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Andrew Mayhem #1
Graverobbers Wanted: No Experience Necessary
When you're desperate for money, searching for a little adventure, and aren't the most responsible person in the world, you can end up doing some outrageous things. Which is how Andrew Mayhem, an extremely married father of two, ends up accepting $20,000 to find a key ... a key buried with a body in a shallow grave. When the body turns out to not only be still alive, but armed and dangerous, he realizes that he should have held out for more money. His simple evening of morally questionable manual labor becomes a bizarre game of wits and courage played with an unseen killer with a twisted sense of humor. It's a game that will bring him to a group of filmmakers known as Ghoulish Delights, who are hiding a secret that will test every last bit of Andrew's nerve to discover. And it's impossible to find a babysitter.
188 pages, Paperback
First published August 1, 2000
247 people are currently reading
1557 people want to read
About the author
Jeff Strand
228 books2,210 followersBram Stoker Award-winning author of a bunch of demented books, including PRESSURE, DWELLER, CLOWNS VS. SPIDERS, AUTUMN BLEEDS INTO WINTER, MY PRETTIES, the official novelization of ATTACK OF THE KILLER TOMATOES, and lots of others!
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 186 reviews
September 25, 2011
Writing horror-comedy is tough...
Writing disturbing, gruesome horror-comedy is much, much tougher…
Writing disturbing, gruesome horror-comedy while maintaining a light-hearted touch on the narrative is bordering on metaphysically impossible...
Jeff Strand, for the most part, pulls it off.
Now, this isn't a perfect novel, and there are portions I think could (and should) have been tightened up and made better. I wobbled back and forth between 3 and 4 stars as I was reading and decided to split the baby and go with 3.5 stars, leaving room for improvement in subsequent installments.
One postive sign for the series is that, after finishing this, I was anxious to read the next story, Single White Psychopath Seeks Same. That tells me I enjoyed it more than 3 itty bitty stars would normally indicate. I think the potential for the series which is through the roof given that there are not a whole lot of people doing good, gore-related comedies out there.
...must be a niche audience.
While this is clearly an an early work of Strands, the upside for greatness is definitely lurking within, and I am looking forward to seeing what happens next.
PLOT SUMMARY
Andrew Mayhem is a very married father of two with slackeritis and a serious case of the sarcasms. He’s unmotivated in the extreme when it comes to work and isn’t the most responsible person you’ll ever meet. After failing miserably as a unlicensed private investigator and needing to come up with some quick cash to “settle” with the owner of a car he hit (which the Mrs. is blissfully unaware of), Andrew finds himself willing to make a really dumb decision.
Enter the really dumb decision.
A mysterious and evasive woman hires our everyman to locate and bring her a key. Unfortunately, the key is buried in a shallow grave with the corpse of her recently deceased husband. After initially responding with some “WTF” and “no effing way,” our femme fatale gives Andrew $20,000 reasons to change his mind. He does....and accepts the job.
MISTAAAAAKE........
From there, things get crazy, violent and PSYCHOlarious as Andrew finds himself involved in a messed up bizzaro mystery tied to an organization known as Ghoulish Delights. Hint: get your sick bags ready. I will leave the rest to you, but along the way Andrew will encounter:
**an amoral errand boy named the Apparition,
**a sadistic, game playing serial killer,
**a horrific demonstration of the versatility of the swiss army knife; and
**a pair of cannibal puppets named Gaggles and Boo-Boo
IMPORTANT: remember that Gaggles wears the cowboy hat, Boo-Boo chomps first and it takes 58 bites to kill a woman…don’t forget.
This is fun, funny and seriously fucked up. Andrew is a very likeable guy who you will find yourself rooting for even when he's making one of those OMG decisions that everybody knows he's going to regret. Despite the dark, graphic nature of some of the scenes, the story itself does not take itself too seriously and even the extreme parts are tinged with humor.
3.5 stars. Recommended.
Writing disturbing, gruesome horror-comedy is much, much tougher…
Writing disturbing, gruesome horror-comedy while maintaining a light-hearted touch on the narrative is bordering on metaphysically impossible...
Jeff Strand, for the most part, pulls it off.
Now, this isn't a perfect novel, and there are portions I think could (and should) have been tightened up and made better. I wobbled back and forth between 3 and 4 stars as I was reading and decided to split the baby and go with 3.5 stars, leaving room for improvement in subsequent installments.
One postive sign for the series is that, after finishing this, I was anxious to read the next story, Single White Psychopath Seeks Same. That tells me I enjoyed it more than 3 itty bitty stars would normally indicate. I think the potential for the series which is through the roof given that there are not a whole lot of people doing good, gore-related comedies out there.
...must be a niche audience.
While this is clearly an an early work of Strands, the upside for greatness is definitely lurking within, and I am looking forward to seeing what happens next.
PLOT SUMMARY
Andrew Mayhem is a very married father of two with slackeritis and a serious case of the sarcasms. He’s unmotivated in the extreme when it comes to work and isn’t the most responsible person you’ll ever meet. After failing miserably as a unlicensed private investigator and needing to come up with some quick cash to “settle” with the owner of a car he hit (which the Mrs. is blissfully unaware of), Andrew finds himself willing to make a really dumb decision.
Enter the really dumb decision.
A mysterious and evasive woman hires our everyman to locate and bring her a key. Unfortunately, the key is buried in a shallow grave with the corpse of her recently deceased husband. After initially responding with some “WTF” and “no effing way,” our femme fatale gives Andrew $20,000 reasons to change his mind. He does....and accepts the job.
MISTAAAAAKE........
From there, things get crazy, violent and PSYCHOlarious as Andrew finds himself involved in a messed up bizzaro mystery tied to an organization known as Ghoulish Delights. Hint: get your sick bags ready. I will leave the rest to you, but along the way Andrew will encounter:
**an amoral errand boy named the Apparition,
**a sadistic, game playing serial killer,
**a horrific demonstration of the versatility of the swiss army knife; and
**a pair of cannibal puppets named Gaggles and Boo-Boo
IMPORTANT: remember that Gaggles wears the cowboy hat, Boo-Boo chomps first and it takes 58 bites to kill a woman…don’t forget.
