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Hold the line: Crash course
After a life full of conflict Daniel is chosen to move onto Valhalla to fight for the betterment of the human race. Unbeknownst to him he has been dropped into a whole new galaxy where gods, and demigods compete in a bloodthirsty arena for dominant control of the universe. Daniel pushes his way through with the information he is given, doing what he does best; surviving.
- GenresLitrpg
349 pages, Kindle Edition
Published September 9, 2017
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Displaying 1 - 7 of 7 reviews
September 27, 2017
Need editing desperately
The premise is okay, and I like those kind of lit novel stories. However, the grammer and spelling issues are a deal breaker for me. It would be okay on a website like royal road but if I am expected to pay money for this I expect the start of every sentence to have capitalization and spelling mistakes like "Pressibility" should not reoccur. If english is not your first language I would advise finding a professional editor. Aside from that it also has several newbie mistakes like info dumping and run on sentences. Also it feels like the author has written in some wish fulfillment... in short wait for a version 2
The premise is okay, and I like those kind of lit novel stories. However, the grammer and spelling issues are a deal breaker for me. It would be okay on a website like royal road but if I am expected to pay money for this I expect the start of every sentence to have capitalization and spelling mistakes like "Pressibility" should not reoccur. If english is not your first language I would advise finding a professional editor. Aside from that it also has several newbie mistakes like info dumping and run on sentences. Also it feels like the author has written in some wish fulfillment... in short wait for a version 2
September 17, 2017
Good story, but needs editing
The author has written a good story, with a solid premise and engaging characters. I'm looking forward to the next book in the series.
That said, the writing needs significant editing. There are numerous spelling, grammar and punctuation errors throughout the book.
Overall, this reads like the first draft of a very good book.
The author has written a good story, with a solid premise and engaging characters. I'm looking forward to the next book in the series.
That said, the writing needs significant editing. There are numerous spelling, grammar and punctuation errors throughout the book.
Overall, this reads like the first draft of a very good book.
September 17, 2017
Kept me going all the way to the end
The book had me hooked and immersed all the way to the end. I like this different take on the genre of LITRPG and I am looking forward to the next book in the series.
The book had me hooked and immersed all the way to the end. I like this different take on the genre of LITRPG and I am looking forward to the next book in the series.
November 27, 2017
Edit!!!
Doesn't matter how good your story might be, if you can't even clean it a little I won't give a four or five star review.
In the condition that this story is in, I can only recommend you read it if you can find a free copy or have kindle unlimited.
Doesn't matter how good your story might be, if you can't even clean it a little I won't give a four or five star review.
In the condition that this story is in, I can only recommend you read it if you can find a free copy or have kindle unlimited.
September 14, 2017
Great goram book
I would read the next five books without going to sleep.
One thing that made me mad,was some blank pages,not the tables,
Great book I highly recommend it to you.
I would read the next five books without going to sleep.
One thing that made me mad,was some blank pages,not the tables,
Great book I highly recommend it to you.
September 20, 2017
Great story
Suffers from some grammar issues and is a bit heavy on the military slang with no explanation. But the story itself is good enough to make you forget it.
Suffers from some grammar issues and is a bit heavy on the military slang with no explanation. But the story itself is good enough to make you forget it.
September 27, 2017
Crazy fun
Not as excited by the action as I expected to be, since I couldn't follow a lot of the detail. The plot was a little confusing but no more than any other RPG. Talks about space forces somewhat but doesn't glorify them which is a big plus.
Editing for grammar, spelling and sentence fragments was non-existent which threw off my concentration for following the story.
OK, but confusing.
Not as excited by the action as I expected to be, since I couldn't follow a lot of the detail. The plot was a little confusing but no more than any other RPG. Talks about space forces somewhat but doesn't glorify them which is a big plus.
Editing for grammar, spelling and sentence fragments was non-existent which threw off my concentration for following the story.
OK, but confusing.
Displaying 1 - 7 of 7 reviews