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Still Wrestling: Faith Renewed through Brokenness
Not yet published
Expected 10 Apr 08In the aftermath of a double murder, a destroyed family, and a shattered faith, Les gives hope to others wrestling with God through a dramatically different study of the Bible’s characters.
Life happens to us all. When good turns to bad, the journey from bad back to good can seem impossible. In this candid book, Pastor Les Ferguson shares his true story of when he struggled to believe not that God existed but that he cared. The questions of faith and doubt shared in Still Wrestling show Les’s journey through tragedy to a deep, renewed faith.
Les approaches God’s word from a perspective entirely different from the average Sunday school book. He guides readers through a study of the Bible’s characters by examining their humanity, seeing their fears, and acknowledging their weaknesses, exploring our own brokenness through the broken characters of God’s Word.
Life happens to us all. When good turns to bad, the journey from bad back to good can seem impossible. In this candid book, Pastor Les Ferguson shares his true story of when he struggled to believe not that God existed but that he cared. The questions of faith and doubt shared in Still Wrestling show Les’s journey through tragedy to a deep, renewed faith.
Les approaches God’s word from a perspective entirely different from the average Sunday school book. He guides readers through a study of the Bible’s characters by examining their humanity, seeing their fears, and acknowledging their weaknesses, exploring our own brokenness through the broken characters of God’s Word.
208 pages, Paperback
Expected publication April 10, 2108
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266 people want to read
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Displaying 1 - 11 of 11 reviews
May 27, 2018
My favourite thing about this book is its absolute honesty about where Ferguson is with his faith. It's easy to talk about bad stuff or doubt and then gloss it over with a flippant "I'm better now" or "I've overcome that" especially when you're a preacher.
But Ferguson doesn't take the easy way out. Right near the beginning, in his introduction, he hits you with this:
Towards the end, through the expected look-aheads and positive notes, he also offers acknowledgement that the fight isn't over yet, with these:
In between, Ferguson explores 26 different stories from the Bible, both OT and NT, from a single perspective: pain and brokenness. He's honest about where he was and where he sometimes still is: running away from God, doubting God, questioning God, struggling so much against all that we're supposed to know and be just by virtue of being "Christian." At times, it looks bleak, but at times God's light also shines through. Sometimes he asks the hard questions, even those he would rather not ask, would rather not know.
I think, in the end, what you get out of this book will be what you put into it. Ferguson is being vulnerable here, and if you're still hiding behind that pretty veneer of respectability and strength, you'll spend most of your time avoiding the hard-hitting questions. True, not all the stories and narrative (and questions) impacted me personally, but as a whole, Ferguson tackles a difficult subject from a wealth of experience and from multiple angles.
Don't look for platitudes of faith where everything is nicely tied up and presented. You'll find instead plenty of brokenness on display--and yet despite it all, shattered faith is still faith.
Note: I received a digital copy of this book from NetGalley. I was given the book with no expectation of a positive review and the review is my own.
But Ferguson doesn't take the easy way out. Right near the beginning, in his introduction, he hits you with this:
It wasn't that I doubted God's existence. No, I doubted whether I mattered to God at all. And if I didn't matter to God, then how could his Word offer any hope to me?"
Towards the end, through the expected look-aheads and positive notes, he also offers acknowledgement that the fight isn't over yet, with these:
Sometimes I get mad at God. Often the only time it seems I really talk to him is when I need something.
Though smiling and laughing at memories happens often, fresh tears are never far away.... So keep wrestling. Don't quit. Remember this is just a battle--God has already won the war.
In between, Ferguson explores 26 different stories from the Bible, both OT and NT, from a single perspective: pain and brokenness. He's honest about where he was and where he sometimes still is: running away from God, doubting God, questioning God, struggling so much against all that we're supposed to know and be just by virtue of being "Christian." At times, it looks bleak, but at times God's light also shines through. Sometimes he asks the hard questions, even those he would rather not ask, would rather not know.
The real question isn't why he did or why he didn't. The real question is, Will we serve him anyway? The real question is, Will we trust him?
