy work.
November 20, 2019
It was.. bland. Straightforward and rather.. blah. I was disappointed. How do you make the topic of forgiveness bland??? It’s radically life-giving! Unfortunately, Hamilton succeeds at the former and fails at the latter.
February 5, 2020
When I think of forgiveness, I think of forgiving others, moving on and let what it is, be. But often times, we forget that we must also forgive ourselves. It’s okay to ask for forgivenesses & to be renewed. Compassion, kindness, mindfulness are just a few points discussed.
June 17, 2020
The language and analogies in this book make it easy to absorb and understand. In my opinion, almost anyone could read this and apply a lot of it to their lives. The way the author explains things really speaks to my soul.
November 8, 2022
I do not agree with some of Hamilton’s applications of specific Scriptures, but I think the overall urgency to move toward forgiveness and the use of a constant analogy throughout this short book are helpful images for the reader.
September 8, 2024
Forgiveness is an important topic we all need to consider. I didn’t feel as though the book did it just. Not at in-depth as I would’ve liked. Very bland. Some may find it helpful. I was looking for something more.
July 3, 2017
Very good. Deals with both the theoretical as well as the practical.
January 19, 2019
Compassionate, eye opening, beautifully written.
August 14, 2019
Thoughtful reading
This book would be an excellent small group resource. It is set in such a way, with reflective questions, to do so.
This book would be an excellent small group resource. It is set in such a way, with reflective questions, to do so.
November 18, 2019
Tough topic
Depends on your mindset how you react to his thoughts and suggestions.
Depends on your mindset how you react to his thoughts and suggestions.
March 3, 2020
This book is full of great visuals to help us understand how failing to forgive stands between a loving relationship.
May 3, 2021
Solid teaching on scripture-based forgiveness.
November 29, 2021
It's more focused on marriage than I expected. I listened to it and would probably benefit more from having read it. Some good insights.
December 8, 2021
Seemed more specific for forgiveness in marriage but still some good words of wisdom throughout.
Read
October 2, 2022A class study series .
February 10, 2023
Adam Hamilton books are always great and Forgiveness was one of church groups favorites.
June 2, 2024
Perfectly fine.
I wish Goodreads let you do 1/2 star reviews. This is a 3.5.
Part of my "entry to..." I'm doing with various topics. Definitely had some good points.
I wish Goodreads let you do 1/2 star reviews. This is a 3.5.
Part of my "entry to..." I'm doing with various topics. Definitely had some good points.
December 19, 2013
It is impossible to walk through this life without hurting someone or being hurt by someone. God, of course, knows this fact, which explains why he chose to teach us in his word about forgiveness. Adam Hamilton, senior pastor of the United Methodist Church of the Resurrection in Leawood, Kansas and author of several books, has taken a stab at the important topic of helping Christians understand forgiveness in simple terms in his book appropriately titled Forgiveness.
Positives
Hamilton’s work is sweet, simple, and full of application. He illustrates often, depicting carrying the burden of anger like a backpack full of stones. Nothing in this work is too complex for believers to easily grasp and immediately apply.
One example of the helpful counsel the author offers is in the acronym R.A.P. Whenever we find ourselves offended by something that another person does that is not really significant, Hamilton suggest we (R) remember that we have probably done something similar in our own lives, (A) assume the best about the person who offended us, and (P) pray for the person who has offended us. IF we will practice this simple plan, we will find it much easier to let go of simple annoyances before they become big problems.
Hamilton also does a fine job with his explanation of the concept of repentance. The author grasps that repentance is more than mere change. Instead, he presents the truly biblical understanding of repentance as a change of mind which leads to sorrow and a change of action.
Negatives
I found that the book may have relied a bit more heavily on psychological theory than I would have preferred. An example of this comes in the premise that we forgive in order to free ourselves of burdens, regardless of the actions of others. The author does not back this teaching with a solidly biblical foundation, thus leaving it open to question whether this principle is truly in Scripture or merely in modern therapy. Understand that I’m not arguing that the author is wrong here (it is often experientially true that we feel a release when we forgive and there is also an appropriate way in which we let go of our anger against others before God that is clearly biblical), but simply that I would have liked a more Scripture-driven approach rather than an approach founded in psychology. Since the need to forgive has been present since Adam and Eve, the authors of Scripture and the God who inspired it obviously knew the topic well. Why, then, can we not find letting go for one’s own emotional release as a Scriptural motivation for forgiveness? This leaves me wondering if there is not something missing.
