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The Man Who Wore His Wife’s Sarong
Stories of the Unsung, Unsaid and Uncelebrated in Singapore.
A mother finds out her son is gay; a daughter finds out her two mothers are lesbians; a niece stumbles upon the body of her dead uncle dressed in his wife's sarong kebaya; and an old man's nascent feelings for a Filipino maid lead him back to his suppressed art. This book delve beneath the sunlit island's prosperity and coded decorum. Her characters chip away prejudice and sculpt it into acceptance of the other.
Previously published in part as 'The Lies That Build a Marriage' this new collection contains five additional stories.
A mother finds out her son is gay; a daughter finds out her two mothers are lesbians; a niece stumbles upon the body of her dead uncle dressed in his wife's sarong kebaya; and an old man's nascent feelings for a Filipino maid lead him back to his suppressed art. This book delve beneath the sunlit island's prosperity and coded decorum. Her characters chip away prejudice and sculpt it into acceptance of the other.
Previously published in part as 'The Lies That Build a Marriage' this new collection contains five additional stories.
286 pages, Paperback
Published October 1, 2017
10 people are currently reading
132 people want to read
About the author
Suchen Christine Lim
22 books33 followersBorn in Malaysia in 1948, grew up on both sides of the causeway that separates Malaysia from Singapore. Came to Singapore at age 14, studied in the Convent of the Holy Infant Jesus schools, and the National University of Singapore. Taught in a junior college and worked as a curriculum specialist in the Ministry of Education. Resigned in 2003 to write full time.
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Displaying 1 - 13 of 13 reviews
January 13, 2018
An excellent book of enjoyable and easy to read short stories that dig behind the shiny mask of Singapore. The poor and disenfranchised are given a voice by award winning author, Suchen Christine Lim who writes dynamite dialogue. So glad I found this one at the airport bookshop.
December 13, 2023
it's a noble premise to write stories centred ard "unsung, unsaid and uncelebrated" ppl. almost half the stories here are abt lgbtq ppl, n there's oso a fair amt of maids n sex workers thru out the stories.
but... while the book seems to be on these diverse characters' side, i'm not sure it rly succeeds in telling their stories, neither rly making them 3-dimensional or otherwise adding insight abt their lives.
i think it doesn't help that the writing style can be pretty unsubtle at times. there's a lot of tell not show, especially in the endings whr a lot of the stories kinda just fizzle out.
take a story like "Big Wall Newspaper", which starts off with the relatively interesting voice of a bratty kid who talks like he's in a cowboy movie:
But I'll be here, waiting for the Sengkang Kid. Thanks to the Auntie brigade this loo is clean and dry. That's how it is in our elite Saints. We take pride in having a clean loo. ... This block is deserted after school. There will be no spectators this evening. No smart-ass loudmouths to cheer him. It will be a clean fight between the Sengkang Kid and me.
only to, two pages later, change to the much less interesting voice of his mother reflecting on corporal punishment in sg when she finds out her son is gna be caned:
But what can she do? Vandals and errant students are caned in Singapore. But a public caning for a school boy? Even the most hardened vandal is caned in private in the prison. Not in front of an audience of a thousand students in the school hall!
ok, the book captures the Auntie Voice very well, but this is the default tone and voice of the whole book. a simple conversational style isn't inherently bad, i j don't think it rly works here. n it can get q wearying, reading over n over lines like:
Mercy, Mother Mary! What made her think of such painful things this evening? Ack! The past is past!
the lines above are from the longest story in the book, "The Cleaner's Son", which has a pretty unhinged plot involving smuggling drugs via soon kueh. in general, though, it's the shorter stories especially that fell flat bc they don't rly go anywhr. the story "The Morning After", abt a mother whose gay son has just come out to her, is exactly that. the son comes out to her and she accepts him. which is great, but also so what? there's an affirming plot, but the writing doesn't rly add much in terms of emotional depth or insight.
also, for a book abt spotlighting marginalised communities, it naturally raises an eyebrow when in the very first story there's a throwaway reference, among others, to "a time when there were few cars, and migrant workers from China, India or Bangladesh hadn't yet squeezed Singaporeans out of the crowded buses and trains." there's no indication in the story that the narrator shd be taken at anything other than face value.
