Depression & Other Magic Tricks

by Sabrina Benaim

Depression & Other Magic Tricks is the debut book by Sabrina Benaim, one of the most-viewed performance poets of all time, whose poem ''Explaining My Depression to My Mother'' has become a cultural phenomenon with over 50,000,000 views.

Depression & Other Magic Tricks explores themes of mental health, love, and family. It is a documentation of struggle and triumph, a celebration of daily life and of living. Benaim's wit, empathy, and gift for language produce a work of endless wonder.

Genres: Poetry, Mental Health, Nonfiction, Mental Illness, Psychology, Contemporary, Adult

96 pages, Kindle Edition

First published August 18, 2017

Reviews

[may ➹ · Rating 2 out of 5]

I appreciate / this author as a poet / and I recognize that what she writes is poetry / but the formatting got / very / annoying / for / me / to / read

I didn’t understand / certain things that were going on / even though / I know it talks about depression / and heartbreak / and healing / and even though sometimes poetry is meant to be / confusing / and make you / think

there were some / individual lines / that were beautiful and gorgeously written / but as a whole / the poems were all over the place / and it was / hard to follow / its meaning

[Natalie · Rating 3 out of 5]

Waking up to the news that Sabrina Benaim had released a poetry collection genuinely put a smile on my face this morning.

Depression & Other Magic Tricks is the debut book by Sabrina Benaim, one of the most-viewed performance poets of all time, whose poem "Explaining My Depression to My Mother" has become a cultural phenomenon with over 50 million views. Depression & Other Magic Tricks explores themes of mental health, love, and family. It is a documentation of struggle and triumph, a celebration of daily life and of living. Benaim's wit, empathy, and gift for language produce a work of endless wonder.

I was pleased to find that her voice, both written and spoken, is so distinguished that it’s impossible not to hear it while reading. However, unlike her live slam poems where you can feel her passion translate over onto you, in Depression & Other Magic Tricks I failed to experience the same.

While reading this collection there just wasn’t ever that moment of epiphany of "YES! I can relate and understand because I feel that way too." My attention was solely focused on trying to decipher what each poem meant and also who it’s supposed to be directed at. I never really felt like we got a solid look into the themes promised in the blurb above, rather just mentions of it. I feel like most of the pieces were more on loneliness and breakups and romance, as opposed to a sharp focus on mental health. So I repeatedly felt as if I'd missed something major upon completing each poem and like I was in way over my head with this.

Still, I'd like to include three works that sparked something indescribable in me:



 



 



Overall, though my expectations for Sabrina Benaim's poetry collection weren't quite met, I'm still glad I got the chance to read new works by her.

ARC kindly provided by the publisher in exchange for an honest review.

Expected publication: August 8th, 2017

Note: I’m an Amazon Affiliate. If you’re interested in buying  Depression & Other Magic Tricks, just click on the image below to go through my link. I’ll make a small commission!


This review and more can be found on my blog.

[Aya · Rating 1 out of 5]

1.5 stars. Such a disappointment!

I was so excited for this collection because I loved her poem "Explaining Depression to my Mother", but it didn't meet my high expectations at all.
To be honest, I didn't like any of the poems in this collection except "Explaining Depression to my Mother"!

I expected to read poems about depression, but the collection focused on the failure of a relationship, how she missed her lover a lot, and how she can't get past this relationship.. which I didn't care that much about.

This was badly marketed, and I felt deceived by the end of it.

*Thank you to NetGalley and Button Poetry for providing me with this ARC in exchange for an honest review*

[Shai · Rating 4 out of 5]

This poetry book of Sabrian Benaim should be included in the list of bestsellers! The poems included in this collection really captured how those who suffers depression or heartbreak really felt. I'd read some contemporary or present-day bestselling poetry books and those are incomparable on how really good this book is.

[aly ☆彡 (on vacation) · Rating 2 out of 5]

I've read the poet's recent release and decided to give this debut book a try to see whether it was her previous book that does not resonate with me, or it's the overall format and writing of the author that is not working for me.

“my heart has developed a kind of amnesia, where it remembers everything but itself.”

