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Never Mind the Vampires, Here's Transylvania
After twenty years of living in cities around the world, British writer Mike Ormsby settles in a tiny village in Romania’s fabled Transylvania, where the air is clean, the scenery spectacular, and solitude a balm for the soul. But Mike and his wife Angela discover that their learning curve is as steep as a Carpathian slope. Following his critically acclaimed 2008 debut 'Never Mind the Balkans, Here's Romania’, Mike returns with his inimitable wit and sense of wonder. Join him in Transylvania. And never mind the vampires.
- GenresRomaniaNonfiction
252 pages, Paperback
Published September 21, 2017
16 people are currently reading
47 people want to read
About the author
Mike Ormsby
13 books23 followersMike is a British writer based in Transylvania, where he has lived for five hundred years.
He is the author of:
'Never Mind the Vampires, Here's Transylvania' (2017)
'Palincashire, Tales of Transylvania' (2017)
'Child Witch London' (2014)
'Child Witch Kinshasa' (2013)
'Spinner the Winner' (2012);
'Never Mind the Balkans, Here's Romania' (2008)
See also:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Never_Mi....)
Three of Mike's stories were published in 'Bucharest Tales' (New Europe Writers, 2010).
Mike is the editor of 'Loving An Alien' (Nicoaro Books, 2016).
Screenplays:
'Hey Mr DJ!' (2007, filmed in Kigali)
'Enfants dits Sorciers' (2002, filmed in Kinshasa)
'In Her Own Image' (2000)
If you buy one of Mike's books and do not like it, he will accept a refund.
He is the author of:
'Never Mind the Vampires, Here's Transylvania' (2017)
'Palincashire, Tales of Transylvania' (2017)
'Child Witch London' (2014)
'Child Witch Kinshasa' (2013)
'Spinner the Winner' (2012);
'Never Mind the Balkans, Here's Romania' (2008)
See also:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Never_Mi....)
Three of Mike's stories were published in 'Bucharest Tales' (New Europe Writers, 2010).
Mike is the editor of 'Loving An Alien' (Nicoaro Books, 2016).
Screenplays:
'Hey Mr DJ!' (2007, filmed in Kigali)
'Enfants dits Sorciers' (2002, filmed in Kinshasa)
'In Her Own Image' (2000)
If you buy one of Mike's books and do not like it, he will accept a refund.
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Displaying 1 - 18 of 18 reviews
September 21, 2017
NO VAMPIRES WERE HARMED IN THE WRITING OF THIS BOOK. THERE WEREN'T ANY IN TRANSYLVANIA. READ TO BELIEVE!
It's always interesting to read what "the other" has to say about you or, conversely, how you become "the other", even more so when the scrutinizing foreign eye is completed with wit and a penchant for turning unpleasant aspects under his gaze into a laughing matter. After a "Never Mind the Balkans... Here's Romania" that has given the Romanians a humorous mirror to see their good, not-so-good, bad and really bad habits, British journalist relocated to Romania Mike Ormsby continues his saga made up of very short sketches, this time in Transylvania (that's still in Romania, in case you wonder). The world-famous vampire is obviously missing, as any decent Englishman, from Prince Charles to Mike Ormsby, may easily notice. Transylvania is nevertheless full of picturesque figures, more interesting than the one created by the figment of Bram Stoker's imagination, and M.O. turns them into literary characters with the keen eye of a journalist.
An easy, pleasant reading, bittersweet at times, "Never Mind the Vampires, Here's Transylvania" (the Sex Pistols reference remains irresistible, apparently, Sid Vicious says hi) is recommendable for the Romanian readership interested in seeing how aspects which they consider normal may be bewildering to others, but also for those who equate Romania with Dracula and/or Ceausescu, who might learn a thing or two from Ormsby's ‘course’ in avoiding the pitfalls of stereotyping.
Advance Review Copy courtesy of the publisher
It's always interesting to read what "the other" has to say about you or, conversely, how you become "the other", even more so when the scrutinizing foreign eye is completed with wit and a penchant for turning unpleasant aspects under his gaze into a laughing matter. After a "Never Mind the Balkans... Here's Romania" that has given the Romanians a humorous mirror to see their good, not-so-good, bad and really bad habits, British journalist relocated to Romania Mike Ormsby continues his saga made up of very short sketches, this time in Transylvania (that's still in Romania, in case you wonder). The world-famous vampire is obviously missing, as any decent Englishman, from Prince Charles to Mike Ormsby, may easily notice. Transylvania is nevertheless full of picturesque figures, more interesting than the one created by the figment of Bram Stoker's imagination, and M.O. turns them into literary characters with the keen eye of a journalist.
