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Memento Amare
"Thank you for giving me the chance to love you. And for giving yourself the chance to love you, too."
Agent Phelan Cole of the Global Anti Terrorist Force, one of the most respected and feared men in the classified military counter-terrorism and intelligence agency, is secretly and happily married to fellow agent Clyde Barnett. With their romantic relationship and marriage concealed from other agents, Cole and Clyde will face the greatest threat yet to their love for each other: A mission in the Eastern European country of Croenia leads to Clyde losing all his memories of Cole ... and reverting back to the gay man with severe internalized homophobia that he was before he met Cole, an openly bisexual man accepting of his own sexual orientation.
While the agency's intimidating Research & Development department races against time to reverse engineer the device that caused Clyde's amnesia, Cole is also racing against time to save his marriage and bring back his beloved best friend, lover and husband. Will Cole succeed in saving his husband? Or will he lose everything, even his own life?
_________________________________
Memento Amare is a standalone, 130,000+ word, gay romance novel by G. D. Cox. It has a guaranteed HEA ending.
Agent Phelan Cole of the Global Anti Terrorist Force, one of the most respected and feared men in the classified military counter-terrorism and intelligence agency, is secretly and happily married to fellow agent Clyde Barnett. With their romantic relationship and marriage concealed from other agents, Cole and Clyde will face the greatest threat yet to their love for each other: A mission in the Eastern European country of Croenia leads to Clyde losing all his memories of Cole ... and reverting back to the gay man with severe internalized homophobia that he was before he met Cole, an openly bisexual man accepting of his own sexual orientation.
While the agency's intimidating Research & Development department races against time to reverse engineer the device that caused Clyde's amnesia, Cole is also racing against time to save his marriage and bring back his beloved best friend, lover and husband. Will Cole succeed in saving his husband? Or will he lose everything, even his own life?
_________________________________
Memento Amare is a standalone, 130,000+ word, gay romance novel by G. D. Cox. It has a guaranteed HEA ending.
379 pages, Kindle Edition
First published August 14, 2017
6 people are currently reading
153 people want to read
About the author
G.D. Cox
2 books10 followersG. D. Cox has been imagining, telling and writing stories for as long as they can remember. An obsessed writer by day and an avid reader by night, they discovered their passion for writing gay romance in 2012 and hasn’t stopped writing it ever since. When they’re not writing or reading or spending time with their beloved piebald French bulldog, they’re sleeping and dreaming of their next story to tell.
Email: gdcoxauthor@gmail.com
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Facebook: www.facebook.com/gdcoxauthorpage
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Email: gdcoxauthor@gmail.com
Tumblr: gdcoxauthor.tumblr.com
Facebook: www.facebook.com/gdcoxauthorpage
Newsletter: eepurl.com/c1ljTD
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 35 reviews
December 31, 2019
4 Hearts!
For one who loves a military/spy/action thriller, this story ticked off many boxes. When both MC’s work for the same covert operation and are equally tough alpha males? Even better.
As per the blurb, this is about Phelan Cole, who’s basically the top dog at an elite anti-terrorist agency set on destroying evil in all its many forms. Phelan knows by experience that the world out there isn’t kind; it’s cruel, unfair, and full of horrible potential. Thus, Phelan’s dedicated his life to fighting such and to his amazement, he’s lucky enough to find his one true love amidst the madness and chaos. Still, Phelan’s love for Clyde Barnett is not an easy one. Clyde, has many issues, as he’s has been conditioned since he was a child that any weakness, let alone not being heterosexual, is absolutely forbidden. He’s had that literally beaten into him over and over again, where his first instinct is to hate what’s different and all that is associated with the hidden part of himself that even he can’t admit to. However, through his employment at the agency, Clyde’s exposed to Phelan through their working partnership, and eventually they become friends, then lovers, and ultimately husbands - a relationship that slowly unravels Clyde’s own self hatred and deeply ingrained homophobia. Of course, what results is something glorious.
Now the reason why I love tough alphas who are nigh indestructible is because the only thing that can humble them is love. It can bring them to their knees, making them vulnerable, making them ooey gooey and dripping with so much sap that I just can’t not melt along with them, and that’s what happens here. That’s what happens to these two intimidating, skillfully deadly men who only show their weaknesses and true selves to each other. That’s some freaking fantastic fabulousness if you know what I mean. So, when Clyde’s memories of his beloved Phelan are erased, the fallout is absolutely devastating.
Is this book perfect? Hell no. Topmost, it is loooooong, and many know I try to avoid such as much as possible. It is also quite repetitive, mostly in key phrases and themes, as well as an over abundance of self reflection. I’m also not smart enough to say exactly what pov this is written in, but this is not a typical book that unfolds linearly. It’s definitely more a telling than a showing which I know will bother some, so I recommend reading the sample and seeing if it works for you because the writing remains consistently so in that particular format. After a while though, the story caught me, and I just wanted to know more and more as info was doled out in pieces, jumping between past and present, between Phelan and Clyde, revealing a story that was quite impressive.
As a warning, Phelan and Clyde literally go through emotional and physical hell to get their happy ending, and it was painful. However, I’ll never complain when a book can show just how strong the feels are between two people and how that love can inspire one to do amazing things and accomplish the impossible, but mostly in how it breaks down barriers both external and internal, which is obviously the ideal in what its superpower can be. What’s particularly intense is Clyde’s journey. Phelan’s love is nothing short of revelatory and life altering for him, and it’s something he never wants to be without.
So, what makes the lasting impression for me of course, is the intense love between Phelan and Clyde. Their love is the catalyst to everything they do and everything they say because the other completes them, and that appealed strongly to the always hungry romantic in me. These two hard, stoic and sometimes scary men, who can basically kill with a look, would sacrifice their very lives for each other. Despite several faults to this book, it hammers the message home. Ultimately, nothing can come between Phelan and Clyde - not self doubt, not personal demons or hang ups, not near death, not even memory loss. Nothing. They will prevail and win! Keep that in mind when reading this and don’t lose faith!
Thank you to the author/publisher for a copy in exchange for a honest review
For one who loves a military/spy/action thriller, this story ticked off many boxes. When both MC’s work for the same covert operation and are equally tough alpha males? Even better.
As per the blurb, this is about Phelan Cole, who’s basically the top dog at an elite anti-terrorist agency set on destroying evil in all its many forms. Phelan knows by experience that the world out there isn’t kind; it’s cruel, unfair, and full of horrible potential. Thus, Phelan’s dedicated his life to fighting such and to his amazement, he’s lucky enough to find his one true love amidst the madness and chaos. Still, Phelan’s love for Clyde Barnett is not an easy one. Clyde, has many issues, as he’s has been conditioned since he was a child that any weakness, let alone not being heterosexual, is absolutely forbidden. He’s had that literally beaten into him over and over again, where his first instinct is to hate what’s different and all that is associated with the hidden part of himself that even he can’t admit to. However, through his employment at the agency, Clyde’s exposed to Phelan through their working partnership, and eventually they become friends, then lovers, and ultimately husbands - a relationship that slowly unravels Clyde’s own self hatred and deeply ingrained homophobia. Of course, what results is something glorious.
Now the reason why I love tough alphas who are nigh indestructible is because the only thing that can humble them is love. It can bring them to their knees, making them vulnerable, making them ooey gooey and dripping with so much sap that I just can’t not melt along with them, and that’s what happens here. That’s what happens to these two intimidating, skillfully deadly men who only show their weaknesses and true selves to each other. That’s some freaking fantastic fabulousness if you know what I mean. So, when Clyde’s memories of his beloved Phelan are erased, the fallout is absolutely devastating.
Is this book perfect? Hell no. Topmost, it is loooooong, and many know I try to avoid such as much as possible. It is also quite repetitive, mostly in key phrases and themes, as well as an over abundance of self reflection. I’m also not smart enough to say exactly what pov this is written in, but this is not a typical book that unfolds linearly. It’s definitely more a telling than a showing which I know will bother some, so I recommend reading the sample and seeing if it works for you because the writing remains consistently so in that particular format. After a while though, the story caught me, and I just wanted to know more and more as info was doled out in pieces, jumping between past and present, between Phelan and Clyde, revealing a story that was quite impressive.
As a warning, Phelan and Clyde literally go through emotional and physical hell to get their happy ending, and it was painful. However, I’ll never complain when a book can show just how strong the feels are between two people and how that love can inspire one to do amazing things and accomplish the impossible, but mostly in how it breaks down barriers both external and internal, which is obviously the ideal in what its superpower can be. What’s particularly intense is Clyde’s journey. Phelan’s love is nothing short of revelatory and life altering for him, and it’s something he never wants to be without.
So, what makes the lasting impression for me of course, is the intense love between Phelan and Clyde. Their love is the catalyst to everything they do and everything they say because the other completes them, and that appealed strongly to the always hungry romantic in me. These two hard, stoic and sometimes scary men, who can basically kill with a look, would sacrifice their very lives for each other. Despite several faults to this book, it hammers the message home. Ultimately, nothing can come between Phelan and Clyde - not self doubt, not personal demons or hang ups, not near death, not even memory loss. Nothing. They will prevail and win! Keep that in mind when reading this and don’t lose faith!
Thank you to the author/publisher for a copy in exchange for a honest review
August 3, 2018
***4.5 Stars***
And the title of this book says it all: it's all about the memories...
This is the story of Phelan and Clyde, best friends, lovers and husbands and their journey to get it all back when fate - or maybe I should rather say some terrorists - rips them apart. It also conveys a message. A message that you sometimes cannot keep your promise of forever despite your best intentions, because there are some things you just cannot control.
Before you all get overly excited now, be aware that this book is certainly not for everyone. It's rather award-worthy in the category 'you either love or hate it' and I'm sure it will raise pretty controversial reactions, as we have seen first hand during our buddy read when one of us sadly had to throw in the towel.
Usually, I'm the first to yell bloody murder when it comes to flashbacks in a book. They are a sure bet to yank me out of the story and this book is virtually one giant accumulation of flashbacks. Surprisingly enough, the author's way of storytelling by using a non-linear approach worked for me. And not only worked, it kept me intrigued and I couldn't read fast enough to figure out what I'm reading right now. At what stage of Phelan and Clyde's life I'm at. Damn, I never read a book with so many cliffhanger throughout a story. (Okay, let's pause for a moment for an honorable mention here: Josy deserves credit for coming up with this thought first, but I totally agree with her. ;-) ).
In the end it all makes sense, even the unusual take on the storyline. Like I said earlier, this book is all about the memories and let's be honest here, whose memories are in chronological order? It definitely took a bit to get used to the writing style and it certainly helped that we could discuss everything during our BR. There are thoughts of the characters put in brackets, there are some repetitions of certain phrases that drove me nuts at the beginning, but they just added to the charm of the book for me eventually.
What kept me engrossed in the story was also the setting. When we began to read, I didn't know that this is the extended version of a fanfiction, but right from the start, for me it had an Avengers-like feel to it. And let me tell you, I just love these guys. You'll get advanced cloaking technology that can hide skyscrapers. Clyde wears a black and red leather and spandex outfit and his and Phelan's boss, Nate Fabry, a giant man with dark skin and a scar on the left side of his face, wears a long black leather coat. Does that ring a bell? :-) And it's not even just the appearance: I had an epiphany while standing in my bathroom (yeah, don't ask!), that even the names do sound familiar and similar to those of the Avengers. So, yeah, I was hooked... ;-)
Add in the feels and some amazing side characters and I was a goner. And not only me. Josy and I are totally on the same page as to the rating and we both decided to go with 4.5 stars rounded up, because a book that made us cry so much definitely deserves it. Especially during the last 10% it was hard to read through all those tears and the virtual hugs of our buddy read besties were needed and much appreciated. So, another special Thank You goes to Karen for her moral support and to Josy and Christelle for reading this with me (even if it was rather short on Christelle's part, but her stalking and research skills are fabulous! ;-) ).
EDIT: Please heed the trigger warnings at the beginning of the book!
