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Maureen Birnbaum, Barbarian Swordsperson

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As Mike Resnick remarks in his introduction, the author has created "an entirely new type of humor - Preppy Science Fiction." Here are Maureen Birnbaum's first eight adventures, For Sure!: Maureen Birnbaum, Barbarian Swordsperson; Maureen Birnbaum at the Earth's Core; Maureen Birnbaum on the Art of War; Maureen Birnbaum After Dark; Maureen Birnbaum Goes Shopynge; Maureen Birnbaum and the Saint Graal; Maureen Birnbaum at the Looming Awfulness; Maureen Birnbaum's Lunar Adventure.

154 pages, Hardcover

First published January 1, 1993

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George Alec Effinger

208 books221 followers

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5 stars
31 (14%)
4 stars
92 (41%)
3 stars
81 (36%)
2 stars
15 (6%)
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Displaying 1 - 29 of 29 reviews
Profile Image for Tom King.
Author 5 books3 followers
January 21, 2016
You need a sense of humor for this one. If you're one of those guys that lives in your Mom's basement and have a complete Viking raider costume complete with horned helmet and warhammer, you might not appreciate the broad satire of your favorite genre. Effinger drills straight into dozens of our favorite classic sci-fi and sword and sorcery epics and skewers the improbable magic and unlikely setups that are so often found in low-grade pulp fiction of this sort. He also does a nice job playing in harder sci-fi worlds as well. The sword and sorcery devotees may not find this particularly funny. Serious lot they are to say the least. This book made me laugh out loud. I wish I had written it.
Profile Image for Ian.
84 reviews5 followers
January 8, 2019
In the title piece of this collection of cult-fave stories, prep-school senior Maureen "Muffy" Birnbaum finds herself transported to Edgar Rice Burroughs' Barsoom (unnamed but readily identifiable nonetheless) and prevails against the natives armed only with her Heather-ish attitude and sense of entitlement (well, a honking big sword she picks up along the way helps too). Subsequent adventures take her to similarly copyright infringement-skirting versions of Burroughs' Pellucidar, Isaac Asimov's Nightfall, H.P. Lovecraft's Cthulhu mythos, and so on, all of which she survives with her attitude and manicure intact. Sure, it's a one-joke idea, but it's a pretty funny joke all the same.
Profile Image for Melissa.
78 reviews1 follower
February 24, 2013
I was first introduced to Muffy & Bitsy in one of Esther Friesner's Chicks in Chainmail anthologies, and fell in love. I found this collection in a used bookstore and bought it without hesitation. The main stories of Muffy's adventures were fun but grew old fast, possibly because I don't know the backgrounds of the different worlds she intrudes upon. Of more interest to me was the progression of Bitsy's personal life. I enjoyed the book, but I think a dedicated collection is the wrong format for these characters - due to the story's very nature, these should remain split up, something to be stumbled upon at various intervals in time.
Profile Image for Jim.
1,453 reviews95 followers
December 8, 2024
The late George Alec Effinger does a great job of parodying other authors with his stories of the teenage Maureen "Muffie" Birnbaum. His heroine finds herself on Barsoom, then at the Earth's Core, and then in other worlds. Perhaps my favorite is the story about Ms. Birnbaum appearing on the planet named Lagash just in time to face the panic that ensued when Night Fell ( from Isaac Asimov's "Nightfall").
Very entertaining stories--only wish there were more adventures of the gorgeous sword-wielding Muffie Birnbaum.
Profile Image for Charles.
Author 41 books287 followers
June 9, 2009
Almost everyone loves these stories. I'm afraid I don't. Oh, they are well written, very clever, and witty, but they're not my cup of tea. I like my fantasy straight up and taken more seriously. These have just too much tongue in cheek for me to really enjoy.
Profile Image for Craig.
6,351 reviews177 followers
October 2, 2009
This collection is a lot of fun; it casts a clueless, preppy, Jewish princess society girl in the role of a swashbuckling, swordswoman-adventuress in famous fictional fantasy worlds. Great funny stuff!
195 reviews22 followers
October 7, 2009
A nifty collection of short stories, taking the classic concept of the crossworld hopping person from the modern world ending up in a fantasy setting (this one resembling a Burroughs "Barssom" setting) and adapting to their new surroundings rapidly. Its done with tongue in cheek and humor as the goal, as well as satire, and in this case a Jewish Princess Valley Girl that becomes a Barbarian Swordswoman when she world hops....

