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What We Remember

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Every family has a hidden story--even the perfect ones. In this suspenseful and deeply moving novel, Michael Thomas Ford propels us beyond smiling holiday photographs and beloved anecdotes to explore the complex ties within one family--and between two very different brothers whom catastrophe will either unite or divide forever. . .On the morning James McCloud, a Seattle district attorney, gets a call from his sister, he senses his own long-buried family history is about to be dragged into the light. James's father, Daniel, a police officer, disappeared eight years ago. Now his body has been found. James always believed his father committed suicide. But the evidence leaves no doubt: Daniel was murdered.

James immediately returns to Cold Falls, New York, to be with the rest of his family. Among them is his brother, Billy, twenty-one, gay, and even more troubled than James remembers. James was always the golden child, Billy the disappointment. Time has not healed their differences, but events may drastically change their roles. For when James's high school ring is discovered with Daniel's body, he becomes the prime suspect. And as the truth emerges, piece by piece, Billy finds himself amid a swirl of secrets and lies powerful enough to decide his brother's fate, threaten yet another life, and destroy the bonds that still remain. . .

"A fast-moving yet thoughtful exploration of family love and the things we do in its name." --"Booklist"

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First published October 1, 2008

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About the author

Michael Thomas Ford

61 books805 followers
Michael Thomas Ford is the author of more than 75 books in genres ranging from humor to horror, literary fiction to nonfiction. His work for adult readers includes the best-selling novels What We Remember, The Road Home, Changing Tides, Full Circle, Looking for It and Last Summer, and his five essay collections in the "Trials of My Queer Life" series. His novel Lily was a Tiptree Award Longlist title and a finalist for both the Lambda Literary Award and the Shirley Jackson Award. He is also the author of the Sickening Adventures series of books featuring popular contestants from RuPaul's Drag Race.

As a writer for young adults he is the author of the novels Suicide Notes, Z, and Love & Other Curses, and under the name Isobel Bird he wrote the popular "Circle of Three" series. His work has been nominated for 14 Lambda Literary Awards, twice winning for Best Humor Book, twice for Best Romance Novel, and once for Best Mystery. He was also nominated for a Horror Writers Association Bram Stoker Award (for his novel The Dollhouse That Time Forgot).

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5 stars
112 (33%)
4 stars
112 (33%)
3 stars
88 (26%)
2 stars
18 (5%)
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5 (1%)
Displaying 1 - 30 of 34 reviews
Profile Image for Nick Pageant.
Author 6 books935 followers
January 18, 2015
Michael Thomas Ford is a great writer and this is a great book. I was hooked from the beginning and it just got better and better.

The story is a murder mystery at its core, but also explores family dynamics in a way that most mysteries do not.

The plot structure was unusual; it's laid out with varying points of view and time-jumps; these are two things that usually annoy me to no end, but here the techniques were used to enhance and propel the story forward. Each POV character had a little piece of the puzzle to contribute and each time jump was used keep the pages turning.



Profile Image for LenaRibka.
1,463 reviews433 followers
June 21, 2017
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It pains me a lot to rate this book under 4 stars - yes, because in spite of my personal issues with the story, I can't complain about the writing style - but for me What We Remember is probably the weakest novel I read until now by Michael Thomas Ford, BTW, one of my favourite authors.

I find also difficult to explain WHY this one is less satisfying for me. For the first time, while reading MTF, I have been torn between my objective and subjective liking/disliking and accompanying contradictions:

*** Ah…the plot. The mystery here is not your typical one. I'd say that it's rather a family drama. The reader has to deal with skeletons in the closet a lot of family's secrets. The most intriguing part of the mystery for me is always a mental process, the investigating part, a game of cat-and-mouse, the way HOW a case has been solved. There is no actually any investigation here. We have a district attorney as a main suspect, we have his girl friend, a counsellor, we have a family of a murdered sheriff(BTW, the main suspect is also his son), but we don't have any investigation. This mystery could have been solved 8 years ago. If the family members would have talked to each other.

*** We have, as always, a great character development. But on the contrary to his other books, I couldn't find ANYONE, not EVEN a single character to care about. Not to mention to LIKE anyone. A lot of family members, but pretty unsympathetic. Well, there was James, a main suspect in the murder case, but he wasn't really present in the story.

