Straying: A Novel

by Molly McCloskey

“A memoir-vivid portrait of a vertiginous affair” (Vogue) for readers of Jenny Offill, Garth Greenwell, and Anne Enright, an unforgettable novel about a young American expat who settles in Ireland, marries, and lives through the consequences of an affair—by “an extravagantly gifted writer” (Rachel Cusk).In this “humane and lucid novel” (The New York Times), Alice, a young American, arrives in the West of Ireland with no plans and no strong attachments. She meets and falls in love with an Irishman, quickly marries him, and settles down in a place whose customs are unfamiliar. And then, in the course of a single hot summer, she embarks on an affair that breaks her marriage and sets her life on a new course. Years later, in the immediate aftermath of her beloved mother’s death, Alice, having worked in war zones around the world, finds herself back in Ireland, contemplating the forces that led her to put down roots and then tear them up again. What drew her to her husband, and what pulled her away? Was her husband strangely complicit in the affair? Was she always under surveillance by friends and neighbors who knew more than they let on? “Short, intense, and emotionally precise” (Star Tribune, Minneapolis), Straying is at once a “ferociously well written” (The Guardian) account of passion and ambivalence and an exquisite rumination on the things that matter most.

Genres: Fiction, Novels, Ireland, Audiobook, Contemporary, Marriage

225 pages, Kindle Edition

First published February 20, 2018

Reviews

[Angela M · Rating 3 out of 5]

2.5 stars, generously rounded up because of the writing, the quiet, introspective style which almost always appeals to me. From the beginning I wasn’t sure how I felt about the characters and their lack of emotion and that contributed in large part to my not feeling any connection to them. But there were these things that I liked about it - the writing and the introspective quiet feel, the descriptions of the places . I thought this might have been a love story - a marriage, an affair, a broken marriage and the ending of an affair, but these were all without any passion that I could sense. It was more about a woman who didn’t seem to have a handle on her life, and making spur of the moment decisions, trying to convince herself of their validity.

Alice , an America woman goes to Ireland on vacation meets a man, marries him , has an affair (not a spoiler - this is told in the first pages and the book description .) Years later after working as a writer in Somalia, Kosovo among other trouble spots in the world, she returns to Ireland and tells the story of her past . I just didn’t find it captivating, actually I was bored at times. I was disappointed and not at all sure if there’s anything memorable here . A disappointing read in spite of the writing . No emotion, no passion , no depth of feeling was conveyed in either of the relationships and perhaps there just wasn’t any. This was not a long book so I continued because the writing was good, more so in the beginning and because it was a monthly buddy read with Diane and Esil . I may have put it aside otherwise.


I received an advanced copy of this book from Scribner through Edelweiss.

[Diane S ☔ · Rating 3 out of 5]

2.5 Although this is a book of fantastic prose, elegant writing, I just never connected with this story.A very introspected read as Alice, our narrator is telling her story from the present, looking back on the decisions she made in the past. The most interesting part of this story was the aid work she did in Kenya and other countries.

Leaving Oregon she comes to Ireland and meets her husband in Sligo. The locations were interesting, the story not so much. Alice in trying to come to terms with the present and the decisions. Alice and I never clicked, I found her self involved, rather selfish and found myself skimming, something that never bodes well!. I did enjoy the character who played her mother, wish the story would have been more about her, but alas she was not the focus, though I believe she was the heart.

Esil, Angela's and my buddy read for February. The discussion and the fact that we all agreed on our opinions of this book, as well as the stellar writing, kept me reading.

[Esil · Rating 3 out of 5]

I have loved many books that portray unlikeable protagonists, but I just couldn’t get past my feelings towards Alice in Straying. Alice is American and moves to Ireland in her early 20s. She marries Eddie. And then for no particular reason, she starts an affair with Cauley. Later in life, she returns to Ireland and reflects on what happened with Eddie and Cauley. My aversion to Alice is not motivated by a sense of offense at the fact she had an affair — I’m perfectly happy to read good fiction about pretty much anything. But there’s a coldness and a flatness to Alice that didn’t really ring right and that left me feeling indifferent. The story is written from the first person, and yet Alice describes her own actions as though she is an outside observer. It’s very distancing and ultimately not engaging. Why even three stars? McCloskey really knows how to use language, and there’s no question this is well written. I just wish I had enjoyed the characters and story more.

