What do you think?
Rate this book
Spermjackers From Hell
Let’s summon a succubus, they said. It’ll be fun, they said… I have some friends and we had a crazy let’s summon a demon. Not just any demon but a sexy devil chick that will do anything we want—even butt stuff. It’ll be easy. It’s not like it’s going to work. Monsters aren’t real. We were wrong. Really fucking wrong. The demon is not what we thought and it’s making horrible things happen. People are cutting into each other's junk, some guy is fucking his dog, and sex slugs from Hell are raping us and stealing our semen in order to build a goddamn hive! We didn’t mean for any of this. But we’re gonna fix it... Just after a few more beers and bong hits. From Christine Morgan, author of Mythic the Minotaur, and The Raven’s Viking Stories, comes a sleazy and deviant satire about sex, occultism, and nerd culture.
247 pages, Kindle Edition
First published August 14, 2017
52 people are currently reading
532 people want to read
Ratings & Reviews
Friends & Following
Create a free account to discover what your friends think of this book!
Community Reviews
Displaying 1 - 30 of 51 reviews
May 13, 2018
One day, Jeff Burk, head editor for Deadite Press sat alone pondering what direction his cult horror press needed to go. Deadite Press had tackled zombies and vampires and giants and cryptoids and giant worms and grotesque body horror and well, everything but the kitchen sink it seemed. He sighed. Where does the premier cult horror press to the world go from here?
Thats when author and doll-mutilator, Christine Morgan strolled through the door and slapped down a slimy, teal glowing slug on his desk.
"What the fuck is that?!" Burk exclaimed.
"Its an old He-Man Battle Cat that I lopped the legs off of, repainted and added a bit of home grown special lighting effects to. But that's not the question, it's the answer."
"The answer?" Burk asked, intrigued.
"The answer to your conundrum. It's a succubus from SPERMJACKERS FROM HELL, the book I wrote and you're going to publish because there is a giant gap in succubus books from Deadite."
Jeff Burk laughed having gone mad with delight.
Christine Morgan wrung her hands, an evil gesture that could only mean one thing: she came up with a great idea to mangle another child's toy.
Meanwhile, somewhere else and quite sometime later, Frank Edler wrote this ridiculous review for said Deadite Press publication of said Christine Morgan succubus cult horror classic. He enjoyed it.
Thats when author and doll-mutilator, Christine Morgan strolled through the door and slapped down a slimy, teal glowing slug on his desk.
"What the fuck is that?!" Burk exclaimed.
"Its an old He-Man Battle Cat that I lopped the legs off of, repainted and added a bit of home grown special lighting effects to. But that's not the question, it's the answer."
"The answer?" Burk asked, intrigued.
"The answer to your conundrum. It's a succubus from SPERMJACKERS FROM HELL, the book I wrote and you're going to publish because there is a giant gap in succubus books from Deadite."
Jeff Burk laughed having gone mad with delight.
Christine Morgan wrung her hands, an evil gesture that could only mean one thing: she came up with a great idea to mangle another child's toy.
Meanwhile, somewhere else and quite sometime later, Frank Edler wrote this ridiculous review for said Deadite Press publication of said Christine Morgan succubus cult horror classic. He enjoyed it.
October 7, 2017
I have the paperback edition of Spermjackers on my desk right now, open at page 34.
The last line on that page reads:
"But it'd be sick, gratuitous, and wrong."
Few people (as long as they're not prudish or easily offended) will read that line without laughing out loud, or at the very least cracking one hell of a smile, because of the paragraphs that immediately precede it.
There are other lines which work to similar effect, but this is the one that sticks in my mind for some reason.
Spermjackers is funny - at times, hilarious - but, for all its humour, quite horrific when it reaches its sickening climax. I don't want to give away any plot spoilers; let's just say that in keeping with tradition in the horror genre, not every protagonist comes out of it well.
Features I'd like to pick out for special mention are:
(1) This book comes out fighting from the opening bell. Things happen quickly. You won't get bored waiting around for the plot to develop;
(2) The dialogue of the teeanagers at the centre of the story. I'm guessing the author has teenage kids herself, because it rings very true - at least to me;
(3) Throughout the tale, beginning at page 30, the author deconstructs the novel format. This was a high-risk strategy which could have gone horribly wrong. That it doesn't, and that it adds to the entertainment value of this fine (if deeply perverse) book is testament to Christine Morgan's writing skills;
(4) The perverse scenario that drives the plot forward is tackled with a gleeful gusto. I suppose it had to be all or nothing with this sort of concept, especially as the publisher is Deadite Press. I confess I haven't read any other books with the Deadite imprint, but I know of their reputation, and I'm guessing that this book is on a par with the most extreme they have to offer.
