Let's Pretend We Never Met

by Melissa C. Walker

The Thing About Jellyfish meets The Kind of Friends We Used to Be in this sweet, honest middle grade debut.

If it were up to Mattie Markham, there would be a law that said your family wasn’t allowed to move in the middle of the school year. After all, sixth grade is hard enough without wondering if you’ll be able to make new friends or worrying that the kids in Pennsylvania won’t like your North Carolina accent.

But when Mattie meets her next-door neighbor and classmate, she begins to think maybe she was silly to fear being the “new girl.” Agnes is like no one Mattie has ever met—she’s curious, hilarious, smart, and makes up the best games. If winter break is anything to go by, the rest of the school year should be a breeze.

Only it isn’t, because when vacation ends and school starts, Mattie realizes something: At school Agnes is known as the weird girl who no one likes. All Mattie wants is to fit in (okay, and maybe be a little popular too), but is that worth ending her friendship with Agnes?

Genres: Middle Grade, Realistic Fiction, Fiction, Contemporary, Childrens, Young Adult, Friendship

256 pages, Paperback

First published June 13, 2017

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Reviews

[Stephanie Fitzgerald · Rating 3 out of 5]

A good middle-grade read. A young girl makes friends with the child that’s considered the “odd duck” at school. Lessons are learned about the fact that “different” doesn’t have to mean bad or weird. Reminded me a bit of the old children’s classic The Hundred Dresses.

[Talia · Rating 3 out of 5]

There should be more middle grade books that tackle having friends with disabilities. I'm all for it, the world is all for it, and I'm so glad this is becoming more commonplace!

To begin, Mattie has just moved from her small town in North Carolina to a new apartment in the city of Philadelphia. The adjustment is huge, and within days Mattie can feel her best friends back home pulling away from her. It's to be expected, as she's no longer a block away and also doesn't have a cellphone, but it hurts. Mattie starts off her new life reluctant to let go of the past (she even keeps a piece of string a boy she liked gave her, as a special treasure), but things begin to improve after she meets next door neighbor Agnes. Agnes is unlike anyone Mattie has ever met. She's fast, filled with color, and imaginative. Her memory is oustanding, she's NEVER boring, and she makes Mattie happy. But Agnes also makes weird noises sometimes. She can't stand to be touched. And when it becomes apparent that Agnes is the "weird kid" at Mattie's new school, Mattie wonders if maybe she's better off having pretended she never met Agnes in the first place.

I feel like every kid will be able to find something relatable in this story. It's a friendship story, first and foremost. What happens when you meet someone, and you like them, but all your other friends think this person is weird? Do you go with the crowd? Do you try and be a 'good' person no matter the risk? What even constitutes a 'good person'? Mattie is dealing with a move, her parents fighting & job struggles, her grandmother's illness, and her own issues with who she is as a person. She wants to be friends with Agnes, but she can't figure out how to do that without exposing herself as 'weird' too.

My one flaw with this book is Agnes is discussed as having social anxiety. That's the extent of her diagnosis. Agnes makes loud noises to herself in public, can't stand to be touched, has an incredible brain that makes her much smarter than her classmates, and is often skipping school. I just think the opportunity was missed to diagnose Agnes with autism. It would've been a great opportunity to show how fantastic Mattie and Agnes' friendship was, and how it was improved and special because of their differences. Saying Agnes just had social anxiety because of her parent's split, felt kind of like a cop out.

[Joanne Kelleher · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book presents a common situation that happens in middle school – for some reason, one friend doesn’t want to be friends anymore. In this case, the reason is that Mattie, the new girl, has unknowingly made friends with the weird girl in the class, and maintaining this friendship can ruin Mattie’s shot at being popular.
This story is a gentle version of how this scenario could unfold. It was very sweet, minimal drama, no social media.
It was a quick, enjoyable read.