An easy, pleasant reading, bittersweet at times, "Never Mind the Vampires, Here's Transylvania" (the Sex Pistols reference remains irresistible, apparently, Sid Vicious says hi) is recommendable for the Romanian readership interested in seeing how aspects which they consider normal may be bewildering to others, but also for those who equate Romania with Dracula and/or Ceausescu, who might learn a thing or two from Ormsby's ‘course’ in avoiding the pitfalls of stereotyping.
Advance Review Copy courtesy of the publisher
September 21, 2017
As a reader, I sometimes had a feeling that I am there, with the author and his family, friends or neighbours. I guess that the reason why the stories moved me so much is that they are incredibly true. Mike presents the reality just as he sees it. Something totally normal for a local inhabitant is not always so obvious for the author – and vice versa. The stories show Romania – and particularly Transilvania – in its true colours, from good and bad sides. I would strongly recommend you to read the books if you are going to visit this part of the world in the future. Or, if you are already there, perhaps you will find yourself in Mike’s shoes?
Advance Review Copy courtesy of the publisher.
Advance Review Copy courtesy of the publisher.
September 21, 2017
Many of us dream of moving to the countryside where the air is clean and the hills are green...but not many of us dare to. Mike did it; his stories are full of Romanian charm and English humor.
September 23, 2017
I discovered Mike’s adventures when my girlfriend got “Never Mind the Balkans, Here’s Romania” and I got hooked to every page. “Never Mind the Vampires, Here’s Transylvania” didn’t disappoint. Each adventure, each view and of course event which included Romanians described offers a frank view of the magical land of Transylvania. All around I think that you’ll find here a delicious slice of life made possible only through the eyes of someone who was not born in those lands, a slice that will make you think and see your normal and maybe boring every-day life from a total new and refreshing perspective.
I hope that everyone will enjoy it as much as I did!
Advance Review Copy courtesy of the publisher.
I hope that everyone will enjoy it as much as I did!
Advance Review Copy courtesy of the publisher.
October 9, 2017
A great read
Brought back memories of being in Romania back in the 70's as a teenager!
Beautifully written with a combination of meticulous detail regarding everyday life in a rural community and the zany antics of the locals.
Brought back memories of being in Romania back in the 70's as a teenager!
Beautifully written with a combination of meticulous detail regarding everyday life in a rural community and the zany antics of the locals.
August 22, 2021
A witty collection of real short stories from Mike Ormby's life in rural Transylvania. I bought this while road-tripping around Romania this summer, intrigued by the title and the opportunity to experience a journalist's view on a country that I had completely fallen in love with at that point. Ornsby portrays his life in this unknown Transylvanian town with real wit and humour, while not shying away from the rough realities of life. These stories are small snippets of everyday life and his interactions with the locals - from trying to a build a fence, or starting a yoga class. It's not about the historic or political situations of Romania - there is no context of this, or why he himself have come to Romania. It does require that the reader knows a bit about Romania, or maybe it doesn't... I guess you can go into these stories and just experience Transylvania through his eyes. But I would have enjoyed some context. And while I can definitely sense his love for Romania and its people, I can't help but feel that he makes some of the locals into stereotypes - maybe it's a part of his satirical style of writing - but instead of drawing them as fully fleshed people who don't deserve the prejudice that they are often are met with in other parts of Europe -they felt a little incomplete and superficial.
In conclusion, I enjoyed my time while reading it, laughed a lot, and definitely wished to travel back.
In conclusion, I enjoyed my time while reading it, laughed a lot, and definitely wished to travel back.
December 2, 2019
In this sequel to 'Never Mind the Balkans: Heres Romania', Domnul Mike has moved to a mountain village in between the Bucegi and Piatra Craiului mountain ranges - both of which I know well, but I haven't been able to identify the village, which I doubt is called Culmea in reality. Like its predecessor, the book consists of short stories about life in Romania, this time centering in the village Ormsby has moved to. Although the tone remains light, it often contrasts with the events described: a jolly neighbour hanging himself, a dog's ear cut off. But this is the contrast of life in Romanian villages that seem idyllic on the surface to the first-time visitor: they are pretty indeed, but life in the village is complicated. Especially for a Brit, who, despite having lived in Bucharest and having married a Romanian woman, is often bewildered at the challenges the village poses. But he loves it and this book is a testament to that. It also teaches you things, such as why you can build a high fence in Bucharest but not in a mountain village, and that traffic in that same village is not necessarily safer than in bubbly Bucharest. A book that leaves you with a smile and a frown - and the wish to spend some time in one of these villages again as I have, or go there for the first time if you haven't been yet. Because Romania's villages are very lovable, rough edges and all.
December 12, 2020
I really enjoyed reading it. Unlike a lot of other expats who are there to colonize the region and steal its resources through capitalist lies, because they see the people of Romania as potential slaves to the backstabbing bourgeoisie, Mike is the good guy of the region.