In a nutshell: of you want something fast-paced, deeply and perversely funny, topped off with a good measure of genuine, nasty horror, then look no further; this is your book.
February 22, 2021
This book was just ok for me. I think it jumped around a bit too much to other characters that didn’t seem to fit the storyline. Meh... just not my thing I guess.
March 8, 2021
I enjoyed the writing a little more than The Night Silver River Run Red, and hope for a sequel. It was stupid as hell.
February 3, 2022
As the title indicates, Spermjackers From Hell is an epic work of literary horror whose themes are as old as the human species itself and resonant across all of time and space, showcasing one singular, undeniable, universal truth about mankind: teenage boys are sex-crazed morons and will go to incredibly ridiculous and stupid lengths to get laid, including summoning a succubus from the depth of Hell in the hopes of getting their dicks wet.
See? Like I said, it's all literary and shit. There's enough orgies, demonic-fueled couplings, and raunch to make Mary Shelley proud, and then some. Weaved deftly between and through the erotic, "erotic," and the erotic paving way for disgust scenes because this is a horror book, goddamnit, is Christine Morgan's humor and occasional fourth-wall breaking commentary that will give you giggle fits or leave you repulsed. Or both, more than likely, particularly in case of Coach and his perhaps much too faithful canine companion.... Morgan puts herself front and center, letting her authorial voice guide readers through a series of interludes to provide insights into the town of Fairmont and "meet some of the people whose lives are about to be fucked over," all the while peppering the narrative with pop culture references and riffing on video games and movies. It's the kind of horror book fans of Kevin Smith or Ryan Reynolds' Deadpool will be able to slip into with ease. Speaking of Kevin Smith, I couldn't help but picture a young Randall from Clerks as the foul-mouthed Spencer, but that's neither here nor there maybe.
Morgan's writing is incredibly fun and infectious. The story moves fast, and thankfully doesn't finish prematurely nor pound away at you only to leave you bored and sputter along to an unsatisfying climax. If anything, it sets up a sequel beautifully (fingers crossed we get to see that one day!) and leaves you satisfied but ready for another spin. What's most intriguing, though, is the way Morgan explores and subverts succubi lore. While the Deadite Press cover art showcases a horny, naked demon chick in keeping with standard succubus expectations, Morgan's conjured creeper is far less appealing in its natural form and the cause behind its effects on Spermjackers boys is more akin to hallucinogenic frogs or the psychedelic toad venom celebrities are apparently fond of smoking nowadays.
Spermjackers From Hell is a ribald blast of erotic horror, one that's both completely, joyously over the top and oddly well grounded thanks to its recognizable and perhaps even relatable characters. It's as entertaining as it is questionable and squicky. Now, bring on Babydaddies of the Damned, Ms. Morgan!
See? Like I said, it's all literary and shit. There's enough orgies, demonic-fueled couplings, and raunch to make Mary Shelley proud, and then some. Weaved deftly between and through the erotic, "erotic," and the erotic paving way for disgust scenes because this is a horror book, goddamnit, is Christine Morgan's humor and occasional fourth-wall breaking commentary that will give you giggle fits or leave you repulsed. Or both, more than likely, particularly in case of Coach and his perhaps much too faithful canine companion.... Morgan puts herself front and center, letting her authorial voice guide readers through a series of interludes to provide insights into the town of Fairmont and "meet some of the people whose lives are about to be fucked over," all the while peppering the narrative with pop culture references and riffing on video games and movies. It's the kind of horror book fans of Kevin Smith or Ryan Reynolds' Deadpool will be able to slip into with ease. Speaking of Kevin Smith, I couldn't help but picture a young Randall from Clerks as the foul-mouthed Spencer, but that's neither here nor there maybe.
Morgan's writing is incredibly fun and infectious. The story moves fast, and thankfully doesn't finish prematurely nor pound away at you only to leave you bored and sputter along to an unsatisfying climax. If anything, it sets up a sequel beautifully (fingers crossed we get to see that one day!) and leaves you satisfied but ready for another spin. What's most intriguing, though, is the way Morgan explores and subverts succubi lore. While the Deadite Press cover art showcases a horny, naked demon chick in keeping with standard succubus expectations, Morgan's conjured creeper is far less appealing in its natural form and the cause behind its effects on Spermjackers boys is more akin to hallucinogenic frogs or the psychedelic toad venom celebrities are apparently fond of smoking nowadays.