This was a monthly read with my reading buddies Angela and Diane, which as always made this a better experience despite my frustration with the book. And thanks to Netgalley and the publisher for an opportunity to read an advance copy.

[TL *Humaning the Best She Can* · Rating 4 out of 5]

I received this via Goodreads Giveaways in exchange for an honest review. All my opinions are my own:).
----
*Initially I entered the giveaway because the author was Irish and I'm a sucker for that part of my heritage *sheepish* but also because the summary intrigued me. I wondered how everything would be handled too, considering*
3.5 stars

Beautiful atmospheric writing with characters that felt real (even if you didn't like what they did) and a dream at the same time and a plot that, for me, went back and forth between interesting and so-so.

This book is a slow burn, it take its time to set the stage and let you get to know everyone and everything. It almost reads like a journal Alice is writing in, reflecting on her life and how she got to where is and how all that affected her life before and after.
(Bad grammar probably but too tired to care)

There is an air of nostalgia and haziness for some of the book. It seems more clear-headed at the end, when Alice is leaving the house she is staying in for a new place . She talks about everything with a detached sort of air, making it hard to connect at times with what was going on.

But it also makes sense the way the story is being told to us.

Alice doesn't expect us to sympathize with her in my opinion, she just wanted to get her story out there for herself, and maybe for her mother since she never came clean about the affair. Just my theory.

There's no major tension or conflict, even with the affair going on. Right away in the beginning, the stage is set and we're just along for the ride to see how everything pans out.

It ends on a hopeful note, Alice feeling good about the future it seems and I got the sense of her closing the page (mentally and physically) on this part of her life.

Won't be for everyone, but overall a good read.

[Kristy]

I'm always looking for a new book that's slightly outside my comfort zone of fast-paced, adventurous reads. Sadly, Straying did not fit the bill. It was just a little too slow for me, with a little too much of nothing happening. I've seen a few reviews call it introspective and I think that is the perfect description for this book. Although I could not finish it, if slow, reflective books are your thing, then I would recommend this.

[Alison Hardtmann · Rating 4 out of 5]

Molly McCloskey is an American who spent decades living in Ireland. Here she tells the story of an American woman who travels to Ireland and ends up staying. Alice gets a temporary job tending bar in Sligo, a large town on the west coast, and ends up marrying a local and staying. The novel goes back and forth through Alice's adult life, from her experiences as a young woman exploring a new place, to her marriage and it's demise, and her life afterward working for an NGO and traveling to various places in distress. The story itself is introspective; Alice imploded her own marriage with an affair, an affair where she grew increasingly reckless, as though she wanted to get caught.

This is a lovely, small novel about a woman looking inward for the first time in middle age. This isn't a book primarily about her infidelity (the original, European title is When Light Is Like Water), but a look back at an entire life, of which the adultery formed a part and that Alice looked back on as a part of her life she struggles to understand. Far more interesting were the snippets about her work for the Irish NGO, which sent her to places like Sri Lanka and Kosovo and Kenya.

This is a slender novel that packs a lot into it. I'm torn between thinking it was too short and lacked amplifying detail and thinking that it was wise of the author to leave more out than she put it. McCloskey is a skilled writer, with an observant eye and I look forward to reading more from her.

[Karen · Rating 3 out of 5]

Barely 3 stars. Sometimes beautiful, quiet, introspective, descriptive language just isn’t enough for me. The main characters show a lack of emotion and that me to have zero connection with any of them. Alice, the protagonist, didn’t seem to have any direction in life -sort of ricochets from one event/decision to the next. The power of her mother’s memories seem to be the most powerful and meaningful; at least they were for me.

[Andrea · Rating 4 out of 5]

4.5
This book is a testament to the beauty of language
Powerfully descriptive

[Donna Davis · Rating 5 out of 5]

This title is the first fictional work McCloskey has published in the US, but surely it cannot be the last. This addictive novel came to me free and early, courtesy of Scribner and Net Galley in exchange for this honest review. It becomes available to the public February 20, 2018.