speaking of, the story of "Gloria" also gives a bit of whiplash, starting with a sympathetic portrayal of a maid who is unappreciated n misunderstood by her employers, and then swerving at the end to the pov of her employers who have discovered she, now with eyes "dumb as a cow's", has been caught stealing n will b gg to jail. our sympathies r with Gloria, since we hv previously read abt her fondly reminiscing abt her kids back home n how things we take for granted in sg can give them an amazing life back there. but we r forced to c the event thru the eyes of her employers, who c her as stupid n ungrateful. it's v jarring. is it to highlight that Gloria is "stunted emotionally" due to the shitty conditions in sg, as another reviewer says? or is it actl to say Gloria is stupid n wasted her future away. either way, i don't understand if the intention is achieved by the abrupt cruel ending. n one also questions if either the beginning whr she's mistreated, or the end whr she turns to stealing, is a meaningful break from existing narratives abt maids in sg.
the story "The Tragedy of My Third Eye" also struck me as pretty unrelenting in its account of a poor girl, bullied n lagging behind in sch cuz she can't rly speak english, n also being mistreated at home. maybe the cruelty is the point, but i can't tell if i liked it or not.
finally. no fault of the author's, but i wonder how much care went into editing this book, given the minor grammatical errors in the text, the introduction n even the back cover. or simple things like the drug smuggling dumpling being spelled "soon kueh" on one page and then "suon kueh" on the next...
the story i enjoyed the most was probably "Retired Rebel". the description of the uncle finding meaning n beauty in his woodcarving was somewhat moving. yup
but... while the book seems to be on these diverse characters' side, i'm not sure it rly succeeds in telling their stories, neither rly making them 3-dimensional or otherwise adding insight abt their lives.
i think it doesn't help that the writing style can be pretty unsubtle at times. there's a lot of tell not show, especially in the endings whr a lot of the stories kinda just fizzle out.
take a story like "Big Wall Newspaper", which starts off with the relatively interesting voice of a bratty kid who talks like he's in a cowboy movie:
But I'll be here, waiting for the Sengkang Kid. Thanks to the Auntie brigade this loo is clean and dry. That's how it is in our elite Saints. We take pride in having a clean loo. ... This block is deserted after school. There will be no spectators this evening. No smart-ass loudmouths to cheer him. It will be a clean fight between the Sengkang Kid and me.
only to, two pages later, change to the much less interesting voice of his mother reflecting on corporal punishment in sg when she finds out her son is gna be caned:
But what can she do? Vandals and errant students are caned in Singapore. But a public caning for a school boy? Even the most hardened vandal is caned in private in the prison. Not in front of an audience of a thousand students in the school hall!
ok, the book captures the Auntie Voice very well, but this is the default tone and voice of the whole book. a simple conversational style isn't inherently bad, i j don't think it rly works here. n it can get q wearying, reading over n over lines like:
Mercy, Mother Mary! What made her think of such painful things this evening? Ack! The past is past!
the lines above are from the longest story in the book, "The Cleaner's Son", which has a pretty unhinged plot involving smuggling drugs via soon kueh. in general, though, it's the shorter stories especially that fell flat bc they don't rly go anywhr. the story "The Morning After", abt a mother whose gay son has just come out to her, is exactly that. the son comes out to her and she accepts him. which is great, but also so what? there's an affirming plot, but the writing doesn't rly add much in terms of emotional depth or insight.
also, for a book abt spotlighting marginalised communities, it naturally raises an eyebrow when in the very first story there's a throwaway reference, among others, to "a time when there were few cars, and migrant workers from China, India or Bangladesh hadn't yet squeezed Singaporeans out of the crowded buses and trains." there's no indication in the story that the narrator shd be taken at anything other than face value.
speaking of, the story of "Gloria" also gives a bit of whiplash, starting with a sympathetic portrayal of a maid who is unappreciated n misunderstood by her employers, and then swerving at the end to the pov of her employers who have discovered she, now with eyes "dumb as a cow's", has been caught stealing n will b gg to jail. our sympathies r with Gloria, since we hv previously read abt her fondly reminiscing abt her kids back home n how things we take for granted in sg can give them an amazing life back there. but we r forced to c the event thru the eyes of her employers, who c her as stupid n ungrateful. it's v jarring. is it to highlight that Gloria is "stunted emotionally" due to the shitty conditions in sg, as another reviewer says? or is it actl to say Gloria is stupid n wasted her future away. either way, i don't understand if the intention is achieved by the abrupt cruel ending. n one also questions if either the beginning whr she's mistreated, or the end whr she turns to stealing, is a meaningful break from existing narratives abt maids in sg.