He married a Romanian woman and in his village he helps her give English lessons to the local children. Mike takes full part in the village life, fully contributing to the economy of the village. He teaches local children in multiple subjects from singing to playing musical instruments. He gives back so much to the Romanian communities he lives in! He should be treasured as one of the heroes of Romania. His cultural buildup of his village should be commended.
His description of Romania is honest, highlighting key problems in the region. This is a good read to learn about Romania and Transylvania. (To the Romanians who are offended by the word 'Transylvania' you are imperialists who in the 1940s would have sided with Hitler, to kill your fellow Jewish Romanian citizens in order to expand your murderous exploitation of the masses!)
He married a Romanian woman and in his village he helps her give English lessons to the local children. Mike takes full part in the village life, fully contributing to the economy of the village. He teaches local children in multiple subjects from singing to playing musical instruments. He gives back so much to the Romanian communities he lives in! He should be treasured as one of the heroes of Romania. His cultural buildup of his village should be commended.
His description of Romania is honest, highlighting key problems in the region. This is a good read to learn about Romania and Transylvania. (To the Romanians who are offended by the word 'Transylvania' you are imperialists who in the 1940s would have sided with Hitler, to kill your fellow Jewish Romanian citizens in order to expand your murderous exploitation of the masses!)
September 27, 2017
A heartwarming collection of short stories which transport you to the mountains of Transylvania, a place I knew little about till reading this book. As a dog lover I especially enjoyed 'The Lovely Linda' and 'Dog Willing' - two lucky dogs now living The Life of Riley thanks to Mike Ormsby and his wife Angela Nicoara
September 29, 2017
Instead of imaginary bloody fangs, you'll find in Mike Ormsby’s book real smiles whose meanings emerge from the depths of each story.
Marius-Mircea Crisan, author of The Impact of a Myth: Dracula and the Fictional Representation of the Romanian Space (2013), editor of Dracula: An International Perspective (2017).
Marius-Mircea Crisan, author of The Impact of a Myth: Dracula and the Fictional Representation of the Romanian Space (2013), editor of Dracula: An International Perspective (2017).
December 1, 2017
Light reading
An interesting collection of experiences living in a Transylvanian town. Seemingly in chronological order, the chapters could be read almost independently. I very much enjoyed the tales this couple lives through. If you like reading about real life, this will entertain and delight.
An interesting collection of experiences living in a Transylvanian town. Seemingly in chronological order, the chapters could be read almost independently. I very much enjoyed the tales this couple lives through. If you like reading about real life, this will entertain and delight.
August 2, 2018
An interesting book that shows the reality of living in rural Romania in this non-communist era. A collection of short stories about everyday life and the writer's interactions with the "locals." The author uses well placed, simple Romanian phrases throughout the stories. What I didn't like was that I found a couple of the stories lacking definitive endings.
August 7, 2019
Another cracking collection of tales from the acknowledged Shakespeare (aka Caragiale) of Romania - Mike Ormsby. This time they’re all about Transylvania rather than focussed on Bucharest - and particularly the Transylvanians, a motley crew of saints, rogues, drinkers and entrepreneurs - many of them rough diamonds, all of them characters. Ormsby applies his usual wit and verbal dexterity to make you laugh - and sometimes cry, as in the story of Cristina the bear rescuer. Look out also for a hilarious account of an attempted concert in a gorge. All the stories are enjoyable, and the book a winning combination of eminently readable, and insightful about this evidently beautiful part of the world, and its people.
July 1, 2023
This book is a delight. I read it this before heading down to Transylvania and was so glad I did. Little things resonates with me when I was there. I felt like I’d dreamt the place before. Mr Ormsby writes with a simple clear prose that places you in the little vignettes he writes in a visceral manner.
Now I’m home I will read the sequel
Now I’m home I will read the sequel
September 22, 2017
Mike Ormsby's inimitable wit and humour gushes from each and every story, portraying now the other dimension of Romania - the fabulous and fabled Transylvania. An extraordinary reading journey, from laughter to tears and back.
April 23, 2018
An enjoyable, undemanding book filled with light-hearted tales of life in rural Transylvania.
December 6, 2019
Not necessarily an exciting plot, but overall a great depiction of the Transylvanian culture and people. Appreciated the witty and sarcastic remarks throughout the read.
October 19, 2025
Think a gentler Bill Bryson - what does an outsider see as quirky about the people and places he has chosen to live amongst? Ormsby writes well about his lifestyle and neighbours in this rural Transylvanian community. We read it as we embarked on our week of Transylvanian travels, enhancing our pleasure by doing so, and cheering when we spotted it prominently displayed in a bookshop inside one of the heritage fortified churches.
Displaying 1 - 18 of 18 reviews