Alice has returned to Ireland. As a young woman of 24, she had gone there intending to visit, gain some perspective about what to do with her life, and then return to Portland, Oregon, but instead she met Eddie and married. “I was not sure how grown-up love was supposed to feel.” Now she is more mature and single again; she returns to Ireland and in a deeply intimate, gently philosophical narrative, tells us about what happened, and about the affair with Cauley that was instrumental in ending her marriage.

Here I must confess that I have old-fashioned ideas about cheating on a spouse. If your marriage is solid, you should respect it and be faithful. If your marriage is dying, get out before you start something new; don’t sneak around and tell lies. If your marriage is troubled and you aren’t sure what you want, address that first, but don’t poison the well with a fling. It’s unethical and unfair. Have some integrity, for goodness sake.

And so, why am I reading this novel, and more to the point, why am I loving it? It goes to show that a strong writer can make me want to read almost anything, whereas an indifferent one may start with a promising scenario that fizzles. McCloskey pulls me in and doesn’t let me go.

The cover art tells the reader right away that despite the title, this is not erotica. Those looking for a novel that will make them breathe hard will have to find something else. Straying gives us something far better, in my view. I feel as if Alice is my dear friend. I usually read several titles at once, drifting from one to another over the course of a day or evening. But Alice interrupts my literary smorgasbord because in a way, I feel disloyal for reading anything else. The narrative here, told in the first person, is so deeply personal that it’s as if she is sitting across from me at a coffee shop (or since we’re in Ireland, in a pub perhaps), and she’s spilling the beans, confessing everything that she did, and the consequences that followed. She isn’t beating herself up Anna Karenina-style, nor is she proud of her mistakes; rather, she is explaining what happened, what she’s learned from it, and what she still wonders about. It's not prose you can walk away from until it’s over.

Those that love excellent fiction should buy this book and read it. If you can get it cheap, do that; if you have to pay full jacket price, do it anyway. You don’t want to miss this one.

[Mary Conway · Rating 4 out of 5]

interesting paired treatment and some gorgeous writing

[Ostap Bender · Rating 4 out of 5]

There is such wisdom in Molly McCloskey’s writing. This is a book about love, marriage, affairs, and aging told from the perspective of a middle-aged woman looking back at her life. Her relationships to her husband, lover, and parents form the biggest part of it, but she also writes about her experiences in NGO work around the world and makes sober assessments about the nature of mankind. She seems to write effortlessly as she blends together emotions, humor, and pathos, and through it all there is great honesty. The sexual aspects of the affair hinted at by the book’s title are very restrained, but all the more erotic because of it, especially when the narrator is so intelligent. Highly recommended.

Quotes:
On aging:
“Now I am old enough to know that there are people I would like to see again whom I have already seen for the last time, there are places I dream of returning to that I will never revisit, and that though a few things do come around again and offer themselves, many more do not.”

On Americans:
“I had seen that what gave rise to the greatest derision was the tendency of Americans to be both credulous and easily impressed.”

On death:
“When I returned to Nairobi after her funeral, I felt my mother everywhere. I was awash in an indiscriminate tenderness I neither expected nor understood. Everything moved me. Everything – from a birdcall, to the green of the grass, to the children playing soccer on the pitch near my home – overwhelmed me with its life. I swung between a lightness of being that bordered on vertigo and a sorrow that made the least movement difficult. In my grief, I felt awakened to the world, and a strange, acute euphoria sometimes stole over me. What I felt, in fact, was perpetually astonished.”

On love and marriage:
“I read once that to commit to love is to commit to love’s diminishment. Which means that commitment is less about optimism than it is about realism – accepting that love is doomed to become less of itself, and proceeding anyway, in the faith that one will be equal to that truth when it arrives.”

On mankind:
“Then Harry says that the difference between nations is the degree to which acts of everyday barbarity are tucked away, conducted out of sight, and that what we call civilization, and what we know as peace, is only the papering over of what we really are: violent, venal, full of fear.”