*** I don't consider it as a gay mystery. I know, MTF is a gay fiction writer(and a great one!), this book won the Lambda Literary Award in the category Gay Mystery, so...why do I complain?! Because I DON'T SEE IT AS A GAY MYSTERY. As a mystery, yes, but I have my own imaginations about the category. This one doesn't meet them IMO.

*** I'm not fussy. BUT THIS COVER...HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH THE BOOK.



My final verdict:

A great writing, an interesting family story, appropriate pacing, thrilling family drama, believable but not likeable characters, not strong enough but intriguing mystery atmosphere. Not my favourite by Michael Thomas Ford, but still an enjoyable read.


P.S. Blake Somerset did a great job.
Profile Image for Ije the Devourer of Books.
1,969 reviews58 followers
September 5, 2015
Excellent!

Michael Thomas Ford is an excellent writer and one of my favourite authors. So it isn't surprising that I liked this. Each MTF book is so different: from gentle family stories, to longer emotional sagas, to good old romances and now to this murder mystery overflowing with suspense.

I was gripped by the story from the first page and thank goodness I had a day off so I could let myself be taken off into the story and soak up the tension and the intense nature of some of the characters. I love a good mystery but this wasn't just good, it was weighty. A brilliant and weighty mystery with twists, turns and surprises which I couldn't have seen coming.

Daniel McCloud was believed to have committed suicide in 1983 but his body was never found. Now in 1991 his body has been found buried in a trunk and he was murdered. Daniel left behind a wife and three children but this isn't a close and loving family. Each family member has their own struggles and issues with the past. Celeste the oldest is married to Nate the sheriff and has two small children. She has never really been close to her youngest brother Billy or to James the middle child.

James is a District Attorney in Seattle. He has a great career and doesn't regret leaving his small home town. He was always the golden child and the talented one.

Billy is the black sheep of the family. He takes drugs but manages to hold down a job in the town's comic store. He is also gay and has never felt at home in his family. Right from childhood he felt the distance between himself and his siblings and he never felt his father approved of him.

Ada is the mother of the family. Her life with Dan had its ups and downs but she is shocked when her husband's body is found. She is even more shocked when evidence is found and James is accused of the murder. Nate her son in law insists he is doing his duty by accusing James of murder but there is long and deep resentment between the two.

And as the investigation gathers pace other resentment and truths come to light and dark secrets reveal things that were hidden beneath a superficial veneer of a respectable town. In the midst of this swirling pot of revelations Billy finds the strength for the first time in his life to redeem himself and his family by seeking the truth no matter the cost.

This was really thrilling and my best MTF to date although I love all his stories. I loved this one because I knew from the first word that all was not what it seemed. I also loved Billy the underdog and black sheep, and the way he evolves in the story to become a hero. Best of all I loved the jigsaw pieces - those seemingly inconsequential happenings and events, those passing observations and conversations that suddenly develop deeper meaning when pulled together.

And there was the suspense and the growing tension. I found myself holding my breath and tensing my muscles as I read and I just had to keep turning the page. Thank fully I resisted peeping at the end but it was so hard.

The story develops through flashbacks and the author did this really well, managing to hold the pace and flow of the story together and in a way that was seamless. My only criticism is that some of the main characters seemed to fade out at the end. I wanted to see their different reactions at the end instead of hearing about their reactions through other characters. I felt as if the story lost some of the character voices at the end but it was still a great read though.

