Vegemorphs: The fungus among us

by Leif E. Green

We can't tell you all of the details of the plot. It's too dangerous. But believe us, there is a plot - a plot to take over the universe. And it starts with a seemingly innocuous epidemic of athlete's foot. No joke! Stop scratching and pull yourself together. You could be in deep. And we might need you to step in. Oh, how crude-ite! What if we told you that planet Earth is in jeopardy? That an awful plague is headed for you and everyone you know? And that only a handful of kids are empowered to do anything about it? Well, all of this and more is true. Five kids have a strange gift-an ability to morph into any vegetable at will- and only they can can save us. For only nutrient rich vegetables can ward of the spread of this ravaging disease. Beware potatoes of all kinds - couch, augratin, french fried - now rule! So be kind to them. They know things we don't. For the sake of humanity, forget what your mom told you and don't eat your vegetables. You never know which one might be our planets savior-or your little sister. A parody of best selling Animorphs. 112 pages

Genres: Science Fiction, Comedy

112 pages, Paperback

First published September 1, 1998

Reviews

[Richard L. Haas III · Rating 1 out of 5]

Once again, an American writer kills millions of brain cells in our young student’s minds. Frankly, an Anamorphs parody is a brilliant idea… Vegemorphs, does not live up to the brilliance of the idea. I just don't understand, just because it's a kid's novel, you don't have to write poorly. Besides having an obsession with referencing "Alice and Wonderland" and Disney, Green battles from writing awkward sentences (“Olivia is Hispanic, and also drop-dead gorgeous, though in a different way from Randi,” which sounds racist and incestuous given that Randi is his cousin), stupid characters and tons of masturbation allegories:

“Then, suddenly, the sensation was gone, and I felt better than I had ever felt in my life. It was like I had been all mixed up—and now everything was mixed right. I had been tossed.”

“The carrot continued to vibrate. The vibrations grew stronger and stronger. The carrot began to pulsate. Then there was some kind of little explosion, like the pop! of a balloon. The human Cary sat on the counter. He was naked and soaking wet…I thought my nerves were going to jump right through my skin!… Quickly I pulled off my T-shirt… Then I laid a dish towel over his lap.”

“As the Jerkks got close, we aimed our tubes and squeezed hard. Splat! Splat! Splatsplatsplatsplatsplat! Globs of antifungal cream went flying through the air in all directions….I squirted and zapped, squirted and zapped, squirted and zapped. I think the zapping was what kept me from falling down from exhaustion. It came naturally to me, just as Prince Brassica had said it would. And it was energizing. The more I zapped, the more I glowed with vitamins and minerals."

Normally I don't include this many quotes in my review, but I absolutely had to because this book is simply unbelievable, inappropriate, and disappointing and I think they prove my point rather well.

[Aaron · Rating 3 out of 5]

"If you've never been an ear of corn, I guess that's hard to understand."

Bumping this up to three stars for the cover art and for that exquisite nom de plume. Scratched a very specific itch that usually can only be satisfied by watching random episodes of a 90s animated superhero parody such as Action League Now! or Freakazoid! which is weird because this one doesn't even have an exclamation point in the title.

[Dan · Rating 2 out of 5]

Animorphs parody where the kids turn into vegetables instead of animals.

Couldn’t pass this up when I found it for $2 at the used bookstore near my place, and unfortunately it wasn’t good. But that’s on me for having any kind of expectations for something so silly.

[Leander · Rating 1 out of 5]

The worst book I've ever read. (Or at least one of them)

I wasn't sure as I started reading it as to if it was a serious book that was poorly written or an attempt at parody, making fun of it's predecessor book series, Animorphs.

But be it any, I was so angry by the time I finished it, as to having wasted my time, that I almost felt like deleting my entire ebook stash.

The protagonists, Kale, Carrot, Olive, Radish have a superpower. They can all turn into vegetables they smell.
Stupid enough yet?

Will advice everyone to never ever read it. Is a complete and utter waste of time.

[Emily · Rating 2 out of 5]

I own every Animorphs book, because I dearly love Animorphs. I also own this (frankly awful) book, because I'm a completionist. Hesitated between a 1 and 2 Star rating. Rounded up because the author does display familiarity with the source material, including some smaller details like the picture of Elfangor's family.

[Kashew · Rating 5 out of 5]

disclaimer: i've never read animorphs
i read this as a kid idk why we had this in my house. i dont remember it much but i remember the plot being quite alright. i remember carrot staying with the veggies, that was emotional. phenomenal book. parodys are supposed to be weird but this was great on its own. i havent heard about a second one so this is all we got and im lokey sad. anyway 11/10 would recommend. i actually did recommend and lent my book to one of my pals and bro also enjoyed it. so do yourself a favor and read vegemorphs.

[Uriel Rosenzweig · Rating 1 out of 5]

One note. Nearly unreadable.

[Jennifer · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book is so dumb. 10/10⭐️

[canariez · Rating 5 out of 5]

FIRE 🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥

[Lynne Page · Rating 3 out of 5]

As a fan of the Animorphs books growing up, when I saw this book, I knew I had to read it.

The author knew their stuff. There were enough references to the Animorphs that this really was a spoof on the series that I had so loved.

This book was also filled with many vegetable puns. So. Many.

I have no idea who really wrote this book, but it felt as though I were reading something a witty teenager wrote.

It was cute. But also a bit... too corny. ;)

[Z · Rating 3 out of 5]

This wasn’t quite as funny as I thought it would be, but it certainly had its moments. The fact that the broccoli Prince didn’t die bothered me a bit, though. It sort of changed the whole plot.

[Karthik Thrikkadeeri · Rating 1 out of 5]

I certainly did not like it. Like all parodies. In spite of that, I did like SOME parts. Anyway, that's the best an author of a parody can do, I guess.