Spermjackers From Hell is a ribald blast of erotic horror, one that's both completely, joyously over the top and oddly well grounded thanks to its recognizable and perhaps even relatable characters. It's as entertaining as it is questionable and squicky. Now, bring on Babydaddies of the Damned, Ms. Morgan!
November 4, 2024
1.0 ⭐️
Someone told me this is really quite funny. They lied.
Someone told me this is really quite funny. They lied.
September 14, 2023
What this all really boils down to is a blatant set-up for a sequel.
I’m thinking "Babydaddies of the Damned"
I’m thinking "Babydaddies of the Damned"
September 23, 2017
Gross, dude.
February 4, 2022
"Where’s your succubus, mister hot-shit wizard?"
This has to be the weirdest gift that I have ever received. My husband got me this as part of my Valentines gift. I’m kind of speechless that this is what he went with but I’m not complaining.
Not really sure what to say about this except that this was weird as f**k and hilarious. Totally worth the read. It went by really quickly because the scenarios in this book were very far fetched and absolutely side splitting.
Just keep in mind that this book is not for the everyday reader. Beware with books like this. If you like f**ked up things and nothing gets to you, then welcome to the bizarro party!
This has to be the weirdest gift that I have ever received. My husband got me this as part of my Valentines gift. I’m kind of speechless that this is what he went with but I’m not complaining.
Not really sure what to say about this except that this was weird as f**k and hilarious. Totally worth the read. It went by really quickly because the scenarios in this book were very far fetched and absolutely side splitting.
Just keep in mind that this book is not for the everyday reader. Beware with books like this. If you like f**ked up things and nothing gets to you, then welcome to the bizarro party!
May 22, 2018
I’ve learned a lesson from this book. Never think with your member. Although most of us guys have all done that in the past. But when summoning a succubus read this first consider it your learning manual.
Filled with pop culture and teenage antics Morgan whips up a can of kickass sleazy sexy satire that leaves you with more than just hairy palms.
And the science aspects of it all says “oops” and there may be more on the other side...
Filled with pop culture and teenage antics Morgan whips up a can of kickass sleazy sexy satire that leaves you with more than just hairy palms.
And the science aspects of it all says “oops” and there may be more on the other side...
June 29, 2019
Ms. Morgan’s unique style is absolutely amazing. It’s difficult to pin down, but her usages of lingo, slang, jargon, banter, language, phrasing, timing, odd vocabulary, punctuation, chapter size, pop culture, and innuendo all mix and flow effortlessly, stimulating all 5 senses at once. The end result is indisputable proof of her original, engaging, truly stunning method of storytelling.
I’ll read everything she writes until I die.
5/5 Sloppy-slick Skulls
☠️☠️☠️☠️☠️
I’ll read everything she writes until I die.
5/5 Sloppy-slick Skulls
☠️☠️☠️☠️☠️
March 5, 2019
Well now, that was something! :)
I don't know where to begin. First, there are a lot of passages in this book that are somehow chaotic and poetic at the same time. Amidst these chaotic passages, I kept thinking that the story would collapse along with the characters within it's confines. But, somehow, it never did. There is a great feeling of losing your breath and catching it again only to get punched in the stomach and have an eye poked out. There's a great emotional range and depth at work here that really caught me off guard, in addition to other surprises that the book contains. Out of all this, though, I think that my favorite aspect of this little tale is the way that the author seized upon the desperation and fervor of teenage male sexuality. I kept catching myself thinking, "oh, I remember feeling that way." I wonder how she did that. Definitely a great little chunk of weird horror fiction! :D
I don't know where to begin. First, there are a lot of passages in this book that are somehow chaotic and poetic at the same time. Amidst these chaotic passages, I kept thinking that the story would collapse along with the characters within it's confines. But, somehow, it never did. There is a great feeling of losing your breath and catching it again only to get punched in the stomach and have an eye poked out. There's a great emotional range and depth at work here that really caught me off guard, in addition to other surprises that the book contains. Out of all this, though, I think that my favorite aspect of this little tale is the way that the author seized upon the desperation and fervor of teenage male sexuality. I kept catching myself thinking, "oh, I remember feeling that way." I wonder how she did that. Definitely a great little chunk of weird horror fiction! :D
August 19, 2019
Pretty funny story. If u don’t like sick humor then this book is not for u.
February 11, 2021
Absolutely nuts, loved it!
March 5, 2021
3.5 Stars
This was picked by my small online bookclub and I'd seen it before mentioned in a few of my groups so I was looking forward to it. I liked the concept of a group teenagers summoning a sexy demon devil and it did deliver on that score, it was dark, erotic, funny & scary . The use of language and actions were spot on leading to visions in my mind I'm not quite sure I liked! ha!.