I think, in the end, what you get out of this book will be what you put into it. Ferguson is being vulnerable here, and if you're still hiding behind that pretty veneer of respectability and strength, you'll spend most of your time avoiding the hard-hitting questions. True, not all the stories and narrative (and questions) impacted me personally, but as a whole, Ferguson tackles a difficult subject from a wealth of experience and from multiple angles.
Don't look for platitudes of faith where everything is nicely tied up and presented. You'll find instead plenty of brokenness on display--and yet despite it all, shattered faith is still faith.
Note: I received a digital copy of this book from NetGalley. I was given the book with no expectation of a positive review and the review is my own.
May 2, 2018
This book begins with a chilling account of the loss that Les and his family endured. In vivid and heartbreaking detail Les shares both what happened and his response in trying to deal with the many complications of this loss.
The honesty with which Les writes will draw the reader in. But not only as an observer of what has happened to him, but as a participant in the struggles of life that have significant challenges for all.
In most of the chapters, Les centers in on a Biblical character who has had significant life losses and struggles. In the retelling and examination of these stories we are reminded that though our losses may be different, the God who sees us through them is the same.
In the end, Les centers his faith in Jesus Christ. However, this is not a book that denies the ongoing pain of loss. I appreciate the way that Les balances out the pain and the faith that seem opposed to one another.
Discussion questions follow each chapter, making it suitable for a small group or class. I read the Kindle edition which was excellent and performed perfectly.
The honesty with which Les writes will draw the reader in. But not only as an observer of what has happened to him, but as a participant in the struggles of life that have significant challenges for all.
In most of the chapters, Les centers in on a Biblical character who has had significant life losses and struggles. In the retelling and examination of these stories we are reminded that though our losses may be different, the God who sees us through them is the same.
In the end, Les centers his faith in Jesus Christ. However, this is not a book that denies the ongoing pain of loss. I appreciate the way that Les balances out the pain and the faith that seem opposed to one another.
Discussion questions follow each chapter, making it suitable for a small group or class. I read the Kindle edition which was excellent and performed perfectly.
May 23, 2018
Les Ferguson is a pastor whose life was torn apart when his wife and son were murdered. He begins the book with an autobiographical section entitled "I am a Mess" in which he describes his personal trauma and journey to recover a normal life.
The rest of the book consists of short chapters that are studies of biblical characters. Ferguson applies his unique life experience to the lives of the biblical characters and finds insights that are not found in traditional exegesis. He states: "My approach has been to look at them sideways. To see beyond the flat page. To consider multiple dimensions. To put ourselves in their shoes." He does a good job of seeing old stories with a new perspective.
Thanks to NetGalley and Leafwood Publishers for providing an advance reader copy of this book in exchange for an honest review.
The rest of the book consists of short chapters that are studies of biblical characters. Ferguson applies his unique life experience to the lives of the biblical characters and finds insights that are not found in traditional exegesis. He states: "My approach has been to look at them sideways. To see beyond the flat page. To consider multiple dimensions. To put ourselves in their shoes." He does a good job of seeing old stories with a new perspective.
Thanks to NetGalley and Leafwood Publishers for providing an advance reader copy of this book in exchange for an honest review.
August 28, 2019
The greatest thing I liked about this book is the author himself. He comes across as open, honest, authentic, self-examing, and humble. I like that in an author and in a preacher. Quite frankly I don’t see it much in the churches. The book is comprised of several short chapters (about 4 to 5 pages). Les uses biblical examples to relate to the pain and brokenness that comes to us all through life. Les has credibility because he has been through more pain than most of ever will face. Be that as it may, his book is something that all of us can relate to. Like the author I too have envisioned the cold steal of a revolver between my teeth because life had become unbearable. My faith in God was shaken. I think if we are honest we all face doubt at one time or another. We all wrestle with God and that is why I believe some will gain some consolation from this book.