This is fun, funny and seriously fucked up. Andrew is a very likeable guy who you will find yourself rooting for even when he's making one of those OMG decisions that everybody knows he's going to regret. Despite the dark, graphic nature of some of the scenes, the story itself does not take itself too seriously and even the extreme parts are tinged with humor.
3.5 stars. Recommended.
November 19, 2023
I've had this book on my TBR for years and I think I went in with too high of expectations. It ended up being just okay for me.
I wished Roger, the sidekick, was more interesting or added something to the story. Instead he was a completely bland character who only materialized to completed whatever less interesting chore Andrew didn't want to do. The wife and kids were cliché obstacles to Andrews fun or people that needed saving. And the villains felt cartoonish.... which isn't always bad, but in this case I loss interest pretty quickly. The whole book felt like one big missed opportunity.
I wished Roger, the sidekick, was more interesting or added something to the story. Instead he was a completely bland character who only materialized to completed whatever less interesting chore Andrew didn't want to do. The wife and kids were cliché obstacles to Andrews fun or people that needed saving. And the villains felt cartoonish.... which isn't always bad, but in this case I loss interest pretty quickly. The whole book felt like one big missed opportunity.
September 9, 2020
[1,5/10]
“Potential customers are here! Everyone act your weirdest!”
Welcome to Ghoulish Delights, a small movie production company that specializes in customized horror movies for the whole family. The introduction is prompted by a visit from private investigator Andrew Mayhem and sidekick, following an unfortunate evening mishap where the two friends accepted candy from a stranger in the form of easy money for digging up the grave of a recently deceased person. Said person being the late owner of the Ghoulish Delights company.
“We’re not making movies for commercial release, so we don’t need shocking plot twists or bold new concepts. Essentially a Ghoulish Delights movie involves somebody running around killing everyone else.” She explained this in a remarkably perky voice, as if she were hosting a cooking show.
I didn’t expect Booker Prize quality when I picked this novel for a beach read. The blurb was good enough to promise the mindless entertainment my sun addled brain needed at the moment and ...
... the book was fun, for about ten pages or so. That’s how long it took for the premise to go stale and for this particular brand of cringe comedy with an inept protagonist to get old, fast.
Well. I’d screwed things up pretty thoroughly. is the leitmotif of mr. Mayhem, happily married father of two and persistent slacker, as he tries to navigate the perils of his latest career decision to become a private investigator.
This is not my first novel by Jeff Strand, so I know he is a better writer than this particular novel would suggest. Probably, the Mayhew books are early efforts in his development as an author, and were published after a couple of better written ones.
My main gripes here are with the crude humour and the heavy reliance on cringe moments, but there are bigger issues here: like the decision to shift the novel midway from comedy to serious family troubles or Mayhew trying two switch from his stupid clown persona to that of a man dealing with a crazy serial killer. Or like the hugely improbable Ghoulish Delights real-life scenario that relies on major plot holes and crazy torture contraptions.
I could go on, but I’m trying to get over my disappointment, and I hope in a couple of years I may be able to try another Jeff Strand horror novel [most probably not one in the Andrew Mayhew series, despite their funny titles]
As I usually do when I write a negative review, I try to point out alternatives. Another reviewer mentioned that it is very hard to write horror comedy, but after Strand I tried the latest Murderbot episode from Martha Wells, and she actually makes it look easy and fun and even literary prize worthy.
Go figure!
“Potential customers are here! Everyone act your weirdest!”
Welcome to Ghoulish Delights, a small movie production company that specializes in customized horror movies for the whole family. The introduction is prompted by a visit from private investigator Andrew Mayhem and sidekick, following an unfortunate evening mishap where the two friends accepted candy from a stranger in the form of easy money for digging up the grave of a recently deceased person. Said person being the late owner of the Ghoulish Delights company.
“We’re not making movies for commercial release, so we don’t need shocking plot twists or bold new concepts. Essentially a Ghoulish Delights movie involves somebody running around killing everyone else.” She explained this in a remarkably perky voice, as if she were hosting a cooking show.
I didn’t expect Booker Prize quality when I picked this novel for a beach read. The blurb was good enough to promise the mindless entertainment my sun addled brain needed at the moment and ...
... the book was fun, for about ten pages or so. That’s how long it took for the premise to go stale and for this particular brand of cringe comedy with an inept protagonist to get old, fast.
Well. I’d screwed things up pretty thoroughly. is the leitmotif of mr. Mayhem, happily married father of two and persistent slacker, as he tries to navigate the perils of his latest career decision to become a private investigator.
This is not my first novel by Jeff Strand, so I know he is a better writer than this particular novel would suggest. Probably, the Mayhew books are early efforts in his development as an author, and were published after a couple of better written ones.
My main gripes here are with the crude humour and the heavy reliance on cringe moments, but there are bigger issues here: like the decision to shift the novel midway from comedy to serious family troubles or Mayhew trying two switch from his stupid clown persona to that of a man dealing with a crazy serial killer. Or like the hugely improbable Ghoulish Delights real-life scenario that relies on major plot holes and crazy torture contraptions.
I could go on, but I’m trying to get over my disappointment, and I hope in a couple of years I may be able to try another Jeff Strand horror novel [most probably not one in the Andrew Mayhew series, despite their funny titles]
As I usually do when I write a negative review, I try to point out alternatives. Another reviewer mentioned that it is very hard to write horror comedy, but after Strand I tried the latest Murderbot episode from Martha Wells, and she actually makes it look easy and fun and even literary prize worthy.
Go figure!
July 9, 2017
Just finished all four Andrew Mayhem books...
Brilliant!
This kind of dark humor is extremely difficult to write well, but Strand is a master. He's got that magical thing most comedians would kill for - timing! I never got the feeling that he was trying too hard. If the story called for three or four serious pages without any jokes, that's exactly what you got. And - this was the icing on the cake for me, because he didn't hold back to make it more mainstream - the extreme, gory, gross, horrible and sometimes inventive violence that occured (Respect,Sir!) made some of the jokes even funnier.
If you are easily shocked or prefer your humor clean, I would recommend Terry Pratchett. If you want a balls to the wall thrill ride of blood and guts and amputations, Strand is the man!
Brilliant!