Although I read this book quickly as the action romped along I found the narrative a bit too jumpy and inclusion of certain characters didn't seem quite to fit upon reflection.
It wasn't what I expected but I'm glad I read it and I'm looking forward to see what the others think.
This was picked by my small online bookclub and I'd seen it before mentioned in a few of my groups so I was looking forward to it. I liked the concept of a group teenagers summoning a sexy demon devil and it did deliver on that score, it was dark, erotic, funny & scary . The use of language and actions were spot on leading to visions in my mind I'm not quite sure I liked! ha!.
Although I read this book quickly as the action romped along I found the narrative a bit too jumpy and inclusion of certain characters didn't seem quite to fit upon reflection.
It wasn't what I expected but I'm glad I read it and I'm looking forward to see what the others think.
August 18, 2020
I’m going to hell for laughing while I read this book.
Don’t get me wrong, Spermjackers From Hell by Christine Morgan is graphic and explicit and has acts of horrifying depravity to shock and disgust you, but it is also satirical and funny as all heck in a lot of places—and I truly feel that is due to Christine’s skillful writing style, so if I go to hell for laughing, I blame her.
I originally avoided reading this book. I was put off by both the title and cover art. Then I had a conversation with the author during KillerCon Online and decided to give it a chance. She basically described it as an homage to Weird Science but with a succubus. This is an apt description, but Spermjackers is easier to enjoy because the characters are of age instead of teens. But do be warned, the level of depravity is horrific. This is not a casual read, this is not erotica, this is not for the sensitive constitution. This is horrifying, hedonistic, and hilarious.
One of the many entertaining aspects of this book is how the author breaks into poetic repetition like this is deep and moving verse instead of a brash succubus story. Christine Morgan’s daring writing style here is the stuff of legend. So many levels of satire.
The characters in Spermjacker from Hell (I hate that title, but it is apropos) range from sympathizable to detestable. The author also intersperses brief interludes that are both gruesome and hilarious to give backstory on both the characters and the setting. This is done in true storyteller fashion, and I loved it. It works beautifully, if the word beautiful can find its place somewhere in relation to this story.
I can say so many things about this book. Most importantly, I wish I had not waited to read it. I read it in one sitting, and I am certain I will read it again in the future—I do have my own signed copy in my library, after all. This is one of the most entertaining books I have read in a long time.
And I hope I don’t go to hell for finding so much of it funny.
Don’t get me wrong, Spermjackers From Hell by Christine Morgan is graphic and explicit and has acts of horrifying depravity to shock and disgust you, but it is also satirical and funny as all heck in a lot of places—and I truly feel that is due to Christine’s skillful writing style, so if I go to hell for laughing, I blame her.
I originally avoided reading this book. I was put off by both the title and cover art. Then I had a conversation with the author during KillerCon Online and decided to give it a chance. She basically described it as an homage to Weird Science but with a succubus. This is an apt description, but Spermjackers is easier to enjoy because the characters are of age instead of teens. But do be warned, the level of depravity is horrific. This is not a casual read, this is not erotica, this is not for the sensitive constitution. This is horrifying, hedonistic, and hilarious.
One of the many entertaining aspects of this book is how the author breaks into poetic repetition like this is deep and moving verse instead of a brash succubus story. Christine Morgan’s daring writing style here is the stuff of legend. So many levels of satire.
The characters in Spermjacker from Hell (I hate that title, but it is apropos) range from sympathizable to detestable. The author also intersperses brief interludes that are both gruesome and hilarious to give backstory on both the characters and the setting. This is done in true storyteller fashion, and I loved it. It works beautifully, if the word beautiful can find its place somewhere in relation to this story.
I can say so many things about this book. Most importantly, I wish I had not waited to read it. I read it in one sitting, and I am certain I will read it again in the future—I do have my own signed copy in my library, after all. This is one of the most entertaining books I have read in a long time.
And I hope I don’t go to hell for finding so much of it funny.
March 6, 2018
giving this book two stars was just a complement...I have read Matt shaw and authors who were pretty dark and this was just trying to be dark but fell flat on it face. i love my gore and weird stuff...the author should focus more on more details then jumping off subject...i seen authors like bentley little have different chapter with other people and explaining...she has three or four characters that were off subject who basically tried to have a life of there own...i think it was just she trying too hard...but remember this is my opinion...but we got to remember the succubi just smh on that one..i can not go into that one...and how she ended the book for a sequel..just smh
This author jump off subject so much it was funny..and boy she was feminist in this book...she must hate sexy comic book hero...she found it all sexist in a bad way...i am female and i find they she was putting vampirella sexy look down and even the shape shiftier from x men down...smh...i find that she wanted to be part of the boys then write...to off subject for my taste...not worth the money she had for this book...and i never complained about how much i spent on a book either and i do this one..
