Grieving: A Beginner's Guide

by Jerusha Hull McCormack

There is no sure route through grieving. Jerusha McCormack provides instead a series of signposts by which we may find our own path to a new life. “We are all amateurs at grief,” she writes, “it comes to us all; we must all go through it. To treat grief as a problem to be fixed, or (worse still) to medicalize it, is to rob us of the extraordinary privilege of encountering this experience on our terms: for each of us has our own way of grieving, and each of us has something special to learn from the process.”

Genres: Grief, Nonfiction, Self Help

148 pages, Paperback

First published October 1, 2005

Reviews

[Katy · Rating 3 out of 5]

While I can't say I "enjoyed" reading this book, it was certainly helpful and informative. Parts of it were extremely difficult to read, particularly the parts that said that grief never goes away and that your life is permanently altered. As someone who does not like change in the slightest, this was a startling statement.

I can honestly say that the author did an excellent job of transferring her ideas into a managable book for the grieving. I would recommend it with a warning: She is honest, and it can be a little upsetting and difficult to read. Please be prepared for this beforehand.

[Lisse · Rating 3 out of 5]

One of my best friends from college recently died, so I picked up this book from the library. It's nothing ground breaking or new, but it was a nice little book to walk with me through this very hard time and join me on my journey through the greiving process. I recommend it for anyone who needs to see that other people have also been on this journey and continue on it to this day. It also gives good ideas on different ways to work through parts of the greiving process.

[Christine · Rating 3 out of 5]

"This is the Hour of Lead -
Remembered if outlived,
As Freezing persons, recollect the Snow -
First - Chill - then Stupor - Then letting go -"

It must take courage to write a message of ...?... to the grieving. There probably is no book, no philosophy, no sunset, no memory that quite gets grief - it is too personal. Maybe this lack of universal understanding is just one of the terms, for better or worse, that those of us who have willingly held a mortal hand must accept. I think McCormack gives as much as she can in plain prose, in poetry, in advice. It's not enough. She doesn't get there, but she gets somewhere. She'll keep you afloat, maybe. I do not like that she dwells on how the death of a loved one brings us closer to the fact of our own mortality. Who cares? I wish she focused more on what to do with the complex bond that won't seem to die, but clearly doesn't live. There are some sharp pangs that I wish she could answer to, but it's also the first book I've finished in months. Still searching. But I do like the advice she gives at the end for those who love someone experiencing grief. It's a very particular sort of pain.

[Anne · Rating 4 out of 5]

Publisher's Weekly said in a review, "McCormack includes a chapter of "Guidelines for Spirit Guardians," offering advice to those who accompany grieving people so they can be fully present and helpful."

I liked that chapter, too. I can't recall anything specific about the chapter at the moment but thought the tips useful.

[Jacqi · Rating 4 out of 5]

I really wish I had received this book when my mother had died. It's really good at explaining a type of grieving process, and how to help those who are grieving.

[Katherine · Rating 5 out of 5]

Very validating of what I've been feeling. I may have to send a copy to my sister.

[Erika · Rating 3 out of 5]

I read this book in an effort to identify helpful resources for clients in my psychotherapy practice. I like that the author debunks the idea that grief is linear and follows steps or stages. It does not. What I didn't like about the book, however, is how it was organized. The flow felt disjointed to me, which could've been an issue with formatting by the publisher, how the author organized the topics or both. Useful information, but not the smoothest read.

[Kim Story · Rating 5 out of 5]

I highly recommend this book. It was applicable to the loss of my parents last year as it was to the loss of my 30 year marriage three years ago.

[Becky · Rating 4 out of 5]

A helpful book to those of us on the journey through grief. It also contains wise words for friends on how to (and how not to) respond to a person in the midst of pain.

[Tara Trottier · Rating 3 out of 5]

I think the last chapter was the best and most important. The rest of the book had good information as well.

[Mitch · Rating 4 out of 5]

Not bad for a book of this kind, in a bankrupt genre.

[Dave · Rating 5 out of 5]

When my father died, this book helped me through the pain.

[Leigh · Rating 2 out of 5]

Boring writing and useless advice.

[Kim · Rating 5 out of 5]

bought yesterday at library got a bag of books for $2.00