The Unsayable: The Hidden Language of Trauma

by Annie G. Rogers

In her twenty years as a clinical psychologist, Annie Rogers has learned to understand the silent language of girls who will not–who cannot–speak about devastating sexual trauma. Abuse too painful to put into words does have a language, though, a language of coded signs and symptoms that conventional therapy fails to understand. In this luminous, deeply moving book, Rogers reveals how she has helped many girls find expression and healing for the sexual trauma that has shattered their childhoods.

Rogers opens with a harrowing account of her own emotional collapse in childhood and goes on to illustrate its significance to how she hears and understands trauma in her clinical work. Years after her breakdown, when she discovered the brilliant work of French psychoanalyst Jacques Lacan, Rogers at last had the key she needed to unlock the secrets of the unsayable. With Lacan’s theory of language and its layered associations as her guide, Rogers was able to make startling connections with seemingly unreachable girls who had lost years of childhood, who had endured the unspeakable in silence.

At the heart of the book is the searing portrait of the girl Rogers calls Ellen, brutally abused for three years by her teenage male babysitter. Over the course of seven years of therapy, Rogers helped Ellen find words for the terrible things that had happened to her, face up to the unconscious patterns through which she replayed the trauma, and learn to live beyond the shadows of the past. Through Ellen’s story, Rogers illuminates the complex, intimate unraveling of trauma between therapist and child, as painful truths and their consequences come to light in unexpected ways.

Like Judith Herman’s Trauma and Recovery and Kay Redfield Jamison’s An Unquiet Mind, The Unsayable is a book with the power to change the way we think about suffering and self-expression. For those who have experienced psychological trauma, and for those who yearn to help, this brave, compelling book will be a touchstone of lucid understanding and true healing.

Genres: Psychology, Nonfiction, Mental Health, Psychoanalysis, Social Work, Memoir, Self Help

320 pages, Hardcover

First published August 8, 2006

About the author

Annie G. Rogers is a writer and Professor of Psychoanalysis and Clinical Psychology at Hampshire College in Amherst, Massachusetts. The recipient of a Fulbright Fellowship in Ireland, and a Radcliffe Fellowship at Harvard University, she is the author of A Shining Affliction (Penguin Viking, 1995), Charlie's Chasing the Sheep (Lismore Books, 2003), and The Unsayable: The Hidden Language of Trauma (Random House, 2006). She has published poetry and short fiction, and currently is writing a novel. She lives a bi-located life in Lismore and in Amherst, in the US.

Reviews

[Thomas · Rating 4 out of 5]

"I saw that what is so terrible about trauma is not abuse itself, no matter the brutality of treatment, but the way terror marks the body and then becomes invisible and inarticulate. This was the case even when someone could tell a story or reconstruct a memory. There was always something unsayable, too."

What a provocative, difficult, and compelling read. In her book The Unsayable, clinical psychologist Annie Rogers details her work with survivors of sexual abuse. She analyzes her experiences with children and adolescents through a Lacanian framework, which in essence posits that trauma and the unconscious mind manifest through language. Rogers also writes about her own history of overcoming abuse and the methods she used to treat a variety of girls and young women.

As an English and Psychology double major, I loved Rogers's emphasis on language and its role in trauma. She draws several insights about how those affected by horrible abuse often create their own unique forms of expression for the sake of survival. I would not recommend this book to those who feel uncomfortable reading about sexual abuse, because Rogers writes with a piercing amount of detail. However, she also writes with sensitivity and tact, and her anecdotes about acting as a guide alongside these survivors inspire hope, as well as admiration for her skill and warmth as a therapist.

My only qualm with The Unsayable stems from Rogers's writing about Lacanian theory. While I enjoyed learning about it, I felt that she could have explained it in more depth. She also could have delineated its applications to therapy. Still, I commend her for arguing in favor of her own approach as a psychologist, in particular because it does not mesh 100% with the cognitive and behavioral methods so often lauded today. Before I end the review, quote I found meaningful that stresses the importance of language:

"The real unsayable of trauma is the trauma of language itself. Our use of language makes us human, and in our humanity we create the worlds we're bent on destroying. If you do not believe words create destruction and trauma, listen to the language of war, how we use the name of God, justice, goodness, peace, and reparation, all to justify endless violence. Think of the harm we do one another all the time, how we use words to cover it, as if we are not responsible. At this time in human history I think it's crucial to speak into the terrible puzzle of human torment and destruction that we perpetrate on one another with words, with the very way we name things - because our words precede and justify our actions."