Similarly, the author points out that it is often important to confront those who have sinned against us. However, he does not share with us much about when we can then complete the transaction of forgiveness. I would have liked to find more in this work about the hard question of what to do when a person sins against another and yet refuses to acknowledge it or repent.
Conclusion
Hamilton’s work is a nice, short, and easy read on a topic that is of great importance to Christians. In many ways, the book is helpful. Obviously, a book of this size will not be able to cover every contingency and will not be an exhaustive theological look at the topic. For those looking for a quick peek at the topic of forgiveness, this book has points to recommend it. However, in general I would send readers elsewhere if they really want to dig into the topic. Specifically, I would recommend Chris Brauns, Unpacking Forgiveness: Biblical Answers for Complex Questions and Deep Wounds (Wheaton: Crossway, 2008).
Audio
As part of their reviewers program, I received a free audio version of this book from ChristianAudio.com in exchange for an honest review. The audio quality of this work, like all the products from this company, was quite solid.
Positives
Hamilton’s work is sweet, simple, and full of application. He illustrates often, depicting carrying the burden of anger like a backpack full of stones. Nothing in this work is too complex for believers to easily grasp and immediately apply.
One example of the helpful counsel the author offers is in the acronym R.A.P. Whenever we find ourselves offended by something that another person does that is not really significant, Hamilton suggest we (R) remember that we have probably done something similar in our own lives, (A) assume the best about the person who offended us, and (P) pray for the person who has offended us. IF we will practice this simple plan, we will find it much easier to let go of simple annoyances before they become big problems.
Hamilton also does a fine job with his explanation of the concept of repentance. The author grasps that repentance is more than mere change. Instead, he presents the truly biblical understanding of repentance as a change of mind which leads to sorrow and a change of action.
Negatives
I found that the book may have relied a bit more heavily on psychological theory than I would have preferred. An example of this comes in the premise that we forgive in order to free ourselves of burdens, regardless of the actions of others. The author does not back this teaching with a solidly biblical foundation, thus leaving it open to question whether this principle is truly in Scripture or merely in modern therapy. Understand that I’m not arguing that the author is wrong here (it is often experientially true that we feel a release when we forgive and there is also an appropriate way in which we let go of our anger against others before God that is clearly biblical), but simply that I would have liked a more Scripture-driven approach rather than an approach founded in psychology. Since the need to forgive has been present since Adam and Eve, the authors of Scripture and the God who inspired it obviously knew the topic well. Why, then, can we not find letting go for one’s own emotional release as a Scriptural motivation for forgiveness? This leaves me wondering if there is not something missing.
Similarly, the author points out that it is often important to confront those who have sinned against us. However, he does not share with us much about when we can then complete the transaction of forgiveness. I would have liked to find more in this work about the hard question of what to do when a person sins against another and yet refuses to acknowledge it or repent.
Conclusion
Hamilton’s work is a nice, short, and easy read on a topic that is of great importance to Christians. In many ways, the book is helpful. Obviously, a book of this size will not be able to cover every contingency and will not be an exhaustive theological look at the topic. For those looking for a quick peek at the topic of forgiveness, this book has points to recommend it. However, in general I would send readers elsewhere if they really want to dig into the topic. Specifically, I would recommend Chris Brauns, Unpacking Forgiveness: Biblical Answers for Complex Questions and Deep Wounds (Wheaton: Crossway, 2008).
Audio
As part of their reviewers program, I received a free audio version of this book from ChristianAudio.com in exchange for an honest review. The audio quality of this work, like all the products from this company, was quite solid.
August 17, 2012
I received this book courtesy of Christian Audio for the purpose of reviewing and promoting this book.
I was so excited to begin my reviews for Christian Audio. I love audiobooks and spiritual books. This is the best of all worlds.