On men and women:
“Harry keeps eyeing me but doesn’t comment. He is doing that thing men sometimes do. You tell them something big and confusing, something that’s really rocked you, the sort of thing that would make a woman scoot forward on her chair so that the two of you could parse the thing to death, and they say nothing. And you are never sure if they are holding it there, in silence and respect, letting you sort it the way they sort things, or if they are simply at a loss, unable to cross easily from the territory of information to the territory of feeling.”

[Tyler Koch · Rating 3 out of 5]

The writing was lovely and 100% the reason I rated this as highly as I did.

This book is one of the few times that I’ve finished reading and thought, “What was the point of that? Why did the author chose to tell that story?” There are so many interesting aspects: living as an expat in Ireland, working as a field journalist all over the world, struggling with being defined solely as a wife, dealing with the death of a parent, the rampant alcoholism amongst her acquaintances, etc. etc. Yet the thing most focused on is her affair, which is in, my opinion, the least interesting of everything.

The main character is unlikeable, yes. But that’s fine, some people are unlikeable. She looks at everyone (her mom, her husband, her lover, even her cat) with pity. I mean, it literally says she felt pity for basically every character in the book. I did not read this as empathy, however. I read it as condescension. At one point, she feels pity over the fact that her lover neatly hangs all of his work shirts. That’s it. She pities that his life is so shabby (in her eyes), yet he still hangs his shirts. She’s a believable character, but I would not want to be her friend.

The problem is that Alice never grows as a person. Her thought process and actions as a 24 year old are indistinguishable from those as a 40-something year old. Again, that’s fine. People are really like that. But it also part of the reason why I kept thinking “why tell this story?” If she would ‘ve grown and passed some critique on her younger self, I would get it. But she doesn’t.

If I would have read the description of this book before I read the book itself, I wouldn’t have picked it. But I like to go into books blindly and sometimes, like this one, I get burnt by it.

[Kristen · Rating 4 out of 5]

I bought this book while in LA back in August of last year, and I don't know why it took me almost a year to pick up, because I really enjoyed it. I find it interesting to see how modern society views/reacts to cheating (anyone else remember feeling like Tiger Woods was going to be put behind bars when he cheated?!), so this book was particularly interesting in that we know our protagonist cheats on her husband from the beginning of the book. I appreciated that she did not try to justify herself or her actions; we just get an account of what she did, how she felt, etc. The writing was beautiful; although the book is about someone cheating and being discovered, it is not a plot-driven book with a big explosive reveal or confrontation; there was a lot of mundanity, reflections, and descriptions of scenery (which reinforced my desire to visit Ireland one day!), and I found myself underlining a decent amount.

"How do people do it, I used to wonder. Well, I learned. That sort of secret feels like an illness, the way the world slows to a crawl as though for your inspection. So much clarity and consequence--it was like enlightenment, it was like being in the truth, which is a funny thing to say about deceit."

"But we can live easily with many things, and minor inconveniences can seem infinitely interesting, if we are young or there is novelty or if we are in love."

"to commit to love is to commit to love's diminishment. Which means that commitment is less about optimism than it is about realism--accepting that love is doomed to become less of itself, and proceeding anyway, in the faith that one will be equal to that truth when it arrives."

[Liz · Rating 4 out of 5]

http://cavebookreviews.blogspot.com

Reflecting back on your life doesn't need to wait until you are old and gray and all of the exciting bits of life are behind you. In this novel, a woman in her late thirties thinks about her life, her loves and the work she chose to pursue. Alice is from Oregon and decides, post-college, to move to Ireland as a kind of adventure. She was not running away from anything but rather to a new experience, a different culture with different people. Alice's closest attachment is her mother who raised her on her own. Alice remains close to her mother, and they exchange letters and phone calls frequently. Alice settles into life in Ireland and marries a solid guy called Eddie.

In this self-reflective narrative, Alice describes how one unusually hot summer she drifted into a love affair, and we experience the inner conflict Alice experiences. Her life seems very passive, and yet it is hard to explain away having an extramarital affair as passive behavior. The question seems to be whether she ever truly loved her husband or wanted that short love affair.