Overall, a worthwhile read I would recommend to anyone interested int eh trauma surrounding sexual abuse, Freudian or Lacanian psychoanalysis, or mental health in general. I respect Annie Rogers a lot for her openness and vulnerability, and I look forward to reading her earlier book, A Shining Affliction.

[jo · Rating 3 out of 5]

this books is not perfect -- the writing could be a lot tighter, the stories less scattered, the lacanian theory underlying rogers' therapeutic approach more deeply explained. maybe rogers could have eliminated some stories and spent more time on others, because one does come away from this with a lot of unanswered question.

this said, this is a moving book. the girls are terrific -- scarred and raw and angry and beautiful -- and rogers' own presence in their lives is portrayed (by herself) with sweet vulnerability. therapists have hearts, too.

not sure how much i buy her description of the fine points of the clinical application of lacanian psychoanalysis. after a bit it all gets a little absurd and a little stretched. but it is nice that rogers spends all this time listening to kids everyone else has thrown away, and that she puts them all lovingly on paper.

i think i've learned a few things from this. mostly, to pay attention to the things that people say and to how they point to the things they can't, don't want to, yet desperately need to say.

[update after having read the last two chapters, including "A Note to My Colleagues." These are easily the best two chapters of the whole book. If you don't want to read through the case histories, read these two and chapter 24 and you have a brief digest of lacanian psychoanalysis for dummies (well, as much as lacan can dumbed down).]

[Meg · Rating 5 out of 5]

"Arrest: to be stopped by a law beyond yourself

"Beautiful: to be known through another's experience of your beauty, and to love by knowing their desire

"These are my words for her sounds working on our bodies at the same moment."

[Erica Tjelta · Rating 4 out of 5]

Wow. (That truly is the most succinct review I can offer!)

Do you walk around thinking you more or less say what you actually mean? And that others do the same? Do you think you've finally gotten yourself pretty much figured out? Ha.

Have you ever wanted to be able to better relate to those who have experienced trauma beyond what you can understand? Or maybe to makes sense of the trauma in your own life?

Would you like to have your stereotypes of Freudian psychoanalysis to be shattered? Have you never heard of the related, yet totally different, Lacanian theory of language? Do you think those last two questions couldn't be more boring? Double-ha!

I challenge you to read this. Really. It's mind bending. (Here's the ever important note that the entire book will be a MASSIVE trigger for anyone who has suffered childhood trauma of any kind. Massive.)

According to the last paragraph, I am the one person for whom this book was written:

"If reading this book has kicked up a protest in your mind, and even so you've read this far, and if you've had memorable dreams, and if your body in pieces has begun to speak, and if you are now brimming with words and their sounds--and you're no longer sure of what you're hearing or saying--even then as you disagree with me, you are the one person I've written this for, the one to whom I entrust these words."

[stephanie · Rating 4 out of 5]

i don't know. i read this slowly, trying to understand. she introduces a lacanian theory of psychoanalysis, which focuses on the idea that the unconscious is not what freud though, but rather, the unconscious is through language. and she has this theory that trauma is actually through language (which then makes sense that she picks lacan to lead her through the whole thing, as he's a rather famous deconstructionist).

so mostly, i want to read lacan now, but i don't know what.

i found myself offended at the point when she finishes recounting her main case study, and then says that, "Could Ellen have come to this point in her life through another kind of therapy? I don't know with certainty, but I think not . . . I do not think that Ellen would have found a lasting answer to her trauma, to her family's trauma." (210) it's just . . . i think there are lots of different ways to solve a riddle.

there's also a point where she rails against behavioral therapy, which of course irritated me. the thing is, even if you think that the psychoanalysis is necessary for long-lasting happiness, why do you not treat the symptoms and bring the person up to baseline where the repetition of the trauma and the suicidal impulses are at least reduced, and then deal with the long-term stuff? i don't know. i think it's dangerous to wait too long. but maybe i've been reading too much suicidology lately . . .

it's all together really fascinating, and i am very glad i read it. however, i think i have to think harder and longer about everything it meant, and said, especially the later chapters. especially since i still don't fully understand the author's own joan of arc deal, and how things make sense. i guess i don't believe that much in the unconscious. which is hard. but it's not like ellen chose to be abused by a person named ed . . . though i can definitely see how that would play out into headaches by rogers' theory - it all seems a bit too easy.