Life brings tears, smiles & memories.
The tears dry,
the smiles fade,
but the memories last forever.
And the title of this book says it all: it's all about the memories...
This is the story of Phelan and Clyde, best friends, lovers and husbands and their journey to get it all back when fate - or maybe I should rather say some terrorists - rips them apart. It also conveys a message. A message that you sometimes cannot keep your promise of forever despite your best intentions, because there are some things you just cannot control.
Truly, this is the way his whole world ends: not with a bang, but with a creak and a whimper.
Before you all get overly excited now, be aware that this book is certainly not for everyone. It's rather award-worthy in the category 'you either love or hate it' and I'm sure it will raise pretty controversial reactions, as we have seen first hand during our buddy read when one of us sadly had to throw in the towel.
Usually, I'm the first to yell bloody murder when it comes to flashbacks in a book. They are a sure bet to yank me out of the story and this book is virtually one giant accumulation of flashbacks. Surprisingly enough, the author's way of storytelling by using a non-linear approach worked for me. And not only worked, it kept me intrigued and I couldn't read fast enough to figure out what I'm reading right now. At what stage of Phelan and Clyde's life I'm at. Damn, I never read a book with so many cliffhanger throughout a story. (Okay, let's pause for a moment for an honorable mention here: Josy deserves credit for coming up with this thought first, but I totally agree with her. ;-) ).
In the end it all makes sense, even the unusual take on the storyline. Like I said earlier, this book is all about the memories and let's be honest here, whose memories are in chronological order? It definitely took a bit to get used to the writing style and it certainly helped that we could discuss everything during our BR. There are thoughts of the characters put in brackets, there are some repetitions of certain phrases that drove me nuts at the beginning, but they just added to the charm of the book for me eventually.
What kept me engrossed in the story was also the setting. When we began to read, I didn't know that this is the extended version of a fanfiction, but right from the start, for me it had an Avengers-like feel to it. And let me tell you, I just love these guys. You'll get advanced cloaking technology that can hide skyscrapers. Clyde wears a black and red leather and spandex outfit and his and Phelan's boss, Nate Fabry, a giant man with dark skin and a scar on the left side of his face, wears a long black leather coat. Does that ring a bell? :-) And it's not even just the appearance: I had an epiphany while standing in my bathroom (yeah, don't ask!), that even the names do sound familiar and similar to those of the Avengers. So, yeah, I was hooked... ;-)
Add in the feels and some amazing side characters and I was a goner. And not only me. Josy and I are totally on the same page as to the rating and we both decided to go with 4.5 stars rounded up, because a book that made us cry so much definitely deserves it. Especially during the last 10% it was hard to read through all those tears and the virtual hugs of our buddy read besties were needed and much appreciated. So, another special Thank You goes to Karen for her moral support and to Josy and Christelle for reading this with me (even if it was rather short on Christelle's part, but her stalking and research skills are fabulous! ;-) ).
EDIT: Please heed the trigger warnings at the beginning of the book!
Read
November 18, 2017No rating because it’s a DNF at 36%.
Saying there is no linearity in the story telling is a major understatement. It constantly jumps back and forth from one scene to another in a complete disarray. The numerous use of additional comments into brackets (76 times during these 36%) didn’t help. Add the fact that one of the MCs suffers at one point from amnesia….and right from the start, it’s a hardship to put everything back together. So much that, after a while, I started feeling disconnected. Too much deconstruction kills the construction !
Which is a shame because even in this state, I could feel the potential for a gripping tale. The world building is interesting : a mix of spy/secret missions/Snake eyes meets the Green Arrow and Morpheus. And I have no doubt there may be some strong connection and deep feelings between the MCs that could have swooned me.
However, I had to work so hard figuring out what I was reading and waiting for situations and attitudes to make sense that it ruined the experience.
Finally, on a personal level : less is often more.
So yes, with no hope in sight for an interacting line sent in my direction after more than 1/3 of the reading done, I dejectedly decided to throw the towel.
Saying there is no linearity in the story telling is a major understatement. It constantly jumps back and forth from one scene to another in a complete disarray. The numerous use of additional comments into brackets (76 times during these 36%) didn’t help. Add the fact that one of the MCs suffers at one point from amnesia….and right from the start, it’s a hardship to put everything back together. So much that, after a while, I started feeling disconnected. Too much deconstruction kills the construction !
Which is a shame because even in this state, I could feel the potential for a gripping tale. The world building is interesting : a mix of spy/secret missions/Snake eyes meets the Green Arrow and Morpheus. And I have no doubt there may be some strong connection and deep feelings between the MCs that could have swooned me.
However, I had to work so hard figuring out what I was reading and waiting for situations and attitudes to make sense that it ruined the experience.
Finally, on a personal level : less is often more.
So yes, with no hope in sight for an interacting line sent in my direction after more than 1/3 of the reading done, I dejectedly decided to throw the towel.
September 18, 2017
4.5 Stars
I'd never heard of G.D Cox but I'll now be checking for anything I can find. This was a pretty amazing story, very unusual in style but filled with emotional, fearful and angry moments that made the loving and hopeful moments all the more touching. It felt almost dystopian at times, even though it's contemporary, since it's centered around an ultra-secret agency with access to unheard of technology. Agents Phelan Cole and Clyde Barnett, as well as their boss and good friend, Nathan "Nate" Fabry and several team members, are super agents that can kill you with projectile tie clips, and even their own fingernails. So it's a little fantastical but not outrageously so. The story belongs to Phelan and Clyde, and follows their history and unexpected obstacles as a couple. I loved this couple and the feels from the two of them are incredible.
The composition of the book was unique; at least it's not a style I recall reading before. There is a beginning prologue, that introduces Phelan but the story is related, for the most part, in non-linear, non-chronological order. But it was done so well! I was not confused at all by it, except in a minor way once or twice. There are switches in POV at times and it moves back and forth from present to past by chapters. It was a bit strange, reading one passage and then going back or forwards in time in the next, knowing what was going to happen, yet still being surprised with new details. It has a very clear beginning and ending however. The secondary characters were fantastic, especially Phelan's Ma and Pa and also the bevy of agents and Nate, their leader.
I had to consider whether I would have preferred it written in a more conventional style, but I don't think it would have the same impact. It has a few exciting and dangerous scenes, a few that were a little gruesome but more than anything it's an epic love story. Be sure and read the author's preface, it explains the story's history. I highly, highly recommend this book if you enjoy your romance with some suspense and angst. The payoff at the end is soooo worth every moment!
An ARC was provided to me via Hearts On Fire Reviews in return for an honest opinion*
I'd never heard of G.D Cox but I'll now be checking for anything I can find. This was a pretty amazing story, very unusual in style but filled with emotional, fearful and angry moments that made the loving and hopeful moments all the more touching. It felt almost dystopian at times, even though it's contemporary, since it's centered around an ultra-secret agency with access to unheard of technology. Agents Phelan Cole and Clyde Barnett, as well as their boss and good friend, Nathan "Nate" Fabry and several team members, are super agents that can kill you with projectile tie clips, and even their own fingernails. So it's a little fantastical but not outrageously so. The story belongs to Phelan and Clyde, and follows their history and unexpected obstacles as a couple. I loved this couple and the feels from the two of them are incredible.
The composition of the book was unique; at least it's not a style I recall reading before. There is a beginning prologue, that introduces Phelan but the story is related, for the most part, in non-linear, non-chronological order. But it was done so well! I was not confused at all by it, except in a minor way once or twice. There are switches in POV at times and it moves back and forth from present to past by chapters. It was a bit strange, reading one passage and then going back or forwards in time in the next, knowing what was going to happen, yet still being surprised with new details. It has a very clear beginning and ending however. The secondary characters were fantastic, especially Phelan's Ma and Pa and also the bevy of agents and Nate, their leader.
I had to consider whether I would have preferred it written in a more conventional style, but I don't think it would have the same impact. It has a few exciting and dangerous scenes, a few that were a little gruesome but more than anything it's an epic love story. Be sure and read the author's preface, it explains the story's history. I highly, highly recommend this book if you enjoy your romance with some suspense and angst. The payoff at the end is soooo worth every moment!
An ARC was provided to me via Hearts On Fire Reviews in return for an honest opinion*
January 5, 2018
I almost gave up on this book. And I’m so glad that I didn’t. A remarkable read. 4.5 stars rounded up.
Thank you for not giving up on me, he murmurs to Phelan as they strip each other of their clothes, their armor, knowing that nothing can hurt them here, that they’re invincible as long as they have each other.
Thank you for loving me, he whispers to Phelan after they’ve made love yet again, as the sun rises above the city skyline and paints stripes of golden light across their sated bodies on their bed.
Thank you for loving me as I am.
Other reviews have noted the unconventional style – a non-linear narrative with copious amounts of flashbacks and flash forwards, and an occasional lack of clarity and conciseness. For some readers, it will be a deal breaker. And even as I thought it might be a deal breaker for me, I now believe that the narrative style was perfect for this book. You get a tantalizing glimpse of unfiltered feeling then are transported into another moment that becomes equally affecting. The emotion is purely and positively wrenching – the love, the desire, the desperation, the agony build and build. While reading this, I felt that ache. That literal, lingering ache in my chest.
The plot is on the unconventional side, too. Foreign terrorists wield a mysterious weapon that erases Clyde’s memories of his husband, Phelan. With the loss of those memories, Clyde also loses the self-acceptance that he gained upon reconciling his traumatic past, his repressed sexuality, his fear and self-loathing. Throw in Phelan and Clyde’s status as handler and asset at the Global Anti Terrorist Force, and you get dashes of adventure and intrigue. While their professional reputations present them as intimidating and lethal, we come to know the men behind those masks. There were some filler scenes that would have been better served with more relationship-focused or work-focused scenes, but overall Cox struck a great balance. Contrasting the “before” moments (their poignant exchange of vows) with the “after” moments (Phelan moving his toothbrush) slaaayed me.
A few chapters into this, I wouldn’t have imagined that I would become as invested as I did in Phelan, Clyde, and their happily-ever-after. The style admittedly won’t work for everyone, but it worked for me. If you can handle the initial bumps, I think that you’ll find it a worthy ride. I’m eager to read more from G.D. Cox!
Thank you for not giving up on me, he murmurs to Phelan as they strip each other of their clothes, their armor, knowing that nothing can hurt them here, that they’re invincible as long as they have each other.
Thank you for loving me, he whispers to Phelan after they’ve made love yet again, as the sun rises above the city skyline and paints stripes of golden light across their sated bodies on their bed.
Thank you for loving me as I am.
Other reviews have noted the unconventional style – a non-linear narrative with copious amounts of flashbacks and flash forwards, and an occasional lack of clarity and conciseness. For some readers, it will be a deal breaker. And even as I thought it might be a deal breaker for me, I now believe that the narrative style was perfect for this book. You get a tantalizing glimpse of unfiltered feeling then are transported into another moment that becomes equally affecting. The emotion is purely and positively wrenching – the love, the desire, the desperation, the agony build and build. While reading this, I felt that ache. That literal, lingering ache in my chest.
The plot is on the unconventional side, too. Foreign terrorists wield a mysterious weapon that erases Clyde’s memories of his husband, Phelan. With the loss of those memories, Clyde also loses the self-acceptance that he gained upon reconciling his traumatic past, his repressed sexuality, his fear and self-loathing. Throw in Phelan and Clyde’s status as handler and asset at the Global Anti Terrorist Force, and you get dashes of adventure and intrigue. While their professional reputations present them as intimidating and lethal, we come to know the men behind those masks. There were some filler scenes that would have been better served with more relationship-focused or work-focused scenes, but overall Cox struck a great balance. Contrasting the “before” moments (their poignant exchange of vows) with the “after” moments (Phelan moving his toothbrush) slaaayed me.