It's probably hard to find a copy, and long out of print, but worth it if you can.
Profile Image for Rob.
280 reviews20 followers
April 14, 2009
If you love parody, you have to read this. It's a scream. THe only low point may be when Maureen enters into a shopping context with Maid Marian. That, I could do without. But the rest is excellent.
482 reviews32 followers
August 21, 2018
And Hilarity Ensues


6 of 6 people found the following review helpful
Reflections in History's Mirror, September 4, 2012





This review is from: Thinking in Time: The Uses of History for Decision-Makers (Paperback)
Created for their single semester Harvard course for training political decision makers, authors Neustadt and May's historiography focuses on a several recent American turning points and examines how historical precedent either did or could have persuaded those involved. The book intrigues on multiple levels, first as a comparison between similar events, second as a profile of the personalities involved such as Kennedy, LBJ, Reagan and Carter, third as a set of methods for outlining perspectives and finally, even though the book is 26 years old and predates the collapse of the Soviet Union, the subjects discussed such as health care, social entitlements and military confrontation are still relevant today, even more so today in light of the 2012 election cycle.

Any methodology has the benefit of crystallizing the issues. N&M's approach advises the guarded use of analogy. Having selected one of more exemplars they suggest outlining the similarities and differences between them and the current situation. Since our knowledge of events are incomplete, categorize features as "Known", "Unknown" and "Presumed". Instead of describing the problem, an approach that might bias the conclusion, tell the story and tell it from the perspective of different actors. In addition to asked the 5W's, ask "Alexander's Question" - what new information might challenge the "Presumed" items and lead to a different course of action. Additionally they recommend "Placement" - creating a timeline of events in the lives of key players in order to understand their motivation. The technique is nicely summarized at the end of the book.

The case studies are marvelous and include LBJ's intense use of placement as a political tool (allegedly saying: I never feel really comfortable with a man unless I have his pecker in my pocket), the wide range of historic parallels used by Kennedy's emergency cabinet during the Cuban missile crisis, Truman's extensive knowledge of and ability to ability to apply history without which he is easily misread, and the key insight into Reagan that he was influenced positively by the New Deal and had a deep and genuine admiration for FDR's approach to leadership. Another good case was the debate and planning for the 1977 Swine Flu (more recent examples would be the preventative regime implemented to combat SARS or the awareness campaign and infrastructure created in reaction to AIDS) which was strongly linked to the pandemic of 1918 which killed a half million Americans and had more victims by the end of WWI than the war itself! N&M also unkinde to problems of the Carter presidency which they viewed as technically motivated and, beyond the imagery of the 100 day post-election "honeymoon" which resulted in an overly ambitious program that failed to pass, did not employ historic analogy. With his tendency to sermonize they likened Carter to a Baptist preacher, surrounded by like mannered people, who tended to assume the moral high ground rather than constructively engage with others, an example being his treatment of German Chancellor Helmut Schmidt. Like FDR he engaged in fireside chats with the nation, but whereas FDR was uplifting, Carter's broadcasts were more downbeat and depressing. N&M also focus on the failure of the SALT II disarmament talks and Carter's fractious relationship with leading Senator Henry "Scoop" Jackson, but surprisingly neglect what was, at least on first inspection, his major success, the Camp David Accords.

I was especially intrigued by the rivalry between Francis Perkins, US Secretary of Labour during the Depression and WW II and Mary Anderson, Director of the Woman's bureau and subordinate to her. The two came from different backgrounds but had similar feminist ideals - yet Anderson made the tactical mistake of alienating Perkins by accusing her of betraying ideals, which she was not rather than working within the framework of finding common goals. The result allowed Anderson to keep her position, but damaged her advancement.

The last chapter is a paean to reading history and makes a number of excellent though ambitious recommendations. The authors tend to favour accounts written by individuals close in time to events, especially autobiographies, ie Ulysses S. Grant , or wielding influence such as Churchill , rather than recent historians who run the risk of layering too much hindsight based on outcomes. The book informs, entertains and elevates the level of discussion leading one to seek out similar approaches to historic interpretation.