[Katie · Rating 3 out of 5]

Rogers does an excellent job of allowing readers into the most intimate and vulnerable relationships in one's life: therapist and client.

Not only does Rogers see the value in spending time after each session with a client, to analyze, process, and make sense of the interactions, but she reminds clinicians of the importance of "listening" and finding meaning within language.

Clients often say more than we think they say, and if we listen close enough, we will be able to hear them.

[Jmlc · Rating 5 out of 5]

OH. SO. GOOD. It's remarkable how we use language and how we tell our stories and what we don't even understand we're revealing when we're talking. But our brains do.... I've re-read it twice and am still thinking about and trying to understand it.

[Paul · Rating 5 out of 5]

The author of this book is brilliant, to start with. The book is a chilling, fascinating, profound explication of Freudian/Lacanian theory and practice. I've never thought much of Freud, ever since I had him over and, when I went to the bathroom, he stole my entire cocaine stash and disappeared.

The idea of Freudian analysis by any psychoanalyst not as brilliant as Freud or the author of this book has troubled me (even though I have never given nor received psychoanalysis). The idea of free association uncovering deep neuroses strikes me as possibly a slick parlor game.

In this book, however, the author cracks one case in particular in which the absence of speech due to trauma (in this case, sexual trauma) is revealed in hidden language that manifests itself as plays on words that are unavailable to the conscious thinking of the patient. The author teases these out and solves the case of a horribly sexually abused girl and what happened to her in her early childhood.

I was impressed with the connections the author made: Ed, the abuser, has associations with "headache," which the author reduces to "Ed ache," which then becomes a revelation to the patient. Similar connections are made to Edna, the schizophrenic aunt, to Helene, the Nazi-raped grandmother, to Helen, the mother, to Ellen, the patient herself. The chain of interpretation may have been more difficult or problematic had the abuser been Raskolnikov and one of the relatives named Dottie, but given their actual names in the story's narrative, the author was brilliant in defining the issues in Ellen's family, which go far beyond Ellen herself and into her mother and even into history.

To me, the most amazing thesis was that a person can carry within her psyche the influence of ancestors and act them out in her life. If that is so, it is a profound discovery about an individual's psyche and the effect of genetics on the behavior of descendents. It's a remarkable idea, and I would love to see it elaborated. It may explain a lot of history.

Parts of this book were beyond my understanding, but I could tell I was in the presence of genius. Rereading the book in a few years may increase my understanding. It's too incredible to be fathomed in one reading.

[Deb · Rating 5 out of 5]

*At a loss for words*


It's probably not a coincidence that it is difficult to put into words what Annie has communicated in her book about the hidden language of trauma. Through her entrancing and lyrical use of language, she somehow magically illustrates how the invisible marks of trauma on the body repeatedly surface through the spoken--and more importantly non-spoken--language. In her work with traumatized children, Annie mirrors back traces of their unconscious she remarkably detects in both their words and silences, and ultimately helps the child to give voice to the haunting "unsayable."

Admittedly, I am still trying to process all that was said in this book. And as I do so, I take comfort in Annie's final words of the book when she said: "..if your body in pieces has begun to speak, and if you are now brimming with words and their sounds--and you're no longer sure of what you're hearing or saying...you are the one person I've written this for, the one to whom I entrust these words."

[Carisa · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is an excellent book for anyone working with children and trauma. Some of the stories are difficult to read, but Annie Rogers is great writer. I highly recommend this book. The content of the stories help one to consider the importance of words and the role of language and how difficult it can be to articulate horrible things (especially for children).

