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‘According to Netflix, this is NOT how my teenage life is supposed to look.’
When Emma Nash is ghosted by love of her life Leon Naylor, she does what any girl would do - spends the summer avoiding all human contact, surrounded by the Chewit wrappers he left behind.
Seeing Leon suddenly ‘in a relationship’ on Facebook, however, spurs Emma into action. She vows to use the internet for good (instead of stalking Leon’s social media),chronicling her adventures on her new Editing Emma blog.
But life online doesn’t always run smoothly.
From finding her mum’s Tinder profile, to getting catfished and accidentally telling the entire world why Leon Naylor is worth no girl’s virginity… Surely nothing else could go wrong?!
337 pages, Kindle Edition
First published August 10, 2017
How long are you supposed to wait for a kiss to happen, before leaving?
Then his head whacked me in the face. It was nice, I think.
Right. Time to start on my resolutions...
[..]
Or I could always go to my room and masturbate all afternoon. It does seem infinitely more appealing.
[..]
Six orgasms in half an hour. That's one every five minutes. If you look at my daily activity based on masturbation alone, I'm actually an incredibly productive person.
”How come, when you do really mundane things on your own, it’s not art, but as soon as you invite people to look at you doing it, it can be art? I feel like that’s a rule that should change. I can be art right here, right now. I can be still unthinking, unfeeling art. Some might say I was just a person sitting and staring into space on a toilet, but they would be wrong.”


If guys bled out of their penises for a week of every month, you can bet we'd hear more about it.
["br"]>["br"]>["br"]>["br"]>["br"]>["br"]>["br"]>Don’t worry so much about meeting someone else I like. Be a version of MYSELF I like.
Conclusion : I DO NOT NEED TO DRINK ALCOHOL TO MAKE MYSELF INTERESTING.