A few chapters into this, I wouldn’t have imagined that I would become as invested as I did in Phelan, Clyde, and their happily-ever-after. The style admittedly won’t work for everyone, but it worked for me. If you can handle the initial bumps, I think that you’ll find it a worthy ride. I’m eager to read more from G.D. Cox!
February 10, 2022
this had so much potential, but ended up being a very weak read. i really thought this was gonna be 5 stars before starting this book. 🤡 that's what i get for for having high hopes.
November 18, 2017
~ 4.5 stars ~
My amazing BR lady Simone wrote a great review that reflects all my thoughts and I encourage you to read it!
https://www.goodreads.com/review/show...
We had so much fun throughout this BR even though Christelle had to leave us early. She didn't like the book and this right there tells you that this is probably a love it/hate it book because the writing style is very different from what we usually encounter. In fact, it was the first time I've read a book that was set up like this: non-linear, meaning we are jumping back and forth in time without ever knowing when and where the next chapter will take part. At times, it was a little confusing (maybe year dates at the top of each chapter would have made it easier to read) but it was also fun trying to figure it all out. And in the end, it all fits together nicely and makes sense. You just have to be patient.
I think the story would have been just as great had it been written differently, but it was also nice to read something 'new'.
In addition, this story packs quite an emotional punch. I hadn't expected to be hit so hard but yes, I cried. A lot. Especially towards the end of the book. Damn all that dust that was in the air, lol!
A big thank you to Simone and also to Karen and Christelle, who added moral support and visual encouragement ;)
My amazing BR lady Simone wrote a great review that reflects all my thoughts and I encourage you to read it!
https://www.goodreads.com/review/show...
We had so much fun throughout this BR even though Christelle had to leave us early. She didn't like the book and this right there tells you that this is probably a love it/hate it book because the writing style is very different from what we usually encounter. In fact, it was the first time I've read a book that was set up like this: non-linear, meaning we are jumping back and forth in time without ever knowing when and where the next chapter will take part. At times, it was a little confusing (maybe year dates at the top of each chapter would have made it easier to read) but it was also fun trying to figure it all out. And in the end, it all fits together nicely and makes sense. You just have to be patient.
I think the story would have been just as great had it been written differently, but it was also nice to read something 'new'.
In addition, this story packs quite an emotional punch. I hadn't expected to be hit so hard but yes, I cried. A lot. Especially towards the end of the book. Damn all that dust that was in the air, lol!
A big thank you to Simone and also to Karen and Christelle, who added moral support and visual encouragement ;)
October 3, 2017
4.5 stars rounded up to 5 because still no 1/2 stars here on GR...seriously still...Dear GR, Christmas is coming...just sayin' ;)
So if reading the book was hard...
Writing the review may be damned near impossible. I could probably give you a laundry list of why this book shouldn't have worked because there is a bit of just about everything in this book that has at times driven me crazy while reading other books and yet somehow this time they either didn't bother me or they just made the story work and I mean work.
While the storyline in 'Memento Amare' may not seem that unusual it's a mystery/romance/spy/thriller type book what sets it apart for me is how the author has brought this story to life. First off this story covers a really long time period we first meet Phalen Cole when he's a very young child and by the end of this story both men are well in to their 50s/60s and what a life they've had. But I'm not even going to start with that because this would easily go from a review to a very lengthy essay because at 130,000+ words be prepared for a lengthy read but trust me it's so worth it.
So why shouldn't this story have worked well it's insta-love...sort of but not really. I'd probably call it more of an insta-attraction and when all was said and done it worked for me because while the attraction was instant acting on it wasn't. While insta-love's not really my thing this isn't the first book that I've read where the author made it work...so really, all in all this was a small niggle and like I said it worked because while it may seemed like insta-love these guys didn't automatically fall into bed and live happily ever.
The bigger issue and the one that really should have had me doing a DNF was how the story played out. We get alternating POVs from the MCs which this part I like. I often don't do well spending too much time in one MCs head but the part that surprised me was that when it comes to the time line it's not linear folks we're all over the map and I think this is probably the first story I've ever read where I can honestly say that at the end of it all this was in a lot of ways what probably made this story work so well. As we're taken through Phalen's life and his relationship with Clyde we are given this story both as it happens and through memories and flashbacks by both MCs. Sometimes these memories are revisited more than once but from a different perspective, but I have to admit It took me a bit of contemplation to figure out why I was ok with this and what I realized was that often times when a person reflects on their life or even recounts it to others memories aren't always given in a linear order but often tend to be related in relevance of what has happened in the present to make that memory become relevant or important to events or the person recalling it. So as I was reading this I realized that this ironically was also one of the reasons that I was becoming so engaged in the story because more important than a chronological time line I was getting things that as they became relevant to the story.
Most of this story actually takes place during the time that Cole and Clyde are members of the 'Global Anti Terrorist Force' or 'GATF' both Cole and Clyde's lives are woven in and what starts as a spy type story turns into an incredible love story filled with action and suspense that grabs the reader and wrenches on the heart. This is by no means the first book that's made me cry but it definitely is one of a select few that I can honestly say probably got as much teary time from me as not...seriously more than once I had to set this one aside because...too many tears to keep reading.
In spite of the fact that Cole and Clyde are agents for the GATF the most important mission that these two men have is the one to save their life together as partners and as the story unfolds what we see is that the strongest weapon in either man's arsenal are words...words offering love, promise, hope, trust, faith, salvation and in the end redemption...
On a separate but connected note the author has generously added a short story entitled...'Memento Amare: All About the Memories' that at 22 pages is short but sweet and fun to read after the emotional ride you take reading the book...oh, it's also free!
This one's definitely recommended and best read with tissues and teddies on standby.
********************
A copy of 'Momento Amare' was graciously provided by the author in exchange for an honest review.
So if reading the book was hard...
Writing the review may be damned near impossible. I could probably give you a laundry list of why this book shouldn't have worked because there is a bit of just about everything in this book that has at times driven me crazy while reading other books and yet somehow this time they either didn't bother me or they just made the story work and I mean work.
While the storyline in 'Memento Amare' may not seem that unusual it's a mystery/romance/spy/thriller type book what sets it apart for me is how the author has brought this story to life. First off this story covers a really long time period we first meet Phalen Cole when he's a very young child and by the end of this story both men are well in to their 50s/60s and what a life they've had. But I'm not even going to start with that because this would easily go from a review to a very lengthy essay because at 130,000+ words be prepared for a lengthy read but trust me it's so worth it.
So why shouldn't this story have worked well it's insta-love...sort of but not really. I'd probably call it more of an insta-attraction and when all was said and done it worked for me because while the attraction was instant acting on it wasn't. While insta-love's not really my thing this isn't the first book that I've read where the author made it work...so really, all in all this was a small niggle and like I said it worked because while it may seemed like insta-love these guys didn't automatically fall into bed and live happily ever.
The bigger issue and the one that really should have had me doing a DNF was how the story played out. We get alternating POVs from the MCs which this part I like. I often don't do well spending too much time in one MCs head but the part that surprised me was that when it comes to the time line it's not linear folks we're all over the map and I think this is probably the first story I've ever read where I can honestly say that at the end of it all this was in a lot of ways what probably made this story work so well. As we're taken through Phalen's life and his relationship with Clyde we are given this story both as it happens and through memories and flashbacks by both MCs. Sometimes these memories are revisited more than once but from a different perspective, but I have to admit It took me a bit of contemplation to figure out why I was ok with this and what I realized was that often times when a person reflects on their life or even recounts it to others memories aren't always given in a linear order but often tend to be related in relevance of what has happened in the present to make that memory become relevant or important to events or the person recalling it. So as I was reading this I realized that this ironically was also one of the reasons that I was becoming so engaged in the story because more important than a chronological time line I was getting things that as they became relevant to the story.
Most of this story actually takes place during the time that Cole and Clyde are members of the 'Global Anti Terrorist Force' or 'GATF' both Cole and Clyde's lives are woven in and what starts as a spy type story turns into an incredible love story filled with action and suspense that grabs the reader and wrenches on the heart. This is by no means the first book that's made me cry but it definitely is one of a select few that I can honestly say probably got as much teary time from me as not...seriously more than once I had to set this one aside because...too many tears to keep reading.
In spite of the fact that Cole and Clyde are agents for the GATF the most important mission that these two men have is the one to save their life together as partners and as the story unfolds what we see is that the strongest weapon in either man's arsenal are words...words offering love, promise, hope, trust, faith, salvation and in the end redemption...
"What does it say about this world that men are rewarded for killing another man, and punished for loving another?"'Momento Amare' is the first book that I've read by G. D. Cox. But I have to say given how much I enjoyed the interesting and unique journey that this author took us on I can't imagine that it will be the only one.
On a separate but connected note the author has generously added a short story entitled...'Memento Amare: All About the Memories' that at 22 pages is short but sweet and fun to read after the emotional ride you take reading the book...oh, it's also free!
This one's definitely recommended and best read with tissues and teddies on standby.
********************
A copy of 'Momento Amare' was graciously provided by the author in exchange for an honest review.
November 30, 2017
A complimentary copy was provided by the author via the MM romance Group Don't Buy My Love Program in exchange for an honest review.
The blurb is what really got my attention with this book.
Government agency? Check
Office romance? Check
Amnesia? Check
Yep, this book ticked all the boxes. And then I opened the book up and was like, Holy Sh!t there are a lot chapters! Thankfully some of those chapters were only 1 or 2 pages long, whew! But OMG that's a lot of text. And being honest here, most (possibly half or more) of the book could have been cut/edited out and the story would have stayed the same.
I'll get more in depth in a minute. I want to take a moment to say, yes, for the most part I enjoyed the story. Strictly speaking the writing is good/okay and the premise to the story is interesting. Very sci-fi - futuristic, James Bond, Mission Impossible like government agency, with the agents being attacked left and right, surviving countless attacks and captures and torture sessions. Eye rolling commence.
As for the story itself, it was very OTT with the angst and forced/pushed upon me trauma the characters were suffering from due to Clyde's memory loss. Their physical and emotional suffering was put out in excruciating detail and it came to a point where I skimmed most of it because OMG, I didn't need to read about it over and over. I understood that Cole was devastated.
Time shifting - yep I was warned, but I had not been fully prepared. There were moments within the same sentence that time shifted from past to future. From the Prologue:
I had a hard time following the timeline I was supposed to be in. In addition to this, time would shift from present day to a few days in the past present day, to years in the past, and back again. Talk about timeline whiplash. I feel this story would have had a much bigger impact had the timeline be more linear with occasional loops back in time, but they should be clearly marked with dates or least a year to give a good reference point.
The use of italics - whoa! At some point they lose all meaning.
Overall I rate this around 2.5 stars, maybe 2.65. I had so many issues (many I didn't discuss here) with this story. Since it didn't work for me I can't say I would recommend, but this is one persons opinion and I have not liked books before and everyone else LOVES them, so...make of that what you will.
A special thanks to the author for providing a complimentary copy and I hope you enjoy much success!
The blurb is what really got my attention with this book.
Government agency? Check
Office romance? Check
Amnesia? Check
Yep, this book ticked all the boxes. And then I opened the book up and was like, Holy Sh!t there are a lot chapters! Thankfully some of those chapters were only 1 or 2 pages long, whew! But OMG that's a lot of text. And being honest here, most (possibly half or more) of the book could have been cut/edited out and the story would have stayed the same.
I'll get more in depth in a minute. I want to take a moment to say, yes, for the most part I enjoyed the story. Strictly speaking the writing is good/okay and the premise to the story is interesting. Very sci-fi - futuristic, James Bond, Mission Impossible like government agency, with the agents being attacked left and right, surviving countless attacks and captures and torture sessions. Eye rolling commence.
As for the story itself, it was very OTT with the angst and forced/pushed upon me trauma the characters were suffering from due to Clyde's memory loss. Their physical and emotional suffering was put out in excruciating detail and it came to a point where I skimmed most of it because OMG, I didn't need to read about it over and over. I understood that Cole was devastated.