[Marius · Rating 4 out of 5]

A pretty fascinating read about the author's experiences as a psychoanalyst. The book starts off with her experience with psychosis, hospitalization ... And then goes into case studies, where she emphasises how children speak the unspeakable through signifiers (Lacanian term), And signifiers can be words that have a special tendency to repeat in one's language, usually through freudian slips, accents, or through behaviour, fantasies, dreams, symbolls. Most of the time they are unconscious, visible but not to the person who is doing it. And this is the unconscious trying to be heard, because the nature of what needs to be heard is usually horrific, painful these contents are being repressed from conscious awareness.
If you want to see some Lacanian concepts at work, and analysis from someone with a very good grasp of this type of therapy, I think you will enjoy the book.

[Mya · Rating 3 out of 5]

There is no question that Rogers is a fantastic writer. Her use of language is incredible, and her ability to describe her own processes is fascinating. It also does a good job of communicating her patients to the reader in a way that really displays their candor.

I have, however, been building up to a "but," and it is this: she gives far too much credit to Lacan and this search for the "unsayable." Towards the end of the book, I feel like the only thing she allows to come through in her writing and her connection with Ellen is this desire to find hidden messages. It's very unique and certainly seems to be effective, but I struggled to really grasp how and why Rogers kept focus on that and pretty much that alone.

"What is considered unconscious by many therapists is simply what is not in awareness at any given time. Insight into what is not in awareness also isn't psycho-analysis. Psychoanalysis offers something that is, in my experience, different and distinctive. ...I've come to believe that to listen to anything less than the logic and language of the unconscious is, in effect, to put a lid on what is emerging and to silence the unconscious." (201-202)

What makes this important? Rogers concludes that in the case of Ellen, "[analysis of the unconscious] builds toward and understanding of what was at stake in Ellen's life" (209). This understanding, it is explained, would not have been created had it not been for the use of Lacanian theories, and therefore Ellen would not have gotten to where she currently is in life. I'm skeptical. The "lasting answer" she says Ellen was able to receive from her therapy is difficult to connect directly to the unsayable parts of her analysis, and yet I see how it may have helped Rogers understand the Ellen that needed help.

In her previous book, and as a much younger and inexperienced therapist, Rogers was very much interested in going with the flow, with figuring out what worked and sometimes not even knowing what worked. Her self discovery as a therapist offered a lot of interesting morsels in her writing that have all but disappeared here as she details almost solely her search for the unnamed. Perhaps this made her a more effective therapist, but I don't feel it made for an effective approach to writing this book.

A lovely read, but be prepared to be a little confused and lost in the strange world of psychoanalysis...

[Isabella Souto Maior · Rating 5 out of 5]

"Trauma follows a different logic, a condensed psychological logic that is associative, layered, nonlinear and highly metaphoric. Trauma is a letter written on the body in vanishing ink, a character of the alfabet that seems to stand alone as it emerges into view. As one letter collects other letters, a message emerges that demands to be read, to be known."

Que livro denso e maravilhoso. A beleza do inconsciente estruturado como uma linguagem (tal qual pontua Lacan) emerge a cada construção de caso clínico. O trabalho de Rogers com crianças é inspirador e norteia uma prática humana, atenta, que faz uso das dimensões simbólicas, reais e imaginárias com uma habilidade admirável. O paradoxo da análise se torna muito claro para mim: o não-dito só pode ser ouvido através daquilo que é dito pelo sujeito. E ai entra o trabalho do analista: fazer o atravessamento de uma fala que escapa a lógica linear. O analista permite que o sujeito una seus fragmentos (i)lógicos do discurso, permitindo que estes construam que pode ser dito. Desvendando os códigos de linguagem (e de trauma) que o próprio sujeito traz em seu corpo sem que o Eu saiba disso. The unsayable - mas que de alguma forma é dito.

[Ryan · Rating 5 out of 5]

I read this book several years ago when I first started back at school. I enjoyed it then, but decided now, almost 5 years later, to pick it back up and see what more I might get out of it.

