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336 pages, Hardcover
First published January 1, 2018
--coming in the door of your home, late, to Juana; exhausted in the dim light, framed in dark; sitting down together and nodding off in your chair while she clears half-eaten morsels from around you; knowing you in rare moments; stay, rest, let me look at you; but he is ever self-effacing and immersed in his work and there is always--Sackville applies this same technique to bring to life a lost painting whose existence is only known through an inventory list, where it's titled 'Pelican with a Bucket and Donkeys'.--always work to be done, always more to be done--
...How many donkeys? Perhaps the pelican with her beak buried in elegant fine-drawn feathers, soft and blood-stained breast; and the donkeys with their scruffy scumbled thick fur; looking on? Protective? Bothering her? Braying? Totally oblivious? The bucket - almost existing - I can almost see it, this solid object, how he'd do it, the handle, the dented rim and dull gleam, copper -- or then again tin--or perhaps wooden even--the donkeys feeding from it or the pelican pouring her blood into it; no, no way of knowing, hopeless. This piece of frivolity or study from nature or high moral fable of the sort he's not normally given to making so maybe not that, this too hangs somewhere in the palace and is lost or burnt or stolen later, even the circumstances of its vanishing now obliterate and the donkeys wandered off into the wilderness of forgotten. I so much wish I could see it, and know why you made it, and what it meant; if it would offer some glimpse of you as I try to catch you in passing, find you in a catchlight or the placement of a mark--