Time shifting - yep I was warned, but I had not been fully prepared. There were moments within the same sentence that time shifted from past to future. From the Prologue:
I had a hard time following the timeline I was supposed to be in. In addition to this, time would shift from present day to a few days in the past present day, to years in the past, and back again. Talk about timeline whiplash. I feel this story would have had a much bigger impact had the timeline be more linear with occasional loops back in time, but they should be clearly marked with dates or least a year to give a good reference point.
The use of italics - whoa! At some point they lose all meaning.
Overall I rate this around 2.5 stars, maybe 2.65. I had so many issues (many I didn't discuss here) with this story. Since it didn't work for me I can't say I would recommend, but this is one persons opinion and I have not liked books before and everyone else LOVES them, so...make of that what you will.
A special thanks to the author for providing a complimentary copy and I hope you enjoy much success!
September 19, 2017
2 stars
I had high hopes for this book. I had a really hard time following the character, time, & setting changes. It really slowed me down while reading and I kept having to figure out what, who, where I was reading about each different chapter, they are not marked. There is a lot of repetitive wording, repeat phrases here and there, that just became filler. For instance, each time the wedding rings are mentioned - we dont need to know the cut, style, and metal - that becomes clutter. I am not sure of the ratings this book is getting, I didn't check before I started reading it. It is already published and I think my little pet peeves may impact how others enjoy the story. I think this story was originally written in secctions, now it needs to be cleaned up and the excess weeded out. I normally don't comment much on this stuff because I am for the most part reading books not fully edited. This book however is live and therefore is subject to a little stronger comments on editing and filler words.
As for the story. It really has potential and could be a great sci-fi mind twisting read. There is even room for more in the future from these guys who do make a great couple. The problem is you have so much *filler* in the story to weed through before you get to the meat and potatoes of a great tale.
2 stars as is --
I had high hopes for this book. I had a really hard time following the character, time, & setting changes. It really slowed me down while reading and I kept having to figure out what, who, where I was reading about each different chapter, they are not marked. There is a lot of repetitive wording, repeat phrases here and there, that just became filler. For instance, each time the wedding rings are mentioned - we dont need to know the cut, style, and metal - that becomes clutter. I am not sure of the ratings this book is getting, I didn't check before I started reading it. It is already published and I think my little pet peeves may impact how others enjoy the story. I think this story was originally written in secctions, now it needs to be cleaned up and the excess weeded out. I normally don't comment much on this stuff because I am for the most part reading books not fully edited. This book however is live and therefore is subject to a little stronger comments on editing and filler words.
As for the story. It really has potential and could be a great sci-fi mind twisting read. There is even room for more in the future from these guys who do make a great couple. The problem is you have so much *filler* in the story to weed through before you get to the meat and potatoes of a great tale.
2 stars as is --
November 13, 2017
3.5 STARS rounded up to 4.
I really enjoyed this book, but it was really hard to read. The constant flashbacks left me disjointed and often times confused. I think this would've been a superb read if it had followed a normal progressing storyline.
I really enjoyed this book, but it was really hard to read. The constant flashbacks left me disjointed and often times confused. I think this would've been a superb read if it had followed a normal progressing storyline.
September 2, 2017
When a book has your heart pounding, your mouth drying up, before you've even gotten to chapter one because of its intensity? That's when you know it's going to be good, at least for this reader.
This is a 'climb in and strap down tight' kind of book to the 'umpth' degree.
I started writing this review before I'd even read five chapters. I had to....because I was feeling so much. Phelan and Cole's story is hard, it's brutal, it's epic, it's beautiful.
The story bounces around in time a lot and at first that confused me a bit but then....but then I got it, then I was grateful for it. Why? Because it softened the blow just a bit, took the razor sharp edge off the claws and made them , well, survivable. It kept your heart beating, although with a noose around it until, until, it finally crescendoed and became so bright, so beautiful, so perfect that it was almost too hard to witness. Almost. But if you want to see, want to feel one of the most amazing, most raw, most pure loves that you never thought existed.....then read this. You will never be the same. And how beautiful is that? I voluntarily reviewed a copy of this book.
This is a 'climb in and strap down tight' kind of book to the 'umpth' degree.
I started writing this review before I'd even read five chapters. I had to....because I was feeling so much. Phelan and Cole's story is hard, it's brutal, it's epic, it's beautiful.
The story bounces around in time a lot and at first that confused me a bit but then....but then I got it, then I was grateful for it. Why? Because it softened the blow just a bit, took the razor sharp edge off the claws and made them , well, survivable. It kept your heart beating, although with a noose around it until, until, it finally crescendoed and became so bright, so beautiful, so perfect that it was almost too hard to witness. Almost. But if you want to see, want to feel one of the most amazing, most raw, most pure loves that you never thought existed.....then read this. You will never be the same. And how beautiful is that? I voluntarily reviewed a copy of this book.
March 14, 2018
I received a free copy of this book in exchange for an honest review.
Memento Amare is something of a mixed bag. Its many flaws range from technical issues to a crippling myopia in terms of the content addressed in a novel in which its exaggerated length works very much against it but is still manages to have episodes that in themselves are quite interesting and even good. There is also a sense of inner coherence that is welcome as is the fact that it does try to tackle homophia, although in the simplest of terms, which is more than can be said for m/m as a whole.
As the author informs us in the forward, what came to be this novel was first fanfiction and unfortunately, it really shows. Despite a massive overhaul, there are recurring problems that stem directly from its origin and keep Memento from coming across as actual original fiction. This borderline fatal flaw is prominent in two areas that conspire to truly bring down what could have been exceptional: one, the text's insistence on italics that is nothing short of abusive as is the constant default to stock expressions that at some point go from thematic patterning and straight into redundancy; two, the very vague depiction of all things military and anti-terrorist, complete with failing to raise some important questions and occasionally going well into unintentional silly-mode.
This results in the reader coming across 'this vast, unfair world' several times per chapter while at the same time being expected to believe that assassin ninjas armed with, and I quote, 'honest-to-god poisoned, steel shurikens and ninjatō and electrified whips', are real. This disconnect with reality is damaging given the book's overall intent but only surfaces on occasion. The nature of the global anti-terrorist unit is much more problematic, on a structural level, and as such will be covered in greater detail further down the line.
Memento invests much of its creative energy in shaping the relationship between Phelon, the apparently no-nonsense but at heart very kind anti-terrorist expert and Clyde, the firebreather whose traumatic childhood has left him with severe homophic tendencies that becomes his subordinate, then lover. In order to accomplish this the perspective is spread across both these characters in an almost even manner, which was a wise decision, as it imparts a kind of equality to each member of the pair. It is also refreshing to meet protagonists in m/m who are both manly in terms of body type as all too often the genre goes for traditional masculine/traditional feminine models as if these were the end goal of all possibilities.
Said relationship, along with the entire novel, is recounting in a not lineral. It is nothing too experimental, though, the chronology is easy to follow but it does add a little bit of freshness. What it sacrifices in terms of suspense it may gain in depth since the text goes through the same events, at different points in time, showing their significance both when they happened and when they are revisited. Then again suspense was not the priority given that the novel spoils itself in the very description- and later in the introduction- by assuring the reader that it will have a happy ending.
Here too, however, one runs into problems. The main conflict includes Clyde losing all memories of Phelan, after they have actually been married for years. After a long, torturous path to accepting himself as gay and then becoming nothing short of married to a man, Clyde goes back to square one, into full blown homophia, when he wakes up one night next to Phelan whom he cannot at all remember.
This leads to much drama, most of which is actually well handled, but it suffers from being so extremely plot convenient that one finds it difficult to accept, anymore than the assassin ninjas. It is almost literal laser guided amnesia. What triggered it is a mysterious box that Clyde came into contact with in a mission in the fictional country of Croenia. At the very end there is an explation for this ever so ad hoc event but it may very may make things even worse.
Which leads me to role of the Global Anti Terrorist Force. It is stunning that given the subject theme Memento managed to almost entirely disregard 9/11; it is only mentioned once and even then as an aside. This amazing agency that one is repeatedly told is absolutely excellent and has a borderline flawless track record managed to let one of the most violent terrorist attacks on American soil happen, which is already a very big blemish, but it seemed to have not learned a single lesson as it up and built an invisible skyscraper in New York, towering over a hundred stories.
The absurdity is so patent that it is almost impressive how the novel does not have as much as a shred of self-awareness. It gets even worse, GATF, as it is usually referred to, has absurdly high standards for its operatives, Phelan having to go the hard route of army/Ranger etc but Clyde was apparently qualified to even be scouted- first against his will, even- despite not even having a high school diploma: it seems a lifetime in a circus in which he learned how to throw knives is qualification enough. This is never challenged as so strange as to be laughable, in fact, Clyde climbs up the ladder without even receiving a formal education that this agency could and very obviously should have been imparted on him.
This all comes round to the very unsavory implications that the novel seems utterly blind to. There is a great focus on 'good' people; these are the ones who work for GATF (unless they are meanies to Clyde, that is) while the 'evil' ones are either one-note homophobes or 'terrorists'. And if the homophes are at least identified and their goals made very explicit, the terrorists are an amorphous blub of 'evil'. It is never clear what their goals are- political? religious? A mixture of the two as is so often the case? Ethnic conflict?- but we know they are evil. That seems to suffice.
There is an implicit double standard that lurks in the novel's blindside, the ideological commitment that steeps the text itself serving as a buttress: the GATF uses torture and deploys all over the world, which is seen as entirely 'good'; but when the evil Croenians are the ones doing the torture then it is pointed out as most definitely 'evil'.
The problem is not so much that these are the assumptions on which the entire story is structured, but that said assumptions are never questioned, explained or at all explored. They are to be taken entirely for granted. It could very well be that this ill-defined work is actually doing more good than harm but the reader is shown none of this. Instead, 'Terrorism is evil, therefore anti-terrorism is always good', is the ruling- although not explicit- operative principle.
It is perhaps telling that Croenia is a made up country. It is almost as if the author, realizing at some level that this polarizing logic was highly problematic, shied away from having an actual group act as the incarnations of evil. The degree of vagueness over this country and its inhabitants is such that they are not even identified in terms of their ethnic makeup. The text seems reluctant to apply its own rules to the real world as that would come all too close to make this inchoate 'evil' take actual form in the world as we know it, with all the implications this entails.
Perhaps [b]Memento[/b] should have gone an alternate universe setting in which all of this spiky issues could have been if not entirely resolved then at least less salient and jarring.
With all this said, the novel is not without merit. When at the top of its game, it does inner conflict very well. It captures moments of emotional intimacy with a delicacy that belies its clumsy worldbuilding.
An editor would have done this novel wonders. The third act could have been chopped altogether as it devolves into the main characters gushing about each other, constantly, at any and all given opportunities, using the before mentioned stock-phrasing that seems to have infected them as well as the narrator. The convenient amnesia overflows into even convenient plot developments:
Overall, it is praise worthy that Memento tried to reach for something a little bit different. Its displacement of a central chronology gives it a certain modernity and while manipulative it does flesh out its main couple enough for the reader to see them as persons. The author shows enough potential and one can only hope that they will outgrow their fanfiction roots and move on to greater things in the future.
Memento Amare is something of a mixed bag. Its many flaws range from technical issues to a crippling myopia in terms of the content addressed in a novel in which its exaggerated length works very much against it but is still manages to have episodes that in themselves are quite interesting and even good. There is also a sense of inner coherence that is welcome as is the fact that it does try to tackle homophia, although in the simplest of terms, which is more than can be said for m/m as a whole.
As the author informs us in the forward, what came to be this novel was first fanfiction and unfortunately, it really shows. Despite a massive overhaul, there are recurring problems that stem directly from its origin and keep Memento from coming across as actual original fiction. This borderline fatal flaw is prominent in two areas that conspire to truly bring down what could have been exceptional: one, the text's insistence on italics that is nothing short of abusive as is the constant default to stock expressions that at some point go from thematic patterning and straight into redundancy; two, the very vague depiction of all things military and anti-terrorist, complete with failing to raise some important questions and occasionally going well into unintentional silly-mode.