This kind of dark humor is extremely difficult to write well, but Strand is a master. He's got that magical thing most comedians would kill for - timing! I never got the feeling that he was trying too hard. If the story called for three or four serious pages without any jokes, that's exactly what you got. And - this was the icing on the cake for me, because he didn't hold back to make it more mainstream - the extreme, gory, gross, horrible and sometimes inventive violence that occured (Respect,Sir!) made some of the jokes even funnier.
If you are easily shocked or prefer your humor clean, I would recommend Terry Pratchett. If you want a balls to the wall thrill ride of blood and guts and amputations, Strand is the man!
December 22, 2010
sad but true: a surprisingly bland piece of work...is this really the same author who penned Dweller? the dialogue is insipid and the frequent dips into mawkish setimentality become nauseous. after reading endless descriptions about how adorable the protagonist's wife and child were, it became a real challenge not to imagine choking them both out. perhaps it is some demented labor of love for the author, or a useful exorcism that is needed in order to avoid running wildly amuck in the streets. but yet there is no sense of abandon, let alone suspense, to be found anywhere in this short but tedious novel.
March 9, 2023
Amateur detective Andrew Mayhem becomes entangled in a dangerous game of cat and mouse with a saw-esque killer.
A constantly thrilling and humorous detective tale, Andrew Mayhem (despite his action hero name) is a down-to-earth average joe type character. He's not even a detective by trade, just a regular fellow who takes up odd jobs in a bid to find a suitable career. But when Andrew decided he'd like to give private detective work a go for kicks he soon realizes he's gotten in over his head.
I wouldn't call this book horror exactly. At least, that is to say, it doesn't feel to me like the book was written with the intent mainly to be terrifying to the reader but more a humorous detective novel with a horror setting.
A constantly thrilling and humorous detective tale, Andrew Mayhem (despite his action hero name) is a down-to-earth average joe type character. He's not even a detective by trade, just a regular fellow who takes up odd jobs in a bid to find a suitable career. But when Andrew decided he'd like to give private detective work a go for kicks he soon realizes he's gotten in over his head.
I wouldn't call this book horror exactly. At least, that is to say, it doesn't feel to me like the book was written with the intent mainly to be terrifying to the reader but more a humorous detective novel with a horror setting.
October 25, 2019
Fantastic! - this absurd, "far -fetched" murder mystery story was thoroughly enjoyable and kept my interest from start to finish. The actual story was well structured, full of twists and turns and the identity of the killer was carefully concealed until the very end (happy to say that I managed to get that wrong on more than one occasion). As always with Jeff Strand's fun stories, the characters were wonderful, detail great and storyline fast moving and exciting - I also noticed less blood, gore and mutilations than in most of his tales, but rest assured, if this disappoints you, the storyline and characters definitely make up for the lack of these features....still plenty of horror though!!
Ok, off to get myself a packet of Trojans and a copy of the next Andrew Mayhem story. Excellent - 5 stars, without a doubt!
Ok, off to get myself a packet of Trojans and a copy of the next Andrew Mayhem story. Excellent - 5 stars, without a doubt!
February 24, 2023
This was fun! Corny, a bit gruesome, and very entertaining. Definitely continuing the series.
October 1, 2008
All the fan boys and girls liked Black Comedy a lot, but Bloodymary, who read it for a living, did not. Bloody hated those books that promised to maintain the balance, hated the whole damn spot. Give it up; no one knows why, and to try and figure it out is too hard a task. Although I did hear someone once mention she had a stick up her a*s.
When she received Jeff Strand's Graverobbers, she laughed with glee. She planned on burning it, and doing it publicly, for all to see. She would show all the readers that black comedy just couldn’t be fun. That the attempt to balance out both could never be done. She’d put up with this nonsense for far too long, she would end it once and for all. So she opened the book and laughed with bliss. She would make this man sorry he’d sent it, and she would put it everywhere, it would be hard to miss.
So she opened the book, and whipped out her red pen to begin her job, when lo and behold, her attention was robbed. The plot was so imaginative, so unusual, and so bizarre. Even more shocking was that the story was so funny, she laughed after she finished it; she even laughed in the car. His style of writing was so concise and so tight. His actions scenes were so satisfying, his editing so precise. She could not believe it, but he had done everything right. He wrote pure terror, pure laughter, and pure fear. He captured the moment, the setting, and the atmosphere.
But she was no dummy, no fool for a trick. This man was just better at hiding his flaws; he was slick. So, she examined the speed of the events and the type of pace, looked for a flaw in Mr. Mayhem’s case. But there too she failed in her need for flaws. Mr. Strand had tied up loose ends, and his speed was quick on the draw. She was sad, but not all hope was lost. She had one more point, and that she was sure, was where it would cost. Those black comedy writers can never maintain their characters, and that was where she would score. Geez, everyone knew she was a character whore.
Imagine her surprise when she found a well-rounded, realistic cast. So well-developed, they didn’t even hide their weaknesses behind a mask. She couldn’t believe it, she was stunned into silence. The man had quieted her sarcastic words, her need for violence. Somehow or another, Jeff Strand had did it, had fought the battle and won all the gold stars! Jeff Strand is a literary hero, defrosting a frozen heart, and flooding the bars. We’re not sure how he did it, or if we should even ask. We’re just happy he removed that stick from her a*s.!!
My rating? I give it a 5. All those with shovels, digging in sand, all those with gravedirt stuck to their hands, all those who read books for laughter and fear, should buy Graverobbers Wanted, and read it, year after year. Buy this book new, Now!!!
-As reviewed on Horror-Web.com
When she received Jeff Strand's Graverobbers, she laughed with glee. She planned on burning it, and doing it publicly, for all to see. She would show all the readers that black comedy just couldn’t be fun. That the attempt to balance out both could never be done. She’d put up with this nonsense for far too long, she would end it once and for all. So she opened the book and laughed with bliss. She would make this man sorry he’d sent it, and she would put it everywhere, it would be hard to miss.
So she opened the book, and whipped out her red pen to begin her job, when lo and behold, her attention was robbed. The plot was so imaginative, so unusual, and so bizarre. Even more shocking was that the story was so funny, she laughed after she finished it; she even laughed in the car. His style of writing was so concise and so tight. His actions scenes were so satisfying, his editing so precise. She could not believe it, but he had done everything right. He wrote pure terror, pure laughter, and pure fear. He captured the moment, the setting, and the atmosphere.