[Cat · Rating 5 out of 5]

When I stop crying I'll be blogging about this. 💜

[T · Rating 5 out of 5]

A heart-warming and completely charming story about moving on, growing up, and being yourself (parallelism). A gentle look at the challenges of both fitting in to a new situation and having a friend with special needs.

This book inspires so many young people to not change who they are for others and to understand that some people are different but that doesn’t mean that they can’t be your friend.

The book drags you in (personification)with its wonderful story and beautifully designed characters. The book is really like real life so it is not that hard to understand the story.

I feel really moved by the motive behind this book and feel that it is a message that should be shared amongst others. The book is a very fun and quirky book great for middle schoolers.

I recommend this book to kids between the ages of 8-15 because they will enjoy the book more. This book is short and I finished it in a couple of hours. I think you should definitely check this book out.

[Abby Cooper · Rating 5 out of 5]

I really loved this MG! Original premise with super realistic friendship struggles.

[Lorraine · Rating 5 out of 5]

This was a very good middle-grade story about friendship. I highly recommend it.

[Cara · Rating 4 out of 5]

Delightful middle-grade! I loved the characters, the setting and the real emotions.

[Flor Méndez · Rating 4 out of 5]

Muy bonito 🥰 habla de la amistad, la lealtad y las decisiones que uno toma en la vida sin saber si estamos siendo las mejores personas que podemos ser.

Me gustó también que por fuera de la ansiedad no se hablara de etiquetas que encasillan en el imaginario popular a la gente: son personajes de 11 años, se pueden preocupar por diagnósticos más adelante. Lo importante es, como dice Agnes, que yo soy yo y está bien ser yo.

[Holly Burke · Rating 4 out of 5]

This middle grade story of friendship was so relatable. All of Mattie's feelings - cringe, confusion, sadness, bonding - came right through the page and into my heart. I love books with an apartment building setting, and this setting plays a big role in the friendship between Mattie and Agnes. Mattie has a lovely family, and I laughed every time she told the reader that her mom just "knows things" - meaning she really has Mattie's back. The cover is so cute! It's a feel-good book with a happy ending and great messages about friendship in the 6th grade. My biggest complaint - I wish it had a different title!

[Aubrie · Rating 4 out of 5]

The book "Let's Pretend We Never Met" teaches readers to appreciate the friends they have, and to understand the meaning of friendship. The story takes place in Pennsylvania where Mattie and her family moved from North Carolina to help her grandmother for medical reasons. Mattie moves to her apartment in Butler Towers in the middle of winter break and meets Agnes. Over the rest of the winter break, Agnes and Mattie become great friends. Once school starts for Mattie she makes new friends which think Agnes is weird, so this puts a strain on Agnes and Mattie's friendship and puts both of them in a slump. Later Mattie realizes the truth, that being popular doesn't matter and that her friendship with Agnes is more important so she makes up with her. Even Agnes doesn't like to be touched or touch people, she hugs Mattie. "'We're just us, ' I repeat. 'And we're friends.' I see her face soften, and then Agnes does something totally unexpected. She opens her arms, and it's a quick one, all bony arms, and weird angles, but it's unmistakable. It's a hug." This taught Mattie that her being friends with Agnes helped both of them in their life, and Mattie finally understood the true meaning of friendship.

[EJ · Rating 4 out of 5]

This was a very sweet book. On the surface a very similar book to most school stories, but the fact that one of the characters is on the spectrum adds a hint of depth to an otherwise fairly run of the mill story about fitting in at a new school.

[Emma Andje · Rating 4 out of 5]

*actual rating is 3.5 stars*

Sometimes moving is hard...
Mattie's family decides to move from North Carolina to Philadelphia to be closer to her paternal grandmother, for reasons unknown to Mattie. Not only does she have to leave her old school and friends behind, she also has to do it in the middle of the school year.