This results in the reader coming across 'this vast, unfair world' several times per chapter while at the same time being expected to believe that assassin ninjas armed with, and I quote, 'honest-to-god poisoned, steel shurikens and ninjatō and electrified whips', are real. This disconnect with reality is damaging given the book's overall intent but only surfaces on occasion. The nature of the global anti-terrorist unit is much more problematic, on a structural level, and as such will be covered in greater detail further down the line.
Memento invests much of its creative energy in shaping the relationship between Phelon, the apparently no-nonsense but at heart very kind anti-terrorist expert and Clyde, the firebreather whose traumatic childhood has left him with severe homophic tendencies that becomes his subordinate, then lover. In order to accomplish this the perspective is spread across both these characters in an almost even manner, which was a wise decision, as it imparts a kind of equality to each member of the pair. It is also refreshing to meet protagonists in m/m who are both manly in terms of body type as all too often the genre goes for traditional masculine/traditional feminine models as if these were the end goal of all possibilities.
Said relationship, along with the entire novel, is recounting in a not lineral. It is nothing too experimental, though, the chronology is easy to follow but it does add a little bit of freshness. What it sacrifices in terms of suspense it may gain in depth since the text goes through the same events, at different points in time, showing their significance both when they happened and when they are revisited. Then again suspense was not the priority given that the novel spoils itself in the very description- and later in the introduction- by assuring the reader that it will have a happy ending.
Here too, however, one runs into problems. The main conflict includes Clyde losing all memories of Phelan, after they have actually been married for years. After a long, torturous path to accepting himself as gay and then becoming nothing short of married to a man, Clyde goes back to square one, into full blown homophia, when he wakes up one night next to Phelan whom he cannot at all remember.
This leads to much drama, most of which is actually well handled, but it suffers from being so extremely plot convenient that one finds it difficult to accept, anymore than the assassin ninjas. It is almost literal laser guided amnesia. What triggered it is a mysterious box that Clyde came into contact with in a mission in the fictional country of Croenia. At the very end there is an explation for this ever so ad hoc event but it may very may make things even worse.
Which leads me to role of the Global Anti Terrorist Force. It is stunning that given the subject theme Memento managed to almost entirely disregard 9/11; it is only mentioned once and even then as an aside. This amazing agency that one is repeatedly told is absolutely excellent and has a borderline flawless track record managed to let one of the most violent terrorist attacks on American soil happen, which is already a very big blemish, but it seemed to have not learned a single lesson as it up and built an invisible skyscraper in New York, towering over a hundred stories.
The absurdity is so patent that it is almost impressive how the novel does not have as much as a shred of self-awareness. It gets even worse, GATF, as it is usually referred to, has absurdly high standards for its operatives, Phelan having to go the hard route of army/Ranger etc but Clyde was apparently qualified to even be scouted- first against his will, even- despite not even having a high school diploma: it seems a lifetime in a circus in which he learned how to throw knives is qualification enough. This is never challenged as so strange as to be laughable, in fact, Clyde climbs up the ladder without even receiving a formal education that this agency could and very obviously should have been imparted on him.
This all comes round to the very unsavory implications that the novel seems utterly blind to. There is a great focus on 'good' people; these are the ones who work for GATF (unless they are meanies to Clyde, that is) while the 'evil' ones are either one-note homophobes or 'terrorists'. And if the homophes are at least identified and their goals made very explicit, the terrorists are an amorphous blub of 'evil'. It is never clear what their goals are- political? religious? A mixture of the two as is so often the case? Ethnic conflict?- but we know they are evil. That seems to suffice.
There is an implicit double standard that lurks in the novel's blindside, the ideological commitment that steeps the text itself serving as a buttress: the GATF uses torture and deploys all over the world, which is seen as entirely 'good'; but when the evil Croenians are the ones doing the torture then it is pointed out as most definitely 'evil'.
The problem is not so much that these are the assumptions on which the entire story is structured, but that said assumptions are never questioned, explained or at all explored. They are to be taken entirely for granted. It could very well be that this ill-defined work is actually doing more good than harm but the reader is shown none of this. Instead, 'Terrorism is evil, therefore anti-terrorism is always good', is the ruling- although not explicit- operative principle.
It is perhaps telling that Croenia is a made up country. It is almost as if the author, realizing at some level that this polarizing logic was highly problematic, shied away from having an actual group act as the incarnations of evil. The degree of vagueness over this country and its inhabitants is such that they are not even identified in terms of their ethnic makeup. The text seems reluctant to apply its own rules to the real world as that would come all too close to make this inchoate 'evil' take actual form in the world as we know it, with all the implications this entails.
Perhaps [b]Memento[/b] should have gone an alternate universe setting in which all of this spiky issues could have been if not entirely resolved then at least less salient and jarring.
With all this said, the novel is not without merit. When at the top of its game, it does inner conflict very well. It captures moments of emotional intimacy with a delicacy that belies its clumsy worldbuilding.
An editor would have done this novel wonders. The third act could have been chopped altogether as it devolves into the main characters gushing about each other, constantly, at any and all given opportunities, using the before mentioned stock-phrasing that seems to have infected them as well as the narrator. The convenient amnesia overflows into even convenient plot developments:
Overall, it is praise worthy that Memento tried to reach for something a little bit different. Its displacement of a central chronology gives it a certain modernity and while manipulative it does flesh out its main couple enough for the reader to see them as persons. The author shows enough potential and one can only hope that they will outgrow their fanfiction roots and move on to greater things in the future.
December 9, 2017
This awesome book was given in exchange for a review through
MM Romance :Don't buy my love group.
Memento is a book that I will remember for quite some time.
Read it in two goes. I had to take a breather. Finally finished it in early am.
This book was emotional. I connected to this book and it gave me emotional wiplash. Tears, laughter and a wee bit of snark.
Two super secret spies work together. Fall in love. The unthinkable happens,
and their world turns to sh*t. The cause.? Read and find out.
There is a hea so stupid stuff gets worked out. There is even some sexy times in there as well.
It is well written, jumps back and forth with time frames. But fills in the gaps.
Both guys chime in. That served this book well.
You will enjoy this book. It is a testament to the author 's creativity.
Remember this book is fictional. If you don't like it, tuff cookies for you.!
I will definetly read more by GD Cox. You should too.
This book was given to me for a honest and heartfelt review.
I think this rant covers that.
Enjoy the book. Grab some tissues. A cookie or two for emotional support
MM Romance :Don't buy my love group.
Memento is a book that I will remember for quite some time.
Read it in two goes. I had to take a breather. Finally finished it in early am.
This book was emotional. I connected to this book and it gave me emotional wiplash. Tears, laughter and a wee bit of snark.
Two super secret spies work together. Fall in love. The unthinkable happens,
and their world turns to sh*t. The cause.? Read and find out.
There is a hea so stupid stuff gets worked out. There is even some sexy times in there as well.
It is well written, jumps back and forth with time frames. But fills in the gaps.
Both guys chime in. That served this book well.
You will enjoy this book. It is a testament to the author 's creativity.
Remember this book is fictional. If you don't like it, tuff cookies for you.!
I will definetly read more by GD Cox. You should too.
This book was given to me for a honest and heartfelt review.
I think this rant covers that.
Enjoy the book. Grab some tissues. A cookie or two for emotional support
October 8, 2017
Even though the story focuses primarily on amnesia and its repercussions on an already established couple,this is one book that I will not be forgetting any time soon.
November 18, 2021
𝙒𝙝𝙖𝙩 𝙙𝙤𝙚𝙨 𝙞𝙩 𝙨𝙖𝙮 𝙖𝙗𝙤𝙪𝙩 𝙩𝙝𝙞𝙨 𝙬𝙤𝙧𝙡𝙙 𝙩𝙝𝙖𝙩 𝙢𝙚𝙣 𝙖𝙧𝙚 𝙧𝙚𝙬𝙖𝙧𝙙𝙚𝙙 𝙛𝙤𝙧 𝙠𝙞𝙡𝙡𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙖𝙣𝙤𝙩𝙝𝙚𝙧 𝙢𝙖𝙣, 𝙖𝙣𝙙 𝙥𝙪𝙣𝙞𝙨𝙝𝙚𝙙 𝙛𝙤𝙧 𝙡𝙤𝙫𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙖𝙣𝙤𝙩𝙝𝙚𝙧?
It took me a while to gather my composure back to write this review because I was an emotional mess after reading this book. This author really knows how to tug at ur heartstrings. I initially started this book thinking it was a military or law enforcement genre but it wasn't. I mean it was, it has two main characters who work in law enforcement (in a global level) but it wasn't about that. 𝗧𝗵𝗶𝘀 𝘄𝗮𝘀 𝗮 𝗽𝘂𝗿𝗲𝗹𝘆 𝗿𝗼𝗺𝗮𝗻𝘁𝗶𝗰, 𝗲𝗺𝗼𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻𝗮𝗹 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝗵𝗲𝗮𝗿𝘁 𝘁𝗼𝘂𝗰𝗵𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝘀𝘁𝗼𝗿𝘆 𝗼𝗳 𝗵𝗼𝘄 𝘁𝘄𝗼 𝗺𝗲𝗻 𝗺𝗲𝘁 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝗳𝗲𝗹𝗹 𝗶𝗻 𝗹𝗼𝘃𝗲 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝗳𝗲𝗹𝗹 𝗶𝗻 𝗹𝗼𝘃𝗲 𝗮𝗹𝗹 𝗼𝘃𝗲𝗿 𝗮𝗴𝗮𝗶𝗻 𝘁𝗵𝗿𝗼𝘂𝗴𝗵 𝘁𝗵𝗲𝗶𝗿 𝗺𝗲𝗺𝗼𝗿𝗶𝗲𝘀.
"𝙏𝙝𝙖𝙣𝙠 𝙮𝙤𝙪 𝙛𝙤𝙧 𝙜𝙞𝙫𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙢𝙚 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙘𝙝𝙖𝙣𝙘𝙚 𝙩𝙤 𝙡𝙤𝙫𝙚 𝙮𝙤𝙪. 𝘼𝙣𝙙 𝙛𝙤𝙧 ���𝙞𝙫𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙮𝙤𝙪𝙧𝙨𝙚𝙡𝙛 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙘𝙝𝙖𝙣𝙘𝙚 𝙩𝙤 𝙡𝙤𝙫𝙚 𝙮𝙤𝙪, 𝙩𝙤𝙤."
Clyde and Cole are what you'd call a Shakespearian love story. Oh don't worry, they get their happy ever after... Just after a lot of difficulties.... Because it's life. Clyde and Cole weren't charecters but people. 𝗧𝗵𝗲𝘆 𝘄𝗲𝗿𝗲 𝗿𝗲𝗽𝗿𝗲𝘀𝗲𝗻𝘁𝗮𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻 𝗼𝗳 𝘁𝘄𝗼 𝗺𝗲𝗻 𝗶𝗻 𝗹𝗼𝘃𝗲. 𝗥𝗲𝗮𝗹𝗹𝘆 𝗴𝗼𝗻𝗲 𝗳𝗼𝗿 𝗲𝗮𝗰𝗵 𝗼𝘁𝗵𝗲𝗿. 𝗔𝗻𝗱 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗱𝗶𝗳𝗳𝗶𝗰𝘂𝗹𝘁𝗶𝗲𝘀 𝘁𝗵𝗲𝘆 𝗵𝗮𝗱 𝘁𝗼 𝗳𝗮𝗰𝗲 𝗱𝘂𝗿𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝘁𝗵𝗲𝗶𝗿 𝗹𝗶𝗳𝗲𝘁𝗶𝗺𝗲.
The writing style is different and the story is their memories of each other and their life together...it a telling of all these scenes of their life.