This author jump off subject so much it was funny..and boy she was feminist in this book...she must hate sexy comic book hero...she found it all sexist in a bad way...i am female and i find they she was putting vampirella sexy look down and even the shape shiftier from x men down...smh...i find that she wanted to be part of the boys then write...to off subject for my taste...not worth the money she had for this book...and i never complained about how much i spent on a book either and i do this one..
June 5, 2021
Bought this book entirely based on the name/cover. Thought it would be hilarious. I was wrong. There were a couple of scenes in the book that made my stomach turn and nothing ever makes my stomach turn. Can never ever recommend this to anyone based on those scenes.
Want to read
April 1, 2022WTF IS THIS!? 😂😂😂
September 7, 2024
This book had a great concept, but the plot fell flat for me. There were parts of the book with too much commentary, which made it confusing and difficult to keep reading. I enjoyed the vignettes throughout the book, which helped keep me engaged. The ending does hint to a second book, but I believe the author could have done more with the ending.
November 17, 2024
This was okay. Just as you might think, it’s about succubi. But forget the hot steamy erotic beautiful beings that suck and slurp for your salty goodness; this is a demon monster slug that’s thirsty for your essence. Super weird and nasty!
July 15, 2024
"Retards in a horror movie, Take 2. Action."
With a title such as this, you'd expect the book to be pretty funny and absurd. Luckily, it is both of those things. The story follows a group of idiots in their late teens or early twenties, and the dialogue between them all feels very realistic. They curse a lot, make immature sex jokes, and summon a succubus because they're so horny and desperate to get laid.
Overall, a pretty fun read, but the author made one very strange decision that messes with the pacing of the book. And it seems like a deliberate decision, almost as if she was trying to fuck with the reader, as shown in this quote from the text:
"You-the-reader probably have a pretty good idea of what's going on. You may be speculating, even anxious, to see what happens next. Which means this is the perfect place for another of these obnoxious goddamn Interludes!"
The interludes themselves are not an issue, rather, it's the fact that they're often placed right before something significant is about to occur.
"That was a rotten place to leave things hanging. Don't you hate it when bastardly writers pull such manipulative tricks?"
I'll compare this to another book that I also gave three stars: Elantris by Brandon Sanderson. I know, real big name in the indie horror community, but hear me out. Brando Sando probably never expected his work to be compared to Spermjackers From Hell, but there's a first time for everything.
In Elantris, you follow three main POVs, and just when something significant was about the occur, the POV would change, leaving the reader hanging, while simultaneously causing the reader to dislike certain characters. Brandon structured the story this way due to a lack of skill and experience. Christine, however, seemed to do this with malintent. Even though, as stated previously, the interludes are not bad, I began to dislike them simply because they kept taking me out of the story that I was otherwise enjoying.
This is the first book of hers I've read, so I'm willing to give her another shot, but if this is an ongoing issue with her work, I'll have to drop her from my TBR.
With a title such as this, you'd expect the book to be pretty funny and absurd. Luckily, it is both of those things. The story follows a group of idiots in their late teens or early twenties, and the dialogue between them all feels very realistic. They curse a lot, make immature sex jokes, and summon a succubus because they're so horny and desperate to get laid.
Overall, a pretty fun read, but the author made one very strange decision that messes with the pacing of the book. And it seems like a deliberate decision, almost as if she was trying to fuck with the reader, as shown in this quote from the text:
"You-the-reader probably have a pretty good idea of what's going on. You may be speculating, even anxious, to see what happens next. Which means this is the perfect place for another of these obnoxious goddamn Interludes!"
The interludes themselves are not an issue, rather, it's the fact that they're often placed right before something significant is about to occur.
"That was a rotten place to leave things hanging. Don't you hate it when bastardly writers pull such manipulative tricks?"
I'll compare this to another book that I also gave three stars: Elantris by Brandon Sanderson. I know, real big name in the indie horror community, but hear me out. Brando Sando probably never expected his work to be compared to Spermjackers From Hell, but there's a first time for everything.