The central focus of Depression & Other Magic Tricks is on mental health, notably depression where the author goes into detail of how depression entered her life as well as how it has affected her which I find way better than I Love You, Call Me Back: Poems. I feel like I could relate to myself more with the first half of the book. I personally love the page titled 'Single' and how it speaks to me.

I believe that poetry should express what the author needs to say in the way that they need to say it, however many of the poems in this book were formatted in such a way that they were difficult to understand and practically hard to get lost in. I specifically didn't get /this style of writing/ despite my best efforts/ and i still don't/

It was the same with her most recent book, for which I believe only she understands the meaning and the purpose. The poems about mental health are actually quite good, but there are only maybe few of them that are truly worth reading. I really thought this might be "not you but me problem" but after giving a try on both of her works, I believe there is still room for refinement.

Too bad, I've come to a conclusion that Benaim’s poems are just not for me.

[2.5/5]

[Jennifer · Rating 4 out of 5]

Sometimes I need beautiful, empathizing words to help me process my mood when life goes a bit haywire. Poetry collection: Depression & Other Magic Tricks was glowing on my computer screen looking for reviewers so I took it as a sign that it was meant to be. As is typical with any art form, I found myself connecting with some of Sabrina Benaim's poems more than others but they were all very good. My favorites include Explaining My Depression To My Mother, Girl Beside You, A Plain Truth, How to Fold a Memory, The Other Side of a Memory, On Releasing Light, Poem From Last August California Trip//Yearly Maintenance, Girl Behind You, and Seven Small Ways in Which I Loved Myself This Week. This collection discusses themes related to mood, mental health, family, relationships, and self-care. The about the author section indicates Ms. Benaim is seasoned in the art of poetry slam, a type of performance poetry, and I could visualize voice and movement for many of these poems. I personally have never heard of Sabrina Benaim before but I now have a new writer of beautiful words to keep an eye out for!

Thank you to the following for permitting me access to an advance reader's copy (ARC) of Depression & Other Magic Tricks. This generosity did not impact my honesty when rating/reviewing.
Source: NetGalley
Author: Sabrina Benaim
Publisher: Button Poetry, Independent Book Publishers Association (IBPA)
Pub Date: 22 Aug 2017
Genre: Health, Mind & Body, Poetry

[Reading_ Tamishly · Rating 4 out of 5]

One poetry collection I have loved reading.

I am so glad I read this book which has everything regarding the feelings, the misunderstandings and the wants/needs of someone who is suffering from depression.
The lines analyse how depression actually is even when who you consider the closest to do not understand mental health illnesses and conditions, how it can affect those who are suffering from it but ending up misunderstood and misinterpreted as something they assume.
Only the one who is going through it knows how it is, what it is like and how others discriminate people with mental health issues.

This collection made me think about the various social issues when it comes to mental health. Yes, I was looking for a poetry collection which deals with mental health and which would make me think and have a fair idea about it through the contents of this poetry collection.
I came to realise how difficult it is to cope with mental health issues while reading it.
The lines are as honest as they get. They have this genuine touch in them.

I really love how easy it was for me to read this one yet going through various shades of emotions with each passing page! I could really connect with the writer and I was able to understand what the lines meant to convey.
This book is just not only about mental health issues. It talks about how we are as a person, how different and alike we are from our parents, what being single feels like (out of context maybe but relatable sadly), loneliness, being in love and the usual things one loves!

A simple yet effective read.

[destiny ♡ howling libraries · Rating 3 out of 5]

"i held hands
with my sadness,
sang it songs in the shower,
fed it lunch,
got it drunk
& put it to bed early."

I was delighted to receive an ARC of this book, because I've seen Sabrina's infamous poetry recitals floating around facebook and youtube, and love her rawness and authenticity. Unfortunately, her collection doesn't quite live up to expectations; I found that her best works were the ones I'd already heard and read, and a bit of the rest of the book is repetitive. That said, she's still an incredible poet and I'd recommend checking her work out if you enjoy sad, anxious words about unrequited love and mental health struggles.

Thank you to NetGalley and Button Poetry for providing me with this ARC in exchange for an honest review!

[Romie · Rating 3 out of 5]

I am torn.
Am I the only one who felt kinda meh?