𝙉𝙪𝙣𝙘 𝙨𝙘𝙞𝙤 𝙦𝙪𝙞𝙩 𝙨𝙞𝙩 𝙖𝙢𝙤𝙧. 𝙉𝙤𝙬 𝙄 𝙠𝙣𝙤𝙬 𝙬𝙝𝙖𝙩 𝙡𝙤𝙫𝙚 𝙞𝙨, 𝙖𝙣𝙙 𝙞𝙩'𝙨 𝙖𝙡𝙡 𝙗𝙚𝙘𝙖𝙪𝙨𝙚 𝙤𝙛 𝙮𝙤𝙪, 𝙗𝙖𝙗𝙚.
𝙐𝙣𝙖 𝙞𝙣 𝙥𝙚𝙧𝙥𝙚𝙩𝙪𝙪𝙢. 𝙏𝙤𝙜𝙚𝙩𝙝𝙚𝙧 𝙛𝙤𝙧𝙚𝙫𝙚𝙧, 𝙖𝙣𝙙 𝙩𝙝𝙖𝙩'𝙨 𝙖 𝙥𝙧𝙤𝙢𝙞𝙨𝙚, 𝙨𝙬𝙚𝙚𝙩𝙝𝙚𝙖𝙧𝙩.
Two strangers with a past that neither knows nothing about, meet and fall in love in their work. Getting over wt they fear and then committing to each other just for it to be taken away. Finding themselves back to each other because that's how they loved each other. ❤️
(𝚗𝚎𝚡𝚝 𝚝𝚑𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚔𝚗𝚠 𝙸'𝚕𝚕 𝚋𝚎 𝚠𝚛𝚒𝚝𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚜𝚘𝚗𝚗𝚎𝚝𝚜 😑)
It was an emotional roller-coaster. And I loved it. Just sad that it ended but they deserved the ending. 𝘐 𝘩𝘰𝘱𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘺 𝘨𝘦𝘵 𝘧𝘰𝘳𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘳 𝘵𝘰𝘨𝘦𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘳.
"𝙁𝙤𝙧𝙚𝙫𝙚𝙧 𝙬𝙞𝙩𝙝 𝙮𝙤𝙪 𝙞𝙨 𝙩𝙤𝙤 𝙨𝙝𝙤𝙧𝙩, 𝙢𝙪𝙘𝙝 𝙡𝙚𝙨𝙨 𝙖 𝙢𝙚𝙖𝙨𝙡𝙮 𝙝𝙪𝙣𝙙𝙧𝙚𝙙 𝙮𝙚𝙖𝙧𝙨."
It took me a while to gather my composure back to write this review because I was an emotional mess after reading this book. This author really knows how to tug at ur heartstrings. I initially started this book thinking it was a military or law enforcement genre but it wasn't. I mean it was, it has two main characters who work in law enforcement (in a global level) but it wasn't about that. 𝗧𝗵𝗶𝘀 𝘄𝗮𝘀 𝗮 𝗽𝘂𝗿𝗲𝗹𝘆 𝗿𝗼𝗺𝗮𝗻𝘁𝗶𝗰, 𝗲𝗺𝗼𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻𝗮𝗹 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝗵𝗲𝗮𝗿𝘁 𝘁𝗼𝘂𝗰𝗵𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝘀𝘁𝗼𝗿𝘆 𝗼𝗳 𝗵𝗼𝘄 𝘁𝘄𝗼 𝗺𝗲𝗻 𝗺𝗲𝘁 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝗳𝗲𝗹𝗹 𝗶𝗻 𝗹𝗼𝘃𝗲 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝗳𝗲𝗹𝗹 𝗶𝗻 𝗹𝗼𝘃𝗲 𝗮𝗹𝗹 𝗼𝘃𝗲𝗿 𝗮𝗴𝗮𝗶𝗻 𝘁𝗵𝗿𝗼𝘂𝗴𝗵 𝘁𝗵𝗲𝗶𝗿 𝗺𝗲𝗺𝗼𝗿𝗶𝗲𝘀.
"𝙏𝙝𝙖𝙣𝙠 𝙮𝙤𝙪 𝙛𝙤𝙧 𝙜𝙞𝙫𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙢𝙚 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙘𝙝𝙖𝙣𝙘𝙚 𝙩𝙤 𝙡𝙤𝙫𝙚 𝙮𝙤𝙪. 𝘼𝙣𝙙 𝙛𝙤𝙧 ���𝙞𝙫𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙮𝙤𝙪𝙧𝙨𝙚𝙡𝙛 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙘𝙝𝙖𝙣𝙘𝙚 𝙩𝙤 𝙡𝙤𝙫𝙚 𝙮𝙤𝙪, 𝙩𝙤𝙤."
Clyde and Cole are what you'd call a Shakespearian love story. Oh don't worry, they get their happy ever after... Just after a lot of difficulties.... Because it's life. Clyde and Cole weren't charecters but people. 𝗧𝗵𝗲𝘆 𝘄𝗲𝗿𝗲 𝗿𝗲𝗽𝗿𝗲𝘀𝗲𝗻𝘁𝗮𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻 𝗼𝗳 𝘁𝘄𝗼 𝗺𝗲𝗻 𝗶𝗻 𝗹𝗼𝘃𝗲. 𝗥𝗲𝗮𝗹𝗹𝘆 𝗴𝗼𝗻𝗲 𝗳𝗼𝗿 𝗲𝗮𝗰𝗵 𝗼𝘁𝗵𝗲𝗿. 𝗔𝗻𝗱 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗱𝗶𝗳𝗳𝗶𝗰𝘂𝗹𝘁𝗶𝗲𝘀 𝘁𝗵𝗲𝘆 𝗵𝗮𝗱 𝘁𝗼 𝗳𝗮𝗰𝗲 𝗱𝘂𝗿𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝘁𝗵𝗲𝗶𝗿 𝗹𝗶𝗳𝗲𝘁𝗶𝗺𝗲.
The writing style is different and the story is their memories of each other and their life together...it a telling of all these scenes of their life.
𝙉𝙪𝙣𝙘 𝙨𝙘𝙞𝙤 𝙦𝙪𝙞𝙩 𝙨𝙞𝙩 𝙖𝙢𝙤𝙧. 𝙉𝙤𝙬 𝙄 𝙠𝙣𝙤𝙬 𝙬𝙝𝙖𝙩 𝙡𝙤𝙫𝙚 𝙞𝙨, 𝙖𝙣𝙙 𝙞𝙩'𝙨 𝙖𝙡𝙡 𝙗𝙚𝙘𝙖𝙪𝙨𝙚 𝙤𝙛 𝙮𝙤𝙪, 𝙗𝙖𝙗𝙚.
𝙐𝙣𝙖 𝙞𝙣 𝙥𝙚𝙧𝙥𝙚𝙩𝙪𝙪𝙢. 𝙏𝙤𝙜𝙚𝙩𝙝𝙚𝙧 𝙛𝙤𝙧𝙚𝙫𝙚𝙧, 𝙖𝙣𝙙 𝙩𝙝𝙖𝙩'𝙨 𝙖 𝙥𝙧𝙤𝙢𝙞𝙨𝙚, 𝙨𝙬𝙚𝙚𝙩𝙝𝙚𝙖𝙧𝙩.
Two strangers with a past that neither knows nothing about, meet and fall in love in their work. Getting over wt they fear and then committing to each other just for it to be taken away. Finding themselves back to each other because that's how they loved each other. ❤️
(𝚗𝚎𝚡𝚝 𝚝𝚑𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚔𝚗𝚠 𝙸'𝚕𝚕 𝚋𝚎 𝚠𝚛𝚒𝚝𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚜𝚘𝚗𝚗𝚎𝚝𝚜 😑)
It was an emotional roller-coaster. And I loved it. Just sad that it ended but they deserved the ending. 𝘐 𝘩𝘰𝘱𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘺 𝘨𝘦𝘵 𝘧𝘰𝘳𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘳 𝘵𝘰𝘨𝘦𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘳.
"𝙁𝙤𝙧𝙚𝙫𝙚𝙧 𝙬𝙞𝙩𝙝 𝙮𝙤𝙪 𝙞𝙨 𝙩𝙤𝙤 𝙨𝙝𝙤𝙧𝙩, 𝙢𝙪𝙘𝙝 𝙡𝙚𝙨𝙨 𝙖 𝙢𝙚𝙖𝙨𝙡𝙮 𝙝𝙪𝙣𝙙𝙧𝙚𝙙 𝙮𝙚𝙖𝙧𝙨."
August 28, 2017
This was truly a heartbreaking read. It will tear you apart and put you back together again that is for sure.
Phelan and Clyde are two truly amazing men but both for different reasons.
Phelan is incredible because from the time he was a small boy he has taken what his father has said to heart and truly wanted to make the world a safer place. That being said he did exactly that when he joined the military and then on to a secret organization that deals with terrorists. He fought with himself over the fact that he was bisexual for the longest time and finally after years of worrying about it came to all those that he loved and was accepted for who he is not who he loves.
But Phelan kept it from his assets while he was a handler to Clyde for a very long time. One reason being he was extremely attracted to him from the moment he met him. Another being is because Clyde himself was homophobic.
Clyde cannot help to be homophobic because of his up bringing but also because he knows deep down he is gay also. So that makes things really hard for him. When he finds out about Phelan it changes things for both of these men drastically.
Eventually they become lovers on top of being best friends and later on husband me. But what happens when one wakes up and can no longer remember the other? Can they find their way back to one another or is all their happiness hey once shared suddenly all gone never to be remembered again.
This was an emotional read that will have you in tears in many different areas of the book. It is one of those books that you cannot put the book down because you just have to know what is going to happen next. Truly an amazing read.
Was given this galley copy for free for an open and honest review
Phelan and Clyde are two truly amazing men but both for different reasons.
Phelan is incredible because from the time he was a small boy he has taken what his father has said to heart and truly wanted to make the world a safer place. That being said he did exactly that when he joined the military and then on to a secret organization that deals with terrorists. He fought with himself over the fact that he was bisexual for the longest time and finally after years of worrying about it came to all those that he loved and was accepted for who he is not who he loves.
But Phelan kept it from his assets while he was a handler to Clyde for a very long time. One reason being he was extremely attracted to him from the moment he met him. Another being is because Clyde himself was homophobic.
Clyde cannot help to be homophobic because of his up bringing but also because he knows deep down he is gay also. So that makes things really hard for him. When he finds out about Phelan it changes things for both of these men drastically.
Eventually they become lovers on top of being best friends and later on husband me. But what happens when one wakes up and can no longer remember the other? Can they find their way back to one another or is all their happiness hey once shared suddenly all gone never to be remembered again.
This was an emotional read that will have you in tears in many different areas of the book. It is one of those books that you cannot put the book down because you just have to know what is going to happen next. Truly an amazing read.
Was given this galley copy for free for an open and honest review
November 2, 2017
Memento Amare is about two secret agents, Phelan and Clyde, who fall in love on the job when they are mentor/mentee. In two separate missions they are each exposed to some sort of interrogation weapon, which leaves Clyde with specific memory loss. Specifically, he can’t remember Phelan at all: not meeting him, not being mentor/mentee, and especially not being married to him for many years. Bummer.
At first the story seemed to be about Phelan and how he loses everything important to him, but the end gave us a premise which was more about Clyde and how he finds love for Phelan over and over, despite his irreconcilable self.
The story takes place in an alternate universe similar to our own, but with a super-secret terrorist force that actually kills bad guys, and has a whole bunch of made-up geography. It’s a little bit like the A-Team, with some touchy-feely and handsy characters in it. Phelan is made out to be this Captain America-style hero, who loses pretty much all the people he cares about, so when Clyde loses all memory of him and pushes him away, Phelan goes off the deep end. Clyde is the B.A. Baracus of the bunch, in that he has a pretty bad attitude from growing up rough, a bajillion chips on his shoulder, and has toxic masculinity issues up the wazoo. Mr Perfect and Mr Troublemaker. It’s a match made in heaven.