Sometimes friendship is difficult...
Mattie's two friends from North Carolina slowly become closer to each other and do not find the need to contact Mattie as often and Mattie would like them to. Luckily, Mattie has a neighbor her age in her new apartment building. However, her new neighbor, Agnes, is a little less than normal. Despite this, Agnes and Mattie quickly become friends over the course of winter break.

Sometimes you are in the wrong...
When it comes time to go back to school, Agnes says home, so Mattie has a chance to start making new friends at school without the influence of Agnes. But, Mattie learns that Agnes quirkiness is seen as weird at school. Upon Agnes's return to school Mattie ignores her on campus, but hangs out with her after school in their apartment building. This split between home and school creates difficulties in Mattie's view of Agnes and she starts to resent her friendship with someone who is not see as "normal."

Sometimes letting go is not easy...
At the same time, Mattie's grandmother is packing up the valuables at her home. Mattie's dad spends an ample amount of time helping his mother with the packing and helping her to not confuse Mattie with her cousin, Elodie.

Sometimes change is good...
In the end, Mattie learns several great lessons. She discovers what true friendship is and what it takes to be a good friend. She accepts her grandmother's condition and choices for how to live out her life. She observes what an equal partnership marriage looks like in her parents, and the give and take that comes with it. She learns that people grow up at their own paces and need room to grow by themselves. And, most importantly, Mattie learns to respect the personalities of others and how to best support those she loves.

Overall, I really enjoyed this book and appreciated all of the adorable moments in it. Mattie is in sixth grade, which is a difficult year in school even if you were not pulled out of school in the middle of the year. But, she takes it in stride and lives a wonderful rest of the year with her parents, new friends, and a budding puppy love. This book is relevant in context with the openness of mental disabilities and with popular culture with YouTube, cell phones, books, and movies (I especially loved the mention of the How to Train Your Dragon movies, which are some of my favorite films). It is a good opportunity to have children experience several difficult topics in a light, but still serious, way.

Let's Pretend We Never Met will definitely be in my wheelhouse of go-to books to recommend for upper elementary and middle school children in the future.

I was given an ARC of this book from the publisher in return for an honest review.

[Georgene · Rating 4 out of 5]

I really liked this story, but poor Mattie has to experience quite a bit of stress all at once. She moves with her parents in the middle of the school year and makes a new friend right away. Agnes P. Davis lives right next door and she is lots of fun. She is creative and energetic and she always has good ideas that Mattie is happy to join her in. But when Mattie starts school after Winter Break, Agnes totally ignores her, even though they are in the same class. Mattie discovers that Agnes is the weird kid in the class, and when Mattie starts noticing some of the weird things Agnes does, Mattie wonders if she should still be friend with Agnes. Mattie does meet other girls in the class, but she is torn about what to do.
Another part of the story is Mattie's beloved grandmother who seems to be developing dementia and sometimes calls Mattie by her cousin's name and gets confused at times. Mattie's parents are getting her grandmother ready to move into assisted living and sell her big old house that Mattie has always loved. But no one tells Mattie what is going on.
Mattie's character feels so authentic when she has to deal with all that is going on in her life. She makes a plan to do what she thinks is best for everyone involved.
This is a great book for middle grade readers with a good story that many will relate to. Agnes appears to be on the autism spectrum, but this is never stated explicitly. We just see what Mattie sees and it really works. I especially recommend this book to those readers who have an autistic child in their life so that they can see that these children are indeed special.

[Belfry · Rating 4 out of 5]

Let's Pretend We Never Met focuses on Mattie, an 11-year-old who's moved from North Carolina to Philadelphia in the middle of 6th grade so her parents can be closer to her elderly grandmother. The book follows the rest of her school year after winter break as she deals with new friends, bullies, her parents arguing, her grandma's worsening dementia, and her quirky neighbor and classmate Agnes.

I liked this one more than I initially thought. It's a slow start, but really picks up towards the middle. The writing style is pretty simple, so it shouldn't be hard for kids to get through quickly. Like most contemporary middle grade novels, it teaches kids how to be a good friend even when it's hard. Agnes is also strongly implied to have autism (I usually prefer when books imply differences like that rather than outright stating them, but I think I'm in the minority on that one). Overall, a sweet and short read.