Quite a lot, it seems. Based on the Lacanian theory of how our unconscious manifests itself in the things we DON'T say, the metaphors we use, and the way certain words we use sound like other things that our conscious mind won't let us say, Rogers uses this information in her work with sexually abused children to help them express things for which they have no way to construct a narrative.

After two years of working with traumatized (and abusive) children myself (though not as a therapist), I certainly identified with the book and Rogers's writing a lot more this time around. This Lacan business is still way over my head, but it's interesting. Maybe it will change the way I think about what I say, or how I say things, in an attempt to interpret my own unconscious expression. But probably not.

Rogers, however, is a psychotic genius.

[Sara · Rating 4 out of 5]

it was... hard to read. not... intellectually hard to read. emotionally hard to read. I had to put it down a couple of times 'cause... i don't know; it was stirring something in me and it was too much to handle, but... but it was good. I mean, personally, I think she's reading a little too much into those repetitious words and sounds. I think she's making connections that no one else would ever think twice about. I understand it, to a certain extent. I even agree with it, to a certain extent. But... I definitely think she's sometimes seeing things that really aren't there. (and no kind of sick pun intended, as the author does see/hear voices that really aren't there at times...) Also, I'd recommend reading her first book, A Shining Affliction, before this one-- The Unsayable will make more sense after A Shining Affliction!

[Melody · Rating 3 out of 5]

Um. Yeah. Well, I couldn't say. No, REALLY, I couldn't say. Which is probably why I was drawn to this book. Reading it was a roller-coaster ride. There were passages so vertiginous that I thought I'd throw up and then the author would go haring off on a psychotic break of her own, or some impenetrable Freudian passage and I'd roll my eyes like one of the teenagers featured herein. There were passages where I couldn't even breathe, it was like they were written about me, or about that little girl I was.

But mostly, this book made me doubt the stories I have told myself, made me understand that the things I do not, will not, cannot say nevertheless are spoken through my actions, through my life. And it made me very, very sad. I would like to say I walked away from this book full of hope. But I did not.

[Natalie Steinberg · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book has a slow beginning and a slow, tiresome ending, but the middle portion (and the vast majority of it) is incredibly interesting. There were points in this book where I struggled to put it down, but other points where I felt I could skip whole pages and not really miss anything. Much of the beginning spoke of the author's own psychotic episodes, and (as I suppose it probably should have been), were somewhat confusing to me. There is also a significant amount of religious references and occurrences that I don't quite understand, probably because I'm not Catholic. Overall the stories were touching, heartbreaking, and ultimately the glue that holds this very intriguing book together.

[Laura · Rating 3 out of 5]

This was a very interested collection of case studies. It reads very much like most of Freud's collections of case studies. Some of the stories were interesting, but I didn't really feel like I learned anything new in this. She basically took Freud and Lacan and applied it to her specific cases, but didn't really offer anything new to the discussion. It was easy to read, but at times unnecessarily repetitive.

[Red · Rating 5 out of 5]

this book was more theory-heavy than A Shining Affliction, and to some extent I missed the lovely lilt and roll of her narrative style; but the depth and nuance of the theory was spectacular. I understand more about Lacanian analysis after reading this book than I did after taking half a semester's class on it. Dr. Rogers is a beautiful writer, a precise and elegant thinker, and takes a deeply kind and respectful approach to her clients. I want to throw myself at her feet and study from her.

[Alissa · Rating 1 out of 5]

Extremely disappointing. The writer's main case study was of her performing Lacanian analysis on a teen -- and she wasn't even trained as a Lacanian analyst. Unethical. As a licensed mental health professional conducting evidenced based practice on children and teens who were sexually abused -- I thought it was atrocious that she kept this teen in treatment for 7 years. Such an antiquated understanding of severe sexual trauma. It was tough to read the whole book.

[Sarah · Rating 4 out of 5]

I haven't read anything like this in quite a while. I liked that her approach is so different from others I've been reading recently, though some of the Lacanian theory was a bit much for me. I kept up a healthy argument with her in my head as I read, but found that some of her ideas have been making me look at the world somewhat differently.