A gripping and thoroughly enjoyable book!!
Profile Image for Stephen Osborne.
Author 80 books134 followers
March 20, 2013
A departure from Ford's usual fare, which isn't a bad thing. We have great writing, a tight plot, and believable characters as usual in a Ford novel. The chapters switch back and forth, past and present, which may put some people off. There are also quite a few characters, and we get to see parts of the story from ALL of their points of view, which also may put people off (a lot of head hopping). Neither of these devices bothered me. My only gripe (not enough to make me not like the book) is that NONE of the characters is really likable. Lawyer Charly and, strangely, drugged-out, burned out young Billy came closest to being likable. And can someone tell me what ANY of the covers has to do with the book??????
Profile Image for Paula´s  Brief Review.
1,176 reviews16 followers
March 23, 2021
Este libro daría para una buena miniserie en cualquiera de las plataformas de hoy en día porque cada capítulo ( y tiene un montón) piensas que el culpable es uno distinto, hay muchas historias paralelas a cada cual más intrigante, los personajes no son nada atractivos (realmente no te cae bien ni el muerto.....!) y consigue que estés en todo momento pendiente de cómo seguirá todo.
Cada capítulo pertenece a un año distinto (en una franja de 8 años que va alternado para atrás y para adelante constantemente), para mi gusto estos son muy cortos que no te dan tiempo a asimilar lo leído cuando ya cambias de año, lo que me resultó muy perjudicial para disfrutar bien de la historia y además considero que excesivamente largo, me costo horrores no abandonar.
Profile Image for Scottsdale Public Library.
3,534 reviews486 followers
Read
May 14, 2017
Who killed Sheriff Daniel McCloud? That's the premise behind this intriguing novel that explores the complex relationships between husbands and wives, brothers and sisters, and mothers and children. More than a murder mystery, this character study asks the age old question: can you ever truly know another person?

--Candy V.--
Profile Image for Matt Rhoades.
8 reviews1 follower
July 21, 2013
This murder mystery that is also a portrait of a family in small-town New York is marred by constant flitting between times. Normally, this isn't a problem but the chapters are so short, any narrative impetus is lost.
Profile Image for Nicolas Chinardet.
438 reviews109 followers
March 27, 2022
What We Remember is set along two alternating timelines, not quite ten years, when the discovery of a missing dead body brings past events back to the surface.

This is perhaps Ford's most accomplished book as a piece of writing but it was also somehow the one I perhaps enjoyed the least. What he has gained in polish, he has I think lost in passion.

This is perhaps due to the way he so carefully dishes out information throughout the book (something is hinted at in a "present" chapter before being narrated and explained in the followed "past" chapter); a restraint and holding back of information that becomes a little tedious in the end.

And talking of the end, it felt a little anti-climactic.
Profile Image for Adam Dunn.
673 reviews23 followers
July 28, 2015
This book really annoyed me; I don’t really know why I finished it. I guess I had never read the author before and I love Steve Walker, the artist who does his covers, though I will agree that neither of the covers had anything whatsoever to do with the book. The book had so many problems I found myself constantly gritting my teeth, and though it did become ever so slightly more readable at the end, it never got good or even okay.