(On an unrelated note, do kids that young really care about relationships and kissing? Maybe I'm just out of touch)

[Susan Dunn · Rating 4 out of 5]

Sixth-grader Mattie is NOT happy when her parents announce that they're moving in the middle of the school year. Matte's grandmother, Maeve, lives alone in Pennsylvania, and she is getting older and needs their help. So Mattie and her parents pack everything up and move to an apartment in the city. Within a couple of days the next door neighbor, Agnes, who is also 11, has shown up at their door and inserted herself into Mattie's life. Agnes P. Davis is a force of nature - funny, full of life and a little odd, but she's got plans galore. Over the winter break Mattie and Anges become fast friends. The problems begin when school starts up again. It turns out that Agnes doesn't have a lot of friends in their class - or really, any friends at all. She's so smart and so odd that she has become the class pariah. Mattie quickly realizes that if she is friends with Agnes she may have a hard time making friends with anyone else... This would make a great discussion title for a classroom or book group. Best for readers in grades 4-6.

[Maria Antonia · Rating 4 out of 5]

Mattie suddenly moves with her parents to Philadelphia to be closer to her ageing grandmother. She meets her next door neighbour, Agnes, who acts a little strange sometimes. And Mattie soon finds out that if she wants to make friends at school, she needs to keep her distance from Agnes.

I loved how this book deals with befriending the "weird" people in our lives. Mattie learns the value of Agnes, even with her quirks. I love how the teacher (and the door-people at the apartment) play a supportive role for Agnes in this story, helping Mattie see Agnes' value in the world. The grandmother, Maeve, is an enjoyable character. I felt they dealt well with her onset of dementia, especially as Mattie starts to figure out that that's what's going on.

Love the cover on this one. The two girls standing with their backs to one another, with Agnes focused on her birds. And Mattie, not quite sure what she wants to do about Agnes.

I give this book 3.5 Stars.

This review was originally published at my blog.

[Katie Fitzgerald · Rating 4 out of 5]

When Mattie Markham and her family move from North Carolina to Pennsylvania to be closer to Mattie's grandmother as she moves into assisted living, Mattie worries that she won't make new friends. She is grateful, therefore, to discover that living next door to her new apartment is a girl her age named Agnes. Agnes, who has an unnamed social disorder accompanied by anxiety, is definitely unusual, but her enthusiasm for life, and her way of making everything feel important and exciting are appealing to Mattie, and the two become close quickly. Unfortunately, though, when school starts up again after Christmas, Mattie discovers that in her new classroom, Agnes is considered the weird kid. Worried about jeopardizing her chances of friendship with her other classmates, Mattie begins to distance herself from Agnes, finding it difficult to reconcile the fun she has with Agnes at home with how strangely she behaves in class.

I chose to read Let's Pretend We Never Met solely based on the author, who is a fellow Vassar graduate and the author of the young adult novel, Unbreak My Heart, which I remembered praising in a review a few years ago. Once I learned what the book was about, there was a part of me that was afraid I'd just walked into a "Very Special Friendship" story a la Stargirl or Wonder, both of which I have found grating. I am so glad to be able to say that this book very clearly is not a message-driven story of the after school special variety, but a much more subtle character-driven novel about the difficulties of navigating fifth grade friendships.

All of the characters, from Mattie and her parents, to Agnes and her mom, to Mattie's new teacher and classmates, are believable despite their relative lack of dysfunction. Though there are problems in the story - Mattie's mom's struggle to find full-time work, Mattie's grandmother's signs of dementia, and Agnes's parents' marital difficulties - they are the problems of ordinary life, and these difficulties inform each other to give a complete portrait of Mattie as a character and her friendship with Agnes. Unlike Wonder, which essentially exploits Auggie's disfigurement to teach us all how to be tolerant and caring, this book simply delivers that message, quietly and without fanfare, in a way that is powerful without being obnoxious. Walker never reveals Agnes's diagnosis and instead defines her by her unique interests, her personality, and her behaviors, both the usual and unusual ones.