The tropes are fantastic, but I’ll be entirely honest—the way the story was told completely threw me off. We start out in Phelan’s head, in the past tense, when he’s a kid. We watch him grow up. Then we fast forward to Phelan devastated that Clyde just sent him a ‘I don’t remember you, so I’m leaving’ memo, and then we go back to when they first met. We do this back and forth thing for a while—the rest in present tense—so I wasn’t sure when the story actually started. Not only that, but we don’t move beyond that first moment when Phelan gets Clyde’s letter, until the last half of the story.
When I found out Clyde was the victim of some sort of memory wipe from a specific device (because I usually forget the blurb), I was curious if the storytelling style would eventually tie into that moment so when we ended the book, we’d be at the point where they’ve fixed the device and Clyde’s cured…but that’s not what happened. Not only that, but there was a prolonged HEA, to the point where I think we see them die as old men? I can’t remember. It was all really confusing.
Bottom line? Interesting idea but the execution wasn’t my favorite.
Reviewed by Ben for The Novel Approach
At first the story seemed to be about Phelan and how he loses everything important to him, but the end gave us a premise which was more about Clyde and how he finds love for Phelan over and over, despite his irreconcilable self.
The story takes place in an alternate universe similar to our own, but with a super-secret terrorist force that actually kills bad guys, and has a whole bunch of made-up geography. It’s a little bit like the A-Team, with some touchy-feely and handsy characters in it. Phelan is made out to be this Captain America-style hero, who loses pretty much all the people he cares about, so when Clyde loses all memory of him and pushes him away, Phelan goes off the deep end. Clyde is the B.A. Baracus of the bunch, in that he has a pretty bad attitude from growing up rough, a bajillion chips on his shoulder, and has toxic masculinity issues up the wazoo. Mr Perfect and Mr Troublemaker. It’s a match made in heaven.
The tropes are fantastic, but I’ll be entirely honest—the way the story was told completely threw me off. We start out in Phelan’s head, in the past tense, when he’s a kid. We watch him grow up. Then we fast forward to Phelan devastated that Clyde just sent him a ‘I don’t remember you, so I’m leaving’ memo, and then we go back to when they first met. We do this back and forth thing for a while—the rest in present tense—so I wasn’t sure when the story actually started. Not only that, but we don’t move beyond that first moment when Phelan gets Clyde’s letter, until the last half of the story.
When I found out Clyde was the victim of some sort of memory wipe from a specific device (because I usually forget the blurb), I was curious if the storytelling style would eventually tie into that moment so when we ended the book, we’d be at the point where they’ve fixed the device and Clyde’s cured…but that’s not what happened. Not only that, but there was a prolonged HEA, to the point where I think we see them die as old men? I can’t remember. It was all really confusing.
Bottom line? Interesting idea but the execution wasn’t my favorite.
Reviewed by Ben for The Novel Approach
November 21, 2017
*3,5 STARS
It’s a fact that I am a sucker for memory loss stories. There’s just something about them that really gets to me.
This story in particular felt very genuine. Cole and Clyde’s relationship felt genuine, and because of that, the heartache caused by the incident felt very real.
I didn’t mind the constant back and forth of the story telling, from past to present and back again. However, I do believe is that it was too long. Because the same facts were told more than once, often from Cole’s pov and later from Clyde’s or vice versa, it was very repetitive. Also, there were parts that could have been edited out. It was a shame, because there were parts I skim-read, and it took a bit from the atmosphere.
In any case, I did like this one and will be checking out other works by this author in the future.
It’s a fact that I am a sucker for memory loss stories. There’s just something about them that really gets to me.
This story in particular felt very genuine. Cole and Clyde’s relationship felt genuine, and because of that, the heartache caused by the incident felt very real.
I didn’t mind the constant back and forth of the story telling, from past to present and back again. However, I do believe is that it was too long. Because the same facts were told more than once, often from Cole’s pov and later from Clyde’s or vice versa, it was very repetitive. Also, there were parts that could have been edited out. It was a shame, because there were parts I skim-read, and it took a bit from the atmosphere.
In any case, I did like this one and will be checking out other works by this author in the future.
September 22, 2017
5 MILLION STARS!!!
This book was a SPARKLING GEM! Why, oh, why I haven't heard of this before?!
It's a brilliant story about LOVE, HEARTACHES, ACCEPTANCE, FEARS, HARDSHIPS & UTTER DEVOTION!
Cole & Clyde were perfect & imperfect in so many ways!
Their story was REAL & ALMOST TANGIBLE that you can feel all the emotions from the book coursing through you.
This was such a phenomenal read that deserves to be read by everyone! It was so POWERFUL that I was reduced to a quivering mess for a lot of times! In short, I've fallen in love with this book & I'm sure that Cole & Clyde would stay with me for a long time. 💗💗💗
August 21, 2017
Memento Amare is the epic love story of Phelan Cole and Clyde Barnett.
Phelan Cole ex-Army ranger, he and his best friend Nate Fabry, also ex-Army ranger, join the Global Anti Terrorist Force. Nate becomes the director and Phelan his right hand man. By all accounts they are the two most dangerous men on the planet.
Phelan, a beloved son in a strong loving family is bi-sexual, and out to those that matter. After many years at the Agency he is assigned Clyde Barnett as his partner. Phelan the senior partner, at level 9 is the handler, and Clyde, a level 3 agent the asset. For Phelan its love at first sight. The two men are a formidable force against terrorism and an enduring friendship is born.
Clyde, an abused child to an homophobic father, a lonely lost boy, he grows into angry homophobic man with amazingly deadly skills that make him perfect to the GATF. His one heterosexual relationship crashed and burned despite all effort to make it work. He is deeply, deeply closeted, and it takes 2 years and an accidental outing of Phelan's dating life, for him to realise that Phelan is bi-sexual. It's a massive rude awakening for Clyde, as his entire life has held harsh stereotypes of gay men being weak, effeminate and whimsy. All things Phelan Cole is not. If his hero Phelan Cole, the most amazing, dangerously deadly, noble man on the planet can be intimate with a man, what can that mean for Clyde?
This new discovery opens a pathway for Clyde to critically examine his own sexuality, as well as his feelings for Phelan Cole, his work partner, his best friend and the man he has fallen in love with. Finally Clyde admits to Phelan that he is gay and the two men start their wonderful romantic journey together. It's not all rainbows and unicorns, but they're madly in love and loving each other hard. Later, for safety reasons the men marry in secret, keeping their relationship private from all but Nate and Phelan's family. It's a formula that works for them.
The two men remain extremely effective work partners and later, on a mission going well, Clyde accidentally trips a door wired with unknown technology that doesn't physically injure him. Instead a blue laser beam is triggered and shines into his eye and enters his brain. He doesn't show any signs of injury but days later the encounter renders him with block amnesia that wipes all memory of Phelan from his brain. It's a devastating destruction of their life together.
This book was a wonderful love story that survived homophobic preconceived notions, violent missions, terrorists trying to kill them, torture, murder and mayhem, and that damn pesky laser box that wiped precious years from Clyde annihilating his precious strong, loving relationship with Phelan resulting in the breaking of Phelan's heart. It almost destroys them both.
Told 3rd POV, mostly in Phelan's perspective, some elements from Clyde and they're poignant chapters, Phelan recounts his and Clyde's life together told over 33 years.
It's a fabulous epic tale of friendship, acceptance, love and devotion and forgiveness. Phelan Cole was sublime, strong, compassionate, understanding and devoted, he kicked ass and romanced the hell out of the man of his dreams.
Clyde, so angry, so confused, once he woke up to who he was and who he loved, he was undeniably devoted to Phelan and it took technology that no-one knew or understood to render him lost and completely void of his undying love of Phelan. The fall out from that alone was heartbreaking reading.
So many brilliant secondary characters, like Nate Fabry the most dangerous man on the planet, he'll level anyone who hurts Phelan. Then there is Pa and Ma Cole, two selfless loving parents who not only love and accept Phelan but Clyde as well, they open Clyde's eyes to what real family is all about.
Add in the devoted friends at work who remain Phelan, Clyde and Nate's friends for decades, they're supportive, protective and good people. Set to a Agency/ semi military plot, GATF is another alphabet Agency fighting the good fight against baddies. It made for brilliant reading. Fast paced, very well fleshed out characters, excellent plot, especially Phelan, Clyde, Nate, Pa and Ma Cole, they're aging development in the book really just highlighted how delicious this novel really was.
The story was such a wondrous read I am so, so happy to have read it. I thoroughly enjoyed it. It's a shame I couldn't rate it higher it truly deserved more than 5 stars.
Phelan Cole ex-Army ranger, he and his best friend Nate Fabry, also ex-Army ranger, join the Global Anti Terrorist Force. Nate becomes the director and Phelan his right hand man. By all accounts they are the two most dangerous men on the planet.
Phelan, a beloved son in a strong loving family is bi-sexual, and out to those that matter. After many years at the Agency he is assigned Clyde Barnett as his partner. Phelan the senior partner, at level 9 is the handler, and Clyde, a level 3 agent the asset. For Phelan its love at first sight. The two men are a formidable force against terrorism and an enduring friendship is born.
Clyde, an abused child to an homophobic father, a lonely lost boy, he grows into angry homophobic man with amazingly deadly skills that make him perfect to the GATF. His one heterosexual relationship crashed and burned despite all effort to make it work. He is deeply, deeply closeted, and it takes 2 years and an accidental outing of Phelan's dating life, for him to realise that Phelan is bi-sexual. It's a massive rude awakening for Clyde, as his entire life has held harsh stereotypes of gay men being weak, effeminate and whimsy. All things Phelan Cole is not. If his hero Phelan Cole, the most amazing, dangerously deadly, noble man on the planet can be intimate with a man, what can that mean for Clyde?
This new discovery opens a pathway for Clyde to critically examine his own sexuality, as well as his feelings for Phelan Cole, his work partner, his best friend and the man he has fallen in love with. Finally Clyde admits to Phelan that he is gay and the two men start their wonderful romantic journey together. It's not all rainbows and unicorns, but they're madly in love and loving each other hard. Later, for safety reasons the men marry in secret, keeping their relationship private from all but Nate and Phelan's family. It's a formula that works for them.
The two men remain extremely effective work partners and later, on a mission going well, Clyde accidentally trips a door wired with unknown technology that doesn't physically injure him. Instead a blue laser beam is triggered and shines into his eye and enters his brain. He doesn't show any signs of injury but days later the encounter renders him with block amnesia that wipes all memory of Phelan from his brain. It's a devastating destruction of their life together.
This book was a wonderful love story that survived homophobic preconceived notions, violent missions, terrorists trying to kill them, torture, murder and mayhem, and that damn pesky laser box that wiped precious years from Clyde annihilating his precious strong, loving relationship with Phelan resulting in the breaking of Phelan's heart. It almost destroys them both.
Told 3rd POV, mostly in Phelan's perspective, some elements from Clyde and they're poignant chapters, Phelan recounts his and Clyde's life together told over 33 years.
It's a fabulous epic tale of friendship, acceptance, love and devotion and forgiveness. Phelan Cole was sublime, strong, compassionate, understanding and devoted, he kicked ass and romanced the hell out of the man of his dreams.
Clyde, so angry, so confused, once he woke up to who he was and who he loved, he was undeniably devoted to Phelan and it took technology that no-one knew or understood to render him lost and completely void of his undying love of Phelan. The fall out from that alone was heartbreaking reading.
So many brilliant secondary characters, like Nate Fabry the most dangerous man on the planet, he'll level anyone who hurts Phelan. Then there is Pa and Ma Cole, two selfless loving parents who not only love and accept Phelan but Clyde as well, they open Clyde's eyes to what real family is all about.
Add in the devoted friends at work who remain Phelan, Clyde and Nate's friends for decades, they're supportive, protective and good people. Set to a Agency/ semi military plot, GATF is another alphabet Agency fighting the good fight against baddies. It made for brilliant reading. Fast paced, very well fleshed out characters, excellent plot, especially Phelan, Clyde, Nate, Pa and Ma Cole, they're aging development in the book really just highlighted how delicious this novel really was.