But she was no dummy, no fool for a trick. This man was just better at hiding his flaws; he was slick. So, she examined the speed of the events and the type of pace, looked for a flaw in Mr. Mayhem’s case. But there too she failed in her need for flaws. Mr. Strand had tied up loose ends, and his speed was quick on the draw. She was sad, but not all hope was lost. She had one more point, and that she was sure, was where it would cost. Those black comedy writers can never maintain their characters, and that was where she would score. Geez, everyone knew she was a character whore.
Imagine her surprise when she found a well-rounded, realistic cast. So well-developed, they didn’t even hide their weaknesses behind a mask. She couldn’t believe it, she was stunned into silence. The man had quieted her sarcastic words, her need for violence. Somehow or another, Jeff Strand had did it, had fought the battle and won all the gold stars! Jeff Strand is a literary hero, defrosting a frozen heart, and flooding the bars. We’re not sure how he did it, or if we should even ask. We’re just happy he removed that stick from her a*s.!!
My rating? I give it a 5. All those with shovels, digging in sand, all those with gravedirt stuck to their hands, all those who read books for laughter and fear, should buy Graverobbers Wanted, and read it, year after year. Buy this book new, Now!!!
-As reviewed on Horror-Web.com
October 25, 2019
Another Jeff Strand book, this must be my 5th or 6th and I confess in advance that I am now a fan. I have come to know, love and rely on his books they are always good and I love the way he writes dialogue, very natural and amusing at the same time, and then there is the oddball premise, something stranger than most of us would ever think up and off we go on a gory mystery tour that is as gross as it is funny. This ticks all those boxes. It was more of a thriller type story than out and out horror but yes there was plenty of gore and non stop entertainment, literally never a dull moment in this story and much as I kept guessing I couldn't for the life of me work out who was behind it all.
As the title suggests this is about a couple of graverobbers, not that they aren’t perfectly decent people normally (honest!), a one off job leads them down a dark path and them entangled with people they don’t want to be entangled with, helped along by some monumentally stupid decisions by the protagonist Andrew. I can’t say much more without giving anything away but if you like gore and fun and silly ideas then this is for you and you won’t be disappointed.
This gets a very decent 4.5*/5 rounded up because it’s too good for just a 4.
As the title suggests this is about a couple of graverobbers, not that they aren’t perfectly decent people normally (honest!), a one off job leads them down a dark path and them entangled with people they don’t want to be entangled with, helped along by some monumentally stupid decisions by the protagonist Andrew. I can’t say much more without giving anything away but if you like gore and fun and silly ideas then this is for you and you won’t be disappointed.
This gets a very decent 4.5*/5 rounded up because it’s too good for just a 4.
May 1, 2020
Най-леймъновата книга от прочетените до тук на Джеф Странд.
Започва като леко кретенска кримка, продължава като малко стряскаща кретенска кримка и завършва в абсурден горе фест с кретенски елементи. Не съм голям фен на черната комедия, но Странд е забъркал точно правилните дози жанрови подправки, за да ми хареса. Естествено, на някой може да му дойде горница нещо, дали касапницата, дали комедията.
Андрю е типичен безделник в зряла възраст, който мързелува под предлог, че търси себе си. Жена му не знам как го трае, а двете му дца са стихийни бедствия. Когато получава предложение да изкара малко странични пари, той се хвърля с две ръце и няколко крака. Какво толкова? Да изкопаеш пресен гроб в гората, да вземеш нещо от мъртвеца и да го заровиш. Трупът, обаче се оказва жив, не за дълго. Симпатичната блондинка работодател също така, а някакъв психопат решава, че Андрю ще е следващият му голям проект и се почва една...
Нарязани трупове, снъф, машини за разпарчетосване, заложници, студио за частни хрър филми и един пълен, ама пълен кретен с голямо сърце.
Доволно, но Ловът на върколака ми хареса доста повече, може би защото е писана в по-напреднал стадий от кариерата на автора и стилът му се очертава по-ясно.
Започва като леко кретенска кримка, продължава като малко стряскаща кретенска кримка и завършва в абсурден горе фест с кретенски елементи. Не съм голям фен на черната комедия, но Странд е забъркал точно правилните дози жанрови подправки, за да ми хареса. Естествено, на някой може да му дойде горница нещо, дали касапницата, дали комедията.
Андрю е типичен безделник в зряла възраст, който мързелува под предлог, че търси себе си. Жена му не знам как го трае, а двете му дца са стихийни бедствия. Когато получава предложение да изкара малко странични пари, той се хвърля с две ръце и няколко крака. Какво толкова? Да изкопаеш пресен гроб в гората, да вземеш нещо от мъртвеца и да го заровиш. Трупът, обаче се оказва жив, не за дълго. Симпатичната блондинка работодател също така, а някакъв психопат решава, че Андрю ще е следващият му голям проект и се почва една...
Нарязани трупове, снъф, машини за разпарчетосване, заложници, студио за частни хрър филми и един пълен, ама пълен кретен с голямо сърце.
Доволно, но Ловът на върколака ми хареса доста повече, може би защото е писана в по-напреднал стадий от кариерата на автора и стилът му се очертава по-ясно.
May 20, 2015
A perfectly serviceable early work from Jeff Strand, who of late has become something of a favourite author of mine. Graverobbers Wanted takes a fair number of pages to really get going, with a significant proportion of that dedicated to building up the POV character, Andrew Mayhem. Once it does get rolling, however, Strand let's his inner horror writer loose, and the book immediately improves several notches. Special points must also be awarded for the impressive death trap one character is subjected to in a public car park.
I thought this one was destined for four star status, until I realised how disposable Mayhem's children were in the convenient plot-device kind of way. There is simply no way a father could be this irresponsible with his kids and get away with it for any length of time. So for the first three-quarters of the book I thought the kids merely existed to give Mayhem some contextual humanity. But by the end of proceedings, it became apparent they were meant for something more - even if what that was only served to highlight my annoyance with the protagonist as a father even more.
So we're back into 3 star territory - with the earnest hope that the next book in the series addresses this annoying depiction of parenthood. Because even if it doesn't, I know I'll be on board to see what kind of kooky, murderous adventure Strand has in store for Mayhem and co next time around.