the story "The Tragedy of My Third Eye" also struck me as pretty unrelenting in its account of a poor girl, bullied n lagging behind in sch cuz she can't rly speak english, n also being mistreated at home. maybe the cruelty is the point, but i can't tell if i liked it or not.
finally. no fault of the author's, but i wonder how much care went into editing this book, given the minor grammatical errors in the text, the introduction n even the back cover. or simple things like the drug smuggling dumpling being spelled "soon kueh" on one page and then "suon kueh" on the next...
the story i enjoyed the most was probably "Retired Rebel". the description of the uncle finding meaning n beauty in his woodcarving was somewhat moving. yup
January 18, 2018
The author is a winner of Singapore Literature Prize. I was privileged to meet her in person during GTLF2017.
This compilation of 14 shorts were written in a very tactful manner. Words and plot twist, perfect! Combining some historical background of old Singapore and it's neighbouring countries. Very open in a way but subtle. I sincerely enjoyed the whole book. The best among all is The Cleaner's Son. Kudos to Suchen Christine Lim for her ability to bring us back to the old days with her words. No value pushing though a few of the stories explored some serious sexuality issues and some political situations.
A must read, grab it if you see it at any book shelf!!!!
This compilation of 14 shorts were written in a very tactful manner. Words and plot twist, perfect! Combining some historical background of old Singapore and it's neighbouring countries. Very open in a way but subtle. I sincerely enjoyed the whole book. The best among all is The Cleaner's Son. Kudos to Suchen Christine Lim for her ability to bring us back to the old days with her words. No value pushing though a few of the stories explored some serious sexuality issues and some political situations.
A must read, grab it if you see it at any book shelf!!!!
May 26, 2021
Enjoyed this short book of stories of Singapore’s ‘unsung, unsaid, uncelebrated’. It was interesting to read coming from a different culture (S Asian), if at times confusing as a result. While the stories probed areas that not often discussed, I wished that more of the book talked of a more modern Singapore. Most of the stories were primarily set in the 1980s and before, and I would have liked to see how many of these issues remain in 21st century Singapore.
Particularly enjoyed ‘The Cleaner’s Son’, ‘Retired Rebel’, and ‘The Morning After’.
Particularly enjoyed ‘The Cleaner’s Son’, ‘Retired Rebel’, and ‘The Morning After’.
December 20, 2022
Lim is clearly talented in writing, both in style and her way of writing marginalized characters in a sympathetic light. She touches upon topics such as the acceptance of gay people, the death penalty for drug traffickers and even exploring the lives of prostitutes. For that, I can see why she won awards for her stories.
However, many of her stories start out well, only to fall short on the ending. Many of her stories end abruptly, feeling incomplete many of the times. Ironically the stories that I really like are the ones with a good ending to it, where the themes of the stories were given closure.
I recommend reading "The Cleaner's Son", "The man who wore his wife's sarong" and "The Lies that Build a Marriage". Three of them had the strongest thematic progression and a good closure ending. There are other stories with decent ending, but these three reflects Lim at her best, in my opinion. Many of the others feel more like padding to a story collection rather than being a crucial part of the story collection.
However, many of her stories start out well, only to fall short on the ending. Many of her stories end abruptly, feeling incomplete many of the times. Ironically the stories that I really like are the ones with a good ending to it, where the themes of the stories were given closure.
I recommend reading "The Cleaner's Son", "The man who wore his wife's sarong" and "The Lies that Build a Marriage". Three of them had the strongest thematic progression and a good closure ending. There are other stories with decent ending, but these three reflects Lim at her best, in my opinion. Many of the others feel more like padding to a story collection rather than being a crucial part of the story collection.
June 22, 2021
Suchen Christine Lim has the uncanny knack of capturing authentically Singaporean voices of my parents' generation and their concerns, struggles, values, and contradictions. It was a nostalgic read journeying into a Singapore-that-was, somehow preserved out of time via the author's prose. Yet despite the length of time past, some of the struggles depicted have not lost their relevancy - especially the one story of a long-suffering mother and her dalliance with narcotics.