A great read and highly recommended.
Profile Image for Marsha.
Author 2 books40 followers
June 9, 2019
At first glance, what you notice about this book is the woman on the cover. Like a Frazetta of old, she is scantily clad in the sort of gear Red Sonja used to wear, metal bikini, sword at her side. But look closer. Are those—credit cards tucked into the G-string? Are those two shopping bags on her left arm, one nearly obscured by the 1990s-computer-screen-yellow letters in the title?

The blurb on the jacket confirms that something is not quite as it seems. In fact, nothing is. Maureen Danielle Birnbaum has been inexplicably whisked away from her skiing trip in Vermont to a red dust planet. She’s on Mars, completely starkers, and yet somehow able to breathe the air, leap many feet in a single bound and communicate in English with the first gorgeous humanoid male she meets.

Yep, it’s a clear parody of an Edgar Rice Burroughs novel, complete with damsel in distress. But Maureen isn’t one to stay distressed for long. She’s a strong, powerful piece of womanhood, thank you very much, and when she finds a sword and notices four-armed Martians slaughtering a whole bunch of people, she wades in swinging.

Maureen isn’t a dim piece of fluff either. She knows how to fence, has in-depth knowledge of Earth history and doesn’t hold back on putting men in their place if they try to treat her as if she’s fragile or stupid. She also is something of a frenemy, constantly popping back to harass her friend Bitsy with her adventures while taking nasty digs at her throughout her revelations of her fantastical exploits. Maureen is smart, pert, competent, cunning, calm in the face of danger yet also calculating, greedy, garrulous, opinionated and occasionally mean spirited. So she’s a well-rounded character, with her share of flaws and virtues.

Muffy’s brand of chatty, self-righteous feminism can be a little hard to take. Her snipes at her friend Elizabeth (not Bitsy, if you please) make her seem caught in a perpetual brand of childhood, a kind of reverse Peter Pan who bothers Wendy with the tales of his adventures while she’s growing up and trying to rear a family.

The stories don’t necessarily inspire hearty gusts of laughter. But, as Mr. Effinger transports Maureen from one author’s worldscape to another, we see the humor of this Nineties woman yanked through space and time with no one else to talk to and in forever search of her stalwart Martian man. Maureen must be lonely but she never lets on so you don’t pity her. Instead, you admire her gumption and smile to see her taken through various scenarios from some of the most famous science fiction authors of previous decades.

This anthology of fanfiction is one that collectors of past science fiction writing will want to get their hands on if it’s not on their shelves already.
Profile Image for Kathy KS.
1,442 reviews8 followers
September 13, 2021
The title for this one grabbed me years ago and it was placed on my TBR list. The concept sounded fun, too. Maureen Birnbaum, private school senior, suddenly finds herself on Mars, a la John Carter of Mars. From that start, Maureen (aka Muffy) becomes a "barbarian" swordperson and ends up travelling through time and space to help right wrongs, etc.

After each trip, she returns to "home" and reports her adventures to her best friend, whether Bitsy (Elizabeth) wants to hear it or not.

I'm kind of with Elizabeth here. After awhile, this "gag" became rather tiresome. Although there are some funny things, it's all very superficial and Maureen actually gets rather tiresome.

A fun idea that is better as the short stories (which is how they were each originally published), rather than all together in one longer volume.
Profile Image for Larry.
266 reviews5 followers
April 6, 2018
This book is a lot of fun. I read many of these stories when they first came out in the magazines, but this is the first time I have seen them collected in one place. The central conceit is that Maureen is a prep-school senior who embarks on a series of fantastic adventures and recounts them to her best friend from school, and these adventures take place in fantasy universe created by other authors.
1,187 reviews5 followers
September 5, 2022
About two pages in I was prepared to give this book a two star rating but the further on you read the more the character of Maureen Birnbaum (not Muffy!) grows on you. Love her self descriptions - Fierce fighting woman etc. I was actually disappointed when I reached the books end - I wanted more!!
Highly recommended to anyone who wants a little light reading real sorry there will not be a Maureen Birnbaum, Barbarian Swordsperson #2
Profile Image for Pat.
Author 20 books5 followers
September 15, 2023
(Okay; the library was the Internet Archive, which I treasure.) Fun book, even if the inspiration was rather misogynist (young women do get to talk to each other about what interests them in whatever way they want, even if it doesn't interest the writer at the next table). A book that maybe only certain generations will enjoy, but Maureen is delightful, swinging Old Betsey around with great vigor and panache.
Profile Image for Charles.
Author 2 books
May 25, 2019
A group of parodies based on a privileged New York college girl who travels from one fantasy/SF scenario to another, starting with Burroughs' Mars but including Asimov's "Nightfall." Middling humorous fanfic from a writer who is capable of doing much better. Kinda feels like he's slumming, but a mildly amusing read anyway
Profile Image for George.
596 reviews39 followers
June 4, 2019
I'm fairly sure that my feeling of uninventiveness about the last one or two stories was due more to them having been assembled where I could read them all on top of each other rather than months apart.