3 Pre-Saw Death Traps for Graverobbers Wanted: No Experience Necessary.
I thought this one was destined for four star status, until I realised how disposable Mayhem's children were in the convenient plot-device kind of way. There is simply no way a father could be this irresponsible with his kids and get away with it for any length of time. So for the first three-quarters of the book I thought the kids merely existed to give Mayhem some contextual humanity. But by the end of proceedings, it became apparent they were meant for something more - even if what that was only served to highlight my annoyance with the protagonist as a father even more.
So we're back into 3 star territory - with the earnest hope that the next book in the series addresses this annoying depiction of parenthood. Because even if it doesn't, I know I'll be on board to see what kind of kooky, murderous adventure Strand has in store for Mayhem and co next time around.
3 Pre-Saw Death Traps for Graverobbers Wanted: No Experience Necessary.
December 26, 2020
Thoroughly enjoyed this one. It's crazy, funny, over the top and was an absolute blast. So glad i have four more in the series to pick up next.
November 27, 2023
Jeff Strand is the author I thought Grady Hendrix was. Do not get me wrong. I am not insulting Mr. Hendrix, it's just that I always anticipate that his horror books are going to be funnier than they are based on the titles. This is totally on me.
Jeff Strand made a very funny splatterpunk book with Graverobbers Wanted: No Experience Necessary.
Jeff Strand made a very funny splatterpunk book with Graverobbers Wanted: No Experience Necessary.
April 8, 2018
Jeff Strand just makes me laugh. We start at the beginning with a note: "Graverobbers Wanted (No Experience Necessary) was written in the late 90s and first published in 2000. That is why there are references to silly things like pagers and VHS tapes." And then he calls the black cat "Reverse Snowflake." And his wife tells him: "Andrew, please don't talk to our children any more than is absolutely necessary."
Anyway, Andrew and Roger are approached by a beautiful woman and solicited to dig up her husband's grave for $20,000. So naturally, they say yes. After all, she was beautiful. And she swears she didn't kill him. Digging up the grave, they hear an odd noise. Then when they open the pine box, he bursts out with a gun, pretty deranged from having been buried alive and actually dies. Andrew and Roger are subsequently shot with arrows and kidnapped, thrusting them into a came of cat and mouse with a deranged killer that they can't possibly win. Or can they?
Not my favorite Strand novel, but quality entertainment.
Anyway, Andrew and Roger are approached by a beautiful woman and solicited to dig up her husband's grave for $20,000. So naturally, they say yes. After all, she was beautiful. And she swears she didn't kill him. Digging up the grave, they hear an odd noise. Then when they open the pine box, he bursts out with a gun, pretty deranged from having been buried alive and actually dies. Andrew and Roger are subsequently shot with arrows and kidnapped, thrusting them into a came of cat and mouse with a deranged killer that they can't possibly win. Or can they?
Not my favorite Strand novel, but quality entertainment.
January 9, 2022
I read Good Deeds by Jeff Strands a month ago, and it was fantastic. I didn't pay much attention to the goodreads tags, so my expectations were shifting the further I read the book. At first I thought it was some kind of supernatural. They dug up someone who came to life (who has a company Ghoulish Delights) and has a mysterious character called The Apparition. But nope, it's not supernatural. Then it felt more like an odd cozy mystery, since andrew doesn't take much seriously. Then it gets darker. Some of the comedy felt too forced to me, and I think it would be improved if it was toned down in a few places. Andrew makes fun of himself and comments he'd make more progress on the mystery if he just sat in his car and waited for the villain to give him the envelope clues instead of going around town. I got some inspector gadget vibes, where andrew is the detective and the villain takes Penny's place trying to help andrew solve the mystery.
I was losing interest once it got to . I think the last part of the book could have been improved.
I was losing interest once it got to . I think the last part of the book could have been improved.
July 13, 2012
The first of four books published (as of this review) in the Andrew Mayhem series introduces Andrew as a struggling father who takes on a strange job digging up a grave for $10,000 (his cut).
This is more of a mystery thriller, complete with a whodunit, as opposed to the horror humor tale that Strand has written and I enjoyed immensely like Wolf Hunt. Nor was it much like his excellent straight horror tale Dweller or even his humor thriller zombie tale, The Sinister Mr. Corpse. Instead, it's more of mystery fare sort of a la Naked Gun (I'm starting to wonder if Strand is related to Zucker?) with a less funny Frank Drebbin character (Mayhem isn't even a private detective). You can tell Strand wrote Graverobbers, as it has his telltale witty comebacks and superb dialogue.
The author replied to me in a group recently that these books were better than the short tales in the collection he co-authored with J.A. Konrath entitled, Suckers. I agree this book is better than those short Mayhem tales, but I'm still somewhat lukewarm on Mayhem. He's not a very likable or good father and his deductive skill are questionable. He's sort of like a wannabe Inspector Closeau sans the clumsiness meets the aforementioned Frank Drebbin sans the partner with the brains. Just like Inspector Gadget has Penny to help with the brains, I think Mayhem needs a better sidekick than the one he has in this story (definitely a far cry from Watson). Perhaps in future stories in the series he gets one.
Like the other books I've read by Strand, this is a very fast read. His style doesn't lend to slow reads and that's a good thing for humor (if one joke doesn't work, move quickly to another). At times, Strand reads like a stand-up comedian doing fiction. I dig it. Authors who are fast reads earn bonus points with this reader.
As for humor? Jeff Strand is funny. He knows how to write some laugh out loud sentences and creates several funny scenes in Mayhem's debut novel. For that execution alone, I will eventually read Mayhem book #2. Maybe I'll warm up to Mayhem himself more as the series continues. Graverobbers is 3.5 stars for me, but I'll round up because the author made me laugh in several places and kept me turning pages. Thank you for the laughs, again and again.
This is more of a mystery thriller, complete with a whodunit, as opposed to the horror humor tale that Strand has written and I enjoyed immensely like Wolf Hunt. Nor was it much like his excellent straight horror tale Dweller or even his humor thriller zombie tale, The Sinister Mr. Corpse. Instead, it's more of mystery fare sort of a la Naked Gun (I'm starting to wonder if Strand is related to Zucker?) with a less funny Frank Drebbin character (Mayhem isn't even a private detective). You can tell Strand wrote Graverobbers, as it has his telltale witty comebacks and superb dialogue.