The two things I could say were shortcomings for some of the book's stories were 1) that some of them ended just as they seem to start getting interesting, i.e. fairly arbitrarily and maybe even conveniently; 2) the female voices in the book felt somewhat repetitive in tone, mayhaps from the similar thematic struggles the characters faced in the places and roles allocated to them by society. Nevertheless, the stories themselves are worth a read into the unpolished Singapore that existed, or still does, beneath the gleaming PR and gloss of "success".
The two things I could say were shortcomings for some of the book's stories were 1) that some of them ended just as they seem to start getting interesting, i.e. fairly arbitrarily and maybe even conveniently; 2) the female voices in the book felt somewhat repetitive in tone, mayhaps from the similar thematic struggles the characters faced in the places and roles allocated to them by society. Nevertheless, the stories themselves are worth a read into the unpolished Singapore that existed, or still does, beneath the gleaming PR and gloss of "success".
June 1, 2020
2,5 -> 2
Reading the world - Singapore
Uneven collection. Some stories were really engaging, the other boring.
Venture where others don't dare. Speak unspoken, say out loud what's hushed. And that's what Lim is doing. Son comes out as gay? It doesn't change anything. Girl was brought up by loving lesbian mums? That's unusual but it turned out OK for the narrator in the end. And so on.
She also doesn't hesitate to point out things bothering her. The desperation, when you have no money to treat your seriously ill child. Prostitution. The importance of literacy. Foreign workers, interracial and interfaith marriages...
Reading the world - Singapore
Uneven collection. Some stories were really engaging, the other boring.
Venture where others don't dare. Speak unspoken, say out loud what's hushed. And that's what Lim is doing. Son comes out as gay? It doesn't change anything. Girl was brought up by loving lesbian mums? That's unusual but it turned out OK for the narrator in the end. And so on.
She also doesn't hesitate to point out things bothering her. The desperation, when you have no money to treat your seriously ill child. Prostitution. The importance of literacy. Foreign workers, interracial and interfaith marriages...
February 12, 2023
An amazing collection of short stories set in and around Singapore about ordinary Singaporeans. Behind the glossy surfaces there are people who are awkward, carry secrets, live with guilt, bear heavy burdens and battle with poverty, family conflicts and illness. This writer gives a voice to these unsung people, the not so model citizens who don’t fare in the posters promoting a clean and proper our Singapore.
Her writing is real, emotional and cuts to the core, across cultural and religious barriers and says what needs to spoken about more openly. I found myself slowing down to savor each story as I went through this collection.
Her writing is real, emotional and cuts to the core, across cultural and religious barriers and says what needs to spoken about more openly. I found myself slowing down to savor each story as I went through this collection.
September 3, 2023
the stories portrayed the complexities and the multidimensional aspects of being human, some stories were so painful that i had to take breaks reading them because of how real they felt
the only reason i can’t give it a 5/5 stars was because of the pain and frustration that i genuinely felt reading this book 10/10 recommend if you want to torture yourself emotionally
the only reason i can’t give it a 5/5 stars was because of the pain and frustration that i genuinely felt reading this book 10/10 recommend if you want to torture yourself emotionally
December 26, 2017
I received a free copy of this book as a Goodreads giveaway.
An intriguing title which ultimately didn't quite deliver for me. An interesting read, but a little frustrating in that it didn't fully hold my attention which was a shame really.
Liked it but didn't really like it.
An intriguing title which ultimately didn't quite deliver for me. An interesting read, but a little frustrating in that it didn't fully hold my attention which was a shame really.
Liked it but didn't really like it.
August 6, 2018
This was a Goodreads giveaway. Fascinating, interesting collection of short stories set in Singapore.
March 19, 2023
An absolute page turner! Brilliantly written
October 19, 2025
Easy read; some more memorable than others. A few were bordering boring though, or at least I drifted in amd out of the pages. A mixed bag of characters and their stories, not unlike the quirky, attention-grabbing title. On the whole, ddn't come away enjoying this as much as I had expected to, pity.
2025 update:
Read it a second time unknowingly till I got to the last story; some deja vu there. Same sentiment after all these years. The most poignant could be the last one, The Lies That Build a Marriage.
2025 update:
Read it a second time unknowingly till I got to the last story; some deja vu there. Same sentiment after all these years. The most poignant could be the last one, The Lies That Build a Marriage.
Displaying 1 - 13 of 13 reviews