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Be a Man
For decades women have shone the spotlight on equality and asked why they're treated like second-class citizens. They've understandably demanded freedoms, rights and legal protections and, while they've slowly won some battles, it has been far too long and been far too arduous.
But why is that? Why have generations of men blocked their march towards equality and what impact has it had? Journalist , broadcaster and former 'lad' Chris Hemmings sets out to explore why so few men ask such probing questions of their own sex.
How do we raise sweet young boys to become aggressive? Why do so few fathers take parental leave? Why do men rape so many people every year? Why do we still judge success on financial prowess? Why are three times as many men killing themselves as women? In short, how does our masculine determination to be dominant not only impact on the women and girls in our lives, but also the men and boys.
The answer to all these questions, and more, can be determined by discovering what, in 2017, it really means to Be A Man.
But why is that? Why have generations of men blocked their march towards equality and what impact has it had? Journalist , broadcaster and former 'lad' Chris Hemmings sets out to explore why so few men ask such probing questions of their own sex.
How do we raise sweet young boys to become aggressive? Why do so few fathers take parental leave? Why do men rape so many people every year? Why do we still judge success on financial prowess? Why are three times as many men killing themselves as women? In short, how does our masculine determination to be dominant not only impact on the women and girls in our lives, but also the men and boys.
The answer to all these questions, and more, can be determined by discovering what, in 2017, it really means to Be A Man.
220 pages, Kindle Edition
Published August 15, 2017
4 people are currently reading
171 people want to read
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Displaying 1 - 7 of 7 reviews
April 23, 2024
Some really great points, I’d love to see an updated version as this is quite dated now (not sure if there has been an update?).
March 28, 2019
I really wanted to like this book; I think it's a very interesting and relevant topic and I was curious to view it through the perspective of a man who is a "self-proclaimed former 'lad'". However, despite the thought provoking discussions Hemmings dives into I cannot overlook the glaring issues that are present throughout the entire read.
In my opinion, the most significant problem with Be A Man is the lack of references. Hemmings highlights some very shocking statistics, uses some excellent quotes and mentions a lot of relevant organisations but he doesn't cite any of these things. I believe that a book of this kind should most definitely have a reference list; otherwise the reliability of the evidence can very easily be called into question. Furthermore as this book claims to discuss "how to escape" macho culture a further reading/watching section would have made for a valuable addition. As well as a list of organisations to become involved with to actively escape and dismantle macho culture.
Although I found Hemmings' voice to be very distinct and often quite funny, - as well as appropriate, his writing was not too intimidating for a reader who is looking for an introduction to this topic - overall the writing throughout Be A Man struck me as lazy. Another few runs through the editing process would have made this a much more enjoyable read. There were frequent mistyped or missing words, the recurrent grammar error of "try and" as opposed to "try to", and the over-reliance on certain phrases such as "it's no wonder that". These examples are minor issues that I would have been willing to overlook had it not been for the repetition in Chapter Eight. In Chapter Two Hemmings introduces some facts and figures regarding male dominance in the work place; in Chapter Eight he repeats this entire section word for word, with the exact same punctuation. This section is over a page long! In my opinion this blatant copy and paste repetition is completely lazy and inexcusable and as such it highlights the other issues in the writing that I mentioned earlier.
Overall I'd be unlikely to recommend this book. I do think that it highlights some important issues and shares some very valuable statistics however, the lazy writing and the lack of referencing (or further reading/watching recommendations) raises some doubts surrounding the book's credibility.
In my opinion, the most significant problem with Be A Man is the lack of references. Hemmings highlights some very shocking statistics, uses some excellent quotes and mentions a lot of relevant organisations but he doesn't cite any of these things. I believe that a book of this kind should most definitely have a reference list; otherwise the reliability of the evidence can very easily be called into question. Furthermore as this book claims to discuss "how to escape" macho culture a further reading/watching section would have made for a valuable addition. As well as a list of organisations to become involved with to actively escape and dismantle macho culture.
Although I found Hemmings' voice to be very distinct and often quite funny, - as well as appropriate, his writing was not too intimidating for a reader who is looking for an introduction to this topic - overall the writing throughout Be A Man struck me as lazy. Another few runs through the editing process would have made this a much more enjoyable read. There were frequent mistyped or missing words, the recurrent grammar error of "try and" as opposed to "try to", and the over-reliance on certain phrases such as "it's no wonder that". These examples are minor issues that I would have been willing to overlook had it not been for the repetition in Chapter Eight. In Chapter Two Hemmings introduces some facts and figures regarding male dominance in the work place; in Chapter Eight he repeats this entire section word for word, with the exact same punctuation. This section is over a page long! In my opinion this blatant copy and paste repetition is completely lazy and inexcusable and as such it highlights the other issues in the writing that I mentioned earlier.
Overall I'd be unlikely to recommend this book. I do think that it highlights some important issues and shares some very valuable statistics however, the lazy writing and the lack of referencing (or further reading/watching recommendations) raises some doubts surrounding the book's credibility.
March 18, 2021
I enjoyed this book very much! I think the phrase 'toxic masculinity is vague and inconsistent with the real conversation men need to be having, and that is the pursuit of masculinity, which can sometimes be detrimental to men. I think masculinity is good, but I do think that men need to seek refuge in how they talk about their struggles. I also believe, on a larger social scale, we aren't ready to truly understand the struggles that men face in life. From poor mental health, porn addiction, suicidal thoughts, and the injustice faced in the family court cases when couples go through a divorce, this book outlines some of the pernicious ways men are struggling. Maybe the conversation is not about how 'toxic' masculinity is but should lean toward adopting a healthier and more positive masculinity framework for men.
July 22, 2018
Interesting take. We often hear that men will only listen to other men, so if you've got one of those in your life and need to get some basic feminism through his head, this might fit the bill. I say feminism because even though this is framed as "life is like this for men", it's something we've been saying forever - patriarchal gender roles actively harm men as well as women. There's not much new here, but it's good to see men actually starting to get to grips with their problems.
July 10, 2024
I highly recommend this book.
Chris Hemmings defines and explains how macho, alpha male and masculine conditioning starts in childhood. It leaves men unable to communicate effectively, and many today face problems interacting with and joining a changing society.
The negative consequences of masculinity, drinking, competition, and misogyny are explored.
This book is a useful starting point to research the problem and how we might find a solution.
Chris Hemmings defines and explains how macho, alpha male and masculine conditioning starts in childhood. It leaves men unable to communicate effectively, and many today face problems interacting with and joining a changing society.
The negative consequences of masculinity, drinking, competition, and misogyny are explored.
This book is a useful starting point to research the problem and how we might find a solution.
June 3, 2018
Starts strong. Effective and engaging when relating his own experiences with the palpable emotional connection of lived experince. Becomes more of a slog to get through when he ventures into other areas he feels he should cover, but falls back on a fact and stat. bombardment which flows less naturally from him.
January 12, 2023
Some interesting ideas covered but really poorly written so the ideas were often hard to follow. And don't get me started on the amount of typos 🙈🙃
Displaying 1 - 7 of 7 reviews