I related to the poems about depression, they were seriously beautiful, it felt like reading about my own emotions sometimes.
There is something extremely vulnerable about this poetry collection, something genuine and real, which makes it hurt even more when you read it, reading about the author's depression and anxiety truly made me want to hide under my blanket and cry. It was beautiful.

But some of the poems . . . I felt like some of them were just there to fill some space.

my mother the tree who cut and whittled herself to build me a boat offering safe passage.

3.5

Thank you Netgalley for providing me an e-arc in exchange for an honest review.

[Amal Bedhyefi · Rating 1 out of 5]

I was eager to read this collection ever since I've heard her perform "Explaining Depression to my Mother" which i've found while scrolling down youtube.
However , and unfortunately , it didn't meet my high expectations at all.
To be honest, I didn't like any of the poems in this collection except that one.
I expected to read poems about depression, but the collection was rather on her love life failures .
I don't know if it is just me , but is this really poetry? i get it that nowadays modern poetry is taking over " the real" poetry , but this is way too much.
It's pointless and a complete waste of time.

[Cam (justabookeater) · Rating 5 out of 5]

This collection hit me hard, in the best way possible. I didn't realize I had actually seen this poetess perform online before until I read one poem that seemed so familiar. This collection centers mainly on the author's depression and anxiety. The free verse demonstrates this constant struggle beautifully. I could easily relate to a great majority of the poems as someone who deals with these illnesses herself.

[☘Misericordia☘ ⚡ϟ⚡⛈⚡☁ ❇️❤❣ · Rating 3 out of 5]

I think it could've been a nice read but for some reason it didn't resonate with me at all.

Nothing striking.

The rest's as usual: random words gathered into prettying strings... The magic... it just wasn't in there.

[Diana · Rating 1 out of 5]

While I loved her on button poetry with her poem "Explaining depression to my mother" I have to say that this book didn't work for me. I was very excited when I saw that she was publishing a book, and was expecting it to arrive. Then I learned it was, obviously, a poem book rather than a book explaining or talking about depression as such. But I enjoyed so much seeing her reading/feeling the beforementioned poem that I thought "Why not? I know I don't usually go for this kind of books, but her interpretation was so emotive, so raw, that I can like her book". Wrong of me to think that.

See, the book itself is great for people who like her work, it has her style and talks about depression and family and things that you feel or felt and have made you this way you are now. But what I really liked was her interpretation of the depression poem. So reading her did nothing for me, most of her poems were jumbled up words. I even went to see more of her readings to see if they could help me feel more the book, but no luck. She has some good ones here and there on the book, but the majority of them seemed like jumbled up words to me, some without making much sense and being a mere chain of words that tail together so she can began anew verse (the first poem, "Hello" is proof of this).

So, sadly it wasn't a lecture I enjoyed, even thought I wanted to.

[eleni · Rating 5 out of 5]

well I cried a lot

[Jessi ❤️ H. Vojsk [if villain, why hot?] · Rating 4 out of 5]

„We wanted to believe her when she said she was fine
Just fine / all right / okay / busy / good / okay / fine
We thought she would have come to us
If she was having any trouble we would have done anything to help
All we’ve ever wanted was for her to be happy
We did not understand why she would not stop crying
Even when we held her down to the couch begging her to“

Really beautiful texts about anxiety, depression and other illnesses.

[Schizanthus Nerd · Rating 4 out of 5]

poetry and i usually don't mix / we repel like opposing ions / my synapses don't fire / when sparked by verse / however / a flame was lit at the start / kindled by depression and anxiety / yet heartbreak's oxygen did not fan the flames / satisfied yet / desiring more like / explaining my depression to my mother / a conversation

i don't know sabrina benaim / never heard her voice / yet depression and i are old buddies / we dance around each other / and make somber music / in the dark recesses of my mind / we love yet hate / one another but / we continue our duet

at times i am sure my getaway car / has obscured my shadow in dust / then i turn the corner / and the sunlight causes me / to glance behind with horror / my shadow has grown large / absorbing the light / and creeps closer / as it follows / sabrina you exhale with eloquence / shine light upon the dark / adjust focus so we can see / the hope depression conceals