Narrator thoughts –
I like this narrator. He has a very clear distinct voice. Some narrators just show up and say the words and you can tell that in their voice. This narrator sounded like he tried to put himself in the authors shoes and read from the authors point of view.This added a great dimension to the audiobook.
Book thoughts –
As far as the book went, I liked that he described forgiveness as a process. Some people make forgiveness sound so easy and fast. I appreciated the Adam Hamilton’s advice on how to reconcile relationships and restore peace. It’s not a one size fits all process, it’s God working in us that brings about forgiveness. “True forgiveness happens when we accept the truth of God’s forgiveness for us. Only then can we forgive others.” This is my favorite quote from the book. One of the other things I like is that he emphasized prayer in every situation and getting personal help. I liked that he didn’t try to fix everyone’s problems, but tried to help you toward forgiveness.
For more on Forgiveness and other great audiobooks go to http://christianaudio.com/forgiveness...
I was so excited to begin my reviews for Christian Audio. I love audiobooks and spiritual books. This is the best of all worlds.
Narrator thoughts –
I like this narrator. He has a very clear distinct voice. Some narrators just show up and say the words and you can tell that in their voice. This narrator sounded like he tried to put himself in the authors shoes and read from the authors point of view.This added a great dimension to the audiobook.
Book thoughts –
As far as the book went, I liked that he described forgiveness as a process. Some people make forgiveness sound so easy and fast. I appreciated the Adam Hamilton’s advice on how to reconcile relationships and restore peace. It’s not a one size fits all process, it’s God working in us that brings about forgiveness. “True forgiveness happens when we accept the truth of God’s forgiveness for us. Only then can we forgive others.” This is my favorite quote from the book. One of the other things I like is that he emphasized prayer in every situation and getting personal help. I liked that he didn’t try to fix everyone’s problems, but tried to help you toward forgiveness.
For more on Forgiveness and other great audiobooks go to http://christianaudio.com/forgiveness...
February 11, 2017
We all must find the power to forgive and the mercy in asking for forgiveness. Hamilton uses his congregations real stories and biblical principles to bring forgiveness to light in each and everyone's walk with Christ. No matter where you are at in your walk with Christ this book will bring inspiration and yes great courage and compassion in getting you where you need to be.
June 18, 2013
We don't live in a forgiving world, but that isn't a new condition for humanity. Indeed, when God asked our first forebears, "did you eat of the tree I said was off limits?" The man blamed God saying, "The woman you gave me fruit from the tree & i ate." Then the woman said "the snake tricked me & I ate." No one said I'M SORRY or PLEASE FORGIVE ME/US. this has been the contrition of our lives: we don't recognize our sin, so we don't ask for forgiveness.
Yet forgiveness frees us to go beyond our limits as humans, just as unleashing as dog in a park allows him to stretch his legs and run free! There is a joy in not carrying the burden of our brokenness (our backpack full of stones) and in being able to stand up straight and tall. Feeling the sunlight on our face as we look up is so much better than constantly looking down as we trudge a well worn path of unforgiving sin. There is no sin which cannot be forgiven by God, for they all have been covered & redeemed in the gift of his Son on the cross. Even if we cannot speak to the person we have hurt or who has hurt us, God can hear us and carry that message for us across life, death and eternity.
Yet forgiveness frees us to go beyond our limits as humans, just as unleashing as dog in a park allows him to stretch his legs and run free! There is a joy in not carrying the burden of our brokenness (our backpack full of stones) and in being able to stand up straight and tall. Feeling the sunlight on our face as we look up is so much better than constantly looking down as we trudge a well worn path of unforgiving sin. There is no sin which cannot be forgiven by God, for they all have been covered & redeemed in the gift of his Son on the cross. Even if we cannot speak to the person we have hurt or who has hurt us, God can hear us and carry that message for us across life, death and eternity.
May 20, 2015
I found this book full of examples of ordinary people who made the leap to forgive and make their life better. Rev. Hamilton has incite into people's hearts. He can reach places, into spaces of a person's life that makes all the difference. He explains difficult to understand concepts so a regular person can get them. He uses his own life experiences as examples. Bringing a tear more than once. Mr. Hamilton can move you deeply. Having been raised with forgiveness as a key skill I never knew the reasons for it. I was convinced by this book that it is one to continue in my life. The forgiveness skill is not only for the big things but also for daily small things. Forgiving doesn't mean you don't get angry and express it. It doesn't mean you are meek. In fact I would say it is one of the most profound experiences of our lives. Read this book. In fact read as many books by mr. Hamilton as you can. A wonderful writer.