I don't keep up with many new middle grade books now that I've mostly stepped out of the library world. Knowing that I'm only going to read a few this year, I'm glad Let's Pretend We Never Met is one that happened to come across my radar. It's a book I would have loved as a kid, and one that I would absolutely feel comfortable having my own girls read in a few years. The writing is good, the characters feel real, the moral is clear but not preachy, and it is enjoyable to read.

This review also appears on my blog, Read-at-Home Mom.

[Debra Anton · Rating 4 out of 5]

A lovely book about being brave enough to be friends with the so-called weird kid. Yes, that may sound harsh, but junior high can be a harsh place. Author Melissa Walker trusts that her readers will know it would have been easier for main character Mattie to walk away from her friendship with Agnes P. Davis. Except Mattie doesn't want to--Agnes means a lot to her. So, taking a lesson from her grandmother ("kindness creates confidence"), Mattie takes the first step to making her friendship with Agnes public and--by extension--including her in her group of more mainstream friends. Mattie's first-person narration draws us closer, and there's some lovely writing, too: "It's getting to be that golden time, though, when the sky looks yellow pink and any patch of light that gets in through the windows really heats up the room. . . . I watch tiny dust particles float around in the sunbeam."

[Debbie · Rating 5 out of 5]

- What Defines True Friendship? -
Synopsis:
Mattie and her family move from North Carolina to Philadelphia to be near her grandmother. Any move can be tough, but this move is in the middle of the school year during winter break. The family settles into an apartment building where Mattie discovers an 11-year-old lives next door to her: Agnes P. Davis, who is creative, quirky, exuberant and fun to be with. They will be attending the same classroom. Meanwhile, Mattie's father is working long hours at his new job, and her mother can't find work which is taking a toll on the family.

Eventually, winter break is over and Mattie is faced with the challenge of fitting into an already established classroom. Agnes misses the first three days of school since she’s discovered an abandoned baby bird that she feels needs to be looked after.

As Mattie begins to make friends in her class and even a boyfriend, she has a new challenge. Her good friend Agnes P. Davis, who has by now returned to school, is so unique and in many ways considered odd, that Mattie has to decide if she will acknowledge that she is friends with Agnes. By doing that she will no doubt risk losing the friends she has made since they are very opinionated about their feelings toward Agnes, as is the whole class.

Though most adults in the story can quickly see that Agnes is sweet even with some unusual qualities like having no filters at times, not wanting to be touched, and being very knowledgeable as well as examining things in more detail than most her age, the students are threatened by her quirkiness. Though it never says it in the book, it feels like some of her behaviors indicate a degree of autism.

Cons: None

Pros: This is a wonderful story to read in a classroom setting since it can open lots of discussions. And, of course, I would recommend it to individual children 8 - 12 as well. The characters feel real with honest dilemmas that students’ are many times faced with. I think the main point of this story is not to point out the exact cause of Agnes' unique differences to most, rather that she be valued for the child she is.

I highly recommend this book.

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[Emily · Rating 4 out of 5]

I'd say 5th grade and up for this read. It reminded me of Wonder but instead of physical differences, Agnes has social differences. The word "autism" is never written, but we read of how Agnes is "special", "extraordinary". We do read that she goes to therapy for help dealing with anxiety. She is a lovable girl, and when Mattie moves in next door, she also finds Agnes to be a fun, despite quirky, friend. It's when school starts that the rubber hits the road, and Mattie has to decide if she'll let others know that she's friends with Agnes. Great story, great characters. A theme fleshed out in the end: People are treasures.