anxiety can pick me / out of a line up / loneliness of knowing / in a crowded room / i'm the only one / from my tribe / despair at lack / of understanding / treated like a curiosity / different / not enough

heartbreak / a foreign land / i am an alien there / yet made clear / by hearing sabrina

dark / depression / loneliness / heartbreak / anxiety / despair / swirl into one / flood of emotion / aching / desert of nothingness / numbness / muddy clay that distorts / yet resilience / hope / light

gratitude / netgalley / gratitude / button poetry / gratitude / independent book publishers association / my thoughts for free / lasting impression / set aside other words / drink in this offering / to be returned to again / and again / to sip / to guzzle / to absorb / no regrets

[Sarah · Rating 2 out of 5]

A lot of this was about heartbreak after a breakup and that’s not what I was expecting. It’s also not what I was interested in. I found some of her poems to be mildly interesting but others were lacklustre. I think she had a few interesting themes but again, the main focus was about heartbreak and to be honest, I found it boring.

I liked how she formatted poems in different ways but some of it was almost painful to look at and then other bits literally sounded like nonsense. I could sort of relate to some of the stuff she said but the main thing I liked about the book was the impression the poems gave me of Sabrina herself. The poems made me root for her and like her, I’m just not big on the actual poems.

I would not recommend this & I don’t think I would read anything else by Sabrina Benaim.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“my heart is a messy bedroom i always distract myself from cleaning.”

“the first step to connection is communication.”

“sure, i make plans.
i make plans but i don’t want to go.
i make plans because i know i should want to go,
i know at some point i would have wanted to go,
it’s just not that much fun having fun when you don’t
want to have fun.”

“do the clocks know their only job is to evenly measure out our lifespans...”

[Sara ➽ Ink Is My Sword · Rating 4 out of 5]

Copy provided by Netgalley in exchange for an honest review, thank you.

4 Perfect poetry for staged presentation Stars

"is it okay if my definition of free is yet to be determined..". Highly identify with this quote.

As a person who writes poetry and does slam poetry, I really enjoyed this compilation of poems. I have seen some average reviews because although some pieces really spoke to the reader's soul, it was mostly meh. I think these poems were written to be slam poetry, and after doing a quick search Sabrina Benaim is actually a slam poet in Button Poetry Channel, you can see various of the poems in the book performed. Her writing style is more directed to tell a story, so the poems are not exactly encrypted for us to guess what is the real meaning. As I said before, they are made to be delivered through voice.

I personally could form a connection with her writing and the topics she wrote about, depression is quite a powerful theme to write about. I found this book deeply personal, and I am thankful for Sabrina to let us in. Although, I do have to agree that sometimes the poems seemed a little disconnected of an overall theme. That's what usually happens with new poets, making a book with just the poems they have written, but not following a theme through it all.

Favorite Poems:
+(i)
+girl be side you
+how to fold a memory
+gravity speaks
+on releasing light
+another plain truth
+on the last gesture between us
+so my friend tells me she identifies as a mermaid...
+dear Beyoncé (III)
+girl behind you
+seven small ways in which I love d myself this week
+follow-up a prayer/ a spell
+so, I'm talking about depression...
+single
+explaining my depression to my mother a conversation

Highly recommend it for spoken poetry fans :)

[Jennifer ~ TarHeelReader · Rating 4 out of 5]

Sabrina Benaim is a performance poet popular on Youtube, and I had heard of her poem she wrote to explain her experience with depression to her mother. This collection included that poem and many others about Sabrina's experiences. Beautifully and poignantly written, every poem is deeply personal.

Thank you to Sabrina Benaim for bravely and eloquently sharing her experiences, and to the publisher and Netgalley, for the opportunity to read this collection fo poetry.

[Sarah · Rating 3 out of 5]

This was really well written but I'm a little torn on it. Some poems were beautiful (especially the ones on mental health) but some were just okay so it's hard to rate as a whole.

"mom says where did the anxiety come
from?
anxiety is the cousin visiting from out of town
depression felt obligated to bring to the party.
mom i am the party.
only i am the party i don't want to be at."

"if i am late it is because i was too anxious to leave"

[Rissa · Rating 4 out of 5]

4.5⭐️
Some of the Chapters were pure gold while others pulled on my heart strings. It was simply beautiful.