Several problems:
1. No likeable characters.
2. No rational decisions from the characters.
3. In a book sold to gay men, we get:
“She found the sweet tender bud hidden among the warm folds and began to massage it while she fantasized about the man in the pictures.”
4. I took a writing class once and the teacher explained how to draw someone in and make them think. Your character gets a phone call from someone they dislike inviting them to a party. They say yes through gritted teeth. The reader knows they don’t want to go but the caller doesn’t, the reader gets the inside view, and they get to use their mind to work out that she doesn’t really want to go. This exact situation happens in this book but is of course followed by the sister explaining to the reader that she didn’t want to go. Well we know that, she just spent 20 pages bitching about the woman, give us some credit.
5. Shirley Jackson’s ‘The Lottery’ is explained with:
“…James had read it three times; each time he couldn’t believe that [Shirley] Jackson had written something so strange. It was weirder than a Stephen King story.”
This is the second Stephen King weird reference in the book. Get another reference.
6. All heterosexual characters look on the gay character badly and call him “queerboy” and other names. These are people who live with him and see him daily and in some cases even have sex with him, not all of these people would be homophobic! And I didn’t appreciate the constant use of anti-gay slurs.
7. At one point a character is charged with the murder and there are many, like 20, references to what a strong case there is against him.
“But if you’re sure he didn’t do it, we’re going to have to find some evidence to support it, because what there is now is pretty damning.”
Here’s the evidence. His ring was found the coffin of the dead man, placed there eight years ago. The end. I don’t know if you’ve looked up the word circumstantial in the dictionary but this is the definition. And so many times to keep going back to his impregnable guilt, it drove me crazy.
8. [spoiler] The murderer wasn’t blamed for the murder as she was a female so instead they blamed the man who was in the same room and unconscious at the time. His guilt is a given we are to go along with for the rest of the book. What?!?!?!
9. After the book is over, Billy, the alcoholic drug user, is sitting in a bar drinking alcohol and says he’s decided to give up drinking and start a new life. This is played for the happy ending. What alcoholic sitting in a bar with a drink hasn’t said this? I didn’t believe it for a second.
Profile Image for Dolphe.
238 reviews1 follower
March 14, 2010
I've read and enjoyed Michael Thomas Ford's previous novels which largely focused on gay life immersed in a variety of dramatic and comedic situations. With "What We Remember", he scores points for moving out of his comfort zone with what could best be described as a murder mystery wrapped in a backwoods family drama. For me, it possibly could have earned a five star if not for a couple of glaring problems. Without providing spoilers, let's just say those problems involved the main suspect and let's just say the author tends to re-introduce characters long after you've come close to forgetting about them. Still, I can overlook it all because the story still drew me in and kept me turning pages. Like an old friend said .. "the wine may not be the best, but it still gets ya hammered ..." LOL
Profile Image for Damian Serbu.
Author 13 books133 followers
January 7, 2010
Good read. As with all of Ford's novels, the characters are real, like people you meet every day. The murder mystery adds a twist that drives the novel and keeps the reader on her toes! Not as believable as some of his novels, but still a really good one that I recommend highly!
Profile Image for Grey853.
1,555 reviews61 followers
April 5, 2010
I've read several of Ford's books before and enjoyed them, but this one left me cold. One of the main devices, moving back and forth in time to tell the story, was very jarring. Plus, I really didn't like most of the characters.
33 reviews1 follower
April 30, 2021
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i absolutely adored this book. it's intense and graphic but all in way's that make the story so much more interesting and captivating.
one of my favorite parts of this book was how easy the author seemed to make writing relatability. the i've read many books where authors try too hard to make the characters and their actions seem relatable but end up making it more awkward and somehow, this book never falters in not doing that.
5/5 stars
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
Profile Image for Joseph.
289 reviews9 followers
October 11, 2024
A well written murder mystery that bounced between time periods of the disappearance of the victim, and when the victim was found. Excellent character study of a dysfunctional family. That it had gay characters in it was a plus.
451 reviews2 followers
September 1, 2019
Interesting read. Twists and turns. How one event starting with two people can change the course of many folks lives. The butterfly effect.
Profile Image for Scott Gundaker.
130 reviews
December 26, 2020
First Michael Thomas Ford book I have read. Loved it. This book definitely kept my interest the whole way throughout. Such a awesome story line. May just be my new favorite author. ❤
Profile Image for Aaron.
1,985 reviews61 followers
April 22, 2016
Family dynamics and secrets take center stage in this book that is set in a quiet little town in Maine. The story is told in alternating chapters, with some happening today (1991) and others set eight years before. Ford's fifth novel is actually a bit of a mystery centering around the death of Sheriff Dan McCloud 8 years earlier. It was assumed at the time that he had committed suicide after learning he had a form of terminal cancer. This was because his wife received a letter telling her so. People start to question this in the now when his body is found in a box in the woods. He has a gunshot wound that was clearly the cause of death.

His eldest son James is quickly identified as the primary suspect because his high school class ring was found with the body, but readers will find that there is a complex mix of characters, each with a complex back story, that all could have a possible motive for targeting Dan. Besides James, Dan also had daughter named Celeste and a younger son named Billy. James was always bitter over the fact that his parents were so against his dating Nancy, the daughter of Dan's best friend. Celeste was involved with a drug addict and boy only up to trouble named Paul. Poor Billy is the black sheep of the family who is not only looked down upon because he is gay, but he has also found himself settling into difficulties because of his own drug and alcohol problems.

Ford's strength has always been in his character creation and the rich backgrounds and perspectives he creates for them. This is definitely the case in this novel, and it allows for a strong set of developed suspects among Dan's family and some of the other connected characters in the book. His previous books have focused on the experiences of gay men, often men who are slightly older, and their coming of age in gay culture. This is not necessarily the case. While Billy is definitely gay, the book is really one focused on family drama and this murder mystery.

I always enjoy being drawn into the worlds and characters that Ford creates, and this book definitely does not disappoint. I always settle in and want to just enjoy the books. In fact, I feel like I can never get enough time to read them.