In Elantris, you follow three main POVs, and just when something significant was about the occur, the POV would change, leaving the reader hanging, while simultaneously causing the reader to dislike certain characters. Brandon structured the story this way due to a lack of skill and experience. Christine, however, seemed to do this with malintent. Even though, as stated previously, the interludes are not bad, I began to dislike them simply because they kept taking me out of the story that I was otherwise enjoying.
This is the first book of hers I've read, so I'm willing to give her another shot, but if this is an ongoing issue with her work, I'll have to drop her from my TBR.
March 11, 2022
Disclosure time: I know Christine and even edited one of her books (not this one). I also know Jim, the cover artist, and he has done a few covers for me. You may call bias on this one, and that's fine. I try to be as honest as possible in these things. It's just that I'm very lucky. I've somehow found myself surrounded by very talented people. Christine and Jim are among this crowd.
First of all, great cover! I love that it's kinda disingenuous when it comes to the succubi in this book. It's even addressed late in the book, which I loved. A group of horndogs (and their one woman friend) decide to summon a sex demon so they can finally get laid. So naturally everything goes wrong for everyone involved (and a lot of people not involved). Having been a horny young boy once upon a time, I totally got what they were trying to do. I might have tried something similar if I thought it might work, but I was younger than the boys here. They are definitely high school students, and I was in junior high at the time.
Regardless, despite this connection I felt, my favorite moments are actually the interludes, and I love how they really come together in the end. I kind of hope the suggested sequel kind of happens. I'd love to know more about Enoch.
This book is great fun, but it helps if you're a pervert like me. I mean, not specifically my kind of perversion, but . . . well, you get the idea.
First of all, great cover! I love that it's kinda disingenuous when it comes to the succubi in this book. It's even addressed late in the book, which I loved. A group of horndogs (and their one woman friend) decide to summon a sex demon so they can finally get laid. So naturally everything goes wrong for everyone involved (and a lot of people not involved). Having been a horny young boy once upon a time, I totally got what they were trying to do. I might have tried something similar if I thought it might work, but I was younger than the boys here. They are definitely high school students, and I was in junior high at the time.
Regardless, despite this connection I felt, my favorite moments are actually the interludes, and I love how they really come together in the end. I kind of hope the suggested sequel kind of happens. I'd love to know more about Enoch.
This book is great fun, but it helps if you're a pervert like me. I mean, not specifically my kind of perversion, but . . . well, you get the idea.
March 28, 2018
Hysterical. I really loved the 4th wall breaking narration. Morgan did it really well and it added a really great doss of humor to an already laugh out loud funny book. As funny as it was there was plenty of nastiness. One scene in particular turned my stomach and made me feel ill.
July 17, 2020
Extremely well written. Loved the vignettes in the book. I actually wish it was more gratuitous and a much longer read. I can handle it. Author's a real tongue in cheek writer.
Not really a book I'd recommend to many folks despite the high rating.
Not really a book I'd recommend to many folks despite the high rating.
November 1, 2020
I did not want to give this 4 stars... It was disgusting and depraved (major trigger warning for dog lovers). But it managed to disturb little old, jaded and desensitized me, so — effective? And it was kinda fun. Hope there really is a sequel. I’d be there in a heartbeat.
September 3, 2022
This was . . . well, pretty much exactly what you'd expect from a book called Spermjackers From Hell - except, of course, the horny succubus in question is absolutely nothing like what you'd expect. While Christine Morgan absolutely delivers on the premise, she does so in ways that are absurdly unexpected, which make this a far a more enjoyable read.
Before we get into the story, I have to talk about the storytelling for a moment. This is a clever, self-aware, disjointed sort of narrative that begins near the end, before rewinding back to the start, with frequent vignettes where Morgan breaks the fourth wall and talks directly to the reader. On the positive side, the style creates some artificial tension, and serves to keep you on your toes, never knowing what's coming next. On the negative side, those vignettes feel like unfulfilled promises, teasing us with unholy erotic retributions that ultimately happen off the page, only to be recapped in passing. There's almost an entire second book waiting in those vignettes.
Okay, so back to the story. This starts out with your basic horror movie premise - a gang of slackers decide to summon a succubus, and plan to do it from within the bowels of the abandoned bomb shelter in the park. It's a great scenario and a great setting, and Morgan gleefully indulges in their squeamish excitement. Nobody, of course, really expects it to work, and even after their frantic flight from the scene, they still manage to convince themselves it was an elaborate prank played by their missing friend. There is a lot of tension between friends, both before and after, and the way Morgan plays on their anxieties is spot-on.