“ If I am holding you without hands how am I supposed to let go”

[Michelle · Rating 5 out of 5]

Depression and Other Magic Truths is by Sabrina Benaim, Canadian poetess, spoken word and dance performer, she lives in Toronto. This superb debut poetry collection explores many truths surrounding the stigma of mental illness: depression is no longer a taboo topic, the many ways of coping and working through episodes, and most important, the path to recovery and wellness is possible.

Close to her mother, Benaim was concerned how she will talk to her: “explaining my depression to my mother”. In the darkness of her illness she fears death—not her own but her mother’s. Leaning on her mother for support she writes: “I am afraid of living/Mom, I am lonely/I think I learnt it when Dad left;/how to turn the anger into lonely/the lonely into busy…” Parental abandonment is difficult to deal with in any case, and was symbolized by an abandoned house.

In the poem “single” Benaim writes about her fondness for sweat pants, careless grooming habits, and avoidance of answering the phone. “the loneliest sweet potato” recalls going to the supermarket, the effort to hide her depression as she chooses her lemons and avocados, the effort it takes to appear like everyone else. “how to unfold a memory//the Kentucky heartbreak shuffle” is a telling longer autobiographical poem of rural country life: barrels of Kentucky Bourbon, cornmeal fried catfish, the street lamps, swings on the wrap around porches, the American Flags, and the sweltering heat.
It was surprising that the organized poetic sequences beginning with “magic trick 001” to the final “magic trick 005” deal with symbolism and creative metaphorical lyrics. Many of these verses feature an enjoyable lighter direction, away from the seriousness of depressive illness. The titles of most of the poems are usually featured in lower case: “so my friend tells me she identifies as a mermaid”- “on platonic love being the real thing”- seven small ways in which I loved myself this week” .

On occasion, Beyonce serves as a popular muse in modern (Millennial) poetry. Benaim’s poems that include Beyonce: “dear Beyonce” (I)- “dear Beyonce” (II). Previously, “There Are More Beautiful Things Than Beyonce” (2016) was a poetry release by Morgan Parker. Beyonce appeared on social media in her maternal glory over the summer (2017)-- inside a spectacular floral arch with her newborn “beybe” twins.
This thoughtful insightful collection is hopeful and encouraging, illustrating numerous ways Benaim faced her troubles and depressive symptoms—fortunately she wrote poetry, found love and happily recovered. **With thanks to Button Poetry/Exploding Pinecone Press via NetGalley for the direct e-copy for the purpose of review.

[- ̗̀ jess ̖́- · Rating 3 out of 5]

I don't read much modern poetry, but as someone with depression, I was quite drawn to the title of this collection. Benaim's collection is about her experiences with depression in several poems. I felt like it was very true and from the heart and for the most part I liked the poems. Some poems definitely resonated with me more than others - the romantic ones I didn't connect with much, but the ones about sadness and loneliness I felt in my bones.

Benaim has a voice that so direct and frank yet beautifully poetic, which is something I don't see often and it works so well with this topic. I feel like this makes her poems very relatable, especially to fellow sufferers of depression, and I enjoyed reading this poetry collection.

*Thanks to the publisher & Netgalley for the review copy.

[sher · Rating 3 out of 5]

I'm reviewing this book provided by NetGalley.

Poetry, poetry, poetry. Oh, how complex, beautiful, and incredibly personal and public it can be.

I'm a huge fan of poetry, from Rumi to Langston Hughes, Marie de France to Edgar Allan Poe, Ernest Hemmingway to Lang Leav, and all the new, emerging poets. Everyone has a different taste in poetry, and for me, it varies. I love poems so nuanced that they suspend me in a state of infinite profundity. I love topics that discuss mental health, trauma, recovery, fables, and love stories. Depression & Other Magic Tricks has all these points. But another thing I love is poetic structure. Unlike some new poets' poetic structure choice, Sabrina Benaim's style made sense to me. I understood why a poem was written in a certain format, however, it did distract me from the content just a bit. On another note, I recommend watching Benaim perform some of her pieces! (ALSO, SHE'S TORONTONIAN! Love it when I get to read an author from my city!)