[Ingrid · Rating 4 out of 5]

Maddie moves in the middle of sixth grade and gets to know Agnes, her neighbor before school begins. Agnes is quirky and seems to have an anxiety disorder, but she and Maddie get along well. But when Maddie goes to school she discovers that no one likes Agnes. Things get complicated for Maddie because she would like to be popular and that means staying away from Agnes. Maddie does a lot of soul searching and is true to herself. In real life things don't always turn out so well, but I would like to think that Maddie's character could be a role model for students struggling with including classmates who may suffer from a disability.

[fai · Rating 5 out of 5]

I LOVE THIS BOOK!

i love the friendship in this story! lots of things u can learn from the family and friendship.

but i do understand why mattie feels like she need to be just normal and sometimes feel ashamed to be friend with someone different bcs she doesn’t know yet, at the end its good to know that she and her school friends actually wrong some how. and having someone who could be u, feel safe and comfortable is really a good feelings.

i like how the writer put awareness about social anxiety/anxiety and how it could affect them with their daily life or in any situation. i hope more people aware and give support to these people who having a hard time.

[Misti · Rating 4 out of 5]

Moving from North Carolina to Philadelphia in the middle of her sixth grade year is hard for Mattie, but she knows that her family is moving because her beloved grandmother needs their support. In their new apartment, Mattie soon befriends Agnes, who is smart and creative but occasionally a little bit odd. Mattie loves playing with Agnes during the holiday break (even though she would have said she's too old for "playing"), but what will happen to their friendship when school resumes?

Complex characters and honest treatment of difficult issues make for an engaging read. Recommended.

[Betsy · Rating 4 out of 5]

A great middle school story about real issues in friendship and discovering about yourself. I enjoyed how honest the characters were. Mattie knew that Agnes acted weird and that the other kids at school might not understand her, but she also knew that she enjoyed hanging out with her. It's tough being the new kid - you don't know who to hang around with or how to act. I liked the substory with the grandma - that could be a book on its own, so I was glad Melissa Walker didn't delve too much into it or it would have taken away from the main story.

[Stephanie · Rating 4 out of 5]

After moving to Philadelphia with her parents to be closer to her ailing grandmother, Mattie befriends Agnes, the unique girl in the apartment next door. Agnes is smart, creative, artistic... but definitely odd. And while that's ok when they're just hanging out at home, Mattie is uncomfortable claiming their friendship when school starts and she realizes just what an outcast Agnes is. I appreciate that Mattie is a flawed character, because that makes her very real. This reminded me a little of Stargirl by Spinelli.

[Emily · Rating 5 out of 5]

Let's pretend We never Met was a very good book. It was about middle-schooler Mattie Markham who had to move in the middle of the school year to a new school, house to help out her grandmother. Mattie goes on to meet her neighbor Agnes who is a stranger than most kids she goes to school with. I recommend this book to anyone who enjoys reading about middle school or people who like books with humor.

[Madison Cole · Rating 4 out of 5]

A very good book about the importance of friendship and not turning your back on someone. This girl Mattie moves to a new place. She starts a completely new life. Mattie meets this girl, Agnes in her apartment complex. They become very good friends. Once Mattie makes new friends at her school, she starts to leave out and ignore Agnes. Mattie gets involved in an activities club with those friends. Does Mattie end up rebuilding her friendship with Agnes?

[Debbi Florence · Rating 5 out of 5]

A sweet middle grade read about friendship and family. When 11yo Mattie has to move from her forever home in NC to Philly, she's upset about leaving behind her two best friends, especially in the middle of the school year. When she quickly makes friends with a quirky neighbor at her new apartment complex, Mattie is relieved, until she starts to notice her new friend's sometimes odd behavior. A story about exploring new friendships and being true to your heart, despite what others may think.

[Bees · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book is very relatable! She's not with the lowly kids, who get bullied, and she's not with the high and mighty princesses. Yet no matter what you do or who you are, there will be standards.Very fun, very modern, and not going by what regular middle school books say. I love it, and the ending was great!