After years of working for NGO's in war-torn regions of Africa and eastern Europe, Alice chooses to go back to Ireland, and from there she looks at her life and contemplates her future. Molly McCloskey's prose is inviting as if she is asking the reader to think along with her character, Alice, about how we have lived our lives, treated our loved ones and what we need to do today to embrace the life we have. This is a touching and unique novel, wise words for us all.

Thank you NetGalley and Scribner for the opportunity to read and review this ARC.

[Joy · Rating 3 out of 5]

Very mixed feelings about this one. I agree with all the reviews that said that it’s hard to empathize much with the main character. She comes across as a bit numb/unthinking, and it’s hard to know what to do with that. She has an affair, which is a part of why her marriage dissolves—and she relays it all in a very “numb” way. It’s hard to grasp why she had the affair or if she even cares lots about it. In addition, I listened to this on audio, and the narrator was about as non-emotive and flat as could be, which didn’t help anything. (It made me wonder who on earth selects narrators for audio books, and how they picked this one in particular.)

That being said, the main character has some interesting and useful reflections about the experience of going through a divorce, so I was glad to be able to read this. It’s not a bad read—it’s just odd, since it’s hard to relate to the person who is sharing the thoughts.

Lastly: I read this in preparation for a trip to Ireland, but I found that the book has very little to do with location, even though the author moved from the US to Ireland for this marriage. So this isn’t an obvious choice for learning more about Ireland.

[Rosemary · Rating 5 out of 5]

After reading the author’s recent story in the New Yorker(My Father’s Court) I wanted to read more of her writing. She writes beautiful sentences and is a thoughtful writer with expressive words that just make me want to read more and more. In this little book, she writes of a young woman who moves to Ireland, meets a man and gets married…and slowly falls into an adulterous affair almost as though she is watching herself fall into an abyss of wretchedness. She travels the world, but always comes back to tell the story of her mom, her mom’s life, love and death, followed by her own grief. Each visit home brings feelings of hope, comfort and possibilities, and being loved and cared for. What a wonderful memory, to remember the feelings of home & comfort. And such a loss when it is gone forever.

[Teresa · Rating 3 out of 5]

****3.5 Stars****
Although this book was slower than most I have read lately I found myself enjoying it more and more the further along I got. Alice is an ex-pat that moves to Ireland, marries young and has an affair that destroys her marriage. The Alice telling the story is an older Alice, one who has worked all over the world with a non profit; one who is back in Ireland, mourning the death of her mother and reflecting on her life.
I found this book to be a slow burn...and I have to say that I really like the idea that you don't have to be dying to reflect upon your life, your choices and how you reacted to these things.
Thanks to Simon & Schuster for the ARC!

[Kathleen Gray · Rating 4 out of 5]

There will be times when you will want to tell Alice to grow up. This slender novel is a woman's reflection, prompted by the death of her mother, on what are basically bad choices. Alice moved to Ireland as a young woman, married Eddie, and then had an affair and left him to roam the world. It's nicely written but how much you like this will depend on how open you are to sympathizing with someone who has had little regard for others but is struggling for redemption. This could have been set anywhere bur McCloskey wisely chose Ireland, a setting she uses to great advantage. Thanks to the publisher for the ARC.

[Caroline Bock · Rating 4 out of 5]

An introspective novel about a young journalist, newly married, an American living outside Dublin, who strays (cheats, commits adultery -however you would like to phrase it) from her husband and doesn't quite ever find herself. Chapters alternate between her past in Ireland, her present working for an unnamed NGO in hard hit areas of the world (these chapters are never fully realized), and scenes with her mother, who raised her as a single parent, and is now near the end of her life. Four stars for the beautifully evocative, often meditative writing-- a short book with big overtones. Recommended to read on a rainy wintry day -- which is what I did!

Caroline

[Lynne Ellen · Rating 1 out of 5]

There are many books I dislike but not many that I will ding with one star. This book was not for me. The main character was completely unlikable. She seemed to act on whatever random thought entered her mind then not examine what she was doing or wonder why things fell apart. But she misses her mom. The main character did plenty of reflecting on sunsets, her kitten, and nonsense, but not on anything important. There was a chance that it would be revealed how incredibly wrong and stupid - or just plain mentally ill - the main character would be but no....she misses her mom.