The author replied to me in a group recently that these books were better than the short tales in the collection he co-authored with J.A. Konrath entitled, Suckers. I agree this book is better than those short Mayhem tales, but I'm still somewhat lukewarm on Mayhem. He's not a very likable or good father and his deductive skill are questionable. He's sort of like a wannabe Inspector Closeau sans the clumsiness meets the aforementioned Frank Drebbin sans the partner with the brains. Just like Inspector Gadget has Penny to help with the brains, I think Mayhem needs a better sidekick than the one he has in this story (definitely a far cry from Watson). Perhaps in future stories in the series he gets one.
Like the other books I've read by Strand, this is a very fast read. His style doesn't lend to slow reads and that's a good thing for humor (if one joke doesn't work, move quickly to another). At times, Strand reads like a stand-up comedian doing fiction. I dig it. Authors who are fast reads earn bonus points with this reader.
As for humor? Jeff Strand is funny. He knows how to write some laugh out loud sentences and creates several funny scenes in Mayhem's debut novel. For that execution alone, I will eventually read Mayhem book #2. Maybe I'll warm up to Mayhem himself more as the series continues. Graverobbers is 3.5 stars for me, but I'll round up because the author made me laugh in several places and kept me turning pages. Thank you for the laughs, again and again.
February 9, 2018
If somebody comes up to you and offers you $20K to dig up a grave and retrieve a key from the corpse, it would be a wise idea to turn down the assignment. However, Andrew Mayhem, a married father of two small children, is anything but wise. He can’t hold down a job and makes some seriously bad decisions. Despite that, he has some endearing qualities, and when push comes to shove, he’ll do whatever he has to, to keep his children safe. When Andrew and his friend take the assignment, the corpse turns out to be alive and wielding a gun. Things only get worse from there as Andrew comes across Ghoulish Delights, which fronts as a production company for hire for people wanting to star in short horror movies. It becomes very apparent to Andrew that Ghoulish Delights is a front for something far more serious.
This is the first novel I’ve read from Jeff Strand that is geared to adults. He’s great at young adult novels, and as it turns out, he’s pretty good at writing more mature themes. The protagonist is a very flawed character, and at first I wasn’t entirely fond of him, but as the book wore on, I grew more fond of him, particularly late in the novel when he had to save his children from serious harm. It’s something that any parent can relate to. My biggest quibble with the novel was that there were a couple of scenes that were a bit unrealistic and it became hard to suspend disbelief. What worked really well was how things just kept getting worse and worse for Andrew, and he had to show some serious mettle and resourcefulness to get out of them. This novel highlighted one of the things I really enjoy about Strand’s writing—his ability to put the screws to his characters and put them in some difficult situations, and just when you think it can’t get any worse for them, they do. This was an enjoyable novel, and I look forward to reading the second in the series.
Carl Alves - author of Battle of the Soul
This is the first novel I’ve read from Jeff Strand that is geared to adults. He’s great at young adult novels, and as it turns out, he’s pretty good at writing more mature themes. The protagonist is a very flawed character, and at first I wasn’t entirely fond of him, but as the book wore on, I grew more fond of him, particularly late in the novel when he had to save his children from serious harm. It’s something that any parent can relate to. My biggest quibble with the novel was that there were a couple of scenes that were a bit unrealistic and it became hard to suspend disbelief. What worked really well was how things just kept getting worse and worse for Andrew, and he had to show some serious mettle and resourcefulness to get out of them. This novel highlighted one of the things I really enjoy about Strand’s writing—his ability to put the screws to his characters and put them in some difficult situations, and just when you think it can’t get any worse for them, they do. This was an enjoyable novel, and I look forward to reading the second in the series.
Carl Alves - author of Battle of the Soul
June 25, 2011
You know, after reading hundreds of horror novels you start to wonder how many times you can be surprised with something that seems totally original. I enjoy all horror, but the same old plots get, well, old after a while. Strand’s Graverobbers Wanted is one of those beautiful books that I can say nothing, absolutely nothing bad about because I loved every word, hell, every letter of it. It is brilliant beyond anything I would have expected from the description of the book and the title. Basically, in this book, it is like Richard Laymon had a baby with Douglas Adams and then stoll a plot from one of Doyle’s old Sherlock Holmes mysteries and then somehow managed to make all of it hilariously original in the most unpredictable way imaginable. Seriously, I could not predict anything in this book. There were so many times where I could not only predict what would happen next, but didn’t have a clue at all. I love that. I hate knowing what will happen next. It is why I read horror; because the rule book seems to be thrown out the window and things are unpredictable from time to time. This book is amazing and I’m going to rap up this review (not that good of one because I want to move on to the next Andrew Mayhem novel) to read Single White Psychopath Seeks Same. I will end, rather childishly and lazily, by saying that Strand is brilliant and the two novels I have read by him so far have been as well. Read it! No, read them! All! Now!!!
June 24, 2009
I bought GRAVEROBBERS...based on the interview that JA Konrath and Jeff Strand did with each other back in March, I think.
This book made me laugh and scared the bejeezus out of me. Andrew is trying to find his niche in life. Some might call him a slacker. I know I'd be hard pressed to be married to a guy like this..maybe could be a friend. He's smart and funny, really a smartass is what he is and I am drawn to funny smart smartasses....
He and his buddy, Roger, find themselves pulled into a way to make $20,000. All they have to do is dig up a coffin carrying the body of the husband of the woman who hired them. Then all hell breaks loose.
Andrew is fairly quick on his feet in a believable way. I really never felt the need to roll my eyes at any time while reading his terror filled adventure. He finds himself in this situation, he continues with the terror filled mystery when others would have just given in. And it felt real.
I imagine this book would be what the never-ending series of 'Saw' flicks could be like. The murder, torture, and the mechanisms used to get there are beyond my normal ick factor, yet I couldn't stop reading the story.
Five terror and funny beans
This book made me laugh and scared the bejeezus out of me. Andrew is trying to find his niche in life. Some might call him a slacker. I know I'd be hard pressed to be married to a guy like this..maybe could be a friend. He's smart and funny, really a smartass is what he is and I am drawn to funny smart smartasses....
He and his buddy, Roger, find themselves pulled into a way to make $20,000. All they have to do is dig up a coffin carrying the body of the husband of the woman who hired them. Then all hell breaks loose.