As for the succubus - after all, you did come for the Spermjackers From Hell (pun gleefully intended!) - she's a surprise I am hesitant about spoiling. In terms of physical appearance, she is nothing like what you expect, but in terms of erotic performance, she's everything you dreamed of . . . and had nightmares about. She preys on the darkest fantasies and fetishes of the town as much as she does their most innocent lusts and longings, giving them exactly what they think they crave most. Again, no spoilers, but when we finally get a glimpse of her lair . . . it is total nightmare fetish fuel, a horrifying fate that, despite its grotesque elements, still has a touch of forbidden attraction.
The final twist at the end was perfect, and I am almost embarrassed to say I didn't see it coming. With the door left open for a sequel, I would definitely be up for a second summoning, especially if it can deliver on some of those vignette teases.
Before we get into the story, I have to talk about the storytelling for a moment. This is a clever, self-aware, disjointed sort of narrative that begins near the end, before rewinding back to the start, with frequent vignettes where Morgan breaks the fourth wall and talks directly to the reader. On the positive side, the style creates some artificial tension, and serves to keep you on your toes, never knowing what's coming next. On the negative side, those vignettes feel like unfulfilled promises, teasing us with unholy erotic retributions that ultimately happen off the page, only to be recapped in passing. There's almost an entire second book waiting in those vignettes.
Okay, so back to the story. This starts out with your basic horror movie premise - a gang of slackers decide to summon a succubus, and plan to do it from within the bowels of the abandoned bomb shelter in the park. It's a great scenario and a great setting, and Morgan gleefully indulges in their squeamish excitement. Nobody, of course, really expects it to work, and even after their frantic flight from the scene, they still manage to convince themselves it was an elaborate prank played by their missing friend. There is a lot of tension between friends, both before and after, and the way Morgan plays on their anxieties is spot-on.
As for the succubus - after all, you did come for the Spermjackers From Hell (pun gleefully intended!) - she's a surprise I am hesitant about spoiling. In terms of physical appearance, she is nothing like what you expect, but in terms of erotic performance, she's everything you dreamed of . . . and had nightmares about. She preys on the darkest fantasies and fetishes of the town as much as she does their most innocent lusts and longings, giving them exactly what they think they crave most. Again, no spoilers, but when we finally get a glimpse of her lair . . . it is total nightmare fetish fuel, a horrifying fate that, despite its grotesque elements, still has a touch of forbidden attraction.
The final twist at the end was perfect, and I am almost embarrassed to say I didn't see it coming. With the door left open for a sequel, I would definitely be up for a second summoning, especially if it can deliver on some of those vignette teases.
January 5, 2025
Spermjackers From Hell
By Christine Morgan
“And male sex vampire, hey, that’s become pretty much synonymous with sexy male vampire. Down the torrid rabbit hole of paranormal romance you go, first they’re all brooding and dark and angsty and then they become sparkly little bitches and what the hell happened, people?”
This is an author who has been recommended to me often. Her books have been on my TBR, and even my kindle for quite some time. I finally made the time to read this gem, and holy fuck. I have no words. I truly do not think there’s ANY words I can type to do this book/author’s writing justice.
I don’t even know how to explain what the hell I just read. There is so freaking much to talk about, and I don’t even know where to start. The writing style was fucking phenomenal. The story overall was such a fun read. The characters were fantastic. And the formatting/story telling style?! Unique as fuuuuck and something I never knew I needed in my life. One of my notes to help sort of explain my live reaction was:
Wait. There’s like, teenage horror movie vibes.
Then poetry.
Plus interludes.
What the fuck? Is this perfection?
There is a really freaking solid chance that one of Morgan’s books is going to end up on my top 5 reads of 2025 list. Would not surprise me in the least. Would be more surprised if she didn’t.
This book really was perfection. Five fucking stars. Easily. Highly recommend. Read it. Now. Thank you. 🤌🏼
By Christine Morgan
“And male sex vampire, hey, that’s become pretty much synonymous with sexy male vampire. Down the torrid rabbit hole of paranormal romance you go, first they’re all brooding and dark and angsty and then they become sparkly little bitches and what the hell happened, people?”
This is an author who has been recommended to me often. Her books have been on my TBR, and even my kindle for quite some time. I finally made the time to read this gem, and holy fuck. I have no words. I truly do not think there’s ANY words I can type to do this book/author’s writing justice.
I don’t even know how to explain what the hell I just read. There is so freaking much to talk about, and I don’t even know where to start. The writing style was fucking phenomenal. The story overall was such a fun read. The characters were fantastic. And the formatting/story telling style?! Unique as fuuuuck and something I never knew I needed in my life. One of my notes to help sort of explain my live reaction was:
Wait. There’s like, teenage horror movie vibes.