December 10, 2013
This book came into my life at the perfect time. When someone had hurt me to the depths of my being. This person has to this date never apologise for their actions, but through this book, I have been able to forgive them.
Holding onto anger, frustrations and bitterness was only harming me. Not the person hurting me. Adam guided me through this process in an intelligent way that ended my "pity party".
I feel so much better after reading and implementing ideas from this book. It didn't cure the situation, but helped me realize that I can only control my reactions. That by hanging on to the hurt, I am allowing her to continue to hurt me.
It is great if you are struggling with this, or know of someone who is.
Holding onto anger, frustrations and bitterness was only harming me. Not the person hurting me. Adam guided me through this process in an intelligent way that ended my "pity party".
I feel so much better after reading and implementing ideas from this book. It didn't cure the situation, but helped me realize that I can only control my reactions. That by hanging on to the hurt, I am allowing her to continue to hurt me.
It is great if you are struggling with this, or know of someone who is.
September 8, 2012
Another wonderful session with Adam Hamilton, senior pastor at COR in KC! He likens hurts we experience to pebbles (or in more serious cases, stones or boulders). A very tangible illustration of how inferred slights or insults can weigh us down and harm our physical and spiritual health, this book was very pertinent to anyone suffering from holding grudges against family, friends or oc-workers. Although I enjoyed the quick read, I'm not sure it would be appropriate for group discussion except in a very trusting, close-knit covenant group because of the personal nature of the questions.
January 13, 2014
In typical style, Adam Hamilton writes about forgiveness, particular in light of our current relationships. He offers a path of working through what it means to let the small things go and celebrate the good, to work through the slightly bigger things and is honest that the largest hurts we receive take a lot of work and even some outside help.
This book reads like a collection of sermons, is full of stories and examples, and works to help the reader understand that forgiveness is more than just forgetting but is a working toward redemption.
This book reads like a collection of sermons, is full of stories and examples, and works to help the reader understand that forgiveness is more than just forgetting but is a working toward redemption.
Read
January 16, 2015An Unsettled Review
There is some really good material in Hamilton's book. There are some great insights and some great tools for embracing a life of forgiveness. I think many will be blessed by it. However, I felt like he often elevated psychology over Scripture, choosing interpretations of some passages with more pop theology and personal opinion, than wrestling with the difficult words. It is worth a read, but there is much better material on forgiveness available from both faith-based perspectives and psychological ones.
There is some really good material in Hamilton's book. There are some great insights and some great tools for embracing a life of forgiveness. I think many will be blessed by it. However, I felt like he often elevated psychology over Scripture, choosing interpretations of some passages with more pop theology and personal opinion, than wrestling with the difficult words. It is worth a read, but there is much better material on forgiveness available from both faith-based perspectives and psychological ones.
May 25, 2014
I my most recent novel, Faith - Seventy Times Seven, Reverend Ada Slaton lived with an abusive alcoholic for twenty years. She was always able to find forgiveness for his wrongdoings. I searched for the answer that she found, but am still searching. Adam Hamilton has written an excellent book on Forgiveness! Reading this book helped me in finding the answer that Sister Ada found in her 58 years as the First Lady of the Louisiana Presbytery. Good job Adam!
August 11, 2016
Yet another wonderful book by Pastor Hamilton.
His own compassion, humility, and serene faith flow through each sentence.
We all need forgiveness. We need to get it from those we've wronged. We need to give it to those who we have hurt.
Hurting one another is a part of being human. Being capable of offering forgiveness, mercy, and grace is a sign that God has created each of us in God's image.
His own compassion, humility, and serene faith flow through each sentence.
We all need forgiveness. We need to get it from those we've wronged. We need to give it to those who we have hurt.
Hurting one another is a part of being human. Being capable of offering forgiveness, mercy, and grace is a sign that God has created each of us in God's image.
Displaying 1 - 30 of 48 reviews