What a waste of time.

[Mary Alice · Rating 5 out of 5]

Straying was an unexpected treat. I pick up too many current books that feel phony and it’s always the writing that either keeps me going or makes me abandon it. I found this book in a little free library at the beach and only a few pages in, I knew it was a worthy read. I think McCloskey writes beautifully and has a markedly realistic way of writing about complicated human relationships. Her husband, her lover, and her mother were defined by her feelings for them rather than too much by their own character. I enjoyed this focus on her narrator and her own internal struggles. No pat ending, no cheap plot twist - just beautifully written.

[Debra · Rating 3 out of 5]

It's probably more 2.5, but I'm rounding up because the writing is really quite beautiful. Unfortunately, the story sort of plods along without any real direction. I was never sure what I was supposed to take away from the story, what Alice's (or the author's) perspective was on infidelity or love or life or anything. The ending also snuck up on me - I went to turn the page to the next chapter and the book was over. It didn't feel complete, probably because I was waiting for a conclusion or something to round out Alice's rambling recollections.

[Marianne K · Rating 3 out of 5]

Beautifully written, almost poetic at times, introspective look at a very young woman's early life after arriving in Ireland as a lark. Here Alice meets Eddie and decides to stay in the country. I was in awe of the beautiful writing but it could not make up for the lack of substance. Maybe because I am so many years past the angst of the 20s and 30s that I just could not connect with Alice. At times I wanted to shake her and tell her to stop frittering away her life. I'm sorry to say the writing could not make up for a rather thin story. At the end, I found myself asking, who cares?

[Colleen Maclennan · Rating 2 out of 5]

This book was dull. Basically the story of an American girl who comes to Ireland, does the pub scene, marries someone I really do not think she really loved, corresponds with her mom back home, has an affair with some random friend of a friend, terminates her marriage and works aboard doing journalism. Lots of deep thinking and reflection on her part throughout the book but basically a sad commentary on the life of the life of Alice , the main character.

[Mari · Rating 3 out of 5]

Alice tells her story about marriage, her life traveling and then her affair that breaks her marriage. It's interesting how she relates this to other parts of life. She realizes she's made mistakes and how they affect the rest of her life and others. She reflects on her parents lives, deaths, how they interacted. Her husband, Eddie, seemed like a great husband. Very tolerant until he wasn't. He had enough. Now she has to make it on her own.

[Donni · Rating 3 out of 5]

American Alice travels to Ireland to start anew. She meets, falls in love with, and marries a good hearted, down to Earth Irishman. They have a good life, and a happy marriage. So she has an affair. Not a one night stand, but a long affair. While the book is beautifully written, and the plot is believable and not predictable, I couldn't love the book. Alice is unsympathetic to me. None of the characters seem passionate about anything. Maybe that's the point?

[Melissa T · Rating 2 out of 5]

This meanders along with no real purpose. I felt nothing for the characters, or what was happening to them. It's more of a story of regret with the MC's aging mother than of the actual affair.

The only thing that saved this from a one star review for me is that the writing is decent.

Other than that, I felt absolulely nothing for the characters or the story as a whole.

This book will be going back to the Little Free Library I got it from ASAP.

[Marybeth · Rating 2 out of 5]

This book was very slow and often depressing to me so it was hard for me to keep reading. Having said that I did like it a little bit more as I got into it further but still had a hard time with it. I hate giving less than 3 star reviews but I really just didn't like this one very much.

I received an ARC of this book from Netgalley in exchange for my honest review.

[Dina · Rating 5 out of 5]

This beautifully written book about a young woman's straying into adultery amidst the death of her mother, may be the best book I have read in the past year.. I have not taken the time to write down quotations in ages, but by the end of this book I had a stack of index cards. McCLoskey is truly one of the most talented contemporary writers i have read in years.

[Maya Lang · Rating 3 out of 5]

Moments of beauty and insight, to be sure, but this lacked the heady brilliance a quiet novel needs to make the lulls in action rewarding. This was trying for Rachel Cusk territory, but wasn't as gorgeous or urgent. It didn't have that "holy shit" level of revelation and was sort of like an inferior, cut version of a good drug.