[Susan · Rating 5 out of 5]

Not just about trauma. The book is about language & music & Lacan. Audiences, witnesses, silence & sound. Made me think about Facebook, for example, and what it means to speak to the missing there. "It is Lacan's idea that when we speak to someone, we're actually hearing ourselves through them."

[Spider the Doof Warrior · Rating 5 out of 5]

I remembered I read this book. I should probably read it again as trauma and how it effects the mind is something I'm interested in. Even stuff you don't remember can shape you. This therapist was trying to listen to her patients and find ways to help them. She also had went through similar trauma too.

[N. Likes · Rating 5 out of 5]

Annie Rogers is a compelling, fluid writer. With this book, part confessional, part memoir, part how-to manual, she provides tremendous insight into how to understand the speech - and the silences - of traumatized people.

Anyone who loves, or cares for, anyone who has suffered childhood trauma, should read this book.

[Faith · Rating 3 out of 5]

Rogers is a Lacanian psychologist who bases her work on the assumption that when something is unsayable, the traumatized, through repetitions and other word use, will betray or tell the story he or she can not speak. Centered on work with young girls and inclusive of Rogers’ own history of trauma and breakdown.

[Cassidy · Rating 3 out of 5]

Intriguing. Well-written. But definitely a mixed bag, in my personal opinion. Some lines were sharply lovely and real, but there was a lot of excessively Freudian and narrowly analytical material that left a sour taste in my mouth, per se. I'm glad I read it, but I'm not over the moon about the message.

[Abbie Meyer · Rating 4 out of 5]

If you are looking for a quick psychology read don't bother with this book! Sometimes requires going back to re read stories and then understand how she applies Lacan's theory. I agree with others that have stated her storyline is somewhat scattered. Rogers has convinced me to reconsider the unconscious when practicing. Very thought provoking book!

[Donovan Lessard · Rating 4 out of 5]

The best, most accessible interpretation of Lacan I've ever read. Highly recommended for social scientists who are getting in Lacanian theory. The writing is quite good, the stories are touching, and it's a relatively quick read.

[Sophie Snider · Rating 4 out of 5]

I learned so much! In a way that I think I will actually bring into the room with me as a therapist. This is also a great way to get a lil intro to Lacan (re: everyone saying that his theory is basically impossible to read lol)

[Jessica · Rating 3 out of 5]

(3.5???)

[from my post about it because I'm too lazy to write something else/more, but truly, bless the last paragraph of this book]

Finished Annie Rogers' second book, v. different from the first. It's given me so many valuable things (helped me think more about: that thing we call "the unconscious" & our disavowal of/inattention to it; language & SOUNDS & "Making Sense"; etc.), but also, there is so much I do not like!! So much of it seems so certain of itself -- a travesty tbh. She fit all her knowing into a Lacanian framework -- so singular & sure, (a) premade (language) -- & I dislike it so much, ugh. I cried like only twice while reading it, & despite all of these qualms, this last page (last image here) had me weeping, as if the whole book was worth it, & perhaps it was. I think she misses something, & yet, we are both Here, fumbling around in the dark, reaching out for something concerned with language & epistemology & relationality & ecology & how these are all connected & limit what can('t) be said & known, & how.

*

"If a child is suffering, in that quiet invisible way children really do suffer, I am drawn to find that child and make contact. Maybe I am going back to myself as a child, as an animal will seek its own kind snared in a trap. I simply won't be turned away. I watch for the smallest sign of communication, and respond with a small sign, too, and then I wait for the next sign, hoping I can read it when it comes."

*

"Listening to her was like sitting under a huge sky with stars and hearing every one of them calling out with something to say. The sense of closeness and distance was enormous. Even as I was drawn to hear the details, to know the exact names for things, to feel the rhythm of her telling in electric recognition, I wanted to flee. Yet I'd made room for this story--all year inventing activities through which I hoped such stories could emerge."

*

"If reading this book has kicked up a protest in your mind, and even so you've read this far, and if you've had memorable dreams, and if your body in pieces has begun to speak, and if you are now brimming with words and their sounds--and you're no longer sure of what you're hearing or saying--even then, as you disagree with me, you are the one person I've written this for, the one to whom I entrust these words." [!!!]