Andrew is fairly quick on his feet in a believable way. I really never felt the need to roll my eyes at any time while reading his terror filled adventure. He finds himself in this situation, he continues with the terror filled mystery when others would have just given in. And it felt real.
I imagine this book would be what the never-ending series of 'Saw' flicks could be like. The murder, torture, and the mechanisms used to get there are beyond my normal ick factor, yet I couldn't stop reading the story.
Five terror and funny beans
September 28, 2013
This book is like the mixture of the films "8mm" and "Saw" - just that, instead of Nicholas Cage as the committed private investigator, we have happy-go-lucky slacker Andrew Mayhem, whose knack for solving puzzles is inversely proportional to his propensity to involve himself in the most bizarre situations. Well, it´s rather through his enterprises gone awry that Andrew´s best friend Roger and, later on, his children too, are in awful peril. In any case, Jeff Strand will keep you guessing, trembling and laughing all along as Andrew attempts to save the day - only to blunder yet again, in perfect consonance with his surname. Fabulous blend of the grim and the hilarious!
December 8, 2022
Completely farfetched? You bet.
Fun as hell? You bet.
Creative and creepy? You bet.
Jeff Strand may be the best I’ve ever seen at effectively and seamlessly mixing horror and comedy in his novels. The balance is perfect. This was a blast, simply put. I’m hoping to read the next in the series soon.
Fun as hell? You bet.
Creative and creepy? You bet.
Jeff Strand may be the best I’ve ever seen at effectively and seamlessly mixing horror and comedy in his novels. The balance is perfect. This was a blast, simply put. I’m hoping to read the next in the series soon.
March 6, 2020
I'm going to keep this pretty brief. Andrew the MC is a complete loser. His wife works hard in her job while his idea of working for a living is to take the odd job that a qualified PI would do-spying on a cheating husband to get video evidence. The problem is, Andrew is an idiot. He is armed with his wife's video camera and climbs up a tree in broad daylight to film through a window and wonder why security catch him and give him a beating. I cannot for the life of me see why any woman would stay with such an idiot who provides nothing in the way of money, security or competant childcare. I didn't stick with this one for long as I wanted to throttle Andrew after just a couple of chapters.
December 20, 2022
The first installment of Jeff Strand’s Andrew Mayhem series is a perfect blend of comedy, horror, and thrills. I couldn’t put it down!
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February 21, 2023rtc
July 28, 2022
I really loved this book. It was fun, kinda cheesy at times, somewhat predictable but still a really nice read. If you like horror and twisted killers give it a read.
HOWEVER, I did not enjoy Mr. Hempel, I did not enjoy your telling of the story, sorry it’s a book with a lot of attitude but all the characters sounded so smarmy with you.
HOWEVER, I did not enjoy Mr. Hempel, I did not enjoy your telling of the story, sorry it’s a book with a lot of attitude but all the characters sounded so smarmy with you.
July 28, 2016
Review of GRAVEROBBERS WANTED: NO EXPERIENCE NECESSARY by Jeff Strand {Andrew Mayhem #1}
GRAVEROBBERS WANTED: NO EXPERIENCE NECESSARY had literally been on my TBR list for about 4.5 years, the second book I listed as "to read" after I joined Goodreads on 1 January 2012. Just recently I found the ANDREW MAYHEM COLLECTION on Kindle Unlimited, a set of the first four books in Jeff Strand's wonderful Andrew Mayhem Series. Talk about feckless protagonists [I've been reviewing a 6-book series with a female protagonist who is nothing but feckless]: Andrew Mayhem, husband, father of 2 feisty offspring, non-worker, bouncing from university major to major to major, now from not-job to not-job, doing odds and ends to earn an income while his registered nurse wife "brings home the bacon," tries out videotaping a cheating spouse (not his) and ends up beaten and assaulted (not by cheater but on his behalf) which is very difficult to explain to Andrew's long-suffering wife Helen. Next, in the vein of "too good to be true," a curvaceous blonde offers Andrew and best friend Roger (never the sharpest tool in the shed) 20K to--wait for it--exhume her husband. But hang on! Husband isn't buried in a cemetery. No, his grave is off in the woods, isolated, untended, and had nothing to do with a funeral home or normal interment.
That alone would make most folks suspicious, and leery of participating. Not so this non-dynamic duo. Before the novel ends, a lot of people are going to get hurt, some very badly (fatally and it's not pretty), there will be abductions, confinement, terrors, threats, natural deaths, and broken bones. The storyline turns really ugly but unfortunately, somewhere in the world such events probably are occurring, given the nature of modern culture. Mr. Strand manages to leaven the horror throughout with the most clever humor. I generally eschew comedy in favor of real horror, but in this storyline I don't think I could have handled my outrage if it weren't for the consistent humorous notes so cleverly interwoven. Kudos to Jeff Strand for bringing a mystery that is both humor-filled and horrendous.
GRAVEROBBERS WANTED: NO EXPERIENCE NECESSARY had literally been on my TBR list for about 4.5 years, the second book I listed as "to read" after I joined Goodreads on 1 January 2012. Just recently I found the ANDREW MAYHEM COLLECTION on Kindle Unlimited, a set of the first four books in Jeff Strand's wonderful Andrew Mayhem Series. Talk about feckless protagonists [I've been reviewing a 6-book series with a female protagonist who is nothing but feckless]: Andrew Mayhem, husband, father of 2 feisty offspring, non-worker, bouncing from university major to major to major, now from not-job to not-job, doing odds and ends to earn an income while his registered nurse wife "brings home the bacon," tries out videotaping a cheating spouse (not his) and ends up beaten and assaulted (not by cheater but on his behalf) which is very difficult to explain to Andrew's long-suffering wife Helen. Next, in the vein of "too good to be true," a curvaceous blonde offers Andrew and best friend Roger (never the sharpest tool in the shed) 20K to--wait for it--exhume her husband. But hang on! Husband isn't buried in a cemetery. No, his grave is off in the woods, isolated, untended, and had nothing to do with a funeral home or normal interment.