The story was such a wondrous read I am so, so happy to have read it. I thoroughly enjoyed it. It's a shame I couldn't rate it higher it truly deserved more than 5 stars.
August 22, 2018
Unbridled torrent of angst.
You know one of those books that you saw in other people's lists. How they commented about how terribly sad they were, how heart-wrenching and depressing? How they just felt like a series of painful scenes from one thing to another? Some even called them--what did they call, say, torture-porn?
Then, this would be me, sitting there, narrowing eyes, being skeptical about it because most people just didn't know what angst should actually look like?
I'm glad I gave that self a good smack on the head and started reading this book because MAN, WAS THAT A GOOD ANGST WITH HEA TO SOOTHE MY ACHING SOUL.
Phelan and Clyde, partners in work, partners in life, had been married for two years when a seemingly innocent and not-dangerous event happened in their latest mission : Clyde retrieved a box from the mission, the box shot a beam of white light at him, and before he knew it, it completely erased his memories of Phelan and their connection with each other for almost eight years. It's gut-wrenching because this reverted him back to the time when he was a homophobic dickwad.
Amnesia trope is so overused but when it works out, I REALLY DOES. Example: this freaking book.
1.) Characters
I LOVE THE CHARACTERS IN THIS BOOK, EVEN THE SIDE CHARACTERS. I think Phelan and Clyde are solid characters with actual character development and depth. They're balanced in their affection and scariness level (haha). But, it's not a secret that most of what makes a book a good book is the side characters. Most obvious would be my love for Nate :( Then the other friends of Clyde who are so WHOLESOME. I just love them all. I love that Clyde is so messed up but he's surrounded by good people. He deserves it.
2.) Writing Style
Good God I love the writing style. Okay maybe it's too sappy for my taste, but I understand because Phelan is supposed to be a corndog. But the words flow nicely and the scenes look downright atmospheric at times, especially in the heartbreaking scenes. It works so well for me. The writing reminds me a bit of Life After Joe and Call Me by Your Name but not that much, which I love.
3.) Plot
The plot is nice and all but I DON'T UNDERSTAND THE POINT OF IT NOT BEING IN CHRONOLOGICAL ORDER. I mean, I don't mind jumping scenes, I like jumping events, but at times when I'm enjoying tearing my heart out, I'm disappointed to see that the next chapter turned out to be set a few months later when they've worked it out and HAPPY. It kind of ruins it for me. I want to see how they work for it, but hey, it's just me lol
Last would be : I APPRECIATE THE HELL OF THE AUTHOR FOR THAT TRIGGER WARNINGS IN THE FRONT OF THE BOOK. I mean I know exactly what I'm getting into when I picked up this book, but I appreciate the information. I did cry a bit in some parts, and got angry at Clyde at some others, but I love the correct amount of angst and wholesomeness to keep this book going.
I'd say give it a shot.
You know one of those books that you saw in other people's lists. How they commented about how terribly sad they were, how heart-wrenching and depressing? How they just felt like a series of painful scenes from one thing to another? Some even called them--what did they call, say, torture-porn?
Then, this would be me, sitting there, narrowing eyes, being skeptical about it because most people just didn't know what angst should actually look like?
I'm glad I gave that self a good smack on the head and started reading this book because MAN, WAS THAT A GOOD ANGST WITH HEA TO SOOTHE MY ACHING SOUL.
Phelan and Clyde, partners in work, partners in life, had been married for two years when a seemingly innocent and not-dangerous event happened in their latest mission : Clyde retrieved a box from the mission, the box shot a beam of white light at him, and before he knew it, it completely erased his memories of Phelan and their connection with each other for almost eight years. It's gut-wrenching because this reverted him back to the time when he was a homophobic dickwad.
Amnesia trope is so overused but when it works out, I REALLY DOES. Example: this freaking book.
1.) Characters
I LOVE THE CHARACTERS IN THIS BOOK, EVEN THE SIDE CHARACTERS. I think Phelan and Clyde are solid characters with actual character development and depth. They're balanced in their affection and scariness level (haha). But, it's not a secret that most of what makes a book a good book is the side characters. Most obvious would be my love for Nate :( Then the other friends of Clyde who are so WHOLESOME. I just love them all. I love that Clyde is so messed up but he's surrounded by good people. He deserves it.
2.) Writing Style
Good God I love the writing style. Okay maybe it's too sappy for my taste, but I understand because Phelan is supposed to be a corndog. But the words flow nicely and the scenes look downright atmospheric at times, especially in the heartbreaking scenes. It works so well for me. The writing reminds me a bit of Life After Joe and Call Me by Your Name but not that much, which I love.
3.) Plot
The plot is nice and all but I DON'T UNDERSTAND THE POINT OF IT NOT BEING IN CHRONOLOGICAL ORDER. I mean, I don't mind jumping scenes, I like jumping events, but at times when I'm enjoying tearing my heart out, I'm disappointed to see that the next chapter turned out to be set a few months later when they've worked it out and HAPPY. It kind of ruins it for me. I want to see how they work for it, but hey, it's just me lol
Last would be : I APPRECIATE THE HELL OF THE AUTHOR FOR THAT TRIGGER WARNINGS IN THE FRONT OF THE BOOK. I mean I know exactly what I'm getting into when I picked up this book, but I appreciate the information. I did cry a bit in some parts, and got angry at Clyde at some others, but I love the correct amount of angst and wholesomeness to keep this book going.
I'd say give it a shot.
September 22, 2017
A perfectly constructed epic love story. Phelan and Clyde are written so well. They give hope to us all that love, a really good strong meant to be type love, really can conquer all. Even though, as you can see in my progress updates, Clyde really pissed me off in the middle of the story there was nothing I didn't absolutely love about this book. The way it was written through flashbacks interspersed throughout really made the story come together and in my opinion, really made an impact on me as a reader. It was important to see and to know what had happened and how while also knowing what was happening and how. That may not make sense, but read this book and you'll get what I mean.
I haven't read something so beautiful in a very long time. The love depicted between the MC's as well as Phelan's parents made be believe that there really is a thing called a soulmate, and gives hope that one day every one of us will find ours. The heart-breaking moments in this story were just that. Heart-breaking. And I found myself going from being a bit misty to full on sobbing with just the reading of a few simple sentences. What Phelan felt and went through with(and without) Clyde mid-book tore my heart into tiny little pieces only to have it sewn up and put back together again.
This book was so well-crafted and thought out that it has earned a spot on my Favorites shelf and will be a re-read several times I'm sure.
I can't recommend this enough. It is long, so it is a commitment. But, oh what a pay off! I will ship Phelan and Clyde for a long time to come.
Thank you, G.D. Cox for a beautiful, faith restoring, epic love story between two people who found each other, lost their way, found themselves again and lived their HEA in a most romantic way.
I finished this one a few days ago and I still find myself thinking back on it. It brings a smile to my face every time.
I haven't read something so beautiful in a very long time. The love depicted between the MC's as well as Phelan's parents made be believe that there really is a thing called a soulmate, and gives hope that one day every one of us will find ours. The heart-breaking moments in this story were just that. Heart-breaking. And I found myself going from being a bit misty to full on sobbing with just the reading of a few simple sentences. What Phelan felt and went through with(and without) Clyde mid-book tore my heart into tiny little pieces only to have it sewn up and put back together again.
This book was so well-crafted and thought out that it has earned a spot on my Favorites shelf and will be a re-read several times I'm sure.
I can't recommend this enough. It is long, so it is a commitment. But, oh what a pay off! I will ship Phelan and Clyde for a long time to come.
Thank you, G.D. Cox for a beautiful, faith restoring, epic love story between two people who found each other, lost their way, found themselves again and lived their HEA in a most romantic way.
I finished this one a few days ago and I still find myself thinking back on it. It brings a smile to my face every time.
April 29, 2018
Agent Phelan Cole is a member of the Global Antiterrorist Force. He had gone to West Point and then became a Ranger. He and the now director, Nathan Fabry, were in the military together and he recruited Phelan. Phelan, very good at his job, always works alone until he meets Clyde Barnett. As good as Phelan's personal life had been, Clyde's was not. His father was abusive and, when his parents died, at a young age, Clyde took care of himself. Working in a circus, he developed efficiency with weapons of all sorts, leading to his recruitment.
Phelan and Clyde developed a warm loving relationship and married in secret. They were happy together until a mission in Croenia goes wrong. Clyde loses all memories of Phelan and reverts back to the homophobia of his past. He cannot accept that he is married to Cole and it soon becomes obvious that Phelan will be a fight against time to save his marriage and Clyde. He may even be in danger of losing his own life.
This was an incredibly epic tale that spanned a lifetime. We learn a lot about these two men and what makes them tick. Their love was incredible and very strong. The beam that took his memory caused a type of domino effect with problems after problems occurring, each one worse than the one before. Exciting and filled with action, Momento Amare will have you on the edge of your seat. My only complaint was that at times, it was confusing when it went back and forth between the past and present. It in no way affected my enjoyment of the incredible story of aloe to die for.
Phelan and Clyde developed a warm loving relationship and married in secret. They were happy together until a mission in Croenia goes wrong. Clyde loses all memories of Phelan and reverts back to the homophobia of his past. He cannot accept that he is married to Cole and it soon becomes obvious that Phelan will be a fight against time to save his marriage and Clyde. He may even be in danger of losing his own life.
This was an incredibly epic tale that spanned a lifetime. We learn a lot about these two men and what makes them tick. Their love was incredible and very strong. The beam that took his memory caused a type of domino effect with problems after problems occurring, each one worse than the one before. Exciting and filled with action, Momento Amare will have you on the edge of your seat. My only complaint was that at times, it was confusing when it went back and forth between the past and present. It in no way affected my enjoyment of the incredible story of aloe to die for.
December 1, 2020
I think the author really tried to make something unique, but it just didn't go very well. The style of writing just didn't bring me, as the reader, any first hand experiences. The story was done in random snippets of time and it was written in such a weird writing style that it just didn't bring the story alive. It didn't make me feel how the main characters felt, it didn't make me appreciate their story at all. That was a huge disappointment. If the author would like to learn about writing something or if anyone would like to read a MM story about amnesia that really makes you FEEL - read Please Remember Me.
September 2, 2017
So good....LOVE found, lost, and found again for eternity...soul mates
I finished this book in tears. Enough said. Though I was skeptical at first of the style and format in which the story was written, I can definitely say the journey was well worth it. A love story that will hit the reader directly in the feels.
I finished this book in tears. Enough said. Though I was skeptical at first of the style and format in which the story was written, I can definitely say the journey was well worth it. A love story that will hit the reader directly in the feels.
September 22, 2017
This is pretty amazing, and I really like the author's unique writing style. There are things about this book that SHOULD be annoying - non-linear narrative, i.e, moving back and forth in the timeline, repetition of phrases, things and events, not much actual dialogue, somewhat overly long - but they ended up being the things I liked best about the book. It's an epic love story.
September 11, 2018
Reading this book was like sailing in the sea
The storm was so bad you go up and down in a second. It hurts but it's also beautiful at times.
This book filled my heart with so much feelings, It was everything we want, man it's everything I want. And the forlorn feelings I got from this book is NO JOKE.
The storm was so bad you go up and down in a second. It hurts but it's also beautiful at times.
This book filled my heart with so much feelings, It was everything we want, man it's everything I want. And the forlorn feelings I got from this book is NO JOKE.
January 11, 2019
Your heart will melt, break and melt all over again as you follow Phelan and Clyde's love story throughout the years. It's a long story told in a non-linear way and just when you think it's the end, it's not and it's a rewarding thing if you're one of those readers (like me) who wants to know what happens after the author decided to close the curtain on the story.
September 5, 2017
😍 I truly enjoyed this well written love story. Took me a minute to catch up to the style of flashbacks,and overall back and forth. I adore Phelan and Clyde. Ma and Pa were wonderfully written parents. All the various emotions I got from the story just made this a 5 star plus read for me.
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