I loved the representation of depression and anxiety in this book and I loved how I could find myself in the verses. And since poetry is completely subjective, Benaim's voice and experiences were heard and understood in all their personal, nuanced glory. Yet there was something that just didn't click with me to give it a 5 star. This is a case of it's not you, it's me so some readers may thoroughly agree and/or disagree with me, and that's okay. Poetry is subjective and universal and personal and just as complex as the poems themselves.

her name is wooden ship, to try & fit it
into his glass bottle heart would only break her.

----

we did not understand why she would not
stop crying
even when we held her down to the couch
begging her to

----

OR are you just trying to say you’re magic, BUT not that regular, pedestrian, witch-type magic. is mermaid magic better? is this common public knowledge? OR is it just easier to look at yourself in the mirror if you are not human. does that make it easier to pretend you don’t have depression; because depression is exclusively human. if so…shoot…maybe i am a mermaid too.

----

i was inside looking out,
finally.

[AleJandra · Rating 4 out of 5]

4 How to connect in a world like this STARS

Hace un par de días vagando en Facebook, un video salvaje apareció. Sabrina Benaim recitando su poema explaining my depression to my mother , y no tienen idea lo mucho que me afectaron sus versos y mucho más la pación con la que Sabrina se expresaba.



Inmediatamente me puse a buscar más información sobre ella, que me llevo a encontrar este libro, ese poema que tanto me gusto viene incluido aquí, y si es uno de mis favoritos.

Sería fácil comparar este libro con otros de poesía contemporánea, y mientras tienen muchas cosas en común, creo que lo que diferencia es que no es tan directo, no es del tipo que te dice las cosas a la cara y de una manera cruda, la autora utiliza muchas metáforas y analogías, te lleva por varios caminos en una sola oración y te deja muchísimas cosas a la interpretación. Es decir, no trata de explicarte lo que es vivir con una enfermedad mental, de una forma absoluta, simplemente te da su versión de ella, una visión que no siempre es clara o concisa, y al final es lo que le da mayor hermosura, ya que cada uno como lector le dará la interpretación necesaria.

Muy bueno, muy recomendable, para releerlo una infinidad de veces.

[Brandon Forsyth · Rating 5 out of 5]

You might know Sabrina Benaim from her reading of "explaining my depression to my mother: a conversation", a video of which went viral this past spring. That poem is haunting, read with such passion that you can't help but be affected by it. The words are beautiful, honest and raw, but the reading is ground-shattering, tearful and anxious, on the verge of a collapse that brings out your best, empathetic self. Benaim's spoken word expertise adds an element that I feared I would miss in reading her words.

Nope.

I mean, yes, I'll pay good money to hear her read other poems, but holy smokes, the written poems are just as strong and powerful, in a wonderfully different way. Beanim's use of space and punctuation are just as masterful as her control over her voice, and even reading "explaining depression" adds another element that the spoken piece doesn't quite have. I loved these poems, I savoured them and devoured them in equal measure. Benaim's exploration of depression and anxiety and heartbreak are needed right now, and as a bookseller, I can't wait to share this book with as many people as I can. You have to check this out when it releases in August.

[Renata · Rating 2 out of 5]

1.5

It was not what I expected honestly, I only liked a few poems and the format...perhaps it wasn't for me but in some parts it was really annoying to keep reading and it made me feel really frustrated.

The book is about the main character failing in her relationship and I understand it's awful but...I don't know how to express it but definitely not what I expected and not what I enjoyed the most. I'm actually pretty happy it was a short and fast read.

[Lia Strange · Rating 3 out of 5]

"depression felt obligated to bring to the party.
Mom, i am the party.
Only, i am a party i don't want to be at."

Su mejor poema es "explicándole mi depresión a mi madre" y es que es algo tan real y tan duro, pero luego no me logre encontrar ni en la mitad de los poemas.

[Alison · Rating 3 out of 5]

I think...I actually...liked this???
Unsure if I enjoyed this because it really connected with me and my situations recently, or if because it felt like these were more original than most modern poetry I read.

[Ammara Abid · Rating 3 out of 5]

i tell
my grandmother
i think love is
a hungry caterpillar