I am looking forward to the next book by Ford.
Profile Image for Anne Barwell.
Author 23 books108 followers
August 11, 2010
It took me a while to get into the story, more because I wasn't settling to read than the story itself though I suspect, but once I actually sat and started reading in concentrated blocks, this was a book I didn't want to put down, especially towards the end. It's definitely up to the author's usual standard, although the genre is a little different than what I was expecting. I did guess the identity of the murderer although not all of the details, and pleased with the way it worked out in the finish. He writes an ensemble cast extremely well, and this flowed seemlessly across shifting POVs and time frames. While one of the main characters is gay, it's not really the crux of the story nor would I class this as gay lit as I would with the other books of his I've read.
Profile Image for Wendell Hennan.
1,202 reviews4 followers
July 27, 2021
I just re read this and remembered nothing from the first read 11 years ago. This is not the author's usual type of story, a mystery, buried deep in two families, that returns to the surface 7 years later when Sheriff James McCloud's body is found when someone is building a cabin in the woods. His death was passed off as a suicide according to a note saying that he was dying of cancer and wanted to spare his family the final months of suffering. His oldest son's high school ring is found with the body and he is arrested for the murder. No one believes that James is guilty but he remains in jail until a daughter of family friends return to Cold Falls after being away for 7 years. A tense tale with very few of the characters being very likeable.
Profile Image for Noel.
110 reviews
October 5, 2025
Ten years ago, the McCloud family was hit with tragedy, only for it to come back with a vengeance, this time revealing secrets that were thought to be buried.

I love Michael's take on this family dynamic. As the story develops, my opinion of the characters constantly changes. You may find the characters irritating at first, but with a little perspective, you will develop understanding and compassion.

I recommend it to anyone who enjoys small-town gossip, family drama, and a touch of crime.
Profile Image for Sue.
677 reviews
January 22, 2023
"What We Remember" focuses on the murder of Sheriff McCloud. The story behind his disappearance 8 years before and the murder investigation in the present are told through the eyes of all of the characters in the book. The book switches back and forth from the past to the present giving the reader important information through the experiences of the characters.

I love this style of writing and Ford didn't disappoint. He is fast becoming one of my favorite authors.
Profile Image for Bill.
457 reviews
August 10, 2023
Several times while reading this book I was reminded of Agatha Christie mysteries. The body of a town sheriff has been discovered years after he disappeared leaving an alleged suicide note. The evidence found with the body however suggests the man was murdered.

Those closest to the deceased all have issues with the dead man that imply they could be responsible, everyone from his widow to his children, co-workers, and friends. But somehow it all felt a little contrived.
Profile Image for Ivka_s_knihou.
1,835 reviews37 followers
January 26, 2017
I loved the previous two books I read by Michael Thomas Ford. This was a complicated story about one pretty f*cked up family and I liked maybe one member of them, Billy, and only sometimes. To sum it all - for me this was a bit too much drama, no romance, no main character I could fall in love, over all a bit of a disappointment.
Profile Image for Steven Kruger.
130 reviews3 followers
September 12, 2010
Interesting in a middle-brow "Rashomon" kind of way. However, for everyone thinking this book will be one of Mr. Ford's "gay" novels, don't be fooled. Though there IS a gay character, that fact get very little "airplay" and isn't really core to the story.
Profile Image for Todd.
17 reviews
September 23, 2011
I enjoy his books and they usually take place near where I grew up. There is always a quirk with some dialogue or timeline that will leave feeling as though the editor missed something. I find myself looking for these in the authors writings. It adds to the fun.
Profile Image for Mj.
122 reviews3 followers
November 28, 2014
i never guessed right. I changed my guess at least 3 times and was still wrong, but thats whats great about it. Nate's a weirdo i mean...he's clearly not all the way there. @ anyrate, it was a a good read
Profile Image for Mary.
84 reviews8 followers
January 28, 2010
Great story that alternated each chapter between past and present. It kept you guessing on who killed the father and with each chapter, you saw it could be someone else. Very good read!
Profile Image for Douglas Elliott.
2 reviews
Currently reading
July 7, 2010
Recently I went to the Lambda Literary awards in NYC. This book won an award and it sounded interesting. So far, I love it!
18 reviews
October 3, 2010
Not one of Ford's best, but still better than most gay themed fiction out there.
Displaying 1 - 30 of 34 reviews

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