But the fact that they WERE assembled where I could read them all on top of each other is worth knocking a star off from my standard of 5 for fully achieving the target aimed.
Profile Image for PyranopterinMo.
479 reviews
August 11, 2019
I might have read this once upon a time. I completely forgot until Amazon recommended it. Two stars for finished but nearly forgotten. I remember it tried to be funny. I don't think I even kept the book.
Profile Image for Vincent.
273 reviews5 followers
November 16, 2020
I remember in 5th grade almost getting this book confiscated because of the cover. Intelligent me didn't even think to remove the dust cover. Luckily, I was a good student and my English teacher gave me the benefit of the doubt.
1,100 reviews
October 20, 2017
Was an okay parody of a lot of different fantasy / sci-fi worlds. Not bad, but didn't find it particularly funny for some reason. Chuckled a couple of times. That was about it.
Profile Image for Hallie.
242 reviews24 followers
November 14, 2018
Silly, campy fun with archetypes. Very much of its time/place. Recommend reading the series referenced before diving in, though.
Profile Image for Michael Swanson.
Author 3 books12 followers
November 22, 2019
I don't usually go for silly, but this is a fine bit of silly. Anything I say about its place in our culture will be misconstrued at this time, so I'll trap it behind a tight-lipped smirk.
Profile Image for Scott Golden.
344 reviews9 followers
July 27, 2016
For fans, the fun in these stories is how they (gently-ish) satirize the popular fantasy/SF/horror worlds to which our intrepid heroine is whisked off to. Also fun is how Maureen overcomes -- or sometimes uses to her advantage -- her shallow, materialistic surface personality in order to overcome the various challenges that come her way. By no means is this serious stuff, but it's good fun, and short enough that it avoids the fatal flaw of wearing out its welcome.
Profile Image for Jerry Robinette.
19 reviews5 followers
Read
March 27, 2012
Effinger is very funny, and an astute observer of the tropes, cliches and conventions of the heroic fantasy genre. Several famous worlds take their licks in here, but none of it is mean-spirited. You can tell these stories were written by a fan of the sub-genre. Pleasant, amusing, worth looking up if you're also a fan.
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Profile Image for Jenniffer.
113 reviews
August 7, 2011
Like Totally! No story is safe where Maureen Birnbaum is concerned. This book contains short stories, such as Maureen Birnbaum at the Earth's Core, and Maureen Birnbaum's Lunar Adventure. its definitely worth reading for the laughs.
Profile Image for Anna.
1,038 reviews62 followers
November 22, 2015
jewish princess who speaks with a heavy 80s valley accent hops thru a few , like, well known SciFi/Fantasy plots.
The author gleefully parodies everything from fictional worlds (the very first trip is to Barsoom of course! followed by a stop in Pellucidar) to The Holy Grail mythos
95 reviews3 followers
January 2, 2016
Although some stories still made me chuckle, overall the book hasn't aged well. The "real world" sections are too dated, and characterization is done broadly, well past satire and back around to condescending. So what made me chuckle? The send-ups of the F/SF genre stories themselves.
Profile Image for Rick Jones.
823 reviews4 followers
February 14, 2012
I was lured by Effingers' trilogy of arabic themed science fiction, but this was not nearly as thought provoking, nor was the 'ironic' value really up to snuff.
Displaying 1 - 29 of 29 reviews

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