That alone would make most folks suspicious, and leery of participating. Not so this non-dynamic duo. Before the novel ends, a lot of people are going to get hurt, some very badly (fatally and it's not pretty), there will be abductions, confinement, terrors, threats, natural deaths, and broken bones. The storyline turns really ugly but unfortunately, somewhere in the world such events probably are occurring, given the nature of modern culture. Mr. Strand manages to leaven the horror throughout with the most clever humor. I generally eschew comedy in favor of real horror, but in this storyline I don't think I could have handled my outrage if it weren't for the consistent humorous notes so cleverly interwoven. Kudos to Jeff Strand for bringing a mystery that is both humor-filled and horrendous.
December 28, 2010
Graverobbers Wanted (No Experience Necessary) by Jeff Strand was another book high on my “Wanted” list that I finally got around to picking up cheap for Kindle (I believe for only $2.39). And like a few other books I’ve read recently, I had heard a lot of good things about it. I wasn’t quite sure what to expect from the book, but based on the title and what little I knew about Jeff Strand’s writing style I figured it would be a fun read.
In this first book of the Mayhem series, we are introduced to Andrew Mayhem—devoted husband, loving father, wannabe private eye, and all-around magnet for trouble. If there was ever a poster boy for the slogan “Sh*t Happens,” Andrew is it. In this story, we find Andrew short on money, without a steady job, and owing money for a recent car accident. Enter the beautiful woman with an offer for Andrew and his friend, Roger, they simply cannot refuse. How much trouble can they really get into by digging up a fresh grave? Turns out A LOT. What follows is a wild ride in which the stakes steadily rise.
Strand’s prose is snappy and reads quickly, and his dialogue flows naturally. I don’t normally care much for my comedy and action/horror mixed, but Strand expertly blends them to create a hilarious thrill ride that will keep you turning the pages. Strand’s writing is unique and not quite like anyone else’s I’ve read. The Kindle edition is nicely formatted and there are a very few minor errors/typos. Be forewarned: if you read this book you will want to get the others in the series (Single White Psychopath Seeks Same and Casket For Sale (Only Used Once)).
This was one of the most fun reads I’ve had this past year and I’ll be jumping on the other two books in the series soon. I highly recommend this one to those who enjoy action/horror books. And while there is plenty that is funny in this book, it’s not for the faint-hearted, as the book does get darker throughout and deals with subjects that may be too disturbing for some readers.
In this first book of the Mayhem series, we are introduced to Andrew Mayhem—devoted husband, loving father, wannabe private eye, and all-around magnet for trouble. If there was ever a poster boy for the slogan “Sh*t Happens,” Andrew is it. In this story, we find Andrew short on money, without a steady job, and owing money for a recent car accident. Enter the beautiful woman with an offer for Andrew and his friend, Roger, they simply cannot refuse. How much trouble can they really get into by digging up a fresh grave? Turns out A LOT. What follows is a wild ride in which the stakes steadily rise.
Strand’s prose is snappy and reads quickly, and his dialogue flows naturally. I don’t normally care much for my comedy and action/horror mixed, but Strand expertly blends them to create a hilarious thrill ride that will keep you turning the pages. Strand’s writing is unique and not quite like anyone else’s I’ve read. The Kindle edition is nicely formatted and there are a very few minor errors/typos. Be forewarned: if you read this book you will want to get the others in the series (Single White Psychopath Seeks Same and Casket For Sale (Only Used Once)).
This was one of the most fun reads I’ve had this past year and I’ll be jumping on the other two books in the series soon. I highly recommend this one to those who enjoy action/horror books. And while there is plenty that is funny in this book, it’s not for the faint-hearted, as the book does get darker throughout and deals with subjects that may be too disturbing for some readers.
November 7, 2020
A hilarious and gruesome thriller that you’ll probably gobble up like popcorn.
Andrew Mayhem is a thirty-something smartarse (or ‘wise ass’, for those of you in the States) with a wife, two kids, but no real job. In an attempt to combat his perennial lack of responsibility, and help provide for his family, he ends up embroiled in a gruesome web of death and insanity involving illicit burials, grave-robbing, death traps, snuff movies, and a cat called Reverse Snowflake.
Graverobbers Wanted is compulsively readable. The prose is so smooth you can blaze through this book like Cheech and Chong through a pound of Panama Red. Strand does an amazing job of juggling – and even combining – chilling suspense with total hilarity.
I couldn’t get enough of this thing. I gobbled it up, then started binge-reading the sequels, even though I’ve got literally hundreds of other books on my reading list!
These books are like crack. I’m glad they’re not made of chocolate or I’d be popping buttons off my shirts and needing new notches in my belt.
If you want something thrilling, grisly, suspenseful, horrific, and most of all FUN, check out the Andrew Mayhem series!
Andrew Mayhem is a thirty-something smartarse (or ‘wise ass’, for those of you in the States) with a wife, two kids, but no real job. In an attempt to combat his perennial lack of responsibility, and help provide for his family, he ends up embroiled in a gruesome web of death and insanity involving illicit burials, grave-robbing, death traps, snuff movies, and a cat called Reverse Snowflake.
Graverobbers Wanted is compulsively readable. The prose is so smooth you can blaze through this book like Cheech and Chong through a pound of Panama Red. Strand does an amazing job of juggling – and even combining – chilling suspense with total hilarity.
I couldn’t get enough of this thing. I gobbled it up, then started binge-reading the sequels, even though I’ve got literally hundreds of other books on my reading list!
These books are like crack. I’m glad they’re not made of chocolate or I’d be popping buttons off my shirts and needing new notches in my belt.
If you want something thrilling, grisly, suspenseful, horrific, and most of all FUN, check out the Andrew Mayhem series!
October 12, 2014
Working 13 hr shifts and devoting most of my time at home to my little girls, it's a challenge to find time to read as much as I'd like to. Yesterday, I dipped into my first experience with Jeff Strand and somehow managed to read the entire book in one day (thanks girls, for letting daddy sneak away every now and then;). I loved this book. I'll even go out on a limb and say it was the best book I've read this year...maybe even the past couple of years. It was funny...no hilarious at times. It was scary...scratch that.. It was terrifying at times. It was fast paced and never once did it get to that point where I wanted to put it down. This guy can write and I simply can't wait to read more from him. Already ordered a few more books of his online. I'm not going to go into plot details. In fact, do what I did and pick up this book and start reading it before you even read the back cover's synopsis. Just dive in and enjoy the ride. (Can you tell I really liked this book?).
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