Then poetry.
Plus interludes.
What the fuck? Is this perfection?
There is a really freaking solid chance that one of Morgan’s books is going to end up on my top 5 reads of 2025 list. Would not surprise me in the least. Would be more surprised if she didn’t.
This book really was perfection. Five fucking stars. Easily. Highly recommend. Read it. Now. Thank you. 🤌🏼
June 20, 2023
Interesting premise that doesn't really live up. Morgan has her own language kind of, when it comes to her prose, and I do find it interesting even if it comes across as somewhat adolescent. She also writes with a natural flow that is easy to read as well as easy to get pulled into. In this book, she excels at bringing characters to life. That's the positives.
As for the characters: Imagine The Big Bang Theory minus the wit and humor, minus the intelligent male characters, with Penny as a gothy game chick who has brains, and characters being rather unlikable, and that's what you got here. It reads like a derivative 90s sitcom intended for women who don't like men.
Speaking of that, there's this really weird and pointless male character who insists he never wants to marry, but fucks his dog every night. The reason this even exists is hard to figure out, because it's not funny and it doesn't play into the story at all. It seems like the author either has underlying issues with misandry, like it's some kind of chauvinist crime that a man chooses to be a bachelor; or, she has a thing for bestiality - maybe both.
The villain is almost nonexistent, and rather dull. We finally get something interesting and dark going at the end, very reminiscent of Clive Barker, but that's about it. I didn't find it to be a very enjoyable read, but there was some singularity to it in parts that made it sustainable, and enough ridiculousness to keep me reading.
I'm not sure I'd list this as extreme or splatterpunk, but it's not really horror, nor is it humor. I'm not sure which one of these it is meant to be. Maybe a splash of each? Either way, you might like it if you absolutely crave this little niche of the literary world.
As for the characters: Imagine The Big Bang Theory minus the wit and humor, minus the intelligent male characters, with Penny as a gothy game chick who has brains, and characters being rather unlikable, and that's what you got here. It reads like a derivative 90s sitcom intended for women who don't like men.
Speaking of that, there's this really weird and pointless male character who insists he never wants to marry, but fucks his dog every night. The reason this even exists is hard to figure out, because it's not funny and it doesn't play into the story at all. It seems like the author either has underlying issues with misandry, like it's some kind of chauvinist crime that a man chooses to be a bachelor; or, she has a thing for bestiality - maybe both.
The villain is almost nonexistent, and rather dull. We finally get something interesting and dark going at the end, very reminiscent of Clive Barker, but that's about it. I didn't find it to be a very enjoyable read, but there was some singularity to it in parts that made it sustainable, and enough ridiculousness to keep me reading.
I'm not sure I'd list this as extreme or splatterpunk, but it's not really horror, nor is it humor. I'm not sure which one of these it is meant to be. Maybe a splash of each? Either way, you might like it if you absolutely crave this little niche of the literary world.
March 27, 2023
The book is amazing and I loved the clever spin on the succubi. These are definetely more mermaid-like than demonic, which makes them more unpredictable and feral. Suffice to say that you might want to change your mind if you're reading this expecting to see the demon on the front cover, she does make an appearance, but not as you expect.
However I would've liked to have some closure on some of the storylines instead of leaving them hanging for the sequel. I could live by not knowing what's Enoch Shaw's deal, but I would like to know more about the witch burnings in fairmont and how does it relate to the current events of the book, specially Jake's family.
I would've like to have some closure on Cynthia's storyline, as well as Devon's and Spencer. It feels like the character who has a more consistent arc is Brendan and the derelitcs, which appear in a span of I would say, 20 pages tops. Because at least we get to see what happens to them at the end, we know what their origins were and how those tie to their ultimate fate. Something I can't say about the other characters.
Eagerly expecting the sequel and hoping to find more answers.
However I would've liked to have some closure on some of the storylines instead of leaving them hanging for the sequel. I could live by not knowing what's Enoch Shaw's deal, but I would like to know more about the witch burnings in fairmont and how does it relate to the current events of the book, specially Jake's family.
I would've like to have some closure on Cynthia's storyline, as well as Devon's and Spencer. It feels like the character who has a more consistent arc is Brendan and the derelitcs, which appear in a span of I would say, 20 pages tops. Because at least we get to see what happens to them at the end, we know what their origins were and how those tie to their ultimate fate. Something I can't say about the other characters.
Eagerly expecting the sequel and hoping to find more answers.
Displaying 1 - 30 of 51 reviews