July 29, 2025
Still Wrestling is a raw, deeply personal journey through faith, grief, and healing. In the wake of unimaginable tragedy—a double murder that shattered his family and faith—Pastor Les Ferguson doesn't offer easy answers but instead embraces the struggle. Rather than preaching from a pedestal, he walks alongside readers, exploring biblical characters through their flaws, fears, and doubts. His honest reflections transform scripture into a mirror for our own pain and questions. This isn’t your typical Bible study—it’s a lifeline for those who feel like God has gone silent. Compassionate, courageous, and rooted in grace, Still Wrestling is a powerful testament to the faith that endures not in spite of suffering, but because of it.
October 11, 2025
This was a relatively quick read as the relaxed, conversational tone paced me through the book nicely. Les shares vulnerably from the depths of his lowest moments, the brutal double murder of his wife and child. His wrestling is raw and honest as he confronts a long held quid pro quo relationship with God. The book wanders in the second half and at times the writing style is annoying in its casual and distracted nature. I would still recommend this to someone who is processing tragedy and wrestling with doubt.
3.6/4.0
3.6/4.0
July 10, 2018
Great Book.
You will laugh, cry, frown and say “I get it”. This is a refreshing book to anyone that has served in a full-time ministry position. A must read for current and past staff. Perfect for someone dealing with divorce, grief, empty nest, regret... basically every small group. Buy it! 🤗
You will laugh, cry, frown and say “I get it”. This is a refreshing book to anyone that has served in a full-time ministry position. A must read for current and past staff. Perfect for someone dealing with divorce, grief, empty nest, regret... basically every small group. Buy it! 🤗
June 25, 2018
I’ve read this twice. A great walk through scripture
April 22, 2018
5 stars
Pastor Les Ferguson Jr. suffered an enormous tragedy when his wife and son were brutally murdered. While his faith in God never wavered, he began questioning the whys of what God allows to happen. Pastor Ferguson stepped down as lead pastor at his church. He shares his quest for answers, his eventual remarriage and return to the pulpit.
This is a phenomenal book. Early in the book, he states that those who have suffered from some life-altering tragedy knows the exact moment when their world imploded. It really resonated with me. Every person has had a traumatic or life-alternating event in their life and Pastor Ferguson has written a Biblically solid book to help navigate through the pain and the questions.
Each chapter of the book starts with a Bible scripture about a prominent person in the Bible from Genesis to Jesus who wrestled with God over circumstances in their life. He uses a very unique approach to teaching these stories, literally any Christian will be able to relate to and learn from this book. Each chapter ends with questions to ask yourself and points to ponder.
This is the first book I have read by Pastor Ferguson and it will not be my last! I highly recommend this book.
Pastor Les Ferguson Jr. suffered an enormous tragedy when his wife and son were brutally murdered. While his faith in God never wavered, he began questioning the whys of what God allows to happen. Pastor Ferguson stepped down as lead pastor at his church. He shares his quest for answers, his eventual remarriage and return to the pulpit.
This is a phenomenal book. Early in the book, he states that those who have suffered from some life-altering tragedy knows the exact moment when their world imploded. It really resonated with me. Every person has had a traumatic or life-alternating event in their life and Pastor Ferguson has written a Biblically solid book to help navigate through the pain and the questions.
Each chapter of the book starts with a Bible scripture about a prominent person in the Bible from Genesis to Jesus who wrestled with God over circumstances in their life. He uses a very unique approach to teaching these stories, literally any Christian will be able to relate to and learn from this book. Each chapter ends with questions to ask yourself and points to ponder.
This is the first book I have read by Pastor Ferguson and it will not be my last! I highly recommend this book.
Read
July 20, 2018Honest. Realistic. Gut wrenching. Contemplating re-reading. An interesting approach or description to Bible verses and Bible characters. short and direct chapters. Would be good study for a small group.
September 12, 2018
I chose this book because I have been struggling with the lows of extreme loss and trying to reconcile my faith through it all. This book not only showed me a fresh honest perspective it gave me the tools to help those around me. Thank you to the author for sharing his story.
Displaying 1 - 11 of 11 reviews